onspectrummarapril2012smallpdf

The newsletter of the Autism Society of Southeastern WI

March/April 2012

On the SPECTRUM

IN SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN

Members’ event: Pump It Up

visit www/conta.cc/xFDLIi, or call the office at 414.427.9345 and give the names of all the people in your family that are coming and how many of those are children who are planning to use the equipment.

Be sure your children are wearing socks, as they will not be allowed on the equipment without them. Parents must sign a liability waiver for their children. Food will not be served and Pump It Up does not have concessions, so be sure to fill up beforehand.

Members can enjoy an evening of bouncy fun for the kids and networking with other parents and have something to do the week of spring break! Join us on Wednesday, April 11th, 6:15-8:15 p.m. at Pump It Up Inflatable Party Zone, 195 North Janacek Road in Brookfield. We will have the place to ourselves—they will be closed to the public that evening. Admission is free for our members—this event is being funded with money we received from the Potawatomi Miracle on Canal Street program. Please register, as SPACE IS LIMITED for the number of people who are using the bouncing equipment. Online,

Our Mission: To support people with Autism Spectrum Disorders, their families, professionals,

and others, by sharing information, supporting research, providing

networking opportunities and promoting awareness through

education and training.

In this special

AWARENESS AND

ACCEPTANCE issue:

Page 3: Executive Director’s page. Page 4: Upcoming movies. Page 5: Parenting Series schedule. Page 6: Sibshops, expanded. Page 7: Are you optimistic? Page 9: Grandma and autism. 0: $1k to learn about autism. Page 11: Coffee talk and big dreams. Page 12: It is what it is for one family. Page 13: Luv U Mom. Thx. Page 14: Will we listen? Page 15: Summer Symposium returns.

You are not alone.

Calendar 2 March-April 2012 Autism Society of Southeastern Wisconsin www.assew.org

March 1st, Thursday — “Morning Coffee” Parent’s Support Group, 9:30-11:30 a.m. Come for coffee, donuts and the support, information,

camaraderie and laughs that you can only get from fellow spectrum parents! Autism Society office: 9733 W. St. Martins Rd, Franklin. March 10th, Saturday — Sensory Friendly Film at AMC Theater at Mayfair Mall, Wauwatosa and AMC Star, Johnson Creek, 10:00 a.m. “Dr. Suess’ The Lorax.” Admission is payable at the door. Subject to change without notice. March 17th, Saturday— Parenting Series, “A Grandparent’s Perspective” with Claire Topp, 9:30—11:30 a.m. Nicolet High School, Glendale. Register at our website or call the office at 414.427.9345. Free. March 21st, Wednesday — Adults on the Spectrum Support Group, 6:30 p.m. at the Autism Society office, 9733 W. St. Martins Rd, Franklin. Casual conversation, light refreshments. No pre-registration necessary. March 26th, Monday — Board Meeting, 7:00 p.m. March 31st, Saturday — Autism Gala 2012, 6:30 p.m. at The Pfister Hotel, 424 East Wisconsin Avenue, downtown Milwaukee. $125 per person. April 5th, Thursday — “Morning Coffee” Parent’s Support Group, 9:30-11:30 a.m. Come to our office to chat and exchange information and ideas with other parents. You are not alone. Autism Society office: 9733 W. St. Martins Rd, Franklin. April 6th, Friday — Autism Society office closed for Good Friday.

April 7th, Saturday — Sensory Friendly Film at AMC Theater at Mayfair Mall, Wauwatosa and AMC Star, Johnson Creek, 10:00 a.m. “The Pirates! Band of Misfits.” Admission is payable at the door. Subject to change without notice. April 11th, Wednesday — Pump It Up Member party for Autism Awareness Month. 6:15-8:15 p.m. at Pump It Up!, 195 North Janacek Road Brookfield. Free to members and immediate family. April 18th, Wednesday — Adults on the Spectrum Support Group, 6:30 p.m. at the Autism Society office, 9733 W. St. Martins Rd, Franklin. Casual conversation, light refreshments. No pre-registration necessary. April 21st, Saturday— Parenting Series, “Optimistic Parenting” with V. Mark Durand, , 9:30—11:30 a.m. Italian Community Center, 631 East Chicago Street, Milwaukee. Register at our website or call the office at 414.427.9345. Free. April 23rd, Monday — Board Meeting, 7:00 p.m.

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Autism Society of Southeastern Wisconsin March-April 2012 3

Autism Awareness Month 2012: How will you participate?

April is Autism Awareness Month. Have you even wondered why increasing autism awareness a key part of our mission? When my son was diagnosed in the early ‘90s, many people I knew had never heard of autism. For years, our annual fund-raising gala was called The Rainman Ball because the 1988 Dustin Hoffman film brought autism to most people’s attention for the first time. Due to the dramatic increase in individuals being diagnosed over the past two decades, autism is now better known, and some question the need for continuing Autism Awareness Month. We have come a long way, but we have a long way to go!

Synonyms for “awareness” include the words familiarity, consciousness, and comprehension. The fact is that even though much of the public is now familiar with the term autism, pernicious myths persist that: Autism only affects children;

People with autism are lacking in empathy; Nonverbal individuals have nothing to contribute; Autism is a parenting problem, and children with autism are just naughty; There are safety nets in place for “people like that” when their families cannot care for them; “Experts” exist that provide appropriate support in education,

mental health, employment, and medical arenas. Individuals with autism and their families know that while we have an increasing number of allies, there is still much education to be done in all parts of our community to dispel these myths. Antonyms of “awareness” include ignorance and insensitivity, and unfortunately, we all have stories that can attest to the continued existence of ignorance and insensitivity and the harm they do in our lives. Early intervention and education can make a tremendous difference in the quality of life for our kids. But even with the best interventions, the majority of children diagnosed with autism will continue to need some support as adults. So while families, therapists, and educators work diligently to get our children ready for the community, it is also necessary to advocate and raise awareness so that the community is ready for our children and the adults they will become. Each one of us has the potential to make a positive impact in the world. You don’t need to be rich or famous to have an impact. If you are willing to tell your story about how autism has touched your life with the people you

By Emily Levine, Executive Director

meet every day, you can increase autism awareness. As I talk to people about autism, I discover that I am not the only one who has a son or loved one who lives on the spectrum, or with another disability. There is a ripple affect as we reach out and find common ground, strengthening connections and finding ways to work together.

You can help increase autism awareness by: Making a donation in support of our work when you get your April

“Day On The Hill:” advocating and raising awareness in D.C.

Continued on next page...

4 March—April 2012 Autism Society of Southeastern Wisconsin www.assew.org

Sensory Friendly Films Enjoy first-run movies that everyone else is seeing—without the usual complications that keep you away from theaters! Sensory Friendly Films is a program of the Autism Society and AMC Theatres to give families of children with autism that opportunity. In March, the movie will be “Dr. Suess’ The Lorax,” from the creators of Despicable Me and the imagination of Dr. Seuss. It will be shown at 10:00 a.m. at AMC Star in Johnson Creek and AMC Mayfair in Wauwatosa on Saturday, March 10th, 2012. Admission is payable at the door. In April, families can enjoy “The Pirates! A Band of Misfits,” an animated adventure with a star-studded cast providing the voices. This movie will be shown on Saturday, April 7th, at 10:00 at the

same AMC Mayfair and AMC Star Johnson Creek. Again, admission is payable at the door. As always with Sensory Friendly Films, the regular concession stands will be open, but children on special diets are welcome to bring their own snacks. “Sensory Friendly” means the auditorium will have the lights

adjusted and the sound turned down and no previews or advertisements will be shown before the movie. The usual “Silence Is Golden” rule is also not strictly enforced. The show dates and times are arranged by AMC Entertainment, based on film release schedules of first-run family movies. Dates and movies are subject to change.

Autism Awareness Month membership drive and appeal letter; Telling your story and making connections with others; Put an autism awareness magnet on your car, or wear the autism ribbon lapel pin (available through our office or via the letter you will get in April); Calling, writing a letter, or visiting with a legislator – sign up for legislative alerts at http://www.dawninfo.org/. There are more synonyms for “awareness” that show the goals to which we aspire, words like appreciation, understanding, and enlightenment. The community we want for our friends and relations with autism spectrum disorders is not a community where they are only barely tolerated. Drew Goldsmith, a young man from Madison who has autism, was asked about autism treatments at a conference I attended. He replied he prefers to see people with autism to be treated - with respect. Amen! We want to live in communities where people with autism are appreciated and understood, and where enlightened attitudes enrich all our lives. Together, we can make a difference, starting in Autism Awareness Month.

...continued from previous page.

Autism Society of Southeastern Wisconsin March—April 2012 5

Parenting Series for Parenting Series for Parents of Children withParents of Children with

Autism Spectrum Disorders Autism Spectrum Disorders 20112011--2012 Schedule2012 Schedule

Register at our website.

The workshops are FREE but we do request that you register. The Parenting Series is designed for parents with young children but all are welcome.

Childcare is not available. Schedule subject to change.

Saturdays monthly:

September 17th Keeping Our Kids Safe in the Community Joel Lashley, Public Safety and Health Care Security Trainer

October 15th Building Positive Relationships with Others and Yourself Wade Koski, LCSW, Discovery & Recovery Clinic

November 19th Using Technology to Improve Learning and Communication Sharon Hammer and Lisa Ladson

January 21st Friendship, Part 1: Increasing Social Understanding Mary Graczyk-McMullen

February 4th Friendship, Part 2: Building Social Networks Lynn Brusnahan, PhD and Collin Brusnahan

March 17th A Grandparent’s Perspective on Autism Claire Topp

April 21st Optimistic Parenting (LOCATION: ITALIAN COMMUNITY CENTER) Dr. V. Mark Durand, PhD.

May 19th Simple Visual Supports for Home Use Julie Arens and Heather Eisenman, elementary educators

Unless otherwise noted, workshops are held at Nicolet High School in Glendale—D Wing Library, 9:30 to 11:30 a.m.

6701 N. Jean Nicolet Rd., off of I-43, just south of the Good Hope Rd. exit

NOT JUST FOR PARENTS!NOT JUST FOR PARENTS! Educators and other professionals are invited and encouraged to attend!Educators and other professionals are invited and encouraged to attend!


Sibshops to expand — give your input to improve this important program

Are you familiar with the Sibshop program? Sibshops are lively events for brothers and sisters of kids with special needs. With an emphasis on wellness and fun, Sibshops give kids a chance to meet other sibs, play outrageous games, talk about the good (and not-so-good) parts of having a sibling with special needs with others who “get it” and have even more fun! There are now almost

300 Sibshops in eight countries. Thanks to the generous donation from Potawatomi Bingo and Casino’s Miracle on Canal Street, we are able to expand on and build the programs we offer, including this important program. The popular Sibshop program that we already offer in conjunction with Easter Seals of Southeast Wisconsin is now going to be offered at a second location, to be determined.

Our Sibshops are designed for children ages 8-13. But sibs do not outgrow their desire to support their sibs with disabilities, and to network with other teens in the same boat. For that reason, Don Meyer, the founder of the national Sibshop movement, has started a FaceBook page and email yahoo group for teen siblings. For more information on how to register, go to: http://www.siblingsupport.org/connect/sibteen-facebook-group-and-yahoogroup. One teen Sibshop participant in Oklahoma created a moving video about a sibling and her brother that won critical acclaim. You can read about his story, and view the video here: http://tinyurl.com/79osf8y.

Get more information and give your input on Sibshops! We are holding a meeting on Thursday, March 15th, at 6:30PM at Easter Seals, 7111 W. Center St. in Wauwatosa to

solicit feedback on the Sibshop program from current participants and provide information for people who want to learn more about Sibshops, or are thinking about having their child participate. If you would like to attend, register online:

www.tinyurl.com/sibs3-15-12

Or call us at (41) 4427-9345 for more information.

Hope and Help for You and Hope and Help for You and Hope and Help for You and

Your Challenging Child…Your Challenging Child…Your Challenging Child…

Optimistic Optimistic Optimistic ParentingParentingParenting

Feeling overwhelmed and unhappy is not inevitable for you and your challenging child!

You can do something about your child’s behavior—you can have control!

You are invited to this very special Parenting Series presentation featuring this bestselling author!

FREE!

Dr. Durand’s book... Saturday, April 21st, 2012 8:30 Breakfast & Networking

9:30—11:30 presentation Italian Community Center 631 East Chicago Street, Milwaukee

Please register at our website: www.assew.org/educational programs


Alan Forbes Julie Arens President Secretary Mark Cyganiak John Meerschaert Vice President Treasurer Howard Miller Vice President Lynn Brusnahan Immediate Past President

Our Mission: To support people with Autism

Spectrum Disorders, their families, professionals, and others, by sharing

information, supporting research, providing networking opportunities and

promoting awareness through education and training.

Directors: Kim Banach Lou Banach Jamie Berger Deborah Berrang Darren Bornemeier Rebecca Goldman Kathy Kuri Michael Nauman Christopher Scherer Dawn Schwartz

Our 2011Our 2011Our 2011---2012 Board of Directors:2012 Board of Directors:2012 Board of Directors:


We greatly appreciate your memorial and honorarium donations

Our 2011 annual campaign was completed recently, and with it we received numerous donations to honor families and individuals — often children — who are living with autism, along with professionals who work with children with autism. Among those honored were: Julie Arens Jared Banach Owen Berther William Canzoneri Mia Cyganiak and family Joshua Dretzka Parker and Alan Forbes Vaughn Frank Tyler Fraundorf Matthew Gaeth Bryce Haase Henri Johnson Tate Johnson Harley Wyatt Johnston Javin Lawrence Rutger Lens Kelly Lyons

Jeff Mehlhorn Connor Parker Rodri Perez Mason Rohloff Edward Scherer Tim and Zoe Smith Christopher Solberg Alex Swiderski Andy Telford Jack William Tyler and Anna Wolf Colin Boehme Zeimetz Benjamin Zyduck

We are always honored and appreciative when we receive donations that honor a loved one who has passed away or who has an autism spectrum disorder. In recent months, we have received many such donations. Our thanks and condolences to the family and friends of James Ketter. Donations in his honor totaled $1,150. Carolyn Gebhardt’s family and friends continue to send in donations since she passed away several months ago. Donations also continue to come in to honor the memory of Shirley Harper, Emily Levine’s mother. We are also honored to have received donations in memory of Lillian Burnett, Christopher Hepworth, and Lucille Kuppert.


March Parenting Series offers one local grandparent’s perspective What's it like to learn your kid's kid has been diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder? What can grandparents do to support their children and grandchildren on this autism journey? Our March Parenting Series will focus on a unique and often overlooked perspective on autism: the grandparent’s perspective. Our speaker, Claire Topp, will talk about her family's story, along with these unique topics and more. Parents and grandparents will gain tons of insight from this presentation! Claire Topp is both the grandmother of a young boy on

April’s speaker author of helpful books

Excerpted from “Loving Your Grandchild with Autism” by Jennifer Krumins in Autism Asperger’s Digest Magazine: “Structure and routine are essential for your grandchild’s safety and peace of mind. Follow dietary restrictions, routines (no matter how odd they seem), and communication guidelines that parents set…. Anxiety manifests through their behaviors. This is NOT a discipline (or lack thereof) issue. It is an autism issue...”

the autism spectrum and a professional in the field of autism education. She is a nationally certified school Psychologist and Certified Applied Behavior Analyst who works with the Elmbrook School District. Please share information about this very special workshop with the grandparents in your child’s life! This session will be held at the usual location, Nicolet High School, 6701 N Jean Nicolet Rd., Glendale, on Saturday, March 17th, 9:30—11:30 a.m. As always, the session is free and

open to the public. Light refreshments will be served. Child care is not available.

We are optimistic that April’s Parenting Series will draw a large audience, so we’ve moved the session to a larger venue (see page 7). The reason we think more people will be attending is because we are bringing in a widely recognized authority (and father) on autism spectrum disorders and challenging behavior and the author of a bestselling book on children’s sleep problems. Dr. V. Mark Durand, Ph.D. delivers both philosophical hope and practical help to parents of children with a wide range of challenges in his most recent book, Optimistic Parenting: Hope and Help for You and Your Challenging Child. With keen

insight, gentle humor, and practical tools and strategies, Durand guides parents step by step through the process of pinpointing the "why" behind challenging behavior, tuning in to their own thoughts, emotions, and self-talk, understanding how their thoughts affect their interactions with their child, interrupting negative thoughts and replacing them with positive, productive ones, achieving a healthy balance between taking care of their own needs and their child's needs, using effective emergency strategies when quick behavior intervention is needed, implementing long-term strategies for lasting behavior improvements, weaving functional communication

training into everyday routines and interactions, addressing the most common problem areas, such as sleep and transitions, increasing mindfulness and parenting "in the moment.” Durand's decades of work with thousands of parents will help families on their own journey to better parenting and happier lives, less stress, and family harmony. Be sure to register early for this Saturday, April 21st, presentation by visiting our website (www.assew.org) and clicking on “educational programs.” Also this month: arrive at 8:30 for breakfast and networking!


Support Support GroupsGroups

You are not alone. You are not alone.

Adults on the Spectrum: For 18 and older with Asperger Syndrome or High Functioning Autism. This is an opportunity to meet others for conversation. Light refreshments are provided. Meetings are held at the office – 9733 W. St. Martins Rd, (Hwy 100) Franklin. March 21st, Wednesday, 6:30—8:30 p.m. April 18th, Wednesday, 6:30—8:30 p.m.

Morning Coffee Parent Support Group: For parents/caregivers of children of any age with any functioning level of autism spectrum disorders. Meetings are held at the office.

March 1st, Thursday 9:30-11:30 a.m. April 5th, Thursday 9:30-11:30 a.m.

Feeling stuck connecting? Partnering with Parents is a group facilitated by two local professionals in the field of relational therapies. Relational therapies concentrate on helping children with autism and other developmental disabilities build skills in relating to their parents and others and making the social connections that come more naturally to their peers. Erica Scheifflee, MS CCC-SLP, a speech therapist, and Deb Berrang, M.Ed, owner of Dynamic Connections, whose practices focus on relational therapies, have started the Parenting with Parents group to

We are proud to once again sponsor two $1,000 scholarships for future or current professionals committed to learn more about educating or treating individuals with autism spectrum disorders, or to graduate students pursuing research in the area of autism spectrum disorders. The requirements are: you must already be enrolled in a 4-year undergraduate program or a graduate program in education or be enrolling for the upcoming year and you must intend to teach students with autism spectrum disorders special education upon completion of a program or be completing research in the area of autism spectrum disorders.

Contact our office for an application and essay instructions. You’ll also need to include 2 letters of recommendation. Late applications will not be accepted. A committee reviews applications and selects the scholarship recipients. Applications are due May 16, 2012. Winners will be selected June 30, 2012. Recipients will receive recognition during a ceremony at Dylan’s Run at Indian Summer Festival in Milwaukee Wisconsin, Sunday, September 9th, 2012, and must be present on that date.

Educator scholarships available

bring parents together who are interested in connecting with other parents, learning strategies to foster their child’s development, and strengthening their relationship with their child. Their next meeting, “Feeling Stuck? How to Keep the Connection Flowing” meets on Saturday, March 10th. From 3:00 to 4:00 the parents will gather and connect, and from 4:00 to 4:30 there will be a facilitated discussion. The meeting will be held at 2995 S Delaware Avenue, Milwaukee. This is for parents to attend only—no child care is provided.


Morning Coffee: there for each other

If you’ve never been to our Morning Coffee Parent Support Group, we encourage you to give a meeting a try. Maybe you think that a support group is just a bunch of hand-wringing and “woe-is-me” whining—or perhaps you’ve been to a support group that was like that. Well, you haven’t been to

Morning Coffee! Sure, we’ve shed some tears. But more often, we’ve laughed and had a few hours in the company of others who “get it.” A lot of times, we exchange a tremendous

amount of valuable information, ideas and resources. There is no better source for info than other parents! Recently, one parent told another parent about how she found reliable child care for her small son on a website called Care.com. The second parent wanted to find a

Authentic Unique Truthful Individual Sensitive Me

That's what my son's definition of autism is. My 14 year old son is a complex mix of at peer level, immature and mature beyond his years. He's an aspie with a big heart, a high IQ

companion for her grown daughter—someone who could take her movies, shopping, and shows once a month or so. She checked out that same website, and found just the right person. At another recent meeting, a parent was having issues with her son’s school over how they were handling his behaviors and need to take occasional breaks. She received a lot of input and pep-talk from the group that month. She returned the next month to happily report that she had reached an agreement with school that worked well for her son. If you can make it, we welcome you to join us the first Thursday of each month at the office. The schedule is printed on the previous page. Hope to see you!

Teen boy has big heart and big dreams (honor roll at Kradwell), constant quest for knowledge, childish interests and teenage hormones. My son is a Boy Scout and lives by the Scout motto. His dream is to be an Eagle Scout and he's well on his way. What other 14 year old boy would have a special bond with an Alzheimer's patient in the same facility as his Grandma? He has a gift with this sweet confused elder. The dichotomies of his

Submitted by Sandy Krause behaviors often amuse me. One day we were driving home and I saw a teenage girl walking a cute little dog. I said 'look at that dog'. My son said 'oh what a cute, cute puppy' in a squeaky little kid voice. A moment later he said 'and hey that girl is hot too', this one in a teen boy voice. What a sample of diversity within one person. But that's one of the mysteries of autism isn't it? The blend of the gifts and challenges, ever changing, ever evolving.


“It is what it is” was just one of the phrases I would hear from family or friends when I discussed my son’s diagnosis of autism with them. Each time I heard that phrase I stayed calm and cool on the outside but inside I was burning with anger. As a matter of fact, after getting a diagnosis, which confirmed my wife’s and my suspicions about our son having autism, I was angry about several things. Yet, even unhealthier than the initial anger was the immense fear and worry I carried. Fear of not knowing how the future is going to be for yourself, your family, and your child. Fear about how your life is going to be so much different than friends and family with typical children and the little things you will miss like T-ball, sleepovers, school plays, and seeing your child fall in love. Fear of us having to explain this diagnosis to our family, and an even greater fear that they just might not get it. We suspected our son Keegan was autistic around 15 months and received the official diagnosis shortly after his second birthday. The initial blow was devastating for both my wife and I. With my background as a therapist, I knew the struggles individuals and families faced with this diagnosis. I was knocked out by the idea of my son being autistic. I was not only coming to terms with him being a two-year-old with autism but my brain

continuously fast-forwarding through the struggles he would face into adulthood because of autism. My wife, on the other hand, was learning about the disorder for the first time. Instead of the punch in the gut I felt, she experienced sharp jabs of anguish as she went through this journey. For her it became more real when Keegan did not want to play with her, when she got looks in the grocery store, and having to plan small vacations in a big way only to cancel last minute for fear it would just not work out. Whether you handle this disorder focusing on the future or one day at a time, it can be really easy to feel like you are drowning in a sea of uncertainty. Like many mothers and fathers, we investigated autism extensively and discovered the variety of issues that accompany this disorder. Hearing stories about how the effect of autism can divide many of the relationships in the family. Moreover, how a number of communities remain unaware of autism and in some cases unaccepting. Parenting is hard enough as is, so how were we going to lead the life we planned with an autistic son? Furthermore, how were we going to make autism fit into our lives and not make our lives fit into autism? We found the answer is strengthening and building relationships. I discovered that some people

will be on board right away and some people will be on board in their time and some people may simply never be on board. At first I wasted my energy wondering why some people denied this was a part of our life, but realized that I needed to put my energy into focusing on those who were there from the start. I learned the key to over come the challenges in life is to establish and maintain positive relationships to support you whether it's a spouse, parent, sibling, or friend. My focus went toward reaching out to those that are willing and able to support. Spending time on those that just do not seem to get it was wasting energy and amplifying my frustration. Instead, now my focus is directed toward those that can give support and those who want to be supportive but are unsure how. My wife and I found that we need to break our relationship into parts. We have our roles as “parents,” “business partners,” and “husband and wife.” Blending the roles was not working. Each role is important and as such we need to be able to discuss “parent” or “business” things one part of the day and set aside some together time to enjoy at a different point in the day. We provided family and friends with articles and movies on autism so they could read and watch on their time. To reduce strange looks and comments from others in the community we are building relationships with the owners or employees of our commonly visited stores.

It is what it is… one family’s journey By Wade Koski, in collaboration with Sonia Koski


A snippet of hope in text

There is a broad range of information and support in our community. If you do not have supportive family or friends, there are many opportunities to create bonds with others. Support groups allow you to discuss with others about the frustrations related to autism and provide opportunity to laugh about the oddly funny things our children do. Fundraisers are a good place to meet other parents and families while feeling free from judgment. In addition, some events are built around just the parents having a night out. Seminars help build a better understanding of all the forms of treatment for your child as well as a better understanding of how school education plans work. Through my experiences thus far I have found that taking care of myself is serious. As human beings we tend to over complicate things when we encounter difficult times in our lives and forget about getting back to the basics. I am finding that taking care of myself is the best thing I can do for my family, my children and others in my life. I know I would not want my child to have a teacher that is sad all the time, a coach that is angry most of the days, a guidance counselor who is hopeless about the future, or a playmate who is inattentive because they worry. Those are just some of my roles as Keegan’s father and if I am not taking care of myself than how much am I helping him? “It is was it is” and what that means to me now is I am going to love Keegan with all that I have and put my energy into

providing him all the security and acceptance I can. We have to allow ourselves to put autism away at times and just enjoy the special moments with our kids. Now that phrase reminds me to accept Keegan, and others with disabilities, as they are. The true way to help individuals with special needs is to not only focus on a cure but, more importantly, to focus on building community acceptance. Wade Koski is a Licensed Psychotherapist who works with autism affected families in metro Milwaukee.

From a mom of a now 19-year-old young man on the spectrum: Meaningful language came about for my son at about age 10 and is still very shaky around people he doesn’t know very well, but when he was three, I never would have thought he would graduate from ABA, graduate high school, drive and start college. This is a text conversation we had recently: Me: Your brother has to stay after school. Can you talk to him to see if he needs a ride home? Mike: Yeah, yeah. I got it….. He’ll be fine mom. I’ll take care of it. Me: Thank you honey. Makes me happy you can take care of yourself and your brother when you need to. Mike: Of course. Me: I guess I did an ok job of raising you. Mike: Damn right you did! Me: Thank you. I needed to hear that. Mike: No problem mom. Luv you 10 whole bunches.

Dear Friends, With mixed feelings of sadness and excitement I announce that, after 5-1/2 interesting and wonderful years, I’m leaving the Autism Society for my new adventure in a marketing position in the corporate world. I hope to stay in touch with as many of you as possible, though, and to contribute what I can in time and energy to the cause. I've made many good friends here and I've enjoyed tremendously the opportunity to help people connect with resources and find help, hope, and information. It’s been a great pleasure to serve the Society using my creative abilities to get the word out about all the Autism Society does to serve the individuals and families of Southeastern Wisconsin touched by autism. I will miss you all,

Julie Boehme

Submitted by Jennifer Krzoska


Autism Awareness: will we listen to each other? By Erin Miller

"It was six men of Indostan To learning much inclined, Who went to see the Elephant (Though all of them were blind), That each by observation Might satisfy his mind..."

Everyone knows the story of the blind men and the elephant. The story goes that six blind men encounter an elephant and report back on their experiences. They each touched one part of the animal and start arguing about who was right. Some will attach a certain moral to the story--but my question is, why was it so vitally important to be the one who got it "right"? A similar question to the one the blind men ask exists in conversations on autism. There are all sorts of people have opinions on who is right. But I would ask again, why is it so vitally important to be the person who writes there name on, plants their flag, who calls out "first" about autism?

No one knows everything. I know some things that you don't know, you know some things that I don't know. No one person or organization can or will be able to do everything and be everything. But someone else might have some information that you're looking for...if, you're willing to listen. Goodness knows there are plenty of people willing to talk...and talk, and talk, and

talk. Whatever the diagnostic spiel says, autistic people don't have a monopoly on monologues (though we can be quite good at it if you get us started on something we're interested in) In either case, a conversation involves give and take, talking and listening. We act, react, and act again. Not all the same time or the same amount at each turn, but there is always a choice — and the choices we make now will affect the lives of the people we love, for many years to come. There is a conversation about autism amongst parents, autistic adults, teachers, grandparents, brothers, sisters, organizations, and many more. All of whom have plenty to say. Some will ask who is right. The bigger question is will we listen to each other?

Erin (on the left in this picture) is a young adult committed to improving

quality of life for individuals on the autis-tic spectrum--including herself! She is

unemployed but not out of work. After a long day of volunteering at the library,

Erin likes to read, write poetry, and spend time with her cat Lily.

It's really all in how you look at it....--anonymous

I wanted a piece of the moon. In the dim light of my bedroom lamp with sky blue walls as the dark streams in outside, I had a frame of blue night sky. Starless midnight sky around a halo, a lip of light. That was the Cinderella frame. That was the fairy tale. My mother had chosen this frame, wanting something nice

for me. Seeing how the blue echoed the unicorn’s sky, white made the absurd animal shine, she tacked it on my wall. On the entrance wall to my bedroom. Twenty-six and jobless, twenty-five then, I was angry. I’m young, I’m in my prime. I’ll never have this kind of energy again. I’ll go to the office and cluck with other ladies my age, 'how awful' in response to another shooting in the inner city. I’ll talk about my

Also by Erin… Reframing


We are proud to sponsor the second annual Autism Summer Symposium on evidence based practices to be presented by two highly regarded local educators, Lynn Stansberry Brusnahan, Ph.D. and Mary Grazyck-McMullen, M.S. This symposium is designed for individuals who want to understand and support the growth, development and learning of individuals with autism spectrum disorders. This includes special and general education teachers, birth to three staff, therapists, childcare workers, job coaches, family members and others interested in learning more about evidence based practices in the area of autism spectrum disorders. Students will develop competencies in evidence based practices and learn to evaluate, identify needs, develop goals, design interventions, monitor effectiveness and adjust programming for individuals with autism spectrum disorders. CTED 715—Evidence Based Practices will be held 8:30 a.m.-4:30 p.m., June 25—27th, 2012. The course fee is $300, plus 3 optional continuing education credits may be earned for a fee of $105 per credit. School Districts are encouraged to have teams attend. Districts that pay for two participants may send a third

Second Annual Symposium offers graduate credits and evidence-based autism info

participant free of charge. The three credits are available through the University of St. Thomas. Founded in 1885, the University of St. Thomas is the largest private university in Minnesota. The university educates practitioners to be morally responsible leaders who think critically, act wisely and work skillfully to advance the common good. Lynn Stansberry Brusnahan, Ph.D. is a faculty member at University of St. Thomas and also serves on the Autism Society board, presents at state, national, and international conferences and parents a young adult with autism. Mary J. Graczyk-McMullen, M.S. is a highly regarded consultant/workshop leader in autism for school personnel, community agencies, professional and national organizations. She has been involved in the autism community for over 30 years. This symposium will be held at the Jewish Community Center, 6255 North Santa Monica Boulevard, Milwaukee. Register online at: www.tinyurl.com/8ypnobx. For more specific information on the course, call the office and we will give you contact information for the instructors.

son and rush off to rescue him from the hospital or boredom or from being left after school at his soccer game, I thought. “That’s life” mom says. And sadly I agree. The small frustrations pile on like snow, though it was only sleety this afternoon not two hours ago. For the time being I ignore the dark mark of where I erased all my mistakes but somehow they still show anyway. My cold toes twirling on the slimy deck, bare feet beslimed, I dance in the moonlight. The picture of the unicorn my mother framed for me brought in the sky, making a bright halo of white, a ring of light. It was nice. But I wanted the moon. The faint silver sliver gleam that catches fast and fades into the night.

About this piece, Erin tells us: Mom and I were decorating my room with a picture I got for Christmas. When I got it, I was so excited and immediately imagined the perfect picture frame, in my mind, to put it in. Before I got around to doing it, mom found one at Goodwill that she thought might go well with the art on my wall.

Autism Society of Southeastern Wisconsin Improving the Lives of All Affected by Autism

NONPROFIT ORGANIZATION

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MILWAUKEE, WI PERMIT NO. 104

Autism Society of Southeastern Wisconsin 9733 W. St. Martins Road Franklin, WI 53132

Phone: 414-427-9345 Email: [email protected]

www.assew.org Facebook.com/ASSEW

Editor: Julie Boehme

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