measuring and managing the social context of teams

Prospering in a Increasingly Complex World

Managing your “Fifth Force” to manage your performance and risk

3

Introduction – Preparing to “Launch”

SocialContexts

& Repetition

OurAgreements

PersonalSharing

SomeChallenges

4

Challenge – Changing your Perception

The horizontal lines are actually straight

Apollo 8

5

Challenge – Changing your Mindset

Attention to things you likely don’t think

about

Mindset-shift

Attention Mindset

Where Attention goes, power flows

6

A Challenge – You Acting Before Disaster

“Experiential” activities

“Significant Emotional Experiences”

Attention Mindset Behavior

Attention Mindset Behavior Results

7


SocialContexts

& Repetition

OurAgreements

PersonalSharing

SomeChallenges

8

Occasionally, societies get

“excess energy” from

stored energy

Hundreds of Years

On average, we only have the energy

we can extract from

the sunToday, we are harvesting energy stored over millions

of years

“Excess Energy” Tech & Social Complexity

+ +

An intellectual response to Technical

complexity is OK

An intellectual response to

Social complexity is inadequate

9

High Tech

Challenger’s Explosion KAL Crashing Hubble's Mirror Flaw

NOAA-N’ Dropped

Low Tech Catastrophic

Fukushima Explosion

Flawed Contexts – Nothing is Immune

10

“Systems Engineering” Your Home Context

Accept Personality Difference

sHealthy Family Culture

EmotionsAppropriate

Expressions of:

No FamilySecrets

MutualRespect

Behaviors Context

Sense ofBelonging

RealityHope

Response-abilityThoughts&

11

“Systems Engineering” Your Team Context

Innate Personality

Culture DiagramsExpressed ThoughtsExpressed Emotions

- Must Express?

Stuck in “S” (Situation)Move Attention to Outcome

Expressed Story-lines and Emotions inhibit progress(Mindsets/Attitudes)

Expressed Story-lines and Emotions advance progress

Authentic Appreciation -Opens Communications

Shared Interests -Stimulates Collaboration

Thorough Inclusion -Builds Support & Avoids Anger

Kept Agreements -Demonstrate Trustworthiness

Reality-based Optimism -Focus on Outcome

100% Commitment -Solutions appear

Absence of Drama -Sustains Response-ability

Clear RAAs -Efficient Action

Now, take action toRealize desired Outcome!

MutualRespect

Behaviors Context

Sense ofBelonging

RealityHope

Response-ability

12

“Mitigating Workshop Decay”

You must re–stimulate this learning, until the eight behaviors become habitual (~2 years),

because these behaviors are invaluable.Brain Rules: We forget 90% of what we

learn in a University class within 30 days.

13

A Hard Reality, the Forgetting Curve

Within a week, without review, we forget >90%

of what we learn – Hermann Ebbinghaus

(1895)

Repetition to learn

the Times–table

Itzhak Perlman –

Practice – 5 hours per

day

Every top team and athlete

practices

14

Repetition on Three Time Scales

Choose a 4-D“Czar”-Track TDA actions;

discuss at staff meetings

Re-TDA, 4%

boost per

cycleRe-

workshop, a two or

three-day event

Coaching, boost

0.4% per

session

- Must Express?













BottomQuintile

< Ave.Quintile

AverageQuintile

> Ave.Quintile

TopQuintile

53% 66% 70% 75%

66% 71% 76% 80%

72% 75% 79% 83%

77% 81%

84% 90%

All 198 teams with multiple assessments (2008)Average ~4% Enhancement / TDA cycle

+7%/TDA

+5%/TDA

+4%/TDA

+2%/TDA

+2%/TDA

+13% +4% +5%

.... ....... .. .. ..... .. ..

Re-IDA attention to your

behaviors

15


SocialContexts

& Repetition

OurAgreements

PersonalSharing

SomeChallenges

Our Workshop Agreements and a Personal “Keeping

Agreements” Inquiry

or

Keep your agreements? Trustworthy

Break your agreements? Untrustworthy

17

Agreement – Seated & Ready to Go

2nd Chair writes agreement on Chart

18

Then, Freely Move & Stretch

Every 20–30 minutes

19

Agreement – Contribute Twice/Day

Turn in a “poker chip” when you contribute…

…end the day with none

20

Scored Agreement – Your WB Cover

2nd Chair writes agreement on Chart

You will score your agreements as a self-test

Day 1 – Seated & ready?

Kept Break/Lunch

Broken

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

Total


Kept Break/Lunch

Broken

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

Total


Kept Break/Lunch

Broken

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

Total

Day 1 – Chips gone?

Noneleft

Oneleft

Twoleft


Noneleft

Oneleft

Twoleft


Noneleft

Oneleft

Twoleft

21

Agreement – Be Fully Attentive…

No Side Conversations

No PDAs

22

4-D Processes Plus Your Content

4–D Systems Processe

s

Your (Expertise) Content

+

High-Performance Context

23

Three Team-Level Fifth Force Diagnostics


s


3 Diagnostics

Culture DiagramsInnate Personality Driving Mindset

24


s


Story-linesEmotion

s

The Core of Leadership – Mindset

Mindset (Attitude)Expressed ThoughtsExpressed Emotions

Mindset

25


s


Eight Behaviors

Eight Context-setting Behaviors

AppreciationShared Interests

InclusionAgreements

RealityCommitment

No DramaAccountability

26


s


3 Diagnostics

Eight Behavior

s Context Shifting

Worksheet

Processing your Fifth Force Elephants

- Must Express?













Mindset

27


s


3 Diagnostics

Eight Behavior

s

Habitual Story-lines

Story-lines

Emotions

Missed Opportunity

Agreement – Use this Opportunity Wisely

29

Your “Cards” & Signing Your Agreements

Now, sign your agreements

30

Agreement – Focus on Changing You

This workshop is about you changing you.

(The workshop to change other people is “down the hall.”)

Mindset (Attitude) is everything!

Success changing other people?

Success changing your spouse?

31

Agreement – Renegotiate Before Breaking

You avoid broken agreements by renegotiating your agreements before you

break them.

32


SocialContexts

& Repetition

OurAgreements

PersonalSharing

SomeChallenges

Personal Sharing Enhances Your Trustworthiness

342nd Chair collects cards and reads them

Write something about yourself that might

surprise your colleagues on a white card (E.G.,

Gender unusual?)We try to

guess who you

are

If not, “Fess up”

Stand and describe the

results you are Accountable to

produce

Share Something Personal

Where Attention

goes, Power Flows

35


SocialContexts

& Repetition

OurAgreements

PersonalSharing

SomeChallenges

An InquiryWhen I directed multi-hundred million dollar projects, I wondered, Why did projects meet budgets, requirements, and milestones – and

then did not?

Physics Nobel Laureate, John Mather, said “Charlie, I am

convinced that half of the cost of a project is socially determined.”

Some years later, I discovered that John was onto something.

The Fundamental ForcesManmade “Fifth Force”

FieldsControl Human Behaviors

Mother Nature’s ForceFields Control Technical Matters

Scientists & Engineers Teams & Leaders

Gravity Weak

Nuclear E-M

Years, developing individual technical abilities

Easy “4-D Systems” processes,managing collective behaviors

Appreciation

Including

Hope

Response

Social Contexts

38

Diane Vaughan: The important question is

“Why did they proceed to launch when all the data

suggested otherwise?”

What Could Have Prevented the Explosion?

Technical error

Fifth Force management would have prevented this disaster.

“It is unfortunate that the sociological

explanation is the correct one, as these forces are invisible

and unacknowledged.”

Root cause – what’s your bet?

Technical abilities or Social context?

Space Shuttle

Challenger’s

Explosion – 7

Astronaut Fatalities

Fifth Force: Pressure to launch;

Behavior: “Normalization of Deviance” Required ever

stronger technical arguments to delay a launch than continue

39

Hubble

What Could Have Prevented the Flaw?

Technical error

Failure Review Board: The root

cause was a “leadership

failure”

Ground-based

“Team Social Context” was

not in the vocabulary

Fifth Force management would have prevented this failure.

And, diminished the overruns by hundreds of Millions of dollars



Hubble’s Flawed Mirror – Useless

$2B Telescope

Fifth Force: Stress of recurrent ($400M) Overruns Unrelenting hostility toward the contractor’s

management;Behavior: First rationalized suspicious test results, then

withheld them

40

What (finally) Restored KAL to safe flight?

Alteon, a Boeing

subsidiary, placed

observers in the

cockpits

Fifth Force: Confucianism in KAL cockpits; Behavior: First

Officers ignored Captain's errors,

“tuned-out”

Safe flight requires two

pilots, working as a team;

One “driving” &One managing the avionics

Fifth Force management (English, “CRM) restored safe flight.


Individual’s piloting abilities or Social context?

Korean Air Lines

Crashingat 17X

international norms, for four years!

41



Fifth Force: Culture of habituated sloppiness;

Behavior: Ignored procedure requiring

confirmation that the bolts were in place

What Crashed Satellite “NOAA – N Prime”

An unmanaged Fifth Force field

wrecked a weather satellite.

The crew tipped the Weather

Satellite over not realizing that the bolts had been

removed, causing $135M in damages

Fifth Force management would have prevented this failure.

42


Individual’s knowledge or Social context?

Harry’s DinerWorried

about toast quality, he

asked consultants to train his

waiters

Fifth Force: Waiters had too many roles, insufficient

toasters;Behaviors: Impossible to make

consistent toast (training would have been a total

waste)

What Saved Harry’s Diner?

Fifth Force management (RAAs; more toasters) saved Harry.

Consultants refused to

provide training;Performed

context diagnostics

43

Fifth Force: Culture of Japan

Behavior: Reflexive obedience; Reluctance to

question authority; Groupism; and Insularity

What Destroyed Fukushima Daiichi?

Government Failure Review

Board: The disaster was both manmade and avoidable


Fifth Force management would have prevented this disaster.

46

Social Context Management

OnlineDevelopment(Assessments)

Workshops Coaching

The 4-D System develops Social Context management abilities

While intellectual ability is adequate

for Technical effectiveness

Social effectiveness requires intellectual,

emotional, & behavioral abilities

“CSW” - Creating a Favorable Context (Fifth Force)

- Must Express?













Intellectual,Reference

manual

Intellectual,Repetition,Behaviorfeedback,Actions,Progresstracking

Intellectual,Emotional,Solutions,Actions

Intellectual,Emotional,

Experiential,Systems

perspective

Intellectual,Emotional,Solutions,Actions

47

Contexts Behaviors

Would you modify your behaviors in each of these contexts:

Giving / receiving a marriage proposal?

Fiancé's family

dinner?

Bachelor / bachelorette party?

Hijacked on honeymoon

?

“It is unfortunate that the sociological explanation is the correct one, as these forces are invisible and

unacknowledged.”

Managing the Invisible Fifth Force Field

#5 – Seeing Invisible Forces

2. See the field with “tracer

particles”

1. Analyze the field into

manageable components

3. Manage the field with

“DevelopmentAssessments”

that Benchmark;Educate; and

Generate actions

49

“Analyzing” Invisible Fields

“The right coordinate system turns an impossible problem into two really hard ones.” –

Undergraduate physics

+

Intuited

Emotional Logical

Sensed

DecidingInformationDilbertCartesian

Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication – Leonardo da Vinci

50

4 “Dimensions” ≡ Universal Human Needs

Physiological Needs:Air, warmth, sleep, water, food

Emotional Need #1:Feeling safe

“Arab Spring”

51

“Visioning” – We all

need Reality/Com

mitment

“Cultivating” – We all

need to feel appreciated

“Directing” – We all need the ability to respond

“Including” – We all need to feel that we belong




Emotional Need #2:Feeling appreciated

Emotional Need #3:Feeling Included

Logical Need #1:Reality/Commitment

Logical Need #2:Response-ability

Self-ActualizationRealizing One’s Potential The Four “Dimensions”

52

Hopeful,Realistic,Futures

FeelAppreciat

edMeet your Account-

ability

FeelIncluded

Making Invisible Force Fields Visible

Observe Peoples’

Behaviors

Observetracer particles

How might you observe invisible magnetic fields?

How might you observe invisible Social Contexts?

That they address core human needs

What would be the first criterion

for these behaviors?

53


MutualRespect w/OpenCommunications

Authenticityand Efficiency, Absent Anger

WillfulCollaboration

Appreciate Interests

Inclusion

54

Inappropriate Inclusion Anger, Unfairness

These live in groups (think “teams”) and

know each other.

Two are separated and asked to perform a simple task. If

you reward both (equally) with cucumber, they are perfectly happy to do this 25 times in a

row.

An old experimen

t, with fresh

Capuchin monkeys.

However, if you

give one a

covetedgrape…..

And, the other only

cucumber, expect

an ATTACK

56


“Magical”Solutions

Response-ableAction

MutualRespect w/OpenCommunications

Authenticityand Efficiency, Absent Anger

WillfulCollaboration

Trustworthiness

Creativity

Clear and Achievable

Expectations

Appreciate Interests Reality

Inclusion Integrity No Drama

Commitment

Accountable

Acknowledging Unpleasant Realities with an Optimistic Mindset

Can Sustain Creativity

Context of SustainedCreativity

AcknowledgingUnpleasant

Realities

#6 - Unpleasant Realities

60

Andy Grove and an Intel “Elephant”

“The Japanese are hammering us on the cost of manufacturing

RAM.”Management

Team: “No problem, we can

beat them!”“The unpleasant reality is that we

cannot beat the Japanese on cost. If we try, the Board will fire us, and

rightly so.“

Let’s imagine that we are the people they hired to replace us – what would

we do?“

61

Choosing Suitable “Elephants”

• Stay with the “Focus on changing ourselves” theme• Pick something that people really do not want to discuss• A Situation (and Outcome) you can clearly and simply state• Manageable scope, not “Cure world hunger”• Involves (difficult) personal matters• Troubling relationships are suitable• “Boundary” issues are very commonSome suitable Situations:S: We lack uniform understanding of (performance) expectationsS: Our team leadership is ineffectiveS: Our resources are inadequate to meet the requirementsS: Our organization chart does not workS: Team members resist AccountabilityS: Our interfaces with other teams are brokenS: We have the wrong (sub) contractors doing the wrong workS: Team members prefer to fight with each other than collaborate

62

Who Are You, Really?

#7 – Innate Personality - I

Innate ≡ Organization absent experience

And, what’s your natural (innate)

contribution to Social Contexts?

63

Personalities Natural Contributions

Naturally value people, bringing

appreciation & deep values

Naturally value relationships, bringing inclusion & harmony

Naturally value new ideas, bringing

creativity & vision

Naturally value organization, bringing process and discipline

64

Innate Personality is like Handedness

While we all use both hands, we describe our innate preference with “binary terminology.”

Write your name on your

workbook cover

With your other hand, write your name on page 2

65

Innate Deciding Processes

Emotional deciding process (50%):

Take events personally;

“Want results we can all feel good

about”

Logical deciding process (50%):

See events objectively;

“Want results that make logical

sense”

I don’t understand it.

It just feels right.

66

Innate Information Preferences

Sensor (70%): Observant, organized,

detail oriented perspective

Intuitor (30%): Insightful, scattered,

creative, big–picture

perspective

Entering at about 25mph,…on, and

on and on.

67

Choices for your Personality Quiz

Imagine aContext

Or

Choose early in

life?

Choose which is

more true

Choose quickly

68

Check Your Preferences – WB P. 2

EMOTIONAL DECIDER Check LOGICAL DECIDER

Harmony is intrinsically valuable Harmony is a means to an end

Prefer to act on “what feels right” Prefer to act on “what’s logical.”

Consider the people first Consider the task first

Prefer harmonious relationships Prefer being right

Decide through consensus Decide with my own thinking

First, trust my heart First, trust my head

Conflict intolerant OK with conflict

Total – Emotional 7 Total – Logical

EMOTIONAL DECIDER Check LOGICAL DECIDER

Harmony is intrinsically valuable Harmony is a means to an end

Prefer to act on “what feels right” Prefer to act on “what’s logical.”

Consider the people first Consider the task first

Prefer harmonious relationships Prefer being right

Decide through consensus Decide with my own thinking

First, trust my heart First, trust my head

Conflict intolerant OK with conflict

Total – Emotional 7 Total – Logical

INTUITED INFORMATION Check SENSED INFORMATION

Rely on my inner knowing Rely on my observations

Think more about “what could be” Think more about “what is”

Prefer creativity Prefer common sense

Act on flashes of insight Act on careful analysis

Prefer wrestling with concepts Prefer wresting with facts & data

Prefer holistic perspectives Prefer details

Love big ideas Love established reality

Total – Intuitor 7 Total – Sensor

INTUITED INFORMATION Check SENSED INFORMATION

Rely on my inner knowing Rely on my observations

Think more about “what could be” Think more about “what is”

Prefer creativity Prefer common sense

Act on flashes of insight Act on careful analysis

Prefer wrestling with concepts Prefer wresting with facts & data

Prefer holistic perspectives Prefer details

Love big ideas Love established reality

Total – Intuitor 7 Total – Sensor

If you are making the inquiry “earlier in life,” you might want to make the questions

past tense.

2nd Chair preps F-C w/ grid

69

Find Your Badge Color, WB P. 3

Pick up your

“leader badge”

Emotional Logical

Intuited

Sensed

Emotional Logical

Intuited

Sensed

Emotional Logical

Intuited

Sensed

Emotional Logical

Intuited

Sensed

Meet me with ideas, freedom, &being the

best.

Visioning“Idea–builders”

Write your name on the flipchart so we can read

itWear your badge so we can all see

it

70

Optimal Personality Distributions

Tom

Sam

AmyEd

Fred

Harry

Jack

John

Barack

Al

George

Jim

DiverseFlexibleTeam

Jan

SamAmy

Ed

Sue

Harry

Jack

John

BarackAl

George

Jim

“Architects”Early-phase

Projects

Ed

TomSue

AmyEd

Jan

Harry

Jack

John

Barack

Al

George

Jim

“Builders”Late-phase

Projects

Anne

71

Innate Personality (Cont.)

Meet mewith values,

empathy,& concernfor others

Cultivating“People–builders”

Meet mewith

relationship,harmony, &teamwork.

Cultivating“Team–builders”

Meet me with ideas, freedom, &being the

best.

Visioning“Idea–builders”

Meet meWith

process, organization,& Certainty

of result.

Directing“System–builders”

If the shoe fits, wear it!

#8 - Innate Personality - II

72

Innate Personality Trumps Reason

He says, to the Frog, “How about a ride across the river?”

Frog says, “OK, hop on.”

73

“You Killed Us Both, Why?”

Our innate personalities pre–program us to behave in ways that may, or may not, serve us

well.

74

The Fundamental 4–D Process

As we go along, learn and habituate this simple sequence – it works

4) Request/ Direct

3) Attractive Future

Lubricate“Stuck”

Situations

2) Include/Collaborate

1) Appreciate

75

Gandhi, a 4–D Leader

Values: Spiritual, non–violent resistance

Inclusion:“I welcome you

all”“God save our…”

Vision: “We cannot lose. They

can torture my body...”

Direction: “We will not submit... not obey Smut’s

law”

…through our pain, we will make them see their injustice.

— Mahatma Gandhi

79

Eisenhower, an Including Leader

Inclusion: “Any person, whether

at the plow in the…”

Values:Being there for

others.

Vision:Victory through

relationship.

Direction: “You must be their

father, mentor…”I LIKEIKE

“Some of my friends are for it. Some of my friends are against

it. I am for my friends.”

— Dwight Eisenhower

82

Howard Hughes, a Visioning Leader

Values:“Richest man in the whole wide

world.”

Inclusion:“Just not

interested in my fellow man...”

Vision:“Fly around the

world…”

Direction:“You’ve got the

ending all wrong...”

I’m going to be the best at whatever I do.

— Howard Hughes

87

Coach Dale, a Directing Leader

Values:Consistency,

control.

Inclusion:“What are you trying

to do?”

Vision:Win through consistency.

Direction: “Pass 4

times!” “Sit down!”

“A team effort is a lot of people doing what I say.”

— Michael Winner

Pass the ball!

91

Match Your Innate Strength to Context

Creating – Research, early phase projects

Organizing – Managing, late phase

projects

Caring – Training, & leading large teams

Relating – Marketing, & leading large

teams #10 - Innate Personality - IV

Conductor – Andris Nelsons

92

Only 50% for an aerospace firm!

Incompetent Manager? (1)

What % of managers are incompetent?

Plan, organize,

direct, control

“Directing” is necessary but not sufficient.

93

EmbraceReality &Vision Optimistic Outcomes

Authentically

AppreciateOthers Include &

Keep Your Agreement

s

No drama & Clear, Account-ability

Incompetent Manager? (2)

My management denies reality and has no

vision.

I don’t feel included & don’t trust

my management.

I don’t feel that my

management values my

contributions.

My management

blames, complains &

ignores Accountability

What’s your take–away from this?

94

Competent Managers (Leaders)

Decide today to join the 30% of competent leaders/managers.

95

Lock the Doors – Film Clip

On July 20, 1969, Apollo 11 landed on the moon. Gene Kranz was the Flight Director,

and Steve Bales was Guidance Officer.Story–line: “Yellow” inclusion

Emotion: Love Group (Affection)(What “color” is Gene’s personality?)

97

Innate Personality Colors Perception

While others see their personality's core as the path to success, you know that your success requires all four

Dimensions.

98

Your Homework, WB P. 3

Do the personality inquiry tonight with your friend/spouse, teaching them the material.

99

Takeaways – Innate Personality

Our behaviors tend to align with our innate processes,

- Committing to be 4–D able enables you to support an effective team Fifth Force (social context); and

- Success will be easier in work contexts that match your innate strengthsComments or Questions before we move

on?

Process & control (Directing).

Ideas (Visioning); or

Relationships (Including);

People (Cultivating);

Your Culture’s Fifth Force (Social Context)

EffectChapter 7: Using the 4–D System to Analyze Cultures

Feynman diagram 4–D Culture Diagram

#11 - Cultures - I

Subatomic Particles Teams, Organizations, …

101

The Four Cultures – Where?

Address members’ deep (human)

values

Address members’ relational needs

Address individuals’ intellectual needs

Address individuals’ process/control needs

Research Universities

Governments

102

Culture Diagram Inquiries

“Lead” matches task & customer?

Firms that built cultures that fit the strategy… grew net income 5 to 10 times faster than other

companies.– Corporate Culture and Performance (1992)

Is yours 1–D ?

Is yours 4–D?

103

Diagramming Your Team’s Culture

Your “Expresses Appreciation” TDA Quintile indicates

the “Green” level in your culture.

Your “Includes Others” TDA

Quintile indicates the “Yellow” level in

your culture.

A short test finds whether

“Blue” or “Orange” leads

your culture.

2nd Chair prepare for exercise

104

Culture Characterization, WB P. 5

1) We grant ultimate power to:

Our technical “wizards” Our (hierarchal) management

2) Our working processes are:

Unstructured and free Rigorous and disciplined

3) Ultimately

Performance trumps budget Budget trumps performance

4) Our management and admin processes are:

Poorly documented and ad–hoc Documented and disciplined

5) Our personal communications are:

Brutally frank Polite and tempered

105

Raise Your Hand, Please

Team A

Blue

Team AOrange Results Summary Team B

BlueTeam BOrange

1) Ultimate power to wizards or hierarchy…

2) Processes are unstructured or rigorous…

3) Ultimately, performance or budget rules…

4) Processes are ad–hoc or rigorous…

5) Communications, brutally frank or polite…

Record the results, WB P. 52nd Chair counts hands & records

107

Record Culture Diagrams, WB P. 6

Record your observations about match of culture “lead” to task

Including

Cultivating Visioning

Including Directing

Cultivating

2nd Chair prepares chart

109

Inclusion

Values

“Blue” Cultures Meet Experts’ Needs

Vision

Organization/Power

Nobel

Diagonal Challenge

110

“Orange” Meets Management’s Needs

Inclusion

Values Vision

Organization/Power

Diagonal Challenge

111

Feed the Culture’s Data–dog

Directive cultures perceive control as central. Hence, you must appear to be in

control.

You can never run out of “biscuits” (e.g. consistency, data, plans) for the Data–

dog.

112

~

A Healthy Org. Respects Differences

Success requires a context that optimizes all sub–cultures.

Directing

Employee Developmen

t

Marketing Manufacturing

Research

(It’s interesting that these core functions match the 4-D System)

~

113

Data–dog

A Unhealthy Org. Overwhelms All

Making all sub–cultures match the “lead” is destructive.

Directing

Employee Developmen

t

Marketing Manufacturing

ResearchEmployee Developmen

t

Marketing Research

121

An Inquiry WB, P. 6

Complete this sentence, Our culture would benefit most from

____________________________________________________

My expressions of Authentic Appreciation

My increased emphasis on harmonious relationships

Processing unpleasant realities to stimulate creativity

Naming process owners to improve organization

122

Takeaways – Cultures

Your collective processes, values, and behaviors, which we call culture is a potent Fifth Force element.

You can enhance performance and competitive advantage by:- Matching your “Lead” to your customer; and- Being 4–D able, with no Dimension below

“threshold”Comments or Questions before we move on?

Your (Project) Team Mindsets’ Fifth Force

EffectInspired by JPL’s John Casani, “I wanted to explain why some project managers are

fired when cost goes from $400M to $410M and others get medals for projects that go

from $400M to $750M.”

orWhat’s in your future?

#13 – Project Team Mindset

124

Basic Project Management

“Orange”

Cost

“Orange”Schedule

“Blue”Performance

Risk

125

Two Incompatible Project Mindsets

Performance rules

Cost (schedule) rules

or

126

Incoherent Mindsets? “You’re fired!”

“Cost,” driven by a sponsor determined to avoid cost overruns.

“Performance,” driven by a sponsor determined to

maximize benefit.

Stakeholders

Stakeholders

Stakeholders

You’reFired!Incoherent

127

The “Blue,” Performance Mindset

Risk

ScheduleCost

Performance

128

The “Orange,” Cost (Schedule) Mindset

Risk

Performance

Cost Schedule

130

Our Team

Performance

Cost

Identifying the Mindsets, WB P. 6

Fill out a 3x5 card like the image below with an “X” in the boxes of your choice.

Record the results in your workbook Page 6

2nd Chair tallies cards, then writes on F-C

131

Takeaways – Project Mindset

As they proceed, projects and their stakeholders necessarily adopt a “Blue;” or “Orange” Mindset.

This Fifth Force element alters perceptions and behaviors. Therefore, you must ensure mindset coherency.

Comments or Questions before we move on?

What Matters for Leadership

Effectiveness?….there is not one trait or characteristic

that has any value in predicting leadership potentials,

none, not even intelligence

Wondering how you can improve your

leadership effectiveness?

#14 – Leadership Effectiveness

134

Attitudes or Skills Inquiry, WB P. 7

Are your attitudes/mindsets

contagious?

1. Write the names of

leaders you admire in your

workbook

2. Now, let's quickly decide if

each is more about Attitudes

or Skills

?

2. Then, write the attributes

that made these people great

leaders

2nd Chair preps F-C w/ vertical line a few inches from left then writes

135

4–D Analysis (I.E., Simplification)

Emotions Thoughts

The 4–D System simplifies Mindsets (Attitudes) into two components you can

manage.

http://www.google.com/url?sa=i&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&docid=M4dkgRoLP09zQM&tbnid=2YZK3S9e5BdZEM:&ved=0CAgQjRwwAA&url=http://www.suemckee.com/2012/07/17/what-is-neuroleadership/&ei=dHaDUdKfPPGeiAfQloC4CA&psig=AFQjCNGtIrNva05O_SphaEfZMQLLvTMAGg&ust=1367656437075119

High-Performance Context

Low-Performance Context

Your Story-lines Drive Performance,Up or Down

Cognitive psychology,

simplified

“Green” S

tory–lines

“Red” Story–lines

#15 - Story-lines - I

137

The Power of Spoken Thoughts

“The word is the most beautiful tool

you have as a human, it is a tool of

magic.”

“In the beginning there was the Word,

And the Word was with God, And the Word was God.”

Our life is what our thoughts make it.– Marcus Aurelius (~150 AD)

138

“Story–lines” and Truth

Story (Webster's) = The telling of a happening, true or fictitious with the intent of informing or

persuading.

The surest unarguable truth is the truth of your experience.

We define “truth” as that which is unarguable.

“Story–lines” are thoughts and expressions that seem true to us but are not the truth because they are

arguable.

139

Are You Guilty of Homophily?

Homophily is our preference to relate

with people who share our Story–lines.

When we hear Story–lines we agree with, a small voice

says….

“That’s the

Truth!”

“That’s just your

Story–line!”

When we hear Story–lines we

disagree with, a small voice

says….

140

Religion Story–lines are Powerful

Man is a religious animal. He is the only religious animal.He is the only animal that has the TRUE religion.Several of them, in fact.He is the only animal that loves his neighbor as himself and cuts his throat if his theology isn’t straight.He has made a graveyard of the globe in trying his honest best to smooth his brother’s path to happiness and heaven.

Religion Story–lines energize, making good people better, and (sometimes) make bad

people worse.

Mark Twain

141

Story–lines About Motivations (1)

Customer – threatening

contract cancellation

Client calls

Fly out to meet

142


Bruce –“Competitor got to them

again”

Sam –“He never liked our

company”

“Bruce, You always see that

competitor everywhere.”

“Sam, You frequently

complain that people don’t like the company.”

“Mary, You often complain about

upper-management.”

Mary –“Getting orders

from above”

143


Projection

144

Now What Do You Do?

Your Story–lines about other people’s motivations are wrong 95% of the time. (Robert

Cooper)

Anybody ask him?

Sam said, “I did – he said that he wanted flexibility to accommodate budget

cuts.”

145

Choosing Your Story–lines – “AMBR”

AttentionNotice

and name Story–lines

“Green” or “Red” according

to the Behavior

they support

Attention

Notice and name

Story–lines

“Green” or “Red” according

to the Behavior

they support

Mindset

It is not OK to run

Red Story–lines

You will only run Green

Story–lines

#16 - Story-lines - II

ResultsAttention Mindset Behavior

146

BehaviorStuck in “S?”Behaviors

Green or Red Story-lines, & “S”

SituationStory–

line

Story–line

Story–line

Story–line

Your Outcomes

147

Story–lines Drive Success or Ruin

“Improving quality means higher cost.”

“Improving quality is the best way to lower cost.”

What behavior does this Story–line support?

What behavior does this Story–line

support?

“Improving quality means higher cost.”

“Improving quality is the best way to lower cost.”

148

Group Story–line Exercise, WB P. 7

Providers “color” them according to the behaviors they support.

Record Story–lines on Pages 9–10 in your workbook.Story–lines you “run” about:

Yourselves?

Your Customers/Sponsors?

The Other Team?

Your Management?

“Green” if they support (desired) Outcomes

“Red” if they distract you from (desired) Outcomes2nd Chair preps F-C w/

vertical line a few inches from left then writes

150

Animals Run Story–lines Too

Whether you think you can do it, or think you can’t, you're right. – Henry Ford

151

Dealing with Red Story–lines

When a team member runs a Red Story–line (e.g. from your team’s

list):Argue?? Inquire Re:

Consequences?Offer a

Replacement?

152

Story-lines

Commit to “running” only “Green” Story-lines,

Sustaining a Fifth Force (social context) focusing people on desired Outcomes.


Managing Emotions to Manage People’s Energy

The English word “emotion” comes from the Latin verb “movere,” to move.

#17 - Emotions - I

154

The Five “Emotion Groups”

Love

Mad

Glad

Scared

Sad

"They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them

feel.“— Carl W. Buechner

155

We Seek Emotional Experiences

Enthusiastic “Fans”

Andris Nelsons – Energizing

Eric Clapton – The “Blues”

Dramatic Finishes

156

How Important is “EQ” vs. “IQ”

Emotional intelligence was twice as important

as technical skills and IQ for jobs at all levels

Senior managers identified the organization’s most outstanding leaders using objective

criteria such as profitability

Moreover, emotional intelligence was increasingly

important at the highest levels

Emotions Thoughts

Daniel Goleman in the Harvard Business Review (What Makes a Leader?)

157

Expressing Your Emotions – Glad

Start Meetings with Jokes?

Uplifting Humor?

OK to play at work?

158

Expressing Your Emotions – Mad

Anger at Injustice?

Anger at Situations

(vs. people)?

Acted Anger?

160

Expressing Your Emotions – Sad

Loss of a Colleague?

Loss of a Contract?

Hubble – Loss Everywhere!

161

The American Astronomical Society

162

Expressing Your Emotions – Scared

Mobilize action before calamity?

Excess fear can immobilize

#18 - Emotions - II

163

Expressing Your Emotions – Love

Loving Your Work?

Loving Your Team-mates?

Loving Your Job?

164

How Are You?

Genki, desu

“My life energy

is good”

Tsai fon le mayo"Fine I

ate today”

“Fine, the weather is

good” (When it’s

not)

“Fine, my stocks are

up”

“Fine, I am really busy”“I hope

you are really busy”

Responses are contextual (cultural)

Why is being busy a good thing?

165

Is Our Busyness an Addiction?

Feel Anxious if not busy?

Addiction – continued

use of a mood altering behavior with life–damaging

consequences

Using Busyness to Mitigate Anxiety?

166

Before You Answer the Phone…

Take two deep breaths

Close Your Eyes for the Conversation

Nobody will suspect that you did this, except

through a deeper sense of “feeling heard” (Inclusion)

167

Expand Time – Pause & Shift Story–line

Name waiting “found time,” then

enjoy it

A powerful Story–line

shift

168

Schedule “Quiet Time” for Yourself

Schedule “meetings” with yourself

Negotiate Quiet

Time for your Team

169

End Busyness by Feeling Your Feelings

Commit to doing

nothing for 10

minutes

Notice your

emotions (Anxiety?)

Belly Breathe into any

discomfort

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170

Noticing and Naming

“One-word Check-in”What are you feeling?

GladCheerful, delighted

, elated,

satisfied,excited,relieved

MadFrustrate

d, irritated, agitated, annoyed, envious, jealous

SadDepressed, guilty, regretful, neglecte

d, isolated, lonely

ScaredNervous, anxious, tense,

worried, distresse

d, dreading

LoveAdoring,

fond, liking, caring,

desiring, longing

171

EQ ≡ Feel & Express Your Feelings, WB P. 8

1. Record emotions you experienced, and the circumstances; then

2. How you intend to express your emotions

Please discuss your findings with your partner

Love

Mad

Glad

Scared

Sad

172

When did you feel Glad?

GladCheerful, delighted

, elated,

satisfied,excited,relieved

173

When did you feel Mad?

MadFrustrate

d, irritated, agitated, annoyed, envious, jealous

174

When did you feel Sad?

SadDepressed, guilty, regretful, neglecte

d, isolated, lonely

175

When did you feel Scared?

ScaredNervous, anxious, tense,

worried, distresse

d, dreading

176

When did you feel Love?

LoveAdoring,

fond, liking, caring,

desiring, longing

177

Takeaways - Emotions

When you experience, and then express your emotions,

you can sustain an energizing Fifth Force (context) Comments or Questions before we move

on?

178

Mutual Respect & Open Communications

Mastery of Habitual Appreciation:

ExpressingAuthentic

Appreciation

Context of Mutual Respect &

Open Communications

#12 – Appreciation - I

179





Appreciation is a “business word”

for love

180

Absent Appreciation Sad, Isolation

181

Unmet Needs at Work

“70% report receiving no praise or recognition in the workplace.”

— Gallup

“64% of those who leave their jobs say it’s because they didn’t feel appreciated.”

— US Department of Labor

70 percent hate going to work, or have mentally checked out, roaming

the halls spreading discontent — Gallup

182

Motivating the Middle 60%

About 20% of the workers are giving all

they can

Another 20% don’t want to give more

The middle 60% say “They would give more to their work

if there were more in it for them.”

What is the “more” they want?They want to feel appreciated.

Will this take more time?

184

How do you name

appreciating bosses?

Appreciating Bosses?

Departing CEO’s of Fortune 500 companies cite lack of appreciation as

the primary reason for leaving their jobs. — News Report

As one moves up in the organization, are their (emotional) needs for

appreciation more, or less likely to be met?

185

Obstacles to Appreciation

Bart Simpson’s dinner blessing: “Dear God, we paid for all this stuff ourselves, so thanks for nothing.”

186

Living in the Mindset of Gratitude

“A thankful heart is not only the greatest virtue, but the parent of

all other virtues. “ — Cicero

“I maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness

doubled by wonder.” — G. K. Chesterton

“We are all heirs and heiresses to a society of freedom and plenty that

most of us did absolutely nothing to earn.” — Ben Stein

187

Living in the Abundance Mindset

“If you are not happy with what you already have, how could you be

happier with more?”— A Greeting Card

Selfless giving supports a life of

abundance.

“Wealth consists not in having many possessions but in having few wants.”

— Epicurus, 300 BC

188

Dr. Dean Ornish, U of C, SF

Regarding appreciation: No other factor in medicine – not diet, not exercise, not genetics, not drugs, not surgery –

has a greater positive impact on quality of life and reduction of disease…

#20 - Appreciation - II

189

Step 1 - Speaking Your Gratitude

Prepare to stand up and speak what you are grateful for about…

Wait! Do not express Appreciation for an

individual now. That is the next step.

Now, say, “I am grateful for…” (e.g. the opportunity to work with

people as motivated and dedicated as you)

Can any of us choose to live our life seeing the glass as half empty, or

half full?

190

Preparing to Appreciate (1)

Standing, if they are in the room, look them in

the eye

191

Expressing Your Appreciation (2)

Speak directly to them saying “(Name), I

appreciate you for…”

If they are not present, tell what you appreciate about this person, then say, I’ll tell them as soon as

I see them.”

192

Completing the Process (3)

The process completes when they look you in the eye, and say, “Thank You”

193

3) Completion: The process completes when they look you in the eye, and say,

“Thank You”

1) Preparation: Standing, if they are in the room, look them in the eye

Appreciation Process – Let’s Do It

2) Appreciate: Speak directly to them saying

“(Name), I appreciate you for…”

194

Use IDAs to Live “HAPPS” Appreciation

Promptly – The sooner, the better

Specifically – The more specific, the better

Habitually – Habits are your personal bureaucracy

Authentically – Decide to live in the mindset of

Gratitude

Proportionally – Appreciate proportional to their

contribution

195

Remedy

Appreciation Business Results

Appreciation is not just about health and aliveness.

It also dramatically enhances “business results.”

Situation

Appreciation Form

Three parts1. Who? 2. For what?3. By whom?

Results

KC Fed Chair

Brainstorming

196

Appreciate People in Your Life Now!

Many words were spoken into the ears of the dead that they yearned to have heard while they were alive.

Tonight, begin habitual appreciation before it is too late.

197

Building “Appreciation Muscles” WB, P. 9

Write the names of the people who you will appreciate tonight:_________________________________________________________________

Draft a (moving) e-mail:Generic front-end: I pause to reflect on you who have

enriched my life. You commitment to character, as demonstrated by your behaviors has been an important

model for me. While I think about you often, I realize that this is not enough. I need to express my feelings and

thoughts.So, ABC, I take this opportunity to express my deep

appreciation for…

Write the names of the people who you will send this to:_________________________________________________________________

198

Takeaways – Appreciation

Commit to living in Gratitude (Mindset), and habitually Expressing Authentic Appreciation (Behavior),

because this can sustain a Fifth Force (Social Context) of:

• Good feelings;• Open communications;• High performance; • Enhanced Health; • While meeting our universal need to “feel

appreciated.”


A Context of Collaboration, Meeting Both Your Needs and

Others’The Harvard Negotiation

Project

AddressingShared

Interests

Context of Collaboration,meeting both your needs and others’

#21 - Shared Interests - I

200

What are “Shared Interests”

Spouse, friends: E.g., good food and wine, international travel, appreciating and caring for each

other, shared religious and political

views, enjoy same music, family

Teammates: E.g., winning

competitions, good and fair profits,

equitable recognition, cover each other’s back,

team and individual success

Matters that both parties are interested in discussing and acting on

Cross-team: E.g., synergistic collaborations,

teaming for competitive

advantage, working, combine abilities to

more effectively perform

201

What Wants of Theirs do I Share?

Pay appropriate

attention to your needs,

values, andinterests.

“People do things for their reasons, not ours.”

Addressing shared interests makes the reasons the same.

And to the needs,

values, andinterests of

important others, e.g. sponsors,

colleagues.

202

Shared Values Defuse Power Struggles

Hubble’s Telescope-Scientist introduced himself to the Project

Manager with “Odom, I’m going to make you

miserable.”

Jim said, “No you’re not because we want the same thing.”

Charlie’s Two Rules:1) Avoid power struggles; and2) Never power struggle if you don’t have the power.

203

Shared Interests & the Hubble Hire

I really want to hire

a key person for

HubbleServicing

Head of Admin says, “NO”

Ms. Admin

Our Mutual Boss (And, I don’t

want to be fired)“Personal–side Bank Accounts”

Badge on the table

204

Addressing My Boss’s Shared Interests

What does my boss want that I can want for him also?

Peace with her and

the other Directors

“Gave me everything

I requested

”

“I (publically) state my

Accountability and resign if we

fail”

205

Ms. Admin’s Shared Interests

Power and control over

me? No Way!

For me not to end–run her in

the future.

What does she want that I can want for her also?

206

Imagine the Conversation?

207

A Juncture

If not, have participants do the exercise in their workbook

I a team wants better collaboration with

another entity, do the exercise on the next

slide (whether the other entity is present or not)

208

What does “X” most want that “Y” can want for them also?

(Only “Y” team members say what “X” wants)____________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

__________

Shared Interests Group Exercise, P. 12

#22 - Shared Interests - II

The activity often generatesSignificant Emotional Experiences (SEEs).

What does “Y” most want that “X” can want for them also?

(Only “X” team members say what “Y” wants)____________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

__________2nd Chair writes on F-C

209

Shared Interests, WB P. 10

Spouse, friends: E.g., good food and wine, international travel, appreciating and caring for each

other, shared religious and political

views, enjoy same music, family

Teammates: E.g., winning

competitions, good and fair profits,

equitable recognition, cover each other’s back,

team and individual success

Matters that both parties are interested in discussing and acting on

Cross-team: E.g., synergistic collaborations,

teaming for competitive

advantage, working, combine abilities to

more effectively perform

210

Takeaways – Shared Interests

Habitually asking, “What do they want that I can want for them also?” can sustain a Fifth Force (context) that:

• Enhances your relationships (e.g. marriage);• Reduces (cross–organizational) conflict; and• Supports you both in getting your needs met:

Because “People do things for their reasons, not ours” and Addressing Shared Interests makes the reasons the same!Comments or Questions before we move

on?

A Context of Authentic Relationships, and Efficiency, Without Energizing AngerDo you under-

include (exclude) emotional distress

(Mad Group)

Authenticity, and Efficiency absent Anger

AppropriatelyIncluding

Others

Do you over–include wasting

time & energy

#23 - Inclusion - I

212






# 1 – Feeling

appreciated. # 2 –

Feeling included.

Emotional!

213

Exclusion Anger, Sadness

214

Personas & Childhood

We all routinely don “masks” or assume roles to show who

we think we “should be”

Caring

Childhood personas to gain affection/avoid pain

Friendly

Smart

Disciplined

215

More About Personas

Consciously donning & removing temporary "personas” can be as

useful as a coat in the winter.

Mr./Ms.Caregiver,

Guru,Teacher

Mr./Ms.Cheerleader

,Nice

Guy/Gal,Clown

Mr./Ms./Dr.Super-

competent,Wizard,

Smarty-pants

Mr./Ms.Director,General,Rambo

We likely adopt adult versions of our childhood personas

216

Persona?

Connecting/

relating through

your heart

Connecting/

relating through your role

Revealing your

vulnerable self

Hiding your

vulnerable self

Others feel

connected and

included

Others feel disconnecte

d andexcluded

Authentic? or

217

The University President

Invitation to our class

It’s safe, be

authentic

“It hurts

like hell”

Students connected

& mesmerize

d

218

The Great Santini

No authenticity,

no vulnerability,

no love, no joy

Habituates a Military Persona

Treats his children

like soldiers

220

Personas (Roles) – Past Workshops

Write a persona you use, in WB, P 11. Does it serve you well?

Mr./Ms.Conscience,

Healer,Minister,

Guru,Consoler,Teacher

Mr./Ms.People-person,

Cheerleader,Nice Guy/Gal,

Clown,Relationship-

mender

Dr./Mr./Ms.Super-competent,

Genius,Smarty-pants,Intellectual-aggressor,

Wizard

Mr./Ms.Authority-figure,

Director,Executive,

Rambo,General,Big-shot

221

Persona Interview, WB P. 11

Interviewer – “Please introduce me to your persona.”Persona – “I’m Mr./Ms. Persona” (naming the persona).Interviewer – “It’s nice to meet you Mr./Ms. (Persona). – “Tell me what you are most proud of, Mr./Ms. (Persona)?” – “How do other people appear to you, Mr./Ms. (Persona)?” – “What is your leadership strength, Mr. /Ms. Persona?” – “What is your leadership weakness, Mr. /Ms. Persona?” – “What are the benefits of this role at work?” – “What are you most afraid of, Mr./Ms. (Persona)?” – “Drop your persona and go back to your authentic self.”Interviewee goes back to their authentic self. – “Can you see how this persona arose in childhood?” – “Is there anything else you realize about yourself?”

Your Personas influence your perceptions and behaviors.#24 - Inclusion - II

222

Inclusion Mindset – Speaking Manners

Be sensitive to “inclusion manners.”Avoid negatives, as in “I only have…”Replace “but” with “and” in your speaking.

Replace “Yes/No” questions with a choice of “Yes’s:”

“Would you rather have lunch at Five Spice or City Café, today?”

223

Personal Sharing & Office Hours

Include others by sharing something personal, andappropriate to the relationship.

Make it easy for others to include you, e.g. office hours

224

Inclusion Mindset – “Hearing” Others

"Many a man would rather you heard his story than granted his

request.“— Phillip Stanhope, Earl of Chesterfield

Make sure that others “feel heard”

Take Response–ability tocommunicate until you are understood

225

Manage Your Meetings

Information?

Actions/Minutes?

Decision?

Agenda?

State the purpose ahead

of timeOr

Document Properly

226

Your “Under-Inclusion Glitches?”

InadequateDelegation?

Inadequate Information?

Sloppy(Group–Member)

Recognition?

227

Your “Over-Inclusion Glitches?”

Too many (boring)

meetings?

Too many Invitees?

Can you do an RAA event at Northrop Dec. 14? [Yes] [OK, thanks]

Use “Subject line” for messages & responses

Burdenedby e-mail?

228

Your Inclusion Inquiry, WB P. 12

Under-inclusionsWhich under-inclusions by you limit your team? (For example: I do not appropriately delegate my power and authority, especially to people who I don’t think are as smart as I am; I am sloppy about recording meeting minutes and action items; I don’t give sufficient thought to who to include when appreciating team accomplishments.) ______________________

Actions I will now take to remedy these: _________________________________

Over-inclusions:Which over-inclusions by you limit your team? (For example; Extending e-mail text beyond the subject line when it is unnecessary; Including minimal or non-contributors in group achievement awards; Inviting people to meetings when providing a summary of what transpired would be adequate; Failing to name meetings as information or decision so people can make informed choices about whether to attend.) ____________

Actions I will now take to remedy these: _________________________________

229

Takeaways – Including

Appropriately Including Others is important,

because it can sustain a Fifth Force context of efficient work, absent unnecessary anger.


Keeping Your Agreements can Sustain a Fifth Force

(Context) of High Trustworthiness

Do your rigorous “agreements” habits

show your trustworthiness?

Context of High Trustworthiness& Efficient Work

RigorouslyKeeping All

Your AgreementsOr, do your sloppy

“agreements” habits show your lack of trustworthiness?

#25 - Agreements - I

Integrity = Alignment of words and actions.

231

Perspectives on Trustworthiness (1)

“Up to half of all daily business activities are compromised or wasted due to mistrust.”

— John Whitney, Director, Deming Center for Quality Management

232


“We tend to judge ourselves by our intentions,

and others by their actions.”

- Stephen Covey

233


“What you do speaks so loudly I can’t hear what you say.”

— Emerson

Late again

Broke your“Contract”

Your behaviors trump your words

Liar, liar, pants on fire

234

Costs of “Late to Meetings is OK” (1)

You energize “Mad–group” and “Sad–group” emotions lowering the quality of feelings (mood) at

the meeting:

Sad group: Alienated, rejected, insulted

Mad group: Irritated, annoyed, frustrated, jealous

235


You energize negative Story–lines:About your motivations.

They have power and almost surely are wrong.About your lack of respect for others.

They are the judges of this, not you.

Wrong 95% of

the time

236


Your lack-of-discipline

wastes people’s time

You create barriers to your input, reducing

the worth of your contributions

237


You separate yourself from others, apparently deliberately.

238


You draw attention away from the working subject towards perceived interpersonal affronts.

239

Score Your Agreements Habits, WP P. 13

Workshop__ I was seated & “ready to go” per projected clock? (Scored, WB Cover)__ I contributed at least two times per day (Scored by chips at end-of-day)__ I scored these two agreements on my Workbook cover__ I was fully attentive, e.g. no PDAs or side conversations__ I used this opportunity wisely, following 4-D processes__ I remained focused on changing me, not other people__ I renegotiated all troublesome agreements before breaking them

__ My Workshop’s overall agreements summary scoreWork

__ I do what I say, when I say, in the way I say?__ I leave meetings in time to get to the next one on time?__ I arrive at all my scheduled meetings on time?__ (add your own) _____________________________________________________ (add your own) ___________________________________________________

__ My overall agreements at Work summary scoreFamily

__ I arrive home for dinner when I said?__ I keep my promises to my partner/spouse?__ I keep my promises to my children?__ (add your own) _____________________________________________________ (add your own) ___________________________________________________

__ My overall family agreements summary score

#26 - Agreements - II

My agreements going forward (Yes or No)__ I will carefully notice when I am entering agreements?__ I will renegotiate troublesome agreements before I break them?This is an agreement that is difficult for me to keep: I commit now to keeping this agreement in the future?

240

Breaking, then Processing Agreements

We all break

agreements

Lack of Discipline

Poor Planning

Unexpected Events

Processing your broken agreement

s

Outhouse(Toilet)

Jail

241

3) FuturePrevention

Processing Broken Agreements

Clear up any “glitches” when you return to work or home.

(If these include marital infidelity, proceed cautiously!)

1) “I broke my

agreement with you”

2) Describe the

Circumstances

4) ExpressRegret

5) Are we now OK?

242

It's half done.

We hope to God.

With 10 times the budget we would have a 50–50 chance.

It'll take a miracle.

25 people incompetent at their regular jobs will review the project.

The money is all gone. We give up.

Essentially complete means:

We predict means:

Risk is high but acceptable means:

Serious, but no insurmountable problems means:

Task force to review means:

System is ready for delivery means:

PM’s “Truth Translation Table”

246

Takeaways – Agreements

Decide now to rigorously Keep All Your Agreements,

because this can sustain a context of trustworthiness which is essential in every

aspect of your life.Comments or Questions before we move on?

Reality based Optimism with 100% Commitment can Sustain Creativity

Context that“Magically” Reveals

Solutions

Being 100%

Committed

#27 - Creativity - I

248







249

Absent Reality, Commitment Hopelessness

250

100% Commitment Alters Perception

When you are inspired by some great purpose…all your thoughts break their bonds…your consciousness expands

in every direction…and you discover yourself to be a greater person than you ever dreamed possible –

Pantajali, 150 BC

Outcome commitment alters perception to reveal solutions.

This is the focused state

of “100% Commitment.”

251

If I could tell you one thing that would make you and your team successful, it

would be this:Find the Outcomes you are committed to

realizing, and focus accordingly.“I know this now. Every man gives his life for what he is committed to. Every woman gives her life for what

she is committed to. Sometimes people are committed to little or nothing, and so they give their lives to little or nothing. One life is all we have, and

we live it as we are committed to living it and then it's gone. But to surrender who you are and to live

without commitment is more terrible than dying – even more terrible than dying young."

— (Modified from “Joan of Lorraine,” a play by Maxwell Anderson)

Outcomes You are Committed To?

253

Two Commitment Mindsets

#28 - Creativity - II

Use Passionate Emotions

100% Committed“Both Feet In”

Less than 100% Committed“One Foot Out”

Address Unpleasant Realities

Run only “Green” Story-lines,

e.g., “Whatever it takes”

Optimism Displaces Reality

“Red” Story-lines are OK,e.g., “I’ll try”

Ignore/Repress Emotions

254

Apollo 13

Set–up: Apollo 13 was the seventh US manned mission to the moon. An oxygen tank exploded limiting power, heat and

potable water. Gene Kranz was (again) the Flight Director.

Glad Mad Sad Scared Love

Use Passionate Emotion(s)?

100% Commitment?

Address Unpleasant Reality?

Green Story-line?

257

Set–up: William Wallace, was a 13th–century Scottish warrior who led the Scots in the First War of Scottish Independence.

Braveheart



100% Commitment?


Green Story-line?

259

Set–up: The United States men's hockey team, led by head coach Herb

Brooks, defeated the “professional” Soviet team, then won the gold medal in

the 1980 Winter Olympics.

Miracle



100% Commitment?


Green Story-line?

261

Make Your Life Incredible, Now

Noah’s Ark

264

A Life of Purpose and Consequence

“Be ashamed to die until you have won some victory for humanity”

– Horace Mann (1859)

There is a vitality, a life force, an energy translated through you – and

because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique…if

you block it – it will be lost. — Martha Graham

“To love what you do and feel that it matters – how could anything be more

fun?” – Katherine Graham

#29 - Creativity - III

265

Charlie’s Life & Commitments

Emotions: I bask in gratitude, habitually expressing my appreciation (love) with words, gestures, and selfless

giving.Commitments:

Myself: 80% Committed to seeking a healthier lifestyle; 100% Committed to a legacy of contribution and selfless service, enriching all who interact with meFamily: 100% to 80% Committed to enhancing happiness in my wife, children, grandchildren and relativesWork: 100% Committed to broadly fielding “4-D” development

Acknowledging an Unpleasant Reality: Turning 70 this year, my time to do this kind of work is limited to 5 to

10 years, at best Green Story-line: There is still time to improve my

lifestyle/ health, so that I can continue to contribute as long as possible

266

Now, Record Yours in your WB, P. 14

I

Acknowledge an

Unpleasant Reality

Examples: I am: In a job that doesn’t suit me; Too verbose; Too argumentative; Caught in hopelessness (Victim); Tired from taking on work that I shouldn’t (Rescuer); Repressing uncomfortable feelings (Rationalizer); Angry too often (Blamer). For too long, I have placed my job above my family and my health.

______________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________

I Choose a Green Story-

line

Examples: I use a strength from an adjacent personality to enhance my effectiveness; I can improve my health with attention to exercise and eating. I can fully meet both my family and work obligations by appropriately focusing on each.

______________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________

I State My Commitments

to Myself

Example: I am only 40% Committed to health excellence, and am 100% committed to doing better. I am 100% Committed to leaving my wife and children a legacy of love and respect. I want to be remembered for my character and the way I treat people. ______________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________

I State My Commitments to My Family

Example: I am 100 % Committed to providing quality time and attention to my family. I am 50% Committed to supporting my in-laws, as we do not like each other. ______________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________

I State My Commitments to My Work

Example: I am 100 % Committed to success of both this institution and this specific activity. I am 70% Committed to the success of my current supervisor because he treats us unfairly.

______________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________

267

Takeaways – Creativity

Commit to Addressing Unpleasant Realities with Mindsets of Optimism and 100% Commitment, as

…so, sustain an Fifth Force that stimulates your Creativity


One life is all we have…

Eliminating Drama Can Sustain a Context of

Response-ability

Steve Karpman’sDrama Triangle

(1968)

Victim

Rescuer Persecutor

Rationalizer

Blamer

Context ofResponse-ably

Directed Energy

ResistingBlaming &

Complaining

#29 - Drama - I

The 4-D System

269







Logical Need #2:Response-ability

270

Four Ways “We Mount the Stage”

4. Blamer2. Rescuer

3. Rationalizer1. Victim“There’s

nothing I can do.”

(Then you do nothing)

“I must do it!”(Which you soon

regret)

“It really doesn’t matter.”

(Fatigued – from repressing

uncomfortable feelings)

“It’s their fault.”

(When it’s actually your

fault)

271

Let’s Complain!

We all easily generate complaints.

Write a short

note (A Noun & a

Verb)

Never complain? Write the

complaints of “someone you

know.”

E.G. – My boss

doesn’t listen to

me

272

Who’s Response–able?

When does Response–ability begin?

Response–ability begins when we each decide to take it.

When we take it!Who’s Response–able for these complaints?

Who’s responsible for the $20 bill being on the

table?

When we try to avoid responsibility for our behavior by assigning our response-ability to some other entity, we give our power to

that entity. – M. Scott Peck

273

Never Complain Again (1)

Ask for it!

274

Never Complain Again (2)

3) Embrace reality; Propose an

appealing outcome

1) Authentically Appreciate; Address

Shared Interests2)

Include/collaborate; Make Agreements you can (will) keep

4) Free of Drama;

Ask for it!

We grant requests because returns are assumed (reciprocity)

One caveat – never ask for something they can’t give you.

Turn your complaints into requests or, forget about them.

275

The Victim Mindset

Sad–group (e.g.

helpless).

“Clubbing” with sympathetic others reduces discomfort.

Emotions Thoughts

“It’s being done to me. There’s nothing I can

do.” “Sad” is relieved.

Benefits:Eliminates the need for

action.Helplessness is acceptable.

Feels OK with club members.

Costs:No power, no action, No

Outcome.All requests sound like whining.Need to recruit club members.

“BMC” (Bitch, Moan,

Complain)

“Club” members’ validation further

reduces “sad.”

276

Joe Vs. the Volcano

Victim–Blamer “dance” & feeling

lousy

I’m Saved! but…

“It will always be something…

284

Escaping the Victim Mindset

Slow down, Notice and name your feelings:

Notice, name (color) then shift your Red power–robbing Story–lines.

We all engage in light, recreational complaining.

This is OK if you do not go to Victim, limiting your ability–to respond.

The Inquiry: Do I want more of this?

A business executive’s Story–line shift, “They will never change” to “If we don’t send the letter, we’ll

never know.”

#30 - Drama - II

Notice the word “never,”common drama language

285

Love–group (e.g. yearning for

approval/validation).

“I should not have done it…”

Costs:Chronic overwork stress.

Inappropriate relationship.Feel “used” by others.

Emotions Thoughts

Benefits:Get to feel needed.

Plenty of Blamers to help.Avoid having to say “no.”

Exhausted feel used and

move to blamer.

The Hero/Rescuer Mindset

Emotions Thoughts“I want to do it.”(Then they do it)

286

Exiting the Hero/Rescuer Mindset

Do I want more of this?– First, buy a little time, “Could you let

me think about this? I’ll get back to you soon.”

– Then, say “NO” 4–Dimensionally.Appreciate

Person and/or situation; Speak to shared interests

Be Inclusive; State Commitment to

Integrity

State (unpleasant) reality;

Optimistic Outcome& CommitmentFree of Drama,

(Expressing “glad”);Ask for it

Saying “NO” 4-D avoids power struggles.

287

Your Drama State Experiences, WB P. 15

1. Victim – Have you ever: Felt feelings of helplessness? Run a Story-line like, “There’s nothing I can do?” Then, feeling relieved, prove it by doing nothing? Recalling a time when you were in the Victim state (we

all have been here), what was the situation and what was it like? _______

Exit Strategy: Turn your complaints into requests, or forget about them.2. Rescuer – Have you ever: Felt a deep yearning to please, or be liked by others; Run a Story-line like, “Sure, I’ll do it,” when you

shouldn’t? Then, feeling burdened, become frustrated (angry)

that you have more to do than you possibly can? Recalling a time when you were in the Rescuer state,

what was the situation and what was it like? ______________________________

Exit Strategy: Buy some time, consider consequences, and then say “no” Four-dimensionally.

288

The Rationalizer Mindset

Fear–group (e.g. anxiety).

“It doesn’t really matter” to

repress emotions again.

“It doesn’t really matter.”

Temporary relief, then anxiety

returns.

Emotions Thoughts

It Doesn’t Really Matter

Benefits:Repress uncomfortable feelings.

Feels intellectually satisfying.Seems better than the

alternative.

Costs:Relief is temporary.

Energy is stuck up “in your head.”

Distracting and exhausting.“Feelings that are buried alive stay alive.”

– Stephen Covey“Feelings that are buried alive stay alive.”

– Stephen Covey

289

Is This the Hill You Want to Die On?

Anyone can become angry – that is easy But to become angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose,

and in the right way…This is not easy

“...those with high scores on a test of

hostility…were seven times as likely to

have died by the age of fifty”

> + +

Anger

290

Mad group (a “cover–up”

emotion)

“It’s your fault!”

The Blamer Mindset

Scared group (e.g. fear of

being blamed)

“I need to punish you.”

Emotions Thoughts

Benefits:Repress your fear.

Feel temporarily powerful.Enjoy energy from adrenalin

rush.

Costs:When fear returns, you must

recycle.Massive Emotional–side

Withdrawals.Your hostility can kill you.

291

The Blamer State & Escaping

Adrenalineaddiction

Your assignment of blame

is both clear and

wrong

Freud – Blamer is self–anger directed outward

I wonder what my

role was in creating

this mess?

Experience & Escape

292

The “Discover Your Role Two–Step”

Wondering about my role…

This experiential, whole body process reliably exits the toxic Blamer state.

Blaming or Complaining

293

Your Drama State Experiences, WB P. 15

3. Rationalizer – Have you ever: Felt uncomfortable feelings that you (unconsciously)

repressed; Run a Story-line like, “It doesn’t really matter” (when it

does)? Then, feeling better, only to find the discomfort soon

returned? Recalling a time when you were in the Rationalizer

state, what was the situation and what was it like? ____________________

Exit Strategy: Slow down, (belly) breathe into your emotions and process your Story-lines with a friend or your coach.4. Blamer – Have you ever: Felt afraid that you are going to be blamed for the

"mess;” Run a Story-line like, “It’s your fault,” using “mad-

group” emotions to “cover up” your uncomfortable “scared” feelings;

Then, feeling burdened, become frustrated (angry) that you have more to do than you possibly can?

Recalling a time when you were in the Blamer state, what was the situation and what was it like? ______________________________

Exit Strategy: Find and own your role in “creating the mess.”

294

Takeaways – Drama

Drama–states create contexts of:


Helplessness (Victims)

People Users

(Rescuers)

Denial(Rationalizer

s)

Hostility(Blamers)

When the Fifth Force (context) you need is Response-ability

Clarifying Roles, Accountability, & Authority (RAAs) Creates a Fifth

Force of Achievable Accountability

Context with Clear and Achievable

Expectations

Clarifying Roles, Accountability

& Authority

#31 - Accountability

296

Roles, Accountability, & Authority

Roles = Your function in your work (team, family)

context, e.g. goalie, quarterback

Accountability = The results you and others expect you to deliver,

e.g. play to win the game.

Authority = Power granted to you by others,

e.g. direct the other players

297

RAA Failure Mode #1

Metaphor: Exhausted

youngsters soccer team, as everybody

chases the ball

Lack of RAA Discipline

Work: Exhausted workers from over–inclusion, e.g. too

much time in meetings

Remedy: RAA discipline and tightly managed meetings

298

RAA Failure Mode #2

Metaphor: Sports players in Blamer–state, instead of

assuming Accountability

Lack of Team–level Accountability

Work: Blaming others for problems instead of assuming

Accountability

Remedy: Assume Accountability for

“whatever it takes” for team success

299

Set–up: Apollo 1 – A cabin fire during a launch pad test on January 27, 1967 at Launch Pad 34 at Cape Canaveral killed

all three crew members.

Gene Kranz gathers his team at Mission Control in Houston to discuss

Accountability.

The Apollo 1 Fire

302

RAA Worksheet WB, P. 16Your Name: _________________________Your Supervisor:____________________________

Describe your Accountability, the results you are to deliver.(For example, I lead the project and meet Level I requirements budget, and schedule. Another – I am accountable for assuring that adequate new business flows into our company.)Describe your Role, your functions in your team context. (For example, I am the Project Manager. Another – I am the Marketing Manager.) Describe your delegated Authority, the power granted to you by others. (For example, I direct the project’s workforce within the Level I requirements envelope, and applicable institutional requirements. Another – I provide strategic and tactical guidance to our marketing team.) My authority is sufficient? Yes ____ No ____(If your authority is inadequate, you must engage your supervisor.) I own and maintain the following processes:(For example, “Project monthly reporting process. Another – I own our operational marketing processes.) I use and comply with the following (institutional) processes: (For example, “Flight Project Practices,” “Engineering Golden Rules.” Another – Our Company’s “Marketing Manual”)

303

Processes with Expert Owners

All organizations use processes – otherwise they could not do

anything

Write processes that your team should assign

“owners” for on a 3x5 card.

Designate expert “process owners” –

optimize & promulgate

304

Dakota Tribal Wisdom

Use a stronger whip.

Appoint a committee to study the horse.

Visit other teams to see how they ride dead horses.

Hire contractors to ride the dead horse.

Request additional funding to increase the horse's performance.

Revisit the performance requirements for horses.

Promote the dead horse to a supervisory position.

When Indians discover they’re riding a dead horse they take response–able

action and dismount. We often try other strategies, like:

305

Takeaways – RAAs

Lack of clarity about your (and others) RAAs is not OK,

because this Fifth Force limits AccountabilityAnd, it’s so easy to fix. (Consider a ~one-day RAA

Workshop)Comments or Questions before we move on?

The Context Shifting Worksheet

“You cannot solve a problem with the level of thinking that created

it.”

#32 - Context Shifting Worksheet

“You cannot solve a problem in the context that created it.”

307

Is Your Attention Stuck in “S?”

Stuck in “S”

1) Appreciate; Address your

shared interests.2)

Appropriately include; Keep

all your agreements.

3) Create, from reality

& 100% Commitment4) Free of drama, Ask

for what you want!

Shift the Context Solution Appears

2nd Chair distributes CSW

308

Now, Select an Elephant to Process

1) Form into small groups and select a

spokesperson

5) Present to your larger

team

4) Vote to elect top three or

four

6) All select one to process

2) Invite eachto advocate a few

elephants

3) Give everyone

a chance to speak

310

CSW Post-workshop

The Context Shifting Worksheet (“CSW”) is a Fifth Force tool for People; Performance; Relationships…

1. Takes an hour or two;2. Easy to facilitate, just ask the questions; and3. Expands your thinking & alters your

perspectives.

311

“Mitigating Workshop Decay”

You must re–stimulate this learning, until the eight behaviors become habitual (~2 years),

because these behaviors are invaluable.Brain Rules: We forget 90% of what we

learn in a University class within 30 days.

#33 - Mitigate Workshop Decay

312

Reality – the Forgetting Curve

Within a week, without review, we forget >90%

of what we learn – Hermann Ebbinghaus

(1895)

Repetition to learn

the Times–table

Pearlman –

Repetition, practice – 5 hours per day

Every top team and athlete

practices

313

Repetition on Three Time Scales

Choose a 4-D“Czar”-Track TDA actions;

discuss at staff meetings

Re-TDA, 4%

boost per

cycleRe-

workshop, a two or

three-day event

Coaching, boost

0.4% per

session

- Must Express?













BottomQuintile

< Ave.Quintile

AverageQuintile

> Ave.Quintile

TopQuintile

53% 66% 70% 75%

66% 71% 76% 80%

72% 75% 79% 83%

77% 81%

84% 90%

All 198 teams with multiple assessments (2008)Average ~4% Enhancement / TDA cycle

+7%/TDA

+5%/TDA

+4%/TDA

+2%/TDA

+2%/TDA

+13% +4% +5%

.... ....... .. .. ..... .. ..

Re-IDA attention to your

behaviors

314

WillingCollaboration

Reality-basedOptimism

Appreciation,Openness

100%Commitment

High Trust-worthiness

EffectiveInclusion

Organization(Accountable)

Response-ability

IncessantCriticism

UnrelentingConflict

Isolation,Anger

NoTrust

BlindOptimism

NoCommitment

Drama(Victim)

No Account-ability

Bottom and Top Quintile Teams

315

TDAs Drive Performance Enhancement

BottomQuintile

< Ave.Quintile

AverageQuintile

> Ave.Quintile

TopQuintile

53% 66% 70% 75%

66% 71% 76% 80%

72% 75% 79% 83%

77% 81%

84% 90%

All 198 teams with multiple assessments (2008)

Average ~4% Enhancement / TDA cycle

+7%/TDA

+5%/TDA

+4%/TDA

+2%/TDA

+2%/TDA

+13% +4% +5%

316

Bottom Ave. Top

>

Ave.

<

Ave.

57%

68%

72%

81%

6/07

9/07

4/08

6/09

Real “ABC” Team Data Lloyds of London

SOEs-ChinaEDF-France Mines - Malaysia

How do TDAs Work?

On-lineSegment

Why? Case Studies

What’s good Repetition

Leader’s

Briefing

Next TDA?

Responsible Action DueSmith, John Implement an

Appreciation Enhancement

System

6/28/2012

Workshop?

Behavior-specific actions?

317

Our Closure

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can

change the world.Indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.

– Margaret Mead, Anthropologist

Your team leader’s closure is up next.

Please rate your

workshop in a scale of

“1” to “10” (great)

Eval card

And a final,

overall

318

Your Team Leader’s Takeaways

Observations, and actions going

forward

measuring and managing the social context of teams

Business

workshop agreements

emotions advance progress

challenges social contexts

ida attention

intellectual response

progress mindsetsattitudes

desired outcome

go2nd chair writes agreement