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May / june 2011 iyar / sivan 5771

Building Torat Yisraels Future

Progress on Two Significant Processes

I. Our Search For an Education Director

Under the leadership of Barbara Karetny, chair of Torat Yisrael's Personnel Committee and RachelSilverman, Chair of Torat Yisrael's School Committee, our open Education Director position has beenpublicized in both Rhode Island and southern Massachusetts. The ad describing the position indicatedthat successful candidates should have training in education and/or Judaic studies and should haveteaching and/or educational administrative experience. Five candidates have expressed interest inthis position. A search committee comprised of members of the Personnel Committee, the SchoolCommittee, Susan Smoller and Rabbi Levin was formed. A preparatory meeting clarified the qualities

we are looking for in our new Education Director and questions designed to provide candidates with the opportunity topresent those qualities to the search committee were prepared. At this writing, in mid-April, the interview processhas begun and the field of candidates has been narrowed down. At least one candidate will be invited to visit our

school, meet our parents, faculty and students and sit with the committee for a second interview. We look forward tointroducing Torat Yisrael's new Education Director to our congregational community and to the greater Rhode IslandJewish community later in the spring.

II. Building in East GreenwichOn April 7th the Building Committee, led by the committee's chairman, Andrew Sholes, opened bids from 14construction companies. The committee compared the bids submitted by the companies and narrowed the field to ahandful of the most promising proposals. Companies whose bids are not being considered have been notified.Negotiations have opened with the remaining companies in the hopes of coming up with a plan and a fee structurethat will satisfy the company and meet our needs. The Building Committee is meeting in mid-May to compare therevised bids.The question of the hour is, of course: when will we start to build? There are a number of factors that will go intosetting that date: we need to settle on a satisfactory agreement with one company, we need to draw up and sign theappropriate contractual documents. The company we ultimately engage will need to indicate when they are available

to begin work on our project taking into consideration the projects they already have in hand. We will need to applyfor and receive the appropriate bulding permits from the Town of East Greenwich. Cash flow is always a considerationat this stage of a project. Those of you who have made pledges to our Capital Campaign are asked to continue tomake payments in fulfillment of your pledges as soon as that is possible for you.An additional pending issue for Torat Yisrael is the sale of our current building. As of this writing, we have received noformal offer on our building. There are a few organizations that have expressed serious interest and have visited our

building a number of times. We are hopeful that we will receive a substantial offer in the coming months.

III. Congregational Approvals

Both the sale of an asset of our congregation, like our Cranston building, and the start of our actual building process,represent major decisions for Torat Yisrael that can only be made by the members of the congregation. As thegroundwork for each of these issues is completed, they will each be brought to a congregational meeting for themembers' consideration and vote

Greetings from Susan Smoller, President

Shalom Fellow Congregants,

I hope you enjoyed a healthy Passoverand enjoyed the once-a-year Passoverfood and treats.

As we know, Ronni Guttin will beending her career as our Educational

Director this year in order to allow her time to dedicateto her other career as Camp Director of JORI and to

her family. I hope that many of you will join me inwishing her well and also at the graduation of ourCohen Religious School graduates, the morning of May22. This celebration and reluctant farewell will takeplace at the Cohen Religious School campus at theVillage Lower School at 2220 South County Trail inEast Greenwich. The event will begin at 9am andrefreshments will be served.The Membership Committee, under the Chair of BethSalk and Michael Field, has arranged for an open house

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on June 12. This will take place both at the school andat the house in East Greenwich. Please talk to yourfamilies and friends and invite them to join us thatmorning to find out more about joining the ToratYisrael family. It would be great to expand our familyto include more congregants who can also enjoy allthat we have to offer.

As the weather improves and I am outside more, Ihope to see you in my travels!

Please contact me at any time with any comments orquestions.

BShalom,Susan

Kesher Corner: Andrea Epstein, LICSW

Andrea serves Torat Yisraels members through Kesher, a joint project of the Jewish Alliance of GreaterRhode Island, the Bernhardt Foundation, and Jewish Family Service. She can be reached at (401)

369-0160 orandrea@toratyisrael.org.

Good Grief

Once again Torat Yisrael members have provided mewith a great idea for a Kesher column: Grief. Almostall of us will experience grief at some point in our lives.It often brings people together and yet, I think most ofus would acknowledge that grieving is a very personalexperience. Understanding more about grief and thegrieving process may help us be supportive ofourselves and of one another when the death of a

loved one occurs.Stages of grief were first described by death and griefpioneer Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, M.D. in the late 1960s.This opened a nationwide conversation into the largelytaboo topic at the time about death and dying. Whilethe stages were not meant to be chronological, theygave many mourners a way to talk about theirexperiences and benchmarks within their process. Thestages, as outlined by Kubler Ross are: denial, anger,bargaining (for a different outcome), depression, andacceptance. Interestingly what is becoming clear fromcurrent trends in research is that the five stage modelmay not be the most accurate way to look at thegrieving process.

Recent research by George A. Bonanno, Ph.D.indicates that grief is not only highly personal but it ishighly variable. We do not all grieve the same way.Dr. Bonanno admits that it may be comforting formourners to have clearly delineated stages. In hiswriting on the topic though, he speaks about findingsthat indicate that the vast majority of the populationexhibit enormous resilience in their grieving process.

He speaks specifically to the idea that there is not a"normal" way to grieve and that, in fact, sadness isoften intermingled with feeling fine. Substantialfluctuations between the two states were noted aswell. One of the more surprising findings was the

unexpected feelings of joy reported by those who werealso grieving.

These findings on positive emotions among thegrieving are echoed as well in the work of CamilleWortman, Ph.D. She points out that both positive andnegative emotions can exist side by side and thatpositive emotions like gratitude, pride, hope and loveare especially important in helping to balance outfeelings like depression, anxiety, anger, and guilt thatthose who are grieving may experience. Additionally,

Dr. Wortman found that positive emotions givemourners respite and time to recharge. She sites twoways that positive emotions can possibly be enhancedfor mourners: engagement in activity (even for ashort while) and focusing on what matters in thepresent.

These findings certainly give weight to the idea ofletting people mourn the way they need to- even if itdoesnt look like one might expect. Knowing thatengaging in activity, especially enjoyable activity,lends a possible road map to those in mourning andthose wanting to support those in mourning. This newresearch can give us something to aim for andremoves judgment from the grieving process.

Please note that Dr. Bonanno also describes a minorityof mourners who have either prolonged grief- anextreme and lengthy grieving process, or exhibit arecovery pattern- intense initial grief followed byacting like they did before the loss but feeling hurtindefinitely. If either of these describes you orsomeone who care about please understand thatfurther assessment and intervention may be indicated.

If you have concerns, questions, or just want to talkabout mourning I am available CONFIDENTIALLYthrough the Kesher program: Andrea Epstein, LICSW(401) 369-0160 or andrea@templetorat.org. Ideasfor newsletters are always appreciated!

Please note as well that Temple Torat Yisrael has anongoing Bereavement Discussion Group on alternateThursday evenings that is open to both members andnon-members.

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The Cohen School News

Dear Torat Yisrael Families:

At this time of year, we welcome thespringtime, mark the changes in theearth, gather together as families tocelebrate, and mark lifestyle changes likecommencement and promotions to newgrades and new schools. At the Cohen

School, we have just celebrated our first student thisyear becoming a Bar Mitzvah and are preparing forreligious school graduation as we honor 3 graduatesfrom our school, Aaron Tessier, Elijah Coke, andJessica Beckenstein. Graduation will take place on May22nd as part of our Lag B'Omer celebration at TheVillage Lower School. We look forward to celebratingwith all of you.

At this time of year, other transitions also take place.It is my turn to express a huge thank you to the CohenSchool families and to the entire Torat Yisraelcommunity. I am honored to have been a part of the

Cohen School for my entire adult life. My career inJewish Education began more than 30 years ago as a

teacher at Temple Torat Yisrael. My husband and Iwere married at Torat Yisrael, and my children were alleducated in The Cohen School.As this school yearcomes to a close, I thank our Torat Yisrael family forallowing me to join you in the education of ourchildren, and for the privilege of being a part of TheCohen School community. As the school has grown, itdeserves a leader who has the time to bring it to it'spotential. My career in Jewish education began atTemple Torat Yisrael and built the foundation for myprofessional present and future. As the executivedirector of Camp JORI, I use the skills I have learnedwith all of you, and continue to hone my abilities. Ilook forward to sharing the continuing maturity of yourchildren as they progress through The Cohen School.With affection, Ronni

Librarians Corner by Laura Steele, Torat Yisrael LibrarianThe Free World: A Novelwritten by David Bezmozgis has been highlighted as a must read by Barnes and Noble. This

is a family saga in which one daughter, Polina, has left her devoted, upright husband for Alec, a smooth-talkingwomanizer now eyeing a teenage girl. Responsible older brother Karl has big dreams but helps the family survive bygetting involved in a shady business. Family patriarch Samuil, who still mourns a brother lost in World War II, remainsfirmly secular even as his wife drifts toward the familys Jewish heritage. Sounds like your typical family problems, butthe Krasnanskys are Soviet Jews who have fled to the West (its 1978), and the miracle of this debut novel is howeffectively Bezmozgis (Natasha: And Other Stories) captures both the familys recognizable tensions and the particulardifficulties of the Soviet migr experience. Staunch Communist Samuil, for instance, contravened his convictions toemigrate and remain with his family, while Polina will never see hers again. Having opted not to go to Israel, theKrasnanskys find themselves in Rome, struggling to arrange visas to the United States or Canada. Bezmozgis fillstheir wait with carefully nuanced anguish and hope. Bezmozgis proves why he was recently proclaimed one of TheNew Yorkers 20 Under 40; this is mellifluous, utterly captivating writing, and youll live with the Krasnansky family asif it were your own. This is a highly recommended new read. Enjoy!!!

Make Your Donations to Torat Yisrael On Line!

Supporting our Torat Yisrael community has become easier than ever. Youll find a link to a Donations page on themain menu on our Torat Yisrael website (www.toratyisrael.org). The links on the donation page will take you to thesecure www.justgive.org website. When you open a free account with Just Give you will be able to donate to ToratYisrael on line and you will also receive an on line receipt for every donation you make as well as an end of the yearsummary of all the charitable donations you have made to Torat Yisrael during the course of the year to make yourtax preparation easier.

College Scholarships for Students Who Are Rhode Island Residents

The National Council of Jewish Women, RI section will be awarding scholarships to students attending college in thefall of 2011 who are RI residents.Grants will be awarded based on evidence of involvement in community service, academic worthiness and financialneed. Students desiring applications should write to Estelle Fradin, 130 Deerfield Road, Cranston RI 02920 or call(401) 942-4486. The deadline for requesting applications is May 18, 2011

In Our TY Family

Mazal tov to everyone celebrating a Birthday in May!Laura Kavanagh, Ronitte Vilker, Riley Miller, Samuel Bresky, Joshua Hill, David Wasser, Stacey Weisman,

Carlos Goncalves, Ellen Golden, Lynn Field, Sarah Steele, Joel Westerman, Alan Field, Michael Field,

Harvey Rappoport, Leon Resnick, Ilene Bojar, Ethan Kaplan, Zachary Kaplan, Frank Kosofsky, Barry

Gilstein, Susan Smoller, Jennifer Berman, Jeffrey Salk, Pearl Gorden, Marc Davis, Charles Ziegler,

Lawrence Wacks and Ronni Peltz

Mazal tov to everyone celebrating an Anniversary in May!

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Robert & Laura Sidman (21 years), Michael & Sharon Field (37 years), Barry & Ellen Golden (23 years),

Nathan & Martha Lury (61 years), Jeffrey & Joan Bookbinder (12 years), James & Sylvia Shocket (70years) and Jeffrey & Cynthia Davis (30 years)

Mazal tov to Josh Greenberg, son of Diane Greenberg, on being recognized at the Providence College vs. NotreDame basketball game at the Dunkin Donut Center for his years of volunteer service to the PC Athletic Department!Josh was awarded a 11 PC jersey for his graduation year!

Mazal tov to Geoffrey and Katy Claussen on their birth of their new daughter, Talya Adele!! Talya was born onMarch 16th weighing in at 8 lbs., 7 oz. She has a proud big sister, Eliana! Congratulations to all!

Mazal tov to Eddye Golden who will be attending Emory University in Atlanta this coming academic year. Eddye has

been a much loved teachers assistant at our Cohen Religious School the last two years and we know that ourstudents are going to miss her very much.

May God who blessed our ancestors, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah, bring

blessing and healing to: Trude Antin, Pearl Gorden, Douglas & Barbara Greenberg (Diane Greenbergsbrother-in-law & sister-in-law), Myer Grossman, Harriet Landesberg, Bonnie Lury, Morton Paige, Zenas & SaraPulner, Ron Richter, Harold & Sylvia Roggen (Barbara Karetnys parents), Louis Russian, Sylvia & JimmyShocket, Steve Tragar, Moe Wine and Eileen Winkler (Rochelle Zieglers mother)

An Open Letter from Marcia Slobin and Family

Dear Temple Torat Yisrael Family,

We want to thank everyone for your support on the loss of our father Myron Slobin. The outpouring of people at thefuneral, the beautiful job that Rabbi Levin did at the funeral and the Shiva was enormous. Marcia was afraid of beingalone the third night for we both had to go back home and thanks to your Torat Yisrael community Marcia was not

alone. We felt that we had an extended family through the Torat Yisrael. TY may be a small congregation but you arecertainly a family and an extended community in a time of need.

On a personal note, Marcia would like to thank everyone for the continued support.

Shalom,

Marcia, Neal, and Wendy (children of Myron Slobin)

Temple Torat Yisrael Email Addresses, Facebook and Twitter

Rabbi Amy Levin: rabbi@toratyisrael.org Hazzan Devin Goldenberg: hazzan@toratyisrael.orgSusan Smoller, President: president@toratyisrael.org Ronni Guttin, Education Director: ronni@toratyisrael.orgAndrea Epstein, Social Worker: andrea@toratyisrael.org Anita Olinsky (Dues Committee): dues@toratyisrael.orgwelcome@toratyisrael.org - Michael Field/Beth Salk (Membership Committee Chairs)facebook@toratyisrael.org twitter@toratyisrael.org and @ravlevin

Sheryl Ponder, Bookkeeper/Office Manager: sheryl@toratyisrael.orgStephanie Reinsant, Rabbis Secretary: stephanie@toratyisrael.org

Hug Nhamah: Circle of ConsolationA Bereavement Discussion Group meeting on alternate Thursday evenings at 7:30 pm providing asupportive circle to bring the emotional and spiritual challenges of grief. Facilitated by Torat Yisraelmember, Dr. Judith Lubiner, a licensed psychologist, and Rabbi Amy Levin. TY members and non-members

equally welcome. Meeting May 12th and 26th and June 16th and 30th.

Knit and Kvetch in East Greenwich

Join Temple Torat Yisraels knitting circle from 9:00 am 12:00 pm- East Greenwich (Village Lower School): May 22nd

Share your knowledge of knitting, crocheting, embroidering and needle-pointing. For more information, pleasecontact Lynn Field (lmfield593@gmail.com) or Beverly Goncalves (bevsue66@verizon.net).

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Shabbat in East Greenwich:

Friday Evening:, Shabbat Yachad: Guest Speaker: John Torgan, Save the Bay

Friday, May 6th: Services at 6:00 pm. Dinner and speaker at 7:00 pm. Cost: $10 adult / $5 child 10-18 /Children under 10 Free / Family maximum $30. Please RSVP to the TY office; 785-1800 /Stephanie@toratyisrael.org.

Saturday, May 7th

: Shabbat Services at 9:15 am.

Shavuot Pie and Cake Sale

The Sisterhood is having a Pie & Cake Sale! All items are Kosher Dairy. Proceeds to benefit the Capital Campaign andSocial Action Activities. Order deadline is Tuesday, May 10th. Pick up in both Cranston and East Greenwich locationson Sunday, June 5th. For more information please contact Beverly Goncalves at 714-9297.

Shalom to Shabbat: Unwind and Nosh Before Shabbat Services in

Cranston

Friday, May 13th, 7:00 pm: wine, cheese and a nice schmooze before our 7:30 pm Shabbat Service.

Our May Topic: God in our Lives: Illness and Healing

East Greenwich: Tuesday, May 17th

12:00-1:30 p.m. Lunch & Learn at Ts Restaurant, 5600 Post Road (in the Bennys Plaza), EastGreenwich each participant orders from the menu and we study Jewish sources addressing current

issues. Everyone is welcome, bring a friend!

Cranston/Warwick: Thursday, May 19th

12:00-1:30 p.m. Lunch & Learn at the Cozy Grill Restaurant, 440 Warwick Avenue, Warwick each participant

orders from the menu as we study Jewish sources. Everyone is welcome, bring a friend! Look for us in the backroom!

East Greenwich Shabbat: May 20-21Friday 6:00 pm early Shabbat Service for all. Enjoy an early Shabbat service and then arrange for a relaxedShabbat meal at home with your family and friends.

Saturday, May 21st at 10:00 am. Shabbat Family Experience: 10 am interactive service; 11:00 am family-friendlyKiddush lunch immediately following.

Schmooze with Booze: Our May topic: Jews and Animals: Domination and

CompassionAn opportunity for informal study and discussion with Rabbi Amy Levin over wine, beer, something softer, some goodmunchies and an interesting topic.

Wednesday evening, May 25th from 7:00 pm 8:30 pm at our East Greenwich house to schmooze with booze!

Shabbat in East Greenwich:

Friday Evening:, Shabbat Yachad: Guest Speaker: Our Own Meredith Karetny! Speaking

about her work in the David Project. a non-profit organization dedicated to educating and inspiring

strong voices for Israel through dynamic educational seminars, workshops, and curricula. Friday, June 3rd: Services at 6:00 pm. Dinner and speaker at 7:00 pm. Cost: $10 adult / $5 child 10-18 /Children under 10 Free / Family maximum $30. Please RSVP to the TY office by May 31st; 785-1800 /Stephanie@toratyisrael.org.

Saturday, June 4th

: Shabbat Services at 9:15 am.

Mens Club & Sisterhood Brunch

On Sunday, June 5th, the Mens Club and the Sisterhood will host a free brunch at 10:00 am at the temple inCranston. There will be food and Rabbi Levin will teach us about Kabballah. We hope you will join us there. Therewill be a morning prayer service that day at 9:30 am. Please call in your plans to attend the brunch to 785-1800 sowe may cater appropriately.

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ShavuotTuesday, June 7 / 5 Sivan: Dedication of our new High Holiday Prayer Book, Mahzor Lev Shalem, and DessertReception in honor of the Sholes Family. Tikkun Leil Shavuot Study session will highlight text and music based on ournew mahzor. Rabbi Levin and Hazzan Goldenberg will lead services and teach following the dessert reception. 7:30pm Shavuot Service followed by dairy dessert break and Tikkun Leil Shavuot.Thursday, June 9 / 7 Sivan: 9:00 am Shavuot and Yizkor Service

Shalom to Shabbat: Unwind and Nosh Before Shabbat Services in

Cranston

Friday, June 10th, 7:00 pm: wine, cheese and a nice schmooze before our 7:30 pm Shabbat Service.

Open House in East Greenwich

Young families and empty-nesters, partners and singles, one-faith and interfaith: You have a place in our community!Membership is having an open on Sunday, June 12 th from 10:00 am 12:00 pm at both of our East Greenwichvenues: The Village Lower School, 2220 South County Trail and our future synagogue site: 1251 Middle Road.(At the open house at the Village Lower School we will be working on a group project to help those in the communitywho are in need).

East Greenwich Shabbat: June 17-18

Friday 6:00 pm early Shabbat Service for all. Enjoy an early Shabbat service and then arrange for a relaxed Shabbatmeal at home with your family and friends.Saturday, June 18th at 10:00 am. (1 hour interactive learning service)

Our June Topic: Jewish Accessories: The Back Story of Tallit, Kippah and

Tefillin

East Greenwich: Tuesday, June 21st

12:00-1:30 p.m. Lunch & Learn at Ts Restaurant, 5600 Post Road (in the Bennys Plaza), EastGreenwich each participant orders from the menu and we study Jewish sources addressing current issues. Everyoneis welcome, bring a friend!

Cranston/Warwick: Thursday, June 23rd

12:00-1:30 p.m. Lunch & Learn at the Cozy Grill Restaurant, 440 Warwick Avenue, Warwick each participantorders from the menu as we study Jewish sources. Everyone is welcome, bring a friend! Look for us in the backroom!

Thank you, Torat Yisrael Volunteers! Weve got a special Shabbat just

for you!Our Torat Yisrael Family will come together on Friday evening, June 24th at 7:30 pm to celebrate our huge cadre ofvolunteers. Festive Oneg Shabbat to follow services.

Youve planned great programs, run great services, produced great printed materials, taken care of our finances andour land purchase, youve helped us donate food and blood, youve fed us and entertained us, youve nurtured ourchildren and helped our office run smoothly, youve stuffed envelopes and set tables . . . and more! Now wereinviting you to an evening of appreciation. This is an evening for all of us to enjoy: to appreciate and to beappreciated.

Annual Congregational Meeting

Please join us for our annual congregational meeting on Tuesday, June 28 th. Refreshments will be served at6:30 pm and we will start the meeting at 7:00 pm. Everyones attendance is very important.

Schmooze with Booze: Our June Topic: Choosing Jewish: Conversion in

Judaism

An opportunity for informal study and discussion with Rabbi Amy Levin over wine, beer, something softer, some goodmunchies and an interesting topic.

Wednesday evening, June 29th from 7:00 pm 8:30 pm at our East Greenwich house to schmooze with booze!