managing self, tasks & relationship
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Welcome aboard
Guiding Factors:Participate & Learn
Check need & modify
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Branch & leavesVisible from distance / Fast Changing
TrunkVisible if we go Close / Slow Changing
ROOTInvisible / Very slow Changing
BehaviorVisible from Distance / Fast Changing
AttitudeVisible if we go Close / Slow Changing
ThoughtsInvisible / Very Slow Changing
Influenced from
EnvironmentI
Insight into Self
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Behavior ( External )Attitude
Thoughts ( Internal )
Higher the Gap More the Stress
I
Harmonize External & Internal Self
Frenemy NPN Oprecy Effectiveness
Convert :Activity Productivity Profitability Avoid waste/Practice austerity
I= KSA + GoalOrg. are vehicle to our goalsThey want us to modify quickly.
The story of the eagle…
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Relate Self with the Organization “I” is a bunch of roles made up of KSA + GOAL. (SMART & SWOT).
“I”–Role = Empty, Role–Personality (KSA)= Ineffective.
Goals help us to use KSA, be Productive, & Develop
Growth & Development help succeed in Changing Roles.
Organizations are Vehicles to our goals & must earn Profits. (O2)
Motivate Self: Manage your mind & strive for Goals.
Link Fear of loss & Hope of gain with Goal Achievement.
Quickly shift from “My Right” to the “Common Right”.
1. Lost his job2. Got defeated for legislature3. Started business and failed4. Wife died of a fatal disease5. Experienced nervous breakdown6. Contested in election for speaker in legislature and lost 7. Tried for nomination in a political party and lost8. Applied for post of land officer and didn’t get it9. Contested for senate and lost10. Contested for vice president and lost11. Again contested for senate and lost
AND TWO YEARS LATER…..
ABRAHAM LINCOLN
GOT ELECTED AS PRESIDENT OF AMERICA
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To Accomplish Tasks: Control Ego & Emotions
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S.N. CP NP FC LP AC Adult
1 Control & discipline.
Permission Spontaneous Initiative Obedient Objective
2 Has authority to direct
Inspires, delegates
Enthusiastic Synthesizing Disciplined Realistic, Logical
3 Judgmental Creates (+) stress
Humorous Pleasure seeking
Goes by haunches
Hard working Aware, Mature
4 Takes initiative & responsibility
Empathizes Happy intimateActive
Sensitive to non verbal signals
Cooperative Explores options. Listens andis flexible
5 Up holds values Protects and guides
Curious.Frank Natural
ImaginativeCreative
Respects superiors
Analysis, takes decisions
6 Helps and trusts
Imaginative. Energetic
Holistic. Insightful Manipulative
Traditional. Sincere. Supportive
Adapts to situations & Change
TA is to Understand behaviour & monitor Response irrespective of Stimulus
To complete Tasks: Manage Stimulus & respond well…
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To Accomplish Tasks: Withstand Pressure…
Be composed in the most stressful of situations & take objective decisions which are appropriate to the situation.
Effectively withstand the effects of prolonged exposure to one or few stressors by modifying work methods.
Maintain balance of mind & take right decisions despite regular stress.
Control Emotions/Irritation & respond constructively to the problem.
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To Complete Tasks: Execute Well…
Is the Art of “Getting things Done” . Is the Science: Inputs=> Processes=> out puts
Is the Bridge: “Promises & Results”-“Walk the Talk”
Use Head, Heart and Guts.
Is all about: Make it Happen v/s Let it Happen.
Know your job as well as your People.
Be realistic & conduct checks periodically. Reward & Reprimand people based on performance
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Important but not urgent
Neither Urgent Nor Important.
Urgent but not important.
Urgent and important.
Decide What to do & What not to do?
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Manage response irrespective of Stimulus.
To handle Stress: Practice Self Discipline (APA)
Manage Time to Utilize in first shot & Create from Q3.
Prioritize “What to do”& Decide “What not to do”
Be more Productive by remaining Goal directed.
Couple Hard Work with SMART Work.
Convert Let Things Happen to Make Things Happen
To Withstand Pressure: Practice Self Discipline…
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Have high Energy, & a pressing Goal.
Know the gap between Activity & Productivity.
Convert Energy & Edge into Action & Results.
Be Passionate about what you do.
Energy
(Face change)
Energize
(Spark others)
Edge
(Be competitive)
Execute
(Get results)
To Complete tasks: Display 4 Es…
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It’s Time to say…
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Recap: Day 1…
“I” is a bunch of roles with pre set Goals.
“I” – role = Empty & Role – I (Personality – KSA) is ineffective..
Organizations are vehicles to our Goals & want quick modification.
To Succeed accomplishment of tasks is a must.
Tasks accomplishment puts us under pressure.
Task completion needs effective Execution through Self Discipline.
To Accomplish tasks demonstrate 4 “Es”.
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Managers have to Achieve the Functional Goals.We Must Understand the policies of Top Mgt. & Follow them.
But at times We:
Strive to achieve our Goals in isolation & become Counter-Productive.
This creates Functional-Myopia.
At times We also start Acting Cross-Purposes.
Avoid being Counter Productive…
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To Succeed: Build Inter-Personal Effectiveness…
Perceive & respond with care to the internal states of the people, understand the antecedents of those states, & predict the subsequent events that will result.
Be accurate & appropriate in judging & responding to others.
Listen and see the merits of different viewpoints.
Show Care/Concern & Support team members to achieve goals.
Engage in effective, concise two–way personal communication.
Listen well & practice silence to help others generate views.
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Be Correct & Logical, to Connect well. Enhance size of Arena: By increasing Self Discloser. By Increasing Feedback.
With Customers: Make up deficiencies. With Close ones: Share mutual concerns.
Arena Blind Spot
Facade Unknown
What I don’t know about
myself
What I know about myself
What others know
about me
What others don’t know
about me
9%
16%
30%
45%
Communication
WritingReadingSpeakingListening
To relate well: Connect properly…
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Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to:
Perceive, control and evaluate emotions.
Identify, Use, Understand, Manage emotions in (+) & constructive way
Recognize own as well as others emotional states.
Emotional intelligence is also about engaging with others in ways that draw people to you.
What is Emotional Intelligence
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• IQ helps you to be successful to the extent of 20% only and the rest 80% of success depends on EQ.
80% EQ (feelings) 20% IQ(thinking)
Insight into variance between IQ & EQ
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Sr. No EQ IQ
1 It is largely learned& continues to develop as we go through life.
IQ changes little after our teen years.
2 Nowadays as average IQ is increasing the EI is declining Signs of it are rising rate of Despair , Crime, Violence, etc.
IQ determines whether you have innate abilities for it.
3 EQ is more relevant to success and happiness in life.
IQ is some thing you are born with.
4 EQ decided whether you are a team player & how well you will respond to a crisis
IQ decides y6our individual capacities & intelligence.
5 EQ measures the personal skills & power to use Emotions.
IQ refers to the analytical mathematical, & logical reasoning capabilities of a person
Visualize Emotional Intelligence
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See where from our emotions are controlled.
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Gut- feeling
Experience/Event /Person / object Amygdala
Chemical reaction in our body
Tightening of stomach muscles GUT FEELING
This doesn’t feel goodMore & more life
experiences strengthen GUT-FEELING
WISDOM
PREFRONTAL LOBES brings a sense of context &
appropriateness to Amygdala surges of passionate interest
Inhibitory impulses
TriggerNerve pathway
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Expressions of Emotions
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Watch the Impact of Low EI
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Low EQ: Your frank attitude at times create more enemies than friends. You just don’t know how to deal with people or issues & have a very short fuse.Your feelings control you rather then you controlling them. You must start today.
Average EQ: You do get into fights with your family friends & colleagues. You may feel insecure about your surroundings, family and job. Try to be stress-free & happy. Avoid negative thoughts. Learn to express yourself so that others can understand your problem and help you out.
Above Average EQ: You understand people’s emotions very well & care about it. But this doesn’t mean you forget your own needs & start listening to everyone. Learn to enjoy even mundane tasks & explore joy in all the small things in life. Keep our ideas about happiness, satisfaction and achievement very clear.
States of EQ
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High EQ: Your performance level is very high. But don’t let your work carry you away from understanding the true meaning of life. If you ignore this now, you will become immune to the small joys. Have a right balance of both to have a better quality of life. Outstanding EQ: You are in touch with your inner self. You understand what is needed in life to have the right balance. You have a very positive outlook and are very expressive. You are very confident and sure of yourself.
We can get better results at workplace, if we work on EI. But many of us don’t know how to perceive, understand, express & manage our emotions effectively.
Adverse impact of Low EI include: Relationship Problems. Rage in the
Workplace. Poor decision making capability and failure to advance in career.
States of EQ
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Impact of Low Emotional Intelligence
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• If only I had a different job .
• If only I had a different boss.
• If only I had been handsome/beautiful.
• If only I had been married someone else.
• If only my spouse had stopped cursing me.
Thought process of a low EQ person
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Impact of Low EI
Thoughts, Beliefs & Emotions have major impact on our Health.
Low Emotional Intelligence results in high stress level.High stress: Increases anxiety level. Hypertension. Progression of diabetes. Cardio-vascular diseases. Psycho-somatic diseases. Depression.
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• A time to be aggressive and a time to be passive.
• A time to wait and a time to watch.
• A time to be together and a time to be alone.
• A time to work and a time to play.
• A time to cry and a time to laugh.
Thought process of a High EQ person
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Advantages of High EI
•Increased Resilience.
•Ability to confront adverse conditions.
•Improved inter-personal relationship.
•Better Creativity in thought & action.
•Focus on & plan for future outcome.
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Emotional intelligence is the ability to: Perceive, control & evaluate emotions. Identify, Understand, Manage & Use emotions in (+) & constructive way Recognize own as well as others emotional states. EI is also about engaging with others in ways that draw people to you. Is knowing what feels good or bad & how to shift from Bad to Good. Steps to Improve EI1. Think about Emotions, Recognize them and Explore their cause.2. Ascertain if needs to be addressed. (All emotions need not be addressed) 3. Listen well & pick up Non verbal cues to handle others emotions better. (Eye
contact, Facial expression, Tone of voice, Posture & gesture ,Touch etc.)
4. Accept Conflict as part of life and work to Resolve it positively.5. Identify your stress, its causes & address the same through right means.
Practice Emotional Intelligence…
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When parties having Goal directed behavior, Dependence & find Variance between expected and actual behavior, Conflict emerges.
Conflicts are neither good nor bad, how we handle it sets its nature.
Understand, Accept & Handle Conflicts
Normal areas of Conflict at place of work:
Technical (e.g., design, analysis, results interpretation)
Political (who should have a say on what? who’s turf it is?)
Operational (how to do tasks, who is responsible?)
Emotional (ego involvement, hurt feelings)
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COLLABORATE BY
ASSE
RTIV
ENES
SU
nass
ertiv
eAs
serti
ve
Uncooperative CooperativeCOOPERATIVENESS
Competing
Compromising
Avoiding Accommodating
Collaborating
Good old lessons in teamworkfrom an age-old fable
The TortoiseAnd
The Hare
Handle Conflict & Collaborate
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As Supervisor: Make members accept
Don’t think that what you see is final.
Always be open to listen to other’s stand points also.
While you are right others can also be right.
Enjoy The Illusions
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IdeaNeed to express
Selection Of
receiver
Method receiver driven
Need of receiver
Avoid Gossip. (A=>B=>C)
Conversationalist. (A=>B=>B)
Avoid being a Bore. (A=>B=>A)
Communicate to make People: Understand, Accept & Act.
To make impact be receiver driven.
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Being in a “Group” remain prepared to:
Work more as compared to
working alone
Toning down use of
abilities
Carry the burden of
others
KSAWork groups are made of
people having
Common Goal
Good IPR
Communication
To Achieve Goals: Get well in teams…
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For Effective Relationship: follow six steps…
1. Create and maintain a bond even with your adversity
2. Establish a dialogue and negotiate
3. Put the fish on the table
4. Understand what causes conflict
5. Use law of reciprocity
6. Build a positive relationship
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To conclude refresh Key Learning
1. Know yourself. Set Goals to use KSA, be Productive & Develop self
2. Avoid Functional-Myopia & never work Cross Purposes.
3. Withstand Pressure & Manage Response.
4. Be Inter-personally effective.
5. Understand Conflict & face it Constructively.
6. Listen well & Allow for Silence to help others speak.
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It’s Time to say…
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To Accomplish tasks…
Use Head, Heart and Guts.
Head: Personal intelligence & competence.
Heart: Empathy & Understanding.
Gut: Self confidence sufficient to take the tough decisions.
Be fiercely competitive with love to Win & make Your Team Win.
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Maintain a team of people, as in-charge of your team members activities.
Use vested power & authority to:
Track every team member’s work to get desired result ensuring their safety, security & health.
Assign tasks to your people and ensure that work gets done in time as per the schedule.
At the end of the day, make your people report to you the work done on that particular day.
Gives instructions and/or orders to subordinates.
Be held responsible for the work & actions of other
employees.
To Accomplish Tasks: “Extract best from people”
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Must Know:
How to persuade other people.
How to peel away the layers of common practices.
How to over come the resistance to change.
How to manage environment better.
How to pursue on going improvement.
How to achieve change in thought process.
As Leader: Break the inertia & be Productive…
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