love and logic - slides

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Welcome to Love & Logic Presented by Dr. Jim Scott A GUIDE FOR PARENTS

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Page 1: Love and logic - slides

Welcome to

Love & Logic

Presented by Dr. Jim Scott

A GUIDE FOR PARENTS

Page 2: Love and logic - slides

Goals of ParentingRaise Children who are:

IndependentAble to think criticallyGood problem solvingKnow they are loved

Secure

Page 3: Love and logic - slides

THREE STYLES OFPARENTING

Helicopters

Drill Sergeants

Consultants

Page 4: Love and logic - slides

HelicoptersHover Rescue

As parents you do it all!

Children learn they do not have to be accountable.

Page 5: Love and logic - slides

Drill Sergeants

Work by command and intimidation

As parents you call all the shots.

As a child you are taught not to think!

Page 6: Love and logic - slides

Consultants

Offer help when asked.

As parents your role is to help children solve their own problems

As a child you are valued . You learn there are solutions and consequences to their behaviors.

Page 7: Love and logic - slides

Love and Logic Principles

Adults set firm limits in a loving way.

Childhood mistakes are seen as an opportunity for Learning

Page 8: Love and logic - slides

When the adult has immediate Control

Enforceable Statements

Choices WithinLimits

Uh, Oh song

Instant Empathetic Response

Page 9: Love and logic - slides

When the Adult has No Immediate Control

One-Liners to Neutralize Arguing Strategic

Training

Delayed consequence

InstantEmpathetic Response

Restitution

Problem Solving

Page 10: Love and logic - slides

NUTRALIZING ARGUING

ANTICIPATORY CONSEQUENCES

EMPATHETIC RESPONSES

CHOICES WITHIN LIMITS“UH, OH SONG”

RESTITTUTION

GUIDING KIDS TO SOLVE THEIR OWN PROBLEMS

CREATE ENFORCEABLE STATEMENTS

Page 11: Love and logic - slides

Neutralize Neutralize ArguingArguing

•Don’t allow your children to control your actions or you!

Page 12: Love and logic - slides

Two steps to Neutralize Arguing

1) Use Instant Empathetic Responses

The expression of genuine empathy has an amazing ability to soak up emotions.

I understand..

You sound up set

I know just what you mean

Page 13: Love and logic - slides

Step 2 Neutralize Arguing

Use love and logic one-liners

It is important that you use these one liners over and over.

Page 14: Love and logic - slides

Famous One Liners

Keep your composure

Listen be reflective

Create Statements that do not allow for control

Respond with Empathy

Page 15: Love and logic - slides

Famous One linersFamous One liners

• Send “Can do” Messages

• Give only choices you like

• Take care of yourself and set limits

• Use the sandwich technique

Page 16: Love and logic - slides

To get a free Love and Logic Materials and Catalogue

Call 1-800-338-4065Mon-Friday 7-5 p.m. (Mountain Time)