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Living Well: Christian Practices for Everyday Life“Managing Household Life” Learning Activities

(LifelongFaith Associates)

Review the “Educating for Christian Practices Guide” for additional assistance in designing a learning plan for Christian practices.

Contents1) Educating for Christian Practices Using the 4MAT Learning Process2) Sample Program Design for the Christian Practice of Managing Household Life3) Resources for Developing the Christian Practice of Managing Household Life

Educating for Christian Practices using the 4MAT Learning Process

In Quadrant One (Connect to Learners) the union of elements creates personal meaning, the way we question the value of new learning by connecting it to ourselves. The question to be answered is “Why?” Why is this of value to me? Why do I sense the need to know this? This is never telling, this is something that happens, something that intrigues them (a problem to solve), or connects to them (a situation that has real meaning in their lives), or touches them in a way that links to their humanity.

In Quadrant Two (Information Delivery) the union of elements creates conceptualized content, structuring knowledge into significant chunks that form the essence, the coherence, and the wonder of new ideas. The question to be answered is “What?” What is out there to be known? What do the experts know about this? What is the nature of the knowledge I am pursuing?

Living Well Learning Activities – Managing Household Life (LifelongFaith Associates 2009) 1

In Quadrant Three (Skill and Fluency Development) the union of elements creates usefulness (and the more immediate the better), the transferability into one’s life, problem solving with the learning. The question to be answered is “How?” How does this work? Will this streamline my tasks? How will this be of use in my life? This is where learners take the learning and do something with it, something that has meaning for them. This is where relevance is demonstrated.

In Quadrant Four (Creative and Authentic Performance), the union of elements creates creative integration, the way we adapt the learning into something new and unique. The question to be answered is “What If?” If I use this in my own way, what will happen? What can I create and how will that creation expand, enhance, and maybe even transform the world I know? The world “per-form” means to form through and that is the essence of this step. It represents the merging of the learning and the learner.

McCarthy emphasizes that knowledge must be used. It must operate in one’s life. And because all human beings are unique, we use and then integrate learning in our own inimitable, incomparable ways. What we learn is transformed into a particular use, a distinct way of doing, a matchless refinement of a method, a unique understanding. It is transformed. It becomes for us. It is in the transformation that real understanding happens.

4 MAT References Website: www.aboutlearning.com Teaching Around the 4MAT Cycle—Designing Instructive for Diverse Learners

with Diverse Learning Styles. Bernice McCarthy and Dennis McCarthy. Thousand Oaks, CA: Corwin Press, 2006.

About Teaching: 4MAT in the Classroom. Bernice McCarthy. Wauconda, IL: About Learning, 2000.

About Teaching Companion: The 4MAT Implementation Workbook. Bernice McCarthy and Dennis McCarthy. Wauconda, IL: About Learning, 2003.

Examples of Methods for Each Stage of the Process

Quadrant 1. Connecting to the Learner Why do learners need to know this? Actual case studies Stories (audio, video, illustrated) Personal storytelling Direct experience / field trip Simulated experience or game TV-style game show Interactive dialogue Personal reflection/journal Feature film segment

Media presentation (PowerPoint): images and music

Dramatic presentations Personal reflection tool/worksheet Quiz Self-assessment or inventory Prayer or ritual experience Witness presentations


Quadrant 2. Delivering Information What is it that we are teaching the learners?

Video presentation Audio presentation PowerPoint presentation with

content and images/music Guided reading and research Interviewing experts Demonstration Prayer or ritual experience Lecture Panel presentation

Study groups: read and analyze/reflect on selecting readings, and present findings in a small group or to the large group

Project-centered learning: develop a project that involves study, creative activity, and presentation of the project

Debate Inquiry-oriented discussion Learning tournament

Quadrant 3. Developing Skills and Fluency How will the learners use it in their lives?

Case study demonstrating how to use the information

In-session practice activities and exercises (specific to the content of the session)

Mentoring Role play / skill practice Field work Simulations In-field observations Demonstrations

Panel presentations Compare and contrast activities Creative writing activity, e.g., learners

rewrite Scripture stores or hymns n contemporary language and situations

Presentations by learners of a project Creative activity: learners create an

art project, song/music video, video or PowerPoint presentation, dramatic presentation, advertisement/commercial

Quadrant 4. Creative and Authentic Performance What will the learners become and do as a result of the learning experience?

Conduct a demonstration Write a report, article, or story

describing performance to share with others

Create action plans Create a photo or video

documentary of practice Field trip / mission trip

Participate in a church ministry (within the church or in the wider community)

Keep a journal or log of performance efforts

Get involved in an action learning project (e.g., service project, teaching others, leading an activity).

4MAT and the Living Well ProcessEach chapter in Living Well is developed around five movements:

1. Yearning taps into our hunger for living well by addressing a basic area of human need through the real-life stories of people who seek meaning and purpose for their lives through a particular practice.


2. Reflecting gives you, whether individually or with your household, an opportunity to become aware of how you experience the basic human need and hunger for the Christian practice in your own life, and how you may already be living this practice.

3. Exploring presents the biblical teaching on the practice, how the practice addresses our basic need and hungers, and why the practice is important for living a Christian life.

4. Living provides you with a variety of tools—activities, ideas, and strategies—that you can use to integrate each Christian practice into your daily life.

5. Praying concludes the chapter by offering God thanks and praise, and asking for God’s help.

Here is an application of the 4MAT learning cycle to teaching Christian practices to a large group (families, multiple generations, or adults) using the 5-part process of each Living Well: Christian Practices for Everyday Life chapter.

Quadrant 1Part 1. Yearning: The Hunger for the Practice Illustrating the hunger for the Christian practice in story, music, film, and/or

current events.

Part 2. Reflecting: Reflection on the Hunger Guiding the individual or family in identifying how they see the hunger in their

own lives and world. Helping people become aware of how they already engage in this practice, and

the things that distort or hinder the practice.

Quadrant 2Part 3. Exploring: The Christian Practice Grounding the Christian practice in the Bible by describing how the biblical

story(s) deepens our understanding of the Christian practice. Describing what people today, and throughout history, actually do when they are

engaged well in a particular practice—people or communities that live the practice with exceptional grace and skill.

Connecting the Christian practice to human needs and hungers. Identifying how and why it is important to living a meaningful life. Describing the benefits of living the Christian practice—for the person, family, and for the community and world.

Quadrant 3Part 4. Living: Application of the Christian Practice to Daily Life Giving people tools—activities, ideas, resources—for living the Christian practice

in their daily lives—at home, at work, at school, and in the world. Showing people how to make the Christian practice part of everyday life. Guiding people in performing the Christian practice and then reflecting on it.

Quadrant 4Part 4. Living: Application of the Christian Practice to Daily Life


Part 5. Praying: Prayer for the Practice Entering more deeply into the practice through prayer and reflection. Offering God thanks and praise, and asking for God’s help in living the practice.


Sample Program Design for the Christian Practice of Managing Household Life

A Word about this Program Design

The “Managing Household Life” chapter from Living Well: Christian Practices for Everyday Life explores three components of the Christian practice of managing household life: 1) managing household time and responsibilities, 2) managing household money, and 3) managing household property and possessions. You can design one session with all three components or teach three sessions, each one focused on one component.

During the session, children can use the Managing Household Life activities in the Living Well Children’s Workbook. Preparation

Materials

The following handouts are included with this session:1. A Scene from an America Household2. Images of the Good Life3. $50 Play Money4. The View of the Good Life in Our Society and Culture5. Managing Household Time and Responsibilities 6. Managing Household Money7. Managing Household Property and Possessions8. Managing Household Life Scripture Verses (cut out the verses, place in a bowl on

each table)9. Managing an “Environmentally-Friendly” Household

The following additional activities are included at the end of this program design:1. Saying Amen to Rules 2. Saying Amen to Priorities and Shared Responsibility3. Time Management

Suggested Setting

Organize the participants into table groups. Have a Bible on each table.

Preparation of Learning Activities

Poster paper, glue sticks or tape, paper, pens/pencils for everyone

Newsprint sheets and markers

Prior to the session make copies of the handout with the $50 play money and create packets (envelopes) with $500 for individuals and $1000 for families.

Record 6-10 of the most popular commercials on TV that have a message about the good life for viewing and analysis during the session.


Provide a variety of magazines with lots of advertisements for each table to use in creating a poster of ads about the good life.

A Practice Panel

This would be a good session to utilize a panel of people who can share their Christian practice of managing household life. Find people who can speak to one of the three components of the Christian practice of managing household life: managing time, money, and possessions. The goal of their “witness” story is to share the specific things you do to connect their Christian faith with managing time, money, or possessions. How do you see God at work in the practice of managing household life? How do you bring their faith into these household activities?

Invite a variety a people so that you get a good mix of stories, e.g., a single adult, a married couple, a family with children, an “empty-nest” family, a family in later life.


Session Plan

Quadrant 1. Connecting to the Learner: Household Life

1. Yearning—Stories of Household Life

Introduce the session with these words (from page 8.2 and 8.4 in Living Well):

It wasn’t so long ago that the home was the center of our lives and society. A lot has changed in the past fifty or sixty years. Today, managing our household life seems to have gotten lost in the sea of other commitments and activities outside the home. Yet, each of us hungers for the stability of a home life that gives our lives order and nurtures loving relationships.

There was a time when, for most people, nearly everything happened at home. All of the important things like falling in love, births, parties, deaths, funerals, work, education, health care, employment, food production, and even waste management were primarily family responsibilities. There were no birthing rooms, party centers, funeral homes, factories, office buildings or extensive government programs. And up until the last two hundred years or so, most communities had no formal schooling or hospital facilities. Managing household life was the center of society. Today it is not unusual for women and men to feel a bit embarrassed when they admit that they spend their days keeping house.

Share with the group the three opening stories, “The Challenge of Making a Home,” “Multi-Tasking,” and “Backyard Camping,” on pages 8.2—8.3 in Living Well. Use a different reader for each story.

After reading the stories ask people to share their feelings and thoughts about the stories. Display the questions on a PowerPoint presentation or on newsprint for all to see.

What were you feelings as you heard the three stories? What story was most meaningful for you? Which one spoke to you? What’s the best part of managing household life today? What’s most challenging or difficult about managing household life today?

Optional Activity: A Scene from an American HouseholdPerform the skit, A Scene from an American Household, found on the handout. You can keep the performance simple by creating cue cards for your actors. They will appreciate not having to memorize all of their lines. To make cue cards, type the script in a font size of at least 60. Print the script on 11” x 17” paper. Make three copies so that cue card holders can be visible from all angles of the stage for the convenience of the actors.

After the skit is performed, invite table groups to discuss the following questions. Then, have a representative from each table report back to the large group with one or two responses to the last two questions.

Name the words or phrases from the skit that stand out in your mind. Describe the actions from the skit that stand out in your mind. What feelings were expressed in the skit? Which character did you like the best? Why? Which character did you like the least? Why? Which character is most like you? Why?


How is this scene true in our society? How is this scene true for your household?


2. Reflecting—The Good Life

Part 1. Your View of the Good Life

The first activity helps people identify what the “good life” means to them, personally, or for their family. Using the handout, Images of the Good Life, instruct households (individuals or families) to check off the items that represent their current view of the good life—what they actually believe and practice, not what they should believe! They can also add their own descriptions of the good life that are important to them or their family using the blank spaces. (Young children can draw a picture describing the good life for them.)

At table groups have people share their lists with each other and take one or two of the most important items and explain to the group why it is important.

Part 2. Purchasing the Good Life

Give each individual a packet of $500 in play money and each family a packet of $1000. Make copies of the play money using the handout.

Introduce the “Purchasing the Good Life” activity by saying:

If you, as in individual, had $500 to spend today, or your family had $1000 to spend today on the good life, what would you purchase. Use the play money to register your choices. Use as many $50 dollar bills as necessary for each item you would purchase, but you cannot spend more than your allotment.

After people finish allocating their money, ask them to take a minute to reflect on what their choices tell them about their vision of the good life. After several minutes of reflection ask them to share their insights with their table group.

Part 3. The View of the Good Life in our Society and Culture

Give everyone a copy of the handout, View of the Good Life in our Society and Culture.

Introduce the activity by saying:

What does our popular culture and society tell us about good life? In this next activity we are going to explore what we can learn about the good life from advertisements and TV commercials. First we are going to examine commercials and the messages that they send to us.

First, begin with the TV commercials. Present the TV commercials to the group. Pause after each commercial to give the participants time to write the name of the commercial. After all of the commercials ask table groups to identify two or three central messages about the “Good Life” in each commercial. Conclude by telling the table groups to share what they have learned by discussing the following questions:

How do the commercials present a picture of the good life? How do you feel about what you have seen?

If you had these products, what difference would it make in your life? What did these commercials try to convince you that you personally need in order to have the good life? Do you really need this?


Second, give each table group a pile of current magazines. The magazines can be from a variety of sources. Make sure there are plenty of ads in the magazines. Ask table group members to review the magazines and newspapers, and identify images they think are especially good at portraying images of the good life. Then as a table group discuss the images and select up to 5-6 of the best ads. Remove these ads from the magazine or newspaper. Write the name of the ads on the worksheet and together, as a table group, identify the key message it is teaching about the “Good Life.” Create a poster with the ads.

Conclude by asking people at the table groups to share what they have learned by discussing the following questions:

How do the advertisements present a picture of the good life? How do you feel about what you have seen?

If you had these products, what difference would it make in your life? What did these advertisements try to convince you that you personally need in order to have the good life? Do you really need this?

3. Reflection Activity for Managing Household Time and Responsibilities

Give every household a copy of the handout, Managing Household Time and Responsibilities. Households should work together on this activity.

Introduce the following activity (found on page 8.5 of Living Well):

There never seems to be enough time. Yet, each of us has 24 hours to allocate each day. It’s not how much time we have. It’s how we spend our time. We all have 168 hours each week to spend. Use the chart on he handout to analyze how your household spends its time in a typical week. Do you best to estimate how much time you spend on the activities listed below, then add other activities particular to your household. Try to get close to 168 hours.

After people have completed their time chart, ask them to complete the five reflection questions.

1. What does your household’s use of time say about your priorities?2. How well does your household’s current allocation of time reflect your hopes and

dreams for your life together? How does your use of time reflect your values and what you most deeply believe?

3. What are the blessings in your use of time each week? 4. What are the stressors in your use of time each week?5. What would you change?

At table groups, invite each household to share their insights about how they manage time using their responses to the five questions. Ask them to share at least one thing they would change about their time use.

4. Reflection Activity for Managing Household Money

Give every household a copy of the handout, Managing Household Money. Households should work together on this activity.



How we spend our money says a lot about what’s important in life. There are the essential expenses, such as housing, food, utilities, and transportation. But there are also nonessential or “it would be nice” expenses, such as new clothes or entertainment. Draw a pie chart (below) that indicates the percentage of your household’s money that is spent on essential expenses and the percentage that is spent on nonessential items. Identify what nonessentials you actually spend money on.

After people have completed their pie chart, ask them to complete the five reflection questions.

1. What does your household’s use of money say about your priorities? 2. How does your use of money reflect your values and what you most deeply

believe? 3. What are the blessings in your use of money? 4. What are the stressors? 5. What would you change in your allocation of money?

At table groups, invite each household to share their insights about how they manage money using their responses to the five questions. Ask them to share at least one thing they would change about their management of money.

5. Reflection Activity for Managing Household Property and Possessions

Give every household a copy of the handout, Managing Household Property and Possessions. Households should work together on this activity.


Think about your material possessions and identify those possessions that you consider essential for household life, that are desirable but optional, and that are nonessential. Use the chart to list examples in each category.

After people have completed their possessions chart, ask them to complete the three reflection questions.

1. What do your material possessions say about your priorities? 2. How do your material possessions reflect your values and what you most deeply

believe? 3. What would you change?

At table groups, invite each household to share their insights about how they manage their possessions using their responses to the three questions. Ask them to share at least one thing they would change about their management of possessions.

Conclude by explaining that the final activity involves an analysis of their next purchase. Give each household time to complete the activity.

Think about a purchase you want to make in the future. What are some of the factors that will go into your decision-making. Rank the following values from most important (#1) to the least important when you are considering making a purchase.


Do you think this new purchase is essential for household life, desirable but optional, or nonessential?_________ Price_________ Impact on the environment _________ Personal spiritual development _________ Status in my community_________ A need versus a want_________ Moral integrity of the product manufacturer and how it treats workers _________ Convenience_________ Educational value of product_________ Expresses your vision of your household_________ Other: _____________________________________________

Quadrant 2. Delivering Information: The Christian Practice of Managing Household Life

The Exploring section of the “Managing Household Life” chapter on pages 8.8—8.11 in Living Well presents biblical teaching about managing time, money, and possessions.

Develop a presentation (using PowerPoint with photos and illustrations) that explains each the biblical teaching using the Scripture readings, the key points in the commentary, and your own examples. Select people who will read the Scripture passages as part of your presentation. You could also divide the presentation among four people, each presenting one part.

1. Part 1. Introduction (page 8.8)2. Part 2. Managing Our Time (page 8.9)3. Part 3. Managing Our Money (pages 8.9-810)4. Part 4. Managing Our Property and Possessions (page 8.11)

Conclude your presentation with table group discussions using the following questions. Give each person/household an opportunity to think about the questions and then invite people to share their responses. Tell group to start with the first question and have people share on that question before moving to the second and then the third question. Display the question on a PowerPoint presentation or on newsprint for all to see.

1. What did you learn about the Christian teaching on managing time that can be beneficial for you and your household? How were you affirmed by the biblical teaching? How were you challenged?

2. What did you learn about the Christian teaching on managing money that can be beneficial for you and your household? How were you affirmed by the biblical teaching? How were you challenged?

3. What did you learn about the Christian teaching on managing possessions that can be beneficial for you and your household? How were you affirmed by the biblical teaching? How were you challenged?

Additional Activity: Hearing God’s VoiceThis activity uses the handout, Managing Household Life Scripture Verses. Prepare the verses in advance: cutting them into strips and placing them in a bowl on each table.

Introduce this activity by saying:


In the days when the Bible was being written and the Christian church was being formed there was a common belief that a good leader was a person who knew how to manage a household. Managing household life was an important practice that prepared people to function well in society. Here is how it is said in the first letter to Timothy, “[A good leader] must be able to manage his own family well and make his children obey him with all respect. For if a man does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of the church of God?” (1 Timothy 3:4-5) Leadership, like faith and almost everything else, is first learned at home.

Each table has a bowl with some pieces of paper in it. There are verses from the Bible on each slip of paper. Take turns selecting a piece of paper from the bowl. Read the verse on the paper, and discuss at your table the following question:

What is God trying to tell us about managing our households?

Continue this process until all eight verses have been read and discussed.

After each table group has had an opportunity to discuss the eight scripture verses, invite a spokesperson to report their key findings to the whole group. If you have many tables, invite only a few tables to report.

Quadrant 3. Developing Skills and Fluency: Ways to Live the Christian Practice of Managing Household Life

1. A Practice Panel

This would be a good time to utilize a panel of people who can share their Christian practice of managing household life. Find people who can speak to one of the three components of the Christian practice of managing household life: managing time, money, and possessions. The goal of their “witness” story is to share the specific things they do to connect their Christian faith with managing time, money, or possessions. How do they see God at work in the practice of managing household life? How do they bring their faith into these household activities?

Invite a variety a people so that you get a good mix of stories, e.g., a single adult, a married couple, a family with children, an “empty-nest” family, a family in later life.

2. Ideas for Living the Christian Practice of Managing Household Life

Organize people into three groups: managing time, managing money, and managing possessions. (If you have a large group, organize several groupings for each area: time, money, and possessions.)

During the session, children can use the Managing Household Life activities in the Living Well Children’s Workbook.

Have each group review the strategies for their area (time, money, possessions) on pages 8.12-8.14 in the Living Well book.

Managing Time Re-evaluate your current use of time Budgeting household time


Develop a family or household schedule Making room for priorities Time budgeting for children

Managing Money Re-evaluate your current use of money Budgeting Checkbook examination of conscience Alternative Christmas giving Gifts that give

Managing Property Sharing our stuff Sharing the outdoors Share the responsibility to care

Ask each group to work together to develop strategies and ideas that flow from the biblical teaching for living the Christian practice of managing household life in their area (time, money, possessions). The goal is to develop specific ways people can connect their Christian faith with managing time, money, or possessions, see God at work in the practice of managing household life, and bring their faith into these household activities.

Give each group a sheet of newsprint and a marker and ask them to record their ideas on the newsprint.

When the groups are doing, post the newsprint sheets and ask each group for a brief report of their ideas. Tell people that they will be able to use these ideas in developing strategies for living the Christian practice in the next section of the session.

3. An Environmental Audit

Conclude this part of the session by asking every household (individual or family) to conduct an “environmental audit” using the handout, Managing an “Environmentally-Friendly” Household (see page 8.15 in Living Well). Have them identify what they are already doing and things they can begin doing to live in an “environmentally-friendly” household. Their new ideas can become part of their action plan.

Quadrant 4. Demonstrating Creative and Authentic Performance: Living the Practice of Managing Household Life

1. Integrating the Christian Practice of Managing Household Life into Daily Life

Conclude the session by guiding people in creating an action plan for living the Christian practice of managing household life. Have individuals, couples, and families develop a plan.

Remind people of all the ideas that were presented in the Living Well book, and on the newsprint sheets from the prior activity. Ask people to consider ways they can improve how they live the Christian practice of managing household life. Explain the process of moving from idea to action. Give people a worksheet or piece of paper to create their action plan.


1. List 2-3 actions you would like to take to live the Christian practice of Managing Household Life (time, money, possessions) as an individual or household.

2. Describe what you will do to put each action into practice, and the steps you will take to ensure that it will happen.

Conclude by inviting people to share one action idea with their table group.

3. Closing Prayer

Use the prayer on page 8.16 in Living Well to close the session or the prayer service below.

Prayer ServiceLeader

Let us pray through our households in the name of the God who gracefully manages the great household of creation. We will respond to each prayer with “We thank you, Lord.”

ReaderWe pray through our kitchens, the place where we prepare the food that sustains our lives. For the goodness of kitchen work, we pray to the Lord.

AllWe thank you, Lord.

ReaderWe pray through our mealtime table, the place where we give and receive physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual nourishment. For the abundant and generous sharing at our tables, we pray to the Lord.


ReaderWe pray through our living rooms and family rooms, the place where we gather to build relationships. For the laughter and tears that encourage and heal us, we pray to the Lord.


ReaderWe pray through our bathrooms, the place where we begin and end our days. For the cleansing and refreshing that revitalizes us, we pray to the Lord.


ReaderWe pray through our bedrooms, the place where God speaks in our dreams. For restful sleep that keeps our lives in balance, we pray to the Lord.


LeaderOur houses and apartments are holy places when we manage them with love, joy and gratitude. May we practice the ways of love in our households every


day so that our saving faith will flood our neighborhoods with God’s presence. We pray in the name of our God who promises to have many rooms for us in the household of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.


A Scene from an American HouseholdCharacters Husband: Joe Wife: Maria Son: Chad (About seven-years old) Daughter: Alicia (About twelve-years old) Son: Tony (About fifteen-years old)

SettingThe stage is set with an office desk and chair on the left side and a typical kitchen on the right side (kitchen should include table and chairs… other parts can be imagined with actors miming their actions at the oven and the sink). Joe is sitting at the desk on the phone and doing paperwork.

Role Play

Joe: (on phone) Yeah, I had to bring some work home today. Maria is closing a deal with one of her clients. I’m watching the kids; it’s kind of a crazy day. Okay, Tom, it was good doing business with you. I’ll talk to you on Monday. Bye. (Joe hangs up the phone and begins doing paperwork at his desk.)

Chad runs into the kitchen screaming because Alicia is playfully chasing him. Joe gets distracted from his work and looks annoyed as Chad and Alicia continue to run in circles in the kitchen, making a lot of noise.

Joe: (frustrated) Take it outside, Kids! I’m trying to get my work done here. You’re mom will be home soon. (Joe addresses Alicia as an afterthought as Chad and Alicia are leaving) Alicia, will you set the table for supper? (Joe returns to his desk work.)

Tony: (enters the kitchen and begins sniffing the air with an increasingly disgusted look on his face… his voice sounds calm but concerned) Dad, I think the house is on fire.

Joe: (with ridicule) The house in not on… (realizing that dinner is burning in the oven and beginning to panic) Oh no! Tony, turn off the oven! (Tony looks confused. Joe jumps from his chair and runs to the oven.) Never mind, I’ll get it! (Joe quickly removes burning food from oven and plops it on the table. (He turns towards the sink to wash his hands and glances out the window above the sink. He’s shocked at what he sees.) Alicia! Alicia! Stop trying to shove Chad’s head into that gopher hole! Alicia! Stop it right now or I’m going to come right out there! Hey, didn’t I tell you to set the table for supper? Get in here right now and set the table!

Tony: (Looking at burnt food) Dad, what are we going to have for supper?

Joe: I don’t know, Tony, I suppose we’re going to have to have cereal or peanut butter and jelly. (Tony throws his hands into the air and exits, muttering a sarcastic remark under his breath. Alicia enters and begins setting the table. Joe puts cereal and milk on the table as his office phone rings.)


Joe: (on phone) Hello. Sam, how are you? (Joe looks disturbed) Yes, I know, Sam… I messed up that order… I know it’s going to cost…

Maria: (enters in a rage dragging Chad behind her) Joe, did you know that your son’s head was stuck in a gopher hole? (Sniffing) What’s that awful smell? (Joe waves off Maria angrily as he continues to debate with Sam on the phone.)

Tony: (enters kitchen and walks to the sink for a glass of water) Dad nuked the casserole. We’re having Honey Crusty Flakes for supper.

Maria: (gives Joe a look of disappointment as he is still on phone) Oh, honey! (sighs) Well, there’s no time to make anything else. (to Tony) You have to be at soccer, and Alicia has piano. Quick… Everyone get to the table and pour a bowl of cereal.

Joe: (holding hand over phone and addressing Maria with hopeful expectation) Maria, did you close the deal?

Maria: (still angry) Well, hello to you, too! No, I didn’t close the deal. My clients changed their minds at the last minute. (Alicia begins chasing Chad around the table again. Tony begins to eat his cereal, ignoring the chaos.)

Joe: (shocked) Maria, you said it was a sure thing! We were counting on that money. How are we going to pay down our credit card debt?

Maria: (sarcastically) Look, Joe, why don’t YOU go and try to talk to my WONDERFUL client. Maybe you can do a better job. Meanwhile, (increasing anger crescendos to yelling) I’ll stay here and clean gopher poop off of Chad’s head!!! (deep breath trying to regain composure) Get off the phone, we have to eat, and I have to get Tony and Alicia to their appointments. (Maria takes Chad to sink to wash his head while Alicia joins Tony at the table. Tony and Alicia eat. They begin to push and poke at each other.)

Joe: (getting off of phone and coming to table) Hey, you two stop that behavior at the supper table!

Maria: (finishing up with Chad at sink and approaching the table) Chad, just grab your bowl, honey. You’ll have to eat in the car. Tony and Alicia, let’s go… you’re going to be late. Joe (with pleading eyes), please have this mess cleaned up before I get home. (Maria, Chad, Tony and Alicia exit)

Joe: (sitting alone at the table eating a spoonful of cereal… looks off into space in exhausted amazement) Wow! What just happened? (Joe places head in hands, massaging his forehead)

The End


Images of the Good LifeWhat does the “good life” mean for you or your family? Check off the items that represent your view of the good life. Feel free to add new items of the good life that are important for you or your family?

Owning a nice home Having a new car A loving family Financial security A pension Medical insurance Having the latest high tech consumer product (HD televisions, I-pods, computer) Having (or getting) a good education Having a good paying job Having friends Playing sports Good health Volunteering time to help people Recreation Spending time together as a family (e.g., family meals, holidays, family activities) Participating actively in the life of the church (e.g., Sunday Mass, programs, gatherings) Taking a vacation once or more each year Buying the newest fashion clothes Being physically fit Having time for entertainment, such as going to the movies or concerts Having new toys or games or music or movie DVDs

Add other items that are important to you or your family?

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The View of the Good Life in Our Society & Culture


The MessagesIdentify the products and message advertised in the TV commercials and magazine ads.

Product Message/Values about the Good Life

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Reflection Questions

How do the commercials/advertisements present a picture of the good life? How do you feel about what you have seen?

If you had these products, what difference would it make in your life? What did these commercials/advertisements try to convince you that you personally need in order to have the good life? Do you really need this?

Managing Household Time & Responsibilities

Household Activities Number of Hours


school and workrest and sleepactivities and sportsentertainment: TV, reading, listening to musicfamily meals and activitieshousehold chores and responsibilities shoppingchurch activities and household spiritual activities

Total 168 hours

Now that you feel totally exhausted from all that you do as a household, take some time to reflect on what your time chart is telling you by using the following questions.

1. What does your household’s use of time say about your priorities?

2. How well does your household’s current allocation of time reflect your hopes and

dreams for your life together? How does your use of time reflect your values and what you most deeply believe?

3. What are the blessings in your use of time each week?

4. What are the stressors in your use of time each week?

5. What would you change?


Managing Household Money How we spend our money says a lot about what’s important in life. There are the essential expenses, such as housing, food, utilities, and transportation. But there are also nonessential or “it would be nice” expenses, such as new clothes or entertainment. Draw a pie chart (below) that indicates the percentage of your household’s money that is spent on essential expenses and the percentage that is spent on nonessential items. Identify the essentials (on the left side of the circle) and nonessentials (on the right) you actually spend money on.

Reflection

1. What does your household’s use of money say about your priorities?

2. How does your use of money reflect your values and what you most deeply believe?

3. What are the blessings in your use of money?

4. What are the stressors?

5. What would you change in your allocation of money?


Managing Household Property & Possessions Think about your material possessions and identify those possessions that you consider essential for household life, that are desirable but optional, and that are nonessential. Use the chart to list examples in each category.

Essential Desirable but Optional Not Necessary

Reflection1. What do your material possessions say about your priorities? 2. How do your material possessions reflect your values and what you most deeply believe? 3. What would you change?

Think about a purchase you want to make in the future. What are some of the factors that will go into your decision-making. Rank the following values from most important (#1) to the least important when you are considering making a purchase. Do you think this new purchase is essential for household life, desirable but optional, or nonessential?

_________ Price_________ Impact on the environment _________ Personal spiritual development _________ Status in my community_________ A need versus a want_________ Moral integrity of the product manufacturer and how it treats workers _________ Convenience_________ Educational value of product_________ Expresses your vision of your household_________ Other: _____________________________________________


Managing Household Life Scripture Verses

Psalm 127:1 – If the Lord does not build the house, the work of the builders is useless.

1 Timothy 4:8 – Physical exercise has some value, but spiritual exercise is valuable in every way….

James 4:1-2 – Where do all the fights and quarrels among you come from? They come from your desires for pleasure, which are constantly fighting within you…. you strongly desire things, but you cannot get them, so you quarrel and fight.

Matthew 6:34 – So do not worry about tomorrow; it will have enough worries of its own. There is no need to add to the troubles each day brings.

1 Corinthians 12:7 – The Spirit’s presence is shown in some way in each person for the good of all.

1 Corinthians 13:5 – Love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable, love does not keep a record of wrongs….

Matthew 6:19-20 – Do not store up riches for yourselves here on earth, where moths and rust destroy, and robbers break in and steal. Instead, store up riches for yourselves in heaven.

Matthew 5:42 – When someone asks you for something, give it to him; when someone wants to borrow something; lend it to him.


Managing an “Environmentally-Friendly” HouseholdThink about all the things you currently do and what you can begin doing—today!

Already Do This

Will Begin Doing This

1. Drive less: walk, bike, carpool, and/or use mass transit. Consider a car-free day each week.

2. Eat less feedlot beef. Eat lower on the food chain—going meatless for just one meal a week can make a difference. Eat eco-friendly seafood.

3. Free yourself from junk mail by removing your name for mailing lists, and save a forest!

4. Install compact fluorescent light bulbs throughout your house. 5. Conserve energy by lowering the temperature 3°F in the winter

from where you would normally set it , and raise the temperature 3°F in the summer from where you would normally set it. Turn down the heat and air conditioning when you aren’t home.

6. Eliminate lawn and garden pesticides and look for environmentally-friendly alternatives.

7. Reduce home water usage and use water-saving toilets, faucets, and shower heads. Take shorter showers.

8. Eat more local, organic, in-season foods whenever possible and reduce the amount of energy needed to transport food, thereby reducing carbon emissions.

9. Use a reusable water bottle and a high-quality home filter instead of buying bottled water.

10.Wash your clothes in cold water and choose the no-heat cycle on your dishwasher.

11.Bring your own bag or a cloth bag to the grocery store instead of using disposable bags.

12.Choose energy efficient EnergyStar appliances which reduce carbon pollution, and have a big impact on your energy bill.

13.Turn off computers and monitors when not in use. Make sure the hibernation and sleep settings are enabled.

14.Weatherproof your home. Make sure your walls and ceilings are insulated, and consider double-pane windows. Eliminate drafts with caulking, weather strips, and storm windows and doors.

15.Choose foods with less packaging to reduce waste. 16.Recycle all your paper, glass, aluminum, and plastic, as well

electronics.


Additional Activity: Saying Amen to RulesIntroduce this activity with these or similar words (This activity should be led with energetic enthusiasm): The word amen is a Hebrew word that means so be it. When we say amen we are saying that we believe that what we hear is true. I am going to make some general statements about household rules. If you believe the statement is true, please respond with a hearty amen.

Say amen if you have rules in your household.

Say amen if you believe your rules are fair.

Say amen if you believe your rules are unfair.

Say amen if the reasons for your rules are clear to everyone in the household.

Say amen if there are consequences for breaking rules in your household.

Say amen if you have ever paid a consequence for breaking a rule in your household.

Say amen if you have ever been rewarded for obeying the rules in your household.

Say amen if you would like to be rewarded for obeying the rules in your household.

Continue the activity with these or similar words: Every household has rules, some are spoken and some are just understood. Rules work best when they are…

1. clearly stated2. grounded in reason3. have clear consequences4. are consistently and evenly enforced

For example, one family has a rule that high school teens are not permitted to ride in cars with more than one other high school teen other than siblings. The reason for the rule is

that studies show that teen driving accidents are far more likely when more than one other teen is in the car. This has been proven in numerous independent studies, and some

states have made this rule a law. The consequence in this particular family for breaking this rule is that the teen driver will not be permitted to use the car for recreation for two weeks. The reward for obeying this rule is that the teen will be given increasing driving

independence as each six-month period passes. The parents will enforce the rule by checking in periodically with other parents of kids who are friends with the teen driver. Notice that this rule is clearly stated, it is grounded in reason and solid research, it has

consequences attached to it, and it has a method for enforcement. It is a rule that expresses the Christian values of love for young people and justice for other drivers on the

road.

Distribute one rules handout per household. Use the rules handout on your table to list and discuss some of the rules in your household.

Invite households to share one of their successful rules with the large group. As the rules are presented, the leaders should comment on how the rules are expressions of good Christian household management. Make as many connections to the scripture quotes you explored earlier or any other scripture quotes you may think of.


Managing Household Life: RulesThe Rule The Reason

for the RuleConsequences for Breaking the Rule

Awards for Obeying the Rule

How the Rule is Enforced

Family Rule #1

Family Rule #2

Family Rule #3


Additional Activity: Saying Amen to Priorities & Shared Responsibility

Introduce this activity with these or similar words:

Now I invite you to respond amen to the following statements about rooms in your household:

Say amen if you have a room in your house that needs some attention.

Say amen if you have several rooms in your house that need some attention.

Say amen if you’re embarrassed to have company over because of those rooms.

Say amen if you can’t afford to fix everything in your house that needs attention right now.

Say amen if you don’t have enough room in your household.

Say amen if you have rooms that are too cluttered.

Say amen if some members of your family don’t clean up after themselves.

Say amen if you’re the one who cleans up after everyone else.

Say amen if you don’t clean up after yourself and you like it when someone else does.

Say amen if you’re the one who cleans up after everyone and you believe your behavior is enabling others to be messy.

With excitement: Say amen if you have a dream that one day everyone will put their socks in the proper hamper!

Say amen brothers and sisters if you can see the light of an organized household in your future!

Distribute a piece of poster board and a box of crayons to each household group. Invite them to draw the floor plan of their house on the poster board. All floors should be represented on the plan. After each household has finished their floor plans, invite them to label the floor plans according to the following instructions:

Label the rooms that need repairs or remodeling in red numbers from highest to lowest priority (number 1 is the room that most needs repair or remodeling).

Label the rooms according to clutter in blue numbers from most cluttered to least cluttered (number 1 is the room that is most cluttered).

Put the name or names of persons who are most responsible for each room in the room(s) for which they are responsible. Some rooms may be the responsibility of all family members.

Invite participants to look at their floor plans as you make the following comments:


Priorities are an essential part of good household management. Priorities save us from needless worry. In Matthew’s gospel we hear, “So do not worry about tomorrow; it will have enough worries of its own. There is no need to add to the troubles each day brings.” Focus on the red number one on your floor plan. Discuss with your household members a way that you will address the needs in this room. Promise that you will no longer worry about the other rooms until the needs of this room are addressed. Room # 1 is today’s worry; there is no need to worry about tomorrow’s concerns. Rooms labeled # 2 and higher are tomorrow’s concerns, and worrying about them should wait until room #1 is finished. Give the household members time to discuss what they will do with the room labeled red #1. Single persons can plan in silence or discuss their plans with other single persons. They may also be invited to join with a family for the discussion.

After families finish discussing the room labeled red #1, invite them to discuss the room labeled blue #1. Remind them that this is today’s worry, and they must not worry about any of the other rooms until they have adequately addressed the concerns of the room labeled blue #1.

Close this part of the activity with these or similar words: Now that you have set your priorities for the near future, your task when you return home is to stick with the agreements you made here. Do not worry about any rooms in your house until you have settles the issues in room red #1 and room blue #1.

Introduce this part of the activity with these or similar words: Obviously we cannot expect you to totally ignore the needs of other rooms in your house while you give special attention to particular rooms. This next discussion will help you to organize daily management of each room in your house. The goal is to manage each room intentionally so that your home will be a household of Christian justice and peace.

Each member of the household is gifted by the Holy Spirit to make some kind of contribution for the good of all. Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians says, “The Spirit’s presence is shown in some way in each person for the good of all.” Look at the names of the persons who are responsible for each room of the house. Identify how each person can help to manage the rooms where his/her name is found. Young children can make simple contributions while older children and adults can take more responsibility and perform more complex tasks. Challenge everyone to do their work in a spirit of Christian service. For example, doing the dishes is a necessary task for the health and welfare of everyone who eats in the house. Without clean dishes, disease would take over the family. Doing dishes is a noble act of Christian service in every household. It is a practice that we all should share.

As you discuss shared responsibility in your household, be sure to discuss a plan to hold all members of the household accountable. Super-responsible members of the household will have to resist the temptation to do others’ work so that they will not enable irresponsibility. Less-responsible members will need regular, gentle reminders to keep them on track. These behaviors are new practices and will take time to become habitual practices. Be patient and persistent.

Give household tables time to discuss family tasks for each room on their floor plans. When they are finished discussing, invite a few households to share some of their insights and discoveries about shared responsibility.


Additional Activity: Time ManagementThe balloons for this activity should be 8” round balloons. Single persons can do this activity alone and still get the point.

Use these or similar words to introduce this activity: Managing our time both inside and outside of the house is quite a challenge these days. There are so many good opportunities for home activities as well as involvement in our community. It’s hard to keep it all balanced. Each household has several balloons and a permanent marker. You have also been given a list of some of the things that take up your time each week. First discuss the amount of time you spend each week on each activity on the list. Then blow up one balloon for each item on the list. Make the balloon larger for items that take up more of your time and smaller for items that take up less of your time. After a balloon is inflated, tie it off and label it. You will end up with eight inflated and labeled balloons.

Give families time to complete this activity.

Continue this activity with these instructions:

Each household needs to find space in the room where they can stand in a circle with all members facing each other.

Divide the balloons evenly among the household members. Challenge the households to keep as many balloons in the air by bouncing them

back and forth to each other. Any balloons that hit the floor should be left on the floor while other balloons remain in the air. Keep as many balloons in the air for as long as you can.

Allow families to try this activity more than once. They may develop new strategies each time they work at it.

Address the following questions to the large group for a general discussion:

What made this activity challenging? Which balloons ended up on the floor first? Why did this happen? What does that

say about our time management? Which balloons were easiest to keep in the air? Why? What does that say about

our priorities for time management? Answer this question in your household group: Are there any activities that we

should be giving more or less time? Invite family groups to report back to the large group about which activities

should receive more and less time. In 1 Thessalonians 5:17 St. Paul tells us to pray at all times. How can we pray at

all times even while we are doing the other things we have to do each day? Invite responses to this question. Suggest to the group that all activity can be prayerful if we do our activities in a spirit of love, joy and gratitude. We can pray at all times if we are always aware of God’s presence in everything we do. There are prayerful ways to do chores and selfish ways to do chores. There are prayerful ways to eat family meals and selfish ways to eat family meals. There are prayerful ways to exercise and selfish ways to exercise. There are prayerful ways to study and selfish ways to study. There are prayerful ways to talk to each other and selfish ways to talk to each other. We manage our time best when we respond to God’s call in everything that we do.


Time Management ActivitiesWrite these words on your inflated balloons. The ones that take up most of your time in the course of a week should be written on larger balloons. The ones that take up the least amount of time in the course of a week should be written on smaller balloons. Discuss the time that your household gives to each activity before you blow up your balloons.

Prayer

Physical Exercise/Sports/Music/Art

Community Service

Family Meals

Family Conversations

Hosting Guests

Study/Reading/Work

Television/Computer/Video Games


Resources for Developing the Christian Practice ofManaging Household Life

“Household Economics.” Sharon Daloz Parks. Practicing Our Faith. Dorothy C. Bass, editor. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1997.

Jesus in the House: Gospel Reflections on Christ’s Presence in the Home. Allan F. Wright. Cincinnati: St. Anthony Messenger Press, 2007

The word “home” is used thirty-three times and the word “house” ninety-nine times in the Gospels of the New Revised Standard Version Bible. While many of us typically envision a Jesus who publicly preached in the streets and on the hillsides of Palestine, Jesus also ministered often in the home. “Why was it that Jesus spent so much of his time in the homes and houses of the people?” Allan Wright asks. “How did Jesus’ own experience of home assist in his formation throughout his childhood and facilitate his understanding of the importance of home? More importantly, what lessons are there for us? Do we still need the presence of Jesus in our homes today? How much different would homes be today if we taught, forgave, healed and shared meals like Jesus did?” Biblical scholar Allan Wright explores twenty-nine usages of home in the Scriptures, offering a reflection on the Gospel story, a prayer, reflection questions and challenges to the reader. Written for families, small groups or personal use, Jesus in the House encourages all of us to bring the presence of Christ into our homes.

Keeping House: The Litany of Everyday Life. Margaret Kim Peterson. San Francisco: Jossey Bass, 2007.

Keeping House is a wide-ranging and witty exploration of the spiritual gifts that are gained when we take the time to care for hearth and home. Margaret Kim Peterson examines the activities and attitudes of keeping house and making a home. Debunking the commonly held notion that keeping house is a waste of time or at best a hobby, Peterson uncovers the broader cultural and theological factors that make housekeeping an interesting and worthwhile discipline. She reveals how the seemingly ordinary tasks of folding laundry, buying groceries, cooking, making beds, and offering hospitality can be seen as spiritual practices that embody and express concrete and positive ways of living out Christian faith in relationship to others at home, in the church and in the world.

Loving Your Home: An Upbeat, No-Nonsense Guide to Simplicity, Order, and Care. Carol Showalter with Mary Jane Preston. Brewster, MA: Paraclete Press, 2009.

Learn to create a home you want to live in with this practical guide to creating order out of the chaos of daily life. Encouraging. Light-hearted. Roll-up-your-sleeves helpful. In this down-to-earth guide, you begin by assessing the essentials of your home and daily routine. Then, facing the things that you find most bothersome or difficult, you learn basic steps to de-stress your home and organize your life. For anyone, organized or disorganized, a gentle, mindful guide to bringing God’s order into the order of life. Includes: Tips on living well and making your house a home. Ideas on “lightening your load” by working together with friends. Spiritual words of wisdom on the everyday work of living. Checklists for cleaning/organizing specific areas of your home. Daily, weekly, and monthly goals.


How to create a yearly plan for maintaining a home of simplicity, order, and care

Next to Godliness: Finding the Sacred in Housekeeping. Edited by Alice Peck. Woodstock, VT: Skylight Paths, 2007.

Be they our kitchens after a meal or our communities after a crisis, we all face the times—and opportunities—when we must clean up. Through a beautiful, diverse and eclectic array of personal narratives, fiction, sacred texts and verse, this inspiring book offers new perspectives on the unique ways we can reach out for the Divine within the simple acts of washing the dishes, doing the laundry, making a home and more. Giving the process of cleaning house depth and resonance, these writings will speak to your heart and allow you to see beyond the task at hand and into a greater undertaking—to realize the sacred in all that we do.From sweeping the home, to organizing the office, to cleaning up the more daunting “Big Messes” in our communities, this engaging book touches upon every facet of our lives.Contributors include: Gaston Bachelard, Gwendolyn Brooks, Joan Chittister, Billy Collins, John Crawford, Mahatma Gandhi, Thich Nhat Hanh, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Homer, Martin Luther King, Jr., Cheryl Mendelson, Pablo Neruda, Kathleen Norris, Louise Rafkin, Marilynne Robinson, Rumi, and many others

Organizing from the Inside Out. (Second Edition) Julie Morgenstern. New York: Henry Holt and Company, 2004. [Also a PBS Home Video]

Julie Morgenstern offers a fresh, insightful approach to the organizing process- by sharing the secrets and techniques she has used for nearly a decade with clients nationwide. Organizing from the inside out—designing a system based on your life goals, natural habits and psychological needs—ensures, once and for all, a system that won’t break down. In Parts One and Two, Morgenstern demystifies the process of getting organized by showing you just what has been holding you back. She explains the basic steps - analyze, strategize, attack - to use on every organizing project, no matter how big or small, and shares tricks of the trade for avoiding common pitfalls. In Parts Three and Four, Morgenstern shows how to apply these steps to every area of your life and work including offices, home offices, mobile offices, bathrooms, closets, kitchens, kid’s rooms, garages, schedules and technology. Other books on the subject tend to focus solely on tips and gloss over the psychological issues and practical challenges we all face in our efforts to conquer chaos. Organizing from the Inside Out goes straight to the heart of the matter and teaches you how to work with your personality rather than against it to achieve the results you are looking for. Morgenstern believes organizing is a completely learnable skill, and offers the reader a total reeducation of the organizing process.

Time Management from the Inside Out. (Second Edition) Julie Morgenstern. New York: Henry Holt and Company, 2004. [Also a PBS Home Video]

Applying the groundbreaking from-the-inside-out approach that made Organizing from the Inside Out a New York Times bestseller, Julie Morgenstern set a new standard for the time- management category. Her system has helped countless readers uncover their psychological stumbling blocks and strengths, and develop a time-management system that suits their individual needs. By applying her proven three-step program—Analyze, Strategize, Attack—and following her effective guidelines, readers will find more time for work, family, self-improvement, or whatever is most important to them. Time management is a learnable skill, and in this completely revised edition, Morgenstern provides the ultimate tools to combine,


delegate, and eliminate unnecessary tasks; put technology to work; and stop procrastinating once and for all.


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