leveraging style for conflict management€¦ · communication preferences 13 • expressive...
TRANSCRIPT
4/28/2016
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Leveraging Style for Conflict Management
Merida L. Johns, PhD, RHIAThe Monarch Center for Women’s Leadership Development
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Conflict
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Sources of Conflict
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POWER
CLASH OF IDEAS
SCARCE RESOURCES
GOALS
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Forms of Conflict
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Healthy Unhealthy
• Depersonalized• Work in progress• Ideas and plans• Who should do what
• Rooted in anger• Personality clashes• Ego-driven
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Leader’s Role in Conflict
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In C
onfl
ict • Know
personal default style
• Know other’s response
• Know when to change default M
edia
tor • Neutral
• Assess cause• Analyze
potential effects/actions
• Provide fair resolutionI
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What is Social Style
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▫ Describes patterns of behavior
▫ Describes interpersonal functioning
▫ Focus on social relationships
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Social Style Chart
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Amiable• Likes other people’s company
A listener not a talker
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• A listener not a talker• Loyal, personable, patient• Non-confrontational• Unlikely to take risks• Slow in making decision• Good counseling and listening skills• Weak in goal setting and self-
direction
• In conflict: passive, avoids• Basic need: Security
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Communication Preferences
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• Amiable (Relationships)▫ Spend time relating upfront▫ Ask open-ended questions▫ Allow time for brainstorming▫ Listen
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Expressive• Likes company of others• Talker not a listener
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• Talker not a listener• Tends to dream and get others
caught up in dreams• Likes to be the center action• Jumps from one activity to
another• Energy, action, emotional
• In conflict: Unpredictable, pemotional
• Basic Need: Recognition
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Communication Preferences
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• Expressive (Spontaneous) • Relate first, don’t jump into business up
front▫ Acknowledge their energy▫ Repeat back what they say▫ Allow them to blow off steam
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Analytical• Likes organization and structure• Likes to look at every angle before
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• Likes to look at every angle before making a decision
• Persistent in questioning• Focus on detail and facts• Prefers objective, task-oriented,
intellectual work• Works slowly, precisely, alone
• In conflict: Can appear to be ppnegative
• Basic Need: To be correct
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Communication Preferences
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• Analytic (Thinker) • Explain purpose ahead of time▫ Purpose of meeting/conversation▫ Send questions ahead of time▫ Ask them questions▫ Ask them for their data
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Driver• Expect efficiency from everyone• Little emphasis on building
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• Little emphasis on building relationships – low tolerance for feelings
• Risk taker• Decisive - pushes things through• Dislikes inaction• Cool, independent, competitive• Good administrative skills
• In conflict: Aggressive, abrupt• Basic Need: To control
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Communication Preferences
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• Driver (Results) • Let them know end game▫ Be precise – bullet points▫ Ask questions that facilitate decision making▫ Step forward quickly
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Backup and Growth Behaviors
Backup Behaviors
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Backup Behaviors
Amiable Expressive Analytic Driver
Acquiesces Attacks Avoids Autocratic
Growth
Amiable Expressive Analytic Driver
Initiate Check Decide Listen
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Six Principles
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•How aware was I of my style and emotions?
Be aware of your style
•What were my assumptions?
Understand clash of beliefs/values
•Did I understand the other person?
Acknowledge/understand the other’s style
•What tone did I set?
Set proper frame
Communicate with tact and empathy
•How well did I communicate to the other’s style?
•How might results been different if I changed my style?
Change style to accommodate the situation
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Left Hand Column Exercise
Left Hand Reflection Right Hand (What Happened)
Think of a difficult conversation or conflict with someone that you were involved with recently that was less than satisfactory.
Write down the conversation that t k l b t d th
•How aware was I of my style and emotions?
Be aware of your style
•What were my assumptions?
Understand clash of beliefs/values
•Did I understand the other person?
Acknowledge/understand the other’s style
Set proper frame
took place between you and the other person.
•What tone did I set?
•How well did I communicate to the other’s style?
Communicate with tact and empathy
•How might results been different if I changed my style?
Change style to accommodate the situation
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Take Aways
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Toast to Leadership
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