kate schaefers, ph.d., lp jean tollefson, m.s., n.c.c. authentic renewal: cultivating wholeness in...

Kate Schaefers, Ph.D., LPJean Tollefson, M.S., N.C.C.

Authentic Renewal: Cultivating Wholeness in the

Second Half of Life

“Wholly unprepared, we embark upon the second half of life…”

“But we cannot live the afternoons of life according to the program of life’s morning…”

““Ancora Imparo”Ancora Imparo”

© Schaefers & Tollefson 2009

Drawing of Michelangelo by Voltera

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The Second Half of Life – The Second Half of Life – Shifting VisionShifting Vision

Presbyopia◦ Age related changes to

our vision◦ Usually occurs in our

40’s.◦ We become more far-

sighted.

QuickTime™ and aTIFF (Uncompressed) decompressor

are needed to see this picture.

6© Schaefers & Tollefson 2009

The Second Half of Life –The Second Half of Life –Shifting VisionShifting Vision

Shifting Inner Vision◦ Reflection◦ New Perspective◦ Seeing the world

with new eyes.

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The Second Half of Life -The Second Half of Life -Shifting Values and PurposeShifting Values and Purpose

External expansiveness Endless time Infinite options Denial of death Expecting life to happen

Internal clarity Limited time left Limited choices Personal certitude Accepting life as it happens

First Half Second Half

Frederic Hudson, Ph.D. (1999) The Adult Years: Mastering the art of self renewal.


The Second Half of Life –The Second Half of Life –Shifting Needs and PrioritiesShifting Needs and Priorities

Source: Mainiero & Sullivan, The Opt-Out Revolt

Kaleidoscope Careers

Early Career: Challenge

Mid Career:Men: AuthenticityWomen: Balance

Late Career:Men: BalanceWomen: Authenticity


Aging Gracefully - Wisdom Aging Gracefully - Wisdom SourcesSources

Role ModelsResearch FindingsCulture and FaithPersonal Wisdom


Lessons from The Blue Zones

© Schaefers & Tollefson 2009 11

The Power9

Source: Buettner, Dan (2008). The Blue Zones

Move Naturally - in activities you love

Right Outlook - have purpose, develop sense of calm

Eat Wisely - eat 20% less, avoid meat and processed foods, wine in moderation

Belong to the Right Tribe - surround yourself with “nutritious” people, make family a priority, participate in a spiritual community

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DISCUSSION: DISCUSSION: Role Models for Aging AuthenticallyRole Models for Aging Authentically

12

Think of a person who has aged in a way that you admire.

What qualities come to mind when you think of this person?

What has knowing this person evoked within you?


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Approaches to AgingApproaches to Aging

13

Warren Schmidt

“…the most you can hope for is to make some kind of

difference…but what difference have I made?”

Jimmy Carter

“…retirement years are a time to define, or redefine, a successful life, both in retrospect and for our

remaining years.”© Schaefers & Tollefson 2009


"I'm convinced that the challenge of aging isn't to stay young;

it's not only to grow old but to grow whole –

to come into your own. It's your time to embrace that challenge and figure

out who you are now that you're not who

you were." ~ Connie Goldman, p. 12

Authentic Renewal:Authentic Renewal:The ProcessThe Process

Life Review

Clarify Self (talents, passions, values)

Develop a holistic lifestyle vision for the second half of life

Consider options in context of living a balanced and holistic lifestyle in the second half of life


Life ReviewLife Review

“If a glimpse of the future is

possible, it must come from an

intimacy with the present clarified

by the great works of the past.”

~ Robert Kaplan


Clarify Self - Talents, Passions and Values

Talents - Richard Leider’s Calling CardsPassions - Ann Nelson’s Top 100Values - Frederic Hudson’s 6 Core

Values

When we live our lives in ways that express our treasured talents, connect with our true passions, and are grounded in our fundamental values, we live authentically.


TalentsTalents

“The key to acting on purpose is to

bring together the needs of the world

with our unique gifts in a vocation

– a calling.”~ Richard Leider


PassionsAnn Nelson’s Top 100

“And there, as if she had been waiting for me all those years, was Ann herself.”

~ Jenette Nelson


Hudson’s Core Values

Personal Power: Claiming Yourself

Achievement: Proving YourselfPlay & Creativity: Expressing

YourselfSearch for Meaning: Integrating

YourselfCompassion & Contribution:

Giving Yourself Intimacy: Sharing Yourself

Hudson & McLean (1995). Life launch: A passionate guide to the rest of your life.


Define a Second Half Define a Second Half LifestyleLifestyleHow do I want to live my life at this

point?

What am I doing right now to support my priorities?

What changes do I want to make to better reflect these priorities?

How can I create a holistic lifestyle that reflects who I am and how I want to live?


Creating a Lifestyle of Creating a Lifestyle of Balance and Well-BeingBalance and Well-Being

MIND: How can I appreciate and share my wisdom?

BODY: How can I develop a lifestyle based on wellness?

HEART: How can I nurture a sense of belonging in my life?

SOUL: How can I connect with my sense of purpose in life?

22 © Schaefers & Tollefson 2009

MIND: Cultivating WisdomFind Work that has

MeaningCommit to Life Long

LearningCultivate a sense of

AbundanceStrengthen Autonomy

through Wise Choices“Wisdom is the supreme partof happiness.” ~Sophocles


MIND: A Path to Wisdom The brain continually re-

sculpts itself. New brain cells form

throughout life. The brain’s emotional

circuitry matures & becomes more balanced with age.

Elders use two hemispheres more equally.

…Enhancing creativity and complex problem solving!


MIND: Appreciating and Sharing Wisdom Volunteer your time and wisdom! Take a class in something of interest. Join a book club. Take up a new hobby (e.g. piano, quilting). Write an ethical will, or your life story. Practice gratitude for the blessings of your

life. Talk with a financial planner to align your

finances with your values. Be proactive with important details of your

life - your will, living will, etc.


BODY: A Lifestyle of Wellness

Appreciate our body’s wisdom.

Be naturally active, engage your body in joyful ways (dancing, singing, stretching, laughing).

Slow down, live mindfully. Engage in things that give

you energy, vitality. Explore and create “thin

places” in your life.

We can’t choose our ancestors, but we can choose our lifestyle.

© Kate Schaefers, Ph.D., LP28 © Schaefers & Tollefson 2009

BODY: Connecting with Nature

“Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the wind longs to play with your hair.”~ Kahil Gibran


BODY: A Lifestyle Of Wellness

Incorporate mindfulness into your daily life - through prayer, reflection, meditation, breathing.

Choose daily physical activity that you enjoy - Garden, Take a walk with a friend, Try a Labyrinth.

Explore sacred places in your environment. Be active in managing your own health. Explore new ways to cook that feeds your body

& soul. Find activities that give you energy, and

incorporate them into your daily life. Spend time with people who support your

healthy lifestyle.


HEART: A Sense of BelongingAttend to Kin/FamilyNurture Relationships that

offer a sense of LoveEstablish Relationships

that offer Support Invest in Communities that

Offer Opportunities to Connect with People

© Kate Schaefers, Ph.D., LP

“A cheerful heart is good medicine.”

~ Proverbs 17:22


HEART: Sense of HEART: Sense of BelongingBelonging

Volunteer in ways that help you feel loving and giving.

Practice the art of asking for help when you need it, and accept it with grace and gratitude.

Learn to tell people in your life how important they are to you.

Connect with people who share a passion of yours, and work together for common good.

Find outlest for your creativity, and allow yourself to share this side of yourself with others.

Remain open to new relationships in your life.


SOUL: A Life of Purpose

Nurture a Rich Spiritual Life

Know What is Important, and Live with Integrity

Build a Legacy of Value

Be Committed to Growth

Your life is a sacred journey.

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SOUL: Connect with Purpose

Document your life story in a journal or scrapbook that can be shared with loved ones.

Create a vision board, or other form of “road map” to chart your life path and clarify purpose and values.

Consider sharing your gifts through volunteering.

Find ways to be more active in a spiritual community.

Take time for solitude and reflection.Remain open to the inner journey of self-

discovery, through journaling, reflection, prayer.


Contact InformationContact Information

Kate Schaefers◦www.encorelifeplanning.com◦[email protected]

Jean Tollefson◦[email protected]

Soon to be launched:www.authenticrenewal.com


kate schaefers, ph.d., lp jean tollefson, m.s., n.c.c. authentic renewal: cultivating wholeness in...

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