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This newspaper contains absolutely NO top secret information whatsoever, in any shape or form. It is strongly advised to disregard any internet-based claims to the contrary. [insert generic EYP newspaper title here] #2

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This newspaper contains absolutely NO top secret information whatsoever, in any shape or form. It is strongly advised to disregard any internet-based claims to the contrary.

[insert generic EYP newspaper title here] #2

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The Matosinhos Leaks team from left to right: El Sea, Hidden Diligence, SecretVie, Ricinberg, Fuds, Prof. Oak, Wrinkly Maple, Stormy Goat

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You are trying to request access to the archive.s of the National Security Agency.

The following information is highly confidential and secured by the United States government.

ACCESS DENIED.

User: Matosinhos LeaksPASS: *********ACCESS DENIED.

WARNING: Security breached. Reload. Root access granted in 3… 2… 1… Aceess granted.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -|DATABASE CONTENTS<<<<<

>>>> Photographic evidence [ 4 – 5 ]>>>> Speaking to the big world. Trapped in a little room. [ 6 – 8 ]>>>> Weather forecast II [ 9 ]>>>> Surviving a secret [ 10 – 11 ]>>>> FE(e)D Europe [ 12 – 13 ]>>>> António, António, where art thou António? [ 14 – 15 ]>>>> Online lives [ 16 – 17 ]>>>> Anonymous [ 18 – 19 ] >>>> Close encounters with wild HOs [ 20 – 21 ]>>>> Decoding the session [ 22 ]>>>> Now Let’s Hear It Reversed [ 23 ]>>>> Cracking the system [ 24 – 25 ]>>>> Battle Diary of the Media Team [ 26 – 27 ] c//DATABASE CONTENTS END<<<<<

log out? Y/N

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6 leaked by: WRINKLY MAPLE

JULIAN ASSANGE: SPEAKING TO THE BIG WORLD. TRAPPED IN A LITTLE ROOM.

Since it officially formed in 2007, WikiLeaks has released more classified intelligence documents than the rest of the international press combined. Here is the story of the man behind this media organisation; Julian Assange.

The same walls, morning after morning. Outside, police forces are on guard. More than five hundred days have gone by. Since mid-June 2012, when Julian Assange first sought refuge there, the Ecuadorean Embassy

has been his home and its staff members his family.

Mr Assange is being investigated by the Swedish authorities due to two sexual assault accusations. He claims both encounters were

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consensual and that the charges were politically motivated. Nevertheless, the United Kingdom’s Supreme Court ruled he should be extradited to Sweden to face questioning.

Consequently, Assange looked for the help of the Ecuadorean government, which granted him political asylum. Since he is not allowed to fly to the South American country, the Australian activist is only safe within the embassy. One step outside and he is extradited from the United Kingdom. Either way, he is already imprisoned.

Nevertheless, even prisoners can somehow be free. Confined within a restricted place, Assange devotes himself to work and works for a cause he believes in.

Described by his stepfather as a “sharp kid who always fought for the underdog”, Julian Assange had an unusual childhood with a nomadic lifestyle. At the age of sixteen, he got his first computer and soon developed sophisticated hacking activities.

Assange began to collect information from major companies’ computer systems.

By combining informatics expertise and researching skills with an ever-present focus on ethics and justice, Julian Assange was able to co-found the WikiLeaks website in 2006. The founders’ intentions were to collect and share confidential information on an international scale. When, in April 2010, footage showing US soldiers shooting dead civilians in Iraq was released, WikiLeaks made the headlines everywhere.

The website has an innovative ‘dead-letterbox’ for eventual leakers. Some of the most well-known WikiLeaks whistleblowers

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8 leaked by: WRINKLY MAPLE

include the former NSA analyst Edward Snowden and the former US Army soldier Chelsea Manning. To keep the sources safe, there is a wide variety of strategies adopted by Assange and his partners, such as encryptions and legal flexibility designed towards different national jurisdictions.

Since the rapid growth of WikiLeaks, a persistently exhaustive debate has been held. Some regard Julian Assange as a brave, upright defender of the truth; while others perceive him as an opportunist, whose actions to obtain the world’s attention

may endanger civilians. His boldness has earned him strong supporters and equally strong enemies.

It is not yet possible to precisely measure the impacts of Julian Assange’s actions; however he did sacrifice a familiar comfortable lifestyle in order to run WikiLeaks and even now, while confined, he continues to work tirelessly to make a change in the world. If nothing else, he exposes the ambivalences of our so-called free society and sets up an example for us to take an active part in our own lives.

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Join António Silva once more as he embraces the task of predicting the weather. This time, the Portuguese maritime climate will vex our coasts. Several cataclysms are expected to render the population beset by more than mere memories of rainy afternoons.

WEATHER FORECAST

20th October: - 60° C. Streets covered by an ice layer, with dangerously heavy snowfall throughout the country. Tsunami in Beja, plus avalanches in central Alentejo. Wave height estimated to reach 5mm. Eleven cyclones sent by the Spanish government will affect eastern Portugal. Another politically neutral cyclone will draw near one of them, resulting in a collision. The Prime Minister declares the state of emergency due to astonishingly bad luck.

GOVERNMENT TO DO LIST:- Do not barbecue, eat yesterday’s leftovers instead.- Go surfing and body-boarding.- Buy a bar.- Get your firearms ready for a Grand March to Madrid.- Cut off parts of your umbrella in order to reduce its weight.

leaked by: EL SEA & FUDS

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10 leaked by: WRINKLY MAPLE & HIDDEN DILIGENCE

The boat was empty. I didn’t know why, when or how. I only knew what had happened before that night.

I am a CIA agent. I was on a casual holiday cruise with my wife. It was turning out to be quite a boring experience, as we had nothing to do but walk around and look happy.

Many are the secrets of the ocean. Many more are the secrets of men. Few are the ones that get away with knowing both. Here is a testimony from one of the secret holders.

SURVIVING A SECRET

I was on leave for medical issues related to work. I had suffered a mental breakdown just 3 months earlier and was recommended a relaxing trip abroad.

Unfortunately, the sea breeze wasn’t able to clear my mind from it. I shouldn’t be talking about this, but it doesn’t matter now. One of my early missions was surveying

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Area 51’s perimeter. They always send the rookies to do that kind of job.

One day I saw something I really shouldn’t have seen. After that I had the constant feeling of being observed. The dreams are less frequent now. They somehow entangled with imagination, but at that time they were still too vivid.

We were crossing the Bermuda Triangle that night – heading to the Bahamas – when I heard what could have been a whale. A howl echoing through the walls of the boat. Siren-like. Calling.

I fell asleep surprisingly fast.

When I woke up, everything was gone. Only I and my bed were left in the enormous cruising boat. I knew they had done it. I knew it was their fault. I knew I shouldn’t have thought about speaking up. I should have known better.

I got up. My feet were numb from the terror. I didn’t know what to do. I walked down the hallway and there it was…

I had never seen it so close. After that, I fainted and woke up only months later.

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12 leaked by: SECRETVIE

Since 1942, Altiero Spinelli, famous Italian Godfather of the European Union (EU), supported the notion of a European Federation. Spinelli advocated a European Federation whereby the EU would become strong enough to build up common political, economic, defence and

legislative policy. A strong union would have a fundamental and intense impact upon the world’s existing political structure; 28 separated whispers would not have the same effect as a one and only voice. A sole voice can deal with other continents as it would be loud enough to have a proper

debate free from influences and due reverence.

Although at first sight this kind of government may seem easy to reach and too obviously convenient to be neglected, many politicians are not ready to give up national sovereignty in order to move decisional areas under European dominion. However, the aim of a federalist union is not to have the EU in charge of every matter regarding Member States, but to gain a decisional power which would allow it to have a relevant impact on common interests. Countries’ related issues would be left down to States’ competence, in order to let them administrate internal policies.

Europeans’ concern about the creation of a federation is exacerbated by the lack of a homely feeling of belonging to

The impressive word ‘federation’ may scare many potential United States of Europe citizens. Truth be told, continental citi-zens wouldn’t be the only ones preoccupied by this innovative, though oxymoronically outdated, concept.

FE(E)D EUROPE

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the continent. An existence of belonging implies the need of a common culture, language, historical background and shared traditions. Otto von Bismarck, an anti-democratic man who literally brought Germany together, once said “whoever speaks of Europe is wrong: it is a geographical expression.”

Nonetheless, this presumed merely geographical union may not be as hopeless as it seems. European citizens have to get

involved in the ever-changing process of the EU, condicio sine qua non the aim of a federation will never be achieved. If we concentrate on what divides us, we won’t be able to engage with what is waiting for us. To build the United States of Europe we need our roots in the past, our feet in the present but our minds always looking towards the future.

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14 leaked by: FUDS

Dear António,Yellow walls. Yellow walls smother my every gaze. They blind my sight. Walls are ache. Walls are eternal but inescapable; defying my sanity like sanguinary savages. Dear friend, I must ask you to leave no stone unturned to save me from this yolk.

I am bound by mind forg’d manacles. You must recall our dinners this summer. Many an evening we would converse about eating rotting flesh, or more precisely, rotten lives. It took me countless hours in my uncle’s study to fathom secrets, secrets that were to rock the world as we know it to its very core. If only it knew. With natural resources dwindling rapidly, renouncing from meat poses the last thread of hope. It takes 35 calories of fossil fuel to produce one calorie of pork. The number of calories of fossil fuel needed to produce calories of soy equals the outcome. Producing animal protein requires up to 15 times more water than plant protein. Our last thread is unravelling.

The populace has been nurturing horses of the apocalypse for generations. Eating meat is bound to drive our species extinct.

Powers possess Portugal – powers greater than any state authority or religion could ever be. António, the Portuguese sifted it out from our exchange of letters. I cannot tell who they tortured to extract the information, but they must have somehow learned that I found the ultimate truth. On 17th October they hurled all kinds of decaying flesh at me; be it pork, beef, fish, chicken, seafood or mussels. And yes, Antonio, they would not feel shame importuning me with pastries made from lives executed before they were permitted their first breath. Does being a bird’s

A letter as forwarded by nurse Ms.Costa.

ANTÓNIO, ANTÓNIO, WHERE ART THOU ANTÓNIO?

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vulnerable offspring render them less worthy of existing than the human race? I cannot tell, my friend, how they are capable of incidentally devouring the products of slaughter and bloodshed. As of today, it is beyond anybody’s power to produce meat in clinically sterile environments comparable to laboratories. Any food made from animals will contain said animals’ body waste, ranging from lactic acid to urine. Believe me, friend, they were attempting to poison my existence like theirs once was poisoned. They were attempting to vex me with osteoporosis, kidney stones, diabetes, multiple sclerosis, arthritis, intestinal toxaemia and gall stones. Fortunately, my genetic disposition seldom allows acne to burst into bloom. They would not let me leave but ‘commend’ dish after dish until I found myself sobbing for my life. For the world. For Portugal.

That is when I cried out your name. Why did you refrain from responding? Antonio, your absence continues to enrage me. Yet on that particular eve’, it was inexcusable. Every fibre of my humble existence was filled with despair, which caused me to reach for a knife placed on a table close to the entrance. Sliding it between the children’s ribs, I showed them they could be transmuted to death and decay just as easily. One regrets an innocent exodus just as much as any creature’s, or so I thought whilst yelling your name. I have heard doctors refer to you as a figment of my imagination; however, I shall give these words to the tall nurse who vowed to deliver my letters to you, my only saviour, for an insignificant sum. Salvage me from this infinite yolk.

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16 leaked by: SECRETVIE

Their days are reported, one after the other, on a public platform. The human need to show off is well known, but what strikes is the absolute disregard for privacy. They don’t realise how much they expose themselves to danger or uncomfortable situations. Facebook is also used as a way to blow off steam, which can lead to writing exaggerated posts which easily cause misunderstanding

and aggravation. Therefore, lots of delegates ought to feel threatened by our beloved social network.

Moreover, the expression “always on Facebook” could be used literally, for thanks to all the different devices we have available to us, constant social media activity is not only possible, but inescapable. Such enabling

Post, like, link, share, log in and update are the verbs the new generations use most frequently nowadays. It seems that every-thing they do or wherever they go needs to be made public, with a picture and some tags added to it of course. FACEBOOK.

ONLINE LIVES

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devices provide internet access almost everywhere, so checking notifications has become a fundamental habit, comparable to an obsession. Matosinhos Leaks has found scientific evidence to suggest it is categorically impossible for a teenager to survive a day without having logged in on Facebook at least once. Delegates have confirmed this theory by showing signs of Facebook addiction – they can’t even count the hours they spend online, for they are constantly active.

The last question the delegates have been asked by the agents of Matosinhos Leaks is whether they find Facebook useful or a hindrance to efficient use of time. The agents have reported a reasonably balanced response, although Matosinhos Leaks strongly believes the idea of surfing on Facebook is not a proper way to spend afternoons. The most famous social network in the world has many admirers, but perhaps it only highlights faces and destroys books.

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18 leaked by: PROF. OAK

Anonymous is an organisation which promotes online operations all over the world. Such ‘online operations’ are usually less euphemistically reported as ‘hacking’. The members of the organisation frequently state their distaste for the word ‘hacker’ and its derivatives, owing to its depreciative connotations. Instead, Anonymous members prefer to call themselves ‘hacktivists’.

Anonymous tends to carry out large-scale operations against governmental or military databases, based on the idea that information is free and free for all. Anonymous customarily hacks trough the most impenetrable defence systems in the planet and subsequently publishes any discovered information online, so that everyone’s eyes are open to the content of such databases.The word Anonymous derives

from two sources. Firstly, the idea of having an unknown global agent that fights for free information. Secondly, the organisation adopted the ‘Guy Fawkes mask’ as their symbol. The mask represents combating unfairness, endorsing remorseful penitence, creating a sense of awareness and, most importantly, the idea that what matters is what the agent does and why, not who the agent is. Anonymous is an organisation of individuals who fight for their ideals in an organised way.

This is not a behind-closed-doors group filled to the brim with secrecy. In fact, one of its main peculiarities is that anyone and everyone can join the movement. If you share the organisation’s values and beliefs you can participate as an active member and eventually join their online and offline protests

Everyone has heard of Anonymous for some reason or another. But, what actually is Anonymous? What do they do, how do they do it, and why? We are about to find out.

ANONYMOUS

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and virtual assaults. If you would prefer to stay at home but still contribute to the functioning of the organisation, you can just log

into their website, download their software and allow your computer to work for Anonymous at a distance. This aids Anonymous in the processing and cracking of advanced security systems. This inclusive characteristic provides the organisation with an astonishingly favourable

public opinion, as the average person in the street tends to think of Anonymous as a people’s organisation.

No matter whether people love it or not, Anonymous is here to stay and will continue to torment governments and advanced online protection companies for years to come.

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20 leaked by:EL SEA & HIDDEN DILIGENCE

Matosinhos Leaks (ML) - What would you do if you were to be a shy albino octopus?Margarida (M) - I guess I would only swim in the low waters of the ocean and probably organise an EYP session in the sea.João (J) - I would hide and paint myself black.

ML - If you were to organise a National Selection Conference (NSC) and you could only pick four objects or people to help you, what would you get?M - A person, a computer, cookies and Red Bull.J - Dona Fernanda, a cell phone, my mother and Red Bull.

We happened to find the Head Organisers (HOs) of the 29th NSC of EYP Portugal lurking around, and luckily we had some questions for them. Discover more about the masterminds behind the session; Margarida and João.

CLOSE ENCOUNTERS WITH WILD HOs

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ML - What do you think the word pünktliclikeitsfanatiker means?M - A fanatic cat that punches other cats.J - A punctuality fanatic.ML - Would you prefer to be a superhero or a ninja? Why?M - A ninja. I could do everything without being seen.J - I’m already a ninja, so superhero.

ML - List some of the feelings you have been experiencing in the last few days.M - I have been feeling excited, tired and hungry.J - Joy, anger, suicidal tendencies and happiness.

ML - Which part of Kris’ body do you love the most?J - His big left foot heel; he does some very cool stuff with it. M - His face, because when he laughs he looks like the Chinese meme.

ML - Do you know that you have been forever immortalised by a song? How do you feel about that?M - It is João’s fault; I’m not responsible for you doing this to us. The thing is, how do you know that song?J - I feel in my natural habitat because I’m a HO.

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22 leaked by: EL SEA & WRINKLY MAPLE

Delegates: 69 – (Coincidence?)Officials: 31 Venues: 6Packages of post-its: 52Markers: 31Animals hurt for the session preparation: πCookies eaten during the session: 267Cookies retrieved by session participants for solving “The Meaning”: 2Phone calls answered by João: >1 per 5 minutesNumber of HOs jokes: Infinite.Hours of sleep for the Media Team: ridiculously fewUFOs seen during the session: 1 (in João’s dreams)Open Debate points: 199Metrical awesomeness of our Session President: OVER 9000!

The enigmatic Media Team used their hacking wizardry to crack the computer system of this session. 13847137tyfhqbsnagry13ur-falei231hrig35g34y2rh13b8; this encrypted code gave us some confidential data, while the rest was violently extracted from our HO João Moreira.

DECODING THE SESSION

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‘Backmasking’ is a recording technique in which a sound or message is recorded backwards on to a track that is meant to be played forward. The Beatles were great enthusiasts of this innovative musical method and their message “...the sun shines. Rain. When the rain comes, they run and hide their heads”, heard in ‘Rain’, is one of the earliest recorded instances of backmasking.

Following The Beatles notable publicising of the technique, backmasking became common practice for heavy metal bands, especially satanic backmasking. Infamous messages include; “Satan moves through our voices” in ‘Snowblind’, by The Styx; ”Here’s to my sweet Satan” in ‘Stairway to Heaven’, by Led Zeppelin and virtually the entire ‘Hell Awaits’ album, by Slayer. There are also many accusations of satanic backmasking that derive only from the fertile imagination of fans or haters. For example, some people claim that in the opening song of Pokemon, “gotta catch ‘em all” played backwards is “I love Satan”.

However, there is happiness in backmasking too. Franz Ferdinand wanted to do the exact opposite of satanic backmasking and include the most positive thing they could think of. They decided to use backmasking in the song ‘Michael’, with a reference to the bassist’s homesickness while the album was being recorded (“she’s worried about you, call your mother”). Another example is in the song ‘Empty Spaces’, by Pink Floyd, where they congratulate the attentive audience for discovering the secret message. The finely tuned listeners are instructed to send answers to the message to “the Old Pink” (a possible reference to Syd Barret).

Positive backmasking is slowly dismantling the popular prejudice that this technique is only used to reinforce negative messages. It shows us another side of music – a more sentimental, more intimate and more thoughtful side, where musicians offer advice to their fans or talk about the sort of topics their labels don’t permit.

So, next time you are listening to your favourite song, play it backwards and see what happens.

Have you been hearing strange messages in your MP3 tracks? Maybe some peculiar background noise in your favourite song? Yup. You just got backmasked.

NOW LET’S HEAR IT REVERSED

leaked by: HIDDEN DILIGENCE

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24 leaked by: WRINKLY MAPLE, FUDS, PAPA

Government Report on Portuguese regulatory gaps in its legal system

The restrictive nature of the Portuguese legal system merely allows for cases explicitly mentioned in its statutes to be subject to criminal and civil liability. By argumentum a fortiori, all that is not forbidden is legal, until the legislator decides to change the situation by passing another law.

Every legal system is bound to feature unintentional regulatory gaps. The mills of legislation grind slowly.

An elaborate scheme of skilful espionage allowed Matosinhos Leaks to gain access to top secret information that is kept in the dark by the government. The following information is disclosed not to incentivise young impressionable minds to break the law, but rather to unearth the truth.

CRACKING THE SYSTEM

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In Portugal, any interpretation and application of vague phrases is obliged to abide by the following maxims; has a Portuguese court decided on a comparable case in the past? Which solution would be equitable? What would the legislator opt for, regarding this particular state of facts? Well, the mills of jurisdiction grind even more slowly.

1. Narcotic prohibitionAs of the current situation, secondary drugs are sold on the Portuguese market. Since the legislation only prohibits specific substances, the narcotics laboratories continuously find new chemical products. These alternative legal drugs have shown to often entail even more severe damages than their illegal counterparts.

2. TaxationThe so-called creative accounting makes it possible for some agents to take advantage of the fiscal system. There are wider companies which pay much less in taxes than smaller ones.

They manage to do so by manipulating their accounting or ‘cooking the books’, as it is commonly referred to. One of the most recurring tactics is reallocating profits. Countless global players have set up subsidiary companies to “invest” large sums in, thus avoiding the tax rates that would otherwise apply in accordance with the size of their profits.

Therefore, the Department of Justice urges the regulatory bodies to close the aforementioned loopholes within one year. We insist that the information exposed must not be disclosed to the public.

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26 leaked by: EL SEA

Short and long range transmissions are no longer safe; the government is probably monitoring all communications in the area. The Media Team is now isolated from society and overall danger. A new way of communicating with exterior sources must be found in order to keep information sources available and to maintain the team’s effectiveness.

This morning we installed a new heat absorption system in the room so as to camouflage the team’s heat signature. We had been informed by exterior

Government task forces are coming close to finding our new secret headquarters. Satellite images show unusual movement near the Media Team room, thus making special-ops teams alert to abnormal presences in the area. Two days ago our hideout was compromised as secret intelligence services raided the facility, forcing us to either destroy or remove all relevant and

dangerous material collected to date. This catastrophic scenario cannot be repeated, the new HQ must be secured at all costs.

Sunday, 20th October 2013

BATTLE DIARY OF THE MEDIA TEAM

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sources that intelligence units were to scout the area with heat, sound and movement detectors.The main problem is food, as maintaining our headquarters in a remote location does not allow us to have nice meals and good coffee breaks. Canned meat and dry bread are now part of our everyday diet. Water is also a critical factor now, as the government asked for a total water supply block in the area because of their suspicions.

The general effectiveness of the campaign is very satisfactory,

otherwise the government and external bodies would not be investing so much effort in shutting us down. As long as the facilities are not compromised and no dangerous situations emerge, the Media Team will effectively serve its purpose.

For the next couple of days the Media Team will try to achieve all of its main goals whilst maintaining the entire operation’s secrecy. We can only hope the editing team and the journalists make it out of the operation unharmed.

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