Jiniya AfrozePhD Research Student

The Open University, UK

Influences of

birth orders in

children’s

wellbeing

in Bangladesh

Pathways to Resilience IV: Global South Perspectives, 14-16 June 2017, Cape Town, South Africa

Presentation overview• Introduction and context

• Research setting

• Methods

• (Ongoing) findings

• Preliminary discussions

Donovan, B./Namati (Photographer) 2014, 11 August. 'Stranded Pakistanis' living in camps in Bangladesh – in

pictures. Retrieved from: https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/gallery/2014/aug/11/stranded-

pakistanis-camps-bangladesh-bihari-in-pictures

Introduction and context

Research setting

Donovan, B./Namati (Photographer) 2014, 11 August. 'Stranded Pakistanis' living

in camps in Bangladesh – in pictures. Retrieved from:

https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/gallery/2014/aug/11/stranded-

pakistanis-camps-bangladesh-bihari-in-pictures

Methods

– Ethnographic fieldwork

– 70 children from 5-18 years, 60 adults

including parents and community

members and key influential people

(Ongoing) findings

Experiences of birth order

• Attention and care in relation to birth order– Being the top in the birth order hierarchy has advantages in receiving more

care from the parents

– Reciprocal nature of attention and care between adults and children

• ‘they [the adults in the family] love me so much! Isn’t it my responsibility

then to take care of my younger siblings? I do this with joy – why would I

feel annoyed?’ (Rashida 15, oldest)

– Attention is not always related to birth order as older children often feel that

they receive less attention and care than their younger siblings

• ‘Sometimes I feel why am I the oldest one?’ (Meghla 10, oldest)

– Being the middle one is ‘complete losses’ (Shefali 16, middle)

– Being the youngest has its advantages as well – ‘I have someone to look up

to’ (Jui 14, youngest)

Experiences of birth order

• Knowledge of the wider world – ‘I share everything to my younger sister. Everything – about my life, what I

have learned from my experiences, what I have learned from others –

everything. I really enjoy this when I see that I could influence others in any

shape or form. It really feels good when I see that others are doing well. I

take this as a challenge. Say I have learned something, I share this to

another child. She will pass it through to someone else. That child might

share this to another child. I get lots of fun in rolling the cycle of knowledge

sharing among the children in the community. I just wish that every children

in the community keep safe and well’. (Nishi 16, oldest)

Experiences of birth order

• An absence of an older sister and importance of having

a role model – ‘Shima Apu became my saviour. She is more than my elder sister. Shima

Apu helped me to love myself again. She gave me the courage to raise my

voice. I realized that I need to look after my protection. One day I could

share this to my parents. Now I feel much safer. Every children should have

an older sister like Shima Apu. Now I feel much better when I share

protective behaviour messages with other children in the camp’. (Nishi 16,

oldest)

– ‘My younger siblings will stroll the path that I take. If I take a wrong path,

they will follow the same. They would say, ‘it is OK for us to go wrong – as

our eldest sister has done the same’. (Nishi 16, oldest)

Experiences of birth order

• Learning from siblings’ mistakes– ‘Diba has done a mistake. We don’t want to have the same fate as hers. She

also says, ‘don’t do the same mistake as I did’. Why does she say so? When

an elder sister sees some prickles on the road, only then she advises her

younger sisters that, ‘don’t take that road, there are prickles on the road’. I

have learned this from my sister. We don’t want to repeat what happened to

our elder sister’. (Ratri 16, middle)

Responsibilities

• A growing sense of independence

– ‘My parents always remind me

that, ‘you are the eldest son,

and you need to take the

responsibility of the family

soon’. I enjoy how my parents

are helping me to become

responsible. I feel a sense of

authority because of their

expectations. They have raised

me up. Isn’t it my responsibility

now to do something for them?

I need to take responsibility of

my siblings too!’ (Shimanto 16,

oldest)

Responsibilities

• Overstrained with responsibilities

‘I am not afraid of being beaten or smacked.

What else they (the parents) can do with me? I

am just afraid of domestic chores. I don’t like

the washing-up… it’s so greasy! I flee from this.

I need to enjoy the work I do, right? I don’t like

washing-up at all! … My mom forces me to

work, she smacks me. So I have to do the

washing-up too… I do and I cry! … There is no

way around. I don’t like it. Do the washing-up…

fetch water… you have seen from how far I

need to fetch water! I bring almost 10 vessels

(50 litres) every day. If there were taps inside

the home, then I could just wash-up with the

running water. There is no tap even. Then you

need to carry water with buckets… bring it from

a distance…. And then do the washing-up.’

(Meghla 10, oldest)

Responsibilities

• Siblings as emotional support– ‘I keep all my hitches to myself. I don’t share this to my mom or my younger

sisters. I listen to my younger sisters as they share their issues. But I never

share anything to my mom as she gets over stressed. She is already over

overburdened with lots of family issues – poverty, laid off husband,

vagabond son, three marriageable daughters and what not. I take all the

stress to myself and relief my mother from this additional stress of us’.

(Shiuly 18, middle).

Responsibilities

• Reciprocal relationship of support– ‘It doesn’t matter that they are young. I am always very open to learn from

my younger siblings. I feel very proud when I see that I can learn something

from my younger siblings –they might be younger than me, but they might

have more knowledge and experience than me on certain issues’. (Nishi 16,

oldest)

Responsibilities

• Sacrificing aspirations– ‘My parents have looked after me for so many years… I have decided that I

can give a few years gap in studies, and if I want I can start again. I can

resume my studies anytime, but my younger siblings need to continue for a

few more years… We are not only siblings, we are more like friends’. (Jewel

18, oldest)

– ‘If my mom had the ability, then surely she would send me school again.

How far she can manage herself? My elder brothers are not doing anything.

If they had some earnings, then I could ask my mother to send me back to

school. [Since my father’s death] she has to go outside to work. Should I

leave the domestic chores for her? I can’t be only self-serving. I should look

after my mom and my siblings too! Shouldn’t I? (Shajeda 12, middle)

Agency and power

• Power and autonomy with birth orders– ‘My younger sisters get lots of love. They get money (from my parents) too,

to buy sweets and snacks. I get nothing. I don’t even get time to play. My

mom doesn’t allow me to go out to play. I often pinch my sister. Hahaha. She

starts crying and then my mom asks me to take her out. I like it when she

asks me to do so. They can play outside. I too get the chance to play’,

(Meghla 10, oldest)

– ‘Doesn’t she require to learn domestic chores? Can she survive with

academic knowledge only? Won’t she have to marry one day? Who will do

her chores then? Will I?’ (Ratri 16, middle)

– ‘My brothers don’t let me go out of the home, they say only bad girls roam

around in the street. I don’t want to upset them. I am too scared to lose their

love and care. I do what they ask me to do’. (Taslima 14, middle)

Agency and power

• Reliance on fate and god– ‘Whatever is written on fate will happen. It is not nice to leave house too! I am a girl.

If I leave home then people will say badly about me. I will not have any self-respect.

Respect and honour are important in life. If respect and honour are gone from life

then there will be nothing left. I need to lead the life as Allah directs. There is no hope

in life. What can bring hope in life? People have hopes from brothers, sisters, and

parents. There is no hope in myself. What shall I hope for myself? Nothing will

change. As I will grow-up… I will study, I will do work, only then I would be able to

stand on my own feet. Then I won’t have to listen to anyone else. If my mom says

something, I will be grownup by then, and I would be able to find a solution. Now I

am younger. But actually I think like a grownup’. (Shajeda 12, middle)

Ongoing discussions• Children’s relationships with their siblings are ‘actively constructed by the children

themselves’ and these are both ‘patterned and diverse’ (Edwards et al. 2005)

• Even though children reflected on power and autonomy related to birth order, there is no

fixed hierarchy in practice, which are negotiated and contested (Finch and Mason 1993)

• Siblings can be both a source of support system and source of tensions, which are not

necessarily related to their birth orders only (Dewhurst et al. 2015).

• Reciprocal nature of support system between siblings (Punch 2005)

• Siblings often engage in strategic interactions between them to negotiate their agencies

in the relationships (McIntosh and Punch, 2009)

• There is no fixed pattern that exist in expectations of roles and responsibilities of siblings

according to birth order, the patterns are rather fluid which are related to their age,

gender, sibling composition and parental financial condition among others (Punch 2009)

• Reliance on religion and fate (Eggerman and Panter-Brick 2010)

To conclude• Birth orders are not necessarily hierarchical, rather they are

negotiated and contested through children’s everyday

experiences

• Children can exercise their agencies to perform and negotiate

their relationships with their siblings.

• Families and communities need to acknowledge the diversities

among individuals and celebrate the agencies of children to have

a situated understanding about how children explore and promote

their wellbeing.

Jiniya AfrozeFaculty of Wellbeing, Education and Language

Studies

The Open University

Walton Hall

Milton Keynes

MK7 6AA

jiniya.afroze@open.ac.uk

This project is supervised by Dr. Heather Montgomery

This project is funded by CREET, The Open University, UK

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