Issue No . 514 F r i d a y . 23rd March . 1979

T H E N E W S P A P E R O F I M P E R I A L C O L L E G E

TOTAL BOYCOTT! Students Urged to Eat Elsewhere Next Term The Un ion is mount ing a continuous boycott of all College

student refectories f r o m the start of next t e rm.

Th i s drastic action is a Un ion Meeting 's response to the

latest 4 per cent pr ice r ise and the certainty of large month ly

price increases to follow.

A n Emergency Un ion Meet ing to be held on the first

Thur sday next t e r m wi l l also consider a proposa l to withdraw

Un ion cooperation f r o m College's " M e e t - I C " day.

T h e U n i o n Execut ive has made no f i rm plans for the provis ion of

alternative food but was wa i t i ng to see the response to yesterday's

boycott. They are urg ing a l l students to arrange to eat outside Col lege

or b r ing sandwiches. Lists of restaurants near Col lege w i l l be avai lable .

Faced w i th the prospect of a 10 Col lege might have done better

per cent refectory price rise in 5 to close these as wel l , for very few-

months and the constant refusal of

Col lege to consider the U n i o n ' s

v i ews , the U n i o n M e e t i n g

decided that an al l -out boycott

was the only way left to force

Col lege to listen to the students.

T h e success of the act ion now

depends on a l l students observ ing

the boycott.

T h e " M e e t I C " day, to be held

on 2nd M a y , is being organised by

Col lege to improve . relations

between Col lege and the local

communi t y . Abou t 300 local

residents w i l l be inv i ted to see the

Col lege and several U n i o n

Societies have been asked to

provide exhibits. The re w i l l also

be a social meet ing between the

visitors and s ta l l ' and students.

U n i o n P r e s i d e n t M a r y

A t t e n b o r o u g h has a l r e a d y

wr i t ten to the societies involved

a s k i n g t h e m to c o n s i d e r

w i t h d r a w i n g from the scheme if

the U n i o n M e e t i n g decides not to

p a r t i c i p a t e . S e v e r a l U n i o n

activists believe that Col lege

wou ld be very annoyed by

student noncooperat ion.

In response to yesterday's one-

da)' boycott of a l l refectories

C o l l e g e c l o s e d S o u t h s i d e

refectory d u r i n g lunch and

s u p p e r , l e a v i n g o n l y th ree

refectories for the U n i o n to picket.

lunches were served. By 1.30 p m

only 17 customers had entered the

U n i o n r e f e c t o r y a n d a n

alternative food service was do ing

wel l .

T h e Sherf ie ld Buttery was

deserted except for one customer

at 12.30, normal l y the peak lunch

t ime per iod. In contrast a long-

queue had formed for U n i o n -

prov ided alternative food in the

J u n i o r C o m m o n R o o m .

Depar tmenta l Representat ive

C h r i s H u n t reported that he had

taken over £50 for food such as

sausages and hamburgers. H i s

comment : " I t is busier than

Sa insbury ' s " .

Downsta irs in the Sherf ield

L o w e r Refectory only 6 people

were eat ing at 1.10 p.m. A lew

more bad got in earl ier due to a

slow start to p icket ing at 12.00.

but U n i o n Secretary M i k e E l k i n

said that on ly 12 people had got

past h im at one door of the

refectory. K i r s l e n Pratt p icket ing

at the ma in Consort Ga l l e ry

entrance said that most people

had been turned away.

T h e one-day boycott has been a

great success, exceeding a i l but

the most opt imist ic predict ions

and there now is every ind icat ion

that next term's cont inuous

boycott w i l l be successful.

The Union Lower Refectory at 1.15 pm during yesterday's boycott

C O U N C I L R E P O R T The Union is asking College to buy more houses for student

accommodation and to set up head tenancy schemes.

IC Union Council, meeting on Monday, heard that the University

Grants Committee is unable to give College any more money for

accommodation. The meeting passed a motion asking College to use

any money available for investment to purchase the freehold or

leasehold of houses and suggested that College could use Housing

Corporation finance to build or convert property through a Housing

Association.

Col l ege is cons ider ing tak ing up a head tenancy in property in

Lexham Gardens. C o u n c i l empowered the Un ion Execut ive to enter

s u c h a scheme on the Un ion ' s behalf if Co l l ege cannot be persuaded to

go ahead.

Posts Filled

Fol lowing Sheyne Lucock ' s resignat ion C o u n c i l e lected J o h n

Passmore as Ac t ing External Affairs Officer. J o h n Passmore has

already been elected External Affairs Officer for next year in a vote at

last week's Un ion Meet ing.

Deputy President Ma l co lm Bra in is to fill the posts of C o u n c i l Cha i rman and student representative on Co l lege 's Govern ing Body,

.contd. on back page

Page 2

L E T T E R S • Dear Sir , - 1. So! O u r noble

President, Miss M a r y At tenbor­

ough ehose to ca l l quo rum at the

last U G M ( M a r c h 8th) s imply

because she d idn ' t l ike the motion

which was on the verge of being

passed. H o w sickening! The irony

w a s t h a t M a d e m o i s e l l e

At tenborough's election posters

were displayed up at the front,

and the word 'Democracy ' was

prominent on them. She knew

what k ind of a U n i o n she was

going to be president of, and she

still chose to stand. S imply

because she doesn't approve ol

what the majority of students here

feel does not absolve her from

act ing in accordance with those

wishes. Q u o r u m ca l l ing is a l l good

fun, but not when it comes from

the president. It is a pity that

someone who has proved to be so

beneficial to I C U , and has shown

herself to be genuinely concerned

wi th the welfare of most of her

subjects, should be responsible lor

such per l id i ty .

2. W i l l no th ing placate WTSc. (or

W I S T or P I S T or whatever they

cal l themselves nowadays)!? The

male strippers were inserted for

their t i t i l la t ion, but they ' l l be

p icket ing as usual. I presume they

just like p icket ing for picketings

sake (maybe they hope to be

picked up?). II, as I assume, the

majority of these pickets are the

type that attend the Women 's

s e l f - d e f e n c e c l a s s e s y o u r

i l lustrious pub l i ca t ion advertises,

then I should like to volunteer my

services as a would-be assailant. I

can guarantee a very realistic

performance.

I have the honour to be Sir , in

eager ant ic ipat ion ofthe return of

T h e T imes, your most obed iem

and obsequious servant,

Shlomo Gods i M E II

Dear J o h n , - I feel perhaps that I

should say a few things about the

m a n y i n s u l t s , a t t a c k s etc

launched at me in last week^

F E L I X . Perhaps 1 w i l l taxe them

in order of importance.

F i rst ly I dislike intensely being

cal led 'M i ss ' . I Know that most

people do this in order to annoy

me and I can only admi t that it

succeeds in do ing so. I see no

reason at a l l why a woman should

be forced to proc la im her mar i ta l

status as though it were of pr ime

importance whether or not she

has got a ' ful l time* man. (A

woman without a man is like a fish

without a bicycle - to quote my

favourite saying). Fo r people who

finds M s . totally unpronouncab le

or lor other reasons unacceptable

( a l t h o u g h its a c c e p t e d for

registration at Col lege and for

... passport purposes) you are

perfectly entit led to ca l l me M a r y .

If you feel this is border ing on

being fr iendly towards me you

can always ca l l me " t h i n g y " .

A few people attack me for not

behav ing the way that a president

is supposed to. M y major problem

is that I think the concept of a

president, as many see it, is

h ierarchica l and therefore not

very nice. I d idn ' t really realise I

d idn ' t agree wi th the concept of

being president unt i l I was elected

and I thought that maybe people

wouldn ' t notice. As far as I am

concerned I am just another

U n i o n member who happens to

do a full t ime job for the U n i o n .

Con t ra ry to popular belief you get

absolutely no privileges (except

the odd free dinners) by being

president certainly no greater

power (nor should you do). I

therefore object to the fact of

hav ing a l l the disadvantages of

be ing president (like work ing

most evenings and bits of

weekends) and also hav ing my

rights as a ord inary U n i o n

member taken away from me.

A n y U n i o n M e m b e r can cal l

quo rum at a U n i o n meeting and

also campa ign for someone to be

elected to any post in the union

(they can also commit slander as

long as they pay their own legal

costs).

II every time someone called

quo rum they went out and d id a

lot of work to make sure the next

meeting to discuss the subject was

quorate as I d id , I can see no

grounds at a l l for compla int . I

certainly don't ca l l quo rum

indiscr iminate ly - in fact once in

six "years - and it was based on a

personal decision that such an

important decision - invo lv ing the

issue of vast repression in South

Afr ica , cou ld not be taken at an

inquorate meeting.

M a n y p e o p l e c h a l l e n g e

q u o r u m just because they are

oored wi th a subject and can't be

bothered to argue it out. I can

understand getting annoyed with

someone in such circumstances - it

has happened to motions I

support a l l the time. But I have

never been self righteous about

my feeling annoyed. Anyone can

cal l quo rum whenever they like.

W e can only ask them to be

responsible.

M a r k C i egg is obviously

completely unable to read or pay

attention to U C M ' s because I

disagreed wi th the Ireland mot ion

enough to have a written

amendment wh i ch I spoke to a i

the meeting. Furthermore , I am

not out of touch wi th U n i o n

members, I just don ' t necessarily

#gree wi th them! Th is is not a

change. I have always supported

lost causes at U n i o n meetings -

be ing in a minor i ty posit ion does

not frighten me. Surely I have the

right as a U n i o n member to put

forward my own personal views as

long as my actions as U n i o n

President are based on concern

for U n i o n pol icy and as long as I

make every possible effort to

inform the U n i o n of what is being

done on their behalf. Tha t is what

I meant by my election slogans lor

a compaign ing , democrat ic and

informed U n i o n .

I d id support an election

candidate. I do not believe that

U n i o n members are total sheep

w h o f o l l o w w h a t " h i g h e r

au tho r i t y " tells them (and if they

are it's about time somebody

educated them out of it). I have

campaigned for Presidential

candidates for the last 3 vears

(1976 N ige l M i l l e r got 130 votes,

1977 Peter C h a l k got 260 votes

and me in 1978 got 1023 votes)

mostly unsuccessfully.

Yours non-hierarchica l ly ,

Thingy

Maths P G

Dear Sir , - W e wou ld like to make

our views on South A f r i ca quite

clear:

(i) W e wouldn ' t work there

(ii) L i k e any fundamental

injustice we hope apartheid soon

comes to an end.

W e were obviously glad to sec

our proposal on job recruitment

passed at the last U . G . M .

However we felt it was not

interpreted in the spirit it was

intended and therefore thought it

was necessary to make known the

points above.

Yours sincerely,

M a r k Clegg

M . Cor r i gan

Dear Sir , -1 write to answer M i c k

Berry 's letter in last week's

F E L I X about I .C. Rad io ' s recent

programme changes. I am

pleased to see that he is

concerned, even though he does

not agree wi th our pol icy. The

changes followed many long

discussions (late into the night!)

w i th in the station. W e felt the

spec i a l i s t p r o g r a m m e s were

creat ing much negative feedback

wi th little positive response.

Because our potential audience

is smal l , we must be sure that any

minor i ty programme reaches a

large port ion of that minor i ty .

Th i s d id not appear to be

happening. Fo r example, Opus

301, our classical slot, could not

compete w i th the wider scope and

superior sound qual i ty of R a d i o 3.

R 'n B, disco, heavy metal , and

U . S . Rock can a l l be heard in our

general programming .

M r . Berry is unfair in ca l l ing

our output "mindless p o p " . T h e

station's presenters have a great

deal of i nd i v idua l choice as to

what music they play, and I feel

that this gives a far wider range of

musical styles than on most other

Bri t ish radio stations.

The station's aims, set out in

our consti tut ion, are: to provide

an immediate news service, to

relay informat ion of college

events, and to entertain hal l

residents. In order to achieve the

first two of these, we must i iave a

reasonable number of listeners.

C o n s e q u e n t l y , o u r g e n e r a l

programmes are directed at the

widest audience possible.

Since the changes, we have

been g iv ing more attent ion to

good non-music programmes,

such as our extensive coverage of

the sabbat ical elections, and we

intend to expand further in this

direct ion. Next term we are

r e p e a t i n g C a p i t a l R a d i o ' s

excellent documentary "Bedsi t

J u n g l e " , to help listeners find

acommodat ion next session.

I hope M i c k now understands

the reasons for these changes; I

wou ld be pleased to discuss any of

these points w i th h i m if he should

so wish.

Yours sincerely,

John Al len,

Station Manager, I.C. Radio

Dear Sir , - It has been brought to

o u r a t t e n t i o n that b l a t a n t

d iscr iminat ion is being practised

by the Col lege authorit ies. F r o m

deep w i th in us we feel that this

uncomfortable predicament must

be brought to the surface. It

appears that most of the mens'

toilets in college are suppl ied wi th

hard scratchy (and noisy) toi let,

paper, whi le most o f the womens

are provided with soft, p ink, two-

ply toilet tissue (except in Botany -

are they hardened to it?)

W e men must not sit id ly by

and let this sexism pass unnot iced.

Let those of us of a senstive nature

stand up and lodge a protest.

W i t h the back ing of a mass

movement a mot ion cou ld be

presented to a U G M and an

attempt made to rectify this harsh

situation.

Yours etc.

N. Mor ton B iochem P G

A. Walker C h e m P C

Dear M r . Har r i s , - O n e at my

agents informs me that doubt has

been cast on my existence. I refer,

of course, to the letter of J a n

Czernuszka wh i ch appeared in

your esteemed organ last week.

M y existence is beyond doubt,

and furthermore, when the t ime is

right, I shall be swept into power

by the mul t i tude of my faithful

supporters and shall immediate ly

institute a change in the 'fabric of

our society'.

M a y such mindless cloons as

M r . Czernuszka take warn ing .

Yours in ind ignat ion,

Jan Czernuska

Dear Sir , - Rastus has noticed that

b ig white chief J o h n Har r i s has

been censoring his articles. B i g

white chief J o h n Har r i s had

better stop do ing this otherwise he

w i l l either;

(i) be made to play a frame of

snooker against A l Leclez io , when

A l is in one of his better ("I can't

play on this table! A n y other

table! any other table ! " ) moods,

or

(i i ) b e come R a s t u s ' E a s t e r

Sunday lunch .

Yours sincerely,

R a s t u s A d o l f N a p o l e o n

Odinga Odinga

MORE LETTERS PAGE 6

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Page 4

W H A T ' S ONI FRIDAY 23rd March

CLUB ACTIVITY

IMPERIAL C O L L E G E C H R I S T I A N U N I O N M A I N M E E T I N G - 6.30 pm.

Mus i c Room, Assoc . Studies Bui ld ing , 53 Pr inces Gate.

MISCELLANEOUS

A L T E R N A T I V E P R O S P E C T U S W E E K E N D - 7 p.m..FELIX office. You

too can be a super-hero. Learn how to produce a masterpiece in 72

hours.

S A T U R D A Y 24th March

MISCELLANEOUS

A L T E R N A T I V E P R O S P E C T U S W E E K E N D - A l l Weekend. FELIX

Office. Past ing up of AP . You too can produce a book in one weekend.

S U N D A Y 25th March

MISCELLANEOUS

A L T E R N A T I V E P R O S P E C T U S W E E K E N D - A l l Weekend. FELIX

Office. F in ish ing off the A P . You too can see the final touches to this

work of art.

M O N D A Y 2nd Apri l

MISCELLANEOUS

P O S T G R A D U A T E S ' P L O U G H M A N ' S L U N C H -12.30. S e n i o r C o m m o n

Room, Un ion Bui ld ing . 50 p. Real Ale, Bread, Cheese , Sausages, Pickle

etc. T ickets from Jen in the Un ion Office.

T H U R S D A Y 26th Apri l

CLUB ACT IV ITY

M O P S O C L E C T U R E - b y Dr. H .R .A l l an . T i t le to be announced Seewa l l

posters. 1-15 p.m. Phys ics L.T.3.

R E S U L T S O F S N O O K E R C L U B A . G . M .

Next year's committee w i l l be (by the grace o f the examiner) ;

Rastus ' l ingo, (with translat ion in brackets),

Emperor : Rastus A d o l f Napo leon O d i n g a O d i n g a

(President: Sanjit Teelock, M a t h s II)

Poet Laureate : M . Proudiove

(Vice-Pres: M a r t i n Proudiove , Ae ro I)

L e v i Strauss Representative: S. Jeans

(Hon. S e c : Steve Jeans, Physics 1)

M in toe : D . Nut tal l

(Treasurer: Dave N u t t a l l , M a t h s II)

Of f ic ial D o u g Mount j o y Opponent : G . M a c h i n

(Publ ic i ty Officer: Ga re th M a c h i n . Physics I)

O R D I N A R Y C O M M I T T E E M E M B E R S :

Twat : A . C a m e r o n A l ex C a m e r o n (Phys. 1)

Wurze l : C . Calver t Chr i s Calver t (Phys. 1)

Looney: U l u C h a m p Geoff K e y m e r (Maths 2)

H a p p y Easter to a l l members of the c lub (my chi ldren) . I am a bit

short of food at the moment, so why don ' t you come up and see me some

time, otherwise, I w i l l have to eat Lec l ez io/T ip toes/Stroppy , and I'

don't l ike a lot of fat on my meat!

R a s t u s ( The s l a v e w h o b e c a m e a n e m p e r o r )

IC Go Club F o u r i n t r e p i d m e m b e r s o f wins. D a n M o o r e (15 kyu) scored

I .C . G o C l u b v e n t u r e d t o the one w in and I managed two (but

a c a d e m i c b l e a k n e s s o f the game I lost was a disaster!). T o

C h u r c h i l l C o l l e g e , C a m b r i d - save embarrassment I won't give

g e t o c o m p e t e i n t h e R i c h a r d Cant ' s result - but he d id

" T r i g a n t i u s M e m o r i a l G o beat me easily on the t ra in

T o u r n a m e n t " l a s t S a t u r d a y . journey there! C h u r c h i l l Col lege

has a jinx on h im : to wh i ch college

Tha t is, o fcourse, irrelevant to d id he app ly lor U . G . admission?

Saturday 's 3-round tournament F ina l l y , if you have any

wh ich began less than an hour inc l inat ion to be on next year's

late (surprise!.). A t the end of the committee (President, Secretary

day's play N ige l A rno t (11 kyu) or T r e a s u r e r ) p lease d o n ' t

had succeeded in getting a prize (1 hesitate to contact R . J . Can t ,

assume, since I left before the Hux l e y 512a.

prize-giving! ) for three very good J o h n W i n f i e l d ( P h y s . 3)

Elk s Epistle (6) W e l l the end of term has

arr ived at last and everybody's

pack ing up and go ing home to see

M u m , leaving everybody in the

U n i o n Office free to carry out

their most obscure fantasies, apart

from me that is - 1 have no

fantasies; I carry out a l l mine in

real life immediate ly . W e l l when

you a l l get home be sure to give

my love to your M u m s and Dads

and k id brothers and think of me

on Easter Sunday eat ing creme

eggs underneath the dupl icator .

S o c i a l C o l o u r s

W e l l today's the last day for

handing- in your nominat ions for

social colours - so i f you've been

t h i n k i n g o f n o m i n a t i n g

somebody; you 'd better shift your

arse before 5:30 today.

I rasorasi .ce

I f you live in college-owned or

college-run residence then your

property is insured in your room

over the hol idays as it is d u r i n g

term. Y o u r stuff is also insured in

j transit between home and college.

P a r k i n g p e r m i t s

If you were issued wi th a

park ing permit at the beg inning

of the year and have since sold

your car or no longer use it for

c om ing into college, cou ld you

please let me know so it can be

reallocated to someone who needs

it.

E l e c t i o n s

T h e results of the elections at

the U G M on Thursday 15th

were:

Academic Affairs Officer - W y n

Jenk ins , Ex t e rna l Affairs Officer -

J o h n Passmore, U G M C h a i r m a n

- M i c k Berry, R a g C h a i r m a n -

R a c h e l Snee, Sexual Affairs

Off icer - M e l K i n k i e .

I th ink the fifth person in the list

w i l l do a par t i cu lar ly good job,

just the hermaphrod i te for the

job.

R e f e c t o r i e s

Don ' t forget, as things stand

we've got a constant boycott from

the beg inning of next term so feed

yourself up over Easter. A n y b o d y

who eats in Mooney ' s next term

wi l l have to face my chopper !

W e l l folks, see you a l l next

term; b r ing some wellies and some

sheep back for me!

M i k e E l k i n ( I C U S A O )

WELFARE ARTICLE Supplementary Benefit

In last week's article on

supplementary benefit there was

an e r r o r . T h e ra te f o r a

'Householder ' is £15.55 per week,

and not £12.45 per week. A

householder is someone who is

responsible for the outgoings

incurred in his accommodat i on

e.g. heating, l ighting o r te l ephone

bills. If you are a 'householder '

and c la iming for . rent over the

vacation, you cou ld get £15.55

p lusyour ren t less £13.90 vacation

element. Bear ing in mind that the

non-householder rate is £12.45

pe r w e e k , it w o u l d s e e m

worthwhile to press the D.H.S.S.

to accept you as a householder. It

is compl icated, however, by the

fact that there is no official

definition of a householder so it is

a quest ion of arguing it out. With

the D . H . S . S . o f f i c i a l w h o

interviews you.

Free Dental Treatment

If you are under 21, you can get

free dental treatment on the

N H S . anyway. If you are over 21,

then you wil l have to pay up to £5

for each course of treatment -

assuming that you don't require

anything more than fi l l ings and/or

extractions.

There is an except ion, however,

in the case of people on very low

incomes.

To get free treatment, your net

income after deduct ion of rent

and travel costs shou ld not be

much more than £18 per week.

Dur ing term times, very few

students would qualify for this,

but dur ing the short vacations,

your gross income is only the

vacat ion element - i.e. £13.90 per

week.

So, it might be worthwhi le to

see if you can get any necessary

dental treatment done dur ing the

vacat ion and then ask your dentist

for a declarat ion to s ign and then

you shouldn ' t have to pay. If

you're over 21, then, this cou ld

well save you a fiver.

M ichae l Arthur

IC Debating Society Imper ia l Col lege Deba t ing

Society wou ld like to thank the

fo l lowing for speaking in debates

so far this year: - (in approx imate

order ol appearance)

Barry Aus t in , D a v i d H a r r i s ,

T h w a i I e s / \ a r b o r o it g h a n d

Barton, Rache l Snee, Chr i s Fox,

L i z L indsay , Sean O 'Boy l e , M i c k

M a g h a r , T i m R a n d e l l , J o

Armi tage , Dave H a d d o n , Bob

Har t , Bob Halsey, Pete Bamford,

A n d y Lewis, Pete Hodd ino t t (and

f a m i l y ) M i k e W o r t , M a r y

A t t e n b o r o u g h , M i k e E l k i n ,

f a l co lm Bra in , Roger Stotes­

bury, Sonia Hochfe lder , Sheyne

Lucock , M i k e P i ckup , Chr i s

Russel l , C o l i n Pa lmer , J o h n

S h u t t l e w o r t h , M i c k B e r r y ,

Barney M c C a b e , M a r k S m i t h ,

D u n c a n Suss, Bernard S m i t h ,

Bob R i gby , R o y Burns, Sh lomo

Gods i , D r . D o n M o n r o , D r . Parr ,

D r . Ga rbu t t . H u g h Barrett ,

Barbara Smoker , D a v i d Ashforth,

E d w a r d B. J a m e s , H a r r y

Fa i rbrother .

Hope to hear from you again,

M i c k B e r r y P . P C o m m i t t e e .

P a g e 5

Day By Day A R O U N D - U P O F LAST W E E K ' S N E W S

Wednesday 14th Seven thousand mile journey to avoid school

Twelve-year o ld Vincent Kel ly d id not want

to go away to boarding schoo l , so he ignored

customs, immigrat ion and ticket checks and

flew 7,000 miles from Johannesburg to

London.

America's first women in space

Six women, dubbed "Chr i s ' s Ange ls " , (after

Chr is topher Kraft - the director o f the Lyndon

Johnson Space Centre) , wi l l be trained for

Amer ica 's space shuttle. The six were chosen

from 8,079 appl icants to train as "miss ion

spec ia l is ts " for Amer ica ' s next 'galactic '

a d v e n t u r e p l a c i n g , s e r v i c i n g , a n d

maintaining space satellites.

Albert Einstein

100 years ago saw the birth of Albert

Einstein.

To-day's scientists talk about Einste in

almost as if he was a god .... but despite his

wide knowledge he stil l sa id before he died

"He who can no longer pause and wonder, or

stand wrapt in awe, he is already half dead.

His eyes are shut."

Thursday 15th Volunteers needed in hospitals

It was announced by the Heal th and Soc ia l

Services Secretary, Mr. David Ennals , that

volunteers are to be asked to help out in

hospitals dur ing per iods of ser ious industr ial

act ion.

Sugarberg to feed bees

A mixture of white sugar, charcoa l and

powdered gar l ic is to be offered cut -pr ice to

Britain's bees. The sugar comes from the

C o m m o n Market department of surp luses

(also in charge of butter mountains and wine

lakes). It is 'dematured ' to make it repellent to

humans - "The garlic puts people off all

right", sa id the Intervention Board for

Agr icu l tura l P roduce , "But it also gives the

bees indigestion, so they add charcoal to sort

that out."

Friday 16th Ayatollah halts Iran executions

Pressure from the government and the

Prime Minister has forced the Ayato l lah

Khomein i to ban further pol i t ical execut ions.

The revolutionary courts wil l be suspended

until new regulat ions can be worked out.

Carrots can damage your health

Carrots have been found to conta in

carotatoxin, a potent nerve poison, not to

mention myrist ic in, a ha l luc inogen. It also

has isoflavones - they show strogenic effects,

which means that they imitate one of the

female sex hormones. On ions , olives, ham,

melons, potatoes, wine and many other

natural foods conta in s imi lar harmful

substances - the F o o d Manufacturers

Federat ion's national conference was told.

The manag ing director sa id of natural foods:

"We apply safety standards we dare not apply

to major ingredients, or we would have

virtually nothing to eat."

Concorde in "near-miss" incident

Controversy broke out today over the

safety of the skies around Kennedy Airport

after a Bri t ish A i rways pilot's complaint that

his supersonic C o n c o r d e airl iner was

involved in a "near -miss " with a private plane.

Commerc i a l air l ines have been growing

increasingly angry in recent months about

the rising number of private planes us ing the

air space near Kennedy Airport , one of the

busiest in the United States and the major

Amer i can gateway to Europe.

Saturday 17th Wales 27, England 3

Wales won their Rugby Un ion international

against Eng land by scor ing five tries. Wales

were leading by only 7-3 but in the last 21

minutes of the game they scored 20 points.

One of the oddest features of the match was

the poor standard of p lacek ick ing (3

successes in 18 attempts). The Welsh

captain, J P R Wil l iams, in his 52nd and final

international, was forced to miss the last

quarter of the game & had eight stitches put

in a wound in his calf.

France 21, Scotland 17

Scot land found themselves at the bottom of

the international table after an entertaining

performance against France. Just one point

above them is Eng land and then Ireland with

Wales beating France by I point to carry off

the championsh ip for the fourth t ime in five

years.

Nottingham Forest 3, Southampton 2

The League C u p final recaptured the

compet i t ion 's early days at Wembley. A Day

By Day reporter noted that the c rowd came

away talking about the variety of goals and

the strong indiv idual qualit ies that lay behind

the result. Gone was the v io lence that can be

seen so regularly at Saturday 's league

matches ....this was replaced by good-

humoured rivalry among the supporters who

carr ied giant red teddy bears, waved yellow

flags or s imply wore their team's colours.

Oxford win boat race

The 125th boat race between Oxford and

Cambr idge was the closest for a number of

years with Oxford winning by 3 and-a-half

lengths. Cambr idge suffered a severe

psycho log ica l shock before they put their

boat into the water. They had to change the

seating order of their crew and bring in a

substitute from their reserve crew, Gold ie , to

replace their unfit stroke. Oxford 's win was a

comfortable one achieved by leading all the

way on ca lm water.

Sunday 18th Golborne colliery explosion

Three men were ki l led and eight ser iously

burned in an underground exp los ion at

Golborr ie coll iery, near Wigan in Lancashire .

Nat ional C o a l Board investigations into the

cause of the explos ion, believed to be of

methane gas, wil l take several days.

Still more snow

Eight inches of snow fell in some parts of

northern Britain over the weekend and road

condi t ions particularly in the North-east

remained hazardous. Thousands of schoo l s

face c losure because of the chaot ic state of

the roads.

Monday 19th Young TV star dies

Richard Beckinsa le , the 31 year o ld actor,

who played Ronnie Barker 's ce l l -mate in the

c o m e d y s e r i e s P o r r i d g e , d i e d t oday .

Beck insa le appeared in a str ing of TV

successes. In Porr idge and its successor ,

Go ing Straight, he played Lenny Godber . In

Ris ing Damp, with Leonard Rossiter, he was

A lan the lodger.

R ichard is believed to have died of a heart

attack, a l though recent medica l checks

showed that he was in good health.

Monkeys trained to help the handicapped

Amer ican scientists are exper iment ing with

intelligent monkeys in an ambit ious attempt

to provide servants for paralysed inval ids. A

monkey cal led Crysta l has shown that

preparing sandwiches and putt ing LPs on

record players are not imposs ib le tasks. If

further training shows the same success then

monkeys might end up as the biggest vict ims

of all in man's exploi tat ion of animals.

Tuesday 20th Civil Service strike threatens Budget

The Government was warned that if it does

not produce realistic pay proposals by the

end of the week Civ i l Serv ice Un ions will

make it impossib le for any new measures in

Mr. Healey's Budget to be introduced. An

independent Pay Research Unit looking at

compar i sons has indicated that rises of 20

and 30 per cent are needed for some grades

of civil servants to bring them into line with

the private sector.

Unemployment falls

A welcome fall of 49.623 to a total of

1.402,254 people unemployed in the United

K i n g d o m has given the Government hope in

their fight against unemployment . The

improvement was borne out by seasonal ly

adjusted figures wh ich show the biggest

March drop for 20 vears.

Export licences for 'modern' paintings

Masterpieces by artists such as P icasso ,

Cezanne and Van G o g h will now need export

l icences if their owners wish to take or sell

them abroad, under changes to the export

system.

The announcement by the Department of

Educat ion and Sc i ence means that many

more major works of art are temporar i ly

s topped from export to give museums a

chance to purchase them. Before the new

rules were passed only works of art over 100

years o ld needed a l icence. Now all works of

art over 50 years old will need a l icence,

e m b r a c i n g s u c h a r t i s t s as the late

Impressionists and the early 20th-century

abstract artists.

Page 6

Mary Mutters- about Refectories Uppermost in most F E L I X readers ' m inds must be the

subject of the refectory boycott. Just in case you aren't

convinced enough that this action is necessary I thought I'd

better include an account of the Great Refectory Pr ic ing Saga.

T h e story really starts, from my point of view, back in December

1978, when it was recommended by the Refectory Commit tee there

should be a 2% price increase in the refectories. Pr ior to that us students

had been revol t ing (not hal f as much as the food), and compla in ing

about the high price for the qual i ty . U n i o n pol icy had been passed that

the U n i o n representatives on the Refectory Commit tee should accept

no price increases unt i l the qual i ty o f the food was improved. So, we

started to comp la in and a rather br i l l iant paper was presented to the

Rector about the proposed price increase. It was then that we realised

that there was something very much up wi th the regulator. A c co rd ing

to the minutes o f the Refectory Commit tee and Gove rn ing Body the

regulator was only supposed to cover food cost increases and yet, the

entirety o f the f i n a n c i a l T imes Grocery Index increase was added on to

our food prices every month . Th is seems strange considering that food

only constitutes approx imate ly 56% of cost to the Refectory account.

We used it as one part o f the argument against the proposed 2% termly

review increase to go on from the lst January , and on that occasion we

won and no extra increase was incurred that month .

It seems now that this was just one small move to fob off students from

compla in ing too much . Unfortunate ly , from the College point of view,

it d id not succeed. W e wanted a discussion on the use o f the regulator

and tried to push lor one at Refectory Commit tee . However , Professor

E i l o n . who doesn't l ike the idea of consumers hav ing any say in pr i c ing

in the refectories whatsoever, refused to a l low a discussion actual ly at

Refectory Commit tee and instigated instead a discussion at Refectory

F inance Sub-committee and then, presumably in an attempt to go over

the heads of'the Commit tee altogether referred it to the Rector, wh ich

led to the discussion at the F inance and Execut ive Committees o f the

College. A t F inance and Execut ive Committees we put our case

forward that the regulator was only ever meant to cover food cost

increases and it had , in fact, been misappl ied in the past. We argued

that the regulator could only be sensibly used to cover food cost

increases and further more we had to argue against a move, proposed to

that Commit tee , that a l l p r i c ing contro l should be taken out of the

hands of the Refectory Commit tee . Such a move would have been the

end of any possibil ity of democrat ic say for students. T h e proposals

coming out of that Commi t t ee were not too bad. They were that the

Refectory Commit tee should have a discussion upon the type of

regulator to be used, but that the regulator should cover food cost

increases and other regular increases to the Refectory account. This

would be in association wi th proper termlv reviews of refectory prices.

T h e understanding being that it was possible for refectory prices to go

down as wel l as up in such reviews.

Being naive, the student representatives on the Refectory Commit tee

expected that there wou ld be a full discussion on the use of the regulator

held at Refectory Commit tee . We should have realised there was

something up Professor E i l on ' s sleeve. H e al lowed us to support the

proposal to have two parts ofthe regulator. A two-tier regulator seemed

more sensible to us. as we 'd been told by F'inance and Execut ive

Committees that wages had to be taken into account, as one could have

one section to account for food price increases and another part to

account for wage increases wh ich could be based on current

expectations. A vote was taken at the Commit tee as to whether we

should have the o ld regulator based on the ful l increase ofthe F i n a n c i a l

T imes Grocery Index or whether we should have the new regulator

wh i ch would be 60% of the F inanc i a l T imes Grocery Index plus a

constant element to take account of wage cost increases. We voted for

the second natura l ly assuming that any clement to take account of wage

cost increases would only be a smal l one. That was when Professor E i l on

pul led the final rabbit out of his hat and said that it was not up to us to

decide what the wages element should be, that was just administrat ive

act ion. H e then announced, verbal ly only, a long argument on how he

proposed to justify a 1% prices increase per month on top o f the food

element increase to the refectory prices. W e were astounded and

amazed, real is ing that this could lead to something near a 10% increase

in prices by the end of this f inancia l year. E i l o n was obviously

overjoyed, bel ieving that he'd won the final battle to put down any

opposit ion to his views. The final insult came when he then proposed

that he wou ld not suggest any increase in the termly review that term.

Th is was not par t icu lar ly surpris ing, seeing as how he had just ensured

that the refectory account wou ld certainly end with a vast profit for this

session.

We d idn ' t panic immediate ly (much) because we believed that no

way cou ld the Rector possibly agree to this scheme. I went to see the

Rector and also qu ick ly prepared a paper wh i ch would take into

account an 8% expected wage rise dur ing the year (which is what the

Univers i ty Grants Commit tee had al lowed for as an estimate for this

year). I adjusted my paper because I realised that in i t ia l l y I had not

taken into account that there are two things that you need to cover in

terms of refectory income and refectory prices. The income is needed to

cover the overal l increased costs dur ing the year and the price is needed

to match up to the current costs ofthe meal at the end of any part icu lar

year. It is therefore very diff icult to take account of a discreet rise in cost

wh ich comes about on the date o f a wage settlement. I proposed that a

0. 2 . increase per month, w i th an adjustment o f a 1.3% increase at the

beg inning o f the financial year wou ld totally cover an 8% increase in

wages cost (assuming that wages in fact account for 43% of refectory

costs). As you can see from this ca lcu lat ion even a 16% wage increase

could be accounted by a 0.4% increase in refectory cost per month .

Despite this well-argued case that has been put forward. Col lege is

st icking to the idea that there is going to be a 20% increase in labour

costs, wh ich can only be accounted for by this 1% increase per month .

T h e 20% increase in labour costs is based on the total increase in labour

cost over last year's account, and does not take into account that there

has been a 16% increase in cash turnover in that period. T h e argument

being put forward is rather s imi lar to that of saying that if the amount of

chips bought by the refectory doubles then the cost of chips should be

doubled to take account of the increased ch ip cost to the refectory

account.

As if a l l this had not been enough not only was the new regulator

approved by the Rector but it has also been backdated to take account

of the J a n u a r y increase in the F inanc ia l T imes Grocery Index and to

add on 1% for each ofthe months of February and M a r c h . Th is means

that there was a 4% increase in refectory prices on M a r c h 15th.

Fo l l ow ing is an outl ine o f the increases we have met this year so far.

1. A 4% increase on the lst August , 1978.

2. A 1.9% increase on the lst December, 1978 (to take account o f the

total of the F inanc ia l T imes Grocery Index increase d u r i n g November ) .

3. A 1.4% increase on the lst Janua r y , 1979 (to take account ofthe total

F i n a n c i a l T imes Gorcery Index increase dur ing December) .

4. A 4% increase on the 15th M a r c h , 1979 (broken d o w n as follows - 60%

of the F inanc ia l T imes Grocery Index increase d u r i n g J a n u a r y equals

60% x 3.3 which equals 2% plus 1% wages element increase for that

month plus 60% of F inanc i a l T imes Grocery Index increase for

February , wh ich was only 0.1 % so they ignored it plus 1 % wages element

increase lor February .

I th ink everyone must agree that price increases have been excessive

this year and that we cannot accept increases that go on in this way. As

any other consumer group we have the right to voice a protest and this

we are do ing by boycott ing the refectories. T h e U n i o n Mee t i ng on the

15th M a r c h decided by an overwhe lming majority to carry on wi th an

all-out boycott ol the refectories from the beg inning of next term. Please

support the boycott.

The other decision made was to pu l l out ol " M e e t Imper ia l Col lege '

il the Execut ive so decided. Because the vo t ing on this was relatively

close, (something like 170 to 130 votes), I felt we should have another

discussion on this issue, before f inal ly tak ing the step, wh i ch we w i l l do

on Thursday , 26th Ap r i l , at a U n i o n meet ing to be held in the

Concert H a l l . Meanwh i l e , keep on boycott ing. Sec you next term.

M a r y Attenborough,

President

Imper ia l College Union

term.

The c lub officers lor this session

are: myself (Capta in ) , S imon

M i d d l e b o e , C i v . E n g . II

(Secretary), J u l i a Towns, Zoo II

(Ladies Capt . ) and G u y Buckley,

C h e m II (Treasurer).

If anyone has any points to raise

or questions to ask, please ask one

of the above. II anybody wishes to

join the Tenn is C l u b could they

please contact the treasurer or me

(via U n i o n Office).

Bar ry Witts (Maths III)

PS: I d idn ' t ment ion a certa in

book nor a certain operat ion.

Dear Sir , - I would like to point

out some information which I

think w i l l be of interest to F E L I X

readers.

The Pr ince 's Garden 's tennis

cour t s are s i t u a t e d b e h i n d

Linstead H a l l . These tennis

courts are for the use ol Imper ia l

Col lege L a w n Tenn is C l u b

members only. Member sh ip is

one pound, wh ich is good value

considering publ i c courts cost fifty

pence per hour to hire.

The nets and posts are i n

excellent condi t ion and the lines

w i l l be repainted soon. A booking

scheme wi l l be introduced next

Page 7

" E v e n Serpents Shine"

On ly Ones (CBS).

The

Cons ider ing that 1979 is

popular l y supposed to be " T h e

Yea r of the D i s c o " , and that this

a l bum is little more suited to

Disco play than is Dvorak 's New

W o r l d Symphony , it is hardly

surpr is ing that the music critics

love it.

Nevertheless, " E v e n Serpents

S h i n e " is a record very worthy of

being Imper ia l Col lege Rad io ' s

A l b u m of the Week this week. It is

not l ight entertainment, but

definitely needs to be sat down

and listened to. That ' s not to say

that it won't set your feet tapping,

fingers s t rumming , head nodding,

shoulders ro l l ing, or whatever

appreciat ive body movement

happens to be your own personal

perference.

The most obvious strength of

the a l bum is the d rumming ,

wh i ch comes from M i k e Ke l l i e

who played for Spooky Too th in

the late sixties and early seventies.

Th is carries you through every

track, keeping the beat, steady yet

wi th infinite variations, in perfect

t ime with the bass player A l a n

M a i r . Together they lay down an

intense and tight rhy thm, out of

which natura l ly grow the riffs

from J o h n Perry 's lead guitar,

wh ich ride alongside, and blend

into the basic r y thm, rather than

being awkward addit ions to the

tunc, slapped on to show off the

dexterity of the guitar player, as

so often seems to happen.

The greatest weakness of the

group must be Peter Perrett 's

voice, and a l though he admirab ly

succeeds in creat ing the most

gloomy and morb id of moods,

which matches the depressing

lyr ica l content of his songs

perfectly, (this is largely because

his voice sounds as though he has

recently swallowed a cheese-

grater) singing is not M r . Perrett 's

forte. The range of notes that he

appears to find easily attainable is

l imi ted to about three, a l though

when he does attempt to exceed

this range it tends to put your

teeth on edge. H a v i n g said that,

the effect of Mr .Per re t t ' s singing is

greatly enhanced when some

pleasing, though occasional,

harmonies are introduced.

II you ever heard the O n l y

Ones ' last single - " Y o u ' v e got to

pay" . - don't be put oil'; it must be

the weakest track on the a l b u m ,

and why it was ever chosen is a

mystery as there is one par t i cu lar

track - " O u t there in the n i g h t " -

which just screams out to be the

next single.

A l though "Se rpen t s " is by no

means a Classic it is we l l wor th

t ry ing to get hold of a copy and

p lay ing it through a couple ol

times.

Chr i s Watts

P.S. It grows on you.

"Travesties" by Tom Stoppard

Imperial College Dramatic Society

Tom Stoppard 's plays, with their

techniques of pastiche, controlled absurdity

and intricate double entendre are ideal

material for Dramsoc, and well suited to a

college audience. Ross Darling's production

of "Travesties" illustrates this perfectly. Its

small, well-rehearsed cast makes this one of

the best Dramsoc plays I have seen.

The play is a col lage of distorted scraps

from the memory of Henry Wilfred Carr.

Invalided out of war service in 1917 by a

gaping wound in his otherwise immaculate

attire, Car r had recuperated in Z u r i c h under

the auspices of the Brit ish Consulate .

Obsessed by sartorial trivia he now recounts

his meetings, real and imagined, with James

Joyce , Tristan Tzara and Lenin.

Th is framework presents a vehicle for one

of T om Stoppard 's favourite devices;

repeating sect ions of dialogue almost in

entirety, but with subtle differences. In

"Travest ies" the idea is taken further. These

are branching-points in the narrative,

particular lines wh ich act as common

beginni ngs for many totally different versions

of the same scene. It is soon impossib le to say

which versions are true (if any), and which are

projections of Carr 's own imagination or

desires. The story is unfolded using a wide

range of methods inc lud ing farce, striptease,

m o c k - S h a k e s p e a r i a n d r a m a , l i m e r i c k s ,

doggerel and even a "Mas t e rm ind " type quiz.

The whole product ion was rather stylish

without being over-elaborate. Mus i c was

from sources as diverse as Beethoven, Hoist

and The Temperence Seven. The slide

Projector wh ich caused such drastic bathos

in " M a c b e t h " , D r a m s o c ' s p r e v i o u s

product ion, was here used efficiently to

provide film-style opening credits. Cast,

l ighting and sound effects were all really wel l -

rehearsed, the occas iona l stumble in the

dialogue being the only slight cr i t ic ism. The

cavort ing dance towards the end was

absolutely hi larious and must have taken a lot

of practice.

Graham Brand as Henry Car r made a

basical ly good job of a hard role. It must be

daunting for a student to portray o ld age in

the absence of latex makeup, but apart from a

few distracting hand and eye movements and

nervous gestures. Graham's Henry Carr

passed from senility to youth with, at times,

startling effect. Bennett, the superc i l ious and

secretly radical butler was portrayed with

suitable emotionless, lofty indifference by

Mark Hope, Mark Wiszewaty gave a really

funny p e r f o r m a n c e as J a m e s J o y c e ,

e q u i p p e d wi th a c o n s i s t e n t but not

e x a g g e r a t e d I r i sh a c c e n t . T h e r i g i d

dialect ical approach of Lenin (Mike O' Brien)

was well contrasted with the extravagant

randomness of the Dadaist, Tzara (Mark

Rob inson - well acted). Isobel Beames as

Gwendo len acted with her usual sk i l l , and

Karen Webb as Cec i l y survived her ageing

process beautifully. Nadya (Victoria Scott)

narrated her sect ion clearly.

The audience (which enjoyed the show as

much as the cast seemed to) was adequate,

but s h o u l d have been m u c h larger ,

cons ider ing the quality of the product ion and

the low price of 75 p.

"77?e clever people try to impose a design

on the world and when it goes calamitously

wrong they call it fate. In point of fact,

everything is chance, including design

the causes we know everything about depend

on causes we know absolutely nothing about.

And it is the duty of the artist to jeer and howl

and belch at the delusion that infinite

generations of real effects can be inferred

from the gross expression ot apparent

cause".

- Tristan Tzara From "Travest ies" by Tom

Stoppard.

Paul Williams Physics II

Page 8

C O N S E R V A T I V E S O C I E T Y A . G . M .

What you are about to read is an extremely rare 'Societies Page'

article from the CONSERVATIVE SOCIETY.... and what better subject

to write one about than the Consoc. A.G.M..which was held on Tuesday

20th March. In addition to 14 Consoc. members was Gilly Gillespie, the

London Conservative Students Chairwoman/person/man who arrived

late thanks to the architect who designed the three-dimensional maze

called Huxley Building.

To kick off, the minutes and various committee members' reports

were disposed off with the exception of the Treasure's report which was

deferred to a later meeting - probably only to confirm that Consoc. is

flat broke. Well not every society can afford massive College-wide

wall poster campaigns and huge recruitment drives, especially when as

in our society, the claims by last year's Publicity Officer meant that part

of last year's expenses were added to this year's.

Next on the agenda was the extremely important e lect ions of next

year's committee and just when most people had the impress ion that for

the fourth A .G .M . in success ion all the posts would be unopposed it was

revealed that we have a contested "Morning C l o u d ' editorship post

between the absent Nick Grif f in and J o h n Narborough. By scrawl ing on

bits of computer paper kindly donated by Stephen Poley, our present

Cha i rman, the voters elected J o h n Narborough by a majority of 8 to 5 to

fill the post. The rest of the candidates were ratified, though the doctor

said it wasn't ser ious, and are as fol lows: -

Cha i rman Mark C legg

Vice Cha i rman Robert Gou ld

Secretary Sal ly Heslop

Treasurer T im Lawes

Sadly, nobody wanted to take the post of Publ ic i ty Officer, currently

held by me. There were rumours that Sh l omo Gods i was wanting to

stand but s ince neither d id he appear in person nor was his name on the

nominat ions paper the post was left vacant. So if you , Sh l omo , or

anyone else out there wants to stick up posters (B lu tac supplied) and

write the (very) odd article for FEL IX then just let our cha i rman know.

Two members. Sal ly Hes lop and Chr i s Webb made it known that they

wished to attend the Federat ion of Conservat ive Students annual

Conference in Liverpool and s ince nobody present minded them each

spending £20 of S C O money, they were ratified to be our delegates.

Our Cha i rman , Stephen Poley then wafted about a rather thick wad of

printed sheets (printed on both sides so they can't be used for rough

paper) wh i ch const i tuted the motions submitted to the F .C.S . Annua l

Conference . His suggest ion that the examinat ion of these motions, in

view of voting in the priorit ies ballot, be deferred to a meeting of the

delegates and any interested members of the executive was- gladly

accepted.

Unfortunately, the current Publ ic i ty Officer had to leave early in order

to attend a lecture on immunopatho logy , thus maintaining his (World?)

record of only miss ing thre (yes three) lectures in the three years hej ias

been at I.C.I O n that note wh ich is not entirely relevant to the article Twill

conc lude, thanks for reading it. Love and best wishes, Mart in S laddin

c

OFFICIAL NOTICE

Official notice to the members

of the Royal Co l l ege of Sc i ence

(especially those with lots of

money they don't want)

Tickets for the Royal Co l l ege of

Sc ience Annua l Ball to be held at

S i lwood Park on the 11th of May

1979 are to be put on sale to

members of the Royal Co l l ege of

Sc ience Un ion O N L Y on Friday

Apri l 27th. T ickets will be issued

from 12.30 pm on that date upon

product ion of a Val id Un ion card

and eighteen pounds. (Postdated

cheques not accepted). They will

be so ld from t h e R C S U Office only

(ie don't ask me for one in the bar

in the evening) and any not so ld in

that luncht ime period will be

offered for sale to any member of

Imperial Co l l ege from 12:30 on

the f o l l o w i n g M o n d a y , a n d

subsequent luncht imes until all

are so ld .

M. Maghar, Ents Cttee Chairman.

PLOUGHMAN'S LUNCH

Postgraduates! Boycott the

refectories on 2nd Apr i l . C o m e

and join other PGs for a good

meal at a very low price.

This year's second P l ough­

man's lunch wil l inc lude real ale,

bread, cheese, sausages, pickle,

etc. ail for the amaz ing price of 50

P-

The place is the Un ion Senior

C o m m o n Room .(1st floor, Union

Bui ld ing) ; the time is 12.30 pm on

Monday 2nd Apr i l . T ickets are on

sale now from J e n in the IC Un ion

Office. Hurry before they are all

sold out.

COMMUNITY ACTION GROUP

Jus t a little article this week as

there isn't a great deal to say at the

moment, Easter and all that.

The only bit of real information

is that S imon Chand le r has

dec ided to take on the job of Red

Cross volunteer co-ordinator.

This wil l be the job of organiz ing

hospital visit ing, trolly shops and

the like, as the col lege Red Cross

Detachment has mountains of

requests for such volunteers but

hasn't the organizat ion to fill them

at the moment. Therefore in future

this branch of communi ty act ion

will be looked after by them.

I wou ld also like to use this

space to gripe on how no-one

turned up on Sunday morning to

help paint the "prov idence Row"

place. I suppose with it being

Sunday morning with the c locks

just having come forward it was all

that cou ld be expected but at the

same time there was quite a

reasonable turn out from the

Catho l i c Chap la incy at More

House.

O h Wel l , see you all next term,

unless there's a soup run tonight.

Bye,

John Whitehouse Chem PG. int 4162.

T h e A n n u a l I n t e r - C C U S m a l l

Bore R i l l e Compe t i t i on Fo r The

C o u r t m a n Shie ld was recently

held at the Ri f le Range in T h e

Sports Centre . T h e R . C . S . team

were f i rm favourites to w in and it

was clear that they had done so

before their last m a n shot. The

battle lor second place was rather

closer w i th C and G manag ing to

beat R . S . M . into th i rd place.

ili^aY, Sauai

pari i _

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Page 9

Not a lot has happened s ince

my las t a r t i c l e h e n c e the

shortness of this one.

C o n g r a t u l a t i o n s to G u i l d s

Hockey Team for winning the

Stephenson's C u p match against

r.c.s. the score was 1-0.

However, despite my predict ion

and the support of about 15

intrepid (insane?) Gu i l d smen who

braved the rain and freezing wind

to encourage the Gu i l ds Rugby

Team in the Sparkes C u p against

mines, we lost. The Gu i lds team

made a brave attempt against a

strong mines team and were

leading at half time. Mines took

advantage of the wind and their

greater weight in the second half

to win the match 17-10. This

means that mines win the Sparkes

cup unless r.c.s. performed a

miracle on Wednesday.

The only coming event of

interest in the near future is the

Four Year Course Recept ion, this

is at 7.00 p.m. next Tuesday in the

S.C.R. Sherf ield and consists of a

sl ide show of Gu i lds events and a

chat with the 4 Year Course

students, most of whom are in

industry at the moment.

Hunk

RCS WIN AGAIN

The Ri f le Compe t i t i on was

followed by the Pistol M a t c h for

the H u n g t i n d o n C u p . The

outcome of this event was m u c h

less predictable due to the

inconsistent standards of many of

the pistol shooters w i th in the

clubs. O n c e aga in the winners

were R . C . S . w i th an under-

strength C and G team coming

second.

JOIN NOW

You may have read about the

FELIX const i tut ion that was

recently accepted by publ icat ions

board. Just in case you thought

FELIX was only a newspaper that

appeared at various places on a

Friday morning, I'll outl ine what

FELIX as a society has to offer:

(1) Excel lent opportunit ies to

l earn s o m e t h i n g of how a

newspaper is produced and in

particular how FELIX itself is

planned, typed, pasted up etc.

right through to distr ibut ion.

(2) Use of the magnif icent

facilities that exist in the FELIX

Office(s). Adv ice will usual ly be

on hand if needed.

(3) Your big chance to work on

FELIX, meet the boss and find out

what he spends his sabbat ica l

on.

(4) Fun; 'cos we promise there

will be the odd soc ia l event.

WHY NOW?

Please, don't say "I'll wait 'til

next year". We need you so badly

that we're going to s lash our

prices so you' l l only be asked to

fork out 30 p instead of 50 p for

nextyears membership, if you join

now.

DO IT NOW!

Walk boldly through those

infamous guil lot ine swing doors.

Focus on the someone who is in

the office (He's the Editor) tell him

you wish to join FELIX, (and also

how to spell you name) and make

a quick exit in case he doesn't

forget to ask for your money.

John Shuttleworth

I .C. C H E S S C L U B IC I v ISL INGTON III

After a fine 7-1 victory over Wood Green, the first team travelled up to

Islington, confident of maintaining its challenge for promotion to the

premier division next year. On arriving, we discovered that the

opposition was much weaker than anticipated and so looked forward to

another convincing win.

The match started well with Chris Callow obtaining a big advantage

out of the opening on board 6 and Bob Coles, on the board above,

picking up an extra.pawn by neat tactical play. The opposing captains

quickly drew a very boring game on board 1 and when Dave Lock

refuted an unsound sacrifice the match looked over.

However Islington fought back. O n board 4, Shah in Rouhan i tried too

hard to force a win and blundered away a piece and the game. J o h n

Freeman fell into a prepared bookl ine, sacr i f iced unsound ly and, in

time-trouble, lost his queen. At this point, Islington seemed to have

chances of saving the match as, on board 3, Pete Anderson was

struggl ing to maintain an equal posit ion and on the bottom board,

Damian Hassan, a l though a pawn up, cou ld not break through his

opponent 's defenses.

Fortunately, Pete managed to draw and Bob duly won a fine game

leaving the match tied at 3-3. As both Chr i s and Damian have won

posit ions, IC look certain to score another victory a l though not in as

conv inc ing style as expected.

IC I v C E N T Y M C A D R A G O N S

Despite a d isappoint ing performance against Islington, the same

team was selected to play against the div is ion 1 leaders. Cen t ymca

Dragons. This was a cruc ia l promot ion match with IC needing a win to

have any chance of promot ion this season.

A l though an IC victory seemed unlikely, our chances were enhanced

when the oppos i t ion arrived with only 7 players, default ing on board 7.

Prospects looked even brighter when Bob Co l es obtained a posit ional ly

won game and Pete Anderson held onto two extra pawns, sacr i f iced by

his opponent, without obtaining an inferior posi t ion. On board 6, Chr i s

Ca l l ow was forced to accept a draw by perpetual check and Dave Lock,

promoted to board 4, drew quickly , miss ing a s imple win on the way.

J o h n Freeman recovered his early season good form and smashed up

the London U-10(!) champion , N. Carr, on board 2, accept ing all his

opponent 's sacri f ices on the King-s ide and then destroy ing him on the

Queenside. (Carr was handicapped by his size, being unable to reach

past the fourth rank). On the top board, Phi l Maguire lost a pawn to a

strong opponent and, a l though managing to survive a wi ld t ime-

scramble, was never able to overcome this material deficit.

Meanwhi le Pete Anderson had converted his advantage to a win but

Bob Co l es had erred and was f ighting for a draw. Damian Hassan , on the

bottom board, was also struggl ing in a difficult posi t ion and by the

adjournment the match was poised 4-2 in IC s favour, with Bob and

Damian still to f inish. A draw from either game wou ld secure victory for

IC and leave the team with a good chance of promot ion to the Premier

Div is ion.

P. Maguire

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Page 10

R E V I E W S I

Anyone w h o

review f i lms,

r eco rds etc.

Mark S m i t h •

le t terracks or the F E L I X Off ice.

w o u l d l ike to

p lays , books ,

p lease con tac t

v ia P h y s i c s 2

FILMS California Suite (AA, Herb Ross)

The Royal Film Performance

1979.

Having seen this film at 10.30 on

a Monday morning my recol lec­

tions may not be too accurate.

Well, I d id beat the Queen to it

anyway. This is the latest in a

string of films based on the plays

of Amer i can writer Neil S imon.

The star-studded cast inc ludes

such greats as Michae l Caine,

A lan (M.A.S.H.) A lda , Bi l l Cosby ,

Walter Matthau, Jane Fonda and

more.

The setting is the world famous

Beverly Hi l ls Hotel , cocktai ls , sun,

palm trees and al l . Five separate

couples converge on the hotel for

various reasons and through the

observation of their separate

stories an orig inal , amus ing plot is

obtained. The various progress­

ions in personal re lat ionships are

heavily exploi ted to create some

hi larious moments. In an effort to

avoid giving away too much of the

story, I can only list the various

couples .

Diane Barry is an actress who

has been nominated for an Oscar

award and arrives from Eng land

with her husband Sidney. Hannah

and Bi l l Warren are d ivorced and

are both seek ing custody of their

daughter. B i l l C o s b y and R ichard

Invasion of The Body Snatchers

(X, Philip Kaufman)

This remake of Don Siegel 's

1956 c lass ic is bound to arouse a

lot of interest over Easter, but is it

worth it? A l l of this and more will

be revealed below

M a t t h e w B e n n e l l ( D o n a l d

Sutherland) is a publ ic health

inspector who is in love with his

a s s i s t a n t E l i z a b e t h D r i s c o l l

(Brooke Adams ) . She, however, is

living with Geoffrey who has been

act ing very strangely lately. It

sounds a bit like " C r o s s r o a d s " but

this is the re lat ionship wh i ch leads

Matthew and El izabeth to believe

that al ien beings have invaded

Earth and are taking over human

bodies. Their fight for survival is

aided by friends, inc lud ing Dr.

David K ibner (Leonard Nimoy) ,

and opposed by masses of

emot ionless aliens.

After a poor start the film

accelerates to an exc i t ing pace.

The al iens seem unbeatable and

are g i v e n a q u i t e u n u s u a l

treatment. The people taken over

Pryor play two doctors who are

intense rivals. Marvin Michae ls is

the inevitable innocent party,

whose wife arrives to find a

woman in his room.

With all of these couples , love

and marriage are the common

factors. The way in wh ich these

are dealt with is very funny, but

there are some very ser ious and

moving scenes. This is especial ly

true for Diane Barry (Maggie

Smith) and Sidney (Michael

Caine) . Fine performances from

both actors are a pleasure to

watch. Neil S imon is extremely

clever in that there is no limit on

the types of comedy he can

introduce by keeping the film as

four separate stories. There is

slapstick as well as some very

clever (dare I say) intellectual

humour.

This film has something for

everybody and shou ld not be

missed if you like "s i tuat ion-

c o m e d y " t y p e t e l e v i s i o n

programmes.

That is not to say that it is like a

cheap midweek television show.

On the contrary, the money and

acting talent has been used

carefully to produce a pol ished

and very enjoyable comedy.

Mark Smith

are not portrayed as " zombies "

but as a different kind of man,

perhaps super ior due to a lack of

e m o t i o n . O u r h e r o c a n n o t

appreciate this and is determined

R E C O R D F R A N K Z A P P A -

S H E I K Y E R B O U T I

"Hey! Do you know what you are?

You're an asshole! AX ASSHOLE!"

Yes, D i r t y U n c l e Frank ie is

back! Sheik Ye rbout i , a double

semi-live a l b u m , and his first since

signing wi th C B S from Discreet

Records, is certainly what Z a p p a

fans have been wa i t ing for.

Showing much of his old

i m a g i n a t i o n , a n d q u i r k l y

shrugging off the "S leep D i r t "

disaster, /ierdo takes the stage

again.

T h e a lbum's first track, " I have

been in y o u " , promises much wi th

its interesting lyrics, interplay

between lead and backing vocals

and l ine sound qual i ty . Th is

catches the ear and it is at this

point that one realises that the

vocals are not the or ig inal

recording, but an overdub onto

the l ive back ing track, wh i ch was

taken from a recent H a m m e r ­

smith Odeon performance, as was

a majority of the a lbum's

mater ia l . Th is eoupled wi th the

interesting feature of ed i t ing each

track into the next, rare for a

studio or live a l b u m , maintains

the flow of sounds. " B r o k e n

Hearts for Assholes" is typ ica l

Zappa ; a sort of cross between

insanity and Jazz - rock , wh i ch he

combines wi th his penchant for

audience abuse.

N o t h i n g on side two. on which ,

incidently, we have moved to the

new Y o r k P a d d l a d i u m , is worth a

ment ion, i nc lud ing two half-

minute tracks, unt i l the superb

" B o b b y B r o w n " - a sort of " l ook

at me, I 'm proud to be A m e r i c a n "

take off, about a guy who loses his

bearings; Z a p p a in fine form. The

last two tracks are from Ber l in .

and frankly they sound like

Focus on a bad day, wh i ch is true

of m u c h of the patchy mater ia l on

this a l bum.

Side Three is the highl ight and

possibly wor th the asking price on

it's own. The short " B a b y

S n a k e s " goes s t r a i g h t in to

" T r y i n ' to G r o w a C h i n " , a song

wi th a persecution complex if ever

there was one; " W h y am I l i v in '? I

wish I was dead. Please k i l l me . "

Get the picture? We 've heard it

al l before but what the heck.

A bit of applause, the first on

this " l i v e " a l b u m , and we're into

" C i t y of T i n y L i g h t s " , featuring

guitarist. A d r i a n Belew on vocals.

Possibly the strength of this

sequence is the interchanging

between vocalists, also inc lud ing

d rummer . Te r ry Bozzier. Back to

Z a p p a now on " D a n c i n ' F o o l " ,

soon out as a single. Th is takes the

whole disco scene and rips it up

piece by piece. The suave p ick-up

artist also suffers; "Hey Darlin'

...Can 1 buy you a drink?

II ail a minute I've got il... You're

Italian! Hah?

Yer Jewish? Love your nails ....You

must be a Libra."

If you don't buy the a l b u m , at

least treat yourself to this

excellent single.

The final track on side three,

"Jew ish Pr incess" , is peppered

with sexual innuendo and as such

should pick up bans a l l over the

place, a l though I 'm sure I C

R a d i o w i l l be p l ay ing it.

Side F o u r is terrible - Forget it.

Unless of course you're a Z a p p a

freak in wh i ch case it's probab ly

right up your street.

W e l l that's your lot; I ' l l be back

after the Easter Break tak ing a

look at some of the records that

come out in the meant ime.

Jon F i r th

to rid the wor ld of the invaders.

The confl ict which follows is very

interesting and, thanks to some

excellent camera work and a fine

sound track, the film succeeds in

mm

Matthew Bennell (Donald Sutherland) captured by aliens

making you feel that you too are

threatened.

The film has several drawbacks

however. It is not one of those

r e a l l y m e m o r a b l e m o v i e s ,

p r o b a b l y b e c a u s e o f t h e

outrageous story. Far too many

"red herr ings" are thrown in wh i ch

may intrigue a few but confuse

most. The most r id iculous thing in

my mind was the inc lus ion of

" A m a z i n g G r a c e " i n t h e

soundtrack at an inappropriate

point. Why this happened I just

don't know.

To summar ise I wou ld say that

even though parts of the film are

spur ious and dul l , it is generally

very entertaining and shocks in

the desired way. Remakes are

very difficult and this must rank as

one of the best, if only for the

appearance of Don Siegel and

Kevin McCar thy (a star in the

original) as extras. Even if you've

seen the original you cou ld really

enjoy it. The large publ ic i ty

campa ign may also mean you

can't avoid it!

Mark Smith

Page 11

" T A B L E TENNIS

If there is anyone still out there on planet

I.C. reading this FELIX, then this report was

worth writing (if not worth reading!).

In chrono log ica l order of matches played:

I.C. IV v AMALG. DENTAL (Home) 9-0

A well-dri l led fourth team played like a gas

with Lambert and Cobr in winning all three

sets for the first t ime ever Rutherford of

course did his usual bit.

I.C. Ill v. BARBICAN Computer Centre II

(Away) 4-5

The match was finally resolved in the 8th-

set, when I l o s t21 -18 in the3rd game and thus

left the score 4-4. As the final match was

against B A R B I C A N ' s top player, the eventual

4-5 defeat was a formality, though Reed made

a gallant effort. He won one of his three sets,

Stean won two, and me one.

I.C. II v. E A G L E III (Home) 7-2

M u c h d iscuss ion took place on the subject

of Sobhanpanah 's and Ugoala 's serves. It was

resolved (partly) when I commented that one

of the Eagle players had an equally " i l l ega l "

serve. I.C. eventually won a tense match

thanks to Farzin (3 sets), Tye (2 sets) and Eze

(2 sets).

I.C. IV v. D of E IV (Home) 6-3

Weng Leong (with my bat!!) pul led off three

great wins and with Lambert (2 wins) and

Cobr in (1 win) ensured victory.

Well, as this is an end-of-term report here

are the results of a Universal (one person)

Pol l on my efforts: Sppe l ing : 98%, Gramma:

N o u t , W i t : L e s s , S a d o - m a s o c h i s t i c

tendencies: 3 and a half. Next term, cr icket

reports from Super Smooth?

I C R O S S C O U N T R Y

F o r the second t ime this t e r m the

presence of IC runners in C a m b r i d g e

has brought b l izzards, on this occasion

for the Boundary R u n , an annual 26 mi le

trot around the city, to be completed

within 6 hours.

T h e 153 starters struggled in d r i v ing snow

over a first five miles of ploughed fields before

h i t t ing roads for the next fifteen miles, a l l but

the leading pack of four tak ing advantage of

M a r s bars supplied at 14 and 19 miles out.

T h e last 6 miles of a marathon are bad

enough without inc lud ing a league of muddy

fields, w i th fences, ditches and rai lway lines

to traverse. Nav iga t i ona l error took its tol l ,

rout ing arrows hav ing been stolen: our own

M a r k P i ckard was misdirected onto a short

cut, tak ing h i m to the finish in first place,

honesty and a four minute penalty reduc ing

h i m to 3rd in 2 hrs 48 mins 20 sees. First place

was taken by Cambr idge ' s Chr i s H i rs t in

2.44.20, w i th M . E l l i son one minute beh ind.

T h e two-man Imper ia l team was completed

after 3.10.06 when Geoff Sherwood,

disguised as an icicle, staggered into the finish

in 7th place, causing the snow to stop in so

doing.

With the competit ive season drawing

to a close, this is the t ime of year when

clubs settle internal r ivalr ies and give

one another trophies, I.C. are no

exception. Las t Wednesday saw the

annual c lub 5000m race, held at a

w i n d s w e p t a n d r a i n - l a s h e d W e s t

London Stad ium. F o r several weeks

past Ian M o r t o n had been m a k i n g dai ly

t r ips to the Un i on Off ice in order to eye

up the rather impressive piece of Silver

which the winner holds for one year,

such was his desperate desire to win ,

and so break the dominat ion of recent

years by the Phys ics Dept.

H e even took his war of nerves to the length

o f a late a r r i va l in order to shatter the spirits

of his rivals. W h e n the race got underway it

was the fast start ing M a r k Thwaites and

D a n n y C larke-Lowes who set off at a

bl ister ing pace. Soon Stu L i t t l ewood and

M a r k P i cka rd took the lead wi th Bryan

Ac ford and M o r t o n close behind. A t the

2000m mark Ac ford made his move, (with a

notable lack of success) he held the lead for 3

laps unt i l M o r t o n skated through, and

proceeded to storm onward over the final

1500 m and eventual ly sl ipped and slithered

his way to a fine (if lucky) v ictory in a

respectable 16 mins 15 sec. H e was followed

in by L i t t l ewood and P i cka rd in the " s i l v e r "

and " b r o n z e " medal positions. L i t t l e Ian's

delight was somewhat tarnished, however,

when he discovered that he wou ld be

required to fill the cup to its ful l 6 pint

capacity.

Saturday gave us the annua l race against

the O l d Boys and by 3:30 p m there were a

mere 14 indiv iduals at the start. The thought

of splashing a round R i c h m o n d Park

evidently being considerably less attract ive

than sitt ing in front o f the T V watch ing the

Boat Race and the R u g b y and down ing a

quiet gal lon. As was eventual ly inevitable,

hangovers caught upon Ian M o r t o n and he

d idn ' t arr ive at a l l . Th is only served to lift

Acford 's spirits to a previously u n k n o w n high

as he scented a maiden victory. R i c h

Har r ing ton was obviously of the same

op in ion as he tried to persuade each

competitor, in turn , to give a bit extra and try

to " W o b b l e " Ac fo rd . But the " C a r t h o r s e "

was not to be denied and he steamed off in

fine style wi thout even pausing to glance

behind. Some even c la imed to have seen

smoke issuing from his ears as he carreered ofl

into the distance. Ac fo rd was a conv inc ing

v ictor w i th Ian Isherwod w inn ing the tustle

for 2nd place from the ageing Chr i s James.

Four th home was the aforementioned

Har r ing ton enjoying a glorious swansong.

The remain ing finishers being, in order, G a r y

Longhurst , A l f Garnet t , Ian A lvey , Dave

Cleator , M a u r i c e W i l son , Dave Briggs, Pete

Johnson , M a r t i n Ta rnowsk i , Dave Jones and

finally M i r i a m Rosen. The result was rigged

in order to achieve the t rad i t iona l draw.

Th is almost marks the end of the season,

but for those of you who enjoy shorter

d i s t a n c e s , the I n t e r - C C U A t h l e t i c s

C h a m p i o n s h i p s a r e b e i n g h e l d o n

Wednesday A p r i l 25th at the West L o n d o n

S tad ium. Do come a long and support your

C C U , as the standard is pretty low, and a

good time is had by a l l , you may even see

M a r k Co r r i gan in steeplechase act ion !

L 'Escargot (again)

REVIEWS! Friday 16th March

Hoist: Hymn of Jesus

Rossini: Petite Messe Solennelle

If the last week at IC is any indication, then the music of Gustav Hoist

is enjoying a vigorous revival, if indeed it has ever been neglected. Last

week DramSoc chose for incidental music the best known of Hoist's

music, "The Planets", and on Wednesday the Wind Ensemble

programme featured more of the music written by this composer.

O n Friday the IC Cho i r , under the direct ion of Professor Eric Brown,

performed Hoist 's " H y m n of Jesus " , a piece written only two years after

"The Planets" at the end of the Great War. Despite its origin in such

turbulent years, the Hymn is ca lm, reflective and full of sustained voices

reminiscent of "Neptune, the myst ic" . Its text is a setting of early

Chr is t ian writings, from the "Apocrypha l Ac ts of St. J o h n " , and was

translated by the composer himself. The piece is dedicated to Ralph

Vaughan Wil l iams, who had also studied under Stanford at the R C M .

The Hymn opens with an unaccompan ied p la insong melody from a

trombone (a solo in this performance rather than the stipulated pair in

unison). The prominence o f the trombone is no doubt attributable to the

composer being himself a player of that instrument. O n this occas ion

the orchestra was extremely competent, a l though the strings had some

difficulty with the asymmetr ical rhythms at the beginning of "Div ine

Grace is danc ing . "

At times the p la insong themes and the use of a smal l male semi -

chorus evoked a rather monast ic atmosphere, but for the most part the

music was luxuriant rather than ascetic, with long high descants (in the

original sense, of a melody sung above the plainsong) and bell- l ike

chords from the orchestra. A s in many other pieces by this composer ,

the bass line is predominantly a heavy, treading sca l ic descent, a sort of

anchor which prevents the chorus from drifting away from the Earth

completely.

The harmonies employed by Hoist are chromatic , often unusual and

very effective. Great beauty is achieved by a careful use of d i ssonance

rather than from sacchar ine consonances . A n example is the "G l o ry to

thee, Father", where the last word is accented and enhanced by first a

major chord, and then by one of the most harmonical ly remote chords

possible (for those of a technica l disposit ion, the minor triad a tritone

distant) as the lower strings plunge into their descending scales.

The Ross in i piece is an interesting cho ice for the Choir , s ince it has a

strong emphasis towards the soloists, with few opportunit ies for the

chorus to come into the foreground. Perhaps this enabled the C h o i r to

save their energies, s ince the choruses were very brilliant. Th is Writer

was particularly impressed by the " C u m Sancto Sp i r i tu " of the " G l o r i a " ,

for which one could not imagine a finer performance. The soloists were

highly competent, and Jeffrey Cresswel l 's s ing ing of the " D o m i n e

Deus " was particularly enjoyable.

The "Petite Messe So lennel le " is a piece which I had heard only once

previously, and I suspect that it was less familiar to most ofthe audience

than Ross ini 's earlier "Stabat Mater". A l though Ross in i is best known

today as a composer of opera, he also turned out quite a few sacred

pieces. The "Petite Messe " is not part icularly short, nor is it not iceably

more so lemn than any of these other pieces. Indeed, the earlier sect ions

abound with cheerful little tunes, many of wh i ch are thrown away quite

casual ly, wh ich would not have been out of place in any Ross in i opera,

and the Mass only becomes so lemn towards what would presumably, in

l iturgical performance, be the actual Celebrat ion. The C h o i r seemed to

be more confident in the convent ional harmonies and melodies of

Ross in i , and they achieved some beautiful tone with accurate s ing ing,

right up to the long and intricate final Amen .

Derrick Everett

Page 12

NEWS IN BRIEF J E W I S H S T U D E N T

A R R E S T E D

Boris Ka l endarev , the Soviet

Jewish student adopted by I C

U n i o n last year, has been arrested

by Soviet police. It is expected

that he w i l l be charged w i th

evasion of conscr ipt ion, wh i ch

could lead to a sentence of three

years in a labour camp.

T h e U n i o n has responded w i th

protest telegrams to President

Brezhnev and U S S R State

Prosecutor Rudenko . U n i o n

President M a r y A t t enborough

has also wri t ten to Fore ign

Secretary D a v i d O w e n and Peter

Brooke, M P for Westminster,

asking them to urgently take up

Boris's case.

She has also sent a letter to

R u d e n k o strongly urg ing h im to

release Ka l enda r e v and saying

that his arrest is "in flagrant

defiance of the Helsinki agreement and

breaches every acceptable standard of

human rights.

21 year o ld Boris has been

t ry ing to emigrate from the Soviet

U n i o n . H e app l i ed for an exit visa

in 1973 three years before he was

el igible for mi l i ta ry service. In

1977 he was expelled from

Col lege for app l y ing to emigrate i

and since then the Soviet

authorit ies have tried to force h i m

into the army.

I C U n i o n a long wi th other

student unions adopted Boris as

part of a nat iona l campa ign in

support of the right of Soviet Jews

to emigrate to Israel. Students are

urged to assist Boris by wr i t ing to

D r . O w e n and to their local M P s ,

urg ing them to take up his case. A

list of M P s is avai lable at I C

U n i o n Office.

Western protests have in the

past resulted in the release o f

Soviet Jews. Boris 's fate now

depends on sufficient pressure

be ing exerted on his behalf.

A P H E L P N E E D E D

A c a d e m i c A f f a i r s O f f i c e r

Roger Stotesbury has organised a

" p a s t e - i n " this weekend to paste­

up the A l te rnat i ve Prospectus

ready for pr in t ing . T h e session

w i l l start tonight and cont inue

unt i l the work is finished. A n y

volunteers w i l l be welcome. N o

previous experience is required.

V A N D A L S A G A I N

T w o coin-operated telephones

have been instal led in the

entrance foyer of the U n i o n

Bu i ld ing . They have been placed

on the wa l l instead of in cubicles

in an attempt to make them less

prone to vanda l i sm. Th i s has been

-to no ava i l - one of them has

already been vandal ised.

T O P O F R A G

Zosia Zbrzezn iak , R C S Queen

ol 'Jez is the country 's number one

rag col lector. She has ind i v idua l l y

col lected more for rag this session

than any other student.

B O T T L E B A C K

T h e M i n e s Bottle is back in the

U n i o n Bar fo l lowing its rescue

from Chelsea Col lege on M o n d a y

night.

But it stil l bears the marks of its

adventure as the words "Che l s ea

Co l l e ge " wi th dates have been

engraved on the bottle.

It was K e n Newton of the

Sports Centre who discovered its

whereabouts. H e was d r i n k i n g at

Chelsea's Bar and overheard

Chelsea students boasting about

all the mascots they had collected.

O n M o n d a y evening he

returned accompanied by M i ne r s

and asked for the bottle. It was

handed over without fuss.

T O P I C W R O N G

I C U n i o n Execut ive are

annoyed about an art ic le wh i ch

appeared in last week's T O P I C

s u g g e s t i n g t h a t R e f e c t o r y

Commi t t ee proposed the one per

cent month ly wages element in

the new regulator.

U n i o n P r e s i d e n t M a r y

A t tenborough has pointed out

that the scheme was proposed by

Refectory Commi t t ee C h a i r m a n

Professor E i l o n and not discussed

by the committee.

M O R E H E L P F O R IRANIANS

T h e Depar tment of H e a l t h and

Socia l Securi ty has extended the

period d u r i n g wh i ch they w i l l

give financial assistance to

I ran ian students. I C has frozen

their fees. T h e H o m e Office has

granted them visas and they w i l l

probably be given work permits

so that they can earn money

d u r i n g the vacations.

P H O N I C E A R

Eleven year old Jerome C a n v i n

and six of his friends from the

H o n n i t o n P r imary School Dea f

U n i t attended a special party in

college last Sunday. The event

was organised by R C S U in order

to present Jerome wi th a special

" P h o n i c E a r . "

T h e a id was purchased w i th

£'800 raised by a special R C S rag

col lect ion - over a one-quarter of

which was raised by Zosia

Zbrzezn iak alone. Zos ia made the

presentation personally.

A teacher from the unit

d ' e m o n s t r a t e d t h e u n i q u e

qualit ies of the a id , wh i ch al lows

c ommun i ca t i on wi th the ch i l d r en

at up lo ha l f a mi le , v ia a radio

system.

Jerome 's fami ly joined in the

celebrat ion and expressed their

sincere grat i tude to a l l of those

who had helped in any way. Par ty

games were followed by a

mounta in of food. After the

ch i ldren had left, the exhausted

students only just mustered the

strength to down a barrel of beer,

one of their wel l -earned rewards.

T h e event was covered by the

nat iona l press.

contd. from front page

and Un ion President Mary At tenborough wil l be student representative

on Col lege 's Overseas Students ' Commit tee .

C o u n c i l passed a vote of thanks to Sheyne Lucock for all the work he

has done for the Un ion .

Publ ic i ty

The Meet ing made several smal l changes to Un ion publ ic i ty rules.

C lubs and Societ ies will no longer need to ask permiss ion to put up

posters but individuals wil l sti l l be required to do so. On ly the Un ion

Publ ic i ty Officer wil l be able to grant permiss ion. No dayglo posters of

any co lour wil l be permitted. A l l e lect ion posters will have to show the

date of the relevant e lect ion.

Recogn is ing that the Const i tuent Co l l ege Un ions regularly use A1

(48" x 32") size posters, previously i l legal under Un ion rules, C o u n c i l

amended the rules to al low posters up to A1 size.

In a d i scuss ion on publ ic i ty for Un ion Meet ings and the distr ibut ion of

"Execut ive News" it was suggested that it cou ld be distr ibuted as a

supplement to FELIX as well as separately before and dur ing a U G M .

This w'.i be tried to see if it is feasible.

Fo l l ow ing cr i t ic ism of Mary At tenborough 's active support for Sheyne

Lucock ' s presidential campaign , a suggest ion was made that sabbat ica l

Un ion officers should not be al lowed to campa ign on behalf of any

elect ion candidate. However C o u n c i l dec ided not to d i scuss this.

W U S Co l l ec t i on

C o u n c i l agreed to support the new Wor ld University Serv ice

scho larsh ip to enable a " th ird wo r l d " student to take a one year

advanced course at IC. The W U S c o l l e c t i o n to be taken at the beg inning

of the sess ion dur ing registration will now be devoted speci f ical ly to that

purpose.

S O C I A L L I F E

F O R H A R L I N G T O N

A meet ing of the Athlet ics

Grounds Commit tee discussed

means of enab l ing students to

meet socially at H a r l i n g t o n after

matches. A subcommittee of the

Athlet ics C l u b s Commi t t ee is to

discuss several possibilities of

ar rang ing late coaches back to

Col lege or a shuttle service to

Ha t t on Cross tube station, to

a l l o w s tuden ts to stay at

H a r l i n g t o n af ter the m a i n

coaches leave at 6.00 p.m.

O V E R S E A S S T U D E N T S

Q U O T A

T h e U n i v e r s i t y G r a n t s

Commit tee has told Col lege that

it must reduce the number of its

overseas students by 7 per cent in

1981-82.

IC 's Gove rn ing Body rejected a

proposal by L o r d A n n a n , V i c e

Chance l l o r of L o n d o n Univers i ty ,

that Colleges should get round the

quota by charg ing the full

economic cost on some courses.

Gove rn ing Body agreed wi th

M a r y A t t enborough that the

concept of full economic cost was

unrealistic. She pointed out that

the imposi t ion of quotas was

abhorrent to academic freedom.

Government pol icy on overseas

students was not proper ly thought

out and they had ignored the

benefits to this country of

educat ing overseas students.

She told Gove rn ing Body that

Col lege should not be complacent

about quotas th ink ing that

overseas student numbers wou ld

fall anyway because of high fees.

Protests should be made about the

pr inc ip le .

Gove rn ing Body C h a i r m a n

Henry Fisher said he wou ld

communicate the Governors '

opposit ion but take no further

act ion.

C H E A P F U R N I T U R E

F O R L I N S T E A D

T h e U n i v e r s i t y G r a n t s

Commi t t ee has al located only

£35,000 to furnish the new

L ins tead H a l l extension. A

work ing party has found that

even using the cheapest furniture

ava i lable more money w i l l be

needed. A G o v e r n i n g Body

work ing party is to consider how

more money can be found.

N E W U N I O N C A R D

I C U H o n o r a r y Secretary is

designing next session's U n i o n

C a r d a n d is l o o k i n g for

suggestions for its improvement .

H e has already agreed to inc lude

t h e ' p h o n e n u m b e r s o f

" N i g h t l i n e " and " R e l e a s e " on

the back of the card .

U G M I N Q U O R A C Y

Pub l i c i t y for U n i o n Meet ings

has been better than last year but

t h e r e is s t i l l r o o m 1 o r

improvement , accord ing to a

paper on inquoracy at U G M s

p r e p a r e d b y t h e U n i o n

Permanent W o r k i n g Party .

T h e P W P has suggested

improved poster design and wider

advertisement on al l U n i o n

media . They have also proposed

setting up an I C U stall at

Freshers' Fa i r and a shorter, more

readable, Freshers' G u i d e to

U G M s . There could be a

permanent display of in format ion

on the U n i o n in the L o w e r

L o u n g e . T o ensure U n i o n

O f f i c e r s b e c o m e k n o w n to

students the C o u n c i l photograph

should be produced early in the

A u t u m n term.

T h e P W P also suggested that

U n i o n M e e t i n g s s h o u l d

automat ica l l y be adjourned at

2.25 p m and that Execut ive

reports should not inc lude any

proposals.