Hora Hedayati

Condolence Letters

A condolence letter expresses feelings of sympathy, care, empathy, and concern when a person close to the reader has recently passed away. Since there is nothing you can really say to make things right, say as little as possible. A few words from the heart and the fact that you took the time to send a personal note are the appropriate communication here.

Definition

Format: Handwritten or typed/word-processed. Personal letterhead.

Style/Tone/Voice: Informal. Personal. Passive or active voice.

Structure: (1) Give the reader your sympathies, (2) Recall a personal anecdote involving the deceased, (3) Tell the reader how your life — and everyone else’s — was made better for having known the person. Handy Phrases: I was saddened to hear; I’m so sorry; I have many fond memories of [name];You have my condolences; I’m thinking of you; My thoughts are with you.

General Instructions

Dear Bert,

Dad told me about Ed’s passing. I am so sorry. You have my condolences.

Ed was a great guy and one of the smartest men I have ever known. I will never forget when he tried out for the TV game show “Who, What, Where, and When” but wasn’t selected because, while he knew every last fact about WW II, he didn’t know the names of Donald Duck’s nephews.

As a kid, I loved coming into Paterson to my dad’s office and stopping by Ed’s pawn shop to see all the watches, coins, and trinkets, which fascinated Ed and me too.

We will all miss him. He is at peace.

Sample Letter

Remember, you are writing not for the dead person, but for the loved ones he or she left behind.

Share a personal story or pleasant memory about the deceased.

Do not make any negative comment about the deceased.

Do not minimize the reader’s grief or sorrow, or the tragedy of the deceased’s passing.

Tips for Writing Condolence

Letters