RUDE MEAN

HARASS

BULLY

DEFINING BAD BEHAVIORS

We hear many concerns about bullying each year.

We need to make a clear distinction between:

• Behavior that is rude

• Behavior that is mean

• Behavior that is characteristic of bullying

How Rude!

RUDE = Adjective

Definitions:

• Not having or showing concern or respect for the

rights and feelings of others

• Offensive in manner or action

Synonyms: crude, rough, unrefined,

uncouth, uncivilized, vulgar

How Rude!

INADVERTENTLY saying or doing something that hurts

Someone else.

Examples of rude behavior:

• Burping in someone’s face

• Cutting in the lunch line

• Bragging about doing better than someone else

Rude behavior tends to be

spontaneous, unplanned, inconsiderate,

based on thoughtlessness,

poor manners or narcissism

THEY’RE JUST SO MEAN!

MEAN = Adjective

Definitions:

• Unkind, cruel, or inconsiderate of others

• Used to describe people who hurt others and

do not feel sorry about it

• Causing or helping to cause suffering

Synonyms: atrocious, barbaric,

barbarous, brutal, brute, butcherly,

fiendish, heartless, inhumane, sadistic,

savage, truculent, vicious, wanton

THEY’RE JUST SO MEAN!

Purposefully saying or doing something to hurt

someone once (or maybe twice).

The main difference between RUDE and MEAN

has to do with INTENTION!

• RUDE behavior is often unintentional

• MEAN behavior aims to hurt someone

Examples of MEAN behavior:

• Criticizing someone’s clothing,

appearance, intelligence, etc.

• Laughing at another’s expense

• Calling someone a name

MEANNESS

Mean Behavior is motivated by angry feelings and/or

the misguided goal of making oneself feel better by

putting someone else down.

Mean Behavior can hurt others; however, meanness

is different from bullying in important ways that need

to be understood.

PEER CONFLICT

• Rude and Mean behaviors often lead to Peer

Conflict.

• Peer conflicts tend to be minor incidents,

disagreements, no injuries involved, a balance of

power exists, no pattern of issues, can be quickly

resolved.

Examples of PEER CONFLICT:

• An argument over the ownership of

an item

• A heated discussion over differing

viewpoints

• Jokingly saying “Hey, stupid!” to

another student

HARASSMENT

Aggressive behavior focused on a student's race, national

origin, religion, color, disability, or sex. Behavior is severe,

persistent or pervasive enough to interfere with a student's

ability to participate in or benefit from school.

Harassment may only occur a single time, but due to the

serious nature it may interfere with a student’s ability to

concentrate in his/her classes.

Examples of HARASSMENT:

• Negative comments about a person’s

religious beliefs

• Teasing a student with a handicap

• Making a verbal assumption about a

person based on their race

BULLYING

BULLYING = Verb

Definitions:

• To treat abusively

• To affect by means of force or coercion

• To use browbeating language or behavior

Synonyms: brutalize, abuse, ill-

treat, ill-use, kick around, maltreat,

manhandle, mess with (slang),

mistreat, misuse

TYPES OF BULLYING

Physical Aggression – Hitting, kicking, punching, beating

people up, spitting, knocking item’s out of others’ hands,

slamming someone’s locker shut, defacing property

Verbal Aggression – Name-calling, making jokes, insults,

racist or sexist comments, put-downs, taunting, threats,

spreading rumors

Relational Aggression – Purposely ignoring, excluding,

embarrassing, humiliating, shunning, hazing, rejecting,

spreading rumors

Cyberbullying – “Willful and repeated harm inflicted through

the use of computers, cell phones, and other electronic

devices.” The likelihood of repeated harm is higher with

cyberbullying because electronic messages can be accessed

by multiple people, resulting in repeated exposure and harm.

BULLYING

BULLYING has three key elements:

• An intent to harm

• Repeated acts or threats of aggressive behavior

• An imbalance of power

People who bully say or do something

to hurt someone on purpose, they

keep doing it with no sense of regret

or remorse, even if the victim shows

he/she is hurt and asks the bully to

stop.

SO WHY MAKE THIS DISTINCTION?

• More attention is being given to bullying like never before,

mostly due to our culture of social media.

• There are now anti-bullying laws in 49 states,

including IDAHO.

• This is significant and now more than ever students

have a voice!

However, we are seeing students and

parents improperly classifying rudeness

and mean behavior as BULLYING.

WHEN YOU REPORT BULLYING

• The information remains anonymous.

• The information goes to an

administrator/counselor.

• An administrator/counselor will follow up on the

report within two school days.

• This tool is not meant to be used for

emergencies.

HOW TO REPORT CONCERNS

• Go to the RHS Home Page.

• Find the “Safety Concern" icon and click on it.

• This will lead you to the reporting site.

• Click on the RHS Reporting Site link.