Great lines from Great lines from youryour descriptive writingdescriptive writing

By: English 11 studentsBy: English 11 students

FantasticFantastic

The beach is always at its best right around sunset. The beach is always at its best right around sunset. Great opening lineGreat opening line

The soft wind rustles the dangling dried pine needles The soft wind rustles the dangling dried pine needles that hang from the reaching branches.that hang from the reaching branches.

Small ripples float across the pale blue water.Small ripples float across the pale blue water. Great detailsGreat details

It reminded me of jagged ice melting in the sun.It reminded me of jagged ice melting in the sun. Gives reader a perspectiveGives reader a perspective

Makes me want to read!Makes me want to read!

The mossy tinted rocks on the shore and the muddy The mossy tinted rocks on the shore and the muddy beach look close to the towering hills in the crisp beach look close to the towering hills in the crisp reflection on the water. reflection on the water.

Glistening under the sun like tiny microscopic Glistening under the sun like tiny microscopic diamonds, it no longer looked like the snow I thought diamonds, it no longer looked like the snow I thought it might be but vast land drenched with sugar, tiny it might be but vast land drenched with sugar, tiny rolling hills of sugar.rolling hills of sugar.

I rise stiffly from my bed of pine needles on the hard, I rise stiffly from my bed of pine needles on the hard, cruel earth. . . . I gaze out eastwards, and on the cruel earth. . . . I gaze out eastwards, and on the horizon a pink glow danced across the sky.horizon a pink glow danced across the sky.

I feel like I’m there!I feel like I’m there!

Stopping to meditate on the top of a hill that Stopping to meditate on the top of a hill that crossed the far end of the lake, I listened to the crossed the far end of the lake, I listened to the sounds of the ducks splashing and wading in sounds of the ducks splashing and wading in and around the water. and around the water. gives us a perspective from which to view the gives us a perspective from which to view the

scenescene It is silent except for the melody coming from It is silent except for the melody coming from

the crackling of a fire in the campsite below.the crackling of a fire in the campsite below. Cameras and reporters surround the players Cameras and reporters surround the players

like bullies.like bullies.

You give me a way to see the scene!You give me a way to see the scene!

As the hot warm breeze picked up a little, I could As the hot warm breeze picked up a little, I could smell hot dogs and hamburgers on a grill. My mouth smell hot dogs and hamburgers on a grill. My mouth started to water like a dog waiting for a piece of started to water like a dog waiting for a piece of steak. steak. describing how the smell affected the writer helps the describing how the smell affected the writer helps the

reader to understand the experiencereader to understand the experience Under the trees the shed leans to the side as if you Under the trees the shed leans to the side as if you

could knock it over with a feather.could knock it over with a feather. The memories of the past were obviously still there. The memories of the past were obviously still there.

As we sat in our pew, the eyes of hatred pressed on us As we sat in our pew, the eyes of hatred pressed on us as if we were the corporations that oppressed them. as if we were the corporations that oppressed them. gives reader a perspective from which to view the scenegives reader a perspective from which to view the scene

If all description was this good . . .If all description was this good . . .

Right in front of me there stand small buildings Right in front of me there stand small buildings huddling together as if the wind could knock them huddling together as if the wind could knock them out in the open. out in the open. nice verbsnice verbs

I . . . hear the bored cows carrying on their I . . . hear the bored cows carrying on their conversations in the pasture. conversations in the pasture. interesting twist on what is seen – a perspectiveinteresting twist on what is seen – a perspective

The feeling of excitement shoots through my veins as The feeling of excitement shoots through my veins as soon as I feel my feet sink into the gritty, branding soon as I feel my feet sink into the gritty, branding sand. sand. shows how the senses affect youshows how the senses affect you

Unfortunately, this is the last slide.Unfortunately, this is the last slide.

A soft breeze tickles my face gently with the salty A soft breeze tickles my face gently with the salty aroma of the ocean. aroma of the ocean. how senses affect youhow senses affect you

This place always reminds me of a dream I once had This place always reminds me of a dream I once had when I was little and I’ll never forget it. when I was little and I’ll never forget it. Clinching line wraps it up and gives perspectiveClinching line wraps it up and gives perspective

The bright green grass flickered in the screaming The bright green grass flickered in the screaming wind.wind. Good verbGood verb