editing for efficiency. we should write the way we talk, only better – ernest hemingway
TRANSCRIPT
Editing for efficiency
• “We should write the way we talk, only better” – Ernest Hemingway
Tips for the editing process
• Fix mistakes before fiddling with writing.
Tips for the editing process
• Fix mistakes before fiddling with writing.
• Cut words, don’t add words.
Tips for the editing process
• Fix mistakes before fiddling with writing.
• Cut words, don’t add words.
• Rewrite weak passives.
Tips for the editing process
• Fix mistakes before fiddling with writing.
• Cut words, don’t add words.
• Rewrite weak passives.
• Make sure the subject is near the verb.
Tips for the editing process
• Fix mistakes before fiddling with writing.
• Cut words, don’t add words.
• Rewrite weak passives.
• Make sure the subject is near the verb.
• Vary sentence length.
Tips for the editing process
• Fix mistakes before fiddling with writing.
• Cut words, don’t add words.
• Rewrite weak passives.
• Make sure the subject is near the verb.
• Vary sentence length.
• Use first-degree words (house, business and office instead of domicile, establishment and facility.)
Wrong words: Don’t use these
• Alright (all right)
• Irregardless (regardless, irrespective)
• Towards, Backwards (lose the “s”)
• Wreckless (reckless)
Crutch words: Don’t misuse these
Hopefully
• WRONG: Hopefully, Dave will get here on time.
• RIGHT: I hope Dave will get here on time.
• RIGHT: At dinner time, my dog looked up at me hopefully.
Crutch words: Don’t misuse these
Hopefully
• WRONG: Hopefully, Dave will get here on time.
• RIGHT: I hope Dave will get here on time.
• RIGHT: At dinner time, my dog looked up at me hopefully.
Basically – it’s NOT the same as “and that’s all there is to it,” or “and it’s simple enough.”
WRONG: Basically, you just turn this knob and shove this lever forward.
RIGHT: The proposal is basically sound (means fundamentally).
Misused words• Like -- He feels like he was personally repudiated. Using “like” in place of “as
if” is colloquial and should be avoided.
Misused words• Like -- He feels like he was personally repudiated. Using “like” in place of “as
if” is colloquial and should be avoided.
• Literally -- The three-year varsity player literally carried the team to victory in
the Catholic League tournament championship.
Misused words• Like -- He feels like he was personally repudiated. Using “like” in place of “as
if” is colloquial and should be avoided.
• Literally -- The three-year varsity player literally carried the team to victory in
the Catholic League tournament championship.
• Following -- Do not use following as a preposition.
Misused words• Like -- He feels like he was personally repudiated. Using “like” in place of “as
if” is colloquial and should be avoided.
• Literally -- The three-year varsity player literally carried the team to victory in
the Catholic League tournament championship.
• Following -- Do not use following as a preposition.
• Dilemma -- The word means a choice between two equally unpleasant options –
not just a problem or difficulty
Misused words• Like -- He feels like he was personally repudiated. Using “like” in place of “as
if” is colloquial and should be avoided.
• Literally -- The three-year varsity player literally carried the team to victory in
the Catholic League tournament championship.
• Following -- Do not use following as a preposition.
• Dilemma -- The word means a choice between two equally unpleasant options –
not just a problem or difficulty
• Over, more than– Over is for height, and more than is for number
Misused words• Like -- He feels like he was personally repudiated. Using “like” in place of “as
if” is colloquial and should be avoided.
• Literally -- The three-year varsity player literally carried the team to victory in
the Catholic League tournament championship.
• Following -- Do not use following as a preposition.
• Dilemma -- The word means a choice between two equally unpleasant options –
not just a problem or difficulty
• Fewer, less – use fewer to compare quantities
• Over, more than– Over is for height, and more than is for number
Wordy constructions
At that that point in time
At this time
Due to the fact that
In the course of
In the near future
Located at
Often times
On one occasion
Once in a great while
Previous to
Subsequent to
Went on to say
During the summer months
In reference to
Redundancies
Traded to another team
Has good speed
Set a new record
Completely destroy
Ultimate outcome
Very unique
Acute crisis
Basic essentials
Large in size
Climb up
Dead body
End result
Depreciate in value
Few in number
Follow after
Free gift
Hot-water heater
Passive voice, weak verb construction
Accusations were leveled by each side that the other initiated the first shooting, but both sides said they still had intentions to honor the truce.
Passive voice, weak verb construction
Accusations were leveled by each side that the other initiated the first shooting, but both sides said they still had intentions to honor the truce.
Each side accused the other of shooting first, but both said they intended to honor the truce.
Passive voice, weak verb construction
Every morning the three professors rode in the same car pool to their jobs in the history department, but among them, they almost never had a civil word to say.
Passive voice, weak verb construction
Every morning the three professors rode in the same car pool to their jobs in the history department, but among them, they almost never had a civil word to say.
Every morning the three professors carpooled to the history department, arguing all the way.
Passive voice, weak verb construction
Approaching maturity in the urban enclave of South Birmingham without benefit of paternal guidance, Roy Jefferes was cognizant of the syndrome of temptations and frustrations that leads a sizable proportion of adolescent males to gravitate toward criminal activity.
Passive voice, weak verb construction
Approaching maturity in the urban enclave of South Birmingham without benefit of paternal guidance, Roy Jefferes was cognizant of the syndrome of temptations and frustrations that leads a sizable proportion of adolescent males to gravitate toward criminal activity.
Growing up without a father in urban South Birmingham, Roy Jefferes knew well the temptations and frustrations that lead many young men toward a life of crime.
Passive voice, weak verb construction
Approaching maturity in the urban enclave of South Birmingham without benefit of paternal guidance, Roy Jefferes was cognizant of the syndrome of temptations and frustrations that leads a sizable proportion of adolescent males to gravitate toward criminal activity.
Growing up without a father in urban South Birmingham, Roy Jefferes knew well the temptations and frustrations that lead many young men toward a life of crime.
Growing up without a father on the streets of South Birmingham, Roy Jefferes knew firsthand the psychological tug-of-war that drags too many young men into the trap of what they call “thug life.”
Passive voice
The chemical dumping was allowed by insufficient government regulation.
Strong verbs
Two hot dogs were consumed by the boy in less than 20 seconds.
Strong verbs
Two hot dogs were consumed by the boy in less than 20 seconds.
The boy quickly and hungrily ate two hot dogs in less than 20 seconds.
Strong verbs
Two hot dogs were consumed by the boy in less than 20 seconds.
The boy quickly and hungrily ate two hot dogs in less than 20 seconds.
The boy inhaled two hot dogs in less than 20 seconds.
Strong verbs
The hill was climbed by the children.
Strong verbs
The hill was climbed by the children.
The children climbed the hill in a hurried fashion.
Strong verbs
The hill was climbed by the children.
The children climbed the hill in a hurried fashion.
The children scrambled up the hill.
Strong verbs
The legislators were engaged in heated debate about the bill.
Strong verbs
The legislators were engaged in heated debate about the bill.
The legislators clashed over the bill.