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“You Don’t Stop Laughing Because You Grow Old ...
You Grow Old Because You Stop Laughing”
Compiled and Introduced by Laurie Menzies
Young at HeartA Collection of Drawings and Memories
from Bill Menzie
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I loved being with my Dad. Anytime. Anywhere. We were just happy to be together. I am still learning how to live in this world without him.
He made me a book, A Father’s Legacy. In it he wrote, “I want people to smile more.”
He taught me to “kick the habit” by clicking my heels from side to side as we walked through a parking lot. He always had change in his pocket for a penny bubble gum.
He told me that if I could put salt on a bird’s tail, I would be able to catch it. We have home movies of me at the age of two, running through the yard with a salt shaker.
He used to let me do “the wheelbarrow” up the stairs to bed. He always had a candy bar hidden somewhere to bring out as a surprise while we watched TV.
After a night of snow, he would ask, “Did you hear it snow last night? I couldn’t sleep, it was so loud!”
When I called from college and asked for a “real” Christmas tree, Mom said they were too expensive. So Dad cut one down from the front of our lawn! (It was beautiful!)
Standing at the back of the Church when my sister married for the second time, Daddy said to her, “I’ll keep doing this until you get it right.”
I lived with Mom and Dad during law school. I liked to watch the news shows in the morning. Daddy would say, “Why do you want to hear all that bad stuff to start your day? You should decide to be happy instead.” Then he would turn off the television and play
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Jimmy Durante, singing, “You gotta’ start off each day with a song, even when things go wrong...”
Two good lines he would say at the end of a party were:
“I’ve had a nice time .......... but this wasn’t it!” or “We’ve been kicked out of better places than this ....”
After his service in WWII, he drove a trolley and bus for the NFTA. Then he got a job at the post office. He worked hard to support his family, but never put work ahead of us. He didn’t derive his sense of self from what he did to make money, but rather by those with whom he shared his life. I can’t recall an instance that he didn’t have time for me.
Somehow I thought I needed to be the best at everything. Dad wanted me to be happy whatever happened. I always wanted to get an “A” on every exam. When I did, he would say I was a “fart smeller!”
Oh, how he loved to sing. Everybody Loves Somebody was his standard (he sang it on stage once, with The Lettermen). He always tried to get everyone to sing When You’re Smiling with him. We sang his favorite song, A Dreamer’s Holiday, at my wedding. Daddy was 91 when he finally walked me down the aisle—he sang all night!
His favorite leisure activity was dancing with my Mom. The dance floor would clear and everyone would watch them. They actually won a trip to New York City in a dance contest in 1951. They did a dance called The Shag.
He lived longer than he might have because of Mom. I know he tried to stay alive because he didn’t want to leave her.
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I’ve never known a greater love than Dad had for Mom. It’s the greatest love story I can tell. He loved Mom so much that he gave her another baby after being married for 23 years (me)! They were married 70 years before he died.
Daddy knew Christmas of 2011 would be his last. He asked how much money he had left and said, “Your Mother needs a diamond.” They had the best Christmas together, and she got a diamond ring.
He loved pancakes with maple syrup, meatloaf, macaroni & cheese, root beer floats and fried bologna & onions at the ball game.
When I was growing up, my summer nights meant watching baseball with Daddy on the couch. When I was older, we would go to watch the Buffalo Bisons with Mom. The best part of every game was singing Take Me Out to the Ballgame and eating Perry’s soft ice cream.
Daddy tried to get me to realize that it wasn’t anything I did that made him love me; he loved me for just being me. As an example, I remember how useful I felt “holding down” the leaves under the tarp behind the mower … all I had to do was sit there!
He taught me to “direct my feet to the sunny side of the street” and to “let a smile be my umbrella” and that “when you’re smiling, the whole world smiles with you.” We had a song for everything.
He used to call me on the phone and sing, “I just called to say I love you …”
He was my roller coaster partner. I’ll never forget the first time he told me I was big enough to ride the Comet at Crystal Beach! We even rode the Coney Island roller coaster (in Las Vegas) together, when he was 85!
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He used to drive down our road with me perched on the back of the convertible so I could wave like Miss America.
He taught me how to sound like the Wizard of Oz by talking through a bedroom window fan.
Daddy asked me a few years ago, “Who wants to live to be 100?” When I didn’t know, he said “Probably the guy who is 99!”
He would always say, “I can’t wait until tomorrow ...” and, if I forgot and asked why, the same answer always came “... because I get better looking every day!”
At the end of his Father’s Legacy book, it asked the question, “What word best describes your life?” He wrote: “Happy. We were happy to be together.”
He was “alive” every day and content wherever he was, doing whatever was in front of him. He lived with gratitude and humor and tried to make everyone around him happy.
He taught me how to draw and do lettering so I could always make a nice card. We read the comics together every Sunday after church.
He never complained as his physical abilities were taken away or weakened by age. When he couldn’t walk, he began to write and draw. At age 94, he would draw a cartoon each day and we would laugh together. Now I share his cartoons with you, so Daddy can give you a smile too.
My Dad truly stayed forever young at heart.
— Laurie Menzies
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Daddy, about 3 years old
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Bill and Dorothy — 1941
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The Future Mr. and Mrs. Menzie
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Spending the Day at Vidler’s in East Aurora
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Dad in the Dog House
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Dad with his back-up singers — The Lettermen Las Vegas, 1977
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Mom and Dad — 1939
Mom and Dad — 2007
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Mom’s 85th Birthday (Dad was 92)
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Dad with his 1937 Packard
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Dad’s Favorite Song: “A Dreamer’s Holiday”* *Music by Mabel Wayne, Lyrics by Kim Gannon — 1949
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A Dreamer’s Holiday
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(Dad started ignoring the printed questions and began writing whatever he liked instead.)
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Dad and Laurie at Laurie’s Wedding — 2007
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Take Me Out to the Ballgame
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Me, my brother Billy, Dad and my sister Marilyn
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Dad at the Table Drawing Another Cartoon
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Daddy created the drawings in this book at the age of 94. At that time, he had lost the ability to walk without assistance and we were told he needed full-time care.
My family was blessed that Dad was able to stay in his home and draw at his own table. It was possible because he and Mom had created a Plan for Aging.
As their daughter, I wanted my parents to be happy. As their Elder Law Attorney, I understood the need to have a plan.
Every day, I help older people and their families find and pay for the care they need. In my parents’ case, we utilized a program called the Nursing Home Transition and Diversion Waiver, offered by New York State Medicaid. This program allows qualifying seniors to remain in their homes while receiving care that would otherwise have to be provided in a nursing home. Because of this plan, Mom and Dad were able to live together through 70 years of marriage before he died.
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At Pfalzgraf, Beinhauer & Menzies, LLP, we create an individualized Plan for Aging for each of our clients.
This Plan for Aging coordinates your legal, financial and health care needs so you or your loved one can age with peace of mind.
We do this by:
• Organizing financial resources to determine a baseline for your plan
• Making sure your legal documents are coordinated to preserve and distribute your assets most effectively
• Working with a Geriatric Care Manager to determine the best plan for your care and safety
• Maximizing the use of public benefits and private resources to reach your goal
If you have questions, concerns, or would like a consultation, please feel free to call us at 716.204.1055.
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92
455 Cayuga Road, Suite 600Buffalo, New York 14225
716.204.1055
(w) PBMLawyers.com(e) [email protected]
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