sentencessentences

sentences

How to develop a paragragh by connecting details?

A sentence is a group of words expressing a complete idea.

A paragraph is a group of ______ expressing a complete idea.

sentences

I followed your advice.

I went to the

supermarket. There I

found four chairs. They

were in good shape. They

were reasonably priced.

gossipy & wordy

I walked through the city

for days, but I couldn’t

find any place to rent, and

then I found this

apartment, and it is large,

so I feel it comfortable.

what makes it so

boring?

My writings include a novel,

which was published and

which is about a mystery,

and a number of poems that

were left in the desk that

belongs to my brother Tom

and that have not been

published.

Can you fully

understand?

A good paragraph should be:

concise:简洁的

clear

tight:

graceful:

Use fewest words to say the most;

Don’t use masses of “ands”, “buts”, “ors”, etc.

Be pleasant to read.

well-connected

Following your advice, I went to the

supermarket where I found four

reasonably priced chairs in good

shape.

I followed your advice.I went to the

supermarket. There I found four

chairs. They were in good shape. They

were reasonably priced.

One summer holiday, my parents went to

Shanghai. They took my sister with them.

时间原因在句首 ,限定位中间 ,结果伴随在句尾

The gold was hidden under the ground.

It was safe for many years.

Hidden under the floorboards, the gold

was safe for many years.

One summer holiday, my parents went to Shanghai, taking my sister with them.

The house has been turned into apartments.I was born in the house.

You will have a room in my house. The room is very comfortable. In this room, you will find many things which are quite necessary for daily life.

You will have a comfortable room in my

house, where you can find all the

necessary things for daily life.

Joe, who is a lawyer with the family, accompanied them as an interpreter.

Joe, a lawyer with the family, accompanied them as an interpreter.

Use clauses when

necessary.

The man that is talking with Mary is my brother.

The man talking with Mary is my brother.

The fire is burning, so I feel

warm.

I lost my bike, so I had to walk

home.

When he saw his class teacher,he ran away immediately.

With the fire burning, I feel warm.

With my bike lost, I had to walk

home.

On/upon seeing his class teacher, he

ran away immediately.

Tight & concise & clear & graceful

I walked through

the city for

days,but I

couldn’t find any

place to rent, and

then I found this

apartment, and it

is large, so I feel

it comfortable.

After walking

through the city

for days, I rented this large and comfortable apartment.

Tight & concise & clear & graceful

My writings include a novel, which was published and which is about a mystery, and a number of poems that were left in the desk that belongs to my brother Tom and that have not been published.

My writings include a published novel about a mystery and a number of unpublished poems left in my brother Tom’s desk.

Tight & concise & clear & graceful

Tom is four years old and he is energetic. One

day a bike was given to him. The bike is new and it is a light blue color. Tom received the bike for his birthday. He struggled to ride his bike. He struggled for two hours. However, he was unsuccessful in riding the bike. Four-year-old Tom is energetic. One day, he got a light blue bike for his birthday. He struggled for two hours to ride it, but he was unsuccessful.

Tight & concise & clear & graceful

The animal trainer dove into the pool. The trainer was skilled and athletic. She was excited when she dove into the pool. She swam with two dolphins. The dolphins were babies. The dolphins were playful. The trainer swam with the dolphins for over an hour. When the trainer swam with the dolphins, she was happy.

The skilled, athletic animal trainer excitedly dove into the pool and happily swam for over an hour with two playful baby dolphins.

naked boys

cover…with

smiling driver

What’s going on in his mind?

What happened?

What’s going on in your mind?

We can see two boys in the

picture. They are

naked.

They are covering their bodies

with their hands.

What could have happened to

them?

He is smiling, and probably is thinking

about… What does this picture remind you of?

There is a driver in front of them.

What we can see in the picture are two

little boys, naked, covering their bodies

with their hands. They might have been

swimming a few minutes ago, then got

out of the pool only to find their clothes

taken away. In front of them sits the

driver, smiling, and probably thinking

about his own childhood. Any of us

could have been in such an

embarrassing situation when we were

young. I wish I were the driver. Then, I

would tell them the story of my own so

as to make them feel better.

My home town is Ningbo.It is located on the East Sea.It is a beautiful place for people to live in. Now New factories and houses have been built.Its economy has been developing rapidly in the past ten years.It has brought about many comforts for local people.They were unexpected in the past. However,there are some problems,such as water and air pollution and heavy traffic in rush hours.They have now become a common concern in our daily life. In my opinion, Ningbo should develop its economy scientifically. I would also think that the growth of population should be brought under control so that it may prosper for ever.

My home town Ningbo, a beautiful place for people to live in , is located on the East Sea. Now with new factories and houses built,its economy has been developing rapidly in the past ten years,bring about many unexpected comforts for local people. However, some problems,such as water and air pollution and heavy traffic in rush hours. have now become a common concern in our daily life. In my opinion, Ningbo should develop its economy scientifically. Meanwhile,the growth of population should be brought under control for its lasting prosperity.

It is often better to risk perfection than boredom.

1.Practice

!

Tips

2.Practice

!3.practice

!Practice makes

perfect!

Thank you!

3. 通过分句和合句，增强句子的连贯性和表现力。

[ 原文 ]We had a short rest .Then we began to play happily .We sang and danced .Some told stories. Some played chess.

[ 修正 ]After a short rest ,we had great fun singing and dancing ,telling jokes and playing chess.

[ 原文 ]My brother was riding the bike and I sat on the seat behind him .

[ 修正 ]My brother was riding the bike with me sitting on the seat behind.

I’ve found a place for you. It is a flat on the third floor. It is 25 square metres. There is a bedroom and a bathroom in it. There is a sofa and a kitchen in the bedroom. There is a chair and a desk in the bedroom, too.

I’ve found a flat for you. It’s a flat of 25 square metres with a bedroom, a bathroom and a kitchen. In the bedroom, there is a sofa, a bed, a chair and a desk.

书面表达：

7. She walked out of the lab and many students followed her. ( 使用过去分词 )

8. When he spoke, he felt more and more excited. （使用句型结构）

9. Because the weather is fine, many people went to climb the Western hill. （使用独立主格结构）

by many students, she walked out of the lab.

, a large number of people went to climb the Western Hills.

he spoke, excited he felt.

丰富的语法结构 (Exercises 3)

Followed

The more the more

The weather being fine

丰富的语法结构 (Exercises 1)1. When he arrives, please give me an e-ma

il. （使用 V-ing 形式） .

2. To his surprise, the little girl knows so many things. （使用名词性从句）

3. He came in and there was a baby in his arms. ( 用 with 结构 )

, please give me an e-mail.

is that the little girl knows so many things.

On his arriving

What surprises him

He came in , with a baby in his arms.

1. Who do you think stole the Moonstone ? How good are you r detective skills ?

2. Work in pairs to discuss the different people who might have stolen the diamond. Decide who you think took it. Give reasons for your answers.

Tight & concise & clear & graceful

We had a short rest .Then we began to play happily .We sang and danced .Some told stories. Some played chess.

After a short rest ,we had great fun singing and dancing ,telling jokes and playing chess.

Tight & concise & clear & graceful

I’ve found a place for you. It is a flat on the third floor. It is 25 square metres. There is a bedroom and a bathroom in it. There is a sofa and a kitchen in the bedroom. There is a chair and a desk in the bedroom, too.

I’ve found a flat for you. It’s a flat of 25 square metres with a bedroom, a bathroom and a kitchen. In the bedroom, there is a sofa, a bed, a chair and a desk.