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Bell WorkThink about a time you had a emotional/intense conversation that was a pivotal point in your life, either personal or career related.

What were you hoping to get out of that conversation? How did you feel before it?

How did the conversation actually go? Why did it go well or poorly? How did you feel when you walked away?

Approaching Difficult Conversations

What makes a conversation crucial?

Strong Emotions

Differing Opinions

High Stakes

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It’s not about communication, it’s about results.

Start with what you really wantfor yourself

for othersfor the relationship

how would you behave to get what you want? and avoid what

you don’t want?

Share your facts

Tell your story

Ask for others’ facts and stories

Have Open dialogue

Move to Action

Conversation Outline

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Pool of Shared MeaningSharing your facts and story and getting it from the other side as well

My truth with your truth is OUR truth

Opinions, feelings, theories, experiences

More accurate information and more buy-in as you work toward a solution, builds unity

Don’t be a SuckerIf you lose track of what you want, the conversation is a waste of time, don’t talk just to talk

Your emotions can sabotage you throughout the conversation, know yourself and how you react to conflict

Be mindful of your word choice, what are you achieving with the words you’re using?

AttackingPunishing

Keeping the peace Being rightWinning

Saving face

Keeping a conversation safeu Are your words encouraging the other person to

share their viewpoint?

u Are your words attacking the other individual or promoting a team-building culture

u Mutual Purpose: care about each other’s goals and motives

u Mutual Respect: do they believe you respect them?

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Move to Actionu After both sides share their facts and story, brainstorm

solutions to the problem that both sides will support

u Discussion how the decision will be made

u Remember that dialogue is not decision making, we are here for results!

u Who will do What by When

u Following up (Who, How, Time frame)

It’s not about communication, it’s about results.