Debilitative EmotionsDebilitative Emotionsinin

Interpersonal CommunicationInterpersonal Communication

EmotionsEmotions

What are emotions?What are emotions?

How do we “pick up on” our on How do we “pick up on” our on emotions and those of other emotions and those of other people?people?

4 Parts of Our Emotions4 Parts of Our Emotions

Physiological ChangesPhysiological Changes Nonverbal ReactionsNonverbal Reactions Cognitive InterpretationsCognitive Interpretations Verbal ExpressionVerbal Expression

Physiological ChangesPhysiological Changes

““Bodily changes such as:Bodily changes such as:

• Increased Heart RateIncreased Heart Rate• Rise in Blood PressureRise in Blood Pressure• Adrenaline RushAdrenaline Rush• Pupil Dilation Pupil Dilation

Nonverbal ReactionsNonverbal Reactions

External bodily External bodily changes such changes such as:as:

• Blushing orBlushing or• PerspiringPerspiring

Behavioral Behavioral changes such changes such as:as:

• Facial Facial expressionexpression

• PosturePosture• GesturesGestures• Vocal toneVocal tone• Rate of Speech Rate of Speech

Nonverbal ReactionsNonverbal Reactions

Try to smile and Try to smile and stay sad at the stay sad at the same time for same time for 15 mins 15 mins straight… its straight… its difficult to do…difficult to do…

-Alder, Rosenfeld, & Proctor, 2007-Alder, Rosenfeld, & Proctor, 2007

Emotions Lead to Nonvervals

Nonverbals Lead to Emotions

Cognitive InterpretationsCognitive Interpretations

Our interpretations of our Our interpretations of our physical state contribute to our physical state contribute to our experience of emotion.experience of emotion.

Nervous or ExcitedNervous or Excited

Verbal ExpressionVerbal Expression

Verbal expression of ourVerbal expression of our

• Physiological ChangesPhysiological Changes• Nonverbal Reactions andNonverbal Reactions and• Cognitive InterpretationsCognitive Interpretations

help us to accurately check our help us to accurately check our perceptions in interpersonal perceptions in interpersonal interactions.interactions.

Example:Example:

One evening you are walking One evening you are walking across campus by yourself in across campus by yourself in the dark. As you walk into a the dark. As you walk into a very dark stretch of the walk very dark stretch of the walk way, you hear a low growl near way, you hear a low growl near you ankles. A moving car you ankles. A moving car passes as you pick up your passes as you pick up your pace and you see the shadow of pace and you see the shadow of something with VERY large something with VERY large teeth following you…teeth following you…

… … Scary thing continuedScary thing continued

If this were you, how might you If this were you, how might you respond (physically, respond (physically, nonverbally, verbally)?nonverbally, verbally)?

What might you be thinking What might you be thinking (cognitive interpretation)? (cognitive interpretation)?

What Influences Our What Influences Our Emotions? Emotions?

PersonalityPersonality CultureCulture Biological Sex Biological Sex

and Genderand Gender Social Social

ConventionsConventions Social RolesSocial Roles

Fear of Self-Fear of Self-DisclosureDisclosure

Emotional Emotional Contagion: Contagion:

““emotions are emotions are infectious”infectious”

POP QUIZ!!!!!POP QUIZ!!!!!

1.1. What are the three types of What are the three types of Interpersonal Goals? Interpersonal Goals?

(hint: from Cody text, chapter 1: (hint: from Cody text, chapter 1: instrumental, relational, self-instrumental, relational, self-presentation.)presentation.)

POP QUIZ!!!!!POP QUIZ!!!!!

2.2. Will all people have the same Will all people have the same interpersonal goals at the interpersonal goals at the same time? Example?same time? Example?

3.3. What happens when people What happens when people have incompatible goals?have incompatible goals?

… … Enter Conflict.Enter Conflict.

Cody et. al. define Cody et. al. define conflictconflict as as the the perception perception of incompatible of incompatible goals.goals.

““Inaccurate perceptions of Inaccurate perceptions of ourselves and others can ourselves and others can generate a wide range of generate a wide range of emotions that interfere with emotions that interfere with effective communication.” effective communication.”

- Adler, Rosenfeld, & Proctor, p220 - Adler, Rosenfeld, & Proctor, p220

Managing Difficult EmotionsManaging Difficult Emotions

Facilitative Facilitative Emotions:Emotions:

Contribute to Contribute to effective effective functioning.functioning.

Debilitative Debilitative Emotions:Emotions:

Hinder or prevent Hinder or prevent effective effective interpersonal interpersonal communication.communication.

Managing Difficult EmotionsManaging Difficult Emotions

Difference between facilitative Difference between facilitative and debilitative emotions are the and debilitative emotions are the intensity and duration of the intensity and duration of the emotion.emotion. Example: difference between Example: difference between

sadness and depression.sadness and depression.

Managing Difficult EmotionsManaging Difficult EmotionsPeople’s interpretations of events People’s interpretations of events

determine their feelings:determine their feelings:

Activating Activating EventEvent

Thought or Thought or BeliefBelief

ConsequencesConsequences

Being Being called called namesnames

I’ve done I’ve done something something wrongwrong

Hurt, upsetHurt, upset

Being Being called called namesnames

My friend My friend is mentally is mentally illill

Pity, sympathyPity, sympathy

Difficult EmotionsDifficult Emotions

StressStress

AngerAnger

StressStress What are stressful situations for What are stressful situations for

you?you?

StressStress

Stress can be defined as a Stress can be defined as a nonspecific, general response nonspecific, general response on the body, signaling the need on the body, signaling the need to adapt or external or internal to adapt or external or internal states.states.

Parallel to the physiological Parallel to the physiological component of all emotions.component of all emotions.

Can be facilitative or debilitative.Can be facilitative or debilitative.

Responses to StressResponses to Stress

What are some ways we might What are some ways we might respond to facilitative stress?respond to facilitative stress?

((Excitement before a performanceExcitement before a performance))

What are some ways we might What are some ways we might respond to debilitative stress?respond to debilitative stress?

((Anxiety about meting new peopleAnxiety about meting new people))

Harmful Responses to StressHarmful Responses to Stress

Loneliness, isolation, and lack of Loneliness, isolation, and lack of social support during periods of social support during periods of stress create physiological stress create physiological damage and aggravate the damage and aggravate the effects of stress. (Johnson, effects of stress. (Johnson, 2006)2006)

AngerAnger

One of the most common emotions One of the most common emotions involved in conflict is angerinvolved in conflict is anger

““Anger is a defensive, emotional Anger is a defensive, emotional reaction that occurs when other reaction that occurs when other people frustrate your attempts to people frustrate your attempts to accomplish something, interfere with accomplish something, interfere with your plans, make you feel belittled your plans, make you feel belittled and rejected, or indicate that you and rejected, or indicate that you have no value or importance.” have no value or importance.” ((Johnson, 307)Johnson, 307)

AngerAnger

Many people view anger as a Many people view anger as a negative emotion.negative emotion.

Destructive anger is a debilitative Destructive anger is a debilitative emotion. However, “about 33 to emotion. However, “about 33 to 67% of the time, the [constructive] 67% of the time, the [constructive] expression of anger seems to result expression of anger seems to result in a more positive relationship and in a more positive relationship and increased understanding of the other increased understanding of the other person, oneself, and the problem.” person, oneself, and the problem.” ((Johnson, 307)Johnson, 307)

AngerAnger

Constructive expression of Constructive expression of anger:anger: Involves both peopleInvolves both people Frames the anger in terms of Frames the anger in terms of

solving a mutual problem rather solving a mutual problem rather than as a chance to vent feelings.than as a chance to vent feelings.

Anger and ConflictAnger and Conflict

Focusing on the TaskFocusing on the Task Remember that conflict is Remember that conflict is the the

perceptionperception of incompatible goals. of incompatible goals. Determine the interpersonal goals.Determine the interpersonal goals. How might these goals be How might these goals be

compatible? compatible? Assert yourselfAssert yourself

Assert YourselfAssert Yourself

Nonassertive behaviorNonassertive behavior: often : often involves letting other people involves letting other people violate your personal right to be violate your personal right to be treated with respect and dignity.treated with respect and dignity.

Aggressive behaviorAggressive behavior: involves : involves expressing thoughts, feelings, expressing thoughts, feelings, and opinions in a way that and opinions in a way that violates other’s rights to be violates other’s rights to be treated with respect and dignity.treated with respect and dignity.

Assert YourselfAssert Yourself

Assertive behaviorAssertive behavior: involves : involves describing your feelings, describing your feelings, thoughts, opinions, and thoughts, opinions, and preferences directly to another preferences directly to another person in an honest and person in an honest and appropriate way that respects appropriate way that respects both individuals.both individuals.