chapter 15 friendships
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Chapter 15Friends
What Do Friends Provide? Emotional support
› Reassurance, acceptance, understanding
Models for imitation› Teach social and
emotional skills Opportunities to
practice roles› Time for growth and
new experiences
Type of Friendships Most teens find it easier to
be friends with the same age and the same interests› Don’t miss out on
opportunities to be friends with children; they look up to teens
› Children want to imitate teens
› You as a teen can learn responsibility to understand their needs and how to meet them.
Types of Friendships Male to male
› Tend to share interests and activities with friends
Opposite gender friendships› Can help see issues from
that gender’s point of view
Female to female› Like to share personal
concerns and emotional intimate feeling
Types of Friendships Adult friendships
› Older adults offer benefits of their experiences as well as personal friendships.
› They can help put your problems into proper perspective and you as a teen can give them companionship
Other backgrounds› Can bring insights and
information that you might not normally encounter
Making Friends
This can be difficult when the following are a factor:› Shy› Low self-
esteem› Lack of
experience
Some things to realize
You need to realize that you are worthy of being a friend; you have qualities and abilities that people will appreciate
You may fear rejection when taking the first step
Realize that nothing is lost by trying Keep trying until you find what works
for you
What do I do to make friends?
Smile Speak first Introduce yourself Ask simple
questions to get things started
Give sincere compliments
Focus on others instead of yourself
Qualities that a friend will look for…
Friendly and cheerful Courteous Clean, neat, well-
groomed Interest in other
people A good listener Easy to get along with Good sense of humor
Where to look for friends…
Part-time job Community events Community centers Become a volunteer School functions Develop a new
interest Join a team
How do you maintain friendships?
Oldest and strongest friendships require the most work› Tend to take each other for granted› You become less kind and considerate› Accept friends› Encourage friends in their goals/praise
them› Apologize when you hurt friends› Be loyal, reliable and share with each other
Reciprocity
Mutual give and take in the relationship Does not mean that you will always
agree on everything with your friend Honesty is also an important part of
friendship Need to respect each other and accept
difference of opinions
Challenges of Friendships
Peer pressure – attempt to influence someone in a similar age group› May be positive or negative› True friends do not ask a friend to do
something that they are uncomfortable with
› No one can make you do something you do not want to do When you want to be accepted and are
sensitive to criticism this becomes difficult
Challenges of Friendships
Handling peer pressure› High self esteem helps to see proper
perspective Competition
› Can be healthy or hazardous Popularity – to be liked and accepted
by many› Develop positive traits and care about
others› Don’t worry about trying to be popular
Challenges
Loneliness› Do not have to be alone to be lonely› “Giving in” to these feelings increases the
feeling› Friendships is sharing weaknesses as well
as strengths› Loneliness must be overcome with action› Feel afraid others will not accept them
This causes them to withdraw
Cliques
Groups that become exclusive, deliberately rejecting people
May scorn or ignore others outside the clique
Can cause hurt feelings
Troubled Friendships
Happens because people grow and change
The friends have less in common
Ending a Friendship
If a friendship is causing you trouble/affecting your life…› End the friendship
When specific problems occur…› Deal directly with the friend
Break off a friendship with tact and concern› Express feelings without blaming or
judging the other person
Feelings after a loss of a friend Feel sad Feel lonely Maybe guilty or
blame self Time helps lessen
pain
The End!
Do you have the qualities of a good friend?