Chapter 11Emotional and Social Development from 1 to 3

Chapter Objectives• IDENTIFY the factors that contribute to a child’s

emotional development• DESCRIBE six specific emotions children ages 18

months to 3-years show• LIST the four signs of a healthy relationship between

parents and a child• IDENTIFY four ways to help children get adequate

sleep• COMPARE AND CONTRAST parallel play and

cooperative play• LIST six ways to help children develop social skills• EXPLAIN the purpose of guidance

Chapter 11.1

Emotional Development from 1 to 3

Emotional Patterns• Emotional development

tends to go in cycles throughout childhood▫ Especially noticeable

during this age group• New emotions are

developed• Periods of frustration and

rebellion▫ Periods of happiness,

calmness, and stability

Individual Differences

•There are general patterns to how children develop emotionally

•Very noticeable between 1st and 3rd birthdays

•Emotional development depends on 2 factors▫The child’s experiences▫The child’s temperament

Temperament is the way a child reacts to other people and events

Eighteen (18) Months• Self-centered

▫ Refers to the thinking about one’s own needs and wants and not those of others

• Caregivers begin teaching a child that some desires will not be met right away

• Spoken instructions are not always successful for children at this age▫ “No” is a favorite word

18 Months- Negativism• Negativism is normal for a

young toddler▫ Negativism means doing the

opposite of what others want▫ Number of causes

The desire for independence Children want the chance

to make the decision Frustration

Toddlers want to do more than their bodies will allow

The realizations of being a separate person Exciting and frightening Still want a tight bond

with caregivers

▫ Battle of Wills between parents and caregivers

▫ Preventing conflicts Eliminate as many

restrictions Put fragile objects

away instead of saying “don’t touch”

18 Months- Positive Guidance• Positive guidance can help

deal with a child that is negative▫ Give choices

“Which will you pick up first- the books or the toys?”

▫ Redirect the Child Distract the child from the

issue that is causing the negative response

EX: Julia was having trouble stacking blocks. Mom asked if she wanted to read a book

▫ Encourage Talking “What’s wrong?” or “Don’t

you like that?”

18 Months-Temper Tantrums• Temper tantrum is when a

child releases anger or frustration by▫ screaming▫ crying▫ kicking and pounding▫ sometimes holding their

breath• Sometimes occur till ages

3 or 4• Try to help the child find a

calmer way of expressing feelings

• Handling Tantrums▫ Distract the child with a toy or

pointing out an activity elsewhere

▫ One at home? Try to ignore it▫ One in public? Take the child

to a quiet spot to cool down▫ Remain calm and speak quietly

but firmly▫ Acknowledge the child’s

feelings and restate why the child’s demands cannot be met

▫ Set limits▫ Keep toddlers from hurting

themselves or others▫ Praise the child for calming

down after

2 Years• Less at odds with the

world than 18-month-olds• Speech and motor skills

have improved• Understands more• Able to wait longer for

various needs to be met• Express love and affection

freely

• Seeks approval and praise• Easier to reason with• Get along better with

parents and caregivers• More outgoing and

friendly• Less self-centered

2½ Year Olds• This period may seem

more difficult than the 18-month-old stage

• Learning so much that they become overwhelmed▫ Ability to understand

exceeds their physical ability to complete tasks

▫ EX: A child wants to stack blocks high but might accidentally knock them down prior to finishing the structure

• Struggle with immaturity and need for independence

• Sensitive about being bossed, shown, helped, or directed

• Stubborn, dominant, and demanding

• Moods change rapidly• Need for consistency

▫ Routines• Feel both independent and

dependent• Need flexible limits rather

than hard rules

3 Years Old• Happier than 2-1/2 year

olds• Physically more capable

▫ Less frustrated• More willing to take

directions• Modify their behavior for

praise and affection• Few temper tantrums• Love to talk

▫ Often will tell caregivers about their entire day

▫ Talks to toys, playmates, and imaginary friends

3½ Year Olds• Self-confident as a 3 year

old but becomes very insecure at 3-1/2

• Fears are common at this age▫ Afraid of the dark▫ Imaginary monsters▫ Strangers▫ Loud Noises

• Emotional tension and insecurity shows in physical ways to self-sooth▫ Sucking thumbs▫ Biting nails

• Try to show security by controlling their environment

• May issue demands▫ “I want to sit on the floor

and eat lunch”▫ “Talk to me!”

Specific Emotions-Anger• Normal emotion• A child’s way of reacting to frustration

▫ Changes over the years▫ Not as violent

• Target of a child’s anger changes in these years as well▫ 18-month-old does not direct anger at an

object or person▫ 2-3 year olds will hold a person or object

responsible for their frustration• Toddlers can become aggressive• Use these tips

▫ Use words▫ Speak calmly▫ Take deep breaths▫ Have angry child rest for a while

• Angry outbursts are more frequent in insecure and anxious children

Specific Emotions-Fear• Children will have specific fears

at different times• Some fears are useful in keeping

children away from dangerous situations

• Other fears must be overcome in order to develop healthy▫ Phobias are unexplainable and

illogical fears Fear of heights or public

speaking Develop in children that are shy

and withdrawn▫ Adults can pass phobias down

• Separation anxiety is the fear of being away from a parent, familiar caregivers, or the normal environment

• Tips to deal with fear:▫ Offer support and

understanding▫ Encourage children to

talk about their fears▫ Sometimes its best to

accept the fear and avoid trying to force the child to confront it

▫ Read books about children having fears

▫ Make unfamiliar situations more secure

▫ Teach the child how to control frightening situations

Specific Emotions-Jealousy• Emotion that usually crops up

during the child’s 2nd year• Reaches its peak around age 3

▫ A child may show resentment of affection between parents because the child cannot understand that parents have love that can go all around

• Sibling rivalry is the competition between brothers and sisters for parent’s affection and attention▫ Some become jealous when a

new baby is born▫ May revert to old ways or act

out

• Tips for dealing with sibling rivalry▫ Make sure each child feels

love and appreciation▫ Set aside one-on-one time

with each child▫ Avoid making comments

that compare children▫ Let the children take turns

in choosing activities▫ Make it clear that you will

not accept one child tattling to get another one in trouble

▫ Talk to children about their feelings of jealousy

Specific Emotions- Love, Affection, and Empathy• Love and affection feelings

are expressed more clearly during this stage

• Empathy is the ability to understand how another person feels▫ Usually develops between

12 and 18 months▫ A child may talk to

another child that is unhappy

▫ If a child does something to hurt another child, talk to the child by taking an active approach

Emotional Adjustment• Children’s emotional development needs to be

assessed to make sure they are on the right track. But how?▫Signs that a child has a healthy relationship

between his or her parents Seeks approval or praise Turns to parents and caregivers for comfort and help Tells caregivers about significant events so they can

share their joy and sorrow Accepts limits and discipline without too much

resistance▫Also look at a child’s relationship with siblings

Promote Positive Self-Concept• Self-concept is how people see themselves

▫Different from self-esteem; self-esteem is how highly you value yourself

• Children form self-concept in response to the actions, attitudes, and comments of others

• Young children believe what others say about them

• To build positive self-concept▫Do not talk negatively to children (EX: telling them

they are bad)▫Mastery of skills

Give toddlers many chances to explore their world

Discourage Negative Behavior• Some parents worry that correcting a child’s

behavior will negatively affect their self-concept. WRONG.

• By teaching and praising young children for appropriate behaviors, self-concept is enhanced

• Effective ways to discourage negative behavior:▫Explore feelings

Read stories to a child or watch children’s videos together▫Acknowledge feelings

When a playmate takes a toy, hitting or grabbing is a natural response

Offer alternative explanations to deter negative behavior▫Give Choices

Sleep and Emotional Behavior• Sleep disturbances are

normal for this age group▫ Some have trouble falling

asleep or staying asleep• Fears are a frequent cause

of sleep problems▫ Bedtime routines and a

reminder that a parent is close by

Importance of SleepAdequate Sleep Sleep Cycles

• Sleep is essential to good physical and emotional health

• Sleep deprived means lacking adequate sleep▫ Affects a child’s

temperament▫ Ability to complete

simple tasks▫ Less alert, inattentive,

and even hyperactive• 12-14 hours of sleep

• REM sleep is a sleep cycle characterized by rapid eye movement▫ Light sleep during which

dreams occur• NREM sleep is a cycle of sleep in

which rapid eye movement does not occur▫ Deep sleep

• Children are more likely to wake during REM sleep

• Newborns have a short sleep cycle and can go through an entire cycle of REM and NREM in about an hour

Prevent Sleep Deprivation• Determine a child’s best

bedtime• Limit toys in the bed• Establish a bedtime

routine• Keep bedtime pleasant

Chapter 11.2

Social Development from 1-3

General Social Patterns• Socialization is the

process of learning to get along with others▫ Skills stay with them

throughout their lives• Individual differences may

influence when, and in what order social skills are learned

18 Months• Some independence from

family• Closest relationships

continue to be those with their families

• Toddlers need to learn about the outside world▫ Other opportunities with

children• Do not really interact with

one another much▫ Parallel Play is when

children play near but not actually with each other

• Seem to treat other people more as objects than humans

• Satisfying strong desires without regard with those that may interfere▫ Conflicts over toys that

result in screaming, hitting, biting, or hair pulling

• Can understand that their actions have consequences

2 Years• Especially good at

understanding and interacting with main caregivers

• Can read caregivers moods

• Able to communicate well with others

• Fun playing with someone else

• Engage in parallel play▫ Idea of sharing and

taking turns• Like to please other

people

2 ½ Year Olds• Negativism carries over to

social development▫ May refuse to do

something for one person but will do that task for another

• Begin to learn about the rights of others

• Social play is still parallel and works best with only two children

• Frequent but quick fights during play

3 Years Old• Will share, help, or do

things another person’s way just to please them

• Cooperative Play is a type of play in which children play and interact with one another

• Work together in small groups

• Caregivers are still important but are no longer all-powerful in children’s social lives

3 ½ Year Olds• Children’s play becomes

more complex and includes more conversation▫ Disagreements with

playmates occur less often• Use several different

strategies to resolve conflicts• Increased ability to evaluate

friendships▫ “I don’t like Abby to come

here. She doesn’t play nice”• Take more notice of what

others are like▫ Start to compare themselves

with other children

Social Developmental Milestones Age Developmental Milestone

1 Year Plays alone but near others, dislikes sharing, desires approval, fears some strangers

2 Years Engages in parallel play, plays simple games with others, bosses other children, says “Please” if prompted

3 Years Engages in some cooperative play, takes turns, likes to help, shows affection

Making Friends• Important and normal to social development• A child who is comfortable with others and usually

develop normally▫ If a child is unable or unwilling to make friends, its

important to look closer and discover the cause and take steps to help

• Need contact with other people▫This is how they learn to socialize

• When young children spend most of their time with adults, they don’t learn how to connect to children their age▫Need to learn the rough-and-tumble friendship of other

children

Social Skills• Establish a basic set of rules to guide social behavior

▫ “No throwing toys” or “Don’t hit people”• Model good social skills• Help children understand and respect others’ feelings

▫ Show a child pictures of different expressions and ask the child to guess how they are feeling

• Show respect for other people’s belongings▫ “We shouldn’t touch grandma’s vase. If it breaks she

would be sad”• Show children how to use words rather than physically

striking out• Help children learn specific social skills

▫ How to share toys or taking turns

Imaginary Friends

•Perfectly normal•Can last for several months starting at 2

years until 3 or 4 years of age•Can be in human or animal or fantasy

form•Helps children experiment with different

feelings•For other, the imaginary friend mirrors

what the child does•Typically will fade away

Guiding Behavior• Guidance means using

firmness and understanding to help children learn self-discipline▫ Self-discipline is the

ability of children to control their own behavior

• Helps children learn how to get along with each other and to handle their own feelings

• Helps aid in moral development

• Approaches:▫ Consider the unique

personality, child’s age, stage of development, and ability to understand

▫ Consistency▫ Clear rules and apply

them to all situations

1 year to 15 Months• Distracting children and

physically removing them from forbidden activities or places is best for this age▫ Cannot understand adult

reasoning

15 Months to 2 Years• Require spoken

restrictions as well as a distraction▫ “lets take our cars to the

backyard. The driveway is not a safe place to play”

• A child may have to be reminded of the restriction a few times but will eventually understand

2 to 3 Years2 Years 3 Years

• Usually able to understand spoken commands and simple explanations

• Grasp reasoning of adults▫ “Kerri, you need to get

dressed now because Grandma will be here soon. Do you need help?”

• Accept reasonable, loving guidance more readily than children of other ages

• Like to please• Will remind a parent when

they are being good▫ “Look, I put on my rain

boots today because its raining. See my clean shoes? I’m a good boy, right?”

Set Limits• Helps a child learn self-regulation and self-discipline• State limits clearly

▫ Telling Kyle he may have a small snack does not set a clear limit

• Setting limits includes 4 steps▫ Show an understanding of the child’s desire

“I know you think it is fun to draw on the wall”▫ Set the limit and explain it

“But you may not draw on the wall because it’s hard to clean”▫ Acknowledge the child’s feelings

“I know you like drawing on the walls but walls are not for drawing”

▫ Give alternatives “If you want to draw, you may draw on this paper Or you can

play with your blocks.”

Encourage Independence• Autonomy means independence• Have realistic expectations

▫When a child is learning to self-feed; use unbreakable dishes

▫When learning how to dress, choose clothes that are easy to put on and take off

▫Using their own towel, washcloth, or toothbrush Step stools in the bathroom

• Start with simple household tasks▫Putting away toys, simple chores (sorting and folding

laundry)• Be patient and encourage, never forcing a child to do

something

Promote Sharing• Helpful tips:

▫Engage children in activities that require them to share

▫Place them in situations where they must take turns▫Limit the materials available for an activity so that a

child has to share▫Have children take turns handing out snacks or other

classroom duties▫Make clear what behavior you are trying to encourage▫Recognize and praise a child for sharing

• Sharing is not an equal experience for all children▫Having an attachment to a stuffed animal

Dealing with Aggressive Behavior•Behavior is a form of communication

▫Inappropriate behavior shows that a child is upset or that some need is not being met

Biting• Children bite for different

reasons▫ Infants don’t see the

difference between chewing on a toy or a sibling

▫ 1 year olds may bite to discover what happens

▫ 2 and 3 year olds may bite to get their way Angry or frustrated

• Determine what is causing the biting▫ Teething baby?

Hitting, Kicking, and Shoving• 2 and 3 year olds have

trouble controlling these impulses or aggressive reactions to emotions▫ The part of the brain that

controls these emotions is not yet developed

• REMINDER: Children are self-centered so when they do not get their way they become angry or frustrated

To Time-Out or not to Time-Out?• Child development experts

believe that time-outs are an effective way to help children understand what behaviors are not acceptable

• Time-outs are when a child is removed from the group and required to spend that time in a special area▫ Can also be given if a

toddler is upset and its now time to cool off