Charity&ChildrenAnd now abides faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity. Baptist Children’s Homes of North Carolina

Make your year-end gift by December 31. Double your gift through the Challenge Gift Appeal. (page 5)

1/15_________________ 128/1_________________

Brothers and sisters can argue and fuss at the drop of a hat. But when things are

up in the air and times get tough, siblings standtogether through thick and thin. Currently, Baptist Children’s Homes (BCH) has 24 siblinggroups in children’s residential care throughoutthe state.

“We know that keeping siblings together is important,” BCH president/CEO Michael C.Blackwell says. “Throughout BCH’s history, wehave made this a home that welcomes brothersand sisters.”

The large number of sibling groups is attrib-

uted to the growing partnership between BCH and the North Carolina Division of SocialServices (DSS). DSS has been successfully utiliz-ing a foster care home network to meet the needsof many traumatized children. But the growingnumber of sibling groups and the agency’s desire to keepbrothers and sisters togetherhas prompted them to turnto BCH.

“What is happening nowcomes from a revitalized partnership with DSS,” BCH’s director of childresidential services Linda Morgan says. “We areproviding a viable place for siblings. We valuethese groups and are working hard to maintainthe integrity of the sibling unit by providing a successful home experience.”

It is traumatic for children when they are removed from their home. It can be even more

traumatic when siblings are separated. Keeping them together helps make the transitionsmoother. Siblings acclimate to cottage life betterwhen their brother or sister is nearby, and BCHworks to accommodate the groups. If there are

just brothers or just sisters, they can beplaced in the same cottage. If there are brothers and sisters and placed inseparate cottages, BCH makes sure they have time together.

More and more sibling groups with younger children are coming into care.

In the west, there are a one- and a two-year-old.At Mills Home in Thomasville, one sibling groupof four brothers will have the two youngestbrothers attending day care.

“It appears that things happening in homes arebecoming even more severe,” Morgan says. “Inthe past, younger children were left with one or (Continued on page 8.)

Currently, there are 24 sibling groups in Baptist Children’s Homes care around the state. BCH is committed to providing a place for sibling brothers and sisters to remain together when they are displaced from their homes.At BCH, siblings

stay together___________________________________________________

By Jim Edminson, Editor

C A R ECARE and

see lives changedforever.

____________________________________________________________________

2 1/15 – Charity + Children – 128/1

Charity & Children – Baptist Children’s Homes of North Carolina, Inc., 204 Idol St., P.O. Box 338, Thomasville, NC 27361-0338. Michael C. Blackwell, publisher; Jim Edminson, editor (wjedminson@bchfamily.org); J. Blake Ragsdale, managing editor (jbragsdale@ bchfamily.org); Marcia Housand, Account Clerk. Charity & Children (ISSN 0009-1723-09 USPS 100-460) is published 11 times a year forfriends and supporters of Baptist Children’s Homes and is printed at Triangle Web Printing, Durham, NC. It is mailed by Excalibur, Winston-Salem, NC. Circulation: 62,000 seven times a year, 30,000 four times a year. Periodicals postage paid at Thomasville, NC, and at addition-al mailing offices. For free subscription, or to be removed from the mailing list or make address correction or change, use the aboveaddress and write to Attn: Circulation Manager, send an email to address@bchfamily.org or call at 336-474-1209. Subscribe online atwww.bchfamily.org/contact/index/charityandchildren. POSTMASTER: Send change of address to Charity & Children, P.O. Box 338,Thomasville, NC 27361-0338.

Sharing Hope...Changing Lives Campaign at www.bchfamily.org/campaign

Astudy several years ago showed that peoplemake more than 300 decisions every minute

they drive a car in city traffic. Speed up, slowdown, signal, change lanes, check the mirror,check your gauges, watch your left, keep your eye on the kid with soccer ball, watch the cyclist,answer the phone, constantly monitoring drivingconditions to arrive safely and on time.

The man or woman who drives to the top of the corporate heap is the one who demonstrates a strong ability to make right decisions. Thetougher the decisions and the more money thatrides on the executive’s word, the more he is compensated and the more she is exposed to second guessing and vulnerability.

But we expect that of adults. Somebody has to make the world go round and that lot falls on the shoulders of those who have seen more revolutions than young people.

But young people in care at Baptist Children’sHomes (BCH) often have to make decisions thatare so big, so momentous, they would immobilizeadults with spasms of fear.

Consider these two from early in my presidency:Elizabeth, who was our pride and joy at Mills

Home in Thomasville, came to us when her fatherdied and her alcoholic mother could no longer care for her. Elizabeth exhibited all the problems of a child raised in that environment, but she also displayed an enormous potential. She wassmart, attractive and showed a spunky resilience.Elizabeth did well in school. She was popular,scored well in her classes, found an excellent part-time job with Thomasville Furniture Industries.She was on a roll.

Then one day her mother called. She was sick. Would Elizabeth please come home and live with her?

Elizabeth loved her mother. She cringed dailythinking of the life wasted by alcohol and the relationship she could have shared if mother hadcontrolled her desire for liquor. Her mother wassick. She needed Elizabeth and was asking her to

come home.But Elizabeth,

by now a high school senior, planning for college,had to consider her own future. She knew if she re-turned home, she would be nursemaid to a mothershe loved but who could only drag her into thehopeless abyss in which she dwelled, dashing herdreams, like her mother’s drinks, “on the rocks.”

At BCH, Elizabeth could maintain her owndreams, her own hopes of ending the cycle of broken homes and shattered lives.

Tough decision for a teen-ager. Tell my motherto take care of herself and live my own life. Or giveup my own dreams to care for a mother I love.Elizabeth was not alone.

There’s Joe. Joe was a camper at our CameronBoys Camp, one of the most innovative and vitalprograms in the country for boys having thetoughest time with life. Joe’s mother separatedfrom Joe’s father. She could not handle Joe athome and his father was being a bad influence on the boy.

Joe was one of 10 children. When the father became mentally unstable and started being violentat home, mother forced him out of the house. Shestruggled with all the children. Once when drivingdown the road, she warned the little ones to lockthe car door and be careful not to push on it. Thenshe heard the door unlock, looked in the mirrorand saw Joe whispering to his brother and lookinglike he was about to push him out of the movingcar’s door.

Joe did great at school. His teachers didn’t understand how he could appear to be such a problem at home. Apparently the harsh homelife, the violence and fear at home split his person-ality. He could not function with the adults in his life, but at school where the awful problems of domestic violence did not rear their ugly heads,he could handle life.

Joe had to decide whether or not to go toCameron Boys Camp, some 900 acres of wilder-ness in Moore County. Now consider this. Boys at Cameron live year round in shelters they design

and build them-selves. They don’t move into

an air-conditioned bunkhousewhen the temperature hits 90 – or 100. They don’tmove in by the pot-bellied stove when it dips to40 – or 20. They’re under the constantly-lovingbut ever-watchful eye of Christian counselors nightand day. No shenanigans. When they have a prob-lem with others in their group, the group stops itsactivity until the boys face the problem and solve it in a non-violent way.

There’s no dad to share a soda with. No motherto manipulate. No TV to pass idle hours. There is,however, the challenge of hard work, self-reliance,learning wilderness skills, and discovering howdeep your backbone really grows.

But boys don’t come to Cameron Camp unlessthey agree to. Joe was just 12. Did you ever haveto make a decision like that when you were 12? Or 18? Or 25?

Did you ever have to decide to tell your sickmother you couldn’t take care of her because youhave your own dreams. Did you ever have to decidewhether to give up the comforts of home and schoolfor the challenge of the wilderness?

Many of the hundreds of children Baptist Children’s Homes serves each year have to makethese kinds of decisions. Elizabeth decided to stay.She graduated and is working. Joe decided to goto Cameron. After a year and a half, Joe left campto go back home. I was there as he bade farewell to his friends and counselors. His challenge athome was just as awesome as it was at camp.

Baptist Children’s Homes always works withcustodians and children alike to restore relation-ships. We’re helping them reach decisions that willaffect them positively for the rest of their lives.

That’s what “sharing hope…changing lives” is all about.

Michael C. Blackwell leads the ministry with vigorand enthusiasm. He has served as president ofBaptist Children’s Homes since 1983 and has arecord-setting 31-year tenure.

[ MY THOUGHTS }

Children tackle toughquestions to succeed_________________________________________________________________________

By Michael C. Blackwell, President/CEO

Jazmine giggles as she whizzes around theYork Cottage living room. Pat and Harold Clapp smile as they sit and watch the four-

year-old play. With a sudden bounce, Jazmineleaps into Pat’s lap. She wraps her tiny armsaround her giving a big hug.

“You two have done so much for us,”Jazmine’s mother Lisa says as she watches the retired couple play with her daughter.

As volunteers at Mills Home in Thomasville,the Clapps have become close to Jazmine, Lisaand many of the single mothers and childrenfrom Baptist Children’s Homes’ (BCH) FamilyCare program.

Seeing the lives of BCH’s residents changedthrough the ministry, and receiving hugs fromchildren like Jazmine, is what makes volunteeringa passion for the couple.

The Clapps first learned about BCH as ayoung couple and spent time with children fromMills Home when attending First Baptist Churchin Archdale.

Today, Pat and Harold are members of Green Street Baptist Church in High Point. A few years ago, Harold selected Mills Home for their Sunday School class to support.

Harold remembersbeing amazed by theinteractions betweenclass members andresidents from Black-well Cottage duringa group lunch.

“One of our sen-iors had recently losthis spouse, and I re-member Angela fromBlackwell Cottagesitting and talkingwith him,” Haroldrecounts. “Hechanged after she spoke with him. He had his smile back.”

“These girls didn’t know what our class members were going through, but the Lorddid,” Pat shares. “He sent them to help.”

In 2012, Pat felt God leading her to helpBCH in a volunteer role. It resulted in a life-changing decision.

“I let work know that I was leaving my job to go to BCH,” Pat recalls. “I had worked at my job for 37 years and thought I’d retire whenI reached 50 years. But the Lord told me to retire early and volunteer at BCH.”

Incredibly, Pat left her job before ever dis-cussing volunteer opportunities with BCH. Unknown to Pat, while she was working out the

details of her early retirement, BCH’s executiveBrenda Gray was saying a special prayer.

“We were short-staffed in the developmentand communications department and did nothave the budget to hire someone,” Gray recalls.“I was praying that God would send us a volun-teer, someone servant-minded who was giftedwith office management skills.”

Just days later, the Clapps approached Grayand the department’s of-fice manager Alan Williamsabout volunteering. Theyconnected Pat and Haroldwith Family Care.

“We didn’t know any-thing about Family Carewhen we first began, butHarold and I used to befoster parents to four sib-lings,” Pat explains. “Wealways believed in keepingchildren together.”

Family Care is BCH’sprogram that helps hard-working, single mothersrebuild their lives while caring for their children.

Through the Clapps’ connection with the pro-gram, their church has helped some of the moth-ers who have completed the program through itsfurniture ministry. The church was able to pro-vide furnishings as they moved into their homes.

“One of the mothers we became close tocalled me at home when she was studying for her Certified Nurses Assistant certification,” Patshares. “She was so nervous. I encouraged her todepend on the Lord for help. Later she called tolet me know she had passed.”

In addition to Family Care, Pat and Haroldbegan assisting Gray and Williams in their office.

“They have been a Godsend,” Gray says. “Pat

and Harold help in so many ways. They areamong the most generous people you will find.”

It is rare if a day goes by when Pat and Haroldare not on the Mills Home campus helping insome way. Harold often pulls into the BlackwellCottage driveway with a box of doughnuts.

“The kids call me ‘Mr. Doughnut,’” Haroldchuckles.

“I’ve volunteered other places, but it’s differ-ent when God calls you to do something,” Patsays. “I look back at things I’ve experienced inmy life, especially as a foster parent, and see howthose pieces of my life were all in place to prepareme for doing this.”

Pat and Harold Clapp began volunteering in 2013. The retired couple invests their time, often daily, at Mills Home. Pat left her employer of 37 years because she felt God leading her to volunteer at BCH. Above, the Clapps assist at the Devel-

opment and Communications department. Below, The couple play with Family Care residents Aaron and Jazmine.

[ BCH VOLUNTEERS}

Couple showslove by serving___________________________________________________

By J. Blake Ragsdale, Managing Editor

More stories at www.bchfamily.org/stories____________________________________________________________________

1/15 – Charity + Children – 128/1 3

A caring couple has made a challengegift offering to match the first $1 million

pledged to BCH’s campaign through a plannedgift. Let us know about your planned gift

today and we can double it!

BCH’s capital campaign provides help now and for the future through

renovating the minsitry’s statewidecare locations, raising daily operating

funds, and building the endowment.

Learn how you can be a part of the campaign bycarefully increasing your giving through a five-yearpledge or outright gift. Contact Brenda Gray at

336.689-4442 / bbgray@bchfamily.org

January not only marks the beginning of a newyear, it is a perfect time to reflect on the old. As I think back on the past year, I am reminded

of the many blessings God bestowed on all of us atBaptist Children’s Homes (BCH). We have beenblessed with volunteers that helped with numer-ous renovation projects that saved thousands ofdollars. We have been blessed with donations offood, clothing and furniture. We have beenblessed with the financial support to meet theneeds of those individuals God has entrusted intoBCH’s care. And we have been generously blessedby your remembering this ministry as you prayed.

And we are so very grateful.I also enjoyed the opportunity last year to visit

with many of you. I’ve heard wonderful stories of how you have been blessed and how you haveblessed others. My heart was touched and encour-aged as you – our dear friends – shared your joy of giving.

This year Baptist Children’s Homes will cele-brate its 130th anniversary. One hundred andthirty years of providing a safe home where hopeand love are unconditionally and generously offered every day. Hundreds upon hundreds ofpeople have left their imprint through their loveand support. Together, we create a wonderfullegacy that makes a difference in a child’s life.

In addition to being the month that marks the new year, it is also “Make Your Will Month.”Planned gifts represent the long-term assurancethat BCH will always be able to keep its commit-ment to care for those in need.

Each child’s life is a precious gift and through-out these 130 years, BCH has helped thousands of children. The children we helped yesterday havebecome the adults who share hope and strengthen

our world today. The children we helptoday will become the adults who willoffer hope andstrengthen ourworld tomorrow.With your estategift, the childrenwe help tomorrowwill continue thisgreat legacy of shar-ing hope. . .changinglives.

I invite you to become a part of the continuinglegacy by becoming an I.G. Greer Society mem-ber. BCH’s I.G. Greer Society was created tohonor persons who have included BCH in theirestate plans. As a part of our Sharing Hope…Changing Lives Capital Campaign, a caring couple has made a challenge gift offering to matchthe first $1 million pledged to BCH’s Campaignthrough planned giving – imagine doubling yourgift. Let us know of your plans to include BCH inyour planned giving and we can double your gift.

There are many ways you can help BCHthrough you Will – all of them offer advantages to you, your family and BCH. Your peace of mindand the future needs of your family can be pro-tected and the future of the ministries importantto you can be continued.

Ask your attorney to explain in detail yourmany options as you prepare or update your Will.Here are a few ways to include BCH in your Will. – Denote a specific amount to be given to BCH. – Specify a percentage of assets to come to BCH. – Indicate the residue of the assets to come to BCH.

– Name BCH as the contingentbeneficiary.

You may alsoconsider other

planned giv-ing op-

tionssuch

as a gift annuity,

trust, insur-ance, and utiliz-

ing retirement plan assets. I am so grateful for the generosity and thought-

fulness of people who have chosen to leave a legacy – to make a difference – and impact thehopelessness experienced by children yesterday,today and tomorrow. For more information onhow you can impact the “least of these” throughyour legacy gift, call me at 336-474-1230.

Please note that we combine the January/February issues of Charity & Children and youwill not receive a paper in February. So, I’m takingthis opportunity to personally challenge you to be bold this February! Celebrate by sharing lovewith others by doing at least one act of kindnesseach of the 28 days of the month. Email me andlet me know how you encouraged others throughyour many acts of kindness. Can’t wait to hearabout the creative ways you offered hope to others. Email your acts of kindness to bbgray@

bchfamily.org.

Brenda Gray’s passion is children. She serves BCH as the executive vice president, development & communications. Gray directs all fund-raising/friend-raising activities for the state-wide services.

Leave a legacy. Vist www.bchfamily.org/plannedgiving

[ WORTHWHILE INVESTMENTS }

Grateful for blessings –Leave a legacy of hope__________________________________________________________________________________________

By Brenda B. Gray, Executive Vice President, Development & Communications

____________________

28 Days of KindnessCelebrate February by sharing

at least one act of kindness eachof the 28 days of

the month.

Let us know how you encouraged others through your acts of kindness. Email bbgray@bchfamily.org

Planned giving changes children’s lives!Please return this coupon to let us know if you have already included Baptist Children’sHomes in your will as an I.G. Greer Society member or if you would like moreinformation about estate planning. Call Brenda Gray at 336-474-1230.

Name _______________________________________________________________________________

Address _____________________________________________________________________________

Phone____________________________ Email ________________________________________

Contact me with information on how to prepare a Christian will. I have included Baptist Children’s Homes in my estate plans.Mail: Baptist Children’s Homes / P.O. Box 338 / Thomasville, NC 27361

____________________________________________________________________

4 1/15 – Charity + Children – 128/1

To give immediately, visit www.bchfamily.org/givenow____________________________________________________________________

1/15 – Charity + Children – 128/1 5

[ C H A L L E N G E G I F T A P P E A L }

$50 $100 $250 $500 $ ______________ Any size gift!

I want to help – please double my gift ! URGENT!

RUSH MYGIFT!

Name ________________________________________________________ Address _______________________________________________________________________________________

City ___________________________ State ______ Zip __________ Phone __________________________________________ Email ______________________________________________

Credit Card Option: Visa MC Name on card: ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Card #: ___ ___ ___ ___ - ___ ___ ___ ___ - ___ ___ ___ ___ - ___ ___ ___ ___ Signature: _____________________________________________________________________________________________

Must have Credit Card Expiration Date: ____________ Contact me with information on how to prepare a Christian Will.

Three-digit security code (on card back): ___ ___ ___ I have included Baptist Children’s Homes in my estate plans.

Mail to: BCHP.O. Box 338Thomasville, NC 27361

Imagine...Give Today, Double Your Gift!

Through the matching gift challenge, your investmentin children’s lives is multiplied by two. Imagine howmany more boys and girls you can helpby giving today.

Your investment in the lives of BCH’sboys and girls will be matcheddollar for dollar up to the$250,000 challenge total.

A $100 gift becomes $200.A $500 contribution becomes $1,000.The opportunityto double your giftends January 31, 2015!

Please give!You can give online at www.bchfamily.org/givenow

Essence, age 4

Baptist Children’s Homes (BCH) experi-enced a rough start to 2014 when a de-

structive ice storm felled trees and causedthousands of dollars in damage to the MillsHome campus in Thomasville. Despite the dam-age, BCH rallied from the storm’s aftermath andits bleak beginning to the year. In fact, the 129-year-old ministry went on to celebrate a numberof milestones which made 2014 one of the mostmemorable years in recent history.

________________________________Kennedy Home celebratesits centennial – BCH’s second-oldest campus marked its 100th an-niversary on July 5 – 6, 2014.

Kennedy Home in Kinston first opened on June 15, 1914. TheCentennial Celebration was attended by residents and stafffrom both the past and the present as well as BCH trustees,community friends and dignitaries. Dubbed the “Star of theEast” by BCH president Michael C. Blackwell, the KennedyHome grounds overflowed with activity throughout a com-memorative weekend of live music, free food, family gamesand worship. The event’s emotional highlight occurred dur-ing Sunday’s worship service when Blackwell delivered a dra-matic 15-minute monologue in the persona and periodclothing of Kennedy Home benefactor Captain WilliamLafayetteKennedy.

_________________________________Guatemala orphanage

accepts first child – The Good Shepherd Children’sHome, BCH’s affiliate orphanage in Xela, Guatemala, re-ceived its operating license on October 7, 2014. Just ten dayslater, Enma Carolina, a four-month-old girl who had been

abandoned, became the orphanage’s first child. By mid-No-vember, six children, including three babies and three youngsiblings, were in care. The home provides a safe haven for in-digenous boys and girls suffering from hunger, abandonmentand a myriadof otherneeds. GoodShepherd isBCH’s firstongoing in-ternationaleffort.

__________________________________BCH launches capital campaign – In June 2014, BCH

launched Sharing Hope…Changing Lives, a multi-milliondollar capital campaign that will meet a variety of immedi-ate needs while strengthening the nonprofit’s foundation forthe future. The financial goal for the campaign is$21,300,000. The campaign will impact all of BCH’s loca-tions in 19 North Carolina communities and is focused onraising support for renovations, ongoing operational support,and building the nonprofit’s endowment.

_______________________________Children and residentsRise Up for inspirationalpresentation – On November

10, 2014, Blackwell led more than 200 BCH residents andstaff for a 25-minute presentation at the Baptist State Con-vention of North Carolina’s Annual Meeting in Greensboro.Entitled Rise Up, the emotional presentation featured multi-ple residents sharing, through stories and songs, how BCHhas helped them overcome the trauma of abuse, destitutionand family dysfunction. The audience applauded and cameto their feet when Sedrick, a special needs resident fromBCH’s Developmental Disabilities Ministry, literally rose upfrom his wheelchair and stood with help from his caregivers.Sedrick lost his ability to walk because of severe child abuse.Today, the 28-year-old is walking as much as 250 feet withassistance.

________________________________NCBAM marks five years –The North Carolina Baptist Aging Ministry (NCBAM), BCH’s

statewide program that serves the needs of frail agingadults, marked its fifth anniversary in November 2014.NCBAM’s state-of-the-art Call Center fields more than 350calls per month requesting help. There are 15,000 volunteersand service providers who stand ready to meet those needs.NCBAM has connected more than 2,000 aging adults to volunteers who have built them wheelchair ramps, has mobilized 1,243 Baptist volunteers to install free smokealarm detectors, and has distributed more than 16,000

prescrip-tion man-agementRed Bags.

_________________________________________________________6. Children reach goals – Two of BCH’s children, Kimanifrom Broyhill Home in Clyde and Paulina from Mills Home inThomasville, celebrated educational milestones. Kimani,who never attended school before coming to BCH at age 12,graduated high school on June 11. He is taking communitycollege courses while still living at Broyhill Home. Paulinagraduated summa cum laude from the University of NorthCarolina at Greensboro on May 9. She received a bachelor ofsocial work degree and is working towards a master of socialwork degree at the University of NC in Chapel Hill.

________________________________________________________

More stories at www.bchfamily.org/stories____________________________________________________________________

6 1/15 – Charity + Children – 128/1

[ 2014 IN REVIEW }

Highlights include historic happenings –One baby and 100th celebration take top spots_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

________________________________Friends tackle ice storm damage – Community friends in-cluding businesses, churches and in-dividuals rallied to help Mills Home

recover from an ice storm that struck on March 7. Volun-teers removed fallen limbs and trees. Food Lion contributed$3,000 in grocery gift cards to help replenish food suppliesspoiled bythe campus-wide poweroutage. Peo-ple donatedfunding on-line, andeven walkedin off thestreet, to aidthe recoveryprocess.

__________________________________________________________

Truett Home serves Lilly – When Cherokee CountyDepartment of Social Services needed a home for a para-lyzed girl, BCH’s Truett Home in Hayesville made extraordi-nary considerations to care for eight-year-old Lilly. BCHdoes not normally provide specialized medical care for chil-dren, but everyone from BCH’s leadership to caregivers feltstrongly that Lilly needed to be at Truett Home until a long-term placement could be selected. Where Lilly had all butlost any connection to children her age, she was able to be

with a cottage full of girls at Truett.Incredibly, during the short time shewas in care, Lilly asked Christ into herheart. Today, Lilly is doing well and isliving in a caring facility where herneeds are met._____________________________________

Sherri cares for childrenwhile battling cancer –BCH’s Family Care programprovided Sherri and her chil-dren a home where they could

be together. The single mother and her familywent from living in a shelter to BCH’s FamilyCare residential program at Oak Ranch. Therein Broadway, this remarkable mother battledcancer and returned to school while caring forher children through Family Care’s support.The program offers hard-working singlemothers the opportunity to rebuild their liveswhile providing for their families.

_____________________BCH launches newwebsite – The newwww.bchfamily.org was launched early this

year. It is BCH’s most comprehensivewebsite to date encompassing all as-pects of BCH’s ministry throughoutNorth Carolina and The Good Shepherd Children’s Home inGuatemala. There is information on each BCH location aswell as pages for all of the ministry’s major events. For thefirst time, visitors can read archived issues of Charity &Children online. The online donation page (www. bchfam-ily.org/givenow) has been completely revamped and donorsare now able to designate their gifts. The online donationpage is also mobile friendly.

Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/bchfamily____________________________________________________________________

1/15 – Charity + Children – 128/1 7

2015 CalendarApril – Food Roundup:www.bchfamily.org/foodroundup

May 2 – Friends of Children Workday:Kennedy Home in Kinston Mills Home in ThomasvilleOak Ranch in Broadway

May 5 – Founders Day:Cameron Boys Camp in Cameron

May 9 – Friends of Children Workday:Camp Duncan in Aberdeen

May 9 – Barbecue Festival:Broyhill Home in Clyde

May 16– Friends of Children Workday:Odum Home in Pembroke

May 30 – HopeFest:Lee Regional Fairgrounds in Sanford

July 3 - 5 – Kennedy HomecomingKennedy Home in KinstonJuly 31 - Aug. 2 – Mills HomecomingMills Home in Thomasville

Aug. 8 – Hope in Style:Greensboro Country Club in Greensboro

Sept. 10 – Western Area Conference:Broyhill Home in Clyde

Sept. 12 – Friends of Children Workday:Cameron Boys Camp in CameronOak Ranch in BroadwayKennedy Home in Kinston

Sept. 19 – Friends of Children Workday:Camp Duncan in AberdeenOdum Home in Pembroke

Sept. 22 – Founders Day:Camp Duncan in Aberdeen

October 17 – UNITE Youth Event:Mills Home in Thomasville

Nov. TBA – Super Senior Fest:Mills Home in Thomasville

Nov. 15-22 – Week of Prayer: Your prayers mean so much!

For more information on how you or yourchurch can participate, call Alan Williamsat 1.800.476.3669, ext. 1277.

[ 28TH ANNUAL MILLS HOME TOY RUN}

Bikers roar onto campus for Christmas _______________________________________________________________________________________

Children at Mills Home stood in awe as hundreds of motorcy-

cles arrived at BCH’s Thomasvillecampus on Sunday, December 7. The 28th annual Randolph CountyConcerned Bikers Association ToyRun was among the largest ever. Motorcyclists kicked off the Christ-mas season by bringing gifts to all residents and raising more than$8,000 that will be used to fund special activities for the childrenthroughout the year. Approximately2,400 bikers riding 1,900 motorcy-cles participated in the ride ensuringresidents had an unforgetful day.

Help immediately by giving online at www.bchfamily.org/givenow

Your vehicle helps BCH! When you donate your vehicle, it becomes a vital part of our ministry. Vehicles are used to drive residents to school,doctor visits, church activities, and other events. Tax benefitsare available. Call BCH’s Office of Development at 1-800-476-3669,ext. 1209.

____________________________________________________________________

8 1/15 – Charity + Children – 128/1

Above left, children living in BCH’s Family Care cottages at Mills Home open their gifts. Residents submit wish lists which are given to the Randolph County Concerned Bikers Asso-ciation who distribute the lists among participating bikers. Above, Santa is the first to arrive.Below left, A caravan of approximately 1,900 traveled from Asheboro, where the ride begins,

to Thomasville. Below, Residents Spencer and Thomas admire the motorcycles.

With your help, we can feed BCH’s residents for a year!Your church or group can provide 700,000 meals and snacksby collecting non-perishable food. More information soon.

336.474.1277 or www.bchfamily.org/foodroundup

Free music and family fun benefitingCameron Boys Camp and CampDuncan. Includes BBQ cook-off,children’s games, gospel music,silent auction, and vendors.

Siblings (Continued from page 1.)

both parents when older children were removed, but today it is necessary to remove even the youngest child.”

BCH is committed to being available for a sibling placement at any time, day ornight, seven days a week. If a crisis arises ina home and DSS needs help with a siblinggroup, they can call on BCH.

BCH serves siblings through privateplacement as well. A private placementoriginates from a variety of sources –church members, school teachers, coun-selors and administration, and even familymembers.

“In my 41 years at BCH,” Morgan says,“I cannot remember serving as manygroups at one time. I can remember serving4 to 5 groups at Broyhill Home. But today,there are 14 sibling groups in the westernarea – one group is comprised of six sib-lings.”

Trends suggest that sibling group place-ments will be around for some time.Younger siblings displaced from their homeand a priority on brothers and sisters beingplaced together will continue to be theguiding force. While foster care meets theneeds of many children, BCH serves bykeeping family units together.

“We stand committed to serve siblings,”Blackwell asserts. “In years past, siblinggroups were successful living at BCH.Today, those brothers and sisters look backat their time growing up with fond memo-ries. My hope is that these groups we servenow will look back and have many goodmemories as well.”

Ihope the holidays have been won-derful. Please note that this issue

of C&C is for both January and February. Also, note this address cor-rection: Rev. Parker McLendon, Pied-mont Crossing, 214 Boyce SinkCourt, Thomasville, NC 27360.

Thanks to Arlie Stewart who sentword that he recently moved fromthe good old “almost north” state ofMaryland to the good old “warmstate” of Florida. His new address is:Arlie Stewart, 1833 Lakeview Blvd.,North Fort Myers, FL 33903. Hisphone number is still the same, 410-574-9169.

Arlie came to Mills Home (MH)in 1945 and left in 1953 – therebymissing the grand opportunity ofgraduating with the class of ‘57. Inrecent years, he was been very faithfulto return to Homecoming and bring-ing his lovely wife as well.

Please continue sending addresscorrections to: Sally Beck Ferguson,25 Southern Pine Trail, OrmondBeach, FL, 32174 or to fergu-sonsb@yahoo.com.

Recently the MH website, I askedDennis Webster for the dates he wasat MH. He replied and I learnedsome things about him. He enteredMH in the summer of 1958 and wasthere until he graduated in 1965.Having been an only child, he lovedliving on the MH campus with somany newly-acquired brothers andsisters. It was so amazing to him thathe had suddenly acquired clothes thathe felt, and looked, good in. He remembers having plenty of food toeat and that there was always some-one who cared about his well being.He felt he finally had some structure in his life – going to school, eatingregularly, sleeping regular hours, andreceiving love from strangers. It wasgreat!

All that was in sharp contrast to some unhappy years when he livedin a foster home where he did not receive care, comfort and sometimesnot even the basic necessities. Priorto that, he carried the responsibilityof looking after his own mother whileyet a very young boy. He feels he developed a heavy burden of feeling

inferior in those very early years andit took a lot of time to get over that.In his words, “building self-esteemwas a hard hill to climb!”

But he goes on to say “I guess I would compare going into MillsHome to dying and going to heaven!So much food (I had never hadenough before.), clothes – I finallylooked decent for a change, and I hada more structured life and plenty oflove even it it was from strangers. Yes,I thought it was great to be an or-phan! I’ve always been proud to say.‘I grew up at Mills Home,’ And Imust add that I thank God for DinahDove. She helped shape my adult lifeand create our wonderful family.”

Dave Stepp asked recently on Face-book for all to remember in prayerhimself, his brother Gene, andGene’s daughter Jennifer. Dave expects to be having surgery some-time in January. Jennifer has recentlybeen diagnosed with lung cancer andGene is not in the best of health.Dave strongly believes that God givesstrength through prayers. He saysthat his family is very close. Friendscan reach Dave at this address: P.O.Box 363, Yamhill, OR 97148.

Many of us learned through Face-book and the MH alumni websitethat Allen Carroll had a very damag-ing stroke before Homecoming. I learned from his brother Marion“Bunny” on Dec. 1 that Allen hasbeen out of the hospital and rehab forawhile and is improving daily. He isstill in therapy and trying to deal withthings that are still difficult for him.He can now walk and is better ableto talk. He and his wife Lisa are delighted that he has been able tomake trips to visit their daughter andgranddaughter in Nashville, TN. I’msure Allen’s family will appreciatecontinued prayers and get well cards.His address is: 4315 Hiawatha Dr.,Knoxville, TN, 37919.

Bunny is still living in Greensboroand enjoying good health. He enjoysthe fact that both his daughter andson live in the same city and he is ableto have frequent contact with themand his only grandchild Henry, a firstgrader. Many alumni know littleHenry through his visits to MH at

Homecoming and his attending theBill Byerly picnic in early October.

I talked with Grace Panther Willison Dec. 1 and found out that she isstaying busy serving in the UnitedWay “Grandparent Program” forkindergarten and first graders in thelittle town of Casar near Shelby. Sheenjoys helping the children copy theirassignments from the board andhelping them in other ways as well.She will soon complete her tenth yearserving in that program. She alsomentioned that she stays in touchwith members of the class of 1956 aswell as Eileen Williams, class of ‘53

Since Homecoming, Leonard Ko-rnegay has dealt with health issues related to cancer. He says that he isnow doing very well. If you wish tosend cards, his address is: 120 PointShore Dr., Goldsboro, NC, 27534.

Nancy Martinez Powell says thatClem Martinez Pridemore camethrough her surgery and is makingdaily progress in the healing process.The family appreciates the prayers onClem’s behalf. Folks can send getwell cards to Clem at this address:111 East Naomi St., Randleman,NC, 27317.

More about Diane Coates Dalrym-ple as promised last month. Thanksto Rick Smoot for the obituary ofDiane Coates Dalrymple who diedon Nov. 5 at Forsyth Medical Centerin Winston-Salem. A widow for several years, Diane was well knownto many generations of Mills Homealumni because she and her husbandlived in Thomasville, he worked atMills Home, and they were both atHomecoming year after year. Mostpeople seem to remember Diane as a very sweet and shy sort of person.She graduated from MH and THS in1974 and married her beloved Donthe same year. He was a Vietnam vet-eran and Thomasville Firefighter.Diane worked thirty-eight years withSummit and Time-Warner Cablecompanies.

Surviving Diane are her son Brianand his wife Nicole and their daugh-ter Avery of Thomasville, her daugh-ter Heather and fiancé Jon Myers ofThomasville, and Diane’s little dogCooper. Her memorial service was

held 7 p.m. Monday, November 10,at Rich Fork Baptist Church.

I was deeply saddened to hear that Frances Buckner Dula died onNovember 23 from complications ofcancer. Frances lived most of heradult years in Thomasville and hadmoved back to her hometown ofAsheville after she and her husbandBill Dula retired. She died at the Solace Center in Asheville.

Frances came to MH in 1946 withher sister Judy. She was very active in campus sports, church activities –especially choir – and in many clubsat Thomasville High School. She wason the Mills Home softball team andbasketball team, a member of thechoir, and an excellent student, grad-uating in 1955. I was lucky to haveher as a suitemate at the Little Cot-tage for two years and we becamevery good friends. After graduating,she attended Gardner-Webb JuniorCollege one year. She returned to Thomasville where she attendedAshmore Business College, marriedand settled down to work inThomasville and rear her family. She retired as Human ResourcesManager at North State Telephonecompany in High Point in 1999. Sheserved the community well by volun-teering with the American Red Cross,the YWCA Building Fund Commit-tee, the Thomasville City Schools,and as chairman of the ThomasvilleRecreation Committee.

Frances is survived by her husbandBill Dula, her sister Judy Freeney, twodaughters, two step-daughters andone step-son, four step-grand-chil-dren and one step-great grand-son.She was predeceased by her brotherRay. A memorial service was heldSaturday, November 29, 2014 at 2p.m. in J.C. Green & Sons Chapel.Her ashes were inurned at Holly Hill.Friends may send condolences to BillDula at: 41 Bideford Row, Asheville,NC, 28803 and to Judy BucknerFreeney at: 141 Covington Pl,

Macon GA, 31210.

Lib Johnson was a resident of MillsHome from 1946 to 1957. Johnsonbegan writing the Mills Home alumnicolumn in 1992.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/millshomealumni____________________________________________________________________

1/15 – Charity + Children – 128/1 9

[ MILLS HOME ALUMNI COLUMN }

Coming to Mills Home was “like dying andgoing to heaven!” – Remembering days gone by_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

By Lib Smathers Johnson (336) 299-7412 libsjohnson@triad.rr.com

____________________________________________________________________

10 1/15 – Charity + Children – 128/1 Discover ways you can help BCH at www.bchfamily.org/getinvolved

___________________________________________Mills Home

On Sunday, November 17, Baptist Children’sHomes president/CEO Michael C. Blackwellspoke at Long Shoals Baptist Church in Lincolnton. It is the home church of Craigand Kathy, the grandparents of Mills Homeresidents Jonathan and Thomas. Pastor Kenneth Gibson and the brothers’ grand-parents worked together to help the boys come to Mills Home where they now live.

“Not only was it incredibly special tospeak at such a supportive church, but to bethere with the family of these two remark-able boys we serve was an indescribablehonor,” Blackwell said.

Read Jonathan and Thomas’ story and other stories of BCH residents atwww.bchfamily.org/stories___________________________________________Guatemala Missions

Volunteers Gail and Steve Cabe from Elkinspent December 8-10 training at Mills Homein Thomasville. The Cabes are leaving on January 10 to serve at the Good ShepherdChildren’s Home, BCH’s affiliate orphanagein Xela, Guatemala. The couple, who haspreviously volunteered at the orphanage,will stay for three months. The Cabes covetpeople’s prayers. Left to right, BCH’s ReginaKenner and Linda Russo, the Cabes, an BCH’schief operating officer Keith Henry. Learnmore at www.bchfamily.org/ guatemala___________________________________________Care HouseA group from Carolina Orthopedics in Shelbybrought Christmas gifts to the residents of

Care House on December 6. Care House inLenoir offers group home care and supportto single, teen mothers and their babies. Theladies ate Christmas treats with CareHouse’s mothers and staff and spent timesnuggling with the babies.

___________________________________________Broyhill Home

Kimani, Trevor and the other children atBroyhill Home in Clyde received decoratingassistance from members of First BaptistChurch in Lenoir. The group raked leaves onthe campus while others helped the childrenput up the Christmas tree and decorate thegymnasium.___________________________________________Odum Home

Recently, church volunteers came to OdumHome to help with different campus proj-ects. The ladies from Zion Hill BaptistChurch in Lawndale and Apex BaptistChurch in Apex volunteer at BCH’s Pem-

broke campus a couple of days every year.___________________________________________Children Helping Children

GAs and their leaders from First BaptistChurch in Lexington created a beautifulChristmas tree skirt made of ties. The donated ties were a part of a fundraiserfor BCH’s new orphanage in Guatemala. Thetree skirt was sold at the church’s missionsbazaar with the funds going to BCH.___________________________________________Care House

Care House held its annual “Thank You” din-ner on Friday, November 14. The meal is pre-pared by Care House and residents and staffto show appreciation to the volunteers andsupporter of the group home in Lenoir. Pic-tured: Reverend Don Ingle (middle), Clayand Janette Bollinger. Clay has served onBCH’s Board of Trustees.___________________________________________Family Care

Members of Freedom Assembly of God inRed Springs collected and donated food tothe Family Care mothers and children livingat Odum Home in Pembroke. Family Carestaff member Denise Lewis, front right, accepts the gift on behalf of the residents.Family Care for hard-working, single moth-ers and their children is available throughoutBCH’s statewide locations. Learn more atwww.bchfamily.org/familycare

[ AROUND THE STATE }

Every day at churches and BCH facilities “around the state,” residents, staff members and North Carolina Baptists are mak-

ing news. In Charity & Children and through BCH's social media posts, friendscan connect daily, weekly and monthly to learn about all of BCH's happenings.______________________________________________________________________________________

Stay connected online at www.bchfamily.org and on Facebook, Twitter,YouTube, and Vimeo. Also follow NCBAM (www.ncbam.org) and BCH'sDevelopmental Disabilities Ministry (www.hereismyhome.org).

You can meet the daily needs ofBCH’s boys and girls by sharingyour time, talents and resources.You can help in these ways:___________________________________

Food Roundup: This is a great opportunity for churches, businessesand organizations to help provide thefood needs of the boys and girls incare. Call 336-474-1277.

Friends of Children Workdays:The perfect one-day missions out-reach. Projects for all ages! StatewideBCH workdays available in May andSeptember. See 2015 dates on pg. 6Call 336-474-1209.

Mile of Pennies: Help by collecting a “Mile of Pennies.” When it comes toproviding care for hundreds of chil-dren, it takes everyone working to-gether – one penny added to anotherpenny and then another penny. Con-tinue to multiply the pennies and justimagine how far you can go in makinga real difference! Call 336-474-1209.

Walk for Change: Perfect for yourchurch or community organization –walkers recruit financial sponsors togive a cash gift for walking a certaindistance. Set your goal, secure yoursponsors, designate a safe route, and have fun! Call 336-474-1209.

Recycle Projects: Collect emptyprinter cartridges (laser, inkjet andfax cartridges). Deliver items to anyBCH facility or use prepaid shippinglabels to send items to recycler. Mil-lions of cartridges are thrown awayeach year. Begin collecting and helpthis year-round program earn moneyfor children. You can recycle cellphones, too. Call 336-474-1209.

Bike for Change: Bike for Change is a fun and dynamic way for childrento help "change" the lives of children.By pedaling bicycles, children raisesupport and awareness for BCH’sboys and girls. It is a great serviceproject for schools, churches, andother children’s groups. It alsoteaches children the importance ofparticipating in missions outreach. Visit www.bikeforchange.org forresources. Contact Bike for Changecoordinator Jay Westmoreland atbikeforchange@bchfamily.org

Sharing Hope...Changing LivesCapital Campaign: The campaign isabout securing BCH’s future so thatchildren and families who come intocare at the ministry’s 19 statewide lo-cations can count on having the safehome and care they need. ContactBrenda Gray at 336-689-4442. Visitwww.bchfamily.org/campaign

Get Involvedwww.bchfamily.org/getinvolved

A“new year” begins whether we want it to or not and they add up over the years. Think of all

the things you have seen or donethrough out your life. All of us havehad different upbringings. We couldall probably sit down and write abook just about our lives. YourKennedy Home (KH) alumni familywould love to know what is going onin your life right now. E-mail me any-time. What is your profession? Whatare you doing? What have you en-joyed the most in your life?

This past year has been exciting forBecky and me. I retired for the thirdtime. But now the Lord has asked meto serves as the Minister of SeniorAdults in my son Johnny’s churchwhere he serves as the choir director.He also runs two funeral homes inJacksonville and Richlands and I playthe piano for him. It really feels dif-ferent working for him and watchinghim direct music – I love it. By theway, my son Scott is a team leaderRN for Hospice and Home Healthof Carteret County.

This year’s KH Centennial Cele-bration was one for the historybooks. I want be around for the nexthundred year celebration but I amhoping to be at the 125th. I’m 71now and that will make me 96 then.I talked to my college piano teacherlast week and she is 99. She asked melots of questions and even remem-bered Becky’s name. Wow! I think Ican make it. How about you?

As I said earlier, the 100th. anniver-sary committee just had a final “get-together” meeting at the beachcottage. From what I heard, they justabout froze. Wish Becky and I couldhave been there, but she was too sickfor us to attend. Please keep prayingfor her all the time. She lives on painpills.

I asked Donna Weeks, betterknown as the milk lady, to fill us inwith a report. Donna delivereredmilk to all the cottages in the 70s.Here is what she wrote: “The mem-bers of the Kennedy Home 100th An-niversary Planning Committee met atthe beach cottage on November 14and 15 to have a ‘wrap up’ and cele-bration of the 100th anniversary. Bap-

tist Children’s Homes (BCH) staffmembers and KH alumni who wereon the planning committee who at-tended are: KH director BrianBaltzell, BCH staff members T.J.Slaughter, Alan Williams and BrendaGray; KH alumni and spouses: Jimand Ruth Ann Dyer, Dan and Geral-dine Medlin, Dan Russ, Donna Duty,Donna Daniels Wade, Dickie and PamMaynor, David and Sharon Maynor,and Jim and Toye Carter Creech.

“Friday evening began with a din-ner of sandwiches and great fellow-ship. Afterward, we spent timesharing our memories of the week-end. Some highlights were men-tioned such as the openingceremony, the tours of Cedar Dell,the food and ice cream, seeing theold farm equipment, and seeingmany alumni back for the first time.The sock hop on Saturday night wasa highlight of the weekend and theSunday morning church service wasdelightful. The worship service washigh on everyone’s list.

“We also watched the CentennialDVD. Some of us took a brisk walkon the beach, but we didn’t stay toolong because it was really cold. Backat the cottage, we enjoyed hot drinksand S’mores. The evening endedwith Karaoke until the late nighthours.

“It was such fun rememberinghow special the 100th anniversary wasto all of us. I am very thankful for theopportunity to help plan this impor-tant anniversary. It was a time that I’llnever forget and always cherish.”

A dear ol’ friend sent thesethoughts to me: “The time of givingand receiving has come and gone foranother year and I hope you had agreat Christmas with Jesus at the cen-ter of it all. With the new year begin-ning, I was thinking. It seems to methat as we go through life we all needto learn some important lessonsabout how to treat others. Here arefour to never forget.

“First Lesson – When I attendedcollege, there was a professor whogave a test one day and the last ques-tion asked us to write down the nameof the ‘cleaning lady’ who cleanedour room, hall and bathroom each

day. Someone asked the teacher if thelast question counted as part of thegrade. “Absolutely,” he said. In yourlife, you will meet many people. Allare significant. They deserve your at-tention and care, even if all you do issmile and say ‘Hello.’ I’ve never for-gotten that lesson. A friend remindedme to always let people in all jobsknow that you appreciate what theydo. Each one makes the world a bet-ter place.

“Second Lesson – This is a story Iheard about a lady who was standingby the road in the rain. Her car hadbroken down and she knew it wasn’tsafe to thumb but she had to get aride. A young man stopped, pickedher up, and got her to a safe placeand a taxi cab. She was in a bighurry, but she took the time to gethis name and address. A week wentby and, to his surprise, a knock cameat his door. It was a delivery manwith a giant console color TV. A spe-cial note was attached. It read:‘Thank you so much for assisting meon the highway the other night. Myspirits were very low at the time andthen you came along. Because ofyou, I was able to make it to mydying husband’s bedside just beforehe passed away. God Bless you.”

“Third Lesson – Do you rememberwhen an ice cream sundae cost muchless? There was a little 10-year-oldboy who went into a coffee shop andsat at a table. He asked the waitresshow much was an ice cream sundae.She told him and then he asked howmuch would a plain dish of ice creamcost? By now more people were wait-ing to be seated and the waitress wasgrowing impatient. “Thirty-fivecents,” she said with an irritatedtone.

“The little boy counted his changeand said. “I’ll have the plain dish ofice cream.” She brought it, left thebill on the table, and walked away.

“The boy finished the ice cream,paid the cashier and left. When thewaitress came back, she began to cryas she wiped the table. There, placedneatly beside the empty dish, weretwo nickels and five pennies. You see,he couldn’t have the sundae becausehe had to have enough left to leave

her a tip. “Doesn’t this really touch your

heart? When I’m in line at a quickfood place, I always listen to the peo-ple ahead of me to see if they haveenough money to buy what they areordering. You never know who youcan help.

“I live in a military town. Whenmy son and I go out to eat, he and Ipay for a military man’s meal withouthim knowing where it came from.We love to see the surprise and ex-pression on his face. Try it some-time.”

“Fourth Lesson – My friend is avolunteer at a hospital. She told mea story about a little girl who was suf-fering from a rare and serious disease.The little girl’s only chance for recov-ery appeared to be a blood transfu-sion from her 5-year old brother,who had miraculously survived thesame disease and had developed theantibodies needed to combat the ill-ness. The doctor explained the situa-tion to her little brother and askedthe little boy if he would be willingto give his blood to his sister. Hewaited a few moments, took a deepbreath and said, ‘Yes, I’ll do it if itwill save her.’

“As the transfusion progressed, helaid in bed next to her and smiled.Then his face grew pale and his smilefaded. He looked up at the doctorand asked with a trembling voice,‘Will I start to die right away?’

“The five-year-old had misunder-stood the doctor. The brotherthought he was going to have to givehis sister all of his blood in order tosave her. Would you do somethinglike this for your brother or sister?”

What great thoughts to ponder asthe new year begins. Becky and Iwish for you the best year that youhave ever had. Keep sending me re-ports so I can keep on keeping on

with this column. Bless you all!

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/kennedyhomealumni

John Thompson was the choir director at Kennedy Home from1972-1977. Today, he enjoys a veryactive retirement.

____________________________________________________________________

1/15 – Charity + Children – 128/1 11

[ KENNEDY HOME ALUMNI COLUMN }

Important lessons offered as new year begins –Reflecting on 2014, a year to remember_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

By John Thompson, 2324 Country Club Road, Jacksonville, NC 28546 (252)671-3515 jthompson117@ec.rr.com

More Homeword at www.bchfamily.org/charityandchildren____________________________________________________________________

12 1/15 – Charity + Children – 128/1

Your gift has twice the impact this Christmas!Give today and your investment will be matched dollar for dollar up to $250,000through a special gift challenge. One of BCH’s most dedicated friends has provided thisincredible opportunity that will allow you to maximize your generous investment in the lives of children like Thomas and his brother Jonathan, giving right now will doublethe amount of your gift! Help us meet the $250,000 goal by January 31, 2015.

Eight-year-old Thomas and 13-year-old brother Jonathan.

Kathy and I have lived in more apartments and houses than I care

to count in our 33 years of marriage. And in all the places where we have lived,only a few have had a dishwasher. Now, I know how that may sound since a dish-washer is a prerequisite for many tenantsand homeowners. But for me, it’s notsomething I’ve ever bemoaned. In fact, it is at the kitchen sink I learned one of themost important lessons of my married life.

Joel Houghton patented the first mechanicaldishwasher in 1850. It was a clanky, slow and unreliable device. Houghton’s invention attracted little attention since it was manipulatedby a crank and most thought it was easier just to keep washing by hand.

The first viable dishwasher was introduced atthe 1883 Chicago World’s Fair. The driving forcewas to create a device that would keep servantsfrom chipping fine china.

Englander William Howard Livens inventedthe first domestic use dishwasher in 1924 coin-ciding with indoor plumbing and running waterin homes. But it was in the postwar boom of the1950s when dishwashers became a commercialsuccess – well, amongmore wealthy house-holds, that is.

Today, the dish-washer is a common-place, fine-tuned assetthat not only washes but properly sterilizes cups,glasses and plates at temperatures of 150 to 180degrees.

So if the modern microprocessor-controlleddishwasher is such a great domestic tool, whywould I ever suggest washing dishes by hand? It’s a little less reliable than the engineered dish-washer and it is certainly more labor intensive.But the “how to” of dishwashing is not the point. It is the “why” of hand-washing.

Kathy became a stay-at-home mom soon after Kyle was born. I attended college classesand worked. As all married couples, we divviedour life’s chores. Kyle’s constant care and Kathy’sdetermination to make our small college apart-ment a castle for me to return to after a 12-hourday kept her busy and often exhausted.

At the end of one day, both tired, we met at the loveseat, sat together and wrapped ourarms around each other. Before long, I feltKathy’s body go limp as she began breathingdeeply – she had fallen asleep. We both had longdays, but there was more to do – items fromKathy’s list which had become way too long.Laying her head on a pillow, I rose from theloveseat, took a position at the kitchen sink, and began washing the day’s dirty dishes.

At that time, I didn’t think about what Kathywould think of me washing the dishes or if shewould be pleased, I only thought how I didn’twant her to wake and have dishes to wash.

Nearing the end of the stack of plates, I lookedup to see her watching me. Our eyes met and shesmiled softly, laid her head down, and fell backasleep.

So many years later, we do have a dishwasher. Our lives remain hectic. Kathy and I take turns loading the dishwasher and wiping the counters

and sink each evening. Water on the floor near the dishwasher door

was the first indicator that a repairman wasneeded. I called and we were told it would bethree days before the repairman could come toour home. We would revert to washing by hand.

Kathy washed the first evening. The next day had been exhausting for her and while sittingtogether watching television I felt her body golimp – she had fallen asleep. I held her until theshow we had been watching ended. I laid herhead on a pillow, rose from the loveseat, andtook a position at the kitchen sink.

I was rinsing the last of the dishes and about to dry when Kathy walked into the kitchen andour eyes met. She walked toward the laundryroom and as she passed me, she grinned and said,“You look handsome washing those dishes.”

There are many acts of love one can do to build a strong marriage. For husbands, let me suggest placing washing dishes near the top of the list. Clean plates are not the only

good results.

L O V E LOVEis the greatest

of these.

[ H O M E W O R D }

Washing dishes is more thancleaning plates_________________________________________________________

By Jim Edminson, Editor

Edminson is editor of Charity & Children and writes“Homeword” to inspire and encourage families in the midstof full lives and hectic schedules. He has recently publishedhis first book Under One Roof. Email him at wjedmin-son@bchfamily. org or call 1.800.476.3669, ext. 1217 for

information on how you can get your copy. Proceeds benefit the children andfamilies served by BCH. Also, contact Jim for speaking availability.