bc parent winter 2013 edition

winter issue 2013www.bcparent.ca

Live your life’s dream

Understanding AUTISM

WINTER Education

Guide

2 bcparent.ca • winter 2013

INFANT CIRCUMCISION

T R U S T O U R E X P E R I E N C E !Dr. Pollock has safely performed

over 35,000 circumcisions.

OFFICES IN VANCOUVER

AND NEW WESTMINISTER

604 –717–6200

FOR MORE INFORMATION,INCLUDING A VIDEO, VISIT

www.circumcisionvancouver.comFOR NO-SCALPEL VASECTOMY VISIT

www.pollockclinics.com

• Takes under30 seconds

• Virtually painless

• BC’s most referredto circumcisionphysician(15+ years)

bcparent.ca • winter 2013 3

Winter Issue 2013Volume 22, Number 1

Mail Address: Sasamat RPO 72086 Vancouver, BC V6R 4P2

email: [email protected]

inside... 4 5 Phrases toEncourage ChildrenWhat does encouragement sound like?

6 Understanding andAccepting AutismThis condition covers a widespectrum

8 Help your child dowell in school

Follow us on

http://twitter.com/bcparentmag

BC Parent Newsmagazine

Publisher/Executive Editor: Forrest Phillips

Editor: Geoffrey Legh

Advertising Design & Layout: Julie Cochrane

Editorial Design & Layout: RetroMetroDesigns www3.telus.net/retrometro

Advertising Sales: [email protected]

Circulation: Gold Distribution

Contributors: Kelly Bartlett, Lela Davidson, SandraGordon, Gayle Grace, Patrick Hempfing, HeidiSmith Luedtke, Bev YaworskiBC Parent is published 8 times per year. The Publisher reserves the right to omit advertisingwhich is judged to be in poor taste or which doesnot conform to the concept of this publication. Canadian Publications Mail Registration No.251836

10 Winter Education Guide

16 Live your life’s dreamIt starts now

18 A prescription forbetter healthExercise

20 The legend of my ten-pound babyThe gold star for birth weight

22 Windows and WheelsA dad’s journey of letting go


I t’s no secret that kids need encourage-ment to thrive. But what exactly doesencouragement sound like? It’s different

than praise or admiration or guidance. It iscommon to want to give evaluative feed-back to kids for their work (“Good color-ing!”), or to tell them what we like abouttheir accomplishments (“I like how you setthe table.”), or what we expect of their be -havior. (“You need to try your best at schooltoday.”) Though these kinds of responsesare well meaning, they teach kids to rely onour evaluations rather than to learn to formtheir own judgments about behavior.

Alfie Kohn, researcher and author of Pun -ish ed by Rewards, says that kids can come todepend on praise and external validationinstead of finding satisfaction in doing theright thing simply because it’s the right thingto do. “Rather than bolstering a child’s self-esteem, praise may increase kids’ depend-ence on us. It leads them to measure their

worth in terms of what will lead us to smileand dole out some more approval,” saysKohn. He recommends that parents focuson supporting and encouraging their child’sefforts, rather than on praising the results.

Encouragement is about teaching kids tosee the value of their own accomplishmentsand to be in charge of their own success. Itfosters internal strength and motivation bykeeping the focus of children’s behavior onthemselves instead of anyone else. As psy-chologist Rudolf Dreikurs said, “A childneeds encouragement like a plant needswater.” Here are five encouraging things tosay to your kids on a regular basis:

For tasks that a child has com-pleted, let him know his efforts are appreci-ated. Tell him, “That helped a lot,” and, “Iappreciate the time you spent on this.” Itlets him know that his work is meaningful

5 Phrases to

Encourage

Children

and he is an important contributor to thefamily. Saying ‘thank you’ is no less celebra-tory than saying ‘good job.’ Expressing grati-tude for a job well done still communicatesexcitement and pride. The difference is youdon’t need to tell your child that what hedid was good; he will inherently feel it.

Claire, a stay-at-home mom of 3 boys,said that at dinner one night, she thankedher 3-year-old, Tucker, for giving each fami-ly member a napkin to use. When Tuckerclimbed into his chair and replied, “Mama,I like you thanking me. That feels nice,” shewas struck by the power of those simplewords. Without any praise, Tucker felt sig-nificant and appreciated; he felt his “goodjob,” and he was motivated to do it again.

Use this kind of encourage-ment for when a child has achieved a goalor milestone. Cheer for her by focusing on

By Kelly Bartlett

Thankyou!

Youdid it!

conversation than a one-sided monologue.When a child is heard, she feels known.

It’s important for kids to knowthat their feelings are always OK. Learninghow to manage these feelings takes support,acceptance, and lots of practice. Encouragekids by communicating that they are notwrong to experience unpleasant feelings likesadness, anger, or fear. Instead of saying,“You’re OK. Don’t be upset,” let your childknow, “You have the right to feel angry. Iunderstand; I would feel mad, too.” Or, “I cansee you feel very sad right now, and that’sOK.” Validating your child’s feelings leadsto his own acceptance of them, and the real-ization that he is capable of handling them.

Instead of providing theanswers and directing kids toward what todo, encourage them to make decisions andsolve problems by letting them know youtrust their ability to decide for themselves.Say things like, “I know you can figure thisout,” “I have faith in you to find a solu-


tion,” “I know you’ll make an appropriatedecision,” or “You lead the way on this.”Entrusting kids to make their own decisionsis very empowering for young chil dren! Itshifts the dynamic from a parent’s controlover a child to one of shared control. Itencourages kids to think through problemsand come up with their own solutions.

Remember that by opting for encour-agement over praise, you’re not ignoringyour kids’ accomplishments or successes.Encouragement is simply about keepingyour response focused on their efforts andfeelings as opposed to only the outcomes.Encouraging words not only reassure kidsduring times of success (“Wow, that took alot of concentration!”), but also in times ofdisappointment (“I have faith in you to fixthis mistake.”). Instead of looking to a par-ent for affirmation, kids are able to decidehow they feel about themselves. Their fail-ures and successes, as they should be, areabout them, not anyone else.

Kelly Bartlett is the author of “Encouraging Words For Kids.”She is a Certified Positive Discipline Educator and freelance writerwith a focus on child development, family relationships, and disci-pline. You can find more of her work at www.kellybartlett.net

the effort it took to get there, rather than onthe outcome. Instead of saying, “I like howyou built that Lego tower,” respond with,“Wow you worked hard on that!”, “Look atwhat you accomplished!”, or, “You mustfeel proud.” Responses like these focus theaccomplishment on the child’s inner work,rather than on a parent’s external evalua-tion. It’s much more encouraging to say,“You sure never gave up during your game!”than, “You won your game, good job.”

What could be more encour-aging than to know someone is receptiveto what you have to say? Active listeningvalidates a child’s sense of significance andbelonging in the fam ily; they know they’reimportant and they matter. Let kids knowyou’re taking their thoughts seriously byechoing their statements back to them.There should be some back-and-forth withopen-ended questions (“What would youdo about that?”), empathy (“Wow, you musthave felt scared.”), and reflections (“Oh, youdecided to take a break so you could calmdown.”) Good listening sounds more like a

I’mlistening

It’s OKto cry

I trustyou

“YOUR CHILD’S CARE IS OUR FOCUS”

DR. GARTNER, Certified Specialist in

Pediatric Dentistry, withIrina and Alison

. . .COMMITTED TO . . .

� Building relationshipswith families

� Promoting good oralhealth and well being� Providing quality

preventative and restorativeservices

� Creating a caring environment and a positive

experience

219 – 179 DAVIE STREET, VANCOUVER

604-569-3669 www.tot2teendental.com

The original, largest and still the best networkof performing arts schools in the world.

Nurturing and developing young people’s potential through dance, drama, and singing.

For 4-18 year oldsat weekends and summer camps

www.stagecoachschools.caTOLL FREE 1-877-78-STAGE (78243)

Spring Term& Summer Camp

Registrationnow Open!

SING! DANCE! ACT NOW!

New class

times added,

including

Sundays!

Vancouver Eastside/Westside � RichmondSurrey � Victoria � Coquitlam � Langley


es de velopmental disability. It is also called AutismSpectrum Disorder (ASD). “Spectrum” refers to acontinuum of severity or developmental impairment.Autism affects the way the brain functions, resultingin difficulties with communication and social inter-action, and unusual patterns of behaviour, activitiesand interests. Children and adults with ASD usuallyhave particular communication, social and behav-ioural characteristics in common, but the conditionscover a wide spectrum, with individual differences in:• number and particular kinds of symptoms• severity: mild to severe• age of onset• levels of functioning• challenges with social interactions

When speaking of ASD, two of the most commondisorders are:• Autistic Disorder (also called autism, classic autism

and AD)• Asperger’s Disorder (also called AS, Asperger’s Syn -

drome and Asperger Syndrome)

Karen is a parent of a young child with autism.A co-worker was the first person to suggest toKaren that her son might have autism.

“Apparently others suspected it too, but they neversaid anything to us,” she says. After receiving a diag-nosis, her son received treatments including speechand social language therapy. The family also obtainedvaluable support from their local Autism Society.While there are many challenges that come with car-ing for a child with autism, Karen’s son has taughther that every day is a new day and that there arealways many opportunities to learn new skills.

“Love is unconditional,” she says. “Every child hasspecial characteristics that make him or her a specialpart of your heart. No matter how hard things get,you fight for what is right, what is needed and whatis important. Having a disability does not mean thatyou cannot be an important part of society, or thatyou don’t want the same things as all children—acceptance.”

Autism is a neurological disorder, which caus-

Understanding and Accepting Autism

By Bev Yaworski

The earlier chil dren are able to receiveappropriateevidence-basedtreatment andintervention, thebetter theirprognosis.


Possible CausesThe cause or causes of ASD are still unknown. It isgenerally accepted that it is a neurological disorder.Today, research around the world focuses on possiblecauses such as genetics, differences in biological brainfunction, pre- and post-natal brain development,environmental factors, viral infections and immuneresponses and deficiencies. Many possible causes arebeing investigated. Parenting styles do not cause chil-dren to have autism.

Treatment & TherapySome people with a form of autism enjoy a very highlevel of functioning and they may need little or nospecial treatment or educational programming. Incontrast, there are many families with children dis-playing seriously debilitating autism conditions whosuffer deeply from a myriad of symptoms. These chil-dren require intensive support, special educationalprogramming and effective evidence-based treatment.

ASBC Autism Society of British Columbia be -lieves that early, scientifically validated effective treat-ment can lead to great improvement for many peoplewith autism. Without appropriate individualizedtreatment, many people with autism will not developsuccessful communication and social skills and willcontinue to experience serious behaviour and learn-ing difficulties. The Autism Society of BC providesinformation on support groups, scholarships, accom-modations, employment, a lending library and otherhelpful resources for families and people with ASDs.

PrognosisAutism is a lifelong disability. There is no knownmedi cal “cure” for autism, but many of the disablingsymptoms are treatable. It is possible to help mostpeople, even those with severely debilitating autismconditions, to experience significant improvementsin their symptoms and in their ability to function.Some children may even improve to the point of be -ing indistinguishable from their peers. The earlier chil -dren are able to receive appropriate evidence-basedtreatment and intervention, the better their prognosis.

More work still needs to be done to give familiesbetter access to diagnosis and treatment becauseCanada’s Medical Health Plan provides very limitedfunding—a situation that requires the public toadvocate and talk to their elected officials to bringspeedy resolution to this matter.

ASD occurs in about 1 in 150 people in Canada,usually appearing during the first three years of life. Itis four times more common in boys than girls.Asperger Syndrome is often diagnosed later, once achild reaches school age. Initially, parents may experi-ence denial that their child has autism. Embarrass -ment, fear, or possible public stigma may be felt.Increasingly, autism has come out of the shadows togreater public recognition as an accepted medicalcondition.

Symptoms & DiagnosisThe Autism Society of British Columbia (ASBC) is aparent-based and directed society providing educa-tion and support to individuals with autism and theirfamilies. Michael Lewis, President of ASBC says:“The important thing, if you suspect autism in yourfamily, is don’t let time go by. It’s not going to get bet-ter on its own. You want to get to the bottom ofthings as soon as possible. People need to acknowl-edge autism is a medical condition. It requires med-ical expertise for diagnosis and professional guidancefor treatment.”

People with ASD develop differently from othersin motor, language, cognitive and social skills. Eachperson with an ASD is unique and with differentabilities. “Symptoms” or disabilities might be verymild in one person and quite severe in another. Hereare examples of common types of characteristics andbehaviours in a child or adult with an ASD:• Difficulty with social skills• Problems with communication• Repeated behaviours and restricted interests• Unusual responses to sensations• Some co-occurring conditions such as gastro-intes-

tinal problemsParents, family members or caregivers of children

are often the first to notice delays in the usual child-hood developmental milestones. Diagnosis is basedon observation of specific behaviours and disabilitiesby a team of doctors and other professionals trainedin autism diagnosis. Misdiagnosis or lack of diagnosiscan cause serious delays in the child receiving neces-sary treatment for her/his complex needs. Unfortun -ately, parents of children with autism disorders areoften erroneously told that their child is just a bit slowto develop certain skills, or that he/she has a behav-iour problem, learning disability, hearing problem oris just a bit eccentric.

While there aremany challenges

that come withcaring for a child

with autism, Karen’sson has taught herthat every day is anew day and that

there are alwaysmany opportunities

to learn new skills.

Autism Society of British Columbia http://www.autismbc.ca/ The organization welcomes volunteer participation and donations.

Autism Society Canada: http://www.autismsocietycanada.ca/

BC Ministry of Children and Family Development—Autism Initiatives Branch:www.mcf.gov.bc.ca/autism/ information on government programmes associated with ASD. R

es

ou

rce

s


says Rebecca Branstetter, an educationaland clinical psychologist in Oakland, Cali for -nia. By the 5th grade, kids are also beginningto set goals, work independently, func tionbetter in groups, make more complex deci-sions and become organized with theirschool and homework.

Success RxExtend learning beyond school. Reinforcewhat your child is learning in school withactivities at home. For example, let yoursecond grader count change at the checkoutand measure the ingredients while you’rebaking cookies together (fractions). Have hertell time. Talk about numbers while you’redriving, such as how fast you’re going, thedistance you’ll travel, and how long it willtake to get there. Play board games togetherinvolving money, time, logic or vocabularysuch as the family edition of Monopoly,Scrabble or Apples to Apples. On the week-ends, take family outings to museums andzoos to visit exhibits that coincide with schoolsubjects. “If your child is learning aboutEgypt, take a trip to a local museum with anEgyptian exhibit,” says Branstetter. “It rein-forces curiosity, sends the subtle message

F rom crawling, walking and babblingto the angst and rebellion of the tweenand teen years, children constantly go

through a predictable set of developmentalstages physically, intellectually, emotionallyand socially. “Along the way, any of theseareas can be ahead or behind the others intheir timing, then switch, which can be con -fusing for parents,” says Vivian Seltzer, Ph.D.,professor of human development and be -havior at the University of Pennsylvania inPhiladelphia.

You can start out with a precociouslearner who is seemingly ahead of everyoneelse, for example, only to find out two yearslater that his classmates have caught up andthey’re speeding ahead. Not to worry. It’s alljust part of growing up. Still, “knowingwhere your child is at developmentally canhelp you understand and support him,” Dr.Seltzer says. Most kids don’t need a lot ofhelp navigating the landscape, especially theolder they get. But it helps to be aware ofwhere they’re at so you can guide themalong the way and step in if you need to.Use our guide to help your child make themost of every age and stage, from kinder-garten through high school.

Elementary School: Milestone ManiaWhat’s happening now: From Kindergartenthrough fifth grade, kids make major strides,from initially learning how to transition toschool and being comfortable with a class-room routine to learning how to read (Kin -dergarten and 1st grade) to reading to learn(the 3rd grade and beyond) in all subjectareas. Emotionally, they begin to develop

their academic self-esteem based on feedbackfrom you and their teachers. By the 4th and5th grade, they’re moving from concrete toabstract thinking. “When concrete thinkerssee the Statue of Liberty, they see it as a ladywith a torch. An abstract thinker also sees itas a symbol of freedom and democracy,”

Elementary Rx: Play board games togetherinvolving money, time, logicor vocabulary such as the

family edition of Monopoly,Scrabble or Apples to Apples.

By Sandra Gordon


cione says. Instead, use phrases like: “I’msorry you feel that way” or “Gosh, that musthave been embarrassing for you,” rather than“Just ignore it” or “Just get over it. It’s not abig deal.” It is a big deal to your child. Placa -tions don’t help and can be harmful. “Theycan push your child away because she’ll feellike you just don’t get it,” Panaccione says.Don’t be too concerned if your child startsto hang with the wrong crowd. “As kidsdevelop and decide who they want to be,they need to decide who they don’t want tobe,” says Seltzer. They may try on variousgroups, including one that’s not your fav -orite, to see what feels right. All kids havefriends their parents don’t like. But kids aregood self-barometers. “Don’t butt in unlessyou think their friends are dangerous,”Seltzer cautions.

Empathize academically. In middle school,the work load gets more difficult becausekids have to meet the demands of up toseven different teachers instead of just one.“It’s a big challenge. The best thing you cando is allow your child to vent,” Panaccionesays. If your child complains that one of histeachers gives too much homework, forexample, you might say, “Well, what do youthink you might need to do, given that hegives lots of homework?” rather than “He’sonly trying to teach you.” The idea is tohelp your child solve the problem, find hisown way and keep the lines of communica-tion open so your child will continue to feelcomfortable talking to you about even big-ger problems that might come along later.

High School: The Who-Am-I? YearsWhat’s happening now. In high school,children forge their identity academically, so -cially, morally, sexually and spiritually while

trying to figure out who they are apart fromyou. “High schoolers question everythingand may even rebel against your opinionsand beliefs,” says Panaccione. If you’re aDemocrat, for example, your child mightsay he’s a Republican. If you’re a meat-and-potatoes family, she’ll become a Vegan. Youget the idea.

Success RxKeep talking. Allow your child to questionyour opinions and values and express him-self. Ask questions such as, “Oh, why do youthink so?” rather than lecturing or yelling.“It’s a great time to find out who your kidsreally are,” Panaccione says.Note dramatic changes. It’s normal for highschoolers to be just as moody as middleschoolers. But if your teen shows a drasticchange in personality, behavior, a signifi-cant drop in grades, study habits or atti-tude, or a dramatic shift in appearance,dress or grooming, or interests, goals oractivities, know that something’s up. “Talkto your teen about your concerns,” saysPanaccione. Start by saying something like:“I’m concerned that you’re spending time inbed when you used to be out with yourfriends.” Then listen to what your child hasto say. If the behaviors are a sign of rebellingagainst a lack of freedom or privilege, beopen to discussing and compromising. Ifyou’re concerned your child may be sufferingfrom depression or another mental healthdisorder, seek professional help. “Your child’sprimary care provider or the school guid-ance counselor is a good resource for a refer-ral to qualified child/teen psychologists inyour area,” Panaccione says. Help your child deal with college pressure.By the 11th grade, college pressure comeson strong. But start talking college nowonly if your child is ready to. “Some kids arefocused. But most have no idea what theywant to do or major in,” Panaccione says.To reduce anxiety, Panaccione tells her highschool patients that they don’t have to knowwhat they want to do going into college.That’s where they’ll figure it out, which issomething you could say at home, too.Also, listen to your child’s wishes for collegerather than pushing your agenda. “To besuccessful, kids should end up going to acollege that’s right for them,” she says.

Sandra Gordon is a Journalist and author of The ReunionDiet and Consumer Reports Best Baby Products

that school is important and shows yourchild that school and home are connected.”Develop a homework habit. Make doinghomework automatic by coming up with aroutine that fits your child’s personality.Some kids like doing homework right afterschool. Others need to burn off steam byplaying for half an hour first (set a timer)before getting down to business. Whateveryou choose, stick to the schedule you estab-lish for your kids as much as possible. Tominimize distractions, keep the TV off dur-ing homework time. For younger kids, begineach homework session by asking your childto explain what she’s supposed to do thengauge if she can do it alone or if she needsyour help. If you’re not around when yourchild does his homework, let him knowyou’ll look at it when you get home and besure to follow through. “Praise him when hecompletes him homework by emphasizingthe process, such as “You worked really hardto learn your math facts” rather than theproduct “Good job on learning your mathfacts.” “Praising the process teaches persist-ence, which is a skill kids need for schoolsuccess,” Branstetter says.

Middle School: Hormone HavocWhat’s happening now. In middle school—the 6th through 8th grade, kids are startingto go through puberty and the physicalchanges can make them feel like they’re notin control of their bodies. “It’s a complicatedtime physically, socially and emotionally,”says Vicki Panaccione, Ph.D., a licensed psy -chologist and founder of the Better Paren -ting Institute (www.betterparentinginstitute.com) in Melbourne, Florida. During thisdifficult age and stage, their sense of self isalso developing. “There’s a lot of exclusionin middle school,” says Panaccione. Cliquescan provide a safe haven as kids try to figurethemselves out.

Success RxExpect turmoil. The mood swings and over-reactions, such as total hysteria over wheth -er a boy or girl looked at your child or notin the hallway, are a normal part of thisphase of development. “Don’t take it per-sonally. Just understand that your child isgoing through a lot,” says Panaccione. Besupportive but don’t minimize the problemor try to fix it either. “Middle schoolersdon’t want you to solve anything,” Panac -

Middle School Rx: If your child complains that

one of his teachers gives toomuch homework, for example,you might say, “Well, what doyou think you might need to

do, given that he gives lots ofhomework?” rather than “He’s

only trying to teach you.”


independentschoolsBodwell High School/BodwellAcademyCo-ed, grades 8–12North Vancouver604/924-5056www.bodwell.edu/highschool/

Brentwood College SchoolCo-ed, grades 9–12Mill Bay250/743-5521www.brentwood.bc.ca

Brockton School 604/929-9201www.brocktonschool.com

Children’s Hearing & Speech Centre of BCCo-ed, grades PS-3Vancouver604/437-0255www.childrenshearing.caDeaf /hard of hearing children learn tolisten and speak in a cognitively-based, family centered auditory-oralschool. Services for infants, preschool,pre-k, primary grades. Itinerant teachers in mainstream schools, outreach to B.C. families

Choice SchoolCo-ed, grades K-7Richmond604/273-2418www.choiceschool.org

Collingwood SchoolCo-ed, JK–12West Vancouver604/925-3331www.collingwood.org

Core Education & Fine Arts (cefa)Co-ed, JK & CefababyWest Van 604/913-7713Canada Way 604/299-2373Langley 604/881-2332North Van 604/929-2332New Westminster 604/777-0053Vancouver 604/879-2332White Rock 778/294-2648Richmond 604/275-2332Kingsway 604/568-8808www.cefa.caJunior Kindergarten school for childrenages 1 to 5. Curriculum includes read-ing, writing, mathematics, science,music, drama and languages

Crofton HouseGirls, grades 1–12Vancouver604/263-3255www.croftonhouse.ca

École Française Internationale deVancouver Co-ed, PS–7North Vancouver604/924-2457www.efiv.org

Fraser AcademyCo-ed, grades 1–12Vancouver604/736-5575www.fraseracademy.caThe Lower Mainland’s only fullyaccredited day school for students ingrades 1–12 with dyslexia and otherlanguage-based learning disabilities.Daily one-to-one O-G instruction; fullcurriculum with specialist teachers infine & applied arts, PE, technology.

Fraser Valley Elementary SchoolCo-ed, K–3Langley604/533-5469www.fves.bc.ca

Kenneth Gordon Maplewood SchoolCo-ed, grades 2-8North Vancouver604/985-5224www.kgms.ca

Madrona School SocietyCo-ed, grades 4–7Vancouver604/732-9965www.madronaschool.com

Marpole Bilingual MontessoriSchoolCo-ed, PS–KVancouver604/266-1091Our program sets a fantastic founda-tion for your child. With our uniqueapproach to the daily Bilingual FrenchProgram combined with the Montes -sori Curriculum, your child will beprepared academically, soially, emotion-ally and physically.

Meadowridge SchoolCo-ed, JK–12Maple Ridge604/467-4444www.meadowridge.bc.ca

Mulgrave SchoolCo-ed, Pre-K–12West Vancouver604/922-3223www.mulgrave.com

North Star MontessoriCo-ed, PS–7North Vancouver604/980-1205www.northstarmontessori.ca

Oak and Orca Bioregional SchoolVictoria250-383-6609oakandorca.ca

Pacific Rim Montessori AcademyCo-ed, K–7Vancouver604/726-8428www.pacificrimmontessori.com

Pacific Spirit SchoolCo-ed, K–8Vancouver604/222-1900www.pacificspiritschool.org

Richmond Jewish Day SchoolK–7Richmond604/275-3393www.rjds.ca

St. George’s SchoolBoys, grades 1–12Vancouver604/224-1304www.stgeorges.bc.caNestled in the heart of one of theworld’s most beautiful cities, St. George’sSchool of Vancouver is Canada’s WorldSchool for boys. With its multi-facetedand international curriculum, close to a100% of graduates are accepted to uni -ver sities worldwide, many on scholarship.

St. John’s SchoolCo-ed, K–12Vancouver604/732-4434 / 604/629-2458 www.stjohns.bc.ca

St. John’s International SchoolCo-ed, grades 10–12 w/ESL ProgramVancouver604/683-4572www.stjohnsis.com

St. Margaret’s SchoolGirls, ECE–12Victoria250/479-7171www.stmarg.ca

education guide


St. Michaels University SchoolCo-ed, K–12Victoria250/370-6170www.smus.bc.ca

Shawnigan Lake SchoolCo-ed, grades 8–12Shawnigan Lake250/743-5516www.shawnigan.ca

Southpointe AcademyCo-ed, PS–12Tsawwassen604/948-8826www.southpointeacademy.ca

Stratford HallCo-ed, K–12Vancouver604/436-0608www.stratfordhall.ca

Traditional Learning AcademyCo-ed, K–12Coquitlam604/931-7265www.traditionallearning.com

Urban AcademyCo-ed, JK–10New Westminster604/524-2211www.urbanacademy.ca

Vancouver College604/261-4285www.vc.bc.ca

Vancouver Hebrew Academy604/264-1245, Vancouverwww.vhebrewacademy.com

Vancouver Montessori SchoolCo-ed, PS–7Vancouver604/261-0315www.vancouvermontessorischool.com

Vancouver Talmud TorahCo-ed, PS–7Vancouver604/736-7307www.talmudtorah.com

education guide

pers onal best!1.800.EDUCATE

SylvanLearning.ca

Discover your child’s

Learning S hould Be Personal. ™erldhongarea

1.800.EDUC

our child has theYYohe or she can lear

™onal.l ™rsd Be Peoulhg SninniraeL

TEAAT1.800.EDUC.caearninganLylvS

ou with hoe yo amazy tour child has the abilitan can unlock thaylvn – She or she can lear

TE

w much ou with hoy!t abilitan can unlock tha

Use Mathletics to Help your Child Excel

’S NOAA’CANAD

. 1’S NO

Improves confidence in-based resource that:results

Mathletics is a proven,

xcd EExlldur Chiilyoouotics ttoeetthlleae MUs

TH WEBSMAATS NOAACANAD

Improves confidence in-based resource that:

Mathletics is a proven,

lxcepllpo He

TH WEBSITE. 1’S NO

Is used by parents andCurriculum

rovincial K-12Aligned to Pengaginglearning that is fun and

directedOffers self-childrenImproves confidence in

Is used by parents and

rovincial K-12

learning that is fun anddirected

Improves confidence in

teachers worldwideIs used by parents and

eceive weekly progressRprocess of your childMonitor the learning

Centre, where you can:progress through the P

eep track of your child’sK

teachers worldwideIs used by parents and

eceive weekly progressprocess of your childMonitor the learning

Centre, where you can:arentprogress through the P

eep track of your child’s

customerservice@3plearningtoll free: 1-877-467-6851

.mathletics.wwww.ready-made certificates

ward your child withAreports

eceive weekly progressR

.cacustomerservice@3plearningtoll free: 1-877-467-6851

.mathletics.caready-made certificates

ward your child with

eceive weekly progress


Vancouver Waldorf SchoolCo-ed, PS–12North Vancouver604/985-7435www.vws.ca

West Point Grey AcademyCo-ed, JK–12Vancouver604/222-8750www.wpga.ca

Westside Montessori AcademyCo-ed, PS-3Vancouver604/434-9611Westside Montessori Academy, at theItalian Cultural Centre, has been offer-ing Preschool and Elementary classessince 2008. Preschool offers AM andPM classes (full-day is available).Elementary offers; K to Grade 3 (up to Grade 7 by 2015).

York House SchoolGirls, JK–12Vancouver604/736-6551www.yorkhouse.ca

Francophone School Listings— Conseil scolaire francoph-one de la Colombie-Britannique (SD No 93)École Mer-et-montagneK – 7Campbell River250-923-3359http://meretmontagne.csf.bc.ca

École secondaire Phoenix7 – 8 – 9Campbell River250-923-3359http://meretmontagne.csf.bc.ca

École secondaire Carihi10 – 12Campbell River250-923-3359http://meretmontagne.csf.bc.ca

École La VérendryeK – 7Chilliwack604-858-2666http://verendrye.csf.bc.ca

École au Cœur-de-l’îleK – 12Comox250-339-1848http://aucoeurdelile.csf.bc.ca

École du Bois-joliK – 6Delta604-948-7007http://boisjoli.csf.bc.ca

École Collines-d’orK – 7Kamloops250-579-9223http://collinesdor.csf.bc.ca

École de l’Anse-au-sableK – 12Kelowna250-764-2771http://anseausable.csf.bc.ca

École des VoyageursK – 7Langley604-881-0222http://voyageurs.csf.bc.ca

École des Deux-rivesK – 7Mission604-820-5710http://deuxrives.csf.bc.ca

École OcéaneK – 7Nanaimo250-714-0761http://oceane.csf.bc.ca

École secondaire de Nanaimo8 – 12Nanaimo250-714-0761; http://oceane.csf.bc.ca

École des Sentiers-alpinsK – 5Nelson250-362-3395http://nelson.csf.bc.ca

École André-PiolatK – 12North Vancouver604-980-6040http://andrepiolat.csf.bc.ca

École de la Vallée-de-PembertonK – 7Pemberton604-932-9602http://pemberton.csf.bc.ca

École Entre-lacsK – 8Penticton250-770-7691http://entrelacs.csf.bc.ca

École secondaire de Penticton9 – 12250-770-7691http://entrelacs.csf.bc.ca

École des Grands-cèdresK – 6Port Alberni250-723-5614http://grandscedres.csf.bc.ca

École des Pionniers-de-MaillarvielleK – 12Port Coquitlam604-552-7915http://pionniers.csf.bc.ca

École Virtuelle8 – 12Port Coquitlam778-284-0909http://ecolevirtuelle.csf.bc.ca

École Côte-du-SoleilK – 9; Powell River604-485-8430http://cotedusoleil.csf.bc.ca

École secondaire Brooks10 – 12Powell River604-485-8430http://cotedusoleil.csf.bc.ca

École Franco-nordK – 7Prince George250-612-0755http://franconord.csf.bc.ca

École secondaire Duchess Park8 – 12, Prince George250-612-0755http://franconord.csf.bc.ca

École des NavigateursK – 6, Richmond604-718-5629http://navigateurs.csf.bc.ca

education guide

MarpoleBilingual

Montessori (Est. 1985)

Pre-School, Junior Kindergarten& Kindergarten Celebrating Over 25 years of MontessoriTeaching in the Community

Our enriched Montessori curriculum includes: The Phonetic approach to Reading & Writing,

Mathematics, Geography, Science, Music, Art, French,Yoga and a variety of Cultural subjects. Children are

required to wear school uniforms.

We offer 2-1/2 hour and 3-1/2 hour programs for 2-1/2 to 5 year olds as well as an Extended

day program for 5 year olds. Private English Tutoringand Afterschool Phonics classes are also offered.

1296 W 67TH AVE., VANCOUVER, BC V6P 2T2FOR AN APPOINTMENT PLEASE CALL

TEL: 604-266-1091 � EMAIL: bilingualmontessori@hotmail.comwww.marpolebilingualmontessori.com


École des Sept-sommetsK – 6Rossland250-362-3395http://septsommets.csf.bc.ca

École du PacifiqueK – 7, Sechelt604-885-4743http://pacifique.csf.bc.ca

École secondaire Chatelech8 – 12Sechelt604-885-4743http://pacifique.csf.bc.ca

École Les AiglonsK – 7Squamish604-898-3715http://aiglons.csf.bc.ca

École Gabrielle-RoyK – 12Surrey604-599-6688http://gabrielleroy.csf.bc.ca

École Jack-CookK – 7Terrace250-635-9754http://jackcook.csf.bc.ca

École Rose-des-ventsK – 6Vancouver

604-267-9022http://rosedesvents.csf.bc.ca

École Anne-HébertK – 6Vancouver604-437-4849http://annehebert.csf.bc.ca

École secondaire Jules-Verne7 – 12Vancouver604-731-8378http://julesverne.csf.bc.ca

École Victor-BrodeurK – 12Victoria250-220-6010http://brodeur.csf.bc.ca

École La PasserelleK – 7Whistler604-932-9602http://passerelle.csf.bc.ca

preschoolsAdvantage PreschoolBurnaby604/435-1263advantagepreschool.ca/

Alpha PreschoolRichmond604/277-6511

Brainbridge Bilingual Education andFine Arts CentreVancouver604/322-6830www.brainbridge.ca

Blue Heron Montessori SchoolRichmond604/232-9001

Brentwood Montessori Preschool & KindergartenBurnaby604/294-2671

Burnaby French LanguagePlayschool604/432-1323www.bflp.org

Canyon Heights PreschoolNorth Vancouver604/986-5597www.canyonheightspreschool.com

Cherub MontessoriRichmond604/277-1219www.mypreschool.ca

Children’s House MontessoriCoquitlam604/931-1311www.montessoribc.com

Cloverleaf MontessoriSurrey604/574-9899

Core Education & Fine Arts (CEFA)West Vancouver, Burnaby, Langley,North Vancouver, New Westminster,Vancouver, White Rock and Richmond604/913-7713www.cefa.ca

Cornerstone Christian AcademyRichmond604/303-9181

Council of Parent ParticipationPreschools604/435-4430, 800/488-0660www.cpppreschools.bc.caPreschools belonging to the Council of Parent Participation Preschools areadministered and supported by theparents. A fully qualified preschoolteacher provides a play-based programfor children 32 months to 5 years oldand the parents take turns as classroomhelpers, usually once or twice a month.Parent Education is provided monthlyallowing parents to improve their par-enting skills.

Discovery MontessoriRichmond, 604/807-9796

Discovery Quest MontessoriSurrey, 604/581-1620

Dunbar Memorial PreschoolVancouver604/222-6065www.dunbarmemorialpreschool.ca

education guide

A different kind of schoolWESTSIDE MONTESSORI SCHOOL


Morning Glory MontessoriRichmond604/272-2821

Pacific Rim Montessori AcademyVancouver604/726-8428www.pacificrimmontessori.com

Paddington Station FineartsPreschoolRichmond604/221-0141www.theartsconnection.ca

Pomme d’Api PreschoolVancouver604/877-1122www.pommedapi.org

Reach for the Stars MontessoriVancouver604/688-7827www.reachforthestarsmontessori.com

Sandcastle Park Children’s CentreRichmond604/274-8380www.sandcastlepark.ca

St. Savior’s Christian PreschoolRichmond604/277-1079

Sunflower AcademyVancouver604/222-1114www.sunfloweracademy.com

UBC Lluvia PreschoolVancouver604/822-3353www.childcare.ubc.ca/programs/preschool

University Hill PreschoolVancouver604/228-8610

Vancouver Bilingual PreschoolVancouver604/261-1221www.vancouverbilingual.com

Wesbrook Parent ParticipationPreschoolVancouverinfo@wesbrookpreschool.comwww.wesbrookpreschool.com

Westside Montessori Academy at theItalian Cultural CentreVancouver604/434-9611www.westsidemontessoriacademy.caWestside Montessori Academy, at theItalian Cultural Centre, has been offer-ing Preschool and Elementary classessince 2008. Preschool offers AM andPM classes (full-day is available).Elementary offers; K to Grade 3 (up to Grade 7 by 2015).

Westside Montessori SchoolVancouver604/731-6594www.westsidemontessori.ca

education guide

Le Petit Montessori PreschoolNorth Vancouver604/980-7973

Little Mountain MontessoriPreschool and KindergartenVancouver604/709-9621

Little People Parent ParticipationPreschoolVancouver604/261-2219littlepeople.ca

Marpole Bilingual MontessoriVancouver604/266-1091

Milestone MontessoriDelta604/583-1446www.milestonemontessori.ca

Monkey See Monkey DoMontessoriVancouver778/371-4659www.monkeyseemonkeydo.ca

Montessori Mes Petits PreschoolNorth Vancouver604/980-1102www.ourpreschool.com

Montessori MewsRichmond604/522-1351

Early Foundations Preschool604/444-3773www.dsrf.orgProvides innovative curriculum in asmall class, allowing for highly individ-ualized instruction that helps children(30 months–5 yrs) find, use &strengthen their unique skills & talents.

Ecole Francaise Internationale deVancouver604/924-2457 www.efiv.org

Family Montessori SchoolVancouver604/224-2633604/731-8810www.familymontessori.com

Gatehouse MontessoriWest Vancouver604/925-1437

Harvest Montessori Preschool & DaycareRichmond604/278-6228www.harvestmontessori.net

Inglewood Parent ParticipationPreschoolWest Vancouver604/925-1888www.inglewoodppp.ca

Kids Care PreschoolVancouver604/325-2222

Accepting Wait List Applications for SY 2014-15VANCOUVER BILINGUAL PRESCHOOL949 West 49th Avenue (at Oak St.)Vancouver, BC V5Z 2T1Phone/Fax: 604.261.1221

CELEBRATING 50 YEARS OF EXCELLENCE

GIVE YOUR CHILD THE GIFT OF A SECOND LANGUAGE

The ability to learn languages is highest between birth and age 6. Our French-English preschool program maximizes a child’s natural curiosity and ability to learn a second language during this important window of opportunity.

• Established in 1962 • Caring, experienced & highly qualified bilingual teachers • Bright, extra-spacious classrooms • Private indoor & outdoor play areas • Introduction to French, reading, math, science and nature, music, crafts • Educational field trips

[email protected] • www.vancouverbilingual.com

Approach the process of learning properly and you wind up creating more than hard-working students with good marks; you create motivated, self-assured, independent thinkers who really understand what they learn. That means better grades…on every test, in every subject, and on every report card.

Call today, or visit oxfordlearning.com

Better grades Better report cards Better university

With 7 locations in the Lower Mainland

y y jand on every report caardd..

Call todayy, , oror visitoxfordleleararning.com


education & tutoring servicesAbacus Math Education Inc.778/990-0749www.ucmas.ca

BC Homeschool Association604/536-2233www.bchomeschool.net

Googol Learning604/720-9377www.googolpower.com

Ho Math and Chess Learning Centre604/263-4321www.mathandchess.com/math_chess_education_franchise.html

Kumon800/222-6284www.kumon.com

K12 Plus Learning604/767-0949Quality tutoring services that help stu-dents to improve their academic per-formance in a range of subjects,achieve foundational studying skillsand build confidence. Lessons at ourcenter or your home.

Learning Disabilities Assoc. of BC604/873-8139www.ldav.ca/

Millennium Learning Advantage604/461-3330www.millenniumlearningadvantage.com

MPM Math604/266-6762www.mpmmath.com

School Is Easy TutoringAlso known as Academic Advantage604/439-1790 or 1-877-ITS EASYHome tutoring. We are one of thelargest and most respected tutoringagencies in the Lower Mainland. Weprovide carefully screened certifiedteachers in all subjects: Grades 1–12,ESL (all levels), Special Ed, StudySkills, Gifted Programs and Frenchimmersion. We are easy to work with.Reasonable rates. No upfront fees.Rated A+ with BBB and recipient ofawards.

The New West Homelearner’s Program604/517-5917www.sd40.bc.ca/nwhl

Oxford LearningCoquitlam 604/464-3090 Richmond 604/233-5566South Surrey 604/575-1494Langley 604/534-4089North Van 604/990-8850www.oxfordlearning.comOxford offers personalized programsfor every child, in every grade (K–12).We provide after-school programs to

meet every need from essential skillssuch as reading, math, writing and alsoFrench. Our Little Reader programoffers preschoolers academic programsin a fun environment.

PD Plus Tutoring Service604/421-6101www.pdplustutors.com

The Reading Foundation604/222-2254www.readingfoundation.comThe Reading Foundation is a privateclinic that provides the diagnosis andtreatment of difficulties inreading/spelling, math, comprehension,and written language that affect chil-dren, adolescents and adults. Our one-on-one intervention programs areunique, dynamic and powerful.

Skilled Kids Occupational Therapy778/322-1242www.skilledkids.com

Sylvan Learning1/800-EDUCATEwww.SylvanLearning.caSuccess in school, and in life. Sylvan isthe leading provider of tutoring servic-es to students of all ages and skill lev-els. Our highly personalized approachbuilds skills, habits and attitudes forlife-long success. Reading - Math -Writing - Study Skills

Teachers’ Tutoring Service 604/730-3410www.tutor.bc.ca

TOC Education Resources604/603-3008www.toceducationresources.com

Vancouver Tutoring Service604/922-0900www.vancouvertutoringservice.com

The Whole Dyslexic Society604/921-1084www.dyslexiacanada.com

YT Tutoring 604/STUDENTwww.yttutoring.com

school lunchesPiccolissimo604/836-9931www.piccollissimo.caLet us provide hot healthy lunches foryour child. We cook and deliver thelunches to your child’s school. Visit ourwebsite for details.

education guide

Le français au CSF, c’est bien plus qu’une langue !

Inscrivez votre enfant dans une des écoles publiques du CSF ! Depuis sa création en 1995, le Conseil scolaire francophone de la Colombie-Britannique offre des programmes et des services éducatifs valorisant le plein épanouissement et l’identité culturelle des apprenantes et apprenants francophones de la province. Le conseil compte aujourd’hui plus de 4 700 élèves, 37 écoles publiques et dessert plus d’une centaine de communautés réparties dans l’ensemble de la province.

▪ programme d’enseignement public de la maternelle à la 12e année;▪ services à la petite enfance;▪ service de transport scolaire;▪ programme d’anglais de qualité;

▪ haut niveau de réussite scolaire; ▪ portables pour tous;▪ programmes de musique, théâtre.


as possible. Where have you been?What have you done? What makes youproud? Indulge in “sky-is-the-limit” think -ing and put pen to paper. Let your dreamscome to life on the page.

The most fulfilling experiences are thosethat align with your deeply held personalvalues, says Kashdan. If you feel out oftouch with what matters most or can’tprioritize among many good things,don’t bumble ahead without clarifyingwhat you want. Identify your top valuesand priorities through some serious soul-searching or using psychological tests (seeResources). When you know what youcare most about, it is easier to makechoices about how to spend your mostvaluable currency: time and energy.

Perhaps you know what you want buthaven’t made it happen… yet. Fear mayhave prevented you from setting boldgoals and moving toward them in thepast. Or maybe you put your dreams onhold until the kids are bigger. Delayingyour dreams is a kind of denial. It keepsyou from taking scary risks, but it maylead to regrets, cautions Miller. Studiesshow people are more likely to regretthe things they did not do than toregret risks that didn’t work out. Letyourself be drawn in by the energy ofpossibility. The biggest risks often bringthe biggest rewards.

Making Dreams a RealityResolutions, goals, and personal missionstatements can help you achieve yourdreams. And you should express yourintentions in writing, says Miller. Puttingdreams in writing makes them real andpre-commits you to a course of action.That makes you accountable to yourself,so you will be less likely to forget yourgoals or push them aside when obstaclesarise. Whether you choose to author a

T he fundamental truth ofparenting is that kids growup fast. And so do parents.

Days spent feeding babies and changingdiapers give way to carpool and home-work in the blink of an eye. Before youknow it, you’re mailing college care pack-ages. Time may pass slowly on any givenday. It is the weeks, months, and yearsthat whiz by.

The New Year offers a blank page inyour book of time, brimming with all thepromise and opportunity of what is yet tobe. Now is the time to take stock, re-energize,and forge ahead boldly. Your dreamlife is waiting for you to create it.

What’s Stopping You?How long has it been since you thoughtabout what you really want in life, aboutwhat brings you joy, challenge, and satis-faction? “Parenting is all-consuming,” saysTodd Kashdan, PhD, Associate Professorof Psychology at George Mason Univer -sity and author of Curious? Discover theMissing Ingredient of a Fulfilling Life(2009, Morrow). “We sometimes forgetour own interests and focus exclusivelyon kids’ needs and wants.”

Mothers especially may struggle tofind time for their own development.Studies show women have only41 minutes a day to pursuegoals that matter, says CarolineAdams Miller, MAPP, a Bethesda, Mary -land, life coach and author of CreatingYour Best Life: The Ultimate Life ListGuide (2009, Sterling). It’s no wonder mensurpass women in happiness by their late40s. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

One way to identify areas for growth isto envision your best possible self in greatdetail, suggests Miller. Imagine you arelooking back on your life in your oldage and everything has gone as well

bucket list of “100 things you want to dobefore you die” or to commit to only afew truly audacious goals is up to you.

The best goals are challenging and spe-cific, counsels Miller. A weak goal mightbe to “be more sociable.” A strongergoal would be to “make twelvenew friends in the next sixmonths.” Don’t be tempted to set vagueor easy goals. Achieving mediocre goals willonly make you feel mediocre, says Miller.

Setting and attaining challenging goalsbuilds self-efficacy—the belief that youhave what it takes to accomplish yourdreams. People with strong self-efficacybeliefs are more likely to take action andto be persistent when they encounter set-backs. They have learned from experiencethat hard work pays off. When challengesarise, they redouble their efforts or findalternate paths to their goals. They pos-sess unwavering optimism and grittydetermination. Think of these qualities(optimism, self-efficacy, and determi-nation) as your mental and emotionalmuscles—the more you exercise them,the stronger they become.

Seemingly impossible goals are achiev-able if you break them down into smallersub-goals and then do something toachieve them. Identify specific actionsyou can take to move you closer to yourgoals. Schedule actions on the calen-dar so they don’t take a back seat toeveryday errands. As much as possible,do something every day to move closer toyour goals. Keep a journal, spreadsheet,or star chart to track your progress. Highachievers monitor their growth andchange their approach if they aren’t seeingresults, says Miller.

Your Dream Life Starts NowDon’t wait until you achieve your dreamsto start living fully. With the right atti-

By Heidi Smith Luedtke, Ph.D.

Live Your Life’s Dream


tude, you can fast-track feelings of fulfill-ment. Notice what is going right in your life and be grateful. Write a list of yourblessings, express your appreciation outloud or send thank-you cards and letters. Agrateful attitude boosts your mood and setsa positive tone for growth, says Miller.Practice grateful habits daily.

Be open to exploration, too. When youchoose to approach life with a curious atti-tude, you are energized, attentive, andengaged, says Kashdan. If you are stuck in arut, take a cue from your kids. Seek out newthings. When you hear a song you love,download it. Listen to it over and over ifyou want. Put some new items in your gro-cery cart this week, even if you are unsurehow you’ll cook them. Go online to findrecipes. Collect items that inspire you. Keepthem in a special, secret place. The well-lived life is built from a series of well-livedmoments, says Kashdan.

As you focus on living well, you maybecome impatient with distractions andimpediments. You have to stop spendingtime with people who are energy vampires,Kashdan says. Emotions are contagious.Surround yourself with people who giveyou energy and self-confidence.

This year, set impossible goals. Takeconcrete action steps toward their ful-fillment. Be afraid—on a regularbasis, Miller encourages. Your dream lifeis right there, just beyond your comfortzone.

Heidi Smith Luedtke is a personality psychologist and mom oftwo. She shares psychology lessons for real life at heidiluedtke.com

Creating a life you love requires inspiration, introspection, andaction. These resources will help with all three.

• Be inspired by Randy Pausch’s last lecture, “Really achieving your childhood dreams.”

www.cmu.edu/uls/journeys/randy-pausch/index.html or The Last Lecture (Jeffrey

Zaslow and Randy Pausch, 2008)

• Read memoirs of gritty high-achievers. Mary Kay Ash (Mary Kay; 1981), Lance

Armstrong (It’s Not about the Bike; 2000), and Abigail Thomas, (A Three Dog Life; 2006)

are inspirational.

• Uncover your values, priorities, and traits using psychological tests. Curious? Discover

the Missing Ingredient to a Fulfilling Life (Todd Kashdan, 2009) or www.authentic

happiness.com

• Create life lists aided by exercises for reflection and refinement. Creating Your Best

Life: The Ultimate Life List Guide (Caroline Adams Miller and Michael B. Frisch, 2009)

• Author and share a bucket list online. www.superviva.com

• Engineer and track your personal development with these cool tools.

www.happinessprojecttoolbox.com

All Childrenshould Have a Complete

Eye Exam by Age 3

DR. DELLA CHOW

2589 WEST BROADWAY (KITSILANO)

OPEN MONDAY TO SATURDAY

Our child friendly office has a great kids play area!

742.3937WWW.DELLAOPTIQUE.COM


fer from depression, and women with chil-dren at home are particularly vulnerable.The demands on our time are overwhelmingand the expectations we have of ourselvesnever end. Our “quick-fix” society looks tomedication as the answer, without consider-ing the positive effects exercise can have andthe negative effects of many medications.

A study by Duke psychologist JamesBlu menthal, as presented in The Archives ofInternal Medicine (October 1999) notesthat, “A brisk 30-minute walk or jog aroundthe track three times a week may be just aseffective in relieving the symptoms of majordepression as the standard treatment ofanti-depressant medications.” When inter-viewed, Dr. Blumenthal further states that,“Almost one-third of depressed patients ingeneral do not respond to medications, andfor others, the medications can cause un -wanted side effects. Exercise should be con-

recent doctor visit promptedmy physician to routinely pena prescription after listening

to my complaints. A major life change,combined with naturally-occurring hor-monal changes, had resulted in feelings ofanxiety and depression I couldn’t brush off.It surprised me, however, that I heard nomention of the benefits of exercise or how itmight help me stay off medication if I choseto try that route first. As a seasoned runner,I knew a more consistent exercise routinemight be the prescription I needed instead.

Exercise has long been recognized for itspositive effects in preventing high bloodpressure, obesity, diabetes, and a host ofother diseases. But now, a growing body ofresearch indicates that exercise can improvesymptoms of depression and anxiety, some-times reducing the need for medication.

Women are twice as likely as men to suf-

sidered a viable option.” In a follow-upstudy the next year with the same patients,researchers found that continued exercisegreatly reduced the risk of depression re -turning, with only 8% of the patients in theexercise group relapsing.

Exercise also has positive effects on anxi-ety and its symptoms. Anxiety disorders arethe most common mental illnesses in theUnited States and are steadily rising, withan estimated 40 million adults affected.Anxiety symptoms can be relieved witheven short bursts of aerobic exercise. Myfriend, Hope, suffered from anxiety andpanic attacks for many years. Her symp-toms masked those of a heart attack, includ-ing heart palpitations, shortness of breath,heavy pressure on her chest, and faintingspells. With three young children at home,she says, “I felt like I was on the verge of anervous breakdown.” Upon seeing her doc-tor, she began taking medication to controlthe symptoms. She later started an exerciseroutine and says, “After three weeks of exer-cising, I was able to completely come off themedicine I was taking.” However, when shequit exercising she fell into a deep depres-sion. She resumed exercising and now en -joys playing tennis and working out at thegym to maintain a healthy state of mind,without the need for medication.

Exercise also acts as a buffer againststress, giving you a feeling of control in yourlife as you rid yourself of negative emotionsand assume a more relaxed mood, capableof combating the problems you’re dealingwith. Dr. Steven Aldana in The Culprit andthe Cure equates exercise to “a combinationof psychotherapy, physical therapy, and stressmanagement—all concentrated in one 30-minute session.” He reports on a review of34 studies that “showed that sedentary indi-viduals who started engaging in physicalactivity had a more subdued response tostressful situations.” And when we respondbetter to stress, we are less likely to experi-

By Gayla Grace


ence the negative effects of stress, includinghigh blood pressure, lack of sleep, or diges-tive problems to name a few.

So, how much exercise do we need tohelp us feel better? Research suggests thataerobic activity for at least 30 minutes a day,three to five days a week, is necessary toreally make a difference with symptoms ofdepression, anxiety, or stress. But even exercise in smaller amounts, such as a ten-minute walk during your lunch break, canlift your mood in the short term.

After returning from my doctor visit, Icommitted to a more consistent exerciseroutine. I told my family that prioritizingmy health was important to me and myneed for exercise might come before theirneeds on occasion. I began combining myexercise of choice: running, with strengthtraining classes twice a week, and found therelief I needed, physically and emotionally,to combat my symptoms.

Not all health challenges can be over-come without prescription medicine. Exer -cise should be considered a viable option forbetter health, however, and particularly use-ful with bouts of anxiety and depressionthat women commonly struggle with.Finding the exercise routine that works foryou could be the most important decisionyou make toward a healthier you, physicallyand emotionally, year after year.

Gayla Grace is a freelance writer and wife and mom/step-mom to five children. She enjoys exercising regularly to stay emo-tionally and physically healthy.

Exercise is a combination of

psychotherapy, physicaltherapy, and stressmanagement—all

concentrated in one 30-minute session.

Unleash your child’s creativity!Visual, media and performing arts classes available for ages 2–19, all skill levels, in Vancouver and Surrey. Classes start April 1!

photo by Kyoko Fierro

www.artsumbrella.com

Arts Umbrella supporters include:

Christopher Foundation, Darrell & David Mindell, Hemlock Printers Ltd., Teck Resources Ltd.

SPRING BREAK

PROGRAMS

AVAILABLE!


D espite ever-increasing responsibilities, thereare no promotions in motherhood. You’llnever get an annual review followed by a fat

bonus and a healthy raise. There’s a once-a-year dayof gratitude, but the rest of the time we take ourprops where we can. It is not enough that we (almost)singlehandedly grew an entire human being insideour bodies and then managed to keep the little sucker(literally) alive in the face of deadly car seats and cribbars. We value what we can quantify as credit for ajob well done.

I earned a gold star for my daughter’s birthweight. Despite a carefully constructed birth plan, anancient Korean midwife’s fetal turning technique,and my doula’s soothing-sounds-of-the-snow-owlCD, my second child, a precious flannel bundle, hadto be pried out of me under anesthesia—with a bigknife. She was born gray with an Apgar score of one,and nearly killed us both.

Why? She was a ten-pound baby, that’s why. Ten.Okay, 9 pounds 141/2 ounces. I embellished, but

when you have a baby that big you’re allowed toround up. An ounce and a half isn’t an exaggeration;it’s a shot of tequila. (Which may have taken the edgeoff the cheese-grater-on-nipple sensation of breast-feeding.) I’m just saying, it wasn’t a big fib. From DayOne, my daughter was a 10-pound baby. For the lastdecade, all my kick-ass-ness as a mother has beenimplicit when I casually mention, “That one? Tenpounds.”

Okay, just under ten pounds. Who’s counting?I would have perpetuated the legend indefinitely,

but on her tenth birthday my daughter asked to lookat her baby book. This couldn’t go well. Surely she’dnotice her book consisted of a few good pages, fol-lowed by a few more of random baby items, and thentwo-dozen blanks. I figured as long as we didn’t breakout the meticulous record of Big Brother’s first yearfor a side-by-side comparison, she might never knowthat she was conceived primarily as a playmate forour favorite child.

I shouldn’t have worried. All she wanted to see washer birth certificate. My husband and I beamed overher shoulder as she flipped through the handful ofpages devoted to her first days. Then the troublestarted. There on the first page of the sub-standardbaby book was her birth announcement, the one Ihad created with my own breast milk-stained fingers.

“Do you see what I see?” I asked my husband.“What?””“Eight pounds fourteen ounces? What is that?”“What?”

“She weighed ten pounds! Ten! Well, you know,nine fourteen.”

Like all smart husbands faced with an unwinnablesituation, he shrugged.

How could I have made such a mistake? As Ipaged through the official documentation, a ten-pound knot formed in my stomach. The hospitalrecord of birth, her crib identification card, and thedoula’s notes all confirmed her actual birth weight: 8pounds 141/2 ounces.

She wasn’t just under ten pounds at all. She wasjust under nine pounds. Nine. This fact would notreconcile with my myth. I was a five-foot-one She-Ra,a warrior among women, a ten-pound babymaker!

Now what was I? Just over average? Big deal. Andit wasn’t just about me. My daughter had bought intomy heavy white lie, too. The thought of her infantself as bigger than the rest had built up her self-imageas a tough girl, maybe even helped her become thebest defenseman on her ice hockey team. The factspresented in that stupid baby book shattered all that.

“You mean I wasn’t ten pounds?”My daughter looked like I’d just wiped out the

entire balance of her iTunes account.“I don’t care what it says,” my husband told her.

“You’ll always be a ten pounder to me.” He glancedin my direction. “And don’t worry, Babe. Your secret’ssafe.”

So, the legend lives on, but somehow I don’t feelright about keeping that gold star.

Lela Davidson is a freelance writer and the author of Blacklisted from thePTA, a collection of irreverent essays about motherhood and the modern family.http://leladavidson.com/

The Legend of my Ten-Pound BabyBy Lela Davidson


Winner can choose thecolor and size (nb–3m,3m–6m and 6m–12m).From the initial launchingof luxury eco bedding line,Silkberry Baby™ hasexpanded its designs toinclude baby clothing,hand knit crochet hats andbooties and accessories.With the modern, eco-conscious parent in mind,we designed organic bamboo and silk products.The result: super soft anduniquely designed prod-ucts that your little onesare sure to love, with acute and trendy look, aswell as being practical andfunctional for busy moms.www.silkberry.com

Win a bambooshort sleeveromper fromSilkberry

Visit www.bcparent.ca to enter Contest ends March 5th

Visit www.bcparent.caRead our new blogs… catch

up on past issues… enterour contests and find out

about great family events inthe Lower Mainland.

Have BC ParentNewsmagazine delivered

directly to your inbox. Visit bcparent.ca to

subscribe.

FUN IN PRESENTING,

CONFIDENCE IN SPEAKING, SKILLS FOR LIFE

K-12 Private Speech Arts Classes

Call For Information 778-323-2448West Vancouver

www.vivavocespeech.com

LITTLE SMILES DENTAL CENTRE

Dr. Jong Hyun BanDDS, FRCD(C)

Certified Specialist inPediatric Dentistry

3770 West 10th AveVancouver, BC

Let your child’s dental visit be a positive experience.

Prevention andmaintenance of good oral health is our focus.

www.thelittlesmiles.com (604) 222-2206

TAP JAZZ BALLET Hip Hop

3673 W. 4th Ave � 604-736-1000

www.westsidedance.ca


W hy did I have to see that when I peered out from my in-laws’ patio on Christmas morning? It could have beenanything, a rambunctious squirrel, a trespassing dog, or

low-flying vultures. Instead I saw a teenage girl run across my in-laws’ backyard to the rear window of her house. She paused at awindow and looked toward the street. She blew two kisses to, I’mguessing, the friend who dropped her off. Then she carefully liftedthe window from the outside,crawled into her house, andclosed the window and blindsbehind her.

As a parent, I had trou-ble swallowing what I hadjust witnessed. If my daugh-ter was sneaking out of thehouse for who knows whatkind of get together, I’dwant to know about it. I’dcertainly rather deal with itnow than 9 months laterwhen there could be addi-tional issues. However, Ididn’t know the people, andwouldn’t want to causetrouble between my in-lawsand their new neighbors. Idecided to mind my ownbusiness—yet, I couldn’t getit out of my head.

About an hour later, Iwas helping my 8-year-olddaughter, Jessie, with hernew purple dress. As I but-toned it up in the back andtied the bow around herwaist, I flashed back to theteenage girl I had seen earli-er that morning. It feels likeI was just changing Jessie’sdiaper. Now she’s wearing size 10 dresses and stands as tall as hermother’s chin. I felt it was time for a talk. No, not “the talk” as hermother, Mattie, would cover that one. This one I could handle. Itold Jessie that she must never sneak out of the house window. Herresponse didn’t put me completely at ease, though I accepted it. Shesaid “I’ll check with Momma.” Maybe she knows that Dad will say“No” more quickly when it comes to dating decisions.

Later on Christmas Day, Jessie opened a special gift—a pair of

roller skates. The next day we went to the park to break them in.Mattie was on one side holding her hand while I was a steady forceon the other side. Even though Jessie had on her helmet and elbowand knee pads, it was still stressful for me. We went back to the parkto practice again on the following two days. Jessie improved drasti-cally each day. On the third day, Mattie just watched while I heldmy daughter’s hand. Then Jessie said it. “Daddy, you need to let

go.” Reluctantly, I releasedher hand but remainedwithin catching distance be -hind her. Mattie’s brother,who was with us, laughed atme as I zoomed in ready forthe catch each time Jessieflailed her arms. His laughterdidn’t bother me though,because I was right where Ineeded to be.

Later, I again thoughtabout the teenage girl in thewindow, knowing that Jes -sie’s teenage years aren’t thatfar away. I realize that more“letting go” times are ahead.I also know it’s not possibleto catch all the falls. I’mhoping that because I stoodbeside Jessie when shelearn ed to skate, and formany of the other impor-tant times of her childhood,that I’ll never have to standguard outside her bedroomwindow.

I’ve concluded that par-enting requires seeing yourchild through a series ofwheels—stroller, wagon, tri -

cycle, training, bicycle, scoot -er, and now roller skate wheels. I’m going to enjoy the pink skatewheels stage to the fullest. Something tells me that seeing Jessiebehind the wheel of a car will be much harder. When that timecomes, I’ll be beside her in the front seat. Then it will be time forDaddy to let go again, and Mattie and I will find ourselves peeringout the window, waiting for her safe return home.

Patrick Hempfing a stay-at-home dad and write a monthly column called moMENts for Mo -ments Magazine. He writes about the joys and challenges of parenting from a “Mr. Mom” perspective.

Windows and WheelsBy Patrick Hempfing


Ballet BCintroduces The

National Ballet ofChina in Swan

Lake presented by Teck at the

Queen ElizabethTheatre fromFebruary 27–

March 2, 2013 for four evening

performances at 8:00 pm.

www.balletbc.com

Enter at www.bcparent.ca Contest ends Feb 20th

FOR MORE INFORMATION,INCLUDING A VIDEO, VISIT

www.pollockclinics.com

OFFICES IN VANCOUVER AND NEW WESTMINISTER

604 –717–6200

VASECTOMY No-Scalpel No-Needle No Metal Clips

T R U S T O U R E X P E R I E N C E !Dr. Pollock has safely performed over 15,000 vasectomies.

FOR INFANT CIRCUMCISION, VISIT www.circumcisionvancouver.com

• Takes under 6 minutes• Virtually painless• BC’s most referred to

vasectomy physician(10+ years)

• Our Success rate is greater than 99.9%.

• Online registration saves youtime – have a consultation and vasectomy in a single visit.

Coming April 15th

12th Annual Family Resource GuideHave your business listed in BC’s

favourite resource for parents

LISTINGS INCLUDE:EDUCATION � CLASSES AND PROGRAMS � FAMILY

FUN � RETAIL � SUMMER CAMPS � BIRTHDAYSHOME � FAMILY HEALTH AND SUPPORT SERVICES

Don’t miss your opportunity to have your company included in this year’s guide.

For advertising and listing information

EMAIL: [email protected]

OR VISIT: www.bcparent.ca

On the stands April 15th, 2013 (Advertising deadline March 10th)

To view current issuevisit www.bcparent.ca

bc parent winter 2013 edition

Documents

winter issue

winter education guide16

teaching kids tosee

childneeds encouragement

differentthan praise

lifes dreamit

gold distributioncontributors

mail address