AwarenessItself

TheTeachingsof

AjaanFuangJotiko

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ThanissaroBhikkhu(GeoffreyDeGraff)

2

copyr ight 1993thanissarobhikkhu, secondedi t ion2005

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Introduction

AjaanFuangJotiko,myteacher,wasbornin1915toasmallfarmingfamilyintheprovinceofChanthaburi,neartheCambodianborderofsoutheasternThailand.Orphanedattheageofeleven,hewasraisedinaseriesofmonasteriesandreceivedordinationasamonkwhenheturnedtwenty.Ashebegantostudythemonasticdiscipline,though,herealizedthatthemonksofhismonasterywerenotreallyseriousaboutpracticingtheBuddha’steachings,andhelongedtofindateacherwhowouldgivehimatrainingmoreinlinewithwhathehadread.Hischancecameduringhissecondyearasamonk,whenAjaanLeeDhammadharo,amemberoftheforestascetictraditionfoundedbyAjaanMunBhuridatto,cametosetupameditationmonasteryinanoldcemeteryjustoutsideofChanthaburi.TakenwithAjaanLee’steachings,AjaanFuangreordainedinthesecttowhichAjaanLeebelongedandjoinedhimathisnewmonastery.

Fromthatpointonward,withfewexceptions,hespenteveryRainsRetreatunderAjaanLee’sguidanceuntilthelatter’sdeathin1961.Oneoftheexceptionswasafive-yearperiodhespentduringWorldWarII,meditatingaloneintheforestsofnorthernThailand.Anotherwasasix-yearperiodintheearlyfiftieswhenAjaanLeeleftAjaanFuanginchargeoftheChanthaburimonasteryandwanderedaboutvariouspartsofThailandinpreparationforfindingaplacetosettledownnearBangkok.Whenin1957AjaanLeefoundedWatAsokaram,hisnewmonasterynearBangkok,AjaanFuangjoinedhimthere,tohelpinwhatwastobethelastmajorprojectofAjaanLee’slife.

AfterAjaanLee’sdeath,AjaanFuangwasgenerallyexpectedtobecomeabbotatWatAsokaram.Themonasterybythattime,though,hadgrownintosuchalarge,unwieldycommunitythathedidnotwanttheposition.Soin1965,whentheSupremePatriarchofThailand,inresidenceatWatMakutKasatriyaram(TheTempleoftheKing’sCrown)inBangkok,askedhimtospendtheRainsRetreatathistemple,toteachmeditationtohimandtoanyoftheothermonksatthetemplewhowereinterested,AjaanFuangjumpedatthechance.

HespentatotalofthreeRainsRetreatsatWatMakut,wanderingaboutthecountrysidelookingforsolitudeduringthedryseasons.AlthoughhehadimmenserespectfortheSupremePatriarchasanindividual,hegrewtiredofthepolitickinghesawatthehigherecclesiasticallevelsandsobeganlookingforawayout.Itcamein1968,whenawomannamedKhunNaiSombuunRyangrit

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donatedlandtothePatriarchforasmallmonasteryinamountainousregionnearthecoastofRayongprovince,notfarfromChanthaburi.AjaanFuangvolunteeredtospendtimeatthenewmonastery,WatDhammasathit,untilapermanentabbotcouldbefound.Themonastery,though,wasinaverypoorareawherethelocalpeoplewerenotenthusiasticabouttheideaofastrictmeditationmonasteryintheirmidst,sonoonecouldbefoundtotakeonthepositionofabbot.Thus,shortlybeforetheSupremePatriarch’sdeathinacaraccidentin1971,AjaanFuangacceptedthepositionofabbotatWatDhammasathithimself.

ItwassoonafterthisthatIfirstmethim,inAprilof1974.WatDhammasathithadthelookofasummercampdownonitsluck:threemonkslivinginthreesmallhuts,alean-towheretheywouldeattheirmeals,akitchenwithroomforacoupleofnuns,andasmallwoodenstructureontopofthehill—whereIstayed—whichhadaviewoftheseaofftothesouth.Thelandhadbeendonatedshortlyafterafirehadstrippeditofallitsvegetation,andthehillsideswerecoveredmostlywithcogongrass.Yearlyfiresstillsweptthroughthearea,preventingtreesfromtakinghold,althoughtheareaonthemountainabovethemonasterywascoveredwithathick,malarialforest.

Inspiteofthepoorconditions,AjaanFuangseemedtohaveaclear-eyed,down-to-earthwisdomthatallowedhimtotranscendhissurroundings—aninnerpeace,happiness,andstabilitythatIenviedandadmired.Afterspendingafewmonthspracticingmeditationunderhisguidance,IreturnedtoAmericaandthenfoundmywaybacktoThailandinthefallof1976tobeordainedasamonkandtobegintrainingunderhiminearnest.

Inmyabsence,hehadbeguntodevelopasmallbutdevotedfollowingoflaymeditators.Inearly1976thenewabbotofWatMakuthadinvitedhimbacktoteachthereonaregularbasis,andfortherestofhislife—untilhisdeathin1986—hesplithistimeevenlybetweenBangkokandRayong.MostofhisstudentscamefromtheprofessionalclassesofBangkok,peoplewhowereturningtomeditationforspiritualstrengthandsolaceinthefaceofthefast-changingpressuresofmodernThaiurbansociety.

DuringmyfirstyearsbackinRayong,themonasterywasanincrediblyquietandsecludedplace,withonlyahandfulofmonksandalmostnovisitors.Firelaneshadbeguntoholdthefiresincheck,andanewforestwasdeveloping.Thequietatmospherebegantochange,though,inthefallof1979,whenconstructionbeganonachediatthetopofthehill.Becausethechediwasbeingbuiltalmostentirelywithvolunteerlabor,everyonewasinvolved—monks,laypeoplefromBangkok,andlocalvillagers.

AtfirstIresentedthedisruptionofthemonastery’squietroutine,butIbegan

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tonoticesomethinginteresting:Peoplewhoneverwouldhavethoughtofmeditatingwerehappytohelpwiththeweekendconstructionbrigades;duringbreaksinthework,whentheregularswouldgopracticemeditationwithAjaanFuang,thenewcomerswouldjoininandsoontheytoowouldbecomeregularmeditatorsaswell.Inthemeantime,Ibeganlearningtheimportantlessonofhowtomeditateinthemidstoflessthanidealconditions.AjaanFuanghimselftoldmethatalthoughhepersonallydislikedconstructionwork,therewerepeoplehehadtohelp,andthiswastheonlywayhecouldgettothem.Soonafterthechediwasfinishedin1982,workbeganonalargeBuddhaimagethatwastohaveanordinationhallinitsbase,andagain,asworkprogressedontheimage,moreandmorepeoplewhocametohelpwiththeworkweredrawntomeditation.

AjaanFuang’shealthdeterioratedsteadilyinhislateryears.AmildskinconditionhehaddevelopedduringhisstayatWatMakutgrewintoafull-blowncaseofpsoriasis,andnomedicine—Western,Thai,orChinese—couldofferacure.Still,hemaintainedanexhaustingteachingschedule,althoughherarelygavesermonstolargegroupsofpeople.Instead,hepreferredtoteachonanindividualbasis.Hisfavoritewayofgettingpeoplestartedinmeditationwastomeditatetogetherwiththem,guidingthemthroughtheinitialroughspots,andthenhavethemmeditatemoreandmoreontheirown,makingwayfornewbeginners.Evenduringhisworstattacksofpsoriasis,hewouldhavetimetoinstructpeopleonapersonalbasis.Asaresult,hisfollowing—thoughrelativelysmallcomparedtothatofAjaanLeeandotherfamousmeditationteachers—wasintenselyloyal.

InMay,1986,afewdaysaftertheBuddhaimagewascompleted,butbeforetheordinationhallinitsbasewasfinished,AjaanFuangflewtoHongKongtovisitastudentwhohadsetupameditationcenterthere.Suddenly,onthemorningofMay14,whilehewassittinginmeditation,hesufferedaheartattack.Thestudentcalledanambulanceassoonasherealizedwhathadhappened,butAjaanFuangwaspronounceddeadonarrivalatthehospital.

Becausehehadrequestedafewyearsearlierthathisbodynotbecremated,plansbeganimmediatelytobuildhimamausoleum.Iwasgiventhetaskofassemblinghisbiographyandanytape-recordedtalksthatmightbetranscribedandpublishedasacommemorativevolume.Ifound,tomyamazement,thatIknewmoreabouthislifethananyoneelse.Thepeoplewithwhomhehadlivedwhenhewasyoungerhadeitherdiedorgrownsooldthattheirmemorieswerefailingthem.Allofasuddentheanecdoteshehadtoldmeduringmyfirstyearsbackwithhim—ofhisyouthandhisyearswithAjaanLee—becamethesubstanceofhisbiography.HowmuchIprobablymissed,giventhefactthatmyabilitiesinThaiandfamiliaritywithThaiculturewerestilldeveloping,was

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disconcertingtothinkabout.

Evenmoredisconcertingwastodiscoverhowlittleofhisteachingswereleftforposterity.Ordinarily,herefusedtoletpeopletape-recordhisinstructions,ashemaintainedthathisteachingswereintendedforthepeoplelisteningtoputintopracticerightthenandthere,andmightbewrongforotherpeopleatotherstagesintheirpractice.Thefewtapesthatweremadecamefromsimple,introductorytalksthathegavetofirst-timevisitorswhohadcometogiveagroupdonationtothemonastery,ortopeoplewhowerejustgettingstartedinmeditation.Nothingofamoreadvancednaturewasontape.

Soafterweprintedthecommemorativevolume,Istartedaprojectofmyown,writingdownwhatIcouldrememberofhisteachingsandinterviewinghisotherstudentsforsimilarmaterial.Theinterviewingtookmorethantwoyearsandinvolvedafairamountofeditingtoextractteachingsthatwouldbehelpfulforpeopleingeneralandwouldworkinawrittenformat.Theresultwasasmallbookentitled,TheLanguageoftheHeart.Then,shortlybeforeIreturnedtotheStatestohelpstartamonasteryinCalifornia,anotherAjaanFuangtapewasfound,asermoninwhichhewasgivingmoreadvancedinstructionstooneofhisstudents.Itranscribeditandarrangedtohaveitprintedasasmallbookletnamed,TranscendentDiscernment.

Thebookyouareholdinginyourhandisdrawnfromthesethreebooks.MostofthematerialcomesfromTheLanguageoftheHeart,althoughpartsofthatbookhadtobecuteitherbecausetheyreferredtoincidentspeculiartoThaiculture,orbecausethepunsandwordplaymadethemuntranslatable.AjaanFuanglovedplayingwithlanguage—hissenseofhumorwasoneofthefirstthingsthatattractedmetohim—andmanyofhismemorablesayingswerememorableforjustthatreason.Unfortunately,mostofthesepassageslosetheirimpactontranslation,andtheexplanationstheywouldrequiremightquicklybecometedious,soIhaveomittednearlyallofthem,leavinginafew—suchasthe“litter”story—togiveatasteofhiswaywithwords.

InadditiontothepassagesfromTheLanguageoftheHeart,IhaveincludedalmostallofTranscendentDiscernmentalongwithhighlightsfromthecommemorativevolume.Noteverythingisastraighttranslationfromthesebooks,forinsomecasesIhavehadtoretelltheanecdotestomakethemmoreaccessibletoaWesternreader.Ihavebeencarefulthroughout,though,totranslatethemessageofAjaanFuang’sownwordsasexactlyaspossible.

Inputtingthisbooktogether,Ihavehadtheopportunitytoreflectonthestudent/teacherrelationshipasitexistsinThailand,andinAjaanFuang’sdealingswithhisdisciples,bothlayandordained.Heprovidedanatmosphereofwarmthandrespectinwhichhisstudentscoulddiscusswithhimtheparticular

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problemsoftheirlivesandmindswithoutbeingmadetofeellikepatientsorclients,butsimplyasfellowhumanbeingstowhomhewasofferingasolidreferencepointfortheirlives.SincecomingtotheWest,IfindthatthissortofrelationshipissadlylackingamongusandIhopethatasBuddhismbecomesestablishedhere,thissortofrelationshipwillbecomeestablishedaswell,forthesakeofthementalandspiritualhealthofoursocietyasawhole.

AgroupofThaipeopleonceaskedmewhatwasthemostamazingthingIhadeverencounteredinAjaanFuang,hopingthatIwouldmentionhismind-readingabilitiesorothersupernaturalpowers.Althoughtherewerethose—hisknowledgeofmymindseemeduncanny—ItoldthemthatwhatIfoundmostamazingwashiskindnessandhumanity:Inallouryearstogether,hehadnevermademefeelthatIwasaWesternerorthathewasaThai.Ourcommunicationwasalwaysonadirect,person-to-personlevelthatbypassedculturaldifferences.Iknowthatmanyofhisotherstudents,althoughtheywouldnothavephrasedtheissuequitethisway,sensedthesamequalityinhim.

IofferthisbookasawayofsharingsomeofwhatIlearnedfromAjaanFuang,anddedicateit,withdeepestrespect,tohismemory.Heoncetoldmethatifithadn’tbeenforAjaanLee,hewouldneverhaveknownthebrightnessoflife.Iowethesamedebttohim.

Note:Forthisnew,revisededition,Ihavereinstatedthesectionentitled“Merit”,mostofwhichwasomittedfromthefirsteditionin1993.

ThanissaroBhikkhu(GeoffreyDeGraff)

MettaForestMonasteryValleyCenter,CA92082-1409June,2005

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MindWhatYouSay

§Normally,AjaanFuangwasamanoffewwordswhospokeinresponsetocircumstances:Ifthecircumstanceswarrantedit,hecouldgivelong,detailedexplanations.Ifnot,he’dsayonlyawordortwo—orsometimesnothingatall.HeheldbyAjaanLee’sdictum:“Ifyou’regoingtoteachtheDhammatopeople,butthey’renotintentonlistening,ornotreadyforwhatyouhavetosay,thennomatterhowfantastictheDhammayou’retryingtoteach,itstillcountsasidlechatter,becauseitdoesn’tserveanypurpose.”

§Iwasconstantlyamazedathiswillingness—sometimeseagerness—toteachmeditationevenwhenhewasill.Heexplainedtomeonce,“Ifpeoplearereallyintentonlistening,IfindthatI’mintentonteaching,andnomatterhowmuchIhavetosay,itdoesn’ttiremeout.Infact,IusuallyendupwithmoreenergythanwhenIstarted.Butifthey’renotintentonlistening,thenIgetwornoutafterthesecondorthirdword.”

§“Beforeyousayanything,askyourselfwhetherit’snecessaryornot.Ifit’snot,don’tsayit.Thisisthefirststepintrainingthemind—forifyoucan’thaveanycontroloveryourmouth,howcanyouexpecttohaveanycontroloveryourmind?”

§Sometimeshiswayofbeingkindwastobecross—althoughhehadhisownwayofdoingit.Heneverraisedhisvoiceorusedharshlanguage,butstillhiswordscouldburnrightintotheheart.OnceIcommentedonthisfact,andaskedhim,“Whyisitthatwhenyourwordshurt,theygorighttotheheart?”Heanswered,“That’ssoyou’llremember.Ifwordsdon’thithomewiththepersonlistening,theydon’thithomewiththepersonspeaking,either.”

§Inbeingcrosswithhisstudents,he’dtakehiscuefromhowearnestthestudentwas.Themoreearnest,themorecriticalhe’dbe,withthethoughtthatthissortofstudentwouldusehiswordstobesteffect.Oncealaystudentofhis—whodidn’tunderstandthispoint—washelpingtolookafterhimwhenhewasillinBangkok.Eventhoughshetriedherbesttoattendtohisneeds,hewasconstantlycriticizingher,tothepointwhereshewasthinkingofleavinghim.Itsohappened,though,thatanotherlaystudentcametovisit,andAjaanFuangsaidinapassingremarktohim,“Whenateacher

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criticizeshisstudents,it’sforoneoftworeasons:eithertomakethemstayortomakethemgo.”

Thefirststudent,onoverhearingthis,suddenlyunderstood,andsodecidedtostay.

§AstorythatAjaanFuanglikedtotell—withhisowntwist—wastheJatakataleoftheturtleandtheswans.

Oncethereweretwoswanswholikedtostopbyacertainpondeverydayforadrinkofwater.Astimepassed,theystruckupafriendshipwithaturtlewholivedinthepond,andtheystartedtellinghimaboutsomeofthemanythingstheysawwhileflyingaroundupintheair.Theturtlewasfascinatedwiththeirstories,butafterawhilebegantofeelverydepressed,becauseheknewhe’dneverhaveachancetoseethegreatwideworldthewaytheswansdid.Whenhementionedthistothem,theysaid,“Why,that’snoproblematall.We’llfindawaytotakeyouupwithus.”Sotheygotastick.Themaleswantookoneendofthestickinhismouth,thefemaletooktheotherendinhers,andtheyhadtheturtleholdonwithitsmouthtothemiddle.Wheneverythingwasready,theytookoff.Astheyflewupintothesky,theturtlegottoseemany,manythingshehadneverdreamedaboutontheearthbelow,andwashavingthetimeofhislife.Whentheyflewoveravillage,though,somechildrenplayingbelowsawthem,andstartedshouting,“Look!Swanscarryingaturtle!Swanscarryingaturtle!”Thisspoiledeverythingfortheturtle,untilhethoughtofasmartretort:“No.Theturtle’scarryingtheswans!”Butassoonasheopenedhismouthtosayit,hefellstraighttohisdeathbelow.

Themoralofthestory:“Watchoutforyourmouthwhenyouenterhighplaces.”

§“Litter”isThaislangforidlechatter,andonceAjaanFuangusedthetermtodramaticeffect.

IthappenedoneeveningwhenhewasteachinginBangkok.Threeyoungwomenwhowerelong-timefriendshappenedtoshowuptogetheratthebuildingwherehewasteaching,butinsteadofjoiningthegroupthatwasalreadymeditating,theyfoundthemselvesanout-of-the-waycornertocatchuponthelatestgossip.Astheywerebusytalking,theydidn’tnoticethatAjaanFuanghadgottenuptostretchhislegsandwaswalkingrightpastthem,withanunlitcigaretteinhismouthandaboxofmatchesinhishand.Hestoppedforasecond,litamatch,andinsteadoflightinghiscigarette,tossedthelitmatchintothemiddleoftheirgroup.Immediatelytheyjumpedup,andoneofthemsaid,“ThanPhaw!Whydidyoudothat?Youjustbarelymissedme!”

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“Isawapileoflitterthere,”heanswered,“andfeltIshouldsetfiretoit.”

§OnedayAjaanFuangoverheardtwostudentstalking,oneofthemaskingaquestionandtheotherstartinghisanswerwith,“Well,itseemstome...”ImmediatelyAjaanFuangcuthimoff:“Ifyoudon’treallyknow,sayyoudon’tknow,andleaveitatthat.Whygospreadingyourignorancearound?”

§“Weeachhavetwoearsandonemouth—whichshowsthatweshouldgivemoretimetolistening,andlesstospeaking.”

§“Whateverhappensinthecourseofyourmeditation,don’ttellittoanyoneexceptyourteacher.Ifyougotellingotherpeople,it’sbragging.Andisn’tthatadefilement?”

§“Whenpeopleadvertisehowgoodtheyare,they’rereallyadvertisinghowstupidtheyare.”

§“Ifsomething’sreallygood,youdon’thavetoadvertise.”

§Thailandhasanumberofmonkmagazines,somewhatlikemovie-starmagazines,whichprintthelifestoriesandteachingsoffamousandnot-so-famousmonks,nuns,andlaymeditationteachers.Thelifestoriestendtobesoheavilyembellishedwithsupernaturalandmiraculousevents,though,thattheyarehardtotakeseriously.Fromtheoccasionalcontacthehadwiththeeditorsandreportersresponsibleforthesemagazines,AjaanFuangfeltthat,byandlarge,theirprimaryaimsweremercenary.Asheputit,“ThegreatmeditationteacherswentintothewildsandputtheirlivesonthelineinordertofindtheDhamma.Whentheyfoundit,theyoffereditfreeofchargeontheirreturn.Butthesepeoplesitintheirair-conditionedoffices,writedownwhatevercomesintotheirheads,andthenputitupforsale.”Asaresult,henevercooperatedwiththemwhentheytriedtoputhimintheirmagazines.

OnceagroupofreportersfromamagazinenamedPeopleBeyondtheWorldcametovisithim,armedwithcamerasandtaperecorders.Afterpayingtheirrespects,theyaskedforhisprawat,orpersonalhistory.NowitsohappensthattheThaiwordprawatcanalsomeanpolicerecord,soAjaanFuangrespondedthathedidn’thaveone,ashehadneverdoneanythingwrong.Butthereporterswerenoteasilydiscouraged.Ifhedidn’twanttogivehislifestory,theysaid,couldhepleaseatleastteachthemsomeDhamma.Thisisarequestnomonkcanrefuse,soAjaanFuangtoldthemtoclosetheireyesandmeditateonthewordbuddho—awake.Theyturnedontheirtaperecordersandthensatinmeditation,waitingforaDhammatalk,andthiswaswhattheyheard:

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“That’stoday’sDhamma:twowords—bud-anddho.Nowifyoucan’tkeepthesetwowordsinmind,itwouldbeawasteoftimetoteachyouanythingelse.”

Endofsermon.Whentheyrealizedthatthatwasall,thereporters—lookingveryexasperated—gatheredtheircamerasandtaperecordersandleft,nevertobotherhimagain.

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MindWhatYouEat

§“Wehumanbeingshavelongtongues,youknow.Yousitaroundandsuddenlyyourtongueflicksouttosea:Youwanttoeatseafood.Thenitflicksaroundtheworld:Youwanttoeatforeigncuisine.Youhavetotrainyourtongueandshrinkitdowntosize.”

§“Whenyoueat,keepyourmindonyourbreath,andcontemplatewhyyou’reeating.Ifyou’reeatingsimplyforthetasteofthefood,thenwhatyoueatcanharmyou.”

§AfterhistriptoAmerica,oneofhisstudentsaskedhimifhehadhadachancetoeatpizzawhilehewasthere.Hementionedthathehad,andthatitwasverygood.Thissurprisedoneofhisstudentswhohadgonealongonthetrip.“Youateonlytwobites,”hesaid.“Wethoughtyoudidn’tlikeit.”

“Twobiteswereenoughtofillmeup,”heanswered.“Whywouldyouwantmetoeatmore?”

§Onceawomanwhohadbeenstudyingwithhimforonlyashortwhiledecidedtopreparesomefoodtodonatetohim.Wantingtomakesureitwouldbesomethingheliked,sheaskedhimstraightout,“Whatkindoffooddoyoulike,ThanPhaw?”

Hisanswer:“Foodthat’swithinreach.”

§ItwasaFridayevening,andagroupofAjaanFuang’sstudentswereridinginthebackofapickuptruckontheirwayfromBangkoktoWatDhammasathit.Anotherstudenthadsentabusheloforangesalongwiththemtodonatetothemonksatthewat,andafterawhileontheroadoneofthestudentsdecidedthattheorangeslookedawfullygood.Sohecameupwiththefollowingargument:“We’reThanPhaw’schildren,right?Andhewouldn’twantustogohungry,right?Soanyonewhodoesn’thaveanorangeisn’tachildofThanPhaw.”

Someofthegroupwereobservingtheeightprecepts,whichforbideatingfoodafternoon,sotheywereabletoslipthroughthenet.Everyoneelse,though,helpedhimorherselftotheoranges,eventhoughafewofthemfeltbadabouteatingfoodintendedforthemonks.Whentheyarrivedatthewat,theytoldAjaanFuangwhathadhappened,andheimmediatelylitintothem,sayingthatanyonewhotakesfoodintendedfor

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monksandeatsitbeforeithasbeengiventothemonksisgoingtoberebornasahungryghostinthenextlife.

Thisscaredonewomaninthegroup,whoimmediatelyresponded,“ButIonlyateonesection!”AjaanFuangreplied,“Well,ifyou’regoingtobeahungryghost,youmightaswelleatenoughtofillyourselfupwhileyoucan.”

§DuringtheRainsRetreatin1977acouplefromthetownofRayongcameouttothewatalmosteveryeveningtopracticemeditation.Thestrangethingaboutthemwasthatwhateverhappenedinthecourseoftheirmeditationwouldtendtohappentobothofthematthesametime.Ononeoccasiontheybothfoundthattheycouldn’teat,becausetheywereovercomebyasenseofthefilthinessoffood.Thislastedforthreeorfourdayswithouttheirgettingweakorhungry,sotheybegantowonderwhatstagetheyhadreachedintheirmeditation.

WhentheymentionedthistoAjaanFuangontheirnextvisittothewat,hehadthemsitinmeditation,andthentoldthem.“Okay,contemplatefoodtoseewhatit’smadeof.Elements,right?Andwhat’syourbodymadeof?Theverysameelements.Theelementsinyourbodyneedtheelementsinfoodinordertokeepgoing.Sowhygetallworkedupaboutthefilthinessoffood?Yourbodyisevenfilthier.WhentheBuddhateachesustocontemplatethefilthinessoffood,it’ssothatwecangetoverourdelusionsaboutit—notsothatwewon’tbeabletoeat.”Thatendedtheirinabilitytoeatfood.

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PeoplePracticingtheDhamma

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudents—aseamstress—wascriticizedbyacustomer:“YoupracticetheDhamma,don’tyou?Thenwhyareyousogreedy,chargingsuchhighprices?PeoplepracticingtheDhammashouldtakeonlyenoughprofitjusttogetby.”

Althoughsheknewherpriceswerefair,shecouldn’tthinkofagoodanswer,sothenexttimeshesawAjaanFuangshetoldhimwhathadhappened.Hereplied,“Thenexttimetheysaythat,tellthem—‘Look,I’mnotpracticingtheDhammatobestupid.’”

§WhenIfirstwenttostayatWatDhammasathit,theB-52’sfromUtapaoAirForceBasecouldsometimesbeheardhighoverheadintheweehoursofthemorning,flyingontheirbombingmissionsintoCambodia.EachtimeIheardthem,IbegantowonderwhatbusinessIhadmeditatingwhenthereweresomanyinjusticesintheworldthatneededtobefought.WhenImentionedthistoAjaanFuang,hesaid,“Ifyoutrytostraightenouttheworldwithoutreallystraighteningyourselfoutfirst,yourowninnergoodnesswilleventuallybreakdown,andthenwherewillyoube?Youwon’tbeabletodoanybody—yourselforanyoneelse—anygoodatall.”

§“Assoonaswe’reborn,we’resentencedtodeath—justthatwedon’tknowwhenourturnwillcome.Soyoucan’tbecomplacent.Startrightinanddevelopallyourgoodqualitiestothefullwhileyoustillhavethechance.”

§“Ifyouwanttobeagoodperson,makesureyouknowwheretruegoodnessreallylies.Don’tjustgothroughthemotionsofbeinggood.”

§“Weallwanthappiness,butforthemostpartwearen’tinterestedinbuildingthecausesforhappiness.Allwewantaretheresults.Butifwedon’ttakeaninterestinthecauses,howaretheresultsgoingtocomeourway?”

§WhenIfirstwenttopracticemeditationwithAjaanFuang,Iaskedhimifpeoplereallywererebornafterdeath.Heanswered,“Whenyoustartoutpracticing,theBuddhaasksyoutobelieveinonlyonething:karma.Asforthingsasidefromthat,whetherornotyoubelievethemisn’treallyimportant.”

Oneyear,shortlybeforetheRainsRetreat—atimewhenpeopletraditionally

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makeresolutionstostepuptheirpracticeoftheDhamma—oneofAjaanFuang’sstudentsapproachedhimandsaidthatshewasthinkingofobservingtheeightpreceptsduringtheRains,butwasafraidthatgoingwithouttheeveningmealwouldleaveherhungry.Heretorted:“TheBuddhafasteduntilhedidn’thaveanyfleshatall—justskinandbones—sothathecoulddiscovertheDhammatoteachus,butherewecan’tevenstandgoingwithoutonesinglemeal.It’sbecauseofthisthatwe’restillswimmingaroundinthecycleofbirthanddeath.”Asaresult,sheresolvedthatshe’dhavetoobservetheeightpreceptsoneachBuddhistsabbath—thefullmoon,thenewmoon,andthehalf-moondays—duringthethreemonthsoftheRains.Andsoshedid.AttheendoftheRainsshefeltreallyproudofherselfforhavingkepttoherresolution,butonhernextvisittoAjaanFuang,beforeshewasabletobroachthetopicatall,hecommented,“You’relucky,youknow.YourRainsRetreathasonlytwelvedays.Everyoneelse’sisthreemonths.”

OnhearingthisshefeltsoembarrassedthatshehasobservedtheeightpreceptseverydaythroughouteachRainsRetreateversince.

§AnotherstudentwasmeditatinginAjaanFuang’spresencewhen—inaspasmofmindlessness—sheslappedamosquitothatwasbitingherarm.AjaanFuangcommented:“Youchargeahighpriceforyourblood,don’tyou?Themosquitoasksforadrop,andyoutakeitslifeinexchange.”

§AyoungmanwasdiscussingthepreceptswithAjaanFuangandcametonumberfive,againsttakingintoxicants:“TheBuddhaforbadealcoholbecausemostpeoplelosetheirmindfulnesswhentheydrinkit,right?Butifyoudrinkmindfullyit’sokay,isn’tit,ThanPhaw?”“Ifyouwerereallymindful,”heanswered,“youwouldn’tdrinkitinthefirstplace.”

§Thereseemtobemoreexcusesforbreakingthefifthpreceptthanforanyother.OneeveninganotherstudentwasconversingwithAjaanFuangatthesametimethatagroupofpeopleweresittingaroundtheminmeditation.“Ican’tobservethefifthprecept,”hesaid,“becauseI’munderalotofgrouppressure.Whenwehavesocialoccasionsatwork,andeveryoneelseinthegroupisdrinking,Ihavetodrinkalongwiththem.”AjaanFuangpointedtothepeoplesittingaroundthemandasked,“Thisgroupisn’taskingyoutodrink.Whydon’tyougiveintotheirgrouppressureinstead?”

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§TheseamstresssawherfriendsobservingtheeightpreceptsatWatDhammasathit,andsodecidedtotryitherself.Butinthemiddleoftheafternoon,asshewaswalkingthroughthemonastery,shepassedaguavatree.Theguavaslookedinviting,soshepickedoneandtookabite.

AjaanFuanghappenedtobestandingnotfaraway,andsoheremarked,“Hey.Ithoughtyouweregoingtoobservetheeightprecepts.What’sthatinyourmouth?”Theseamstressrealizedinajoltthatshehadbrokenherprecepts,butAjaanFuangconsoledher,“It’snotallthatnecessarytoobservetheeightprecepts,butmakesureyouobservetheoneprecept,okay?Doyouknowwhattheonepreceptis?”

“No,ThanPhaw.Whatisit?”“Notdoinganyevil.Iwantyoutoholdontothisoneforlife.”

§AwomancametoWatDhammasathittoobservethepreceptsandmeditateforaweek,butbytheendoftheseconddayshetoldAjaanFuangthatshehadtoreturnhome,becauseshewasafraidherfamilycouldn’tgetalongwithouther.Hetaughthertocutthroughherworriesbysaying,“Whenyoucomehere,tellyourselfthatyou’vedied.Onewayoranother,yourfamilywillhavetolearntofendforthemselves.”

§OnhisfirstvisittoWatDhammasathit,amiddle-agedmanwassurprisedtoseeanAmericanmonk.HeaskedAjaanFuang,“HowisitthatWesternerscanordain?”

AjaanFuang’sanswer:“Don’tWesternershavehearts?”

§ABangkokmagazineoncecarriedtheserializedautobiographyofalaymeditatorwhousedhispowersofconcentrationtotreatdiseases.OneinstallmentmentionedhowhehadvisitedAjaanFuang,whohadcertifiedthathe(thelayman)hadattainedjhana.Thisdidn’tsoundlikeAjaanFuang’sstyle,butsoonafterthemagazinecameout,unusualnumbersofpeoplecametothewatundertheimpressionthatAjaanFuang,liketheauthoroftheautobiography,couldtreatillnessesthroughmeditation.Onewomanaskedhimifhetreatedkidneydiseases,andheanswered,“Itreatonlyonekindofdisease:diseasesofthemind.”

§AstudentaskedpermissiontokeepanotebookofAjaanFuang’steachings,butherefused,saying,“Isthatthesortofpersonyouare?—alwayscarryingfoodaroundinyourpocketforfearthere’llbenothingtoeat?”Thenhe

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explained:“Ifyoujoteverythingdown,you’llfeelit’sokaytoforgetwhatyou’vewritten,becauseit’sallthereinyournotebook.TheendresultisthatalltheDhammawillbeinyournotebook,andnoneinyourheart.”

§“Thetextssaythatifyoulistenwell,you’llgainwisdom.Tolistenwell,yourhearthastobequietandstill.Youlistenwithyourheart,notjustwithyourears.Onceyou’velistened,youhavetoputwhatyou’veheardintopracticerightthenandthere.That’swhenyou’llreapthebenefits.Ifyoudon’tputitintopractice,whatyou’veheardwillneverbecomerealinsideyou.”

§Once,whilethechediatWatDhammasathitwasbeingbuilt,someofthestudentsworkingonthechedigotintoaseriousargument.OneofthembecamesoupsetthatshewenttotellAjaanFuang,whowasstayinginBangkokatthetime.Whenshefinishedherreport,heaskedher,“Doyouknowwhatgravelis?”

Takenaback,sheanswered,“Yes.”“Doyouknowwhatdiamondsare?”

“Yes.”“Thenwhydon’tyougatherthediamonds?Whatgooddoyougetoutofgatheringgravel?”

§EveninaBuddhistcountrylikeThailand,someyoungpeoplewhopracticetheDhammafindthattheirparentsareagainstit,andfeelthattheyshouldbespendingtheirtimeinmorepracticalways.OncetheparentsoftheseamstresstriedtoputastoptohervisitstoWatMakut,andthisgotherveryangry.ButwhenshetoldherfeelingstoAjaanFuang,hewarnedher,“Youoweahugedebttoyourparents,youknow.Ifyougetangrywiththem,oryellatthem,you’restokingthefiresofhellonyourhead,sowatchout.Andremindyourself:Ifyouwantedparentswhowouldencourageyourpractice,whydidn’tyouchoosetobebornfromsomebodyelse?Thefactthatthey’reyourparentsshowsthatyou’vemadepastkarmawiththem.Sojustuseupyouroldkarmadebtsastheycome.There’snoneedtocreateanymorekarmabygettingintoarguments.”

§ChannelingspiritshaslongbeenpopularinThailand,andevensomepeoplewhopracticetheDhammaalsoliketoattendseances.ButAjaanFuangoncesaid,“Ifyouwantresultsfromyourpractice,youhavetomakeupyourmindthattheBuddhaisyouroneandonlyrefuge.Don’tgotakingrefugeinanythingelse.”

§“IfyoupracticetheDhamma,youdon’thavetobeamazedbyanyoneelse’spowersorabilities.Whateveryoudo,sayorthink,letyourhearttakeitsstand

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ontheprinciplesofreason.”

§“Thetruthlieswithinyou.Ifyou’retrueinwhatyoudo,you’llmeetwiththetruth.Ifyou’renot,you’llmeetonlywiththingsthatarefakeandimitation.”

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Merit

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudentsreportsthatthefirsttimeshemethim,heaskedher,“Wheredoyouusuallygotomakemerit?”SheansweredthatshehadhelpedsponsoraBuddhaimageatthattempleandcontributedtoacrematoriumatthistemple,etc.Soheaskedfurther:“Whyhaven’tyoumademeritatyourheart?”

§OnceAjaanFuanghadoneofhisstudentscutawaysomeofthegrassandweedsthatwerethreateningtoovergrowthemonastery.Shedidn’treallywanttodothework,though,andallthewhileasshewascuttingawayshekeptaskingherself,“WhatkindofkarmadidIdothatIhavetoworksohardlikethis?”Whenshehadfinished,hetoldher,“Well,yougotsomemerit,butnotverymuch.”“What?Afterallthatwork,Istilldidn’tgetverymuch?”

“Ifyouwantyourfullmeasureofmerit,themerithastogoallthewaytoyourheart.”

§There’sanotherstoryinvolvinggrass.OnedayAjaanFuangpointedouttheovergrowngrassnearhishutandaskedthesamewoman,“Don’tyouwantthegrassatthecorralgate?”

“Whatdoyoumean,grassatthecorralgate?”“Theopportunitytomakemeritrightnearbythateveryoneelseoverlooks.That’scalled‘grassatthecorralgate.’”

§Anothertime,AjaanFuangtooksomeofhisBangkokstudentsupthehilltocleantheareaaroundthechedi.Theyfoundalargepileoftrashthatsomeonehadthrownawayupthere,andoneofthegroupcomplained,“Howcouldanyonebesodisrespectfulastodosomethinglikethis?”ButAjaanFuangtoldher,“Don’tcriticizewhoeverdidit.Iftheyhadn’tthrownthetrashhere,wewouldn’thavetheopportunitytoearnthemeritthatcomesfromcleaningitup.”

§Oneday,afterAjaanFuang’snamehadappearedinamagazinearticle,agroupofthreemenfromBangkoktookadayofffromworktodrivetoRayongandpaytheirrespectstohim.Afterbowingdownandthenchattingforawhile,oneofthemsaid,“Ourcountrystillhasmonkswhopracticerightlyandwellsothatwecanasktohaveashareoftheirparamis,isn’tthattrue,ThanPhaw?”

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“It’strue,”heanswered,“butifwekeepaskingforashareoftheirparamiswithoutdevelopinganyofourown,they’llseethatwe’resimplybeggarsandtheywon’twanttosharewithusanymore.”

§AwomaninthetownofSamutPrakaan,justoutsideofBangkok,sentwordthroughoneofAjaanFuang’sstudentsthatshe’dliketodonatealargesumofmoneytohelpbuildtheBuddhaimageatWatDhammasathit,butshewantedhimtocometoherhometogiveablessingasshehandedoverthecheck.Herefusedtogo,saying,“Ifpeoplewantmerit,theyhavetogolookingforit.Theycan’texpectthemerittocomelookingforthem.”

§AnotherwomanoncetelephonedthemainofficeatWatMakut,sayingthatshewasgoingtoprovideamealformonksatherhouseandwantedtoinviteAjaanFuangtothemealbecauseshehadheardthathewasaNobleDisciple.Whentheinvitationwasconveyedtohim,herefusedit,saying,“IsherricesospecialthatonlyNobleDisciplescangettoeatit?”

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudentstoldhimthatshe’dliketodosomethingspecialtomakemeritonherbirthday.Hereplied,“Whydoesithavetobeonyourbirthday?Doyougetlessmeritifyoudoitanyotherday?Ifyouwanttomakemerit,goaheadanddoitonthedaythethoughtoccurstoyou.Don’twaitforyourbirthday,becauseyourdeathdaymaygettoyoufirst.”

§Referringtopeoplewhodidn’tliketomeditatebutwerehappytohelpwiththeconstructionworkatthewat,AjaanFuangoncesaid,“Lightmeritdoesn’tregisterwiththem,soyouhavetofindsomereallyheavymeritforthemtomake.That’stheonlywaytokeepthemsatisfied.”

§Shortlyafterthechediwasfinished,agroupofAjaanFuang’sstudentsweresittingandadmiringit,takingjoyinallthemeritinstoreforthembecausetheyhadhadahandinbuildingit.AjaanFuanghappenedtowalkbyandoverhearwhattheyweresaying,andsohecommented,asiftonooneinparticular,“Don’tgetattachedtomaterialthings.Whenyoumakemerit,don’tgetattachedtothemerit.Ifyouletyourselfgetcarriedaway,thinking‘Ibuiltthischediwithmyownhands,’watchout.Ifyouhappenedtodierightnow,allyou’dbeabletothinkwouldbe,‘Thischediismine,it’smine.’Insteadofbeingreborninheavenwitheveryoneelse,you’dberebornasahungryghosttoguardoverthechediforaweekorsobecauseyourheartwasfixatedonmaterialthings.”

§“If,whenyoudogood,yougetstuckonyourgoodness,you’llneverget

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free.Whereveryou’restuck,that’swherethere’sbecomingandbirth.”

§ThereisanoldtraditioninBuddhism—basedontheApadanatales—thatwheneveryoumakeagifttothereligionorperformsomeothermeritoriousdeed,youshoulddedicatethemeritofthedeedtoaparticulargoal.ThereweretimeswhenAjaanFuangwouldtellhisstudentstomakesimilardedicationseverytimetheymeditated,althoughthededicationhe’drecommendwoulddependontheindividual.Sometimeshe’drecommendthededicationKingAsokamadeattheendofhislife:“InmyfuturelivesmayIhavesovereigntyoverthemind.”Othertimeshe’dsay,“There’snoneedtomakeanylong,drawn-outdedications.Tellyourself:IfIhavetobereborn,mayIalwaysencountertheBuddha’steachings.”

Butitwasn’talwaysthecasethathewouldrecommendsuchdedications.Onceawomantoldhimthatwhenshemademeritshecouldn’tthinkofanyparticulargoaltodedicatethemerittowards.Hetoldher,“Ifthemindisfull,there’snoneedtomakeanydedicationifyoudon’twantto.It’slikeeating.Whetherornotyouexpressawishtogetfull,ifyoukeeponeating,there’snowayyoucanhelpbutgetfull.”

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Student/Teacher

§“Whateveryoudo,alwaysthinkofyourteacher.Ifyouforgetyourteacher,you’recuttingyourselfoffattheroot.”

§“Apersonwhogoesfromteachertoteacherdoesn’treallyhaveanyteachersatall.”

§OnoccasionpeoplewouldpresentAjaanFuangwithamulets,andhewouldhandthemoutamonghisstudents—butonlyrarelyamongthosewhowereespeciallyclosetohim.Onedayamonkwhohadlivedseveralyearswithhimcouldn’thelpbutcomplain,“Whyisitthatwhenyougetgoodamulets,younevergiveanytome,andalwaystoeverybodyelse?”

AjaanFuangreplied,“I’vealreadygivenyoulotsofthingsbetterthanthat.Whydon’tyouacceptthem?”

§“Meditatorswholiveclosetotheirteacher,butwhodon’tunderstandhim,arelikeaspooninapotofcurry:It’llneverknowhowsweet,sour,salty,richorhotthecurryis.”

§AjaanFuang’sanalogyforstudentswhoalwayshavetoasktheirteachersforadviceonhowtohandleevenminorproblemsineverydaylife:“They’rejustlikebabypuppies.Assoonastheydefecatetheyhavetoruntotheirmothertohaveherlickthemoff.They’llnevergrowupontheirown.”

§“Studentswhogetstuckontheirteachersarelikegnats.Nomatterhowmuchyouchasethemaway,theykeepcomingbackandwon’tleaveyoualone.”

§“Ifateacherpraisesastudenttohisface,it’sasignthatthat’sasfarasthestudentwillgo—heprobablywon’tbeabletopracticetoanygreaterheightsinthislifetime.Thereasontheteacherpraiseshimissothathe’llbeabletotakeprideinthefactthatatleasthe’smadeitthisfar.Hisheartwillhavesomethinggoodtoholdontowhenheneedsitatdeath.”

§ManyofAjaanFuang’sstudentswereconvincedthathewasabletoreadtheirminds,becausetimeaftertimehewouldbroachtopicsthathappenedtobegoingthroughtheirheadsorweighingdowntheirheartsatthemoment.Imyselfhadmanyexperienceslikethis,andmanywerereportedtomewhileIwas

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compilingthisbook.Inmostcasesofthissort,though,whathehadtosayhadspecialmeaningonlyforthosedirectlyinvolved,andsoI’llasktopassoverthemhere.ButtherearetwocasesI’dliketomention,sincetheystrikemeasbeingusefulforallwhopracticetheDhamma.

Once,oneofhisstudents—ayoungman—tookthebusfromBangkoktoRayongtohelpworkonthechedi.Hegotoffatthemouthoftheroadleadingtothewat,butdidn’tfeellikewalkingthesixkilometersitwouldtaketogetthere,sohesatatthenoodlestandbytheintersectionandsaidtohimself—asachallengetoAjaanFuang—“IfThanPhawisreallysomethingspecial,mayacarcomebyandgivemealifttothewat.”Onehourpassed,two,three,andnotasinglecarortruckturnedintotheroad,sohefinallyhadtowalkthedistanceonfoot.Whenhearrivedatthewat,hewenttoAjaanFuang’shuttopayhisrespects,butassoonasAjaanFuangsawhimapproach,hegotup,enteredhisroomandclosedthedoor.Thisshookthestudentalittle,butstillheboweddowninfrontofthecloseddoor.Themomenthefinished,AjaanFuangopenedthedooracrackandsaid,“Look.Ididn’taskforyoutocomehere.Youcameofyourownfreewill.”

Anothertime,afterthechediwasfinished,thesameyoungmanwassittinginmeditationatthechedi,inhopesthatavoicewouldwhisperthewinningnumberofthenextlotteryinhisear.Whatheheard,though,wasthesoundofAjaanFuangactuallywalkingpastandsaying,asiftonooneinparticular,“Exactlywhatareyoutakingasyourrefuge?”

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LivingintheWorld

§“AjaanMunoncesaid,‘Peopleareallalike,butnotatallalike,butinthefinalanalysis,allalike.’Youhavetothinkaboutthisforagoodwhilebeforeyoucanunderstandwhathewasgettingat.”

§“Ifyouwanttojudgeotherpeople,judgethembytheirintentions.”

§“Whenyouwanttoteachotherpeopletobegood,youhavetoseehowfartheirgoodnesscango.Ifyoutrytomakethembetterthantheycanbe,you’retheonewho’sbeingstupid.”

§“Nothingcomesfromfocusingonthefaultsofothers.Youcangetmoredonebylookingatyourownfaultsinstead.”

§“Howgoodorbadotherpeopleareistheirownbusiness.Focusonyourownbusinessinstead.”

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudentscomplainedtohimaboutalltheproblemsshewasfacingatwork.Shewantedtoquitandlivequietlybyherself,butcircumstanceswouldn’tallowit,becauseshehadtoprovideforhermother.AjaanFuangtoldher,“Ifyouhavetolivewiththesethings,thenfindouthowtoliveinawaythatrisesabovethem.That’stheonlywayyou’llbeabletosurvive.”

§Adviceforastudentwhowaslettingthepressureatworkgetherdown:“Whenyoudoajob,don’tletthejobdoyou.”

§AnotheroneofAjaanFuang’sstudentswashavingseriousproblems,bothathomeandinherwork,soheappealedtoherfightingspirit:“Anyonewho’sareal,livepersonwillhavetomeetupwithreal,liveproblemsinlife.”

§“Whenyoumeetwithobstacles,youhavetoputupafight.Ifyougiveupeasily,you’llendupgivingupallyourlifelong.”

§“Tellyourselfyou’remadeoutofheartwood,andnotoutofsapwood.”

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudents—ayoungnurse—hadtoputupwithbeingthebruntofalotofgossipatwork.Atfirstshetriedtoignoreit,butasit

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happenedmoreandmoreoften,herpatiencebegantowearthin.

Oneday,whenthegossipwasreallygettingtoher,shewenttomeditatewithAjaanFuangatWatMakut.Whilemeditating,shesawavisionofherselfrepeatingback,back,backtoinfinity,asifshewerecaughtbetweentwoparallelmirrors.Thethoughtoccurredtoherthatinhermanypreviouslivesshehadprobablyhadtoendureanuntoldamountofthesamesortofgossip,andthismadeherevenmorefedupwithhersituation.SowhensheleftmeditationshetoldAjaanFuangofhowtiredshewasofbeinggossipedabout.Hetriedtoconsoleher,saying,“Thissortofthingispartandparceloftheworld,youknow.Wherethere’spraise,therealsohastobecriticismandgossip.Whenyouknowthis,whyletyourselfgetinvolved?”Hermoodwassostrong,though,thatshearguedwithhim,“I’mnotgettinginvolvedwiththem,ThanPhaw.Theycomeandgetinvolvedwithme!”

Soheturnedthetablesonher:“Thenwhydon’tyouaskyourself—whoaskedyoutobuttinandbebornhereinthefirstplace?”

§“Iftheysayyou’renogood,remindyourselfthattheirwordsgoonlyasfarastheirlips.They’veneverreachedoutandtouchedyouatall.”

§“Otherpeoplecriticizeusandthenforgetallaboutit,butwetakeitandkeepthinkingaboutit.It’sasiftheyspitoutsomefoodandwepickitupandeatit.Whenthat’sthecase,who’sbeingstupid?”

§“Pretendyouhavestonesweighingdownyourears,sothatyoudon’tgetblownawaybyeverythingyouhearsaid.”

§OnedayAjaanFuangasked,asifoutoftheblue,“Ifyourclothingfelldownintoacesspool,wouldyoupickitbackupagain?”Thewomanheaskedhadnoideawhathewasgettingat,butknewthatifshewasn’tcarefulaboutansweringhisquestions,she’dcomeoutlookinglikeafool,soshehedgedheranswer:“Itdepends.Ifitwasmyonlysetofclothing,I’dhavetopickitup.ButifIhadothersets,I’dprobablyletitgo.Whatareyougettingat,ThanPhaw?”

“Ifyouliketohearbadthingsaboutotherpeople,theneventhoughyouhavenopartinthebadkarmaoftheiracts,youstillpickupsomeofthestench.”

§Ifanyofhisstudentswerebearingagrudgeaboutsomething,hewouldtellthem:“Youcan’tevensacrificesomethingasminorasthis?Thinkofitasmakingagift.RememberhowmanyvaluablethingstheBuddhasacrificedduringhislifeasPrinceVessantara,andthenaskyourself,‘Thisangerofmine

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hasnovalueatall.Whycan’tIsacrificeit,too?’”

§“Thinkfirstbeforeyouact.Don’tbethesortofpersonwhoactsfirstandthenhastothinkaboutitafterwards.”

§“Bewareoffall-in-the-wellkindness:thecaseswhereyouwanttohelpotherpeople,butinsteadofyourpullingthemup,theypullyoudown.”

§“Whenpeoplesaysomethingisgood,it’stheirideaofgood.Butisitalwayswhat’sreallygoodforyou?”

§“Ifpeoplehateyou,that’swhenyou’reletoffthehook.Youcancomeandgoasyoulikewithouthavingtoworryaboutwhetherornotthey’llmissyouorgetupsetatyourgoing.Andyoudon’thavetobringanypresentsforthemwhenyoucomeback.You’refreetodoasyoulike.”

§“Tryingtowinoutoverotherpeoplebringsnothingbutanimosityandbadkarma.It’sbettertowinoutoveryourself.”

§“Whateveryoulose,letitbelost,butdon’teverloseheart.”

§“Iftheytakewhat’syours,tellyourselfthatyou’remakingitagift.Otherwisetherewillbenoendtotheanimosity.”

§“Theirtakingwhat’syoursisbetterthanyourtakingwhat’stheirs.”

§“Ifit’sreallyyours,it’llhavetostaywithyou,nomatterwhat.Ifit’snotreallyyours,whygetallworkedupaboutit?”

§“There’snothingwrongwithbeingpoorontheoutside,butmakesureyou’renotpoorontheinside.Makeyourselfrichingenerosity,virtue,andmeditation—thetreasuresofthemind.”

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudentscomplainedtohim,“Ilookatotherpeople,andtheyseemtohavesuchaneasylife.Whyislifesohardonme?”Hisanswer:“Your‘hardlife’isten,twentytimes‘thegoodlife’foralotofpeople.Whydon’tyoulookatthepeoplewhohaveahardertimethanyoudo?”

§Sometimeswhenanyofhisstudentswerefacinghardshipsinlife,AjaanFuangwouldteachthemtoremindthemselves:“HowcanIblameanyoneelse?Nobodyeverhiredmetobeborn.Icameofmyownfreewill.”

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§“Everythingthathappenshasitslifespan.Itwon’tlastforever.Whenitslifespanisup,it’llgoawayonitsown.”

§“Tohaveapartnerinlifeistosuffer.Tohaveagoodpartnerisreallytosuffer,becauseofalltheattachment.”

§“Sensualpleasureislikeadrug:Onetasteandyougetaddicted.Theysaythatwithheroinit’shardtobreakthehabit,butthisisevenworse.Itgoesdeep,rightintothebone.It’swhatmadeusgetborninthefirstplace,andhaskeptuscirclingthroughbirthanddeathforaeonsandaeons.There’snomedicineyoucantaketobreakthehabit,towashitoutofyoursystem,asidefromthemedicineoftheBuddha’steachings.”

§“WhenweseeHindusworshipingSivalingasitlooksstrangetous,butactuallyeveryoneintheworldworshipstheSivalinga—i.e.,theyworshipsex,simplythattheHindusaretheonlyoneswhoareopenaboutit.Sexisthecreatoroftheworld.Thereasonwe’reallbornisbecauseweworshiptheSivalingainourhearts.”

§Once,whenoneofAjaanFuang’sstudentswasbeingpressuredbyherparentstolookforahusbandsothatshecouldsettledownandhavechildren,sheaskedhim,“Isittruewhattheysay,thatawomangainsalotofmeritinhavingachild,inthatshegivessomeoneelsethechancetobeborn?”

“Ifthatweretrue,”heansweredher,“thendogswouldgetgobsofmerit,becausetheygivebirthtowholelittersatatime.”

§Healsotoldher,“Gettingmarriedisnowaytoescapesuffering.Actually,allyoudoispilemoresufferingonyourself.TheBuddhataughtthatthefivekhandhasareaheavyburden,butifyougetmarried,allofasuddenyouhavetentoworryabout,andthenfifteen,andthentwenty...”

§“Youhavetobeyourownrefuge.Ifyou’rethesortthathastotakerefugeinotherpeople,thenyou’llhavetoseethingsthesamewaytheydo,whichmeansyouhavetobestupidthesamewaytheyare.Sopullyourselfoutofallthat,andtakeagoodlookatyourselfuntilthingsareclearwithinyou.”

§“Youmaythink,‘mychild,mychild,’butisitreallyyours?Evenyourownbodyisn’treallyyours.”

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudents,whenshewassufferingaseriousliverdisease,dreamedthatshehaddiedandgonetoheaven.Shetookthisasabad

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omenandsowenttoWatMakuttotellherdreamtoAjaanFuang.Hetriedtoconsoleher,sayingthatitwasreallyagoodomenindisguise.Ifshesurvivedthedisease,she’dprobablygetapromotionatwork.Ifshedidn’t,she’dbereborningoodcircumstances.Assoonashesaidthis,though,shegotveryupset:“ButI’mnotreadytodie!”“Look,”hetoldher,“whenthetimecomestogo,youhavetobewillingtogo.Lifeisn’tarubberbandyoucanstretchoutorshrinkasyoulike.”

§“Ifthereareanysensualpleasuresyoureallyhungerfor,it’sasignyouenjoyedthembeforeinapreviouslife.That’swhyyoumissthemsomuchthistimearound.Ifyouthinkaboutthislongenough,itshouldbeenoughtomakeyoudispassionateanddismayed.”

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TheCelibateLife

§“Somepeoplesaythatmonksdon’tdoanywork,butactuallytheworkofabandoningyourdefilementsisthemostdifficultworkintheworld.Theworkoftheeverydayworldhasitsdaysoff,butourworkdoesn’thaveanytimeoffatall.It’ssomethingyouhavetodo24hoursaday.Sometimesyoumayfeelyou’renotuptoit,butstillyouhavetodoit.Ifyoudon’t,who’sgoingtodoitforyou?It’syourduty,andnobodyelse’s.Ifyoudon’tdoit,whatareyoulivingoffthedonationsofotherpeoplefor?”

§“Whateverworkyou’redoing,keepaneyeonyourmind.Ifyouseethatit’sgoingoffthepath,stopwhateveryou’redoingandfocusallyourattentiononit.Theworkoflookingafteryourmindshouldalwayscomefirst.”

§“TheBuddha’sDhammaisakaliko—timeless.Thereasonwehaven’treachedityetisbecausewehavelotsoftimes:timeforthis,timeforthat,timetowork,timetorest,timetoeat,timetosleep...Ourwholelifeturnsintotimes,andasaresulttheydon’tgiveusachancetoseethetruthclearlywithinourselves.Sowehavetomakeourpracticetimeless.That’swhenthetruthwillappearinourhearts.”

§AjaanFuangwasverymeticulousaboutkeepingthingscleanandintheirplace,andtaughthisstudentstobemeticuloustoo,forthatwasthewayhewastaughtbyhisteachers,andheknewthathehadbenefittedfromit.Inhiswords,“Ifyoucan’tmasterobviousthingslikethis,howareyougoingtomasterthesubtlethings,likethemind?”

§Themonkwhoattendedtohisneeds—cleaninghishut,boilingthewaterforhisbath,lookingafterhimwhenhewassick,etc.—hadtobeveryobservant,forAjaanFuangusedtheteacher-studentrelationshipasanopportunitytoteachbyexample.Insteadofexplainingwherethingsshouldbeplacedorwhencertaindutiesshouldbedone,heleftituptothestudenttoobserveforhimself.Ifhecaughton,AjaanFuangwouldn’tsayanything.Ifhedidn’t,AjaanFuangwouldgivehimadressingdown—butstillwouldn’texplainwhatwaswrong.Itwasuptothestudenttofigurethingsoutforhimself.AsAjaanFuangsaid,“IfitgetstothepointwhereIhavetotellyou,itshowsthatwe’restillstrangers.”

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§Oneevening,oneofthemonksatWatDhammasathitsawAjaanFuangworkingalone,pickingupscrapsoflumberaroundthechediconstructionsiteandputtingtheminorder.Themonkrandowntohelphim,andafterawhileaskedhim,“ThanPhaw,thissortofworkisn’tsomethingyoushouldbedoingalone.Therearelotsofotherpeople.Whydon’tyougetthemtohelp?”

“Iamgettingotherpeopletohelp,”AjaanFuangansweredashecontinuedtopickuppiecesofwood.“Who?”themonkaskedashelookedaroundandsawnooneelse.

“You.”

§WhenIreturnedtoThailandin1976tobeordained,AjaanFuanggavemetwowarnings:1)“Beingameditatorisn’tsimplyamatterofsittingwithyoureyesclosed.Youhavetobesharpateverythingyoudo.”

2)“Ifyouwanttolearn,youhavetothinklikeathiefandfigureouthowtostealyourknowledge.Whatthismeansisthatyoucan’tjustwaitfortheteachertoexplaineverything.Youhavetonoticeforyourselfwhathedoes,andwhy—foreverythinghedoeshasitsreason.”

§Therelationshipofamonktohissupportersissomethingofabalancingact.OneofAjaanFuang’sfavoritereminderstohismonkdiscipleswas,“Remember,nobody’shiredyoutobecomeamonk.Youhaven’tordainedtobecomeanybody’sservant.”Butifamonkcomplainedthatthemonasteryattendantsweren’tdoingastheyweretold,he’dsay,“Didyouordaintohaveotherpeoplewaitonyou?”

§“Ourlifedependsonthesupportofothers,sodon’tdoanythingthatwouldweighthemdown.”

§“Monkswhoeatthefoodthatotherpeopledonate,butthendon’tpractice,canexpecttoberebornaswaterbuffaloesnexttimearound,totillthefieldsandworkofftheirdebts.”

§“Don’tthinkthatthesmalldisciplinaryrulesaren’timportant.AsAjaanMunoncesaid,logshavenevergottenintopeople’seyes,butfinesawdustcan—anditcanblindyou.”

§Westernwomenareoftenupsetwhentheylearnthatmonksaren’tallowedtotouchthem,andtheyusuallytakeitasasignthatBuddhismdiscriminatesagainstwomen.ButasAjaanFuangexplainedit,“ThereasontheBuddhadidn’tallowmonkstotouchwomenisnotthatthere’sanythingwrongwithwomen.

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It’sbecausethere’ssomethingwrongwiththemonks:Theystillhavementaldefilements,whichiswhytheyhavetobekeptundercontrol.”

§Foranyonewhotriestofollowthecelibatelife,theoppositesexisthebiggesttemptationtoleavethepath.IfAjaanFuangwasteachingmonks,he’dsay,“Womenarelikevines.Atfirsttheyseemsoweakandsoft,butifyouletthemgrowonyou,theycurluparoundyouuntiltheyhaveyoualltiedupandfinallybringyoudown.”Whenteachingnuns,he’dwarnthemaboutmen.Onceanunwasthinkingofdisrobingandreturninghome,knowingthatherfatherwouldarrangeamarriageforher.SheaskedAjaanFuangforadvice,andhetoldher,“Askyourself.Doyouwanttoliveinsidethenooseorout?”Asaresult,shedecidedshe’dratherstayout.

§“Ifyoufindyourselfthinkingaboutsex,runyourhandoveryourheadtoremindyourselfofwhoyouare.”

§AjaanFuanghadmanystoriestotellabouthistimeswithAjaanLee.OneofmyfavoriteswasofthetimealargegroupofAjaanLee’sBangkokstudentsarrangedtogowithhimonameditationtripintotheforest.TheyagreedtomeetatHuaLampong,themaintrainstationinBangkok,andtakethetrainnorthtoLopburi.Whenthegroupassembledatthestation,though,itturnedoutthatmanyofthemhadeachbroughtalongatleasttwolargesuitcasesof“necessities”forthetrip,andevenmanyofthemonksfromBangkokmonasterieshadbroughtalonglargeloads.Onseeingthis,AjaanLeesaidnothing,butsimplysetoutwalkingnorthalongtherailroadtracks.Sincehewaswalking,everyonehadtowalk,althoughitwasn’tlongbeforethemembersofthegroupmostburdeneddownbegancomplaining,“ThanPhaw,whyareyoumakinguswalk?We’vegotsomuchheavystufftocarry!”

AtfirstAjaanLeesaidnothing,butfinallytoldthem,ashekeptonwalking,“Ifit’sheavy,thenwhyburdenyourselfwithit?”Ittookafewmomentsforhismessagetosinkin,butsoonthedifferentmembersofthegrouphadstoppedtoopentheirbagsandthroweverythingunessentialintothelotuspondsthatlinedeithersideoftherailroadtracks.Whentheyreachedthenexttrainstation,AjaanLeesawthattheyhadtrimmeddowntheirbelongingsenoughthathecouldletthemtakethenexttrainnorth.

§"Whenyouliveinamonastery,pretendthatyou’relivingalone:Whatthismeansisthatonceyou’vefinishedwiththegroupactivities—themeal,thechanting,thechores,andsoon—youdon’thavetogetinvolvedwithanyone.

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Gobacktoyourhutandmeditate.

“Whenyoulivealone,pretendthatyou’reinamonastery:Setupascheduleandsticktoit.”

§WhenIwenttoWatAsokaram—averylargemonastery—formyfirstRainsRetreat,AjaanFuangtoldme,“IftheyaskyouquestionsinThai,answerinEnglish.IftheyaskinEnglish,answerinThai.Afterawhilethey’llgettiredtotalkingtoyou,andwillleaveyoualonetomeditate.”

§“It’sgoodtoliveinamonasterywherenoteveryoneisseriousaboutthepractice,becauseitteachesyoutodependonyourself.Ifyoulivedonlywithpeoplewhowereseriousmeditators,you’dgetsothatyouwouldn’tbeabletosurviveanywhereelse.”

§“Wekeepdisagreeablepeoplearoundthemonasteryasawayoftestingtoseeifourdefilementsreallyareallgone.”

§“Thepurposeofadheringtotheasceticpracticesistoweardownyourdefilements.Ifyouadheretothemwiththethoughtofimpressingotherpeople,you’ddobetternottoadheretothematall.”

§Onfastingasanaidtomeditation:“Forsomepeopleitworkswell,forothersitworksjusttheopposite—themoretheyfast,thestrongertheirdefilementsget.It’snotthecasethatwhenyoustarvethebodyyoustarvethedefilements,becausedefilementsdon’tcomefromthebody.Theycomefromthemind.”

§“There’sapassagewheretheBuddhaasks,‘Daysandnightspassby,passby.Whatareyoudoingrightnow?’Sowhatanswerdoyouhaveforhim?”

§“Ifyougoteachingothersbeforeyourownpracticeisuptostandard,youdomoreharmthangood.”

§“Trainingameditatorisliketrainingaboxer:Youpullyourpunchesanddon’thithimanyharderthanhecantake.Butwhenhecomesbackatyou,hegivesiteverythinghe’sgot.”

§ThefirsttimeIwasgoingtogiveasermon,AjaanFuangtoldme:“Pretendyouhaveaswordinyourhand.Ifanypeopleintheaudiencethinkcriticalthoughtsofyou,cutofftheirheads.”

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§WhenIfirstwenttoWatDhammasathit,thetripfromBangkokwasanall-dayaffair,sincetheroadsweremuchworseandmoreroundaboutthannow.OneeveningawomanrentedacabandtraveledallthewayfromBangkoktogetAjaanFuang’sadviceontheproblemsshewashavinginherfamily,andafteracoupleofhoursofconsultationshetookthecaballthewayback.

Aftersheleft,hesaidtome,“There’sonegoodthingaboutlivingwayouthere:IfwewerelivingnearBangkok,peoplewithalotoffreetimeontheirhandsandnoideaofhowtospenditwouldcomeandwasteourtimechattingallday.Buthere,whenpeoplemaketheefforttocomeout,itshowsthattheyreallywantourhelp.Andnomatterhowmanyhoursittakestotalkthingsoverwiththem,it’snowasteoftimeatall.”

§“Whenpeoplecometoseeme,Ihavethemsitandmeditatefirstsothattheyknowhowtomaketheirmindsquiet.OnlythenwillIletthembringupanyotherproblemstheymaywanttotalkabout.Ifyoutrydiscussingthingswiththemwhentheirmindsaren’tquiet,there’snowaythey’llunderstand.”

§“Ifpeoplegetitintotheirheadsthatthey’reenlightenedwhentheyaren’t,thenyoushouldn’twasteanybreathontryingtostraightenthemout.Iftheydon’thavefaithinyou100%,thenthemoreyoutrytoreasonwiththem,themorethey’llgetsetintheiropinions.Iftheydohavefaithinyou,thenallittakesisonesentenceortwoandthey’llcometotheirsenses.”

§OncethefatherofoneofthemonkslivingwithAjaanFuangwrotehissonaletteraskinghimtodisrobe,returnhome,continuehisstudies,getajob,startafamily,andhaveanormal,happylifelikeeveryoneelseintheworld.ThemonkmentionedthistoAjaanFuang,whosaid,“Hesayshiskindofhappinessissomethingspecial,butlookatit—whatkindofhappinessisit,really?Justthesameoldsmellystuffyouleftwhenyouordained.Isn’tthereanyhappinessbetterthanthat?”

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Meditation

§ManywerethetimeswhenpeoplewouldtellAjaanFuangthat—withalltheworkandresponsibilitiesintheirlives—theyhadnotimetomeditate.Andmanywerethetimeshe’drespond,“Andyouthinkyou’llhavetimeafteryou’redead?”

§“Allyouhavetostudyisthemeditation-word,buddho.Asforanyotherfieldsyoumightstudy,theynevercometoanend,andcan’ttakeyoubeyondsuffering.Butonceyou’recometotheendofbuddho,that’swhenyou’llcometotruehappiness.”

§“Whenthemind’snotquiet—that’swhenitspoorandburdenedwithdifficulties.Ittakesmolehillsandturnsthemintomountains.Butwhenthemindisquiet,there’snosuffering,becausethere’snothingatall.Nomountainsatall.Whenthere’salottothemind,it’ssimplyalotofdefilement,makingitsuffer.”

§“Ifyou’resingle-mindedaboutwhateveryouthinkofdoing,you’resuretosucceed.”

§“Whenyou’rethinkingbuddhoyoudon’thavetowonderaboutwhetherornotyou’lldowellinyourmeditation.Ifyouputyourmindtoit,you’resuretodowell.Thethingsthatcometodisturbyouaresimplytheforcesoftemptation,cometoputonaplay.Whatevertheplay,allyouhavetodoiswatch—youdon’thavetogetonstagewiththem.”

§“What’sreallyessentialisthatyoubringyourviewsinlinewiththetruth.Onceyourviewsareright,themindwillimmediatelycometorest.Ifyourviewsarewrong,everythingisimmediatelywrong.Allthethingsyouneedforthepractice—thebreath,themind—arealreadythere.Sotrytobringyourviewsinlinewiththebreath,andyouwon’thavetousealotofforceinyourmeditation.Themindwillsettledownandcometorestrightaway.”

§“Themindislikeaking.Itsmoodsarelikehisministers.Don’tbeakingwho’seasilyswayedbyhiscourt.”

§AgroupoflaypeoplewhohadstudiedtheAbhidhammatogethercametoAjaanFuangtotryouthisversionofmentaltraining,butwhenhetoldthemto

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sit,closetheireyes,andfocusonthebreath,theyimmediatelybackedoff,sayingthattheydidn’twanttopracticeconcentration,forfearthatthey’dgetstuckonjhanaandendupbeingrebornintheBrahmaworlds.Heresponded,“What’stheretobeafraidof?Evennon-returnersarerebornintheBrahmaworlds.Atanyrate,beingrebornintheBrahmaworldsisbetterthanbeingrebornasadog.”

§WhenAjaanFuangtaughtmeditation,hedidn’tliketomapthingsoutinadvance.Assoonashehadexplainedthebeginningsteps,he’dhavethestudentstartsittingrightinhispresence,andthentakethestepsbackhometoworkonthere.Ifanythingcameupinthecourseofthepractice,he’dexplainhowtodealwithitandthengoontothenextstep.OncealaymanwhohadknownmorethanhisshareofmeditationteacherscametodiscusstheDhammawithAjaanFuang,askinghimmanyquestionsofanadvancednatureasawayoftestinghislevelofattainment.AjaanFuangaskedhiminreturn,“Haveyouhadtheseexperiencesinyourownmeditationyet?”

“No,notyet.”“TheninthatcaseI’drathernotdiscussthem,becauseifwediscussthemwhenthey’renotyetarealityforyou,they’lljustbetheories,andnottherealDhamma.”

§OnemeditatornoticedthathispracticeunderAjaanFuangwasmakingquickprogress,andsoheaskedwhatthenextstepwouldbe.“I’mnotgoingtotellyou,”AjaanFuangsaid.“Otherwiseyou’llbecomethesortofamazingmarvelwhoknowseverythingbeforehemeetswithit,andmasterseverythingbeforehe’striedhishand.Justkeeppracticingandyou’llfindoutonyourown.”

§“Youcan’tplanthewayyourpracticeisgoingtogo.Themindhasitsownstepsandstages,andyouhavetoletthepracticefollowinlinewiththem.That’stheonlywayyou’llgetgenuineresults.Otherwiseyou’llturnintoahalf-bakedarahant.”

§“Don’tmakeajournalofyourmeditationexperiences.Ifyoudo,you’llstartmeditatinginordertohavethisorthatthinghappen,sothatyoucanwriteitdowninyourjournal.Andasaresult,you’llendupwithnothingbutthethingsyou’vefabricated.”

§Somepeopleareafraidtomeditatetooseriously,forfearthatthey’llgocrazy,butasAjaanFuangoncesaid,“Youhavetobecrazyaboutmeditationifyouwanttomeditatewell.Andasforwhateverproblemscomeup,thereare

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alwayswaystosolvethem.What’sreallyscaryisifyoudon’tmeditateenoughfortheproblemstocomeoutintheopeninthefirstplace.”

§“Otherpeoplecanteachyouonlytheouterskin,butasforwhatliesdeeperinside,onlyyoucanlaydownthelawforyourself.Youhavetodrawtheline,beingmindful,keepingtrackofwhatyoudoatalltimes.It’slikehavingateacherfollowingyouaround,inpublicandinprivate,keepingwatchoveryou,tellingyouwhattodoandwhatnottodo,makingsurethatyoustayinline.Ifyoudon’thavethissortofteacherinsideyou,themindisboundtostrayoffthepathandgetintomischief,shopliftingallovertown.”

§“Persistencecomesfromconviction,discernmentfrombeingmindful.”

§“Persistenceinthepracticeisamatterofthemind,andnotofyourposture.Inotherwords,whateveryoudo,keepyourmindfulnessconstantanddon’tletitlapse.Nomatterwhatyouractivity,makesurethemindstickswithitsmeditationwork.”

§“Whenyoustartoutsittinginmeditation,ittakesalongtimeforthemindtosettledown,butassoonasthesessionisoveryougetrightupandthrowitaway.It’slikeclimbingaladderslowly,stepbystep,tothesecondfloor,andthenjumpingoutthewindow.”

§AwomanarmyofficersatinmeditationwithAjaanFuangatWatMakutuntilitseemedthathermindwasespeciallyblissfulandbright.Butwhenshereturnedhome,insteadoftryingtomaintainthatstateofmind,shesataroundlisteningtoafriend’swoesuntilsheherselfstartedfeelingdepressed,too.AfewdayslatershereturnedtoWatMakutandtoldAjaanFuangwhathadhappened.Heresponded,“Youtookgoldandtradeditinforexcrement.”

§Anotherstudentdisappearedforseveralmonths,andonherreturntoldAjaanFuang,“ThereasonIdidn’tshowupisthatmybosssentmetonightschoolforasemester,soIdidn’thaveanytimetomeditateatall.Butnowthatthecourseisover,Idon’twanttodoanythingbutmeditate—nowork,nostudy,justletthemindbestill.”

Shethoughthe’dbepleasedtohearhowintentshestillwasonmeditating,buthedisappointedher.“Soyoudon’twanttowork—that’sadefilement,isn’tit?Whoeversaidthatpeoplecan’tworkandmeditateatthesametime?”

§“Meditatingisn’tamatterofmakingthemindempty,youknow.Themindhastohaveworktodo.Ifyoumakeitempty,thenanything—goodorbad—

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canpopintoit.It’slikeleavingthefrontdoortoyourhomeopen.Anythingatallcancomestrollingrightin.”

§AyoungnursepracticedmeditationwithAjaanFuangseveraldaysrunning,andfinallyaskedhimoneday,“Whywasn’ttoday’ssessionasgoodasyesterday’s?”Heanswered:“Meditatingislikewearingclothes.Todayyouwearwhite,tomorrowred,yellow,blue,whatever.Youhavetokeepchanging.Youcan’twearthesamesetofclothesallthetime.Sowhatevercoloryou’rewearing,justbeawareofit.Don’tgetdepressedorexcitedaboutit.”

§Afewmonthslaterthesamenursewassittinginmeditationwhenasenseofpeaceandclarityinhermindbecamesointensethatshefeltshewouldneverhaveabadmoodinfiltratehermindagain.Butsureenough,badmoodseventuallycamebackasbefore.WhenshementionedthistoAjaanFuang,hesaid,“Lookingafterthemindislikeraisingachild.Therewillhavetobebaddaysalongwiththegood.Ifyouwantonlythegood,you’reinfortrouble.Soyouhavetoplayneutral:Don’tfallinwiththegoodorthebad.”

§“Whenthemeditationgoeswell,don’tgetexcited.Whenitdoesn’tgowell,don’tgetdepressed.Simplybeobservanttoseewhyit’sgood,whyit’sbad.Ifyoucanbeobservantlikethis,itwon’tbelongbeforeyourmeditationbecomesaskill.”

§“Everythingdependsonyourpowersofobservation.Ifthey’recrudeandsloppy,you’llgetnothingbutcrudeandsloppyresults.Andyourmeditationwillhavenohopeofmakingprogress.”

§OnedayayoungwomanwassittinginmeditationwithAjaanFuangandeverythingseemedtogowell.Hermindwasclearandrelaxed,andshecouldcontemplatetheelementsinherbodyashetoldher,stepbystep,withnoproblematall.Butthenextday,nothingwentright.Afterthesessionwasover,heaskedher,“Howdiditgotoday?”

Sheanswered,“YesterdayIfeltasifIweresmart,todayIfeellikeI’mstupid.”Soheaskedherfurther,“Arethesmartpersonandthestupidpersonthesamepersonornot?”

§AstudentcametocomplaintoAjaanFuangthatshehadbeenmeditatingforyears,andstillhadn’tgottenanythingoutofit.Hisimmediateresponse:“Youdon’tmeditateto‘get’anything.Youmeditatetoletgo.”

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§Theseamstress,afterpracticingmeditationwithAjaanFuangforseveralmonths,toldhimthathermindseemedmoreofamessthanitwasbeforeshebeganmeditating.“Ofcourseitdoes,”hetoldher.“It’slikeyourhouse.Ifyoupolishtheflooreveryday,youwon’tbeabletostandtheleastlittlebitofdustonit.Thecleanerthehouse,themoreeasilyyou’llseethedirt.Ifyoudon’tkeeppolishingthemind,youcanletitgooutandsleepinthemudwithoutanyqualmsatall.Butonceyougetittosleeponapolishedfloor,thenifthere’sevenaspeckofdust,you’llhavetosweepitaway.Youwon’tbeabletostandthemess.”

§“Ifyougetexcitedbyotherpeople’sexperiencesinmeditation,it’slikegettingexcitedbyotherpeople’swealth.Andwhatdoyougainfromthat?Payattentiontodevelopingyourownwealthinstead.”

§“Goodwillandcompassion,iftheyaren’tbackedupbyequanimity,cancauseyoutosuffer.That’swhyyouneedtheequanimityofjhanatoperfectthem.”

§“YourconcentrationhastobeRightConcentration:justright,onanevenkeel,allthetime.Whateveryoudo—sitting,standing,walking,lyingdown—don’tletithaveanyupsanddowns.”

§“Concentration:Youhavetolearnhowtodoit,howtomaintainit,andhowtoputittouse.”

§“Onceyoucatchholdofthemind,it’llstayinthepresent,withoutslippingofftothepastorfuture.That’swhenyou’llbeabletomakeitdowhateveryouwant.”

§“Whenyougetsothatyoucatchontothemeditation,it’slikeakitethatfinallycatchesthewind.Itwon’twanttocomedown.”

§Oneevening,afteraworkpartyatWatDhammasathit,AjaanFuangtookhislaystudentsuptothecheditomeditate.Onewomaninthegroupfeltcompletelyexhaustedfromallthework,butjoinedinthemeditationanyway,outofdeferencetohim.Asshesatthere,herawarenessgotweakerandweaker,smallerandsmaller,tothepointwhereshethoughtshewasgoingtodie.AjaanFuanghappenedtowalkpastandsaid,“There’snoneedtobeafraidofdeath.Youdiewitheveryinandoutbreath.”Thisgaveherthestrengthtofightoffherexhaustion,andtocontinuemeditating.

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§“Tomeditateistopracticedying,sothatyou’llbeabletodoitright.”

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Breathing

§WhenmyfathercameforavisittoWatDhammasathit,IgothimtositandmeditatewithAjaanFuang,whileIactedasinterpreter.Beforestarting,myfatheraskedifhisbeingaChristianwouldbeanobstacletothemeditation.AjaanFuangassuredhimthatitwouldn’t:“We’regoingtofocusonthebreath.Thebreathdoesn’tbelongtoBuddhismorChristianityoranyoneelse.It’scommonpropertyallovertheworld,andeveryonehastherighttolookatit.Sotrylookingatthebreathuntilyoucanseeyourownmindandknowyourownmind.Thenthequestionofwhatreligionyoubelongtowon’tbeanissue,becausewecantalkaboutthemindinsteadofdiscussingreligions.Thiswaywecanunderstandeachother.”

§“Whenyoudoanythinginmeditation,relateittothebreath,forthat’sthebasisoftheentireskillwe’redeveloping.”

§"Catchingthemindislikecatchingeels.Ifyousimplyjumpdownintothemudandtrytograbholdofthem,they’llslipoffeverywhichway.Youhavetofindsomethingtheylike—aswhenpeopletakeadeaddog,putitinabigclayjarandthenburyitinthemud.Innotimeatalltheeelscomeswimmingintothejaroftheirownfreewilltofeedoffthedog,andthenallyouhavetodoitputyourhandoverthemouthofthejarandthereyouare:You’vegotyoureels.

“It’sthesamewiththemind.Youhavetofindsomethingitlikes,somakethebreathascomfortableasyoucan,tothepointwhereitfeelsgoodthroughoutthewholebody.Themindlikescomfort,soit’llcomeofitsownfreewill,andthenit’seasytocatchholdofit.”

§“Youhavetoknowthebreathatalltimes,andthenhappinesswillbeyours.Thehumanstate,theheavenlystate,andnibbanaareallhereinthebreath.Ifyougetcarriedawaywithotherthings,happinesswillslipthroughyourfingers,soyouhavetolearnhowtoobservethein-and-outbreathatalltimes.Payattentiontohowit’sgettingalong—don’tleaveittofendforitself.Whenyouknowitswayoflife—sitting,standing,walking,everything—thenyoucangetwhatyouwantfromit.Thebodywillbelight,themindatease,happyatalltimes.”

§“Thebreathcantakeyouallthewaytonibbana,youknow.”

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§“Thefirststepissimplytolookatthebreathasitis.Youdon’thavetogofiddlingaroundwithitalot.Justthinkbud-withthein-breath,anddhowiththeout.Bud-in,dhoout.Don’tforcethebreath,orforcethemindintoatrance.Simplyholdthemindcarefullyrighttherewitheachbreath.”

§“Howdoyouuseyourpowersofobservationtogetacquaintedwiththebreath?Askyourself:Doyouknowthebreath?Isthebreaththere?Ifyoucan’tseewhetherthebreathisforreal,lookfurtherinuntilit’sclearlythere.There’snogreatmysterytoit.It’salwaysreal,rightthere.Theimportantthingiswhetherornotyou’reforreal.Ifyouare,thensimplykeepatit.That’sallthereistoit.Simplykeepbeingreal,beingtrueinwhatyoudo,andyourmeditationwillmakeprogress.It’llgraduallygrowstronger,andthemindwillgrowcalm.Justbeclearaboutwhatyou’redoing.Don’thaveanydoubts.Ifyoucandoubtevenyourownbreath,thentherearenotwowaysaboutit:You’lldoubteverything.Nomatterwhathappens,you’llbeuncertainaboutit.Sobestraightforwardandtrueinwhateveryoudo,foreverythingcomesdowntowhetherornotyou’retrue.”

§“Oncethemindstayswiththebreath,youdon’thavetorepeatbuddhointhemind.It’slikecallingyourwaterbuffalo.Onceitcomes,whykeepcallingitsname?”

§“Makethemindandthebreathoneandthesame.Don’tletthembetwo.”

§“Don’tbeapostplantedinthemud.Haveyoueverseenapostplantedinthemud?Itswaysbackandforthandcanneverstandfirm.Whateveryoudo,befirmandsingle-mindedaboutit.Likewhenyoufocusonthebreath:Makethemindonewithit,likeapostplantedfirmlyinsolidrock.”

§“Holdontothebreaththewayaredantbites:Evenifyoupullitsbodysothatitseparatesfromthehead,theheadwillkeeponbitingandwon’tletgo.”

§WhenIfirstheardAjaanFuangtalkabout“catchinghold”ofthebreath,Ididn’tunderstandhim.I’dsittensingupmybodytocatchholdofit,butthissimplymademefeeltiredandillatease.Thenoneday,asIwasridingthebustoWatMakut,IsatinconcentrationandfoundthatifIletthebreathfollowitsnaturalcourse,itfeltalotmorecomfortable,andthemindwouldn’trunawayfromit.WhenIreachedWatMakut,beingatypicalWesterner,Itookhimtotask,“Whydoyousaytocatchthebreath?Themoreyoucatchit,themoreuncomfortableitis.Youhavetoletitgotoflownaturally.”

Helaughedandsaid,“Thatisn’twhatImeant.To‘catchit’meanstostickwith

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it,tofollowitandtomakesureyoudon’twanderawayfromit.Youdon’thavetosqueezeorforceorcontrolit.Whateverit’slike,justkeeponwatchingit.”

§“Getsothatyoureallyknowthebreath,notjustthatyou’resimplyawareofit.”

§“Observingthebreathisthecause,thepleasurethatarisesistheresult.Focusasmuchasyoucanonthecause.Ifyouignorethecauseandgetcarriedawaywiththeresult,it’llrunoutandyou’llendupwithnothingatall.”

§“Whenyoufocusonthebreath,measurethingsbyhowmuchpleasureyoufeel.Ifboththebreathandthemindfeelpleasant,you’redoingokay.Ifeitherthebreathorthemindfeelsuncomfortable,that’swhenyouhavetomakeadjustments.”

§“Themainthingwhenyoumeditateistobeobservant.Ifyoufeelillatease,changethebreathuntilyoufeelbetter.Ifthebodyfeelsheavy,thinkofspreadingthebreathsothatitfeelslight.Tellyourselfthatthebreathcancomeinandouteveryporeofyourskin.”

§“Whenthebooksaystofocusonthebreathsensationsinthedifferentpartsofthebody,itmeanstofocusonwhateverfeelingsarealreadythereinthebody.”

§“Thebreathcanbearestingplaceforthemind,oritcanbewhatthemindactivelycontemplates.Whenthemindisn’twillingtosettledownandbestill,it’sasignthatitwantsexercise.Sowegiveitworktodo.Wemakeitscanthebodyandcontemplatethebreathsensationsinthedifferentpartstoseehowthey’rerelatedtothein-and-outbreath,toseewheretheenergyflowssmoothlyandwhereit’sblocked.Butmakesurethatyourminddoesn’twanderoutsideofthebody.Keepitcirclingaroundinsideanddon’tletitstopuntilitgetstired.Onceit’stiredyoucanfindaplaceforittorest,andit’llstaytherewithoutyourhavingtoforceit.”

§“Makethebreathviscousandthenthinkofitexplodingtofillthewholebody.”

§AjaanFuangoncetoldastudentwholikedtokeepinshapewithyogaandaerobicexerciseseveryday:“Usethebreathtokeepinshapeinstead.Sitinmeditationandspreadthebreaththroughoutthebody,toeverypart.Themindwillgettrainedandthebodywillbestrongwithnoneedtotieitintoknotsor

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makeitjumparound.”

§AnunwhopracticedmeditationwithAjaanFuanghadhadpoorhealthsinceshewasachild,andwasalwayscomingdownwithonediseaseoranother.AjaanFuangtoldher:“Everymorningwhenyouwakeup,sitandmeditatetogiveyourselfaphysicalexamination,toseewheretheachesandpainsare,andthenuseyourbreathingtotreatthem.Theheavypainswillgrowlighter;thelightoneswilldisappear.Butdon’tmakeabigdealoutofwhetherornottheydisappear.Keeponexaminingthebodyanddealingwiththebreathnomatterwhathappens,becausetheimportantpointisthatyou’retrainingyourmindfulnesstostaywiththebody,tothepointwhereit’sstrongenoughtogoaboveandbeyondpain.”

§“Adjustthebreathuntilit’sperfectlyeven.Ifyouseeawhitelight,bringitintothebodyandletitexplodeouttoeverypore.Themindwillbestill;thebodyweightless.You’llfeelwhiteandbrightallover,andyourheartwillbeatease.”

§“Whenthebreathfillsthebody,it’slikewaterfillingajartothebrim.Eventhoughyoumaytrytopourmoreintoit,that’sallitcantake.It’sjustright,inandofitself.”

§“Meditationneedsrapture—afeelingoffullnessinbodyandmind—asitslubricant.Otherwiseitgetstoodry.”

§“Whenyoumeditateyouhavetoletgoinstages.Likewhentheygointoouterspace:Thespacecapsulehastoletgooftheboosterrocketsbeforeitcanreachthemoon.”

§“Whenthemindisreallyinplaceyoucanletgoofthebreath,anditwon’twanderoffanywhere.It’slikepouringcement:Ifthecementhasn’tset,youcan’tremovetheplywoodforms,butonceit’sset,it’llstaywhereitiswithoutanyneedfortheformsatall.”

§“Spreadthebreathuntilthebodyandmindaresolightthatthere’snosenseofbodyatall—justawarenessitself.Themindwillbeclearlikecrystalcleanwater.Youcanlookdownintothewaterandseeyourownface.You’llbeabletoseewhat’sgoingoninyourmind.”

§“Whenthebreathisfullandstill,youletgoofit.Thenyouthinkofeachoftheotherelementsinthebody—fire,water,andearth—onebyone.When

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they’reallclearyouputthemtogether,i.e.,balancethemsothatthebodyisn’ttoohot,toocold,tooheavytoolight:justrightineveryway.Nowyouletgoofthatandstaywiththespaceelement—afeelingofemptiness.Whenyou’reskilledatstayingwithspace,lookatwhat’ssaying‘space’.Thisiswhereyouturntolookatawarenessitself,theelementofconsciousness.Oncethemindhasbecomeonelikethis,youcanthenletgooftheoneness,andseewhat’sleft.”

“Afteryoucandothis,youpracticegoinginandoutofthevariousstagesuntilyou’reskilledatit,andyoucannoticethevariousmodesofthemindasyoudoit.That’swherediscernmentwillbegintoappear.”

§“Incontemplatingyourself,thesixelementshavetocomefirst.Youtakethemapartandputthembacktogetheragain,aswhenyoulearnyourABC’sandhowtomakethemintowords.Afterawhileyoucanmakeanywordyouwant.”

§“Takeyourtimetomakesurethatthisfoundationissolid.Onceit’ssolid,thennomatterhowmanystoreysyouwanttobuildontopofit,they’llgoupquicklyandstayinplace.”

§“Ifyouweretosayit’seasy,wellyes,it’seasy.Ifyouweretosayit’shard,it’shard.Italldependsonyou.”

§“ThebasicstepsofbreathmeditationthatAjaanLeedescribesinhisMethod2arejustthemainoutlineofthepractice.Asforthedetails,youhavetouseyourowningenuitytoworkvariationsonhisoutlinesothatitfitsyourexperiences.That’swhenyou’llgetresults.”

§“Ifyou’rehavinganyproblemsinyourconcentration,checkwhatyou’redoingagainstthesevenstepsinMethod2.I’vefoundthatifanyonecomestomewithproblemsintheirconcentration,allIhavetodoisapplyoneofthesevensteps.They’rebasictoallmeditation.”

§“Thetextssaythatbreathmeditationisrightforeveryone,butthat’snotreallythecase.Onlyifyou’remeticulouscanyougetresultsfromfocusingonthebreath.”

§“AfamousmeditationteacheroncecriticizedAjaanLee:‘Whydoyouteachpeopletolookatthebreath?Whatistheretolookat?There’sjustinandout.Howaretheygoingtogaindiscernmentfromlookingatjustthat?’Heanswered,‘Ifthat’salltheysee,that’sallthey’llget.’Thisisaquestionthatcomesfromnotknowinghowtolook.”

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§“Peopleofdiscernmentcantakeanythingatallandputittogooduse.”

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VisionsandSigns

§Oneyear--whenAjaanFuangwasseeingaChinesedoctorinBangkokforhisskindiseaseandstayingatWatAsokaram--agroupofnunsandlaypeoplecametopracticemeditationwithhimeverynight.Somemembersofthegroupwouldreporthavingthisorthatvisioninthecourseoftheirmeditation,andfinallyoneofthenunscomplained:“Iknowthatmymindisn’tslippingoffanywhere;it’sstayingrightwiththebreathallthetime,sowhyaren’tIhavinganyvisionslikeeveryoneelse?”

AjaanFuangansweredher,“Doyouknowhowluckyyouare?Withpeoplewhohavevisions,this,that,andtheotherthingisalwayscomingintointerfere.Butyoudon’thaveanyoldkarmatogetinthewayofyourmeditation,soyoucanfocusdirectlyonthemindwithouthavingtogetinvolvedwithanyoutsidethingsatall.”

§“Don’tbeamazedbypeoplewithvisions.Visionsarenothingelsebutdreams.Therearetrueonesandfalseones.Youcan’treallytrustthem.”

§ABangkokhousewifewhowaspracticingmeditationwithAjaanFuangheardsomeofhisotherstudentssaythatmeditationwithoutvisionswasthestraightpath.Itsohappenedthatshehadfrequentvisionsinhermeditation,andsohearingthismadeherwonderwhyherpathwassowindingandconvoluted.WhensheaskedAjaanFuangaboutthis,hetoldher:“Havingvisionsinyourmeditationislikehavinglotsoflushwildgreensgrowingalongthesideofyourpath.Youcangatherthemasyougoalong,sothatyou’llhavesomethingtoeatalongtheway,andyou’llreachtheendofthepathjustlikeeveryoneelse.Asforotherpeople,theymightseethegreenswithoutgatheringthem,ormaynotevenseethematall--becausetheirpathgoesthrougharidland.”

§"Peoplewhopracticeconcentrationfallintotwogroups:thosewhohavesignsviatheeyeswhentheirmindssettledown,andthosewhohavesignsviathebody.Peopleinthefirstgrouparetheoneswhoseevisionsofpeople,animals,whatever.Thoseinthesecondgroupdon’thavevisions,butwhentheirmindssettledown,theirbodieswillfeelunusuallyheavyorlight,largeorsmall,etc.Whenthesepeoplefocusontheelementsintheirbody,they’llnoticethemasfeelings:warmth,coolness,heaviness,spaciousness,andsoforth.

“IfI’mteachingpeoplelikethishowtomeditate,Idon’thavetoworryabout

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themtoomuch,becausetherearen’tmanydangersintheirpath--asidefromthedangeroftheirgettingdiscouragedbecausetheydon’tseeanythinghappeningintheirmeditation.TheonesIworryaboutarethoseinthefirstgroup,becausetheyhavelotsofdangers.Theirvisionscanleadthemtojumptoallsortsoffalseconclusions.Iftheydon’tlearntherightwaytodealwiththeirvisions,they’llgetstuckonthemandneverbeabletoreachanyhigherlevelthanthat.”

§“Visions--orwhateverthingsappearinthecourseofyourmeditation:It’snotthecasethatyoushouldn’tpayanyattentiontothem,forsomekindsofvisionshaveimportantmessages.Sowhenthingslikethisappear,youhavetolookintohowthey’reappearing,whythey’reappearing,andforwhatpurpose.”

§“Peoplewhohavevisionshaveadouble-edgedswordintheirhands,sotheyhavetobecareful.Thethingsthatappearhavetheirusesandtheirdangers.Solearnhowtosqueezeouttheirusesandleavethedangersbehind.”

§UsuallyifanyofAjaanFuang’sstudentssawavisionoftheirownbodyinmeditation,he’dhavethemdivideitupinthevisionintothefourelements--earth,water,wind,andfire--orintoits32basicparts,andthensetfiretoituntilitwasnothingbutashes.Ifthesamevisionreappeared,he’dhavethemdealwithitthesamewayagainuntiltheywerequickatit.Oneofhisstudents,anun,waspracticingthissortofmeditationeveryday,butassoonasshehaddividedthebodyintoits32partsandwasgettingreadytosetfiretoit,anotherimageofherbodywouldappearrightnexttothefirst.Assoonasshewasgettingreadytocrematethesecondone,anotheronewouldappearrightnexttoit,andthenanother,andanother,likefishlineduponaplatterwaitingtobegrilled.Asshelookedatthemshefeltfedupwiththeideaofcontinuing,butwhenshementionedthistoAjaanFuang,hetoldher,“Thewholepurposeindoingthisistogetfedup,butnotfedupwiththedoing.”

§AnothertechniqueAjaanFuangtaughtfordealingwithanimageofone’sownbodywouldbetofocusonwhatitlookedlikethefirstweekinthewomb,thesecondweek,thethird,andsoontothedayofbirth;thenthefirstmonthafterthat,thesecondmonth,thefirstyear,thesecondyear,andsoonupuntiloldageanddeath.Onewomanwastryingthistechnique,butitseemedtooslowtoher,soshefocusedonfive-andten-yearintervalsinstead.WhenAjaanFuangfoundout,hetoldher,“You’reskippingoveralltheimportantparts,”andthenmadeupanewsetofrules:“Thinkofyourheadandthenthinkofpullingoutonehairata

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timeandplacingitinthepalmofyourhand.Seehowmuchyoucanpullout,andthenreplantitonehairatatime.Ifyouhaven’tfinished,don’tleaveyourmeditationuntilyoudo.Ifyouwanttopullitoutinbunches,okay,butyouhavetoreplantitonehairatatime.Youhavetogointothedetailslikethisifyouwanttogainanythinggoodfromit.”

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudentsaskedhim,“WhyisitthattheintuitionsIgetfrommyconcentrationcomeinsuchshortflashes,withoutlettingmecatchthewholepicture?”Heanswered,“Whentheyputarecordonarecordplayer,theneedlehastokeepbearingdowncontinuallyifyou’regoingtohearthewholestory.Ifyoudon’tkeepbearingdown,howcanyouexpecttoknowanything?”

§AnotherstudentwassittinginmeditationwithAjaanFuangwhenshesawanimageofadeadpersoninherconcentration,askingforashareofsomeofthemeritfromherpractice.Thismadeherfeelcreepy,soshetoldAjaanFuang,“There’saghostinfrontofme,ThanPhaw.”

“That’snotaghost,”heresponded.“That’saperson.”“No,it’sreallyaghost,”sheinsisted.

“Ifthat’saghost,”hesaid,“thenyou’reaghost.Ifyouseeitasaperson,thenyoucanbeaperson,too.”

§Afterthathetoldhertospreadthoughtsofgoodwillifshesawanythinglikethatagain,andtheimagewouldgoaway.Sofromthatpointon,that’swhatshe’ddo,atthedropofahat,theminuteshesawanimageofadeadpersoninhermeditation.WhenAjaanFuangfoundoutaboutthis,hetaughther,“Waitaminute.Don’tbeinsuchahurrytogetridofthem.Firstlookatwhatconditionthey’reinandthenaskthemwhatkarmatheydidtobecomethatway.Ifyoudothis,you’llbegintogainsomeinsightintotheDhamma.”

§Severalweekslatershehadavisionofanemaciatedwomanholdingatinychild.Thewomanwaswearingnothingbutdirtyrags,andthechildwascryingwithoutstop.Thestudentaskedthewomaninhervisionwhatshehaddonetobesomiserable,andtheanswerwasthatshehadtriedtohaveanabortion,butbothsheandthechildhaddiedasaresult.Hearingthis,thestudentcouldn’thelpfeelingsorryforthem,butnomatterhowmuchshespreadthoughtsofgoodwilltothem,itdidn’tseemtohelpthematall,becausetheirkarmawassoheavy.Thishadherupset,soshetoldAjaanFuang.Hereplied,“Whetherornottheycanreceiveyourhelpistheirbusiness,andnoneofyours.Differentpeoplehave

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differentkarma,andsomearebeyondhelpforthetimebeing.Yougivewhatyoucan,butyoudon’thavetogobackandmakeanofficialinquiryintohowthingsturnedout.Doyourdutyandleaveitatthat.Theyaskforhelp,yougivethemwhatyoucan.Theyappearforyoutoseesothatyou’lllearnmoreabouttheresultsofkarma.That’senough.Onceyou’refinished,gobacktothebreath.”

§ShekeptfollowingAjaanFuang’sinstructionsuntilonedayitoccurredtoher,“IfIkeepgiving,giving,givinglikethis,willIhaveanythingleftformyself?”WhenshetoldherdoubtstoAjaanFuang,hegaveherablanklookforasecondandthensaid,“Boy,youreallycanbenarrow-heartedwhenyouwanttobe,can’tyou?”Thenheexplained:“Goodwillisn’tathing,likemoney,thatthemoreyougive,thelessyouhave.It’smorelikehavingalitcandleinyourhand.Thispersonaskstolighthiscandlefromyours,thatpersonaskstolighthers.Themorecandlesyoulight,thebrighteritisforeveryone--includingyou.”

§Timepassedandonedayshehadavisionofadeadmanaskinghertotellhischildrenandgrandchildrentomakemeritinsuchandsuchawayandtodedicateittohim.Whensheleftmeditation,sheaskedpermissiontogoinformthedeadman’schildren,butAjaanFuangsaid,“Whatfor?You’renotamailman.Evenifyouwere,hedoesn’thaveanymoneytopayyourwages.Whatkindofproofareyougoingtogivethemthatwhatyousayistrue?Iftheybelieveyou,you’regoingtogetcarriedawayandthinkthatyou’resomespecialkindofpsychic.Everywhereyougo,you’llkeepsmilingthislittlesmiletoyourself.Andiftheydon’tbelieveyou,youknowwhatthey’llsay,don’tyou?”

“What,ThanPhaw?”“They’llsayyou’recrazy.”

§“Therearetruevisionsandfalsevisions.Sowheneveryouseeone,justsitstillandwatchit.Don’tgetpulledintofollowingit.”

§“YoushouldwatchvisionsthesamewayyouwatchTV:Justwatchit,withoutgettingpulledinsidethetube.”

§SomeofAjaanFuang’sstudentswouldhavevisionsofthemselvesortheirfriendsinpreviouslifetimesandgetallexcitedaboutwhattheysaw.Whenthey’dreporttheirvisionstoAjaanFuang,he’dwarnthem,“Youaren’tstillwrappedupinthepast,areyou?You’refoolishifyouare.You’vebeenbornanddiedcountlessaeons.Ifyoutookthebonesofallyourpastbodiesandpiledthemup,they’dbetallerthanMountSumeru.Thewaterinalltheoceansisless

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thanthewaterofthetearsyou’veshedoverallthesufferings,bigandsmall,you’vebeenthrough.Ifyoureflectonthiswithrealdiscernment,you’llfeeldisenchantedwithstatesofbeing,andnolongertakepleasureinbirth.Yourmindwillaimstraightfornibbana.”

§In1976AjaanFuanggainedlargenumbersofnewstudents.Oneofthemwonderedwhythiswasthecase,andsoaskedherselfaboutitinhermeditation.TheanswercametoherthatAjaanFuanghadhadmanychildreninapreviouslifetime,andnowtheyhadbeenrebornashisstudents.Whensheleftmeditation,sheaskedhimwhythiswasso,figuringthathe’dtellherthathehadoncebeenakingwithalargeharem,butinsteadhesaid,“Iwasprobablyafishinthesea,layingwhoknowshowmanyeggsatatime.”

§OneeveningaschoolteacherwasmeditatingathomeandbeganrememberingherpreviouslivesallthewaybacktothetimeofKingAsoka.InhervisionshesawKingAsokabeatingherfathermercilesslyoveratrivialinfractionofpalaceetiquette.ThenextmorningshewenttotellAjaanFuangabouthervision,anditwasobviousthatshewasstillfuriouswithKingAsokaforwhatshehadseenhimdo.AjaanFuangdidn’taffirmordenythetruthofhervision.Instead,hespoketoherangerinthepresent,“Hereyou’vebeencarryingthisgrudgeforover2,000years,andwhereisitgettingyou?Goaskforgivenessofhiminyourmindandhavedonewithit.”

§“It’sgoodthatmostpeoplecan’tremembertheirpreviouslives.Otherwisethingswouldbealotmorecomplicatedthantheyalreadyare.”

§Onewoman,whoatthatpointwasn’tyetastudentofAjaanFuang,waspracticingmeditationathomeonherownwhenshehadavisionofasentence--somewhatlikePali,butnotquite--appearinginhermeditation.Soshecopieditdownandwentfromwattowat,askingvariousmonkstotranslateitforher.Noonecoulduntilshemetonemonkwhotoldherthatitwasinarahantlanguage,andonlyanarahantcouldunderstandwhatitsaid.Thenhehadthegalltotranslateitforher,afterwhichhetoldhertobringhimanyothersentencesshegotfromhervisions,andhe’dtranslatethem,too.

Shewasn’tcompletelyconvincedofwhathehadsaid,andhappenedtomentionittoAjaanFuangwhenshefirstmethim.Hisresponse:“What?Arahantlanguage?Themindsofarahantsareaboveandbeyondconventions.Whatkindoflanguagewouldamindlikethathave?”

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§“Peopleforthemostpartdon’tlikethetruth.Theyprefermake-believeinstead.”

§TherewereoccasionswhensomeofAjaanFuang’sstudentswouldgainknowledgeofonesortoranotherintheirvisions,getcarriedawaywithit,andyethewouldn’ttakethemtotask.Onedaytheseamstressaskedhimwhyhedidn’twarnsuchpeoplethattheirpracticewasgoingoffcourse,andhetoldher,“Youhavetolookathowmaturetheyare.Ifthey’rereallyadults,youcantellthemstraightout.Iftheirmindsarestillinfants,youhavetoletthemplayforawhile,likeachildwithanewtoy.Ifyou’retooharshwiththem,theymightgetdiscouragedandgiveupcompletely.Astheybegintomaturethey’resuretostartseeingforthemselveswhat’sproperandwhat’snot.”

§“Don’thaveanythingtodowiththepastorthefuture.Juststaywiththepresent--that’senough.Andeventhoughthat’swhereyou’resupposedtostay,you’renotsupposedtolatchontoit.Sowhydothinkyoushouldlatchontothingswhereyou’renotevensupposedtostay?”

§“Youknowthatyoushouldn’tbelieveevenyourownvisions,sowhygobelievingthevisionsofothers?”

§“Ifyoucan’tletgoofyourvisions,you’llnevergainrelease.”

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudentsaskedhim,“Whenyouseesomethinginavision,howcanyouknowwhetherit’strueorfalse?”Hisanswer:“Evenwhenit’strue,it’strueonlyintermsofconvention.Youhavetogetyourmindbeyondbothtrueandfalse.”

§“Thepurposeofthepracticeistomaketheheartpure.Alltheseotherthingsarejustgamesandentertainment.”

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RightatAwareness

§“Whateveryouexperience,simplybeawareofit.Youdon’thavetotakeafterit.Theprimalhearthasnocharacteristics.It’sawareofeverything.Butassoonasthingsmakecontact,withinorwithout,theycausealapseinmindfulness,sothatweletgoofawareness,forgetawarenessinandofitself,andtakeonallthecharacteristicsofthethingsthatcomelater.Thenweactoutinlinewiththem—becominghappy,sadorwhatever.Thereasonwe’rethiswayisbecausewetakeconventionaltruthsandlatchontothemtight.Ifwedon’twanttobeundertheirinfluence,we’llhavetostaywithprimalawarenessatalltimes.Thisrequiresagreatdealofmindfulness.”

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudentswasfeelingmistreatedbytheworld,andsowenttohimforconsolation.Hetoldher,“What’stheretofeelmistreatedabout?You’retheonethat’sswayedundertheeventsthathavehityou,that’sall.Contemplatewhat’shappeningandyou’llseethatthemindissomethingseparate.Eventscomepassinginandthengopassingby.Sowhybeinfluencedbythem?Keepyourmindrightatthesimpleawarenessthatthesethingscomeandsoonthey’llbegone,sowhyfollowthem?”

§“What,really,isyours?Whenyoudie,youwon’tbeabletotakeanyofthesethingswithyou,sowhywastetimewantinganything?There’snothingyouhavetowantatall.Makeyourmindquiet.Makeitone.Youdon’thavetoconcernyourselfwithyourownattainmentsorthoseofotherpeople.Simplybeaware.That’senough.”

§“Wheneveranythinghitsyou,letitgoonlyasfaras‘aware’.Don’tletitgoallthewayintotheheart.”

§“Allyouneedtodoiskeepyoursenseofsimpleawarenesssolidandstrong,andnothingwillbeabletooverwhelmyou.”

§“Staywithawarenessitselfatalltimes—exceptwhenyousleep.Theminuteyouwakeup,stayrightatawareness,anditwon’tbelongbeforediscernmentarises.”

§OnewomanwhopracticedmeditationwithAjaanFuangcametofeelthatshehadsplitintotwopeople:onepersonacting,andonewatching.Shefeltthis

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waybothwhilesittinginmeditationandwhileshewasn’t—tothepointwhereshedidn’tfeellikesittinginmeditationatall,becauseshefeltthatsittingandnotsittingwereinnowaydifferent.Sheaskedhimaboutthis,andhetoldher,“Ifyoudon’twantto,youdon’thavetosit.Justkeepthissenseof‘thewatcher’goingatalltimes.Sittingwithyoureyesclosedissimplyanexternalconvention.Justkeepwatching.Whenthemindandthebodybecomeseparatelikethis,thebodycan’tpressonthemind.Ifthebodypressesonthemind,themindwillhavetobeundertheinfluenceofwhatgoesoninthebody.”

§“Rightawarenesshastobepairedwiththebreath.”

§“Tobeawaremeanstobeawareassoonasdefilementarises,toseedefilementandnotactunderitspower.”

§“There’snopasthere,andnofuture,onlythepresent.Noman,nowoman,nosignofanykindatall.There’snothing,notevenself.Whatselfthereis,isonlyinaconventionalsense.”

§“Onceawarenessissolid,youhavetogetaboveandbeyondit.”

§In1978,oneofAjaanFuang’sstudentshadtomovetoHongKong,andsohesetupasmallmeditationcenterthere.InoneofhislettersheaskedAjaanFuangtowriteoutashortoutlineofthemainpointsofthepractice,andthiswastheanswerhereceived:“Focusonallsixoftheelements:earth,water,wind,fire,space,andconsciousness.Whenyou’reacquaintedwitheachofthem,meldthemintoone,andfocusonthemuntiltheygrowstableandstrong.Yourenergywillgathertogetheruntilboththebodyandthemindfeelfull.Whenthephysicalelementsarebalancedandinharmony,they’llgrowfull,andthemindwillletgoofthemonitsownandturntooneness.Theelementswillbeone,themindwillbeone.Sonowyouturnyourattentiontothemind.Focusontheminduntilyoubecomefullyawareofit.Thenletgoofthatawareness,togetherwithwhateverknowledgeyou’vegained,andtherewon’tbeanythingleft.Letgoevenoftheeventsinthepresentthatyou’reawareof.That’swhenintuitivediscernmentwillarise,andmeditationcomestoanend.”

§OnenightAjaanFuangtookagroupofhisstudentsuptositinmeditationatthechediontopofthehillinWatDhammasathit.Lookingouttothesouth,intheinkydarkness,theycouldseethebrightlightsofthefishingboatsfaroutatsea.Hecommented,“Whenyou’reuponahighplacelikethis,youcanseeeverything.”Foronewomanlistening,thishadspecialmeaning,becauseshe

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knewhewasn’treferringjusttotheviewfromthehill.

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Contemplation

§“Everythingthathappenstoyouhasitscauses.Onceyoucontemplateitskillfullyuntilyouknowitscauses,you’llbeabletogetpastit.”

§“Ourdefilementshavemadeussufferenoughalready.Nowit’sourturntomakethemsuffer.”

§Therearetwokindsofpeople:thosewholiketothinkandthosewhodon’t.Whenpeoplewhodon’tliketothinkstartmeditating,youhavetoforcethemtocontemplatethings.Ifyoudon’tforcethem,they’llsimplygetstucklikeastumpinconcentration,andwon’tgetanywhereatall.Asforthosewholiketothink,theyreallyhavetouseforcetogettheirmindstosettledown.Butoncethey’vemasteredconcentration,youdon’thavetoforcethemtocontemplate.Whateverstrikesthemind,they’resuretocontemplateitrightaway."

§“Thediscernmentthatcanletgoofdefilementisaspecialdiscernment,notordinarydiscernment.Itneedsconcentrationasitsbasisifit’sgoingtoletgo.”

§“Forinsighttoarise,youhavetouseyourownstrategies.Youcan’tuseotherpeople’sstrategiesandexpecttogetthesameresultstheydid.”

§“Wheninsightsarise,don’ttrytorememberthem.Ifthey’rerealinsights,they’llstaywithyou.Ifyoutrytomemorizethem,they’llturnintolabelsandconcepts,andwillgetinthewayofnewinsightsarising.”

§AmeditatorinSingaporeoncewrotealettertoAjaanFuang,describinghowheappliedtheBuddha’steachingstoeverydaylife:Whateverhismindfocusedon,hewouldtrytoseeitasinconstant,stressful,andnotself.AjaanFuanghadmewritealetterinresponse,saying,“Dothingseversaythatthey’reinconstant,stressful,andnotself?Theyneversayit,sodon’tgofaultingthemthatway.Focusonwhatlabelsthem,forthat’swherethefaultlies.”

§“Eventhoughyourviewsmayberight,ifyouclingtothemyou’rewrong.”

§ThewifeofaNavylieutenantwasmeditatingathomewhensuddenlyshehadanurgetogiveAjaanFuangagoodtongue-lashing.Nomatterhowmuchshetriedtodrivethethoughtoutofhermind,shecouldn’t.Severaldayslater

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shewenttoaskhisforgiveness,andhetoldher,“Themindcanthinkgoodthoughts,sowhycan’titthinkbadthoughts?Whateverit’sthinking,justwatchit—butifthethoughtsarebad,makesureyoudon’tactinlinewiththem.”

§Ahighschoolstudentoncesaidthatinpracticingmeditation,ifhismindthoughtgoodthoughtshe’dletthempass,butifitthoughtbadthoughtshe’dputastoptothemrightaway.AjaanFuangtoldhim,“Justwatchthem.Seewhoitisthat’sthinkinggoodthoughtsandbadthoughts.Thegoodthoughtsandbadthoughtswilldisappearontheirown,becausetheyfallundertheThreeCharacteristicsofinconstancy,stress,andnot-self.”

§“Ifthemindisgoingtothink,letitthink,butdon’tfallforitsthoughts.”

§“Thedefilementsarelikeduckweed.Youhavetokeeppushingthemoutofthewaysothatyoucanseetheclearwaterunderneath.Ifyoudon’tkeeppushingthemaside,they’llmoveintocoverthewateragain—butatleastyouknowthatthewaterunderneaththemisclear.”

§AwomancomplainedtoAjaanFuangthatshehadbeenmeditatingforalongtimebutstillcouldn’tcutanyofherdefilements.Helaughedandsaid,“Youdon’thavetocutthem.Doyouthinkyoucan?Thedefilementswerepartandparcelofthisworldlongbeforeyoucame.Youweretheonewhocamelookingforthem.Whetherornotyoucome,theyexistontheirown.Andwhosaysthatthey’redefilements?Havetheyevertoldyoutheirnames?Theysimplygotheirownway.Sotrytogetacquaintedwiththem.Seeboththeirgoodandtheirbadsides.”

§OnedayAjaanFuangwasexplainingtoanewstudenthowtowatchthearisingandpassingawayofthedefilements.ItsohappenedthatshewasaveteranreaderofmanyDhammabooks,sosheofferedheropinion:“Insteadofjustlookingatthemthisway,shouldn’tItrytouprootthem?”“Ifallyoucanthinkofisuprootingthem,”hereplied,“theirfruitjustmightfallonthegroundandstartgrowingagain.”

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudentstoldhimthatshehadreachedthepointinhermeditationwhereshefeltindifferenttoeverythingsheencountered.Hewarnedher,“Sure,youcanbeindifferentaslongasyoudon’trunintoanythingthatgoesstraighttotheheart.”

§“Everyoneliveswithsuffering,suffering,suffering,buttheydon’tcomprehendsuffering,whichiswhytheycan’tfreethemselvesfromit.”

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§“Thosewhoknowdon’tsuffer.Thosewhodon’tknowaretheoneswhosuffer.There’ssufferingineverylife—aslongastherearethefivekhandhas,therehastobesuffering—butifyoureallycometoknow,youcanliveinease.”

§“Whenyou’resickyouhaveagoldenopportunity.Youcancontemplatethepainsthatarisefromyourillness.Don’tsimplyliethere.Meditateatthesametime.Contemplatethebehaviorofthepainsastheyarise.Don’tletthemindfallinwiththem.”

§OneofAjaanFuang’sstudentswastakingcobalttreatmentsforcanceruntilshedevelopedanallergicreactiontotheanesthesia.Thedoctorswereatalossastowhattodo,soshesuggestedthattheytrythetreatmentwithouttheanesthesia.Atfirsttheywerereluctanttodoso,butwhensheassuredthemthatshecouldusethepowerofhermeditationtowithstandthepain,theyfinallyagreedtogiveitatry.

AfterthetreatmentAjaanFuangvisitedheratthehospital.Shetoldhimthatshehadbeenabletoconcentratehermindsoastoendurethepain,butithadleftherexhausted.Headvisedher:“Youcanusethepowerofconcentrationtofightoffpain,butitsquandersyourenergy.Youhavetoapproachthepainwithdiscernment,toseethatit’snotyou.It’snotyours.Yourawarenessisonething,thepainissomethingseparate.Whenyoucanseeitinthisway,thingswillbeeasier.”

§SeveralmonthslaterthesamewomanwenttohearafamousBangkokmonkgiveasermononthecycleoflife,death,andrebirthasanoceanofsuffering.Ithadaprofoundeffectonher,andafterwardsshewenttovisitAjaanFuangandtoldhimaboutit.Asshewasspeaking,theimageoftheoceanstruckherassooverwhelmingthattearscametohereyes,sohesaid,“Nowthatyouknowit’sanocean,whydon’tyoujustcrossovertotheotherside?”Thatwasenoughtostophertears.

§“TheBuddhadidn’tteachustocureourpains.Hetaughtustocomprehendthem.”

§“It’struethatillnesscanbeanobstacletoyourmeditation,butifyou’reintelligentenoughtotakeillnessasyourteacher,you’llseethatthebodyisanestofillnesses,andthatyoushouldn’tclingtoitasyours.Youcanthenuproottheattachmentsthatareconcernedaboutthebody—becausenothinginitisyoursatall.It’ssimplyatoolforyoutousetomakegoodkarmaandpayoffyouroldbadkarmadebtsasyouareable.”

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§“Whenyoufocusonseeingpainandstress,youhavetogettothesubtlelevels—tothepointwhereyouseethatstressarisestheinstantyouopenyoureyesandseethings.”

§Adviceforawomanwhohadtolivewithoneillnessafteranother:“Useyourmindfulnesstocontemplatethebodyuntilyoucanvisualizeitasbonesfallingdowninaheap,andyoucansetthemonfireuntilthere’snothingleft.Thenaskyourself:Isthatyourself?Thenwhydoesitmakeyousufferandfeelpain?Isthereany‘you’inthere?KeeplookinguntilyoureachthetruecoreoftheDhamma—untilthere’snothingofyoursatall.Themindwillthenseeitselfasitreallyis,andletgoofitsownaccord.”

§“Tellyourself:ThereasonIstillfeelsufferingisbecauseIstillhavean‘I’.”

§“Thedaywillarrivewhendeathcomestoyou,forcingyoutoletgoofeverythingofeverysort.That’swhyyoushouldpracticelettinggowellinadvancesothatyoucanbegoodatit.Otherwise—letmetellyou—it’sgoingtobedifficultwhenthetimecomes.”

§“Youdon’thavetobeafraidofdeath.You’ddobettertobeafraidofbirth.”

§"Whenyoudiedon’tgetcaughtuponthesymptomsofdying.

§“Liftthemindabovewhatitknows.”

§“Whateverdies,letitdie,butdon’tlettheheartdie.”

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Realization

§Atape-recordedtalkgiventooneofhisstudentswhohadreachedanimpasseinhermeditation.

Oncethemindisfirmlyestablishedinthebreath,youthentrytoseparatethemindfromitsobject—fromthebreathitself.Focusonthis:Thebreathisanelement,partofthewindelement.Awarenessofthebreathissomethingelse.Soyou’vegottwothingsthathavecometogether.Now,whenyoucanseparatethem—throughrealizingthebreath’struenatureasanelement—themindcanstandonitsown.Afterall,thebreathisn’tyou,andyouaren’tthebreath.Whenyoucanseparatethingsinthisway,themindgainspower.It’ssetloosefromthebreath,andiswisetothebreath’severyaspect.Whenmindfulnessisfull,it’swisetoalltheaspectsofthebreath,andcanseparateitselffromthem.

Nowifitsohappensthatyourmindisstrongandyourmindfulnesssharpwhileyou’redoingthis,that’swheninsightoccurs.Theknowledgewillariseinthatmoment,lettingyouknowthatyou’vereallyletgo.Ifyourmindfulnessisstillweak,though,youwon’tbeabletoletgo.Onlywhenyourmindfulnessisreallyresilientwillyouhavemindfulnessandinsightarisingtogether.

Thisissomethingyouhavetokeepcontemplatingwheneveryouhavethechance.Whenyoucanseparatethemindfromitsobjects,it’llbefreedfromallitsburdens.Sofocusyourattentionrightdown,intheareaoftheheart.Keepitfocusedthere,andthenobservethebreathandwhatitisthat’sawareofthebreath.Beasobservantasyoucan,andeventuallyyou’llseethattheyseparatefromeachother.Whenthey’veseparated,thatgivesyouthechancetoinvestigatefurtherinside.Andonceyou’veinvestigatedthisoneelement,you’llfindthatwhatyoulearnappliestoeverythingelse.

Whenyouinvestigatethebreath,you’llfindthatit’snotabeing,notaperson—sowhatistheretolatchonto?Youcan’tlatchontoitasyourself,foritsimplygoesitsownway.Whenyoulookatthebreathyou’llseethatitdoesn’thaveabody—nohead,nolegs,nohands,nofeet,nothingatall.Whenyouseethis,youletgoofit,inlinewiththewayitreallyis.

Thetextssay,‘Cagopatinissaggomuttianalayo’:Youmoveoutofthebreath.Youremoveyourconcernsforit.Youdon’tmakeityourhomeanylonger—becauseit’snotyours.Youletitgoinlinewithitsoriginalnature.Yougiveitback.Whateverit’sgot,yougiveitbacktonature.Alloftheelements—earth,water,wind,fire,andspace—yougivebacktonature.Youletthemreturnto

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whattheyoriginallywere.Whenyouexamineallfiveofthesethings,you’llseethatthey’renotabeing,notaperson,not‘us’,not‘them’.Youletthemallreturntotheiroriginalnatureineveryway.

Thisthenbringsustothemind,whatitisthat’sawareofthesefiveelements.Whatisitgoingtostaywithnow?Turnyourpowersofobservationonthisknowingelementthatisnowstandingonitsown,withnothingelseleft.Examineittoseewhat’swhat,andthat’swhenanotherlevelofinsightwillarise.

Ifyouwanttogaintheinsightthatwillletgoofallthingsinlinewiththeiroriginalnature,therehastobeaspecialrealizationthatarisesintheactoflettinggo.Ifthereisn’tthisrealization,yourlettinggoissimplyanordinary,everydaylabelorperception.It’smundanediscernment.Butwhenthisspecialrealizationarisesintheactoflettinggo—theinstantyouletgo,theresultcomesrightbackatyou,verifying,certifyingwhat’shappenedforwhatitreallyis:Youknow.You’veletgo.Youthenexperiencethepuritywithinyou.

Thisiscalledtranscendentdiscernment.Whentherealizationariseswithinyou,verifyingwhatyou’veseenandwhatyou’vedone,that’scalledtranscendentdiscernment.Aslongasthisrealizationdoesn’tarise,yourdiscernmentisstillmundane.Soyoukeepworkingatyourinvestigationintothingsuntilalltheconditionsareripe.Thenwhenthey’reripe,there’snothingmoreyouhavetodo,fortranscendentdiscernmentpenetratesthingscompletelytheveryinstantitarises.It’snotlikemundanediscernmentatall.

Thepathwefollow,then,istobeobservant,toinvestigatethings.Keepmakingafocusedinvestigationuntilyoureachthestrategicpoint.Whenthemindreachesthatpoint,itletsgoonitsown.Whathappensisthatitreachesapointoffullness—theDhammawithinitisfull—anditletsgo.Onceitletsgo,theresultswillappearimmediately.

So.Keeponpracticing.There’snothingtobeafraidof.You’llhavetoreapresults,there’snodoubtaboutit.Youreapresultsallalongtheway.Likerightnow,whileyou’resittinginmeditationhere.Youknowthatthebreathandthemindarecomfortablewitheachother.That’saresultofthepractice.Eventhoughyouhaven’tyetreachedtheendofthepath,you’restillgainingasenseofcomfortandeaseinyourmeditation.Themindisatpeacewiththein-and-outbreath.Aslongasthemindandbreathcan’tseparatefromeachother,theyhavetohelpeachotheralong.Themindhelpsthebreath,andthebreathhelpstheminduntiltheycangetfullyacquainted.Oncethemindgetsfullyacquainted,itcanletgo.Whenitknows,itletsgo.Aslongasitdoesn’treallyknow,itwon’treallyletgo.

Whatthismeansisthatyouhavetoassociatewiththebreath,spendtime

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withit,andgraduallycometoknowit.Asthemindgetsmoreandmoreacquainted,itwillbeabletounravelitsattachmentstobody,feelings,perceptions,thought-constructs,andconsciousness.Itsidentity-views—seeingthesethingsastheself—willfallaway.Thisisthewaytofreedom.Themomentthistranscendentdiscernmentarises,you’llbefree.You’llbeabletodisentangleyourselffromalltheconventionaltruthsoftheworldthatsay,‘person’,‘self’,‘man’,‘woman’,‘us’,‘them’,andsoon.

Butaslongasyoucan’tyetletgo,youstillhavetodependonthesethings.They’reyourrestingspots,butnotyourrefuge.Yousimplyleanoneachother,andhelpeachotheralong,sothatyoucanmakeprogressonyourway.Youcan’tabandonthesethings,forthey’rethepathofyourpractice.Aslongasyoustickwiththepractice,youwon’tfallback.Butassoonasyouletuponthepractice,you’llstartback-slidingimmediately.You’llfallpreytodoubts,wonderingwhetherornottheDhammaistrue.

Youhavetokeepbeingobservantofthemind:awarenessitself.It’snotthecasethatthemindisn’taware,youknow.Itsbasicnatureisawareness.Justlookatit.It’sawareofeverything—aware,butitcan’tyetletgoofitsperceptions,oftheconventionsitholdstobetrue.Soyouhavetofocusyourinvestigationonin.Focusoninuntilthemindanditsobjectsseparatefromeachother.Simplykeepatit.Ifyou’repersistentlikethis,withoutlet-up,yourdoubtswillgraduallyfadeaway,fadeaway,andeventuallyyou’llreachyourtruerefugewithinyou,thebasicawarenesscalledbuddhathatseesclearlythrougheverything.ThisistheBuddha,Dhamma,andSanghaappearingwithinyouasyourultimaterefuge.

Thisiswhenyou’llknowwhat’sactuallywithin,what’sactuallywithout,what’sactuallyarestingspot,andwhat’sreallyyourrefuge.You’llbeabletodistinguishthesethings.

Thingsoutsidearesimplyrestingspots.Likethebody:It’sarestingspot.Forthebriefmomentthattheelementsofearth,water,wind,andfirestaybalancedtogether,youcanrestwiththebody.Butasforyourtruerefuge,you’vealreadyseenit.It’sthisbasicawarenessitself,withinthemind.Yourawarenessofthebreathisarefugeononelevel.Whenitseparatesfromthebreath,it’sarefugeonanotherlevel.Andasforyourtruerefuge—buddha—that’stheawarenessthatliesfurtherwithin.Onceyourealizethis,that’sallthereis.It’ssovereigninandofitself.Itknowsclearlyandtruly,allaround.That’sthetruerefugewithinyou.

Asforthingsoutside,they’rejusttemporarysupports,thingsyoucandependonforalittlewhile,likeacrutch.Aslongasthere’sthebreathtokeepthemalive,youmakeuseofthem.Whenthere’snomorebreath,that’stheendofthe

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problem.Thephysicalelementsseparateandnolongerdependoneachother,sothemindreturnstoitsowntruerefuge.Andwhereisthat?Justwhereisthatbuddhaawareness?Whenwe’vetrainedthemindtobeitsownrefuge,therewillbenosorrowatthatmomentinthemeditatingheart.

TheBuddha’sownsearchwasforthisrefuge.Hetaughtallofhisdisciplestotakerefugeinthemselves,forwecandependonothersonlyforalittlewhile.Otherpeoplemerelyshowustheway.Butifyouwantwhat’sreallytrueandgoodinlife,youhavetodependonyourself—teachyourself,trainyourself,dependonyourselfineveryway.Yoursufferingscomeeventuallyfromyou.Yourhappiness,eventuallyfromyou.It’slikeeating:Ifyoudon’teat,howareyougoingtogetfull?Ifyouleaveituptootherpeopletoeat,there’snowayyou’regoingtogetfull.Ifyouwanttobefull,youyourselfhavetoeat.It’sthesamewiththepractice.

Youcan’tletyourselflatchontothingsoutsideyou.Thingsoutsideareinconstant.Impermanent.Undependable.Theychangewitheveryin-and-outbreath.Thisholdsnotonlyforyou,butforeveryone.Ifyoudon’tpartfromoneanotherwhileyou’restillalive,youpartwhenyoudie.Youpartfromthingswitheveryin-and-outbreath.Youcan’tbasethemeaningofyourlifeonthesethings—andyoudon’thaveto.Youcansimplytellyourselfthatthisisthewaythingsareallovertheworld.Theworldoffersnothinglasting.Wedon’twantthingstobethatway,butthat’sthewaytheyare.Theydon’tlieunderanyone’scontrolatall.Thisistruenotonlywiththingsoutside,butalsowiththingswithinyou.Youwantthebodytostayalive,youdon’twantittodie,butit’sgoingtodie.Youdon’twantittochange,butitchanges,constantly.

Thisiswhyyouhavetogetyourmindinshapesothatitcantakerefugeinitself,inlinewiththeprinciplesoftheskilltheBuddhataught.Andyoudon’thavetofeeldoubtsaboutthepractice,forallthequalitiesyouneedtodevelopinthepracticearealreadypresentwithinyou.Allformsofgoodandevilarepresentwithinyou.Youalreadyknowwhichpathisthegoodone,whichpathistheshoddyone,soallyouhavetodoistrainyourhearttoholdontothegoodpath.Stopandtakealookatyourselfrightnow:Areyouontherightpath?Whateveriswrong,don’tlatchontoit.Letgoofit.Past,future,whatever,letgoofit,leavingonlythepresent.Keepthemindopenandateaseinthepresentatalltimes,andthenstartinvestigating.

Youalreadyknowthatthingsoutsidearen’tyouoryours,butinsideyoutherearemanylevelsyouhavetoexamine.Manylevelsyouhavetoexamine.Eventhemindisn’treallyyours.Therearestillinconstantandstressfulthingsinsideit.Sometimesitwantstodothis,sometimestodothat,it’snotreallyyours.Sodon’tgettooattachedtoit.

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Thought-constructsarethebigissue.Sometimestheyformgoodthoughts,sometimesevilthoughts,eventhoughyouknowbetter.Youdon’twanttothinkthosethings,andyettheykeepappearinginthemind,inspiteofyourintentions.Soyouhavetoregardthemasnotbeingyours.Examinethem.There’snothingdependableaboutthem.Theydon’tlast.They’reimpersonalevents,soletthemgoinlinewiththeirownnature.

Andwhatistherethat’slasting,solid,dependable,andtrue?Keeplookingonin.Focusyourmindfulnessonthebreath,andaskyourselfrightthere.Eventuallyyou’llcometoseewhat’swhatwithinyou.Wheneveryouhaveanydoubtsorproblemsinthepractice,focusdownonthebreathandaskthemindrightthere,andunderstandingwillarise,toloosenupyourwrongviewsandhelpyoupastyourimpasse.

Buteventhisunderstandingisinconstant,stressful,andnot-self.Sabbedhammaanatta:Everythingthatarises,theBuddhasaid,isinconstantandnotself.Eventheunderstandingsthatariseinthemindaren’tconstant.Sometimestheyarise,sometimestheydon’t.Sodon’tgettooattachedtothem.Whentheyarise,takenoteofthem,andthenletthemfollowtheirowncourse.LetyourviewsbeRightViews:i.e.,justright,notgoingoverboard.Ifyougooverboardwiththem,youlatchontighttothem,andthentheyturnwrongonyou,foryou’velostsightofwhatyou’redoing.

Whatthisallboilsdowntoisthatthemoremindfulnessinyourpractice,thebetter.Asyourmindfulnessgetsmoreandmoremature,moreandmorecomplete,itturnsintosomethingtranscendent.Thetranscendentdiscernmentwementionedabovearisesfromthepowerofyourmindfulnessasitbecomesmoreandmorecomplete.

Sokeeptrainingyourmindfulnessuntilit’sGreatMindfulness.Trytokeepitconstant,persistent,andfocused,untilyouseeallthingsforwhattheyare.That’showyou’lladvanceintheBuddha’steachings.

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Release

§“Ourpracticeistogoagainstthestream,againsttheflow.Andwherearewegoing?Tothesourceofthestream.That’sthe‘cause’sideofthepractice.The‘result’sideisthatwecanletgoandbecompletelyatease.”

§“Thestagesofthepractice...Actuallythedifferentstagesdon’tsaywhattheyare.Wesimplymakeupnamesforthem.Aslongasyoustaystuckonthesemade-upnames,you’llnevergetfree.”

§“Whenteachingpeople,youhavetoteachtheminlinewiththeirtemperamentsandaptitudes,buteventuallytheyallcometothesamepoint:lettinggo.”

§“Nibbanaissubtleandtakesalotofdiscernment.It’snotsomethingthattheforceofdesirecanreach.Ifwecouldgettherethroughtheforceofdesire,everyoneintheworldwouldhavegottentherebynow.”

§“Somepeopletalkabout,‘temporarynibbana,temporarynibbana,’buthowcannibbanabetemporary?Ifit’snibbana,ithastobeconstant.Ifit’snotconstant,it’snotnibbana.”

§“Whentheysaythatnibbanaisempty,theymeanthatit’semptyofdefilement.”

§“Rightwherethere’snoonetobepained,noonetodie.Rightthere.It’sineachandeveryperson.It’sasifyourhandwerepalm-down,andyouturnitpalm-up—butonlypeopleofdiscernmentwillbeabletodoit.Ifyou’redense,youwon’tseeit,youwon’tcatchontoit,youwon’tgobeyondbirthanddeath.”

§"Theheartwhenit’sreleasedislikethefireelementintheair.Whenfiregoesout,itisn’tannihilatedanywhere.Itstillpermeatesspace,simplythatitdoesn’tlatchontoanykindling,soitdoesn’tappear."Whenthemind‘goesout’fromdefilement,it’sstillthere,butwhennewkindlingcomes,itdoesn’tcatchfire,doesn’tlatchon—noteventoitself.

“That’swhat’scalledrelease.”

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Glossary

Abhidhamma:ThethirdofthethreecollectionsformingthePalicanon,composedofsystematictreatisesbasedonlistsofcategoriesdrawnfromtheBuddha’steachings.

Ajaan:Teacher;mentor.

Apadana(Avadana):TalesrecordedinalatesectionofthePalicanon,claimingthattheBuddhaandhisdisciplesembarkedontheirpathtoAwakeningbymakingagifttoanearlierBuddhaanddedicatingthemeritofthegifttoaparticulartypeofAwakening.

Arahant:AWorthyOneorPureOne,i.e.,apersonwhoseheartisfreedfromtheeffluentsofmentaldefilement,andwhoisthusnotdestinedforfurtherrebirth.AnepithetfortheBuddhaandthehighestlevelofhisNobleDisciples.

Brahma:Aninhabitantofthehigherheavensofformandformlessness,apositionearned--butnotforever--throughthecultivationofvirtueandmeditativeabsorption(jhana),alongwiththeattitudesoflimitlesslove,compassion,appreciation,andequanimity.

Buddho:Awake--anepithetoftheBuddha.

Chedi:Aspiredmonument,containingrelicsoftheBuddhaorhisdisciples,objectsrelatedtothem,orcopiesofBuddhistscriptures.

Dhamma(dharma):TheteachingsoftheBuddha;thepracticeofthoseteachings;thereleasefromsufferingattainedasaresultofthatpractice.

Jataka:TalesrecordedintheBuddhistCanon,saidtodealwiththeBuddha’spreviouslives.

Jhana:Meditativeabsorptioninasinglesensationormentalnotion.

Karma(kamma):Intentionalact--inthought,wordordeed--holdingconsequencesforthedoeroftheactbasedonthequalityoftheintention.

Khandha:Heaporaggregate.Thefivekhandhasarethecomponentpartsofsensoryexperience,thebasisforone’ssenseof“self”.Theyare:physicalformorsensedata;feelings;perceptionsandmentallabels;thought-constructs;andsensoryconsciousness(themindbeingcountedasthesixthsense).

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Nibbana(nirvana):Liberation.Theextinguishingofpassion,aversion,anddelusioninthemind,resultingincompletefreedomfromsufferingandstress.

Pali:TheoldestrecensionoftheBuddhistCanon;also,thelanguageofthatrecension.

Parami:Perfection;tenqualitieswhosedevelopmentleadstoAwakening:generosity,virtue,renunciation,discernment,persistence,endurance,truthfulness,determination,goodwill,andequanimity.

Sangha:ThecommunityoftheBuddha’sfollowers.Ontheconventionallevel,thisreferstotheBuddhistmonkhood.Ontheideallevel,itreferstothoseoftheBuddha’sfollowers--whetherlayorordained--whohavepracticedtothepointofgainingatleastofthefirstofthetranscendentqualitiesculminatinginLiberation.TheBuddha,Dhamma,andSanghatogetherarecalledtheTripleGem.TakingrefugeintheTripleGem--takingthemastheultimateguidesinone’slife--iswhatmakesoneaBuddhist.

Sumeru:Amythicalmountain,tremendouslytall,saidtolieatthecenteroftheuniverse,northoftheHimalayas.

ThanPhaw:Reverendfather.AtermofrespectandaffectionusedforseniormonksinsoutheasternThailand.

Vessantara:TheBuddhainhisnext-to-lastlifetime,inwhichheperfectedthevirtueofgenerositybygivinguphiskingdom,togetherwiththethingshelovedmost:hischildrenandhiswife.

Wat:Monastery;temple.

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Appendix:TheSevenSteps

§From:KeepingtheBreathinMind,byAjaanLee.

THEREARESEVENBASICSTEPS:

1.Startoutwiththreeorsevenlongin-and-outbreaths,thinkingbud-withthein-breath,anddhowiththeout.Keepthemeditationsyllableaslongasthebreath.

2.Beclearlyawareofeachin-and-outbreath.

3.Observethebreathasitgoesinandout,noticingwhetherit’scomfortableoruncomfortable,broadornarrow,obstructedorfree-flowing,fastorslow,shortorlong,warmorcool.Ifthebreathdoesn’tfeelcomfortable,changeituntilitdoes.Forinstance,ifbreathinginlongandoutlongisuncomfortable,trybreathinginshortandoutshort.Assoonasyoufindthatyourbreathingfeelscomfortable,letthiscomfortablebreathsensationspreadtothedifferentpartsofthebody.

Tobeginwith,inhalethebreathsensationatthebaseoftheskullandletitflowallthewaydownthespine.Then,ifyouaremale,letitspreaddownyourrightlegtothesoleofyourfoot,totheendsofyourtoes,andoutintotheair.Inhalethebreathsensationatthebaseoftheskullagainandletitspreaddownyourspine,downyourleftlegtotheendsofyourtoes,andoutintotheair.(Ifyouarefemale,beginwiththeleftsidefirst,becausethemaleandfemalenervoussystemsaredifferent.)Thenletthebreathfromthebaseoftheskullspreaddownoverbothshoulders,pastyourelbowsandwrists,tothetipsofyourfingers,andoutintotheair.

Letthebreathatthebaseofthethroatspreaddownthecentralnerveatthefrontofthebody,pastthelungsandliver,allthewaydowntothebladderandcolon.Inhalethebreathrightatthemiddleofthechestandletitgoallthewaydowntoyourintestines.

Letallthesebreathsensationsspreadsothattheyconnectandflowtogether,andyou’llfeelagreatlyimprovedsenseofwell-being.

4.Learnfourwaysofadjustingthebreath:

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a.inlongandoutlong,b.inlongandoutshort,c.inshortandoutlong,d.inshortandoutshort.

Breathewhicheverwayismostcomfortableforyou.Or,betteryet,learntobreathecomfortablyallfourways,becauseyourphysicalconditionandyourbreatharealwayschanging.

5.Becomeacquaintedwiththebasesorfocalpointsforthemind—therestingspotsofthebreath—andcenteryourawarenessonwhicheveroneseemsmostcomfortable.Afewofthesebasesare:

a.thetipofthenose,b.themiddleofthehead,c.thepalate,d.thebaseofthethroat,e.thebreastbone(thetipofthesternum),f.thenavel(orapointjustaboveit).

Ifyousufferfromfrequentheadachesornervousproblems,don’tfocusonanyspotabovethebaseofthethroat.Anddon’ttrytoforcethebreathorputyourselfintoatrance.Breathefreelyandnaturally.Letthemindbeateasewiththebreath—butnottothepointwhereitslipsaway.

6.Spreadyourawareness—yoursenseofconsciousfeeling—throughouttheentirebody.

7.Unitethebreathsensationsthroughoutthebody,lettingthemflowtogethercomfortably,keepingyourawarenessasbroadaspossible.Onceyouarefullyawareoftheaspectsofthebreathyoualreadyknowinyourbody,you’llcometoknowallsortsofotheraspectsaswell.Thebreath,byitsnature,hasmanyfacets:breathsensationsflowinginthenerves,thoseflowingaroundandaboutthenerves,thosespreadingfromthenervestoeverypore.Beneficialbreathsensationsandharmfulonesaremixedtogetherbytheirverynature.

TOSUMMARIZE:

(a)forthesakeofimprovingtheenergyalreadyexistingineverypartofyourbody,sothatyoucancontendwithsuchthingsasdiseaseandpain;and(b)forthesakeofclarifyingtheknowledgealreadywithinyou,sothatitcanbecomeabasisfortheskillsleadingtoreleaseandpurityofheart—youshouldalwaysbearthesesevenstepsinmind,becausetheyareabsolutelybasictoevery

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aspectofbreathmeditation.

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TableofContents

Cover 1Titlepage 2Copyright 3Introduction 4MindWhatYouSay 9MindWhatYouEat 13PeoplePracticingtheDhamma 15Merit 20Student/Teacher 23LivingintheWorld 25TheCelibateLife 30Meditation 35Breathing 41VisionsandSigns 47RightatAwareness 53Contemplation 56Realization 60Release 65Glossary 66Appendix:TheSevenSteps 68

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