AVOIDING ILLOGICAL SHIFTS

A shift is a sudden, unexpected change in I. person or number (pronoun)II. verb tenseIII. voiceIV. mood V. AND HOW TO CORRECT THEM

In a shift in person,the references to yourself,

your audience, or the people you are writing about are inconsistent. Pay special attention to pronouns.

EXAMPLE: When people study a foreign

language, you also learn about another culture.

How to correct it: When people study a foreign

language, youthey also learn about another culture.

Refer to yourself, your audience, and the people you are writing about in a consistent way.

If you begin with a pronoun in first, second, or third person, change any inconsistent pronouns to match.

In a shift in verb tense,the verb tenses are

inconsistent when the meaning of the sentence does not require you to change tenses.

EXAMPLE:The virus mutated so quickly

that it develops a resistance to most vaccines.

(The verb tense shifts from past to present.)

In a shift in verb tense,Notice that sometimes the

meaning requires you to change verb tenses in a sentence. The following sentence is correct because the meaning requires a change in verb tense:

EXAMPLE:Last spring, robins built the

nest that the blue jays now call home.

How to correct it: The virus mutatedmutates so

quickly that it develops a resistance to most vaccines.

Maintain consistency in verb tense throughout a paragraph or essay, unless the meaning requires you to change tenses.

Change any inconsistent tenses to match the appropriate time frame.

In a shift in voice,the writer needlessly uses

both the active and the passive voice, which results in disorienting and wordy sentences.

EXAMPLE:One group of volunteers was

given a placebo, and the researchers treated another group with the new drug.

(The first clause is in the passive voice, and the second clause is in the active voice.)

How to correct it: One group of volunteers was given

a placebo, and/ The researchers gave one group of volunteers a placebo, and the researchers treated another group with the new drug.

Use a consistent voice. To change a sentence from the

passive voice to the active voice, make the subject of the sentence the performer of the action.

A shift in moodoccurs when the writer

moves among commands or directions; statements or questions; and wishes, suggestions, or conditions contrary to fact.

Keep your goal in mind, and you need to practice, practice, practice.

(The first clause is a direction, and the second is a statement.)

How to correct it:Keep your goal in mind, and

you need to practice, practice, practice.

Use a consistent mood throughout a paragraph or an essay.

MoodMood reveals the writer's intentions and attitude, which affects the tone of the paper. IndicativeImperativeSubjunctive or Conditional

Indicative mood makes a statement, delineates a fact or opinion, or asks a question.

Incorrect: The stars are creating light

from hydrogen, helium and other elements that ignite in a nuclear reaction that can be seen in the night sky.

Correct: The stars are twinkling in the

sky.

Imperative mood gives a command, offers advice, or makes a request.

Incorrect: "Bring the papers to my

office and will you place them on my desk?"

Correct: "Bring the papers to my

office, and place them on the desk."

Subjunctive, or conditional, mood expresses a wish, hypothesis, suggestion, condition contrary to fact, or requirement.

Incorrect: If I was president, I would

introduce a new economic policy.

Correct: If I were president, I would

introduce a new economic policy.

→ It is possible and also very likely that the condition will be fulfilled.

Form: if + Simple Present, will-Future

Example: If I find her address, I’ll send her an invitation.

→ It is possible but very unlikely, that the condition will be fulfilled.

Form: if + Simple Past, Conditional I (= would + Infinitive)

Example: If I found her address, I would send her an invitation.

→ It is impossible that the condition will be fulfilled because it refers to the past.

Form: if + Past Perfect, Conditional II (= would + have + Past Participle)

Example: If I had found her address, I would have sent her an invitation.

Sources: a handout by Bedford/St. Martin’s, 2010. Hughes, Neil. (Feb. 1993). Handouts about

Revision.

jms2013

1. She was shocked when she hears the news.2.  Anne will sing tomorrow night, exactly five days

after she confirmed the rumors.3. If one practices before a performance, you will

decrease the chance of committing a mistake.4. We rode a train to the theater, then we were given

a ride by our friend on our way home.5. If a government official finds themselves in a

controversy, he should settle the matter.6. When one watches such a great movie, you will

have a sense of satisfaction.7. One should sift the flour before they make the pie.8. Ping made the plans for the project, and the

program was also continued.9. Laila delivered the products, inspected the

damage, and had written a report.10.Open the lid and then alcohol should be used to

clean the parts.

1. The dog walks to the table. Then, he circled it and sits in front of the television.

2. When Janet became the president of the organization, she is the first woman to hold that title in the government.

3. Last year, she was a rich woman. Now, she is a convicted felon.

4. The soldiers were told that you had to stay in the camp.

5. Anyone can learn to play an instrument if you practice.

6. Each visitor to the exhibit should surrender their gadgets at the entrance.

7. After the police finished the investigation, a report was submitted about their findings.

8. If the people had actually seen what happened, they would have been shocked.

9. That cat would bite you if you pick her up.