AnilKumarConfidare IndiaSaveIndianfamilyFoundationBANGALORE(INDIA)

500,000marriagesofyoungcouplesarebreakingperyear.

Ittakes7yearstogetcontesteddivorceinfamilycourt.

DomesticViolence(DV)Lawsexcludemen.

Estimated30millionmenand100millionwomenhavefacedDV.

LackofdueprocessincourtsandfalseallegationsofDomesticviolenceandSection377areverycommon.

Ifamanandhisfamilyareaccusedofdomesticviolenceordemandofdowry,theyarepresumedguilty.

Theentirefamilyincludingtheman’sparentsandsiblingsusedtobesenttoprison(in2005).

Everyyear200,000menand35000womenusedtobearrested.

ManyWesterncountrieshadissuestravelwarningstotheircitizenstravelingtoIndiatogetmarried.

During2003-2007,morethan100Helplines formenarecreatedforhelpingmalevictimsofdomesticviolenceandfalseallegations.

Everyweekendsupportgroupmeetingsareorganizedinmorethan20cities.FormalLifeCoachingisprovidedinsomecities.

Coachesarealsoexpertsinlawsandcourtprocesses.

Howdoeshefeel?Hefeelssadness

Heisscared

Hefeelsfrustrationandanger.

Hefeelshelpless

Hehasthoughtsracinginhismindandhesuffersfromanxiety

Relationshipbetweencoachandtheperson.

Listeningtotheguy

Askinghim,whatdoeshewant?

Workingwithalotofcompassion

Basicinstructionstoreducestressanddealwithemergencies.

Excitingandalsoabitchallenging

A Victim(in a state of victimhood) Empowered Man

6blindmenwenttoanelephant

Coachingtheguytogetusedtouncertainty.

Dealingwiththequestion,“Whyme?”Enablinghimhownottobeaniceguyonceinawhile.Reducingexpectationsfromlifeandgettingreadyfortheworst.FreeingfromSouthIndianMonkeyTrapanddealingwithvaluerigidity

Andstopresistinglife

Freedomfromsuffering

Holding onto anger is like drinking poison And expecting the other person to die.

An attitude of gratitude towards life.

Tryingtofixsituationcanworsenit.

Acceptance

BeingPatient

ReducingexpectationsandattachmentsinLife.

BeingPeaceful

TakingResponsibilityforoneselfandothers