strategic living seminar full

Strategic Living

...because life is not an accident

Seminar Outline

1. Accidental & Strategic Living

2. What is mental health?

3. How can things go wrong?

4. Ideas & Strategies

5. The Health Motivations Quadrant

6. Vehicles & Education

7. Where to from here?

Three Foundational Ideas

1. Everyone wants to be happy

2. Everyone is doing the best they know how

3. Very few people are as happy as they would like to be

1. Accidental vs Strategic Living

Think back 10 years...

2. What is mental health?

Brain or mind?

7 Effectiveness Habits: Independence

The First Three Habits surround moving from dependence to independence (i.e., self-mastery):

Habit 1: Be ProactiveTake initiative in life by realizing that your decisions (and how they align with

life's principles) are the primary determining factor for effectiveness in your life. Take responsibility for your choices and the consequences that follow.

Habit 2: Begin with the End in MindSelf-discover and clarify your deeply important character values and life goals.

Envision the ideal characteristics for each of your various roles and relationships in life.

Habit 3: Put First Things FirstA manager must manage his own person. Personally. And managers should

implement activities that aim to reach the second habit. Covey says that rule two is the mental creation; rule three is the physical creation.

7 Effectiveness Habits: Interdependence

The next three habits talk about Interdependence (e.g. working with others):

Habit 4: Think Win-WinGenuinely strive for mutually beneficial solutions or agreements in

your relationships. Value and respect people by understanding a "win" for all is ultimately a better long-term resolution than if only one person in the situation had got his way.

Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to be UnderstoodUse empathic listening to be genuinely influenced by a person, which

compels them to reciprocate the listening and take an open mind to being influenced by you. This creates an atmosphere of caring, and positive problem solving.

Habit 6: SynergizeCombine the strengths of people through positive teamwork, so as to

achieve goals no one person could have done alone.

7 Effectiveness Habits: Continuous Improvement

The final habit is that of continuous improvement in both the personal and interpersonal spheres of influence.

Habit 7: Sharpen the Saw

Balance and renew your resources, energy, and health to create a sustainable, long-term, effective lifestyle. It primarily emphasizes exercise for physical renewal, prayer (meditation, yoga, etc.) and good reading for mental renewal. It also mentions service to society for spiritual renewal.

The Importance of Balance

Balance in Life

Deficits or Assets?

“An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”

Benjamin Franklin

Assets-Based Approaches

• Not concerned with diagnosing and treating disease

• Measuring health

• Predictive capacity

The Developmental Assets Framework www.search-institute.org

External Assets• Support• Empowerment• Boundaries and Expectations• Constructive Use of Time

Internal Assets• Commitment to Learning• Positive Values• Social Competencies• Positive Identity

Assets in the Real World

0–10 Assets

15%

31–40 Assets

9%21–30

Assets

35%

11–20

Assets

41%

The Power of Assets to Promote

11%

27%

38%

80%

26%

49%

73%

91%

0%

10%

20%

30%

40%

50%

60%

70%

80%

90%

100%

0-10 11-20 21-30 31-40

Succeeds in School

Maintains Good Health

51% A's

80%A's& B's

The Power of Assets to Protect

58%

34%

16%

5%

56%

26%

10%

2%

50%

24%

8%

2%

28%

8%

4%2%

11%

4%2% 1%

0%

10%

20%

30%

40%

50%

60%

70%

80%

90%

100%

0-10 11-20 21-30 31-40

Number of Assets

Alcohol

Tobacco

Marijuana

School Truancy

Eating Disorder

Conflict Resolution

Conflict Styles

• Withdrawing

• Forcing

• Smoothing

• Compromising

• Confronting

Withdrawing (avoiding)

• Withdraws into shell to avoid conflicts

• Gives up their personal goals and relationships

• Stays away from the issues over which conflict is taking place and from

the people they are in conflict with

• Believes it is hopeless to try to resolve conflicts, feels helpless

• Believes it is easier to withdraw – physically and psychologically – from a

conflict than face it.

Forcing (competing)

• Tries to overpower opponents - forcing

them to accept their solution

• Their own goals highly important to them -

relationships of minor importance

• Seeks to achieve goals at all costs -

not concerned with needs of others

• Doesn’t care if others like or accept him/her

• Assumes conflicts settled by one winning and one losing -

wants to be the winner

Forcing (competing)

• Winning gives a sense of pride and achievement

• Losing gives a sense of weakness, inadequacy

and failure

• Tries to win by attacking, overpowering,

overwhelming and intimidating other.

Smoothing (accommodating)

• Considers the relationship is of great importance

and their goals of little importance

• Wants to be accepted and liked by other

• Thinks conflict should be avoided in favour of harmony and that people

can’t discuss conflicts without damaging relationships

• Afraid that if conflict continues someone will be hurt and that will ruin the

relationship

• Gives up their goals to preserve the relationship

Compromising

• Moderately concerned with their own goals

and their relationship with others

• Seeks a compromise – gives up part of their goals and persuades the

other person in a conflict to give up part of their goals

• Seeks a conflict situation in which both sides gain something – the middle

ground between the two extreme positions

• Willing to sacrifice part of their goals and relationships in order to find

agreement for the common good.

Confronting (collaborating)

• Highly values own goals and relationships

• See conflicts as a problem to be solved

• Seeks a solution that achieves both their own goals and the goals of the

other person

• See conflicts as means of improving relationships by reducing tension

between two people

Confronting

• Tries to begin a discussion that identifies the conflict as a

problem

• Seeks solutions that satisfy both themselves and the other

person – hence maintaining the relationship

• Not satisfied until they have found a solution that achieves

their own goals and the other person’s goals

• Not satisfied until the tensions and negative feeling have

been fully resolved.

Conflict Grid

8 Pillars of Optimal Health

1. Reduce your risk factors for chronic diseaseWeight, blood pressure, blood sugar

2. ExerciseIncidental (eg 10,000 steps )

3. Good macronutritionProtein, carbohydrates, good fats

4. Good micronutritionVitamins, minerals, phytonutrients

5. Mind, spirit and positive attitudeMeditation, religion, whatever!

6. Adequate restTips for a good night’s sleep

7. Good medical careBuild a good team

8. Healthy Environment and good hygiene, adequate waterYeah, right!

Duke Johnson, MD. 2008 The Optimal Health Revolution. Dallas, TX, USA: BenBella Books, Inc

3. How can things go wrong?

Holmes and Rahe stress scale

How much stress is too much?

Stress, Vulnerability, and Resilience

Risk Factors & Protective Factors

Addictions?

Self-medication

Correlation is not cause

Triggering

Substance use

• Usually occurs in a social context

– alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, illicits

• Self-medication is perceived to be effective

– anxiety, tension, and general dysphoria

• Alcohol and cannabis most frequently abused

– political significance eg. “war on drugs”

• Use does not equal abuse

– social, occupational, or physical sequelae

SUBSTANCE ABUSEPSYCHIATRIC CRITERIA

• Failure to fulfil major role obligations related to substance use;

» or

• Recurrent substance use in physically hazardous situations;

» or

• Recurrent substance related legal problems;» or

• Continued substance use despite recurrent and persistent social or interpersonal problems.

SUBSTANCE DEPENDENCEPSYCHIATRIC CRITERIA (1 of 3)

• Three or more of:

– Tolerance

• a need for markedly increased amounts of a substance to achieve intoxication / desired effect; or

• markedly diminished effect with continued use of same amount of substance

– Withdrawal • characteristic withdrawal syndrome for specific substance; or

• substance use to avoid or relieve withdrawal syndrome

SUBSTANCE DEPENDENCE(2 of 3)

– Substance use in larger amounts or over a longer period than was intended

– Persistent desire or unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control substance use

– Inordinate time spent:• obtaining the substance;

• using the substance; or

• recovering from the substance’s effects

– Reduced or ceased participation in important social, occupational or recreational activities

SUBSTANCE DEPENDENCE(3 of 3)

– Continued substance use despite knowledge of having a recurrent or persistent physical or psychological problem

• Physiological dependence (ie. tolerance or withdrawal) may or may not be present

Point #1Substance abuse is very common in people with mental health problems

• Cigarette smoking (80% in schizophrenia)

• Other substance abuse - up to 50% lifetime prevalence with mental disorders

People with mental disorders tend to use substances as

• ‘Self-medication’ to effectively alleviate:

– anxiety / tension

– dysphoric states

– depressive symptoms (eg. apathy, sleep disturbance)

– positive psychotic symptoms- less successful

• Mental disorders increase risk of abuse - “bi-directional” interaction

Point #2The risk of psychological problems is

increased by substance abuse

• Contributory > causal

• Depression and anxiety most common co-occurring problems

• Higher rates of psychosis than general population

– eg. five times the risk of schizophrenia 5%

Substance abuse increases the severity and impact of mental

disorders• Violence / aggression• Depression• Suicide attempts• Illegal behaviours• Medication non-compliance• Reduced medication effectiveness• Medication adverse effects• Earlier age of onset of psychotic symptoms• Persistent relapse• Increased severity of positive symptoms

Dual disorders are commonly associated with

– young, single males

– early cessation of formal education

– disrupted employment history

– homelessness / displacement: ~42%

– “difficult” clients

• Dual diagnosis is associated with reduced response to interventions for substance abuse

The impact of trauma

Medications & other treatments

4. Ideas & Strategies

Angels Among Us

The Choice in helping those in need

Our Way of Being Determines Our Influence

Regardless of external behaviour

2 Core Barriers to Happiness

• Entitlement

– “I deserve my abundance” (you don’t)

• Resentment

– “I deserve your abundance” (you don’t)

Gratitude Overcomes Resentment and Entitlement

by our turning from our own needs, and focussing on the needs of others

4 Principles for Gratitude

1. “I am no better”“It is not the ground we walk on that reveals our humanity, but our manner of walking upon it.”

2. “I supply basic needs”Food. Clothing. Security.

3. “I provide opportunities for growth”Planting & nurturing seeds.

4. “I cherish those in need”Every opportunity to care is a unique privilege.

Goal Setting

Do you really

want a drill?

The drill to make a hole?

Or the hole for a hook to hang a picture?

So you didn’t really want a drill!

Or did you?

Which do you focus on?Pleasing methods, or pleasing results?

“The common denominator of success; the secret of success of every man who has ever been

successful lies in the fact that he formed the habit of doing things

that failures don't like to do.”Albert E.N. Gray

5. Health Motivations Quadrant

Scarcity or Abundance?

Healthy Relationships

Healthy Finances

Physical Health

The Consequences of Choice

Making the shift

1. Look for the symptoms of a scarcity mentality2. Focus on the abundance, not on the lack3. Appreciate4. Get organized5. Change your input6. Share the wealth7. Create win-win situations8. Remind yourself9. Your greatest loss may contain your greatest

opportunity

6. Vehicles & education

3 Fs or 3 Rs?

Most of us get stuck by three misconceptions about change

- our trust in facts, fear, and force (the three Fs)

Three Keys to Change

• Relating– Form a new, emotional relationship with a person or community that

inspires and sustains hope. If you face a situation that a reasonable person would consider "hopeless," you need the influence of seemingly "unreasonable" people to restore your hope--to make you believe that you can change and expect that you will change.

• Repeating– The new relationship helps you learn, practice, and master the new habits

and skills that you'll need. It takes a lot of repetition over time before new patterns of behaviour become automatic and seem natural--until you act the new way without even thinking about it. It helps tremendously to have a good teacher, coach, or mentor to give you guidance, encouragement, and direction along the way.

• Reframing– The new relationship helps you learn new ways of thinking about your

situation and your life. Ultimately, you look at the world in a way that would have been so foreign to you that it wouldn’t have made any sense before you changed.

Three Keys to Change

New hope

New skills

New thinking

What makes a difference?

• Books & CDs – self talk/affirmations, personal growth study

• Seminars – association with people who will stretch you

• Mentoring – people who are where you want to be

7. Where to from here?

Which is the real world?

Invitation to invest

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Questions / Discussion