family: the shadows of addiction. the bio/psycho/social model of well-being: physical impacts ...

FAMILY: THE SHADOWS OF

ADDICTION

The bio/psycho/social model of well-being:

Physical impactsEmotional impactsSocial impactsSpiritual impacts

IMPACTS OF ADDICTION

Weight gain/weight loss

Medical problems such as: DiabetesHypertension

G.I. problemsCirculation problems

PHYSICAL

AngerDepression IsolationLow self-esteem

MENTAL/EMOTIONAL

Change in friendsNo friendsNegative feedback from

close friendsLoss of interestLack of follow throughNot looking forward to

thingsMisdirected goals

SOCIAL

Anger with GOD/Higher Power

SPIRITUAL

WHAT HAPPENS TO THE FAMILY WHEN

THE ADDICTION BECOMES A PART OF

IT?

Unusual stressNormal routines are interrupted by

frightening experiencesWhat is being said doesn’t match up with

family members feelings i.e. the lyrics don’t match the music

Feelings get shut down and stuffedFamily members become “PODS” or pseudo

self

THE FAMILY

RationalizationIntellectualizingOver controllingEnablingWithdrawingSelf medicating

DEFENSE MECHANISMS ARE COMPLICATED

A family’s ability to create balance within the family unit

Three branches of the family system Husband and Wife Mother and Father Children

HOMEOSTASIS

In a more balanced system there is:Open communicationChildren have a voiceThe rules are for the entire family unit, not just the identified addict.

Boundaries between systemsMembers can identify their role in their families.

HOMEOSTASIS

In alcoholic and drug addicted homes there is a huge lack of balance

The shadow of the disease of addiction takes over the family members and transforms them into something else.

Concepts such as truth and faith become chaotic and promises are broken

Instability

No trust

HOMEOSTASIS

Typically family members fall into two categories:

The Pleaser Withdrawn

Yell scream Smile when in pain Withdraw Cajole Horrang Criticize Overly identify Understand Get fed up

Laugh Lie Exaggerate Rationalize Intellectualize Delusions of grandeur

HOMEOSTASIS

Common Behaviors Include:

INVOLVING FAMILY IN THE RECOVERY

PROCESS

Involve Families.Families dealing with addiction often deny family members the opportunity to share either openly

or partially open about what is happening.

Everyday occurrences that seem normal are put on the “back burner” and feel very much like a

burden.

Give them a safe space to talk with purpose.

TALK WITH PURPOSE

The weights hang on the shoulders of family members Must talk about their feelings Have to have outside positive influence Should not self medicate

Family members in a drug addicted atmosphere tend to: Avoid Lack a genuine emotional connection. Misdirected focus on other problems

TALK WITH PURPOSE

Make no mistake…Addiction = trauma

It is: Persuasive Imposing Lacks rapport Impacts physiological

state Weakens mental stability

THE BRAIN

Amygdala The center for the Fight or Flight mechanism is fully

functional at birth. Hippocampus

Are we threatened? Pre-frontal cortex

Necessary/essential Not fully developed until at least 10 or 11 years old

THE BRAIN

QUESTIONS?

Ben Brafmanbbrafman@destinationhope.net