4 tips on setting boundaries

4 Tips on Setting

BoundariesBy: Kassandra Bibas, ACC

http://www.kassandrabibas.com

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

IDENTIFY YOUR TOP 3 NON-NEGOTIABLES

What are the top three priorities of your life and how do you fit them into your daily/weekly schedule?

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

For example, • If your top three priorities are God, family and

health, the 3 non-negotiables you might choose could include:

Morning prayer Eating dinner as a family at least five nights a

week Exercising daily A non-negotiable is something that gets done NO

MATTER what else you have to do during that day

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

But… • Suffer not one exception• A NON-NEGOTIABLE is non-negotiable• If it’s your priority, you have to make it one…

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

SAY NO AND MEAN IT

Learn to say no clearly, concisely and completely. A no that sounds like a yes is not a no.

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

Assert without debating

• When you say no, there’s no need to explain, clarify or debate the reasoning behind your decision

• Make the decision, communicate it and resist the temptation to defend your position

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

Remember…• “Find your voice to ask for what you want.

Everybody has the right to tell you no or yes, but you always have the right to ask.”

• - Don Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

GIVE YOURSELF 24 HOURS TO DECIDE…

No decision made in a hurry works out…

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

Allow people to make requests…

• Not demands…

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

When someone asks for a favor, request 24 hours to

think about it… • It’ll give you time to evaluate, consider & make

the best choice for you…

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

DECIDE WHERE YOUR LIMIT IS

Before you get a request, know where you’re drawing the line…

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

For example, • Do you work on Sundays?• Can a friend ask you to babysit with less than 24

hours notice and you say yes?• Are you willing to drop your plans to help out a

sibling?• Will you work late and miss your child’s recital?• Will you skip the gym in order to help out a

friend?• Will you stay up all night if your spouse needs

help with a last-minute project he/she procrastinated on?

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

Know where you

stand before you have to take a stand…

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l

Learn more about creating AND keeping healthy boundaries: Register for The Healthy Boundaries Master Class

Learn to Create & Keep Healthy Boundaries: http://tinyurl.com/6vkj43l