Ages and Stages of Social Ages and Stages of Social and Emotional Learningand Emotional Learning

By Eunice R. Tanco, M.Ed.By Eunice R. Tanco, M.Ed.

Competency AreasCompetency Areas Self awarenessSelf awareness

Responsible decision-makingResponsible decision-making

Relationship skillsRelationship skills

Social AwarenessSocial Awareness

Self managementSelf management

What Research Tells Policymakers About What Research Tells Policymakers About Strategies to Promote Social and Emotional Strategies to Promote Social and Emotional

School ReadinessSchool Readiness early experiences and relationships set the early experiences and relationships set the

stage for how a child manages feelings and stage for how a child manages feelings and impulses, and relates to others in the future. impulses, and relates to others in the future.

emotional development and academic learning emotional development and academic learning are far more closely intertwined in the early are far more closely intertwined in the early years than has been previously understood. years than has been previously understood.

How Emotions and Early Academic Learning Are LinkedHow Emotions and Early Academic Learning Are Linked Young children who act in anti-social ways participate less in Young children who act in anti-social ways participate less in

classroom activities and are less likely to be accepted by classroom activities and are less likely to be accepted by classmates and teachers. Teachers provide such children with less classmates and teachers. Teachers provide such children with less instruction and less positive feedback. These children like school instruction and less positive feedback. These children like school less, learn less, and attend less.less, learn less, and attend less.

Young children who show signs of anti-social or aggressive Young children who show signs of anti-social or aggressive behavior are more likely to do poorly on academic tasks and to be behavior are more likely to do poorly on academic tasks and to be held back in the early years. In later childhood and adolescence, held back in the early years. In later childhood and adolescence, they are at greater risk of dropping out and engaging in delinquent they are at greater risk of dropping out and engaging in delinquent acts.acts.

Across a range of studies, the emotional, social, and behavioral Across a range of studies, the emotional, social, and behavioral competence of young children (such as higher levels of self-control competence of young children (such as higher levels of self-control and lower levels of acting out) predict their academic performance and lower levels of acting out) predict their academic performance during school age, over and above their cognitive skills and family during school age, over and above their cognitive skills and family backgrounds.backgrounds.

Efforts to get young children who are at risk of early school failure Efforts to get young children who are at risk of early school failure on a positive school trajectory before negative attitudes and on a positive school trajectory before negative attitudes and behaviors escalate is likely to pay off both in the short and long behaviors escalate is likely to pay off both in the short and long term.term.

Characteristics and What Characteristics and What We Can DoWe Can Do

FOUR YEAR-OLDSFOUR YEAR-OLDS takes turns and shares (most of the time); may takes turns and shares (most of the time); may

still be rather bossy still be rather bossy seeks out adult approval seeks out adult approval understands and obeys simple rules (most of the understands and obeys simple rules (most of the

time) time) likes to talk and carries on elaborate likes to talk and carries on elaborate

conversations conversations capable of feeling jealous capable of feeling jealous persistently asks why persistently asks why fearful of the darkfearful of the dark begins to understand danger - at times can begins to understand danger - at times can

become quite fearful become quite fearful has difficulty separating make-believe from has difficulty separating make-believe from

reality reality lies sometimes to protect self and friends, but lies sometimes to protect self and friends, but

doesn't truly understand the concept of lying - doesn't truly understand the concept of lying - imagination often gets in the way imagination often gets in the way

expresses anger verbally rather than physically expresses anger verbally rather than physically (most of the time) (most of the time)

loves to tell jokes that may not make any sense loves to tell jokes that may not make any sense at all to adults at all to adults

can feel intense anger and frustration can feel intense anger and frustration enjoys dramatic play and role playingenjoys dramatic play and role playing

What teachers can do:What teachers can do: Four-year-olds have a strong need to feel Four-year-olds have a strong need to feel

important and worthwhile. Praise important and worthwhile. Praise accomplishments, and provide opportunities to accomplishments, and provide opportunities to experience freedom and independence.experience freedom and independence.

Promote respect for life and living things by Promote respect for life and living things by letting them help the adults.letting them help the adults.

Be specific when emotions occur and encourage Be specific when emotions occur and encourage discussion among them.discussion among them.

Encourage multicultural awareness through Encourage multicultural awareness through representative dolls, puppets, pictures, and representative dolls, puppets, pictures, and books. Encourage cultural aspects of all the books. Encourage cultural aspects of all the families, and learn recipes, songs, and families, and learn recipes, songs, and information about cultural celebrations.information about cultural celebrations.

FIVE YEAR-OLDSFIVE YEAR-OLDS invents games with simple rules invents games with simple rules still confuses fantasy with reality sometimes still confuses fantasy with reality sometimes can take turns and share, but doesn't always want to can take turns and share, but doesn't always want to expresses anger and jealousy physically expresses anger and jealousy physically is not emotionally ready for competition is not emotionally ready for competition carries on conversations with other children and adults carries on conversations with other children and adults often excludes other children in play - best friends only often excludes other children in play - best friends only likes to make own decisions likes to make own decisions notices when another child is angry or sad - more sensitive to notices when another child is angry or sad - more sensitive to

feelings of others feelings of others prefers company of 1 or 2 children at a time; may become bossy or prefers company of 1 or 2 children at a time; may become bossy or

sulky when others join in sulky when others join in begins to have a very basic understanding of right and wrong begins to have a very basic understanding of right and wrong takes turns and shares (sometimes) takes turns and shares (sometimes) understands and respects rules - often asks permission understands and respects rules - often asks permission understands and enjoys both giving and receiving understands and enjoys both giving and receiving sometimes needs to get away and be alonesometimes needs to get away and be alone

What teachers can do:What teachers can do: Help children learn to make rules and play simple games by Help children learn to make rules and play simple games by

providing opportunities for them to play in small groups.providing opportunities for them to play in small groups. Help children understand and cope with strong feelings by giving Help children understand and cope with strong feelings by giving

them words to use when they are angry. "I can see you are sad about them words to use when they are angry. "I can see you are sad about going home, angry at your friend ...."going home, angry at your friend ...."

Observe how a child plays with other children. Teach him to Observe how a child plays with other children. Teach him to request, bargain, negotiate, and apologize.request, bargain, negotiate, and apologize.

Take questions seriously. Talk to children about what happens and Take questions seriously. Talk to children about what happens and why. Give answers they can understand.why. Give answers they can understand.

Specific praise helps children understand the true value of their Specific praise helps children understand the true value of their actions. actions.

Provide a comfortable place to be alone. Provide a comfortable place to be alone. Take fears seriously. Reassure children that you will make sure that Take fears seriously. Reassure children that you will make sure that

nothing bad will happen to them.nothing bad will happen to them. Encourage interest in jokes, nonsense, and riddles by reading Encourage interest in jokes, nonsense, and riddles by reading

humorous stories, riddles, and nonsense rhymes. Join them in jokes humorous stories, riddles, and nonsense rhymes. Join them in jokes from school, books, and TV.from school, books, and TV.

Give opportunities to express dramatic and creative interest. Give opportunities to express dramatic and creative interest.

SIX THROUGH EIGHT YEAR-OLDSSIX THROUGH EIGHT YEAR-OLDS being with friends becomes increasingly important being with friends becomes increasingly important interested in rules and rituals interested in rules and rituals girls want to play more with girls; boys with boys girls want to play more with girls; boys with boys may have a best friend and an enemy may have a best friend and an enemy strong desire to perform well, do things right strong desire to perform well, do things right begins to see things from another child's point of view, begins to see things from another child's point of view,

but still very self-centered but still very self-centered finds criticism or failure difficult to handle finds criticism or failure difficult to handle views things as black and white, right or wrong, views things as black and white, right or wrong,

wonderful or terrible, with very little middle ground wonderful or terrible, with very little middle ground seeks a sense of security in groups, organized play, and seeks a sense of security in groups, organized play, and

clubs clubs may become upset when behavior or school-work is may become upset when behavior or school-work is

ignored ignored

What teachers can do:What teachers can do: Provide opportunities to develop an understanding of rules by playing simple Provide opportunities to develop an understanding of rules by playing simple

table games: cards, dominoes, tic-tac-toe, etc.table games: cards, dominoes, tic-tac-toe, etc.

Provide opportunities for children to do non-competitive team activities such Provide opportunities for children to do non-competitive team activities such as working a jigsaw puzzle or planting a garden.as working a jigsaw puzzle or planting a garden.

Encourage children's sense of accomplishment by providing opportunities to Encourage children's sense of accomplishment by providing opportunities to build models, cook, make crafts, practice music, or work with wood.build models, cook, make crafts, practice music, or work with wood.

·Encourage children's collections by allowing them to make special boxes or ·Encourage children's collections by allowing them to make special boxes or books in which to store their collections.books in which to store their collections.

·Encourage reading and writing by allowing children to produce stories with ·Encourage reading and writing by allowing children to produce stories with scripts, create music for plays and puppet shows, produce a newspaper, record scripts, create music for plays and puppet shows, produce a newspaper, record events, go on field trips, or conduct experiments.events, go on field trips, or conduct experiments.

·Help children explore their world by taking field trips to museums, work ·Help children explore their world by taking field trips to museums, work places, and other neighborhoods. Invite community helpers to your home.places, and other neighborhoods. Invite community helpers to your home.

NINE THROUGH ELEVEN YEAR-OLDSNINE THROUGH ELEVEN YEAR-OLDS

Children of this age develop a sense of self and find it important Children of this age develop a sense of self and find it important to gain social acceptance and experience achievement. to gain social acceptance and experience achievement.

Friends become increasingly important. Secret codes, shared Friends become increasingly important. Secret codes, shared word meanings and made up languages, passwords and word meanings and made up languages, passwords and elaborate rituals are important ways to strengthen the bonds of elaborate rituals are important ways to strengthen the bonds of friendship. friendship.

Close friends are almost always of the same sex, although Close friends are almost always of the same sex, although children in this age group are usually increasingly interested in children in this age group are usually increasingly interested in peers of the opposite sex. peers of the opposite sex.

rituals, rules, secret codes, and made-up languages are common rituals, rules, secret codes, and made-up languages are common enjoys being a member of a club enjoys being a member of a club increased interest in competitive sports increased interest in competitive sports outbursts of anger are less frequent outbursts of anger are less frequent may belittle or defy adult authoritymay belittle or defy adult authority

What teachers can do:What teachers can do:

Be prepared to use all your "patience" skills if caring for children this age, as Be prepared to use all your "patience" skills if caring for children this age, as they tend to think that they do not need any adult care or supervision. Yet, they tend to think that they do not need any adult care or supervision. Yet, when they are left to care for themselves, they are lonely, unhappy, and when they are left to care for themselves, they are lonely, unhappy, and sometimes frightened begins to see parents and authority figures as fallible sometimes frightened begins to see parents and authority figures as fallible human beingshuman beings

Provide opportunities for older school-agers to help out with real skills. Provide opportunities for older school-agers to help out with real skills. Provide time and space for an older child to be alone. Time to read, daydream, Provide time and space for an older child to be alone. Time to read, daydream, or do school work uninterrupted will be appreciated.or do school work uninterrupted will be appreciated.

Encourage children to participate in an organized club or youth group. Many Encourage children to participate in an organized club or youth group. Many groups encourage skill development with projects or activities.groups encourage skill development with projects or activities.

Encourage older children to help but avoid burdening with too many adult Encourage older children to help but avoid burdening with too many adult responsibilities. Allow time for play and relaxation.responsibilities. Allow time for play and relaxation.

Provide opportunities for older children to play games of strategy. Checkers, Provide opportunities for older children to play games of strategy. Checkers, chess, and monopoly are favorites.chess, and monopoly are favorites.

Remember to provide plenty of food. Older children have larger appetites than Remember to provide plenty of food. Older children have larger appetites than younger children and will need to eat more. younger children and will need to eat more.

Resource: Resource:

Lesia Oesterreich, M.S.Lesia Oesterreich, M.S.Family Life Extension SpecialistFamily Life Extension SpecialistHuman Development and Family StudiesHuman Development and Family StudiesIowa State UniversityIowa State University

National Network for Child Care (NNCC)National Network for Child Care (NNCC)

National Center for Children In PovertyNational Center for Children In Poverty

Columbia UniversityColumbia University