A night and a day in Vientiane From eating buns to shooting guns Text and pictures by Jonathan Ramael

Vientiane, Laos is often described as

somewhat of a dusty, peaceful little city,

completely incomparable with the raging

metropolises other Asian capitals tend to

be: a nice and quiet place to spend some

time, as long as you don’t want the day to

be all too exciting. It’s an easy image to

agree with once you’re there. There are

some busy parts of course – don’t expect a

city with 750,000 inhabitants to feel like a

rural village – but most of it is quite relaxed: children playing on the street, people enjoying a

beer in the shade of their terraces; even the tuktuk drivers aren’t trying to attract potential

clients all too aggressively. But is this all there is to it? I refused to believe that. Every city has

its secrets: interesting places where the locals go. No lonely planet or tourist map will point

them out for you. All you need is enough time to discover them. Time though, is always a

precious resource when travelling for work. That’s why I decided to get some inside help.

Introducing MICE-People

MICE-People (www.mice-people.com) is a

DMC based in Laos, run by a young team of

dedicated Laotians and long established

expat travel professionals. They’re the first of

a kind in the country, and they do everything

in their power to show the world Laos is a

prized, standalone incentive destination or a

fantastic highlight during a bigger trip

through Southeast Asia. When I started

mailing with Mr. Laurent Granier, GM and

co-founder of MICE-People, my request was a simple one: ‘I have one free evening and one

free day in Vientiane. I would like to see as much of the real city as humanly possible. I want

to find out about off-the-track little venues, eateries and activities that really capture the

local spirit, but are also useful to someone looking for an incentive activity’. A couple of days

later, I found myself holding onto the back of a little scooter, after Laurent and his two

colleagues Jean-Yves and Vithaya picked me up at the hotel for a nightly city drive. It would

turn out to be an evening of interest.

The MICE-People team

A secret war that never ends

Our first stop was more shocking than fun, but

it’s the most essential one to make for a better

understanding of the country. Laos has a history

often drenched in pain. One of its most recent

dark moments was the Vietnam War. Although

officially neutral in the conflict, Laos was the

battleground of a terrible secret war between

the USA and the Vietcong. The now legendary

Ho Chi Minh trail through the Laotian jungle

was the key logistical artery for the North Vietnamese army. As a result, Laos is still known

today as the most heavily bombed country in the world. More than half a million American

explosives (including cluster- and phosphorous bombs) were dropped here: an estimate of

one ton of explosives for every Laotian man, woman and child alive at the time.

A lot of these bombs didn’t explode on impact and are still making casualties today. Dozens

of people are killed or maimed by them every year. This is where COPE comes in: a non-

profit organisation founded to help the victims of these hidden killers. COPE funds training

for physiotherapists, attracts international donors and covers the cost of prosthetics and

rehabilitation. The COPE visitor centre tells the story of these horrible events honestly and

openly. You’ll see improvised prosthetic legs made by villagers, and even household objects

made by scrap metal from bombs. It’s a harsh testament of the horror of war and it shows

us, once again, that it’s always the innocent bearing the brunt of the suffering. COPE also

offers hope though, embodied for example by the joy of the wheelchair basketball team

playing in the hall next door. The COPE centre is an important visit in Vientiane, especially

for medically oriented groups. More info on: www.copelaos.org.

Kickboxing in the slums

The rest of the evening would – luckily – prove to be more

joyful. As we rode our scooters out of the centre, the roads

became increasingly shabby. After a while, asphalt made room

for dirt and dust. We were now officially in the back alleys, far

from any hotel or hostel. It was in one of these shady little dust

roads we found the strangest venue. Unexpected, genuine and

truly Laotian: The Sikhai Muay Lao Kickboxing School. It

reminded me somewhat of the training hangar in the first Rocky

movie: punching bags hanging all over the place and a big boxing

ring in the middle. All around us were youngsters, as well as tiny

neighbourhood girls and boys who could probably floor me in an

instant. They might not be training in the prettiest of dojos, but

their mentor wasn’t an amateur. Before spending his days teaching his passion to the local

kids, Kampanath participated in the 1980 Olympics. Sikhai is available for demonstrations or

training sessions – you can even participate. It can also be used for drinks, receptions and

betting on fights if you have an adventurous group looking for some genuine local flavour.

A local night with local food

The rest of the evening consisted of riding our little scooters from one authentic eating

venue to the next. Our first culinary stop was a true local institution. Everyone living in

Vientiane knows exactly where it is, and the only time it isn’t packed is when it’s closed. The

name of this crazily popular eatery? KFC! Khouvieng Fried Chicken that is, named after the

street it’s in. The chairs are made from plastic, the portions are generous and you can order

the national dish to go with it: tam maak hoong, a spicy green papaya salad. Satisfied and

with greasy fingers, we continued our adventure through the magic that is the nightly Lao

kitchen.

After a stop at Khao Ji for a French baguette with

pork pâté and spring onions, we took to the main

treat of the evening: the That Luang night food

stalls. Since there are next to no supermarkets in

Vientiane, locals tend to head to these night

markets after work to do their daily shopping. This

one in particular is a gem, with carnival stands,

games and a playground for the kids: completely

off the tourist track but very popular amongst

Laotians. We were probably the only Westerners there. The variety of food and drinks is

abundant and the options go from ‘tasty’ to ‘holy mother of God, who in his right mind

would ever eat this!?’ I enjoyed some of it. Nam van was nice, a sweet drink made from

coconut milk mixed with variable ingredients. The minced pork rolled in lettuce leaves was

good too, and even the

pork skin was tasty

once you forgot what it

was. One thing I could

not face to eat though,

was the infamous

steamed egg with a

chicken embryo still

inside. Vithaya tried one in my name and concluded – quite

logically – it tasted like ‘yummy yummy eggs and chicken’.

Although his wording was tempting, I opted for a cold beerlao

instead.

Various types of nam van

Vithaya and the embryo egg

If you can look past all the baby-eating, visiting the night market is a very pleasant

experience. MICE People organises tastings or group challenges here. Actually all of the

eateries can be combined in a GPS or ‘QR Code’ Smartphone-based treasure hunt. Less

adventurous groups can of course enjoy an alternative experience in a closed venue of

choice. The dishes would be the same, but prepared by the staff of a professional restaurant.

But still, who’d go for a boring replica if you can dig your carnivorous teeth in the real deal?

Cock-a-doodle-doo little chicks!

Exotic treats all well and good, but at the end of the day all you really want is some ice

cream. And guess what I was having next? A Pei is a little family run place almost impossible

to find by yourself. They specialise in homemade ice cream, served on sweet sticky rice.

Mine was made from flowers. It was extraordinarily delicious. Before going for our last drink,

we ended our eating frenzy at some food stalls on Hengboon Street, buying more

smoothies, juices and Laotian cakes. I ended the night with a full tummy and a better

understanding of Vientiane, but more was yet to come the next morning.

Croissants and Crickets

Our second day would lead us out of the city again,

so we were glad to take a Range Rover instead of a

scooter. Not before eating some French croissants

in Le Banneton though. One of the biggest cultural

influences the French left behind in Laos is a taste

for good bread and coffee. Vientiane is littered with

bakeries and coffeehouses, and Le Banneton is

probably the best one.

Next, we visited the huge Dok Mak Kai market, some 20 minutes out of the city. This is

another one of the improvised supermarkets for locals. You can buy almost everything here:

from household products to pieces of furniture to a massive variety of food and drinks. Most

attractive to me of course, were the weirdest types of food: from frogs to crabs to all sorts of

larva, maggots and insects. Since crickets look nothing like baby chicks, and also slightly

because I’m a very brave man, I decided to try one. They are actually not bad at all. They

taste a little nutty, like the peanuts you eat in a bar. As long as you can restrain yourself from

looking down while you eat, you should be alright. I did look. I decided not to have a second

one. My friends on the other hand, bought an entire bag of the little buggers. It’s never

wrong to have a snack on hand for later.

A snack that would come in handy, since our next stop were the

drifting restaurant boats on the Nam Ngum river, a tributary of

the Mekong. This is the place to go for a relaxing meal in the

broadest sense. You order the food on the shore, where they

cook it for you (because what would be the point of ordering,

right?). Then you get on a boat, take off your shoes and get

seated on the pillows around a low table, where you eat the

food while you’re carried upstream. You’ll pass a lot of nature

and several little fishing villages before the boatman turns the

engine off and lets you drift back to where you started. There

was no time for a full dinner though, so while I emptied my

bottle of beer, the rest of the gang happily ate the bag of bugs

until there were none left. Cheers!

Saying goodbye with a blast

Floating on our boat, the afternoon flew by. We

only had time for one last stop, and for once it

didn’t have anything to do with food. The Vientiane

National Shooting Range is the perfect place for

what every grown man secretly still likes to do:

playing GI Joe. There is a fine paintball terrain here,

but you can also shoot real guns (no, not at each

other) from small handheld weapons to an actual

AK-47 machine gun. Now, I am certainly not a gun

nut, and I’ve never shot a real one in my life. When

I see some redneck farmer yell about his right to

bear arms on television, I feel ashamed on his

behalf. But I must admit: standing there with a gun in your hand, taking aim and feeling the

recoil as you fire is quite exciting and addictive, especially if you’re actually hitting the target.

A surprise ending of what had been a surprising day. But, since I still had a MICE Fair to

attend, it was sadly time to say goodbye.

MICE People organises activities all over Laos and its neighbouring countries. They are not

limited to Vientiane. According to them, the capital is too often underrated and even

skipped by incentive groups. Nonetheless, it has a lot to offer, and can easily fit into a bigger

trip through Luang Prabang or Northern Thailand. For more info, check www.mice-

people.com or contact Laurent@mice-people.com.

Interesting, but not mentioned in the text

The National Dojo “Budo Centre”: The perfect venue for martial arts lovers, built in 2009 to

host the Japanese martial arts performed during the SEA Games held in Vientiane. It can be

privatized and turned into a big event venue. Top athletes can give demonstrations while

your guests eat.

Makpeth: one of the busiest places in town for Lao food with a twist. It is seen as one of the

best restaurants in Vientiane. Because it’s an NGO-run property, you’re also helping street

kids get a qualification and professional experience in cooking, service and management.

Aria: A great Italian restaurant (with an Italian chef) in Rue François Ngin, in the very centre

of town. They have a prime collection of good Italian wine and Pietmonte white truffle is

often on the menu.

Jazzy Brick: A great, loungy place for cocktails and mocktails, right in the centre of town near

Nam Phou.

Saylom Yen Sinh Dat: A wonderful outdoor restaurant where you grill your own ingredients

on the metallic dome of a clay pot placed in the middle of your table. The Lao version of the

Japanese Shabu-Shabu BBQ.