a day to forget the earth

7/27/2019 A Day to Forget the Earth

1/22

A DayTo Forget

The Earth

E.L. Ford


2/22

'Buyers Remorse' by Myandra Wolfthorn

Silly busted down

old ugly stupid thing

sitting there all junked upin my drivewayyour dirty white paint

is peeling and you need some gas

But why dont you fucking work?

Why cant you just run longerthan two weeks?

Im starting to hate you

overheating

and under cooling

five dollars used to be enoughto satisfy your hunger

I just got you from the lot

not that long agoand there you are

sputtering and swerving

like some foreign machine

I wish I could drop youbut Im stuck here without you

God

how I hate your being thereall empty and not goingyou make me sick

I hope that after I use you full

that I see them crush you

between two moving metal blocks


3/22

1

My eyes opened the second the bedroom door unlatched. A loud crack like a firework

followed by subsequent snaps of veneer paneling, Suzy Lee, Feo finally called yah. Pax isrubbing his sleepy eyes.

When he passed out on his sofa last night, I took advantage of the queen sized mattress in his

bedroom. I regret nothing.

I roll over. My brain is spinning and alert, but my body remains slow with stiff joints, Did ya

take a message? Shit, I need to call him back.

No. Now. Hes on the phone.

I rise from the bed. I dont have time to stretch. Ive been waiting on this call for three days

and thats three days leaning on Paxs generous hospitality.

They call him Feodore the Fairy. Not because hes gay, but because hes got a wife and threegirlfriends all stashed around town. I know what youre thinking; well, thats not politically

correct, but thats how he was introduced to me, its what he prefers, and Im not one to

argue with a crack dealer.

I know Paxs home phone is on the computer stand in the living room, but the whiskey still

coursing through my veins is telling me it is further. It feels like it takes forever to walk thereand pick it up, Hello?

Hey there, Suzy-baby, how ya doin? His thick, low voice comes through spaces of static. I

hate cell phones.

Im doing fine. I was wonderin if I could get that money you owe me. They cut my food

card off and I need to get some groceries.

Yeah, yeah, I know its hard on everybody these days. Theyve been sayin its a recession onthe TV box.

More like a depression. I grumble.

Yeah, I hear ya there. Whatever, Feo. Anything less than fifty is chump change as far as

youre concerned, About the money, I got to take my kid to his soccer game, so I wont beable to run it out to ya, but Judys at the house.

Okay

So, Theres shuffling on his end of the line, Judyll be there and the moneys there to be

picked up. Is that cool?

Yeah, itll be nice to visit Judy for a few.


4/22

Kay, good. Ive got to go. Be careful, take care.

You too, brother.

He hangs up in a hurry. Hes always in a hurry. Its either the drugs or the business. Probably

both, but it is a nice feeling to have a street pharmacist temporarily in my pocket even if it is

by chance.

See, my momma had given me a hundred dollars when she got her first of the month check. It

was meant to assist in my late rent, but I went on the riverboat to gamble with my buddies.Dutchie had brought Feo the Fairy along and before midnight, the dealer was five hundred

under and I loaned him the cab fare home.

Whatd he say? Poor Pax. My telephone was shut off two weeks ago and Ive been having

all my calls directed to his place. He says he doesnt mind, but I think hes just being kind. Its

no secret among our group that hes wanted me to be his girl for a while now. We sleeptogether, we have good times together, but a wild flower can not grow in a cage. Not yet,

anyway.

I have to go all the way out there to get it. Lord, thats a twenty mile trip, ten there and tenback, Shit. I flop down on the pile of blankets on the sofa and begin putting on my knock

off Chuck Taylors.

Yah cant walk all the way out there, itll take you all day. Let me get ready and Ill takeyah.

I can only give ya five in gas.

Thats fine. He goes back to his bedroom and talks as he changes his clothes, We can take

the back way through the forest and up Open Sky Road.

Right on. I say, Im gonna use the bathroom fore we go. Ill meet ya outside.The couple who lived here before my friend were horrid decorators. The bathroom is a

wretched shade of pink with strips of the wallpaper peeking through from the wear and tearof neglectful tenants. Did I mention the bright tangerine trim? Yes, it really adds to the

anxiety riddled, claustrophobic vibe it induces. The six vanity lights hurt my eyes. The room

is far too small for such brilliance and they help ease on a panic attack for anybody who

enters. This room is a vulgar uterus on display.

I look into the mirror as I wash my hands. The party last night sure took a toll on my eighteenyear old complexion. The hip eyeliner from eight hours ago has caked and given me raccoon

eyes. I wash it away, fluff up my curly black hair, and dab some scarlet lipstick to my cheeksfor a healthier glow. Makeshift blush at its best.

Feeling satisfied with my appearance (you can only do so much with a hungover face) I meet

Pax on the tiny stoop of his apartment. It is a door of many in a row in a tall boring buildingwe call The Bounds as its address is 66 Boundary Street. He lives in number 2. Known for

being a notorious complex, his is well situated with a row of white dogwood trees blocking

the view of the other apartments which means theyre less likely to steal the kids toys in the

front yard.


5/22

Pax is one of those part-time dads. His little boy, Conner, is a real sweetheart, but no one seeshim that much because Pax is always doing something with him. Hell save up every cent he

earns and then blow it on the weekend to insure Conner has a good time. It doesnt hurt that

Pax and his ex-girlfriend, Holli Wolfe, have a good friendship. For having a kid from a one

night stand, they handled themselves like adults and theyre both damn good parents.

Im walking to his rusted jalopy we call The Beast while he locks the door. I smell like boozeand cigarettes with a hint of THC. Oddly enough, that is the exact same smell of this whole

county. Like a high school dropout dumping ground. It is a depression were suffering from

and its called The Rich White Mans Greed, but there is no need to start agonizing from

Weltschmerz so early in the day.

The Beast has been a derelict car since Pax bought it for three hundred dollars when he was

sixteen. He bought it, quit school, and started a band with a couple of friends who are now

lost to history.

He lives from the generosity of his soft-hearted mother and welding jobs. Whatever hes

doing, its better than what Im doing.

Maybe I should have him work on my budget? I smile to myself after that thought. I live dayby day. I dont think I could scrounge enough money to create a budget.

The times are hard. They say. But people are always saying that, arent they?

Does anyone care that were all starving and dying down here in Appalachia or are the past

two-three hundred years our hard times we must bare?

My dear Port Alexandria used to be a swinging city resting on the confluence of the Ohio and

Scioto rivers. There were jobs and shops. The riverboats werent just for gambling and themining and automobile industries were up and running. There were people and children and

the festivals and fairs were bigger and more exciting.

Now, its a wasteful hole where indifference and apathy are as high as the hilltops. Crooked

cops, bribed officials, journalists on the take. There is no such thing as community anymorebecause everyone wants their piece of pie. No one cares about all us underthings that

languish. Ive heard its because were still looked upon as ignorant, inbred, drunk hillbillies.

Personally, Im a little of all thoseexcept inbred, of course. At leastas far as I know

2

I hope we can make it to the gas station. Paxs rainbow flecked eyes shift nervously from

the gas gauge to the road ahead of us.

I feel pretty bad about only giving him a few bucks, but do I apologize for having bad luck ordo I apologize for life being unfair? Yes, it is my fault for not being a hardworking employee

of some out of school desk job with mediocre benefits in case I die of old age or boredom.

And yes, it is my fault for knowing the value of the twenty-five Feo owes me because I


6/22

understand the value of a dollar. I understand a penny can make the difference and I know itfrom poor life choices, but its not my fault that it isnt enough to deliver according to Feos

high stakes lifestyle.

I dont know what point Im saying it for, but I light a cigarette, Sorry I dont have more to

give ya, but Ill give ya another five when we get to Feos house.

Well need it. He smiles at me with reassuring dimples.

I pick up the gold pocket watch he leaves in the car. The Confederate flag is impressed on thefront. The curves and precision it took to do this by hand is breathtaking. It opens to an

engraving;

For my son, Stonewall 1942

Stonewall Howell is Paxs father, named after the famed Civil War general. Paxs pop is a

great man indeed. I was in kindergarten when I first met him. Stonewall used to be a Baptist

preacher then he became a Navy Seal, but he was well retired by the time I made myappearance. He is one cool customer. He tells these stories of honky tonk brawls, life in the

military, and he explains the Bible is such miraculous ways that he temporarily raises myfaith.

The masterfully crafted timepiece reads close to eleven-thirty. Im guessing that by noon itll

be ninety degrees. I dont want to stay out in this swamp heat. Luckily, this is about a fortyminute trip, so we should be back in comfort before twelve-thirty.

I wish The Beast had air-conditioning.

The old King Co. station is packed. Its May 3rd and everyone on disability has received their

checks. Plus, its the first hot day after that cold front went through. That means the

fishermen, boatmen, and the hog and crow hunters are all out and about with their red and

blue coolers full of red and blue canned beer. Man, traffic is going to suck today.

There is a wait all the way to the highway line of nine cars for full service, but there is onlyone at the self-service. That is a testament of our laziness as a people, I think. Theyd rather

leave their cars on and wait fifteen minutes than pay the attendant and pump their own gas.

What a bunch of monkeys.

The guy in front of us is sharply dressed for a summers day. He looks to be smack dab in themiddle of middle age and his tall height adds to his vague youth. On the other hand, his car

does not correspond with him. While his tennis shoes are white, the tires are patched and half

flat. And while his khakis are pleated and his Alice blue polo is made of something soft and

fine, the car is covered in a dry, bubbling coat. The navy paint flakes off some here in theparking lot. Rust has taken over the bumper and is creeping along towards devouring the

rest.

Hes just filled his tank, but hes got two ten gallon drums on the cement slab to be filled.

Pax squeezes the wheel, I cant believe this. I cant believe were stuck behind the slowest

fuck on the lot. Its either wait in a line for half an hour or wait one hour behind this fake ass

foppish fuck.


7/22

I shrug, What do I do with my cigarette butt? Its burning there between my fingers andThe Beast has never had an ashtray nor will he ever remember to replace it.

Toss it out the window.

What? I cant do that. Were at a gas station. You cant even smoke in a gas station parking

lot.

Nonsense. The pumps are aaalll the way over there and were aaalll the way over here. Toss

it out the window.

My eyes weigh the options. If I were a dick, Id put it out in his freshly opened can of soda.

Then again, I could just burn my hand all easy as pie and hard ass like. I flick it out the

window and just for a second I think, I hope we dont blow up.

The man in front of us rubs sweat from his balding head as he finishes the second drum. Pax

lets out an irritated sigh while we watch him pay the underage attendant. He walks calmly tohis car and gets in. He sits. We wait. A minute goes by and his back lights flare on then go off.

He sits. We wait. The third car in the full service lane is now first. He sits and we wait.

Oh, come on already! Pax snarls as he pushes down on the horn, This kind of shit should

be illegal!

Maybe hes God and were being taught a lesson in patience. His car is evidence of his

humility and piety.

Or maybe hes just another asshole. He says.

The man pulls out and Pax goes forward, If I were God come to earth to teach patience to a

couple of stoners, Id have better hair than that guy.

3

The quickest way to Marcusville is past West Port Alexandria, through a section of Cherokee

Forest, then on to Open Sky Road which is the scenic backroad of West Port. It sounds like a

lot, but it shaves off five miles of the journey if youre driving.

The radio is on WSMP and theyre doing some half hour of a Phil Lynott tribute. Its good,but it isnt distracting me from the weather. Its getting warmer and the air tastes like newly

dug earth and heat.West Ports a first-class place to live in if youre into white supremacy. I was born and raised

in this ghetto sludge of mountain clan mentality down on Poe Creek Road by Washington

Run.

It was uncomfortable to live and attend school here. Words like nigger and jiggaboo andsambo are said often and Ive just never warmed to that kind of thinking.

My parents faked racism to fit in. I remember the picture of Martin Luther King Jr. on my


8/22

fathers nightstand. There were biographies on every bookshelf. My dad would even quotehim before giving us kids advice or a scolding. There was a great admiration and still he

would chuckle, and move in his seat uneasily, at a racist joke.

When I was fifteen, a couple moved in at the beginning of the holler. The husband was

African and his wife was Mexican. They had three beautiful daughters. I would see them play

in the creek when I went by in the school bus. They all kept to themselves and never botheredanyone.

One day everything was fine. The next day they were gone and the remnants of a burning

cross still glowed in their front yard. I never saw those girls play ever again.

What a sickening place. Arent we all just people?

Im thankful when the houses become fewer and farther between. There is one big hill we go

up before we see a sign;

CHEROKEE FOREST

NOWENTERING

The words are large with good scale projection and carved well in a big plank of wood. Theletters are painted hunter green and its all so fucking lovely, Pax, you think if trees could

talk there would be one cryin over that sign, like oh, nothey got Eddie?

There is a piece of the forest road which lays in a perpetual Autumn. In the summer, the

leaves are brown and brittle like theyre about to fall, but they never do. In the winter, the

pleasant shades clash with the blustery, barren days.

Five minutes on a gravel path and we come to a three way country bumpkin cluster fuck of a

road. Bales of hay line the fence dividing the farm from the pavement where two stunningauburn mares feast away. Pax turns onto Open Sky Road. It used to be called Aryan Holler,

but it was changed when the last of a local clan family member died back in sixty-eight.

The homes out here are made of logs. There are the cabins, the big farm houses, and theoccasional tipi style A-frames, but they are all made from good ole fashioned wood.

The most beautiful homes are the giant mansions built for wealthy land owners. They are

now all crumbling and falling over from weathered, festering ages of disuse, but if you look

with the right eyes you can see the grandiloquence of their active years. The magnificent rose

bushes that once lined the houses, the purebred horses, pastel colored dresses moving and

dancing holding Mint Juleps and moonshine for their men.

Im jealous that I cant have one of these houses to fix up. All this empty land and abandoned

homes and all these homeless people with nowhere to go. Theres just something not right

with this.


9/22

4

Feodore Carmichael used to live in town back in the day, but he thought the police were tooclose for comfort. Hes got the perfect setup now. He and his family live in a three bedroom

trailer, plain, without a stitch of real care and the crackhouse is at a secondary location and I

think only Feo knows where thats at. They live humbly which is smart. Id imagine in that

line of business youd want to be as low as possible. They eat well and they dress nicely, but

not too nice. His kids have their college educations paid for and he and Judy have a decent

retirement. Life will be good for them someday.

I hope I dont end up in a gutter when Im old. Ive seen it happen to those who live too

freely. They fly so high that all they can do is fall.

Pax turns down their driveway and parks by Judys red van. Its in so-so condition with a

butterfly sticker on the bumper, Ill be right back.

They dont use their front door so I travel around back. Jesus, its hot! I wore a paisley button

up shirt last night and now Im suffocating in it.

The backdoor is wide open, Judy?

Suzy Lee? Come on in. She calls.

I walk in. Its dim, but I can see she has her back to me washing the dishes. She dries her

hands on a towel and turns to hug me. She welcomes me with a smile on her lips and in hereyes. Judy is a pretty social person, but my grumbling belly must keep focus and not get

caught in her flux.She looks darling in an orange tye-dye shirt and denim peddle pushers, How have ya been,

girrrl?

Oh, you know me. I just keep on keepin on. My eyes adjust to the darkness of the roomand I see their daughter, Terrie, eating a bowl of cereal on the sofa surrounded by a pack of

dogs. They all sit calmly and and stare at me. Their collective eyes dont shake from me. I

gotta get outta here.

Her russet eyes grin with the beginning of crows feet, Youre money is on the table under

the basket. She points behind me then turns away to stir something on her stove. I pick up a

ragged twenty and a crisp five and she asks, Would you like somethin to drink?

Nah, I gotta get goin. Someones waitin on me.

She circles around strongly and the dogs are fast on the draw. Their nails on hardwood floor

makes a sound only reminiscent to Nazi boots clicking at attention, You brought someone

here?

Terrie is peeking over the counter. Ive never seen such coal black eyes. My heart is in my

throat, N-uh, yeah, I dont drive.


10/22

Her posture eases and the dogs relax. She crinkles her thick, ski slope nose with funnyamusement, Really?

Never learned how. If I ran for it, there would be no way to jump down those stairs and

run over the uneven cobblestone walkway. With all the windows down in The Beast, theyd

just leap in and tear us to shreds right there in the driveway.

Well, youll learn soon enough. My sister didnt start driving til she was twenty-five.

Right on. Well, uh, Ill be seein you round.

Wait. She says. Shes digging in a neon flower printed purse on the table. She hands out afive dollar bill, For your driver.

Thanks. I smile, See you later, Judy. Bye, Terrie. The girl waves, Judy hugs me again, and

I ship out of there like a thankful dandy.

I shove all the money in my black cloth backpack except a five. I give that to Pax as I get in,

For gas.

Its a good thing too, cause were running out again.

5

The Thorny Bush is a gas station, restaurant, and novelty shop out in the middle of nowhere,

but its still a happening place somehow. People coming for fried chicken and potato wedges,pumping gas, talking on cell phones, all running around like their sheeple heads have been

cut off.All these families smiling and taking pictures and humming little ditties about nothing.

All while one of the biggest pot dealers in the county lives behind it in a government run

abyss known as the Hayseed Apartments. They are listed in the telephone book as GHPP

Block 48-101. GHPP means Government Housing for PoorPersons. There are a ton of those here.

They mark the county landscape like bars and parking lots. I, myself, live in GHPP Block

1-26, apartment 8, but locally my building is called the L. Grey Rooms. Its kind of confusing,but we members of the social un-elite have a lot of time to consume. In between marrying our

cousins and making moonshine, of course.

I utilize the now empty soda can as an ashtray and wait as Pax goes about the business ofpurchase. There is a man also waiting on the other side of the gas pump. An angular face

with blond hair and Air Force blue eyes in a smooth dark pickup. I went to school with him. Icant place his name, but I remember him on the field during football practices after school. I

only being there for detention due to tardiness because the children must suffer for parental

ineptitude. Now, doesnt that make sense?

I hate his face. Hes too good looking, his cheekbones are too sharp. All the days I spent being

harassed by his friends. The humiliation I went through. All those nights wasted dreaming of


11/22

a prince to come rescue me. A savior that is still absent. Its no wonder I quit when I wassixteen. I was above them and below them at the same time when I really wanted to be in the

middle with them. Safe unfeeling, nonthinking faces in cramped hallways. I almost wish I

couldve been like them, all the same.

Now, I cant even remember his fucking name. I can only remember what he represents.

I wonder if the volume of this guitar solo on the radio is bothering him over there?

The main parts of me dont care, but there is a little piece in there screaming, I hope it makesyour ears bleed! You garish ape motherfucker!

But his ears do not bleed. He sits there in the air-conditioned protection of his shiny coated

truck staring at the cars on the highway like a automaton.

I see Pax now handling the pump from the side mirror. Sweat rolls from his hairline and I feel

so bad for him. On the bright side, hes looking damn sexy. His strawberry blond curls

feather at the ends and his semi-tattooed skin is that bronze farmer boys get when they workwith their shirts off. His muscles thick and toned from playing guitar since he was ten. Thats

nearly fifteen years of practices, creating bands, breaking bands, and finding his own soundfor live shows and the studio work hes doing now with International Incident.

Hes going to make it out of this dump and I hope Im still in town to see it.

That oughtta help. Pax says as he climbs in behind the wheel.

Great. Now, lets get to the store. My taste buds are already whimpering for wine.

He turns right out of the parking lot and is heading for the highway that runs through

Marcusville. But we stop hard as yellow vested men block off the road with a hulking signwith straight French rose letters;

ACCIDENT AHEAD

Ill take Mallard Run, it should open up past all this. Pax decides.

Shit, this means we have we have to make a huge u-turn by Fairys house. I get the feeling it

would be wise to backtrack on Open Sky Road, I wonder if anyone got hurt.

Eh, probably some dumb ass druggie like it usually is. Nobody around here can drive

anyhow and then they go and snort pillsdo they expect to drive better?

All I wanna do is get some food, some wine, and get fueled up. I keep picturing blackberrywine pouring into a cup. Succulent, rich, deep wine. Managers special wine. Wine bottles.

Aftertaste. Smell. Wine. Wine. Wine. My mouth runs dry and the heat kicks me in thestomach, Ohgodohgodohgod

Suzy Lee? What wrong?

I feel weak. Sick. I feel like I cant hold my head up.

Pax lights one of his menthols and hands it to me, Here, this might help.

I dont know if he thinks the mint will calm my stomach down or if the action of smoking willbe a distraction tactic. Either way, Ive never been one to refuse a free cigarette. I take it and


12/22

the flavor goes smoothly down. It helps, but this torridity is an unstoppable juggernaut ofwarfare, mentally and physically.

All the houses on Mallard Run look the same. The same faux bricks, the wood porches, and

the same two family oriented cars being washed and waxed in their identical driveways.

Inside, its a man, a woman, and their two children. The ones with at least one son feel

superior to the ones with daughters and everyone goes fishing or swimming in the man madeponds they all have in front of their houses. How a dismal existence is tolerated is beyond me.

We come out the mouth of Mallard Run by the abandoned auto shop, What the hell is this?

A couple of fire trucks sit idly while two men in vests wave off all the cars coming their way.

A third man is putting up another accident sign. Paxs anger has soured him, Were going to

run out of gas in the middle of nowhere! I hope a senior citizens bus rolled over.

A little old lady was squashed to death today, by her own purse. Apparently, it containedone bag of hard candy and fifty pill bottles. I pause, We shouldnt talk like that. Dont you

know the world is obviously against us? I dont even see a fire back thereor cars.

Fuck em, feed em fish heads. Well go to the Sir Save-A-Lot in Marcusville. He says.

Its cleaner than the one in town. Is what Ive said, but Im really thinking, They better

have good wine there.

6

One pack of garlic bologna.

One loaf of bread.

Three bottles of wine bought so cheap the smell should curl my toes.

We crack one bottle of cherry wine open as we head back towards Cherokee Forest. Pax keeps

glancing at his gas gauge, but I dont care. The day has finally begun. The alcohol sloshing inmy mouth and bouncing off my teeth is like sanctuary. If The Beast broke down right now

Im sure we could walk the twenty miles in a drunken daze.

The Beast chugs up and we cruise down. I gulp, Pax sips. I steam when the breeze comes

through the windows and he basks, Oh, doesnt that feel good?

About as good as a bloody eagle. I mumble.

Gulp.

Gulp.

Gulp.


13/22

7

Back at Paxs place, we got the blues playing on the box as we cool down.

I puked twice out the passenger window. Pax had said, Thats what you get for drinking

warm wine in the summer time. But I didnt care then, and I dont care now. I take anotherswig until my stomach is iron.

We relax and I clean out my purse, Hey, I found another five in here.

I have three bills in my wallet. Thinking of calling Clay?

Yeah.

Thats another trip to West Port, but I think we can make it.

I move over and pickup the phone. I dial the number and it rings a few times before a

familiar voice rings in my ear, Heyyo bitch!

Heyyo bitch.

You still dont have a phone? Clay asks.

No.

I bet you love it.

I do. I wish theyd turn my electric off too. I could go back to basics. I light a cigarette, Imwonderin if you could go up on Capitol Hill for me. I got a fiver.

Yeah, sure. I can later.

Ohhh?Ravens here. Im burning a CD for him. Its gonna take a while, well, I already downloaded

it so its not going to be that long. Ill call you. Hes high as hell.

I look out between the dirty blinds of Paxs living room window. Its getting dark. I dontwant to get stranded in West Port at night, Okaydont forget to call. Well be waiting.

Alright.

Bye.

Mhm, bye.

Raven.

He always shows up at the worst times. Plus, hes an asshole, but no one can do anything

about it because 1.) Hes only sixteen and 2.) my guru, Barrett The Bear Beauregard was

friends with Ravens now deceased father. In fact Ravens real name is Houston Torchia Jr.

Bear dubbed him Raven because of his black hair.

Even still, Bear has been pushing him away recently. I guess, hes been flaking off in school

and his aunt/legal guardian has been getting impatient. His aunt being friends with Bear, he


14/22

gets all the skinny. I think he feels like hes failing to teach Raven what a boy needs from afather. Id be failing too if I was trying to teach a snotty, shit head teenager like Torchia to be a

man.

And I know what theyre doing over there at Clays house. Theyre over there sitting in his

room cluttered to the ceiling with old electronics getting high listening to crappy rap music.

Torchias preference as Clay hates it, but he cant help but be a kind host.Whatd he say? Pax asks.

He said hed call for us to come over.

Aw, man. When is that gonna be?

I shrug, I dont know. Torchias over there. The phone rings and I feel a spurt of excitement,

Maybe thats him.

Hello? Pax holds the phone to his ear and a large smile crosses his pout lips, Im doing

real good, man. How are yah? He listens, he laughs, and says, Yeah, shes right here. He

hands me the phone, Here, its Bear.Hey, whats up?

Nuthin much, baby girl. Is callin to see what yall doin tonight. Is thinkin of comin over.See what Clay is doin, come out.

That sounds cool. I know hes busy right now. Ravens over there.

Bear grumbles something I cant make out, then says, An old friend of mine invited me out

to his house way out in Brownton and Id forgotten about it. I hate makin plans in advance

cause I forget em, ya know? But anyways, Is thinkin of comin over to the Lgrey.

Well, Im gonna be gettin some green here soon. It wont be much, but you know I sharewhat I got when I have it.

Hes got green too. Its so far out there, behind that old Evangelical church, but Ive never

been out there and I wanna enjoy the day. Im tired of being stuck up in this stuffy house. I

wanna get out.

Im sure youll have fun, but you should call me before you come over so I have time to walkthere.

Oookay, I sure will. His jovial tone is replaced by a stern, but quiet voice, I stole his

girlfriend in eighth grade, hope he doesnt wanna kick my ass.

I doubt he even remembers her name.

Well, girly, Im gonna give a ring to Clay. Ill do some spyin see what Ravens up to. Ill call

ya later, right, babe?

Yeppie.

Bye, baby girl.

I hang up and hand it to Pax, Ill give Clay fifteen minutes more then Ill call him again.


15/22

I need some weed. Running around in the heat, nearly mauled by dogs, stress, waiting,roadsand did I mention its HOT?

Pax cracks open a beer from the mini-fridge in the corner, Why does he even hang out with

that kid?

Hey, I was that kid once, traveling with the older bohemians. I still am, but Im old enough

to buy the liquor nowadays, even if its only cause the cashier too busy looking at my tits andnot my ID

I mean on an intellectual level. Youre smarter than any of us, but Clay and Torchia seem so

distant from each other.

Raven is smart. Ive heard him speak on philosophy, he debates finely. Hes not like Clay, but

then no one is, I dont know, he gets Clay high.

He smiles, Yah know what Bear calls Torchia?

What?

Mussolini.

Ring!

Ring!

Ring!

Goodnight Louise, that was the longest thirteen minutes of my life, Hello?

Hey Clay sounds out of breath, I was just calling to let you know I can do that thing for

you.

Very cool. Well see you in a few. I hang up and look to Pax, Get your keys.

Got em. Lets go.

8

Darkness does not creep here as it does over deserts and vast land. These are the hills and inthe hills darkness settles like a deep blanket swallowing us whole making our world here

displayed in black. The stars, moon, and headlights is what we see by on these country roads.

Thistle brush grow by the narrow highways here. The soybean and rice fields stretch beneath

the sky along this side of the river. Everything feels bigger and scarier at night. Everything isquiet and waiting.

Pax pulls up in front of the driveway of 42 Crooked Creek Hollow and Clay is already there.

Hes cut his long winter locks and now his luscious champagne hair stands in a fluid

mohawk. He smooths it back with his hand and puts on his flat cap backwards. His

sunglasses, the black and white Drunken Luddites concert tee, black suit coat, jeans, and


16/22

boots makes him a menacing six foot one statue.

He gets in the back seat, HEYYO BITCH!

Hey! I turn around in the seat, It seems so long since I saw you last. Whats it been now,

onetwo days?

He laughs. Hes getting a hand rolled cigarette from his case. Pax drives onward, How

should we do this now?

Drop me off on the corner of Keechle Street and Ill meet back up with you at my house.

Right.

Russ lives at the top of Keechle Street in a rundown cabin with his wife, his girlfriend, his son,

and his sons girlfriend. Since Keechle is on a steep hill we say, Im gonna spend me a bill upon Capitol Hill.

But Russ is secretive. For one thing, hes in the top five distributors of pot in the county and

hes got to keep his business low. For another, he has two jerk neighbors. The one on the right

breeds fighting pits (which is horrifically disgusting of you ask me) and the one on the leftdespises the fact their neighbors arepeople of dubious intent.

Weve been buying from Russ since we were fourteen thanks to Clay. Back in the beginning

we got it from dirty old man Harry or hippie Rodney, but then Russ started paying Clay to fix

his computer or do any other technological upgrade to his entertainment center.

When Clay turned sixteen, he asked Russ to pay him in weed since he usually came back tobuy it anyway. Thats how magic is weaved, I suppose.

Hey, did you hear Bobbie Mullins got arrested? Clay asks.

No! Pax and I say at the same time. Clay is laughing and were smiling, What did he do?He tried to rob his neighbor when they went on vacation. Their house sitter saw him

climbing in and out the front window. She called the police on her cell phone. He was trying

to get a stack of video games when the cops picked him up.

Oh, my God. I say, Well, all those Mullins boys have been to jail. They go and come back

just to go again three months later.

Hes facing some time on this one, though. His aunt told Mom hes looking at five years.

Five years in Marcusville State Penitentiary. Thats enough to make a man go mad. Hell

come out of there like Carl Panzram, warped and ready for war and rape. Hell listen too

much and hell learn too much. Bobbie Mullins, another boy I went to school with, has gonebecause he may be going there a boy, but he will come out a hardened criminal.

How many suicides from our graduating class, Clay? I ask.

Um, I think its five. Oh, six if you count Franky Jay Collins.

I forgot about him.

Whos Franky Jay? Pax asks.


17/22

A boy we went to school with. Hes a tragedy. I look to Clay, but he says, Tell the story,Suzy Lee. You know it better than me.

He was a football player, in our grade, and he got Brandie Evans, his girlfriend, pregnant.

She was in the grade below us. Anyway, they got married and he got a job with the lumber

mill right out of school. And you know you dont make that much money at that shit hole,

they dont even offer benefits. Well, they couldnt pay their bills, the baby was sick all thetime, and they had to move in with her mom. I guess it got too much because he blew his

brains out in their bathroom. Brandie told me she walked in from getting groceries, and all

she saw was blood. Like, all over the mirror and walls and ceiling.

Jesus. Pax stops at the corner of Keechle Street, Wait, how long have you been out ofschool?

One year. Well, one year for Clay who graduated like a good boy. Two years years for me.

Six suicides in one year? Thats depressing.

Thats life.

I need the money. Clay has his hand out waiting between the car seats.

Oh, yeah. I think youd need that, wouldnt you? I give him the five, he gets out, and starts

walking to the cabin.

It takes two seconds for Pax to park in Clays driveway and I look towards the lights glowing

through the windows of his house. I wonder if his parents ever question why we park here?

They never come out, theyre too old to shoo off hooligans.

Clay walks quickly and hes in the backseat within a blink of an eye. He talks as he gives methe weed and I put it in my purse, Do you want to come over to Paxs and smoke with us?

I do have another joint

Then wed practically have a ten sack.

But I told Bear Id save it until he got back.

Oh, he went to that guys house?

Yeah, I guess he had a fifty bag. Im so jealous, but at least Raven came over and smoked

with me.

Did you use Ole Betsey? Thats the name of Ravens gas mask he converted in to smoking

weed through.

He smiles and nods and is gone before I can say goodbye.


18/22

9

Its blacker than ever outside. Pitch, as they say. I can almost see the copperheads slithering

around in those dark weeds. The frogs croak for mates on the creek beds. Somewhere there is

an echo of a fiddle and a banjo. With every twist and turn we get closer to it then fartheraway. I can hear from the faint clapping that some people are having themselves a mighty

fine time.

Suzy Lee, I hate to tell yah this, but

But what?

The car just died.

What? But were still moving.

Were coasting.

We come to a complete halt in the middle of the road. Im thankful theres no one around,Are we gonna make it back to your house?

He shakes his head, No. I dont think we are. He tries to start the car, but it doesnt turn.

What are we gonna do? I take a quick sip of wine from my flask. There are bourbon dregs

sharpening the sweet taste.

Jed just lives right up here. We can park there and use his phone.

Couldnt he take us into town?

No. Its too late for him to be driving around. He turns the key and The Beast roars back to

life. He drives a little further up the holler and turns into Jeds driveway.

Jed Ferrell. What an old freak. Kindhearted, yes, but a pervert nonetheless. He was a policeofficer for twelve years and a prison guard for thirty before retiring. He was injured on the

job and gets a big prescription of Denaxatrine, but he doesnt really need them. Instead, his

ninety year old tanning bed ass gets the young pillheads to strip for him and they get their

hearts desire. If she dances really well, he gives them some cash too.

Now thinking about it, Pax knows Jed through one of his sisters. How did she meet him?

I get out of the car after Pax and we head to the backdoor of Jeds two-story brick home. Its anice prison for a sleaze. He knocks on the door and a girl my age answers. Shes tan with a

perfectly teased, highlighted pixie cut and a phone up to one ear, Yeah?

Jed here?

Yeah. Hold on. She steps away from the door, Jed! Some guy and somegirl are at the

door for you.

Who is it? I can hear the elderly cough in his voice.

I dont know. Her tone is snarly and ungrateful. She scratches at her nose then talks into the


19/22

phone, Yeah, Im still here.

Jed is short and stocky. His lizard like skin is mauled by suspicious moles and age spots, Ah,Paxton. His socks are loose and wiggle two inches from his toes.

Hey, man, I know its late, but my car ran out of gas. Can I leave it here until the morning?

Yes, yes. You need a lift home?

Oh, man, do we ever?

Well, walk up the hill to Joes and hell give a lift. I would, but Tonia and me are in the

middle of something.

(Gross.)

Alright, thanks.

Ill call him, let him know youre coming.

Cool, good. Thanks. Pax says with a wave of his hand.

Thanks. I mutter.

Youre welcome, Suzy. I know hes looking at my ass.

I quickly walk to keep up with Pax, What are we gonna do bout the dogs? I kind of regretdrinking all that wine earlier, but if I get attacked Ill die fast and Id rather die in a blur than

linger on in pain. No, no, not in this heat.

Pax reaches in The Beast and gets his Colt Python .357 Magnum, Four inch barrel, nickel

platted. It ought to make you feel safer.

I take it from him, What about you?

I got the .45 here. He pats his waist, And the Smith on my ankle.

Right on. Lets go.

Get your flashlight out. We have to walk a few.

I get it from my purse and we walk, Whos Joe?

Joe is Tonias boyfriend. Hes a friend of Rubys from way back. And Ruby is Paxs sister.One mystery solved.

Does he know Tonia is at Jeds?

Hell, he probably dropped her off there.

Thats sick, Pax.

Thats life, baby.

We have to climb Joes driveway. There are huge deep dips and jagged rocks embedded in

the clay dirt. I worry about snakes and wild dogs, I curse The Beast, this unbearable heat, and

Im completely out of breath when we reach the top. I fold over with my hands on my thighs,I want to kill everyone.


20/22

You usually do. Hes laughing at me and for a split second I imagine slitting his throat withmy pocketknife and flinging his body into the ravine below. Okay, maybe it was longer than

a second.

But people have seen us together, No, too many witnesses.

What?

I stand up straight and smile, Nothing.

10

Joe lives in a little blue trailer with two expensive cars in his driveway, What does Joe do?

He grows weed out on his property. He doesnt sell it, he just gets paid by somebody to use

the land. Pretty slick deal.

Id say.

Another backdoor. Another knock. Joe answers the door in a wife-beater, boxers, andflip-flops. Hes rubbing his eyes, How ya doin, brother? I was sleepin when Jed called.

Aw, Im sorry, man. But, hey, this is my friend, Suzy Lee.

Hes tall and looks down on me with dull, stoned eyes, Suzy Lee? Joe Fritz. We shake

hands, Come on, lets go. He jingles a set of keys and we line up behind him.

We get into a compact silver charmer. The leather seats squeak as I slide in. For once in his

life, Pax is the passenger, Damn, Joe. This is a nice ride.

Joe chuckles, Yeah, its pretty cool, huh? I see his long thin legs covered in hair under the

dome light, I call er Africa cause she purrs like a lion.

Why would a family four door need to purr?

11

Were in front of The Bounds. Its a shame I met scandalous Joe Fritz on such an awkwardnight. Hes an engaging man.

Im sorry I dont have any gas money for you, but I will get you back. Pax says with a sad

face.

Its all cool, man. Ive run out of gas too. It happens and Tonias bringin up some moneyfrom Jed, so we even out.

Alright. Thanks, brother. Pax gets out.


21/22

It was nice meeting you, Joe, and thanks for the ride. I say as I hop out. He waves with aslick two finger salute.

Pax turns the air-conditioning on the second were inside. Hes in his kitchen fixing a couple

of glasses of RotGut Winery Peach Citrus Medley. Seventy proof. I take a comfy seat on the

tattered red sofa and get out my notebook, weed, and my pipe from my bag. I grind the weed

over the black leather-bound notebook now sitting on my lap, Oh, fuck.Pax comes in and hands me a coffee mug of wine, Whats wrong?

I know this is gonna sound incredible after the day we had, but for the first time everRuss

screwed us. Its shit weed.

Pax falls down in his green plaid recliner, You cant win for losing.

I feel bad for telling him that. I tap his knee, Cheer up, mistro. Well get a little buzz on. I

mean, we went on an adventure today. It may seem like just another bad day to you now, but

one day youll see what I mean. We went on an adventure and no one can take it away fromus. No one.

I pack the bowl I named The Tin-man and it hits me like a bolt of lightening, Aj

Blenkinship.

Who?

It was a guy at the gas station. We went to school together, but I couldnt remember his

name.

And it just came to you?

Yeah.

Do you feel better now remembering it?I look at him in thought, No. No, not really. I think its a pretty stupid name actually.

He gives me a sideways grin, Youre a secret optimist, arent you?

I place my finger to my lips, Shush, we mustnt let anyone else know, or Ill have to killyou.


22/22

About The Author

Edward Leigh Ford was born August 1, 1965 in Portsmouth, Ohio, Scioto

County. His childhood was spent traveling throughout the Appalachian

and southern areas of the United States.

When he was eighteen, he married his school boy crush, JuliettaMoorehead, and entered the military. He served in the army during the

Gulf War. After a year of service, he was dishonorably discharged and

sentenced to five years in prison. During this time, he created the

character Suzy Lee Long, who has become his literary alter-ego in the

stories known as the Misadventures of A Female Dope Fiend.

Since his release, Mr. Ford has spent his time traveling Appalachia and

the south and writing his prose in abandoned houses and alleyways with

his wife and his girlfriend, Troyya Chan.

When not writing, Mr. Ford enjoys smoking crack at family oriented

restaurants, buying cat food (he owns no cats), and getting arrested.

E.L. Ford on the WebScribblings of A Hobo The Official E.L. Ford Blog

Facebook

Facebook Group Page

Twitter

Pinterest

Donate Bitcoin If you enjoyed this work please consider giving a donation. Any amount is

welcome. ( BTC Address: 19hWeLufFypfUmuWYELrUJZpz151hrdCKy )
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portsmouth,_Ohiohttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scioto_County,_Ohiohttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scioto_County,_Ohiohttp://edwardleighford.wordpress.com/http://www.facebook.com/edward.ford.9210http://www.facebook.com/pages/EL-Ford/204677579703821http://www.twitter.com/EdwardLFordhttp://www.pinterest.com/edwardleighford/https://coinbase.com/checkouts/cc3ed3e7b0deb21083ebbb6e97ed97e1https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scioto_County,_Ohiohttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scioto_County,_Ohiohttps://coinbase.com/checkouts/cc3ed3e7b0deb21083ebbb6e97ed97e1http://edwardleighford.wordpress.com/http://www.facebook.com/edward.ford.9210http://www.facebook.com/pages/EL-Ford/204677579703821http://www.twitter.com/EdwardLFordhttp://www.pinterest.com/edwardleighford/https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portsmouth,_Ohio

a day to forget the earth

Documents