Robert “Daddy” Nickell

NEEDS TO KNOW

SECRETS EVERYNEW DADDY10

Are you a new dad? Do you know a new daddy to be? If so, this short guide will help you through the first few months at home with your new bundle of joy.

If this is your first child, then the birth of your new baby equates to the birth of you - the new dad!

As most of the attention is on mom during the nine month preparation period, dad often gets left behind in learning about and preparing for his new life. Having a family, and the birth of your first child, will forever change your lifestyle, environment, and thought process.

Dads need to be prepared to embrace this change. Trust me, the rewards will be plentiful. Just wait until your new baby smiles at you for the first time - or the first time they call you dad!

Newborns wake up every 2-3 hours (as you have likely learned) to have their diapers changed and to eat. Yes, that means when they are up, so are you. You are in for a serious change in lifestyle. In the beginning, that means a complete lack of sleep, which means things can spiral out of control. Quickly.

Pay attention to the tips in this guide, and instill them into your daily routine.

Remember that you and your partner are in this as a team. Find ways to support and help each other out.

1. TEAMWORKRemember that you and your partner are in this as a team. If mom is breastfeeding, she will likely be up more often than you. Find other ways to help around the house and with the baby. - Make sure the house is clean. - Make breakfast in the morning. - Get up for a few extra diaper changes in the middle of the night. Be ready to jump in, change diapers, and get the baby when fussing. Do not pretend sleep, get up, and help. The one thing dad cannot do is breast feed, but dad can do everything else, so jump up and help. If you do it enough, you can almost change a diaper and re-swaddle in a semi-sleep. And if you do this as often as possible, mommy and baby will love you even more.

2. VISITORS Once you get home, you will be tired. Everyone will be exhausted, busy, sore, hungry, and in a constant state of sleep deprivation.

Dad - it is your job to keep the family and friends under control. Help reduce the number of visits, phone calls, and repetitive questions by updating people via e-mail and social media.

Daddy Tip:

If a family member or friend wants to bring food, they can say “hi” - only if the baby is awake.

If the baby is sleeping, then mom is sleeping, and nobody should disturb the peace.

3. DIAPERSLearn to change diapers. This is not difficult but it is a little different depending on whether your baby is a boy or girl. The best place to learn is at the hospital. Have a nurse help you through the first change so you feel confident when you get home. Learn the differences in using petroleum, diaper cream, moisturizing cream, and baby powder. Be the pro - mommy & baby will love you even more.

Daddy Tip:Newborn poop does not smell, so it is the easiest diaper to change.

4. SWADDLE

Not only should you learn how to swaddle your baby, you should also become the “King of Swaddling” in your home. Just as learning how to change diapers, learn how to swaddle your baby while you are at the hospital. A good swaddle makes for a happy and confident baby!

5. LOVE & AFFECTIONYou might not feel the gushy emotions for your baby right away. If you do, that is great! If not, that is okay too! Give yourself time to process and adjust to your new life. Make time to interact with your new baby one on one every single day. Believe it or not, the diaper changes, swaddles, and pacing through the house in the middle of the night will help you bond with your baby.

6. RASHES & BABY ACNEThe rash will go away.

With a newborn baby, mom & dad can get nervous if all of a sudden baby has a huge rash somewhere on the body. Calm down, be patient, and reassure your partner that it is going to be okay.

Babies can develop red spots, redness, rashes, bumps, etc. quickly and for a variety of reasons. It could be something mom is eating or even something in the environment. Most rashes will go away within 24 hours, just keep an eye on it.

If the rash persists for more than 24 hours, or your baby appears to be in severe discomfort, call or go see your doctor to make sure all is okay.

7. GET OUTSIDETake your baby for walks. If you are home, and the baby has been changed & fed, offer to take your new bundle of joy out for a walk in the stroller or carriage. Not only does this give mom a minute to go to the bathroom in peace or even take a shower, it is an excellent opportunity for you to bond with your baby.

Daddy Tip:While you are out for a walk, talk or sing to your baby. They can hear you and become accustomed to your voice.

8. ROUTINEWrite down the routine. Routines for babies are extremely important, and they are easy to lose track of when you are sleep deprived, trying to work, and not eating on a regular basis. Grab an extra notebook, dedicate it to baby, and start writing down the following: - Wake up time - Pee or poop times - What baby ate & when - Sleep times - Breast feeding information (if you are breast feeding)

With all of this information written down, you won’t have to worry about remembering the last time baby ate, or if they pooped today. You will have all of the information in one spot. You will start to learn your baby’s schedule, and suddenly, life gets easier.

9. CELL PHONEPut down your cell phone when you are with your baby. Give your baby your undivided attention when you are with them. They deserve it.

10. SUPPORTThe last and more important rule is to be supportive of your partner. Mom is always right - even if it sounds crazy. Let her have the final say. She needs to find peace, and you need to support her.

There is zero benefit in arguing over pacifiers, blankets, or types of diapers. In the long run, it is more important to spend time with your new family, and help in any possible way you can. I assure you, she will love you even more.

POSTPARTUM DEPRESSIONBe aware of symptoms of Postpartum depression. If your partner starts exhibiting any of the following symptoms, seek medical attention immediately:

- Trouble sleeping when your baby sleeps - Feeling numb or disconnected from your baby - Having scary or negative thoughts about the baby, like thinking someone will take your baby away or hurt your baby - Worrying that you will hurt the baby - Feeling guilty about not being a good mom, or ashamed that you cannot care for your baby

According to the CDC, 8 to 19% of women reported having frequent postpartum depressive symptoms.

New fathers have also experienced depression after their baby is born. Approximately 4% of fathers experience depression within the first year of their child’s life.

If you are concerned about you or your partner, contact your doctor. Don’t accuse her of anything, be supportive and express your concern.

This information was retrieved from the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (www.cdc.gov)

Good Luck out there, and remember you can always reach out to me for questions and answers!

Sincerely, Robert “Daddy” Nickell

Learn more about becoming a new dad

at daddyncompany.com

Founder and CEO of Daddy & Company, Robert (aka Daddy) Nickell, is a well known syndicated columnist for national newspapers, parenting magazines, and websites including: Baby Couture Magazine, Oh Baby! Magazine, and U & Me Magazine.

Robert P. Nickell graduated with a degree in pharmacy from the University of Pacific

School of Pharmacy (1981).

He lives in Hermosa Beach with his wife Katy, their two sons, Lincoln & Carter, their daughter Tessa, and their dogs, Max and Ruby. Robert also enjoys a wonderful relationship with his four older children

Austin, Paige, Hayden, and Kennady.

Edited by Kennady NickellKennady has a M. Ed with an emphasis in counseling

from Loyola Marymount University (2013).

Illustrated by Curt Walstead