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Navigator Week 8:Publishing Your Personal Statement

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Welcome to Week 8!Important Dates and Deadlines:• Date #1• Date #2

Last Week, We: Defined personal statement and evaluate examples Reviewed the writing process Identified a guiding idea Wrote a first draft of our personal statement Uploaded a draft to CSNav (milestone)

This Week We Will: Add heartbeat to our personal statements

Add structure to our personal statements

Peer review our personal statements

Formally request letters of recommendation

Upload a final ps to CSNav (milestone)

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Think It Through:

What makes a story interesting to read?

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“It feels good out here!” I couldn’t help but say it twice to my friends Chris, Mike, and Jay. We had been in the house since early evening playing John Madden football on Sega entertainment game system. We decided to make ham sandwiches and go sit out on the front porch. We went outside at around 10 o’clock with our food and some Pepsi to enjoy the nice, cool night. The time passed so quickly that what seemed an hour turned into three. Around 1:15 am we noticed a decline in the warm temperature so we decided to head inside for the night....”

-From “I Am” by Dale Scott

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“For as long as I can remember, fireworks have been an important part of my life. On nights of celebration, such as the Fourth of July and Cinco de Mayo, I would cross the long street from my neatly kept apartment building to the lush green park next door. The warm air carried the familiar smalls of late night barbecues and sounds of upbeat Spanish music. I loved to watch the clear dark sky burst into colorful flowers of light, dancing fearlessly as the music from the crowds below cheered them on. Even though the nights would end too soon, the fireworks would stay with me.”

-From “Firecracker” by Marcia Rodriguez

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STEP 1: Differentiate between showing and telling

“Telling” your readers something can be boring, disengaging, and sound like bragging.

“I’m a hard worker.”

“The midday sun shined down on my back as sweat soaked into my cap. I raised the hammer and thought to myself, “One more nail, one more shingle, and this family will have a roof.”

“Showing” your readers what you mean is more interesting, more engaging, and helps your reader relate to you.

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STEP 1: Differentiate between showing and telling

1990’s hair band, Extreme, said it best:

“More than words to show you feel / that your love for me is real…”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrIiLvg58SY

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STEP 1: Differentiate between showing and telling

Heartbeat are all those words, phrases, and sentences that make your writing unique. It includes showing passages, metaphors, similes, and other figurative language.

the writing process Brainstorm to find a guiding idea

Write a first draft to express personal strengths

Revise to add heartbeat

Write a second (or third, or fourth, or fifth) draft

Edit to fix mistakes

Publish a final, polish draft

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STEP 2: Outline your personal statement

Introduction

Body

Conclusion

Grab the reader’s attentionSet the tone

Show your storyUse as many paragraphs

as you need

Tie it all togetherLeave the reader thinking

What to do:Personal Statement Parts:

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STEP 3: Discuss examples of effective and ineffective ways to share your story.

Introduction

GOOD IDEASStart with the ending, then flashback to tell the whole storyStart with a voice-over from the narratorStart with the most exciting moment, and explain it in detail. Then flashback.Start with a series of images or pictures, then transition to the real storyStart with movement: walking in, walking out, running, jumping…

BAD IDEASIntroduce yourselfBe childish or immatureUse a clichéBe too obviousTell, not show

Don’t know how to start? Think about your favorite movie or book. How does it begin? What happens in the first scene, or the first chapter?

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STEP 3: Discuss examples of effective and ineffective ways to share your story.

GOOD IDEASLeave it open for a sequel.Return to where you started.Ask a provocative question (just make sure it isn’t so far removed from your

guiding idea that it doesn’t make sense with the rest of the personal statement).

Suggest outcomes, results, or consequences.Refer to the opening paragraph (the hook) by using parallel images and

thoughts or key words.

BAD IDEASBe childish or immatureUse a clichéBe too obviousTell, not show

Don’t know how to start? Think about your favorite movie or book. How does it end? What happens in the last scene, or the last chapter?

Conclusion

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STEP 4: Write a second draft of your personal statement, focusing on flow and structure.

STEP 5: Work with your peers to revise and edit your personal statement.

the writing process Brainstorm to find a guiding idea

Write a first draft to express personal strengths

Revise to add heartbeat

Write a second (or third, or fourth, or fifth) draft

Edit to fix mistakes

Publish a final, polish draft

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STEP 5: Work with your peers to revise and edit your personal statement.

the writing process Brainstorm to find a guiding idea

Write a first draft to express personal strengths

Revise to add heartbeat

Write a second (or third, or fourth, or fifth) draft

Edit to fix mistakes

Publish a final, polish draft

Editing checklistFormat

❏ 2–2½ pages (approximately) ❏ 12-point font size ❏ 1.5 or double-spaced lines ❏ Times New Roman font style ❏ Pages numbered ❏ Your name (first and last) on each

page in header or footer

Mechanics ❏ Spell check ❏ Capitalization check ❏ Grammar check ❏ Punctuation check

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STEP 6: Request Letters of Recommendation from two to three references

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Week 8 SummaryThis Week We:Add heartbeat to our personal statementsAdd structure to our personal statementsPeer review our personal statementsFormally request letters of recommendationUpload a final ps to CSNav (milestone)

Unit 2 Check-In:

By the end of Unit 2, you should have completed:A resumeA personal statementRequested 3 letters of recommendation

Are you: Ahead of the game On track A Little Behind Off track

What can you do to improve?

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CSNav How-to:

Personal Statement Milestone

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First, type your personal

statement in Microsoft Word,

or another editor.

Save your personal

statement, and remember where you saved it.

Microsoft Word

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Logon to CSNav to upload a draft of your personal

statement.

Quick Links:

Personal Statement

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The Quick Link takes you here.

Click on “Upload a final personal

statement.

Your Portfolio > Your Profile >How You See

Yourself

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Click “Browse” to open a pop-up

window

Upload a draft personal

statement

Find your document and click “Open”

Be sure to click “Upload and save” to get your

checkmark!

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After you click “Upload and

Save,” you will see the name of your document

here.

You will now receive a

checkmark for the milestone.

Your Profile > How You See Yourself > My

Personal Statement

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To see your checkmark, go

back to “Home” by clicking on the icon on the top of the page.

Then, click “Your Planning

Milestones” to see your

checkmarks.

Your Planning Milestones