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Marriage! Marriage! The JourneyThe Journey

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Session 1Session 1The Journey begins!The Journey begins!

Can anyone relate to the Can anyone relate to the thinking expressed by the thinking expressed by the husband or wives in the husband or wives in the

examples on pgs. 15-16?examples on pgs. 15-16?

If so, can you share from your If so, can you share from your own experience?own experience?

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Can someone tell us – Can someone tell us – whatwhat does the word does the word T.I.R.E.D.T.I.R.E.D. mean?mean?

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When we struggle to be filled by our old Strategies in marriage, we wind up T.I.R.E.D. An acronym by Jeff VanVonderan.

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T.T. TrappedTrapped

II .. Indicted Indicted

R.R. ResponsibleResponsible

Often we begin to ruminate over slights, Often we begin to ruminate over slights, irritations, unfairness, etc. We feel under the irritations, unfairness, etc. We feel under the circumstances - as if we can’t get out.circumstances - as if we can’t get out.

Feeling accused, and furthermore, sentenced.Feeling accused, and furthermore, sentenced.

Or, over-responsible, which leads to resentmentOr, over-responsible, which leads to resentment.

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E.E. ExposedExposed

D.D. DefensiveDefensive

Feeling vulnerable to be devastatingly hurt, Feeling vulnerable to be devastatingly hurt, unprotected, all weaknesses and fears known.unprotected, all weaknesses and fears known.

Being defensive can range from Being defensive can range from withdrawing, being silent, and hiding to withdrawing, being silent, and hiding to arguing and demanding.arguing and demanding.

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Can anyone describe a time Can anyone describe a time when you felt when you felt

T.I.R.E.D.T.I.R.E.D. ??

Who can relate toWho can relate to the following the following

song?song?

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1111

A Few Years AgoA Few Years Ago:“Will you fill my emptiness and drive away my loneliness?

Will you promise you will be true to meAnd always treat me tenderly? Will you sigh with me when I am sad, &Will you smile with me when I am glad?

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Think it over and be sure, and please don’t answer until you do.

And when you promise all these things to me,

I’ll give my heart to you.”

What is the songWhat is the songtrying to say?trying to say?

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What are some common viewsWhat are some common viewsaround the purpose of marriagearound the purpose of marriage

oror the ideal marriage partner?the ideal marriage partner?

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Let’s discuss Let’s discuss THE MAPTHE MAP

Turn to Turn to page 30page 30 in your book. in your book. There’s There’s a map a map in scripture that is in scripture that is

symbolic of the Christian’s passage symbolic of the Christian’s passage through life and can also be applied through life and can also be applied to the marriage journey. to the marriage journey. What is this What is this map?map? It’s the Biblical account of the It’s the Biblical account of the Israelites coming out of Egypt and Israelites coming out of Egypt and eventually to the promised land. eventually to the promised land.

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EgyptEgypt WildernessWilderness CanaanCanaan

Red

Sea

The Journey: The Journey: The MapThe Map

J

ord

an

LawLaw

Bondage, Bondage, CaptivityCaptivity

Promised Promised LandLand

InheritanceInheritance

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EgyptEgypt Wilderness.Wilderness. CanaanCanaan

Red

Sea

The Journey: The Journey: The MapThe Map

J

ord

an

Surrender

New Birth

Power Struggles,

hurts in marriage Fulfillment

Needs met

Humility, dying to Humility, dying to fleshly Strategiesfleshly Strategies

Walk after the flesh. Walk after the flesh. “Myths” and “Myths” and LawsLaws

Walk after the SpiritWalk after the Spirit

Bondage Bondage

Sin natureSin nature

“ “S

urv

ival

Str

ateg

ies”

Su

rviv

al S

trat

egie

s”

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What does each of us bring into the What does each of us bring into the marriage relationship?marriage relationship?

Are all of these ideas “the Are all of these ideas “the beginning” of our problems, or beginning” of our problems, or

does it go back further?does it go back further?

If so, when?If so, when?