1 jokes, joke cycles and practical jokes by don l. f. nilsen and alleen pace nilsen
TRANSCRIPT
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Jokes, Joke Cycles and Practical Jokes
by Don L. F. Nilsen and
Alleen Pace Nilsen
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KETCHUP:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQQD9bPrUPU
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Joking Relationships
• Joking relationships occur between two persons in which one is by custom permitted and in some instances required to tease or make fun of the other.
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EXAGGERATION & SURPRISE
• Exaggeration and surprise are features that can be found in most jokes.
• Bill Dana demonstrates that the same joke can be told with only the details and local color changing, and the rest of the joke remaining the same.
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FIRST TELLING
• A large group is assembled in an auditorium when from the loudspeaker comes the message:
• “Will the person with New York license plate BL 74468459030623145098725, kindly remove it? Your license plate is blocking traffic.”
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SECOND TELLING
• Two cowboys are talking and the first one explains that the name of his ranch is the “Bar Nine Circle Z Rocking O Flying W Lazy R Happy Two Flying Nun Ranch.”
• A second cowboy asks if he has many cattle, and the first cowboy responds, “Not many survive the branding.”
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THIRD TELLING
• Two football players are talking and one of them begins describing a heroic run he made during the final game of the season.
• “Nobody on the opposing team could tackle him….
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• Finally, “they brought a cannon out onto the field, and they shot me with the cannon,
• and then airplanes came down with machine guns. They still couldn’t stop me. And I finally made a touchdown.
• The other player indignantly interjects that “Anybody who was in the stadium could prove that was a lie.”
• The first player responded, “There were no survivors.”
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FAKE PLAY: PIANO JUGGLER:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07brW206D84
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JOKE CYCLES
• Very often jokes occur in joke cycles. Consider the following joke cycles.
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ACRONYM JOKES
• These jokes are often found on vanity license plates or bumper stickers:
• 10SNE1 (tennis anyone?)
• XQUSME (excuse me)
• 4RGRAN (for our grandchild)
• BS, MS, PhD (Bull Shit, More of the Same, Piled Higher and Deeper)
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LIGHTBULB JOKES
• How many New Yorkers?• 3: One to do it and two to criticize.
• How many grad students?• 3: 2 plus a professor to take the credit
• How many Jewish mothers?• None: I’ll just sit in the dark.
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• How many Los Angeles Police?• 6: one to do it and five to smash the old bulb
to smithereens.
• How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
• 2: but they have to be really small.
• How many Dolly clones?• As many as you’d like. As many as you’d
like. As many as you’d like.
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LIGHT BULB JOKE VARIATION:
• What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
• You can unscrew the light bulb.
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NEW DEFINITIONS
• Artery: The study of painting
• Bacteria: The back door of a cafeteria
• Barium: What doctors do when patients die.
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A Practical Joke
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A practical joke is possible here, but in this clip everything is legitimate.
NOTE: This one is legitimate; however there is another tennis-ball piano player who has the tune preprogramed into the keyboard, and all he has to do is hit the keyboard anyplace at the right time.
TENNIS-BALL PIANO PLAYER:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07brW206D84
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SNIGLETS
• Rich Hall invented the term “sniglet” for a word that should be in the dictionary, but isn’t.
• Elbonics (el bon’ iks) n. The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater.
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• Esso Asso (eso a’so): The person behind you in a right-hand turn lane who cuts through the Esso Station.
• Pupkus (pup’kus) n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog presses its nose to it.
• Phonesia (fo nee’ zhuh) n. The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.
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TOM SWIFTIES
• People who used to read the Tom Swift novels invented a new type of joke:
• “My name is Tom, he said Swiftly.”
• This pattern is extended to:
• “I’d like my egg boiled,” she whispered softly.”
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• “Get to the back of the boat!” he shouted sternly.
• “Would you like another pancake?” she asked flippantly.
• “She works in the mines,” he roared ironically.
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TOP TEN LIST
• In 1993 when David Letterman left NBC to move to a better time slot at CBS, he made a list of his “Top 10 Things I Have To Do Before I Leave NBC.” Here are some of the items on that list:
• Drop off hairpiece at security desk.
• Vacuum out Wendell (his announcer) and write down his mileage.
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• Steal my weight in office supplies.
• Let my plastic surgeon step out and take a bow—this has been his show as much as mine.
• Get one more cheap laugh by saying the word Buttafuoco.
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TRICK PLAY IN FOOTBALL:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKE9SFCe0HU
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VIRUS JOKES
• AT&T Virus: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.
• MCI Virus: Every three minutes it reminds you that you’re paying too much for the AT&T virus.
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• Paul Revere Virus: This revolutionary virus does not horse around. It warns you of impending hard disk attack—once if by LAN, twice if by C:>.
• New World Order Virus: Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it.
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EPIPHANY
• What all jokes seem to have is an epiphany. So here is a joke that illustrates the nature of epiphany:
• A man has been a customer in a particular restaurant for twenty years. He sits down to his regular dinner and immediately calls the waiter over to his table and demands that he “taste the soup.”
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• The waiter is most apologetic and says, “I’m sorry sir. What’s wrong? Here, let me get you another bowl.”
• “Taste the soup!” demands the irritated customer.
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• Again the waiter apologizes and leans forward to whisk away the offending bowl.
• “No!” demands the customer, who by now is irate: “Taste the soup.”
• The humbled waiter leans over to obey and asks in surprise, “Where’s the spoon?”
• “Ah ha!” cries the customer.
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A Parodyand A Parody of a Parody
BUSH ON GLOBAL WARMING (BILL FERRELL TAKEOFF):http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOjfxEejS2Y&feature=related
BUSH ON GLOBAL WARMING (KID TAKEOFF):http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWdiHtv6T6s
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