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Managing Challenging and Stressful SituationsCapacity Building Seminar Edinburgh, Scotland 10th to 12th September 2011 Dr. Dasha Grajfoner

+Shelter

How well did you listen to the others in your group?

Did you feel heard?

Did you allow yourself to be pressured into changing your mind?

Were you too stubborn that so that the group couldn't reach a decision?

Did you feel you had the right answer?

What do your own selections say to you about your values?

What surprised you about your choices or the selections of other groups?

What assumptions did you make about gender? Race? etc.

+What are your challenges and stressors?

+Range of Challenges and Stressors

Internal

External:

Within your close relationships

Within trans/LGBT community

Outside trans/LGBT community

+What is Stress and Challenges?

Stress and challenge results from an imbalance between the demands we perceive to be under, and the resources we think we have.

The difference relates to how stressed or challenged we feel. Bigger the difference, more stressed we are.

+Signs of Stress

Physical: chest pain, colds, no sex drive, digestion problems

Behavioral: eating/sleeping too much or too little, procrastinating, staying in, drinking and smoking

Emotional: feeling lonely, irritable, moody, overwhelmed, anxious, depressed

Cognitive: poor concentration, judgment, memory, worry, seeing negative

+How do you cope with stress?

+Circle of control

In Control

No Control

+How do you resolve conflicts?

+Conflict resolution

1. Know yourself

2. Identify personal needs

3. Choose safe negotiation place

4. Active listening

5. Clearly express your needs

6. Use problem solving and appreciative inquiry to identify problems/options

+Preventing conflicts

Stop

Listen

Observe

Respond

+How do you manage deadlocks?

+Manage deadlock

How it feels

Reframe the issue

Break it down

Restate others point of few

Be flexible

Affirm areas of agreement

Explore best alternatives

+How do you look after yourself?

+Looking after yourself

Prioritize your issues and tasks

Set SMART goals: Specific Measurable Attainable Realistic Timely

Plan small steps

Appreciate what you have achieved

+Looking after yourself

Address conflicts as soon as possible if you can

Identify your strengths in the situation and use them

Focus on positive aspects of the situation and write them down

Delegate and ask for help

+Looking after yourself

Responsibility Pies – We did not get the office space we wanted