you make the difference! · you make the difference! ... talk about what you will do—and what you...

Middle School - Class 1

Name: _______________

YOU Make the Difference!

Lesson Book

Ross Sterling Middle School

Downloaded on 24-Apr-2013 at 09:55 by 205.196.190.199.X02691563

Humble, Texas

Licensed for distribution by Ross Sterling Middle School through October 2013.

Copyright © 2012 The Parent Institute®

Realizing the American Dream Family Engagement ProgramStock #5P03X

The ultimate goal of the classes you are beginning today is to help you make sure that your child is successful right now in middle school, graduatesfrom high school and proceeds on to higher education.

Schools are very important. But studies prove that YOU actually have more impact on your child’s school successthan schools do. And you don’t have to be trained as ateacher or have a university degree.

Objectives In today’s class, you will:

1. Understand the changes that occur in middle school students.

2. Learn how to climb the “Success Ladder” to help your child achieve academic success and have the opportunity to go on to higher education upon graduationfrom high school.

3. Understand how to make a commitment to success.

4. Understand how to make your success expectations clear.


Middle SchoolLesson Book—Class 1

“The longest journey begins with a single step.”

~ Lao-tzu,Chinese philosopher

1Downloaded on 24-Apr-2013 at 09:55 by 205.196.190.199.X02691563




Notes:


1. Understanding Your Changing Child

Your child is growing up—and you’re doing your best to keep up.One day your child is respectful and loving; the next day (or hour),

you’re not even sure that’s your child. Welcome to adolescence! But don’t worry. Your child’s emotional and physical behaviors are

typical of middle schoolers. With the onset of puberty, usually aroundage 10 in girls and age 12 in boys—although it can be earlier or later—your child is undergoing tremendous physical and emotional changes.

Social and emotional developmentYou may notice that your middle schooler will:

• Test his limits by questioning authority, choosing different friends and clothing—and even attempting risky behaviors. While your child may act fearless and think he’simmortal, keep in mind that he can also be emotionally fragile. Get to know his friendsand their parents.

• Have an increasing need to “belong” and “fit in” at school. The pressure to look, act and dress like everyone becomesvery important. Your child wants to be just like everyone—and he also wants to be liked by everyone. It’s importantthat you help your child develop the confidence and valueshe needs to deal with any negative peer pressure.

• Crave independence. Your child is anxious to fit in, but atthe same time, he is eager to become independent. Whileit’s important to keep him safe and discourage dangerousbehavior, you can also help him take on more responsibilities. But don’t bend importantfamily rules.

• Expect more privileges. Explain that privileges and responsibility go hand in hand.When your child demonstrates responsibility, he earns your trust. Giving him privilegesis a way to express your trust.

• Need you to be involved. Your child is growing into his own person and his friends arevery important to him. But you are too! Your child still needs (and wants) your love, careand respect. But remember that you are his parent—and not his friend. Be there to sup-port him as he makes new choices and faces consequences. Show that you value hisnew maturity by asking his opinion. Then remember to listen—really listen. Learnabout your child’s changing identity.






Physical developmentWhile kids all develop at their own pace, some of the most noticeable changes will be:

• An increased awareness of the opposite sex.

• A rapid increase in height, particularly in boys.

• Clumsiness (because of rapid physical growth) in boys and girls.

• Big bursts of energy contrasted with periods of idleness.

Some of the most significant changes your child will experience in middle school are all in his head. Literally! Your child’s brain is developing. And as it develops, he is better able to:

• Engage in complex and abstract thoughts.

• Think critically and express his ideas.

• Understand right and wrong.

Remember, it’s just when your child is pushing you away the hardest that he needs you themost. So continue modeling behavior expectations for your child during the middle-schoolyears. And when you’ve had enough of his surly attitude and mood swings—take a deepbreath. This, too, shall pass.

But what will never pass is the crucial role you play in his ultimate success in school andin life. Kids whose parents believe in them and are involved in their education are more likelyto finish high school. They’re also more likely to attend a university one day. That means yourchild’s success tomorrow has a lot to do with the support you give him today.

Your child is maturing into a wonderful adult, but be aware that the process can affectyour child’s focus on schoolwork. So keep emphasizing the importance of school and yourexpectation that he will excel academically. The more you see your child as a smart, capableyoung person, the more apt your child will be to see himself the same way.




Notes:


2. Climb the ‘Success Ladder’ With Your Child

It takes more than wishes and good intentions to make sure that your child is happy, healthy and successful in life! Realizing the dreams you have for your child requires

careful planning and step-by-step action—starting right now in middle school.

Learn how to climb the ‘Success Ladder’! Step 1. Commit to your child’s success. You and your family must make a commitment to help your child achieve academic success—and get a higher education after high school.

Step 2. Expect success. Talk with your child about your expectations. Talk about what you will do—and what you expect your child to do—to ensure his success.

Step 3. Become a partner in your child’s success. Many people are available to help your child. Meet them and learn how to work together to achieve your goal.

Step 4. Understand the academic standards and requirementsyour child must meet to graduate. Learn about the roles of schools and of parents. Find out how grades are determined. Learn the meanings of terms and concepts such as: GPA, PTA,Special Ed, Four-Year Plan, etc.

Step 5. Focus on academic success factors. Spend time on things that will make a big difference for your child—communication, discipline, self-esteem, motivation, reading,responsibility and planning for the future.

Step 6. Make a “Success Plan.” Learn how to make a plan tol help your child succeedacademically and go on to higher education. Include what each of you will do daily,weekly and each grading period.









Notes:


3. Commitment is the First Step to Success

You’re not just determined to help your child succeed in school and after graduation. You’recommitted! But commitment is more than a feeling. It’s a series of actions that raise the

chances of success. The more you go from thinking about success, to talking about it, to doing something, the greater your chances it will happen.

Take all of the commitment steps As a family:

1. Make a conscious decision to do something. Set a long-term goal, such as “Our familywill make school success and higher education a top priority.” But commit to short-term goals, as well. For example, “We’ll spend homework time together.”

2. Decide when you will do it. Imagine you’ve committed to a family study time. Choose adeadline for when you will implement it. It should be sometime soon, but also leavetime for discussion and planning.

3. Plan how you’ll do it. Write down specifics. “Juan will do homework, read or reviewfrom 4:30 to 6:00 p.m. each school day. Mom or Dad will stay nearby to supervise, readand do chores. All homework will be checked by Mom or Dad immediately.”

4. Promise someone that you’ll do it. Positive peer pressure can help you reach the finishline. Tell a caring relative or friend—or even one of your child’s teachers or counselor—about your plan.





If you: Likelihood of Success

1. Make a conscious decision to do something ......................... 25%

2. Decide when you will do it ...................................................... 40%

3. Plan how you will do it ............................................................. 50%

4. Promise someone else that you will do it .............................. 65%

5. Make a specific future appointment with the person to whom you made the promise. Report whether you’ve done it ................................................. 95%

Visualize yourself being successful—and you’re almost there!


5. Make a future appointment with the person to whom you made the promise, at whichtime you’ll report whether you’ve done it. You might say, “Grandma, we’ll call Fridaynight and tell you about our homework success!”

Successful people, from Michael Jordan to Albert Einstein, have all said the same thing: They imagined themselves in a situationwhere they were successful. So don’t forget to visualize success—picture yourself achieving your goal.

Making a commitment is exciting—and sometimes a little overwhelming. But once you start planning, confidence soars! Your family will see that small steps lead to BIG success!




Notes:


4. To Get Success, Expect it!

It’s easy to expect things of your child. Be kind. Make friends. Succeed in school. Earn a university degree. The challenge is to have your expectations met!

Remember that your child cannot make and carry out a plan for success alone. You havethe experience, the maturity and the knowledge about the importance of education. Yourchild does not. There is power in your expectations. Without your expectations, it would bemuch more difficult for your child to succeed.

Make the most of your expectations

When setting expectations for your child, follow five basic rules:

1. Choose carefully. What’s best for your child? What is mostimportant for your child to do right now? Have your childmake a list of positive goals, such as “Finish my historyreport on time,” “Get a B on the next math test” and“Participate in an after-school activity.” Review the list with your child. Talk about how these goals may relate tofuture goals, including higher education after graduation.

2. Be clear. Make sure your child understands what yourexpectations are. Use simple language and specific examples. “To succeed in school, you have to finish your homework every day. That’s what I expect of you.”Remember to keep the focus on your child’s effort. When your child works hard and gives her best effort, success will follow.






3. Be reasonable. It’s tempting to set expectations that are too low (because they’re easy to meet) or too high (because the goals are appealing). Set expectations for your childthat are challenging, yet within reach.

4. Be confident. Research shows that believing inkids helps them do much better in school andin life. So believe in your child—and show it!Say things like, “I’m excited about the reportyou’re writing. You’re going to learn so muchfrom it!”

5. Be a role model. Your child is not the only one who should meet expectations. Let yourchild see that you also meet your commitments at home and at work. If you live up toexpectations you show that: 1) it’s possible and 2) it leads to success!

Meeting expectations is cause for celebration• Talk about how great it feels!

• Share your own experience. “I was intimidated by a project at work, but I stuck with itevery day. Now I’m so happy it’s done!”

• Tell your child, “You’ve already finished the first draft of your history report. That’s agreat accomplishment!” The more expectations your child meets—especially with yoursupport—the closer she’ll be to realizing her dreams.




Notes:


My To-Do List for the Coming Week

1. Talk with my child about my commitment and expectation that he or she will graduatefrom high school and go on to higher education.

2. Talk with family members about my commitment that my child will continue with studiesafter high school.

3. Make an appointment to meet with my child’s teachers or counselor. Talk about how mychild is doing and our family’s expectation that he will graduate from high school and goon to higher education. Ask what I can do to help at home.

4. Call my class partner. Make plans to attend next week’s class.





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