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Nidhi Kadam

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You can Negotiate anything Omnipresent Negotiation

The TIP

Upside DownPersonalizing

Moving UpAt the Top

TelephoneMemorandum

Negotiation StylesWin-WinWin-Lose

ConflictsDifficult People

Negotiation Stages

Negotiation redefined

@ the End

Omnipresent NegotiationWhether we know it or we don’t, we negotiate all the time at home and at work both.for..

etc.

Everything that’s product of a negotiation, is negotiable. The list consists of virtually every thing.

Learn techniques of Negotiating to do it well.3

Security Status

Justice

Money

Love

Freedom

Recognition

Rights

SpaceBenefit

ReputationEgo

Need

Luxury

Promotion

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Here’s the TIPThe T.I.P. is nothing but the three most crucial elements in any negotiation -

@Home-Consider kids creating embarrassing situations for their parents in public, to get something they want, say toys etc. They are well aware (information) that in public (time) their parents may not use their power, so they use their own power

Power, like beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. It’s simply the capacity or ability to get things done. It changes the reality and helps in achieving goals.

Consider same parents and kids at home. Whose time favors there? And who is in the power? The parents know everything (information) to simply control the same kids differently.

@Work -Lets replace kids with subordinates, parents with boss, home with office, public with clients or other teams or big bosses. Doesn’t the situation change entirely? Only the three crucial elements remain intact in any negotiation – Time, Information & Power.

Information PowerTime

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Turning Upside Down

UpDown

Personalizing is one of the tactics to turn

negotiation upside downIndex

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Take it Personally, and tell others that you do

Others are comfortable when they can identify with you. Learn as much as you can, about them and their families. Let them know about you, your family, job,

organization, hobbies and interests.

People with decent personalities and even power may not achieve their objectives if they fail to personalize. Long liked politicians meet people one by one and seek their commitments individually. People easily shaft others if they don’t

see them in personal terms. Get the other parties emotionally involved.

Wear reasonable dress, manners and decorum as per the situation. Appear responsible, suitable, desirable.

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Moving UPHow to proceed in negotiation with any organization like a School, Income Tax dept., Insurance company etc. after trying all ways and failing?

The process of moving up in the organization starts from trying your best at the down level.

Move up

Phone call

Try to personalize while stating your

problem on the phone.

Ask the full name and contact details of the

person entertaining the phone call. It will be needed for the next

follow up steps

If he can’t think of solutions, help him find

them.

Follow up once

This could be again on phone or via e-mail or a letter to the person

who attended the phone call.

Remind him that you’re counting on him.

Follow up last time

Do it just before the deadline of the task.

As this is 3rd time you are contacting the

same person, you can be friendly with him while checking the

progress.

Visit him if required and be loud enough

and personalize so that his surrounding feels

an obligation to assist.

Move up

If you’ve acted

honestly and believe that you’re right then you can

move up.

Invest time in

negotiating with a

person who has

considerable authority.

If a person lacks the

authority, go to next level.

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How’s it at the Top?Higher authorities are aware of the big picture and visualize the fall out caused by improper handling.

They know general rules do not cover specific situations.

They get paid to take risks and make decisions. Offer them a chance to amend their policies in light of your particular situation. Often they are grateful for such opportunities.

Get their commitment as they try to do everything to honor their commitments. They take their commitments as a matter of their integrity and principle.

Never approach anyone in

aggression. Otherwise issue

will shift from lack of proper service

to lack of manners.

Do not complain. Just let your

circumstances be known well.

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Telephone Negotiation

If you are stronger, you will win on phone for sure. If you are weak, wait until you are in power; it changes with time. Long distance calls could be source of information as if you don’t talk, they will, to make the costly call is worthy.

Use Telephone in a way that it works for you, not against you. A dry run in mind may work. Be ready with paper, pen, calculator, laptop at arm’s reach in a quiet place. You should have access to relevant facts. Admit lack of knowledge with dignity.

People are impersonal on phone and stick to the point. It’s much quicker way. Quick means risk involved if not prepared in advance.

It’s easy to get a No over the phone. For Yes, meet in person. But in person meetings must justify time, travel and expense.

Due to lack of getting feedback, body language on phone, there are chances of misunderstandings, hidden meanings in tone. Summarize before ending the

call and discuss next course of action or follow ups.

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Memorandum of Agreement

While writing, you are more attentive, disciplined and a better listener.

If you write, you can choose what to mention and omit. If people question you, it’s your choice to give them a hard time or to accept the amendments.

Big bosses ignore the minor issues and appreciate you for your hard work.

The pen is mightier than a pat and a promise.

Tell the parties after in-person or telephonic negotiation, that you would pass on the write-up after the discussion is over.

It becomes framework of future revisions.

You can use the notes in successive meetings and others who mock at it initially would also want to refer to it later provided it’s readable to them

Note down selectively whatever benefits you.

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Negotiation Styles I UWin Win

Win-Win StyleWin-Lose Style

Win Lose

Mutual SatisfactionOpponent is an

associateRelationships

flourish

Collaborative Style

Competitive Style

Winning at all costs.Opponent is an adversary.

Relationships vanish.

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Win-WinAs two parties may crave for different victories and both

may win.

Boss and subordinate both can go to the top together, climbing one-one step each.

Find out what other side wants, show them the way to get that while you get what you want.

The heart of Win-win is to find out what others want?

Sometimes even they don’t know what satisfies them? Sometimes they may not reveal it to us so easily.

People may not talk about their psychological needs in fear of their use against them.

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Win-LoseThis approach has limited

applicability. E.g. Insurance companies, Legal system.

Even if you never use it, you must be able to recognize it in order to

not to get victimized by it.

After all a tactic perceived is no more a tactic.3 Options to play safe against Win-

Lose (Soviet Style) –

Apply other techniques and change win-lose to win-win.

Invest more time and energy to turn it into I-win, You-lose.

Walk away but keep your alternatives ready.

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Conflicts

Knowledge –We might be exposed to different data and facts leading to different conclusions. So we should share knowledge, relevant ideas, feelings, needs to provide others the substance from which our outlook has been developed. This is how others will understand us.

Conflicts are unavoidable parts of our lives. It may arise even when the goals are same but the ways to achieve the goal are different. E.g. Any sports team.

In conflict situations find out where you agree and where you do not.

Motive should always be – do not argue, do learn.

Usually the root cause would be among these three – Experience, Role & Information.

Experience –We don’t see things as they are but as we are. We are all products of our own

experiences and environments. Get inside each other’s worlds and understand their behavior. With passing time we learn about others.

Role –When everything is same, the prosecutor and the defense attorney still

advocate differently. Each of us feels that we are good and guided by God.

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Difficult People

Always address others with tact and concern for their dignity, even when they are obnoxious.

The only way to disarm them is a positive approach that conveys expectations.

Most people try to be accommodating and tend to behave the way you expect them to behave.

But the response you receive is determined solely by how you do it?

Use lubricant demeanor to soften your words and minimize friction.Would you help…I might have heard you say…

Avoid legal (or 3rd party) indulgences as whichever side wins, none of the lawyers or mediators is a loser.

At times you may not win despite being right. The other side may be just so stubborn to accept the failure at any cost.

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Stages of NegotiationProcess Stage Formal Event

Process Stage –It starts weeks or months before the actual negotiation (formal event). Ability to use the present in anticipation of the future makes all the difference.

Build Trust, the sooner the better –When we place trust in others, they tend to justify our faith. No one tells you anything worthwhile unless you are trusted with the information. So you can’t proceed ahead without this.

Gain Commitment –Gain goodwill and credit in Process Stage as the same actions earn minus and debits in the Formal Stage.

Manage Opposition –Diagnose the cause of potential disagreement (Experience, Role, Information). And work on them.

Formal Event –Continue to build common ground. Remember when the body moves, the head follows.

Start with a positive approach, like –Dear Friends, as we all agree that we are gathered here for the common purpose …

Gain everyone’s individual agreement on the problem statement.

Throughout concentrate on the ends and not the means.

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NegotiationIt is not just exchange of material objects like money or goods.

Use of right blend of tact, apathy, curtsey, consideration, persistence, affability and thoughtfulness

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It is a way of behaving that develops Understanding, Belief, Acceptance, Respect and Trust.

It’s manner of approach, tone

of voice, attitude,

methods, and concern

exhibited for other side’s feelings and

needs.

If you fail to plan, you plan to fail.

Forewarned is forearmed.

He’s free who knows how to keep in his own hands the power to decide.

I trust that the end of this journey marks the beginning of a rewarding and liberating phase of your life.

You have the power to change your life and the lives of others as well..

@ the end..

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