what my brother taught me

8/13/2019 What My Brother taught me

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Draw the Lessons that the author learned from his brother, Chris "The Bud" Jordan.

By Geoff Jordan.

I can't remember living without my brother around. We are very close in age. I am 31 and Chris will be

3 on !ug "#$ "%. We are " months a&art. Chris is the middle child.

Chris$ nicnamed ()he Bud( by friends and family$ gets around with a waler and in a wheelchair. *e

taes meds to control a sei+ure disorder and his vision is limited. Chris is legally blind but on good dayshe can tell you what year and model Chrysler you are cruising beside as he loves cars. ,y brother uses

1- of everything he has to do the things that are refle/ to us. I have learned to wait and watch him.

)his has taught me &atience. )his is why I believe (an ! for effort($ beats an ! for the result. 0ou can

only get 1 on a test$ unless there is a bonus uestion$ but you can e/ceed that with the effort it taesgetting there ... even if it taes longer. Chris is different 2ust as we are all different from each other. ,y

family is very close and they all have taught me things that mae me W. Geoffrey J. (We are &art of all

that we have met ...( as my mother athleen$ !! (4ocrates($ often says uoting )ennison or someone

&hiloso&hical.

The Jordan oasis

We are one noisy family. Because of that I can slee& 2ust about anywhere. I thin I could find a

comfortable s&ot to lay my head at a roc concert. )he Jordan 5asis$ as I refer to my home growing u&$was Grand Central 4tation. 6eo&le were always coming and going. Chris and I shared a room as little

guys and he also made his fair share of wavelengths and vibrations. *e loved the sound of a vacuum

cleaner$ car engines$ taling on the &hone$ music$ ta&e recordings of his own voice imitating teachers at

school and slamming doors. *e would stand and o&en and close a door - times. *e en2oyed that for a

while there. ids are re&etitive and if you have ears that can hear the bluegrass grow down in )e/as you

certainly want to e/&lore and mae sounds of your own. Chris' hearing$ sense of smell and touch are

heightened from relying on them. *e can tell who you are from the sound of your wal if he nows you

and smells a fire before it is lit. )he ta&e recorder routine let us now what was really going on at school

for him. *e had the 6! system lingo down to his own little bit of standu&. It was re&etitive but funny. *e

also loved giving us his version of the weather forecast over and over again recorded on a buly ta&e

recorder. )he &lay$ sto&$ fast forward and rewind buttons were &ainted a bright green$ red$ yellow and

blue res&ectively. )here were thundershowers in the morning and sunshine and high tem&s in theafternoon 7 sometimes snow too. )hese forecasts were often abru&tly interru&ted by other 6!

announcements on &laybac. )hese were his little (sits( that he recorded$ rewound with the audio on 7

(!lvin and the Chi&muns style( and then listened to. *e would then rewind or fast forward the ta&e to

start the &rocess again.

Chris is now a man and lie all boys you grow u& a hec of a lot in your teenage and adolescent years and

you become more mature. Chris lie all ids grew u& too and I got to watch him. !s a boy$ I used to run

around the house in my underwear with a &illow case tied around my nec 7 arms out in front of me 7record &layer blasting through the stereo system to the theme music of (4u&erman(8 I ran circles through

the house until my 9ad came home and would say$ (4ettle8(. !nd with that I was bac in the imaginary

&hone booth as little Geoffrey J. Chris &layed with the doors and I ran circles through them over and over

until 9ad had enough. It taes children a while to learn how to become embarrassed and I hardly do the4u&erman thing anymore.

Testing the limits

I watched Chris evolved into a courageous man who was driven to do what his brother and sister did and

to find his own inde&endence.

• I saw him ride a bie on his own$ crash it on a fast s&eedy turn$ scra&e his chin and bruise his

body lie a ()ie 9omi :eafer($ to get bac in the saddle to ride again 7 and not be scared8

• *is horse had three wheels and all the ids on the street wanted to try it.



• I saw Chris tae a bus by himself to the sho&&ing mall with a bus transfer to get there. *e left

without &arental a&&roval 7 have you ever disobeyed your &arents;

Chris wanted to test the limits and be his own &erson. *e had more social sills than many fourteen year

olds 7 and the courage of a soldier on 979ay. When ,om noticed he was no longer out on the court I was

directed to ho& in the van and find him 7 more to watch him. I observed many 5C )rans&o buses &ass him

by where he waited at the sto&. *e sat chatting with someone until a non7discriminating bus &iced him

u&. I followed the bus through its route to the )own Centre where Chris transferred to the <= to ride to the

Bayshore ,all >Chris started the trend of hanging out in malls?. *e had no &roblem asing for directionsor getting through obstacles such as curbs he couldn't see or doors that were closed. *e certainly has faith.

I witnessed his survival sills and his desire to e/&lore. *e bummed a cigarette off a stranger and tried out

the smoing scene. *e also called home to let ,om now where he was. When he found out he was

grounded for leaving the court without a&&roval from the fols$ he said$ (Well 7 I'm not coming home till

ten then8( 7 (I'll en2oy it while I can(.

Mr Social

Chris and I are very close as brothers and we have both grown u& (side by each( together. We

synchroni+e in the sense of humour de&artment$ that is for sure. We both can be a little whaced8

Chris gets &eo&le laughing. *e has a gift that is absolutely wonderful to witness and e/&erience andothers have told me the same.

*e also touches &eo&le somewhere inside and he is rarely scared of &eo&le or confrontation. *e is

confident that way. )al about calling it how he sees things ... there is no sugar in his 2ar for coating muchembarrassment. *e nows who he lies and why. *e listens and cares about your feelings. I describe

Chris as (,r. 4ocial(. *e is a character and loves to be &art of the action. *e has a great sense of humour.

*e has taught me a lot about &eo&le and the acce&tance of others no matter who they are. *e is a (leveler(

and what I mean by that is he sees no hierarchy in society. @o one &erson is more im&ortant than another

in social status$ colour$ or ability. *e loos for the (,r. or ,rs. 0ou( in you and he wants to now if you

have a dog$ what its name is and when he can come over to meet it and visit.

!lthough Chris has limited vision$ I thin he sees more in &eo&le than the rest of us. *is lac of vision isa s&ecial gift in a sense 7 &ardon the &un 7 it had to be done >... 5 that rhymed8 I'll sto& that?.

5ne of my favorite stories of Chris that dis&lays how he is a (leveler( is when he met the Governor

General at the :aunch of :ife)ime @etwors 5ttawa$ a charity my mother started five years ago. When

he was introduced to *er A/cellency the ight *onorable !drienne Clarson at a dinner function at her

office$ Chris said$ (I don't thin you have invited me here often for dinner. I thin you should have meover more often(. !drienne Clarson answered by saying (@ot many &eo&le get invited for dinner here

Chris($ and I guess he though that was fair enough 7 he hadn't had her over much either.

Think in solutions

Chris doesn't see himself as (disabled(. I have recently learned he doesn't lie taling about it. If you as

him and &ress him on it$ it is hard for the words to come out. Why focus on that when he is so much more.

When you meet a new &erson for the first time you might store the memory of that &erson in your (@ew

6ersons I *ave ,et older(. I thin many times when &eo&le meet Chris or someone lie him$ by

inherent brain conditioningD they enter him in a sub folder titled (9isability(. I thin Chris would ratherhave you &ut that folder in your mental recycling bin. I have seen this at times when Chris must answer

uestions with ,om and together fill out forms regarding his health for benefits. *e starts off by saying

that he isn't blind and then ,om ass him again and eventually he says he is blind although he follows

that statement u& with a grand (But I can see a little bit8 :ie colors and stuff and I see you there( and he

&oints with his finger targeting your direction.



I have a (list of secrets to success( on my office wall and one of the &oints says$ (Be the most &ositive andenthusiastic &erson you now(. It can be a hard one but when you &ull through$ it feels great. I thin of

Chris and my friend ory when I read it.

!uitable

In Chris's uniue challenges$ I have witnessed him and my family fight for Chris's right to be educated in

the regular school system$ tae a &ublic bus and to be acce&ted in society. )his has &rom&ted me to stand

u& for what I believe in$ voice my o&inions even if they are not &o&ular$ do not com&romise my

&rinci&les$ and stand confident on my own if I believe in something 7 do not bac down if theconseuence is worth the effort.

n the #o

I feel very fortunate to have the athletic able body and the mobility that I do. !s a id$ Chris never

com&lained$ even today 7 as his disability has &rogressed$ he rarely does. Chris is tough as nails. *e has

incredible u&&er body strength 7 shoulders the si+e of basetballs. I have seen him in hundreds of

situations where he is brave$ strong and &uts u& with the &ain. *e has had many surgeries and a few

ambulance rides to the hos&ital. 4o essentially I have learned that I am a wealing ... *a ha8 @o 7 he is

ins&iring to his older brother 7 to hang in there 7 tough it out and get going on the &ath ahead. *e is so

much better at that than me. I am not so good with &hysical &ain. ()he Bud( has will&ower that he must

have got from our 9ad. ,y 9ad uit 1 years of smoing 7 cold turey and e&t a &ac in his front shirt

&ocet 2ust as a reminder that he's never to touch them again. Chris went on his first ever diet and lost %to - &ounds.

Sur$i$al

Chris has taught me to never give u&. If there is something Chris wants to do$ he will mani&ulate the

situation any way he can to get what he wants. *e is strategic 7 watch out 4urvivor8 In those moments heis (,r. Woraround( 7 that taes real creativity and he'll leave you thining in the bo/. *e is smart that

way. If there is a &hysical obstacle to get around lie a flight of stairs to get into his brother's a&artment 7 I

tell you it might as well be his Averest. *e climbs the staircase sweating$ muscles shaing with the lift of

his body u& each stair one leg at a time. *e has determination for things he is interested in. I watch him

and I learn these things.

The %ties that bind%,y &arents have always been great to us$ their ids. )hey have taught us many of life's lessons lie good

&arents do. 5ne thing my sister taught me is how to share and to be more giving of myself and of my

things. Chris has taught me a long list of life's essentials also.

Chris has great em&athy for others$ their difficulties and their feelings. *e is great at discussing those

situations with you and letting you now that he is thining of you in your tough times. *e always offers

to hel&. 5n his own$ he'll send cards$ bring you flowers and visit when you are in the hos&ital. *e has

great insight when it comes to his observation of your emotions. *e understands. *e listens. *e has

taught me that. Chris and I have been brothers since the day he was born and I feel grateful to have him as

my bro. I'm sure I would be a different &erson if I did not now him. *e maes me remember that we are

all &eo&le here on this Aarth and we are all im&ortant to our friends$ family and loved ones 2ust the way

we are.

what my brother taught me

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