UNIT 4: PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPSChapter 9: Parenthood TodayChapter 10: Parents and ChildrearingChapter 11: Parent-Child Issues and Trends

CHAPTER 10: PARENTS AND CHILDREARING Overview

The transition to parenthood Parent-child relationships Parental roles

Parenting styles Family structure and parent-child relationships Parents, work, and child development Parenthood within the larger society

THE TRANSITION TO PARENTHOOD Many social scientists

consider the transition to parenthood to be one of the most significant events in life Some people don’t consider

couples a family until they become parents

Others view becoming parents as the final step to reaching adulthood

There are many adjustments couples have to make, both individually and as a couple, to successfully complete the transition to parenthood

THE TRANSITION TO PARENTHOOD The family life-cycle theory sees the transition to

parenthood as a major normative event An event that occurs naturally in the course of a person’s

life The family unit has several developmental tasks to

complete during the transition Need to adjust and accept a new member into the system The couple must alter their relationship as a couple to

make room for children The couple must make changes in the way they organize

their personal, family, and work routines to fit the new demands for child care

Also need to work through issues related to how they will raise the child, how the child will be cared for, what roles they will play as primary caregivers, and who else will be included in child care

THE TRANSITION TO PARENTHOOD Many couples experience

some decrease in marital satisfaction after the birth of a child

New parents reported that the change that bothered them most was the lack of time They complained of lack of time

for such activities as watching tv, sleeping, communicating with each other, having sex, and even going to the bathroom!

It takes a while to adjust to the additional time required to care for a child

THE TRANSITION TO PARENTHOOD The couple’s financial situation also changes

The addition of a new member of the family brings additional costs Some expenses occur immediately (food, clothing, etc.) Others occur in the near future (daycare) or distant future (university)

During parental leave, employment insurance doesn’t compensate for the entire wage that’s lost Typically only provides 55% of the person's salary

It is often difficult for some couples to make up the income lost during the first few years of a child’s life

THE TRANSITION TO PARENTHOOD Relationships undergo a major change at this stage

of the life cycle The transition to parenthood changes the couple’s

relationship with others in their family Parents become grandparents, and siblings become

aunts and uncles The couple’s new emphasis on family will affect

their relationships with friends as well Some relationships will be slow or resistant to change

One of the parents’ tasks is to work through these changes in the best possible manner for themselves and their child Can be one of the most challenging developmental

tasks of new parents

THE TRANSITION TO PARENTHOOD Relationships will also change if

one member of the couple decides to leave the work force for an extended period of time to provide child care Usually, it is the mother who takes

time out of her career to care for the children

This change in role can be positive or negative Seems to depend on the amount of

care giving provided by the father Situations where the father spent

more time caring for the child had higher martial satisfaction than those in which the father was less involved

THE TRANSITION TO PARENTHOOD Past research on the transition to parenthood

focused on the negative adjustments couples had to make when they became parents

More recent research has looked at the long-term satisfaction of couples After an initial disruption of marital satisfaction, most

couples seem to be happy and enjoy life as parents The best predictor of marital satisfaction during the

transition to parenthood is marital satisfaction before it

The better adjusted couples are prior to becoming parents, the better they are able to cope with the demands of parenthood

PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS A great deal of research

has been done on the attachment relationship between mother and infant

Attachment is the behaviours that represent the need of the infant to attain and maintain proximity and protection with an available and responsible caregiver

PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS Infant attachment to the primary caregiver,

usually the mother, is seen to be essential for normal child development

Erik Erikson saw socialization as a process that lasts a lifetime, beginning at birth and continuing into old age He identified 8 stages of human development, with

each involving a crisis brought on by the changing social situation

During infancy, the crisis faced is trust vs. mistrust Trust is developed when the infant’s needs are met How well the sense of trust is developed depends on

the quality of care the infant receives

PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS Research has focused on infants from 6 months

to 24 months of ago Used observation in the stranger situation to

assess the degree of infants’ psychological and biological attachment to their parents A stranger enters a room where an infant and the

parents are at play The infants’ reaction depends on the the degree

of attachment Securely attached infants head for their mothers

in a stressful situation (such as the entrance of a stranger)

Insecurely attached infants will either avoid or resist their parents in a stressful situation

PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS Attachment research has tended to

focus on the mother-infant bond Has almost completely ignored the

father-infant bond As fathers’ involvement in their

children’s lives became more apparent, the research has shifted

Studies found that fathers of secure infants were: More extroverted and agreeable Had higher levels of self esteem Had more positive marriages Had positive work and family boundaries Had work demands that didn't override

family commitments

PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS Recent research on attachment has focused on

the stability of attachment over time and how secure attachment affects social adaptation later in life Secure attachments are much more stable than

insecure ones Adults who had secure attachments are better

adjusted socially later in life Children who don’t have a secure attachment

may remain socially and emotionally underdeveloped into adulthood May have difficulty with trust, empathy, self-esteem,

and successful relationships for the rest of their lives

PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS Brain development research

has shown a connection between good parenting and optimal brain development

Children who receive language stimulation from their parents develop better language skills than those who do not

The emotional development of children during the first 6 years of life is dependent on strong parenting skills

PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS In the Early Years report, researchers emphasize the

importance of parental support in early learning New evidence on brain development supports what “good

mothering” has done for centuries: “Babies and young children need good nutrition, stimulation,

love, and responsive care” “mothering” is an inclusive term, as they believe that both

parents have a critical role to play in the optimal development of their children

PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS Children who don’t receive proper stimulation

during the early years may suffer from a deficit that is difficult to make up later in life

However, later intervention with good parenting skills can help improve the lives of all children There is not a “window of opportunity” that once

shut, is closed forever It’s important to remember that good parenting

needs to continue throughout children's lives to make a significant impact on their overall development Children who have had a difficult start in life are not

doomed forever, and good parenting can improve their circumstances later in life

PARENTAL ROLES In the past, the role of the parent

was different from what it is today Parents of the past relied on firm

disciplinary practices (often corporal punishment) and unquestioning obedience from their children due to the difficult times in which they lived

Today, parents use more democratic strategies including rational control, strong communication between parent and child, and high levels of affection in their parenting

PARENTAL ROLES Socializing children is one of the most

important tasks parents have The process of learning one’s culture and

acquiring one’s personality and personal values throughout life

There are 3 important aspects of socialization: How it affects the attitudes and behaviour of the

individual being socialized to social institutions and cultural norms

How the people who are doing the socialization affect the individual

The way in which the socialization takes place. In most societies, it is the function of the family.

PARENTAL ROLES Socialization is an ongoing process that

continues from birth to old age It does not end after childhood Parents socialize their children by influencing and

shaping their behaviour, and children socialize their parents in a similar manner

There are 2 preconditions for socialization: The child must have the physical capacity to learn The child lives in a society that has values, norms,

statuses, role, institutions, and a variety of social structures

If a child is missing any of these preconditions, then socialization is not possible

PARENTAL ROLES In every culture in the

world, women are the primary caregivers to children For many, parenting and

mothering are one and the same

But as more and more North American women stay in the work force after the birth of their children, they are no longer at home to be the sole caregiver

PARENTAL ROLES As the mother’s role changed, so has the father’s In the past, especially the 1950s and 1960s, the

father’s roles were that of breadwinner and head of the household

Today, couples have a more equal role to play in the family, and the head of the household is both parents

In a poll of Canadians in which they were asked if they agreed with the statement “The father of the family must be the master of his own house”… 42% agreed in 1983 26% agreed in 1992 5% agreed in 2000 Results were consistent across gender, age groups, marital

status, size of community lived in, and the region of the country

PARENTAL ROLES Changing ways of life in North

America have changed fathers’ involvement with their children Most participate in prenatal classes

with their wives and are present for the birth of their children

Most divorced fathers now have joint or sole custody of their children

However, parental roles still follow more traditional gender roles Fathers tend to do the more skilled

jobs, like playing with and educating their children

Mothers tend to do the less skilled jobs, like laundry, dishes, and feeding their children

PARENTAL ROLES Reasons for fathers’ more traditional roles in the

family include the fact that male and female roles are not considered to be interchangeable Society sees the mother as the principal parent

responsible for the family’s care Men often wait to be asked to help

PARENTAL ROLES Research focused on

single-parent families headed by females has given the impression that, in many families, there is no father figure This has been shown to be

untrue There is a father present in

78% of Canadian families Many Canadian children

benefit from the involvement of their fathers in their lives

PARENTAL ROLES Being close to their father can impact a

child’s: Happiness Life satisfaction Psychological well-being Intellectual development Educational and occupational success

Children with absent fathers have: Lower levels of academic achievement Are more likely to be delinquent or deviant Are more likely to drop out of school

PARENTAL ROLES Fathers and mother interact

differently with their children Fathers tend to be more

physically engaged and less emotional with their children

Play with fathers involves teamwork and games, with fathers stressing healthy competition, risk taking, and independence

This type of play helps children develop the ability to manage their emotions and to improve their intelligence and academic achievement

PARENTAL ROLES People are reconstructing the social image of

fatherhood Many fathers today understand that “a family

is a mother and father working together as a team” More focus on family and children, rather than

focusing entirely on career Some of this change comes from necessity

Most women with young children are now working and fathers have to spend more time parenting than before

PARENTAL ROLES Many authors argue that Canadian society

needs to change the ways that fathers are treated in order to better reflect fathers’ views of themselves as parents

Society is more accommodating of mothers than it is of fathers We maintain a culture of jokes that show fathers as

incompetent parents Many families find that the wife’s workplace is more

accommodating of the responsibilities that come with parenting than the husband’s workplace

Canadian society needs to offer more support to men who become more involved in parenting

PARENTAL ROLES Parents are the main agents of socialization for

their children’s gender roles Babies are socialized from the moment they

enter this world to be masculine or feminine Children see definitions of what it means to be

male or female all around them In books, on tv, in their neighbourhoods, and in their

own families

PARENTAL ROLES Children view the tasks performed by their

parents in the home and come to gender-based conclusions about who should perform which jobs

Parents encourage certain sex-role stereotyped behaviour through something as simple as: Buying toys Disciplining their children Responding to them when they are sick

PARENTING STYLES Families develop a shared view of the world,

and this shared view has an impact on parent-child relationships

Shared views consist of assumptions that families hold on the following: How the world inside and outside of family

boundaries is organized How members relate to one another How the family treats the environment

surrounding them

PARENTING STYLES Shared views provide a sense of meaning

and order for families, establishing a rationale for many of their functions, such as setting goals, making decisions, governing behaviour, and managing their resources

Views change over time as outside forces come to influence the family’s thinking Factors such as education, differing social or

work experiences, or a family crisis can change a family’ shared view

PARENTING STYLES The commonly held views of the family have

a direct impact on parenting and parent-child relationships

Parents who value career and work success highly will place a different value on family time and time with their individual children than those who place less value on work success May have a difficult time putting their personal

needs on hold to care for family members May not take the time to parent in a democratic

and nurturing manner May use punishment or coercion to get their

children to behave

PARENTING STYLES Parents who spend a

great deal of time with their children get to know them better and becomes more sensitive to their needs

Children who spend a great deal of time with their parents may also become more sensitive to their parents’ needs

PARENTING STYLES There are 3 basic styles of parenting: Authoritative

Characterized by warmth, support, acceptance, and indirect positive control of the children

Authoritarian Characterized by more parental control and use

of punishment Permissive

Characterized by few rules and by the children controlling family situations

PARENTING STYLES Children raised by authoritative parents…

Are better adjusted psychologically and have a better self-concept

Children raised by authoritarian parents… Feel rejected by their parents Tend to have more problems with psychological

adjustment Children raised by permissive parents who offer

warmth and encouragement… Are more irresponsible, impulsive, and immature

Children raised by permissive parents who are hostile or rejecting… Are more flighty, anxious, and emotionally

impoverished

PARENTING STYLES Optimum parenting provides a balance

between over-control and permissiveness Factors that inhibit parents from performing

authoritative parenting are: Economic hardship Marital behaviour Conflict between spouses regarding parenting

style Maternal antisocial behaviour Neighbourhood poverty

Using positive parenting techniques despite these risk factors can, however, reduce the impact of the risk factors

FAMILY STRUCTURE AND PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS Over 30 years ago, family structure was fairly

consistent across Canada Most families were intact, meaning both parents

were in their first marriage and they had biological or adopted children

Most single-parent families existed because of the death of a spouse

Family breakdowns did occur, but they were not as widespread as they are today

FAMILY STRUCTURE AND PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS In the past, over 90% of children were born

into a two-parent family Now, for several reasons, an increasing

number of children are born to single parents Children are also living in lone-parent

families at younger and younger ages In the 1960s, 25% of children were living in lone-

parent families by the age of 20 In the 1980s, this changed to 22% living in lone-

parent families by the age of 6 In the 1990s, 37% were living in lone-parent

families by the age of 4

FAMILY STRUCTURE AND PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS Previous research indicated that divorced

fathers saw their children infrequently, and their contact with them decreased over time

More recent research suggests that divorced fathers maintain frequent contact with their children

More recent research has also shown that more fathers of children born to single mothers are acknowledging their paternity by putting their name on the birth certificate

FAMILY STRUCTURE AND PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS The dynamics of a couple’s relationship has

an impact on their children’s development When a child is old enough to understand

intense marital conflict that is child-related and is not resolved in a constructive manner… There are direct negative effects on the child

Children who are exposed to conflict that’s resolved in a constructive, non-aggressive, and productive manner… Don’t suffer the same negative effects

FAMILY STRUCTURE AND PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS Couples who engage in constructive

conflicts may be able to parent better They are able to solve problems as a couple Provide good role models for their children

Couples who engage in destructive conflict with each other are more likely to use this method of solving conflicts with their children Can have long-lasting negative effects on

children May experience more tension in parent-child

relationships May reject their children and be hostile or

physically abusive toward them

PARENTS, WORK, AND CHILD DEVELOPMENT Most mothers of young children in Canada

today work at least part-time In the 1950s, only 8% of mothers went back to

work within 2 years of the birth of a child In the 1990s, that figure had increased to 57%

In Canada, these is a nationally funded maternity- and parental-leave system that allows parents access to employment insurance to support staying home to care for their infants At the end of the leave, 45-50% of women return

to work, while others are more likely to return at the end of 2 years

PARENTS, WORK, AND CHILD DEVELOPMENT Approximately 7-8% of people work from

home More prevalent among families with young

children (14.8%) The increase in home-based work has been

linked to the use of computers and related technologies

PARENTS, WORK, AND CHILD DEVELOPMENT There are clear advantages to working from

home, especially for families with young children: Different child-care arrangements Less time spent commuting More time with children More flexibility

But there are also disadvantages: Decreased social network Isolation from colleagues Interrupted work Inconsistent hours

PARENTS, WORK, AND CHILD DEVELOPMENT Working full-time or part-time has an impact on

the parents’ level of satisfaction concerning the amount of time they get to spend on their children Mothers who worked 20 hours per week were more

satisfied than those who worked more There are many ways that the parents’ work

situation can affect the parent-child relationship Parents who work in stressful environments may

bring that tension home with them Parents who work in situations where they see

children at risk (ex: police officers) may become more protective of their children

PARENTS, WORK, AND CHILD DEVELOPMENT Family time is an essential part of the optimal

development of a child But Canadian families are facing a time crunch Parents are having a hard time balancing work

and family demands Statistics show that today’s parents spend

less time with their children than any family surveyed in Statistics Canada since the survey began 60 years ago

PARENTS, WORK, AND CHILD DEVELOPMENT Parents who have little

free time devote less time to parenting their children They can’t provide as

much sensitive nurturing, intellectual stimulation, and consistent discipline to enable their children to reach their full potential

PARENTHOOD WITHIN THE LARGER SOCIETY The parent-child relationship exists within a

larger society with many outside influences including: Neighborhood and community Extended family and ethnic background Work situations Social networks Socio-economic status

Each of these factors provides a different influence on the relationship between parent and child

PARENTHOOD WITHIN THE LARGER SOCIETY Significant others are the people who make an

important contribution to the developing child’s life For infants and young children, parents are the

most significant others Individuals who come to be important are:

Siblings Aunts and uncles Grandparents Peers Teachers Athletes Celebrities Etc…

PARENTHOOD WITHIN THE LARGER SOCIETY Significant others affect children by what

they do and say, and the manner in which they do and say it

Influence developing children and their view of their future role in life Become children’s role models

PARENTHOOD WITHIN THE LARGER SOCIETY Reference groups are groups of people

with whom one identifies Children may see themselves as a member of a

team or club These reference groups act as standards

against which the child measures him/herself For most adolescents, peer groups become

the main reference group in their lives

PARENTHOOD WITHIN THE LARGER SOCIETY Socio-economic status has an impact in

many ways The higher the socio-economic status of the

family, the more control they have over many other influences in their lives Can choose to live in safer communities Can provide activities for their children

Parents who live in safer communities give their children more freedom, while those in unsafe communities may place more restrictions on their children

PARENTHOOD WITHIN THE LARGER SOCIETY Many recent immigrants experience conflict

between parenting styles and values in the system of the country they have left and those in Canada

Children tend to take on the values of a new country sooner than adult do Can be a source of conflict between parents and

children The greater the difference between cultures,

the more impact this will have on the family system and relationships between parents and children

PARENTHOOD WITHIN THE LARGER SOCIETY The parents’ social network also influences

their parenting Parents tend to spend time with other

parents to share common interests and concerns They can gain insights into parenting by viewing

other parents with their children and incorporate new techniques into their own parenting

When parents spend time with childless people, it has a different type of influence They may come to resent the time demands and

lack of freedom in caring for a young child

CARE OF CHILDREN BY OTHERS There has been a lot of research on the effects

of non-parental care on young children The quality of the parent-child relationship is the

key factor in determining the effects of non-parental care on child development Children who had a poor relationship with their

parents and spent substantial amount of non-parental caregivers were: More likely to develop insecure attachments with their

mothers More likely to develop heightened aggressiveness and non-

compliance during their preschool and early school years Children with a good relationship with their parents

did not suffer these ill effects

CARE OF CHILDREN BY OTHERS Most families don’t use public day-care

centers to tend their children Most use sitters, licensed in-home child care, or

relatives Grandparents are the most commonly used

relative, followed by aunts and uncles Parents who seek child care from their

relatives usually do so out of economic necessity When the cost of child care becomes too great,

they seek other forms of care

CARE OF CHILDREN BY OTHERS Day-care centers are used by 8% of families Licensed day-cares must have:

Trained staff Low staff-child ratios Flexible hours High-quality facilities Low turnover rates Parental involvement

Advocates claim that licensed day care must be available and accessible for all families Called universal day care

CARE OF CHILDREN BY OTHERS In Canada, there are not enough licensed

day-care spaces available As a nation, Canada needs to provide a

variety of child care situations for working parents to ensure that children have good-quality care, no matter what the parents’ work situation is

Providing effective support for parents has been shown in the research to also improve children’s chances for a successful future