Fashion by Bryan Osburn

Longetivity

Today’s wedding dress for today’s woman

Planning your wedding

Rocky Marriages

Gatz Optimization

SCmagazine

We are the World. are you ready for change ?

August Issue

LONGEVITY IN A MARRIAGE PG 4 - 6

DINING AT PACIUGO PG 9

PLANNING YOUR WEDDING PG 10 - 13

OPTIMIZE YOUR SOCIAL NETWORK PG 16 - 17

ROAD TO A ROCKY MARRIAGE PG 18 - 21

Table of Contents

Business Consulting * Business Startups * Process Efficency * Marketing *Social Media Management

http://fullcirclebusinessconsulting.com/

LONGEVITY IN THE MARRIAGE:

WHAT DOES IT TAKE?

I am thankful for the honor and opportunity to present this article. First I must somewhat intro-duce myself. I have been married for 26 years. An unusual amount of time considering the bar-rage of insults marriages endure in multimedia. Considering the divorce rate has been stated to be nearly 50%, (Divorce rate.org) this article cannot be duplicated enough.

INTRODUCTION

I asked several relatives, friends and acquaintances, who have been in marriages as long as or longer than I (25 years or more): “What does it take to stay married through the years. I already had in mind what would be said and was not surprised that love was not high on the list for most individuals. This article shows that the hokey reasons for marriage demonstrated by media, movie stars and fairy tales are really not true and don’t happen to you. This article reflects thoughts and inquiry expressed over the weeks of July 23rd through August 7th. These components are not meant to be placed in any specific order. More importantly is that these components of a successful marriage exist.

TENACITY

The first word that comes to mind when I think of this title is tenacity. Stick to it nests! When one says the words “I do”, what do they really mean? I do until something goes array. I do in case something better comes along? I do until I can find someone with more money? Tenacity in the marriage means that the persons involved make a conscious decision to stand by each other no matter what happens and that both parties buy into the thought that they will not forsake each other: In any way. Tenacity means that the pair is willing to endure the pinnacle and pitfalls of the relationship as they ride the tornadoes and sunshine of the relationship. The couple is will-ing to forgive themselves and their partner of the misgivings as well as applaud them for their virtues.

RESPECT

Reverence for the other human in the relationship is a must. This means you are committed to each other. When you experience time with the individual, the mindset is that moving forward in life with that individual is an expectation and a privilege between both parties. This type of respect does not depend on any monetary or status association. The parties have decided that this is so and freely and openly abide by this expectation.

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COOPERATION

Decision-making is developed through a partnership. Relegation of responsibilities in the rela-tionship is a usual challenge. However one way the partnership survives is how responsibilities are completed through collaboration. One party may feel that they are being put upon in the relationship if this area lacks balance. The mindset that couples are in it together so that the labor required to keep both parties happy is accomplished.

COMMITMENT

This is where most relationships can go array. What is meant when we say commitment? Sometimes it is different for men than for women depending on their frame of reference. How-ever in a cohesive relationship, the same should apply for both. Commitment should mean that both parties have decided to remain free of other relationships that are in direct conflict with the marriage relationship. In other words, they will not engage in emotional, social, sexual and or financial relationships that can be misconstrued as an adulterous affair.

conflict with the marriage relationship. In other words, they will not engage in emotional, social, sexual and or financial relationships that can be misconstrued as an adulterous affair.

UNDERSTANDING

When one states that they understand an individual, they are saying that they appreciate and recognize the position for which they stand on matters concerning emotion, temperament, dis-position, and the intent of an individual for the reasons they take or resign not to take action on issues.

PRAYER

Prayer is an ongoing requirement of the marriage situation. Prayer seems to assist in the man-ageability factor of relationships. Of course during the course of the relationship individuals are going to experience the rocky roads. Prayer seems to make the bumps less bumpy.

DEVOTION

When one is devoted in a relationship they are committed to the other person as they are com-mitted to themselves. And yes, God is at the center of this commitment. The shortcomings that everyone has are over looked or at least have a grace period. Devotion means that the short-coming s will be overlooked and or worked through over and again. This does not mean you won’t be annoyed by the short comings, however in the grand scheme of things; they won’t mat-ter enough for you to end or screw up the relationship. Here is a caveat: Infidelity, selfishness, cruelty, brutality, untrustworthiness and any behaviors within this realm, are not amongst the list of shortcomings that can be over looked… For those considering it, well, hum… How about no!

TRUST

Honesty is one of the key ingredients of a relationship. Trust means you can be assured that given any attempts from the outside, your mate will always choose the relationship with you

over the temptations of others. If untrustworthiness is an issue, than the relationship is in jeop-ardy of failure; therefore, trust must be maintained throughout the relationship… period.

NERVES

This was one of those areas; I did not come up with myself. This thought belongs to my mom, who has been married to my dad for almost 60 years. The explanation may go something like this. Even though some of what your spouse does may get on your last nerve, you maintain the relationship because the good of the relationship supersedes the fact that sometimes just their presence gets on your nerves.

LOVE

Need this area really be explained in any type of detail? Not writing just about the feeling of hot intense desire, but the genuine love that two people share. Love that allows one to overlook shortcomings and experience the joy of living life with your mate represents true love.

HOHOR

There is always something to say about honoring your mate. This honor can be done in many forms. Dictionary definitions include decency, integrity, righteousness, principal, morality.

BY DOROTHY STRAUGHTER

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Designed by BeatriceDavisMade by Bernie Martin

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Dining at Paciugo

Interviewing Beatrice Davis

- The diva of networking, management, and creating a vibe

- Tasting the flavors of the authentic Italian Gelato Experience.

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•PLANNING YOUR WEDDING

Throughout this article plans to contain costs of the wedding will be introduced. Although lav-ish weddings are being touted in the media and magazines, you can byte (double entendra intended) the budget and still have a fabulous and elegant event. Choosing a wedding planner can help you trudge through the planning process especially if you want nothing to do with the logistics. This article will allow you as the planner or your designated planner to get through the process with a little help from me. A caveat emptor is that you don’t have to take my word for it. These are merely suggestions that helped me get through the grind of planning a wedding and hopefully they may help you. These items don’t have to be taken en any one order.

SETTING THE DATESetting the date can be as easy as just randomly picking a date that both individuals agree or as complicated as talking with relatives and scheduling around vacations and Aunt Susie’s heart surgery. At any rate, it is good to set it at about year from the time you get engaged. This pro-vides enough time for the dress to be ordered/made and completed, take care of clergical issues if they apply, and enough time for your intended guests to plan around your event instead of the reverse.

DEVELOPING YOUR TIMELINEOnce the date has been set, find a calendar, datebook, and or computer program that suit your taste and one you can live with for one year. At the time I planned mine, computer programs did not exist therefore, I used a physical calendar with enough space to write in what was to happen for each day, including appointments that related to the wedding. I also included the day to day schedule as well so that I wouldn’t become so involved in the wedding planning that I lost sight of the life I was living.

TALK TO YOUR PARENTSNot sure this one has come to mind for most couples; however this can save a lot of time and ef-fort in the end and as well may provide a little financial assistance along the way. Never assume that parents will handle the bill. Even if it is a family tradition, allow the parents who will pay the opportunity to offer you the privilege. Define how much they may provide from zero to the taking care of the entire event; alcohol and all. Parents may also have ideas on how and or where the event should take place. Even though you have it in your mind as to how the wedding planning should go forth, please listen to your parents, at least humor them. Incorporate at least one of their ideas. This may be the beginning of a long and peaceful coexistence between families. HOWEVER, If you know that your parents will run amuck with the planning and things will get out of hand because of issues that are yet unresolved, avoid the hassle altogether. Once again, talking to them and letting them know that you are taking this ride alone and if they wish you can keep them abreast of your plans.

INVITATIONSThe choice to use a professional invitation specialist or sift through the available paper choices and or decide to evite your guests may be based on the following rationale: If you evite your guests the evites may have to be revolving as a weekly reminder to help reduce the variables of people not reading their emails enough and evites getting lost in cyberspace. If you choose the paper method the more mature in age guests may be happy that they have a physical piece of paper to remind them. I suggest using a combination of face book, evite, and paper invitations to guarantee responses and to allow for varied types of ways for people to respond.ntended) the budget and still have a fabulous and elegant event. Choosing a wedding planner

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FINDING THE DRESS

Looking for the dress is the first rude awakening of the planning process. Not saying that the men don’t have any issues with their tux, however, It seems that men’s cloth-ing in general are more forgiving of the extra pounds one may endure through the nat-ural stresses of life. Women’s clothing on the other hand is another beast of its own kind. First; note the size of the dress versus the size that you have become. Usually there is no match. For example: At the time I was planning my wedding. I weighed 127 pounds. In regular clothing, this was a size six or eight give or take the type of designer and how the item was made. The wedding gowns were fit to even smaller body types, however they stated I must order a size 12, which still needed adjustment as the stresses of the wedding planning required adjustments along the way, at a cost of course to me. Now, with that being said, If you are a BBB (big beautiful bride), and they tell you the sizes only go to a certain number, usually size 20. They state they may have to gusset your dress: this means they will put panels on the side. Now, if your dress has to be gusseted, and you have bead work that must be replicated, there is even more of a cost involved, and again…it’s on you. Now if you lose weight un-der stress, and have beading on your dress and it has to be taken more than usual, again…the cost is again, on you.

SECURING THE VENUE

CLERGY CHURCH

If you are having a cathedral wedding there is a type of veil called cathedral length. It is long and goes past the train of the dress. This is couture style. I’m just saying. Of course you don’t have to stick to tradition; you can create your own. For example, instead of only having the father walk the bride down the aisle, why not have mom and dad walk the bride down the aisle? Both parties were in on the creation of the bride. Selecting a minister can bring a host of events to the table. Some denominations require that premarital counseling occur. Remember the planning should start a year in advance. Premarital counseling may last from a few weeks to a few months, and afterwards, some clergy may decide that you and your mate don’t seem to be a match. Under premarital counseling, you may find the red flags that can cause for a rocky road to a failed marriage. In that case heed the warning signs presented in the article “Road to a rocky marriage”.

RECEPTION SITE

Securing the room this is where lots of planning occurs. First, one must think of the type of atmosphere and style they want to portray (Elegant sophisticated or roman-tic etc.). Second, what theme do you want to captivate (Country western, midlevel or ultra-modern etc.)? Third, one must consider how much they want to budget for the event. Fourth, the place you wish to choose to hold the event. Before choosing the place for the wedding and reception, the challenge is to find the right place and if the staff there is willing and able to meet your accommodations. Have a meeting with the designated administrator so that you can secure a location for the wedding itself and taste the food to see if the same location will suit your needs. A tip on finding that right place is first to think out of the box. Look for a place that already has the theme you are seeking as part of the décor, then you can incorporate your extra touches to finish it off.

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Designed by Bryan Osburn“French Vanilla”

Photography by Casmier Tyler

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Another tip is to find a place that is of your choosing, beautiful and not well known. Usually newly built hotels are eager to please and may provide a discount if it sounds like your party can place them on the map to attract other customers. Emphasis on the classy and sophisticated is required here. Minimal is the key to keeping costs down. For example; placing one large absolutely beautiful flower on the table in a simple vase with a sachet of the color of your choosing can be both elegant and low cost.

GLORIOUS FOOD

Food… I just wanted to linger on that word. The type of food you choose can de-termine how guest feel when they leave your event. With the correct type of venue chosen tasting the food before the choice is finalized is a must. However this is the area of the most significant cost. Sometimes it is prudent to have select orderves which can also be done in an elegant and tasteful format. The type of food served can match the theme or just be tastefully done enough to satisfy the most finicky of tastes. When selecting the food choice it may be wise to assess the financing of the cost of each item so that your budget is not compromised. Be clear on which food items are included in the total cost to that if you are selecting a la carte or a total se-lection.

ESSENTIALS

PHOTOGRAPHERS VIDEOGRPHERS

Photographs and videos have come a long way thanks to photo shop, movie maker, you tube, the internet and face book so for visual media; the sky really is the limit. If you know a photographer, digital pictures allow for much manipulation at the cost of the time and the extent to which you are willing to fund. I found a photographer friend who did it for the cost of the film and now that thumb drives are available you can take thousands of pictures depending on the size of the thumb drive.

FLOWERS

Bridal flowers are another expense that can be costly; however, if you go, and I must say again simple and elegant, costs can be contained. One flower of your choosing is a good start and the same theme of flowers can be used to decorate the table and as well for the brides maids. Bridal tulle (veil fabric) is another cost effective way to add mystery and ambience to the wedding décor. It does not have to be fancy, just drape it over whatever surface and you have couture.

THE CAKE

If you can’t find a friend attempt to find a new and upcoming bakery that is look-ing for a way into the market and have to prove that their product is market worthy. Of course you must taste the cake first to decide if this is the way for you. There is always the chain bakery or those who are established who will make the type of cake you want, but beware of the taste, because some cakes that look good may not always taste good. Here again I used a friend who was taking a beginning cake making class and wanted to practice on me. The cake not only turned out beautiful but it was able to feed more than the 300 guests invited and the top of the cake was wonderful the next year.

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Joy & Happiness

Congratulations Andre & Ponisha Longstreet

Photography byCasmier Tyler

OPTIMIZE YOUR SOCIAL NETWORK

Casmier Tyler’s interview with Whitney Hewitt

1) People aren’t having the best of luck when it comes down to social media, as a strategist, how would Gatz Optimize motivate individuals and businesses about sticking with the social networking spirit?

Social media success isn’t going to happen over night. Like all good marketing initia-tives, it takes work and creativity to make your brand a hit. Gatz Optimize (www.GatzOptimize.com) advises our clients to track the number of times they post, number of followers and client interaction (comments, followers, RETWEETs) for the first 4 weeks of their social media campaigns. During weeks 5 – 8, increase the number of times you post, switch up some of your content and reply to clients, tracking the same statistics. During this time try offering a promotion through Twitter, create a poll on your Facebook Page or run a contest on LinkedIn to increase followers. Do this for 12 weeks and at the end of the three months, you will be able to see what worked for your busi-ness and what didn’t. Apply what you have learned to your future social media marketing tactics.

2) For blogging purpose, is it easy to use word press or the blogger itself? Which one is best?

There are quite a few blogging platforms available. WORDPRESS (used by Gatz Opti-mize), Blogger, Tumblr and TypePad are among the most popular. Each of these plat-forms is different so before you start blogging, it’s best to figure out your audience, your focus and your specific goals. From there, take a look at the different options to decide which platform best suites your needs.

3) How long has Gatz Optimize been doing social media?

Gatz Optimize was created in 2010, when we realized that small businesses were strug-gling to keep up with their competitors in the social media space. Social media has taken off and continues to grow and businesses that aren’t participating will get left behind. Most businesses do not have the resources to create a full-time social media marketing position within their company and that’s where Gatz Optimize comes in. We offer tailored solutions to meet specific social media needs – from basic on-site training sessions with a current employee to creation and full-time management of social media networks.

4) There are companies who still haven’t updated their network, how would Gatz Optimize handle such clients when they want to be a part of the social media climate? Would you point them into another direction, assist in the problem, or give them many strategic antidotes?

It’s never too late to create a social media presence. Companies should treat social media as they would their other marketing tactics, and make it a high priority. I would recommend concentrating on the largest social networks first – Facebook & Twitter. With over 750 million users on Facebook and 200 million Twitter accounts, these are the networks that will give you the fastest results.

5) Some of these questions may seem crazy, but most people want to understand the meaning behind Gatz Optimize. I’ve ran across many who don’t get the power of social media in their own town.

Social media is a powerful and free way to market and interact with customers. Leverag-ing the power of social media, companies are able to see what their customers are saying about their brand, personally react to comments or concerns and monitor their competition. There is no other marketing tool that allows companies to promote their business to target-ed potential customers, offer promotions and incentives and raise awareness of important events, all at no cost. Businesses in all industries all over the world are quickly becoming more social.

6) I have never had success on twitter; are their steps I need to know to get or gain people into network? I don’t understand the concept of the symbols: @ #. Everyone wants more Twitter followers but unless you’re Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber, you’re going to have to work at increasing your Twitter influence. It’s not enough to visit Twitter once or twice a week - the people with the most followers are tweeting multiple times per day. Including keywords in your Twitter bio and in your tweets makes it easier for people to find you based on a specific interest. You can use Twitter Search to find people talking about things that interest you, and follow them. Respond to other people using the @reply method so they see your interaction. Pictures and useful information are heavily spread around on Twitter so include interesting photos and links in your tweets. Promote your Twitter URL by adding it to your email signature, Facebook page, LinkedIn profile, etc. Don’t know the difference between a handle and a hash-tag? Twitter lingo can be hard to understand if you’re new to the site. Here is a Twitter dictionary that will have you tweeting like a pro in no time: http://goo.gl/0C1Gf

7) I know content is the most important tool that most people need to under-stand. What can you tell the people who don’t know- what type of content that is needed? What are the captivating subjects that people want to hear? We know about the topics: money, finance, how to make more money, love, and happiness…what are others?

When deciding to write a blog, your content should be something that interests you and that you know a good deal about. It is important to identify who you are writing for, and keep that audience in mind when creating posts. You’ve only got a few seconds to grab someone’s attention so be clear and distinct when creating blog post titles. The ideal blog post length is between 100 and 300 words. Be sure to include plenty of white space so your reader’s eyes don’t get tired and intriguing pictures to liven up the post.

8) What makes your company stand out more than the next?

Gatz Optimize is different than other consulting firms in that our social media solutions are specifically tailored to each business’s unique needs. We spend time working with the business to understand their objectives, strategies, and goals. Being realistic about the amount of time and resources - a business has to commit to social media and it is impera-tive when creating a social media plan of attack. There is no one-size-fits-all solution at Gatz Optimize.

9) Why SCmagazine? Gatz Optimize appreciates the emphasis SCmagazine puts on entrepreneurs and is ex-cited about contributing to the magazine to provide useful information to its readers.

THE ROAD TO A ROCKY MARRIAGE

I N F I D E L I T Y

Infidelity is serious betrayal of trust. Neither spouse wants to know that their mate is lying down with, emotionally tied to, financially involved with, or personally committed to an in-dividual outside of the marital relationship. It is emotionally painful, distressing, sad and a deplorable act against a mate. We don’t need to go into the deep detail of why people do it. However, I feel that most people avoid the real reason people are unfaithful. I think that the real reason people are unfaithful is because they think they can get away with it. They really think that they are so savvy and do it so well that they will never be caught. Ways you can tell that your mate is cheating is that they want desire and or demand control. They get upset for menial reasons, they are jealous, and they create avenues to leave the home… alone. They may push your buttons to cause an argument to give them an excuse to leave. Major excuses they give are that children are not wanted; they stay at work for long periods of time when they are not a workaholic. They want more from you even though you are giving your all. Your all never satisfies them. They receive late night calls, and are always tired and attempts to get out of family engagement. They do not want to see you go anywhere without them. And most of all they don’t want you to have friends and will dis-courage new and long term friendships. OK, I could keep going and spend an article/books worth of time on this issue. A friend of mine stated that marriage makes you live longer and it does not matter if you get along all the time. As long as people are different and come from different backgrounds, there will be disagreements in a relationship. Just don’t let the disagreements be a continual source of mal content.

NON COMPLIANCE

Repeated non-compliance is not productive in the relationship. When two people disagree regularly to the point where it cripples the communication network in the relationship, the door opens to relationship calamity. Not saying that there must be 100% agreement in a relationship. 100% is never possible. However, one must, should be willing to hear what another has to say even if there is no agreement and you really don’t want to hear what the person has to say. It is possible listen to what one has to say even if you do not agree. That is the growth and maturity factor in a relationship. For if you are the type of person who can only hear and digest what is pleasant to the ear you are in for a rude awakening in a true and deep relationship especially when children are involved. Children and people do say the darnedest things.

SECRETS

People, society really don’t seem to understand the gravity of the power and I mean de-structive power secrets can have on a relationship. To start, a good relationship has no secrets. Yes I said it! No secrets. If I have to give advice, and I’m not; I would say that when you consider yourself serious especially in a marital relationship, don’t keep any se-crets. Full out honesty is the only way, even if that honesty looks ugly. Ugly honesty helps you communicate what is on your mind. However this must be coupled with the notion that one is mature enough to be ready to hear, not necessarily accept, what will be said after the words, let me be perfectly honest.

LACK OF A DIVISION OF LABOR

Responsibility specifically allocated to one individual because of gender. This European notion that males and females are supposed to do specific tasks has taken down more marriages; however, no one wants to admit it. After centuries of confined job require-ments set by some nebulous entity, it is still not working. How about we do the job we are best at. I must take time to explore the most things that annoys me. Cooking! I do love cooking, not because of my gender; however, I think it is an art. I do notice, that although women usually do most of the cooking in a relationship, a disproportionate number of men get paid to cook rather than women. Hummmm.

DECITFULNESS BETRAYAL

Lying, untrustworthiness, unreliability, disloyalty, betrayal, and deceit; need I say more? These are the makings of a bad relationship that will only get worse. If your mate comes close to any one of these characteristics, RUN. These characteristics alone can bring down any relationship faster than the titanic. Sometimes you need to have open dialogue about what is meant by deceit and what is seen as a deceitful act. You will find that every-one is not of the same opinion on some issues.

RUDENESS

Some people tolerate rude behavior and even make excuses for it. I on the other hand do not. If your mate is rude to you or your friends, they are showing disrespect to you, your friends and themselves. It is unacceptable behavior. The notion that you have to know someone to be nice to them is just plain ignorant. Call me old school if you will. A little politeness goes a long way. I’m not saying that your mate must carry on a conversation with your friends, however, at acknowledge that they are present in the home and at least be cordial.

DISAFFECTIONATE

When one states that they have fallen out of love and becomes disaffectionate towards their mate, the relation may be at a serious decline. The reasons for disaffectionate be-haviors can be many. Usually one or both individuals fall out of love or grow apart. It could be that the reasons they both fell in love in the first place, no longer exist.

It is possible that one individual is no longer interested in the other and wants out. The amount of time it takes for such feelings to emerge is unknown. It could be that the fan-tasy that began the relationship no longer keeps the attention of the other mate.

BRUTALITY

Don’t need to expound that much on this topic. Isn’t it self-explanatory? I don’t just mean physical abuse; psychological and physical abuse can go undetected for years before the victim has had enough. However, Psychological abuse is easier to hide. Others surround-ing the psychologically abused individual are left with constant misunderstandings of the reasons the victim has behaved over the years. Usually the abusive perpetrator has sub-jugated the victim into a state where they feel there is no way out. If you find yourself in this type of relationship, do a self-inventory and ask yourself these questions. “Do I want to continue to live this way?” “What am I telling my children or other children about rela-tionships?” “What is it about me that allow me to remain in and tolerate an abusive situa-tion?” “When is enough, really enough?”

NOTEThis list does not encompass all reasons the road to a rocky marriage can exist. If your marriage has these issues, over time break is more likely. The inevitability depends on how willing the couple is to address the issues and salvage the relationship. Be advised that these may be considered as warning signs in which one should be aware. The ca-veat emptor here is that you don’t have to use information from a magazine writer, do your own research from your friends and the sources available and form your own opinions. I just happen to be fortunate enough to tell you mine. Thank you

by Dorothy Straughter

Many thanks to Beatrice Davis for the invite.Photography by Casmier Tyler

SCmagazine

Designer of the “French Vanilla” Collection

Bryan Osburn