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THE SKELETON PROJECT: READ www.skeletonproject.co.uk : [email protected]

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you hold in your hands the culmination of two minds who at least partly believe all that stuff, and have attempted to create art and ideas from that basis. Further to this, they write. A LOT! And have collated numerous sprays, bursts and shudders of written work from their two separate monkey-minds to create a creepy and eccentric hybrid third. This third mind has no real agenda save to be heard and have itself explained. This book isn’t really a book. It’s a journal or ideas, forgotten memories, unusable fragments, sounds and of secret links to YouTube.

TRANSCRIPT

Page 1: Read: A Skeleton Project

THE SKELETON PROJECT:

READ

www.skeletonproject.co.uk : [email protected]

Page 2: Read: A Skeleton Project

Prequel: The bit we put on everything:

What We Do:

The Skeleton Project specialises in theatre and

performance, with seven productions written and

performed since 2005, though in recent years have

branched out into other media.

“There’s stuff we can do onstage and not onscreen,

and vice versa. So we made a film version of [first

production] I.T.C.H. The same goes for music and

art. There are things that we can say which suit

other media more than theatre.”

Who We Are:

The Skeleton Project is a West Yorkshire-based

theatre and performance group, active since

2005. Graduates of Leeds Metropolitan

University, founding members Matthew Allen

and Anton Krasauskas have in that time written

and toured original and exciting work,

alongside their continuing efforts to showcase

and develop the talents of other local artists

and performers.

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Recent forays outside of the theatre have culminated in short films such as 'Spread', art

installations and exhibitions in and around Leeds,

as well as a dark musical soundtrack which continues to feature in new productions; a

trademark sound for a trademark production company.

Interested in showcasing new talent, The Skeleton Project created NEWK, a regular platform

for developing work which takes the form of three short previews of work by other artists. It

offers them the opportunity to test material in front of audiences, as well as to gauge

interest in the arts in the region.

It’s an integral part of future Projects, and an excellent way to catch up with what is

becoming a burgeoning scene of artistic talent. The Skeleton Project is supported by

Stage@Leeds, Test Space and West Yorkshire Theatre Network.

The Skeleton Project creates accessible, watchable, humorous work without compromising

the desire to take risks, and creates work on subjects which really capture its imagination.

Wrap Around: Workshops for ages 16 years old and up, pre- and post-performance

discussions for both audiences and professionals, lecture demonstrations for professional

artists and academics. Showcase Events in gallery spaces and festivals.

LOLZ images by Mindy Goose www.mindygoose.co.uk

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Chapter 1: And So It Begins…

First off I thought I’d tell you about ‘us.’ I will take this opportunity to tell you a bit about

what ‘we’ do.

We are The Skeleton Project and when you get right down to it The Skeleton Project is a

anything made together by Anton Krasauskas and Matthew Allen. We are solo artists

working in collaboration. It feels like more than that to us though.

It feels like work.

It feels like fun.

It feels like music.

It feels like something is happening.

So far we have made two albums, a bunk of drawings, a film, a few short films, hosted 4

comedy nights, made 3 sketch shows, abandoned 22 scripts, hosted four new work events, a

few socials, many parties, a gig, written some blogs, written some poems, some paintings,

made 6 errors, taken hundreds of photos, had 3 websites and made 9 shows (3 good ones).

We are now working on two more shows, making music, blogging and generally spreading

ourselves too thin.

Our main ethos in making shows is it has to be something we would want to go see. It has to

be something we’d laugh at. It should to be something that could make us cry. It might be

something we never finish, it’s not something we are doing just for the money, it’s always

something we love (until we get sick of it).

This is not an exercise of ‘look how good we are’ or even close to ‘look how good we think

we are.’

This is simply a marker in time: Reason for this marker will be made clear in a few

paragraphs.

We often worry that we aren’t doing as good as The Jonses. By The Jonses I of course

mean the other collaborations, groups of practitioners and theatre companies.

We try to keep up – but we don’t have the funding (that’s only an excuse.)

We try to make great work – but we don’t have the space (actually we have access

to a lot of space when we need it.)

We try to make good work that we think is good at the time.

I think it’s good to try to do as well as everyone else. It doesn’t really matter if I do or not.

But don’t tell me that, if I knew that I’d stop trying so hard. What matters is that we keep at

it. We are constantly trying to move our own goal posts. A few years ago all we wanted was

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to make a film, once we had done that we realised making another film right after would be

pointless, we’d just done that. We wanted a shiny .co.uk website and once we got one of

those we wanted logos and banners and we kept looking for great music to go in our shows

but when we couldn’t find a fit we just made our own. We’ve been told our work is a bit

weird, but that’s okay, that person wasn’t our intended audience. Sometimes I rant and

digress and go off on a tangent, but again that’s okay, that’s our chosen style. Actually suits

are our chosen style. So we keep changing what we are doing and trying new things, we

aren’t really still looking for a new medium to present our work or a style of work to define

what The Skeleton Project actually does. What we do is just make things. However we still

often worry that we aren’t getting there, where ever there is, possibly where Mr and or Mrs

Jones is right now. Or if we are getting there we often feel like it isn’t fast enough or that we

aren’t making enough money from it. Again it’s not about the money. It would just be a

really, really nice bonus.

With this in mind I’ve been thinking about where our work lies in relation to the field we

work in and promoted by a few conversations with peers I have decided we are working in

that bit on old maps. That bit that wasn’t yet charted and said:

‘Here be dragons.’

I’m in no way says we are cutting edge or making something so new it’s not on the map

yet. We are just not sure where we are going with it. And we’ve just decided that that’s

okay. We have decided that that is what we want to do. Forget the five year plan, fuck that

collaboration agreement, we are making work as often as we can, sitting up all night and

scribbling ideas on the back of our hands and at least for now that excites us enough to keep

us going in a time where it’s increasingly difficult to get funding and bookings. After all the

Skeleton Project may already 6 years old but when I was 6 years old I 6 years old I wanted to

be a fireman. Things change.

Our other worry, our related worry is how to define our self when applying for gigs and

things of that nature. We wrote the about us bit. See the prequel if you skipped by that. I

would have done. It’s not bad. I think we need to just know that that’s enough for now. It’s

only words, we don’t need to stick to it and we can always change it.

So here we are now. And we kind of know where we are going. Sort of. And now it’s not as

scary. So I decided at this point we should make something. We like making things. This is a

maker.

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This is the point in our ‘career’ that we realised its all going alright actually.

This is the point we realised it’s going terrible and that’s okay because there’s time to

change.

This is the point we decided we want to change everything

This is the point we realised it’s okay to learn as we go along.

This is when we decided just to be.

So actually this was the point we realised we aren’t Emerging artists anymore. We are

actually doing it.

Before every theatrical performance I must summon the blood.

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Chapter 2: Here Be Dragons

This book isn’t really a book. It’s a journal or ideas, forgotten memories, unusable

fragments, sounds and of secret links to YouTube. I would recommend that if you are going

to read this from cover to cover, you should download these songs and play them as you

read, watch and look.

Listen To The Skeleton Project:

Welcome From The Start

Open Heart

Leave New York As You Found It

Faster Now

You are The One IronAut

With that in mind, you hold in your hands the culmination of two minds who at least partly believe all that stuff, and have attempted to create art and ideas from that basis. Further to this, they write. A LOT! And have collated numerous sprays, bursts and shudders of written work from their two separate monkey-minds to create a creepy and eccentric hybrid third. This third mind has no real agenda save to be heard and have itself explained. We have been told that the world needs to be given drunken idiocy, foul language and pointless rants about ephemeral concepts like dreams and hope. We hope that within these pages you might find something to inspire you to make something that describes where you are right now. That makes the world a little bit more alive, and opens up that doorway that most people have locked. The door that bears the sign “Stage Door: Artists Only” Here’s a little secret. You decide whether you are allowed past that door or not, not the security, not the manager, not the bouncers, not the other artists. You decide whether you are going to take your world and recreate it as something that will catch the attention, and inspire the heart. It’s no-one else’s decision but yours.

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Chapter 3

Dear Lilly,

Thank you for your interest in The Skeleton Project.

I can’t write the show for you. I think if your tutor found out you’d get kicked out. I don’t

know how she’d find out but I don’t feel comfortable with it.

Here is a bit of an idea that I’m not using in anything… maybe it will help give you

inspiration.

I find that the calmest moments are those after terrible events. I find that clarity can only be

found in silence. I find you crying again. And I ask you what’s wrong. You pause. And right

then there is another moment. Clarity. And it’s painful. Experiencing this, calmness, clarity,

realization, these used to be the small sections of existence that I would yearn for.

When you fill your life with small sections of silence, it can become abundantly clear to

anyone watching that your life is dull. And I don’t want that. This may be the only chance I

get to stamp my signature onto this land. To have people look at me and say ‘Hey, she is an

exciting person. She is interesting. She is the one that I want to know. So I raise my hand

with approval. And smack you down. And when your cheek is stinging and red, that’s the

only section of your existence you will remember until the stinging goes away. There will be

nothing but you, me, and the slap mark on your face. It’s a distraction technique. It’s a way

to achieve that silence I bear on the outside on the inside too. It will achieve a different level

of clarity, that’s what’s important.

If that doesn’t help here are a few suggestions:

Number 1: Stay up all night just typing what comes into your head.

Number 2: Type your favourite words into google & look up alternative definitions.

Number 3: Listen to music

Number 4: Go for a walk

Number 5: Don’t leave the room

Number 6: Narrate your surroundings

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Matt looks nervous and begins the monologue with stutters and repetition, the director stops him

and asks him to start again & if he’d like a script. Matt offers to leave and the director frowns and

lets him try again. Matt explains he usually enters delivering what he has prepared. The director

acknowledges this but when he starts cuts him off and tells him to slow down.

Welcome to my inner sanctums.

A guide for travelers who wish to delve into the catacombs of my psyche.

This is a guide to me.

Not a step by step instruction, nor a demonstration, education or explanation.

This is just me.

A fast mumbling un-constructive deconstruction of my thoughts.

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I did a Bryce: M. Allen

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SCENE SIX: Jamie and Emma sit on opposite sides of the stage with their boxes. Looking through the pictures and letters and remembering things they should have left alone. Lauren and Kat sidle up behind them and take the boxes away from them and put them down in front of them. Then they help them both up and slow dance with them. Jamie and Emma push themselves away and sit down again and go back to their boxes. Lauren and Kat walk towards each other and dance with each other and then walk to the other person. They try the same approach again. Again Emma and Jamie fight and sit back down. Each time they sit down they become more upset. Lauren and Kat walk back to the middle and dance with each other again. Emma and Jamie stand up and slow dance with themselves.

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October 2007

I am interested in working at cineworld because of its good reputation. I am interested in

working at any of the cineworld locations in West Yorkshire but would be willing to travel

further if needed. I am available to work in full or part time employment and can start

immediately.

I have a degree in performance, which has taught me transferable skills such as working in a

team, working very well to deadlines, the ability to lead and working well under any

direction. I am a confident person who takes pride in work.

I am particularly interested in a projectionist role however I would be happy to consider and

role within Cineworld.

I look forward to hearing from you,

Matthew Allen.

(I DIDN’T GET THE JOB)

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Pitch for a new show:

You know that feeling you get when you're sitting in a room full of people and you feel like

there's no-one there that you can connect with? When everyone around you feels

completely different to how you feel. And there's a little tiny doubt in the back of your mind

that makes you terrified to turn to the person sitting next to you and ask them how they

are? The feeling that stops you making friends. The feeling that stops you functioning in the

real world. The feeling that makes you wish you were actually on your own instead of just

on the edge of everyone else's social circle. The feeling that it would be much better to have

no friends than to have casual acquaintances. As though if you were completely alone then

it wouldn't matter, but because there are always people on the periphery making you feel

bad about not being a social butterfly like everyone else? That little ITCH in the centre of

your head? It's lying to you. Making you feel isolated. Everyone has an itch. Since the

beginning of time, there has been an itch. People have just forgotten how to scratch it.

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Page 17: Read: A Skeleton Project

Do you remember your first love?

Do you remember the first time someone reached into your chest

and squeezed your heart dry?

Do you remember feeling like nothing made sense anymore?

Do you remember wishing you could have just one more moment

with them, as a final goodbye?

Do you remember drowning every feeling you had left in bottle after

bottle of wine?

Do you remember...?

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Checking the guest list

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Number 7: List every lie you have ever told

(what do you remember?)

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A: Well, I should be feeling really great. I'm moving along in the world. I'm still on a path,

and it's taking me to good places. But i can't help but feel that i shouldn't be this gutted

about people I’ve only known for two years. It's ridiculous.

B: Yes it is.

A: Or maybe I’ve just got too comfortable. I knew it would eventually go off down like this.

Things change, circumstances change, life changes. And you move on to the next thing. But

the next thing is nowhere near as good as the old thing. It's a pale imitation. A faked version

of what used to fill that massive gap in your life. And what if there’s nothing else to fill that

gap?

B: Then i will fill it for you. I'll give you something to do. I'll keep you busy. You want to

spend hours sitting staring out of a window crying about not being around your friends? I

can do that for you. You want to start drinking again? It can be arranged. You want to go

back to spending the rest of your life talking to people who are only there because there are

flimsy phone connections and electronics keeping them there? Or do you want to move on

with your life?

A: I'd quite like to do both.

B: You don't have that choice. You can either move on, or stay here. You can see what new

stuff is waiting for you up ahead. Or you can mourn the old shit. You can look for something

to make you happy, or stay miserable about how you'll never be as happy as you used to be.

You can waste your time over moments that have been reduced to flashes of reminiscence

and synaptic misfires, or you can forget about them now instead of waiting for your

decaying brain cells to make that choice for you. Do you want to live in the future or the

past? Do you want to be happy or sad? Do you want to live or die?

A: I want to live.

B: Prove it.

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It rained...I remember it raining

The clouds mimicking our sadness

Mocking and cruel and... apt for this scene

Nothing left to be done...

We hugged and she left on the bus

I went back inside and sat with my friends

I cried...she cried...it made no sense

Why would I willingly do this to myself?

I went home that night and found them

The letters she had written to me...

I wonder if she still has the ones

I wrote to her...when I wasn't an idiot...

Leafing through the crumpled paper

I found the pictures she had drawn...

Designs for tattoos that wouldn't be needed

Because they were already carved into my heart

Roses For You And Me...

And a picture of them entwined...

Like we were the week before..

A lovers embrace...now just ink on a page

I always cry when I look at that picture...

It reminds me that I am a fool...

She's with someone else now...

And all I have are the roses

Roses For You And Me...

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Don’t watch TV. TV is a liar.

Don't let anyone talk you into what is right and what is wrong

Take responsibility for yourself and everything you say or do

Listen to the people who suit the situation you are in

Question other people and their reasons for their actions. not necessarily to their face, but

definitely to yourself

Don't take anyone else’s word for something

Make sure you are satisfied in everything you do

Listen to music

Don't accept other peoples definitions without question

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Number 8: Go 24 hours without food.

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There is no such thing as good or evil

Don't fall for scare tactics

Stand up for what you believe in

Don't be scared to be seen

When you are seen, make sure you are not wasting the attention

Make every moment count

Don't worry so much

Aim for greatness

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Page 28: Read: A Skeleton Project

Number 9: You are not static

You do not have to do the same as you are doing now, for all eternity

You can do whatever you want to

There are no rules

There are no laws

There is no judgement save for your own

There is no reason why you should feel oppressed

There is no fence

There are no walls

There is no ceiling

There is no limit

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One from the vaults. (101)

A) Fingerprints, retina scans. all well and good for catching terrorists. Except that guy with no eyes and hooks for hands.

B) NEED MONEY!?! GOT KNEECAPS??? YOU'VE GOT YOURSELF A DEAL!!!!!! C) My friend Jeff gave me some advice about doing stand-up, he said if you're nervous,

just imagine everyone naked. So i took his advice. In hindsight i should have thought about who I’d be performing in front of tonight. My parents. My girlfriend’s parents. That guy.

D) E) People sometimes say to me "what are you doing in my house?" and i say "shhh. be

vewy quiet. I’m hunting wabbits"

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Death of a theatre

Listen To Promises

Page 31: Read: A Skeleton Project

Number 10: Drink a coffee every 23 minuets

Done. But with errors on page.

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This is what it's come down to.

Listening to other people explain their understanding of the universe and trying to shave

and sand and polish my own ideas to fit into this jigsaw i have been presented with. I am

not learning anything new; at least i am certainly not accepting anything new. I keep

hearing and reading new ideas all the time and some of it stays with me and battles the

ideas i already have and loses, more often than not. For some reason, the ideas that i have

deemed not good enough, are destroying the ideas i want to embrace.

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There is a picture. No that’s not right. I’ll start again. There is an image, inside

your head. No Not inside your head. My head? No not in my head. There is an

image inside heads. It’s bright and clear and recognisable. So recognisable that

you, me, anyone who sees it knows it intimately as soon as it registers. As soon

as the light bounces into the eyes, down the optic nerve and into the brain.

The head sees itself and the universe in the image and knows the image so

intimately that there is no need for cognition and no need for deliberation.

Instantaneous understanding. Split second white outs and a feeling that the

head has come home. That image is everything. The be all and end all. The goal

of all research and all compilations of knowledge. All forward momentum in

the history of the timeless universe. . That is my goal, to find it and prove it and

show it to everyone and you will all say “Oh yeah. Now I understand.” That is

what it is. That is what we all strive towards. It is our benchmark, our

expectation, our goal, our finish line. Our final farewell and first greeting. That

is it. This is it. You. And me and us and them. We are it. And you will all say

“Oh yeah. Now I understand.”

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I'm tired of this. It's not enough that I’m learning and understanding more and more

about myself, for some reason I insist on making sure the mess that I am is undisturbed by

better, more reasonable ideas. All that gets through is the fear. All that I am doing is

learning what scares me. I'm tired of it. I can't fix myself it seems. All I can do is add

clothing to the trembling splodge of terror that I am. Clothing that covers up what I’m

thinking, but nonetheless leaves me essentially intact. I'm filling up with rage at the

thought that i can't actually write anything that I want to write. I want to write something

inspirational, at least for myself. Something that will make me think about what i am

doing to myself. Something that will at least attempt to describe what my brain is doing.

And i can't. I just go off on these semi mystical nonsense tangents and it pisses me off that

I am incapable of creating something. I want to be able to explain what colour the inside

of my mind is. And i don't even know for myself. I feel useless and without any sort of

artistic skill whatsoever. Everything i have made, be it music, art, writing, looks and

sounds like shit. And I know and have known in the past that it is not bad. It is just my

opinion of it. Even the songs that I loved when i wrote them. I can't listen to them and

hear that same spark of greatness that i heard the first few times. That knowledge that

they are in fact music, music that would be appreciated and enjoyed by many people is

not within me any longer. I can't understand how I can change my opinions so rapidly. I

would suggest that i may have some sort of brain chemistry imbalance, but as I’m saying

it, my mind is telling me "you weak piece of shit. You can't even work your own brain?

Why would you even think of telling people what you think? There is nothing wrong with

you. You are just weak."

But that’s not normal is it? Without getting into the debate of normal/abnormal, let’s just

say for now that that is not a correct way for a functioning human brain to operate. There

is no reason why i should feel insignificant or useless. There is no reason why I should

want to destroy everything I have created because it is pitiful garbage. There is no reason

why my mind should be disagreeing with everything i have just said. I know my brain is

fucked. But I don't believe that it's worth mentioning, or worth anyone’s time. Or worth

getting myself involved in. Just that for a few days/weeks every so often i will be here and

feel like hammers are living in my guts and I will know that I am the lowest of human

waste. I’ll tell myself it's not true, but my brain knows that it is.

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Shopping for ‘props’

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I suppose on some level, all this stuff that I’m reading is in the vain hope that I’ll come

across some word or sentence or paragraph that will make everything click. I'm looking for

something that will make my brain comprehend it all at once and then I’ll be able to work

out why I’m doing what I’m doing. But i don't think that such a thing exists. The more I

read about things the more I think that there is just one road that is the correct road, and

all the others have been based closely upon this original, so that those that have chosen

the correct one have done so only by luck or circumstance. Not by knowledge or some

supernormal discussion with demons or deities. I have found a number of interesting and

intriguing ideas, some of which draw me in and make me feel that I have found the right

one for me. And then something else comes and destroys that which I have found. One

commonality is that all these belief systems say that you should never accept anyone

else’s word as the truth, but you should decide for yourself. Don't blindly accept, but don't

blindly disregard it either. And so I am left reading pages and pages of hidden occult

knowledge and finding myself questioning everything I have believed or understood, and

at the same time there exists a strange sense of familiarity and unwillingness to give up

that which has done me well so far. I find myself clutching at ideas only to find that it

would mean overwriting my existing ideas. And do I really want to change that much? I

have changed so much already in the last year. Does the idea of losing my own personality

scare me so much? Yes it does, it scares me that the people that love me won't love me if

I’m a more capable human being. If I am not scared to leave the house anymore, then I

won't be available whenever my friends need me. A basic need to be loved I suppose is

the root. And looking at it now as words documented down, I can see that it is holding me

back. I am stopping myself from doing things that I would like to achieve simply because I

am scared. And it is fear that is holding me back. Fear is not discussed as much as it needs

to be. People preach endlessly about love and honour and loyalty and hope and friendship

and lust and trust and other completely intangible concepts, so exquisitely explored by

centuries of troubled authors, and more recently by swathes of media hacks trying any

trick to pull at our heartstrings and make us do what they want us to do. But fear, at least

fear of this magnitude, is not discussed.

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Fear of the universe.

Fear of the government.

Fear of what happens when we die.

Fear of getting left behind.

Fear of leaving others behind.

Fear of fear itself.

We are constantly told that fear is not welcome and that fear is your enemy. But we are

constantly bombarded with news stories, films, TV shows, headlines, books, talk shows,

documentaries showing us exactly the opposite. If you do not fear this new terror, you

will be a victim. Whatever the terror may be, suicide bombers, grey hair, verucas, bad

teeth, AIDS, global warming, nuclear weapons, bird flu, mad cow disease, pit bulls, bad

breath, stinky pits.

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If they invented a machine that could run on

peoples fear, we would have no need for nuclear

power stations, or any power stations at all for

that matter.

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We would all power our own homes 24 hours a day, the majority of that time only

because we are terrified that no-one will fuck us.

So why take this journey at all? Why look for something occult that could help show me

how i can be a better human being. Why question everything, only to fall for the first thing

that comes up with a flashy logo? It is all a question of being prepared. If I know that there

are people who are going to blow a whole lot of shit up in 10 minutes, I’m going to want

to get away from that place and find a nice safe area. Similarly, if I know that there is

something weird going on and I don't want to be a part of it anymore, I will go and find a

place that I feel is more in tune with my own personal beliefs. I know that I may not be

correct, and if it really all is just a guessing game then I suppose I should be thankful that I

know that and I haven't fallen into anyone's cleverly baited trap. But I think it is this fear

of everything that has drawn me out in the first place. This fear of "what if I’m wrong".

The fear that is driving the new sudden interest in reducing the world’s carbon footprint.

The fear that drives an atheist on his deathbed to renouncing his sins to a priest 'just in

case'.

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Test Space

For fans of Fresher

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This fear that can and does cause people to completely let go of everything that they have

ever believed in, purely because they really aren't sure at all if the cause they've worked

for their whole life is in fact the right one. It is this fear that rules everything. It is this fear

that debases us all and makes us into children who, seemingly, have to go running to

Uncle Jehovah whenever we encounter difficulties. Everyone running around with skinned

knees and bruised egos worrying that god isn't listening enough or that the government is

listening too much. None of it matters. No-one should have so much power over you that

they can tell you what you should be scared of. No-one should be able to make you

change your way of life 'just in case'. NO entity, be it physical, psychic, mental,

governmental or institutional, should have anywhere near that amount of power over

you.

And I for one will be scared no longer.

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Number 11: Repeat the words: What am I? Skin. Blood. Bones. Muscles? I am part of a

design. I am someone’s daughter. I am someone’s lover. I am someone’s friend. But what

am I? I am the sum of everything that had happened to me before. I am an equation, each

encounter, movement, situation, conversation or thought I have ever had, add them all up

and you get me. If you think about it that’s all any of us are right now. A version of our

selves. An ever changing version. I am not the same person I was one year ago. I am not the

same person I will be in a year. If I am the sum of everything that has happened in my life

then I am nothing more than a sponge. Absorbing emotion and situation into me to create a

polished version. And for this I will never be complete. When you realize this, that you’re

never complete you start to feel like there’s something missing. I only talk like I do because

of the way I was picked up speech patterns. I only walk like I do because of the environment

I learned. I only think like I do because that’s the way you taught me to think.

So if I am a sponge that means you can constantly change me. Teach me. Influence me. Tear

me. Reshape me. Every conversation I have had with you is embedded into me. You created

the person I am. People create versions of me every day. Every night that version dies, or

sheds into a new one… like a snake. This whole place is a fucking factory, spitting out

fragments of deception. Spitting out ideas and developing things. Well maybe that’s it for

me. Maybe I’m done absorbing you. I’m done changing. I am finalized and there’s no way

I’m waiting until the end of it all to become the end version of me, the finished factory

product. I am an equation. Solve me.

Sorry Lilly, that’s all I’ve got for now.

Best,

Matt

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Chapter 4: See you on the other side…

I thought i should cover the first topic any new company will come up against (once they've

designed their website and come up with sweet posters, obviously). Why am i doing this at

all?

It seems to be a fairly mundane question, but so few people actually ask it at the right time.

Those of you who are wondering now whether it is worth being in a theatre company, or

writing that one act solo show, in this current economic climate will be asking this question

fairly regularly. Those of you who are unsure as to where your work should be exhibiting will

probably be thinking about it a couple of times a month. Those of you, like us, who are

writing and performing work constantly just because we love doing it will probably never

ask yourself that question. Probably.

We considered it for about five minutes a couple of years ago and came up with an answer

that satisfied us enough that we didn't need to ever ask it again. We decided that we were

doing this (this being writing and performing as The Skeleton Project) because everything

else sucks in comparison.

Let me qualify that by saying that we are not even at a point where we consider ourselves at

the top of our game. We do not think that we are the best at anything, nor do we believe

that we have even hit our stride yet. But we do believe that working anywhere else, for

anyone else, doing anything else is completely out of the question, as far as careers go at

least.

A piece of wisdom that i always find myself passing on, whether i want to or not, is

something i heard from a woman i cant remember the name of. She said "Don't do

something because you can...do it because you can't not do it."

I was always inspired by this, and the people i have passed it onto were, in turn, less

impressed than i was. But i still stand by it. It doesn't matter whether you are raking in the

cash or living as a pauper. Something as demanding as writing, performing, painting,

photographing, documenting or re-presentation of any sort requires that you be invested

100% in it's process. There is no point only half doing it, getting bored after a couple of

years, and regretting all those hours you spent designing a logo.

Short version is this. If you wake up in the morning and want to write then you are a writer.

Write with all your heart and make as much out of it as you can. If you wake up and want to

take pictures then go and do it. Do it as best as you can. If you wake up and want to make a

lot of money, there are much easier, quicker ways to do that. Stock investment for example.

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Not that art has no money in it. But it is an exchange. You must love what you are doing,

and be willing to do it for free (because you will be doing a lot of it for free as you start.) But

you will be repaid for your work eventually. Scripts and ideas must keep you satisfied,

because that is where you need to be thriving. Once the tours and the international

speaking engagements start flooding in you will have the money to make it your primary

means of living. If you love it, you will do it anyway, regardless of what people say or do. If

you are not cut out for this kind of work, you will already be arguing with this paragraph and

thinking about a hundred nasty things to write in reply. My advice. Save it. Write a book.

Do it for love. Not for money. That's basically it.

Hopefully at least one person reading or flicking through this book of memories has found

some kind of inspiration or entertainment. If you have than I have been successful.

Listen to the end of things

I have summoned the blood.

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A SKELETON PROJECT

www.skeletonproject.co.uk : [email protected]