purim facebook status updates

7/27/2019 Purim Facebook Status Updates

1/6

Purim: Status Updates

King Achashveirosh has invited you to The Really Big Party Where I Impress Everyone and Get Mad PhatDrunk. Will you attend this event?

Yes No Maybe

Mordechai Hatzadikis TRYING TO GET EVERYONE TO STAY HOME!

Hashem likes this.

King Achashveirosh is waiting for his woman to show up.

Queen Vashti has joined the group Tail grooming.

King Achashveirosh is WHERE IS VASHTI!? WOMAN! GET IN HERE!

Memuchan: Dump the broad. Well getcha a new one, kingy.

X Queen Vashtiis no longer a valid Facebook user.

Esther Hadassah is hiding.

Mordechai Hatzadik likes this.

King Achashveirosh has posted a new album: Chicks of the world.Esther Hadassah has joined the group Living off of nuts and seeds, and taking really, reallylong baths..

King Achashveirosh and Esther Hadassah are now listed as married.
http://druyan.blogspot.com/2009/03/purim-status-updates_08.htmlhttp://druyan.blogspot.com/2009/03/purim-status-updates_08.htmlhttp://druyan.blogspot.com/2009/03/purim-status-updates_08.html


2/6

Memuchan has changed his name to Haman Harasha.

Esther Hadassah is so not into her new husband. Ick.

King Achashveirosh thinks GREEN is really attractive in a woman.

Mordechai Hatzadikis at the palace gates.

Bigsan and Teresh have joined the group Secret Plot to Kill the King.

Hashem orchestrated this.

Mordechai Hatzadikis like, hellooo, do they think theyre seminary girls on a bus speaking English who dont

realize everyone around them understands them?

Esther Hadassahis a little depressed that she had to save the Kings life.

King Achashveirosh needs a stiff drink.

X BigsanandTereshare no longer valid Facebook users.

Mordechai Hatzadikis at the palace gates.

Haman Harasha could really go for a three cornered, jelly filled cookie right about now.


3/6

Esther Hadassahwishes her husband would stop friending her. Some people really cant take a hint.

?Haman Harasha has created a new quiz: What date should I have all the Jews killed? Take the quiz now!

King Achashveirosh is feeling the economic pinch a little.

Haman Harasha:Funny you should mention that Ill private message you.

Haman Harasha has given King Achashveirosh a gift usingKikarKesefGrams.

King Achashveirosh has given Haman Harasha a gift usingFacebook Masculine Jewelry & Nose Pickers.

Mordechai Hatzaddikhas invited you to Big Tfila and Tshuva Rally To Save Your Jewish Hide. So far,645,878 of your friends are attending.

Hashem likes this.

Esther Hadassah is getting a little hungry, but hey, no checking lettuce for maror this year, right?

Mordechai Hatzadik: Did one of your maidservants forget to log you out again?

Esther Hadassah: My bad, my bad.

King Achashveirosh has joined the group Owners of Auto-expanding Scepters.

Esther Hadassahis so not looking forward to this banquet Two words: AMALEK BREATH.

Haman Harasha and King Achashveirosh are attending Esthers Wine Party, take I.


4/6

Haman Harasha and King Achashveiroshhave RSVPed for Esthers Wine Party, take II.

Haman Harasha is HOT STUFF, BABY! YOU KNOW IT!

Zeresh: Dont get too cocky yet. Anyway, its pizza again for dinner.

Haman Harasha: Woman, I demand steak.

Zeresh: As soon as your daughter takes out the chamber pot. I cant cook in this stench!

Haman Harasha: Leave her alone- I may have plans for that

Hashem: You have NO idea

Haman Harasha is putting up a big old tree in the backyard.

Zeresh likes this.

King Achashveiroshcant sleep.

All The Kings Horse is being groomed.

Mordechai Hatzadikis wishing I had a different barber.

Esther Hadassah: I warned you about Amalek Breath.

Haman Harasha note to self: when wife says chamber pot should be emptied, listen to her.

Zeresh is filled with foreboding.

Haman Harasha: So our daughter jumped out the window, but hey, Im still hot stuff with the Queen,

right? And we still have 10 strapping sons.

Zeresh:Once the Jews are on top, honey


5/6

Haman Harasha:Well see about that!

Zeresh:Even Scope cant save you now

King Achashveirosh is fuming!

Esther Hadassah: please get off your Blackberry and get back in here in a hurry, wouldya?

Charvonaits all about being in the right place at the right time!

Announcer: Charvona, you just fulfilled the point of your entire existence, brought about the downfall

of Haman Harasha and will be remembered by the Jews for a blessing forevermore! What are you going to do next?

Charvona:Im going to Disneyworld!

X Haman H arashais no longer a valid Facebook user.

X The groupHamans Sons is no longer a valid Facebook group.

King Achashveirosh is ready for another drink.

Mordechai Hatzadikis organizing sword practice.

Esther Hadassah likes this.

Esther Hadassah has scrolls to write.

Mordechai Hatzadikhas joined the group I wonder how quickly I can find 1,000,000 people who want to be

mekabel the Torah mahava.

Hashem likes this.


6/6

Mordechai Hatzaddikand Esther Hadassah have invited you to Purim: this year and everyyear. The entire Jewish nation is attending.

(With apologies to those of you who don't 'do' Facebook. Happy Purim ya'll!)

purim facebook status updates

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