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**CELESTIALSOUND/MUSIC(BRAHMANAAD)**

IprostratebeforeShreeShivBaba,theAnalogousPersonifiedFormofLordShivaandoffermy

Salutations..

RightfrommychildhoodIhadinnercuriositytoknowParamatma,andIcouldnotfindanypathtoturn

inwards.Allthepathsofknowledgeseemedtomoveoutwardsbuttherewasnoonewhocouldguide

meontheinwardpath.IhadnotmetanyGuruinmylifewhohadknowledgeoftheinwardpathorwho

couldshowmetheway.

SeveralGurusenteredmylifeinthefieldofeducation,inthefieldof(thegameof)kabaddi,inthe

fieldofswimming,intheareaofadministration,inthefieldofmarketingorinthefieldoforganization,

butIhaveonlycometoknowabouttheexternalworldthroughwhateverknowledgeIobtainedfrom

them.OnlymyintellecthasdevelopedthroughtheknowledgeIobtainedfromthem;andasmyintellect

begantodevelop,myegoalsoincreasedsimultaneously.Iamawareofthis;andasthisknowledge

continuedtogrow,Iamawareofthattoo.NowIhavealsounderstoodthattherespectIreceivedfrom

peopleinsocietyduetothisexternalknowledgealsoincreasedmyego.Iobtainedthetrustofpeople

throughthisexternalknowledgebutthattooincreasedmyegothatpeoplehavesomuchfaithinme.

Icouldobtainunlimitedwealththroughthisexternalknowledgebutmyegoincreasedduetothewealth

too.Itappearedthatmyphysicalbodycouldobtaincomfortsandfacilitiesduetothewealthwhichwas

theresultofexternalknowledge.Howeverinreality,therewasnohappinessinit,onlyfacilitiesand

comforts;andthosefacilitiesalsoonlyincreasedmyegothatIhadobtainedallthefacilitiesand

comforts.Iobtainedvariousgadgetsandinstrumentsthroughthewealthduetomyexternal

knowledge,butthehabitofusingthesegadgetsandinstrumentsmademyphysicalbodyloveandenjoy

thecomforts.Myquestcontinueddespiteobtainingallthis,althoughIwasnotawareofwhatIwas

searchingfor.RightfrommychildhoodIwouldalwaysfeelthatthegoalofmylifewasnottoobtainall

thesethings;thegoalwasquitedifferent,butIwasnotawareofwhatmygoalwas.

Ihadobtainedallthatayoungmandreamsofobtaininginhislife,butIwasstillunsatisfied;andIwas

alsoawarewhyalltheGuruswereonlyindicatingandguidingpeopleontheexternalpath,andwhythe

externalknowledgecouldnotleadtosatisfaction.NomatterhowmuchexternalknowledgeIobtained,

italwaysseemedtomethatthiswasaveryvastareaandthatIstillhadtoobtainalotofknowledgein

thisfield.ThenassoonasIobtainedit,anotherareawouldappearbeforeme;andthenlaterthatfield

alsowouldappeartobedeceptive.Itseemedthatallthepathsofexternalknowledgeweremoving

fartherandfartheraway.ThesewerethepathswhichwouldneverendevenifIwalkedallmylifeon

them.ThenIwouldfeelthatnopathtomoveinwardsexists,orperhapsthepersonwithknowledgeto

guidemeinwardshasnotyetenteredmylife.Doesthepathtogoinwardsexistatall?Canonereallygo

inwards?Canonegettoknowoneself?Becausenomatterhowmuchyouobtaintheexternal

knowledgelikethelayersofanonion,intheendonedoesnotachieveanything.Iwouldalwaysfeelthat

Ihadbeendeceived;andwheneverIspoketoanyoneaboutgoinginwards,thepersonbeforemewould

thinkthatIwascrazybecausehewasnotawareofanysuchpathwhichwouldtakeoneinwards;andhe

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wasquitesurethatnosuchpathexisted.Therefore,everyonewouldlookatmewithastonishment;and

thenIheardaboutthesaintsandGuruswhohadwalkedonthisinnerpath,andthatnoneofthemwas

aliveanymore.Thereforetherewasnoquestionofmeetingthemoraskingthemanything.However,

nowtheproblemwashowtosearchforthisinnerpathandhowtosearchforaGuruwhocouldguide

metotheinnerpath;andIhavewanderedlikeacrazypersonformany,manyyearswiththisquestion.

Iwouldsitallaloneforhourstogether,ponderingoverthissubjectbecausethetopicitselfwassuch

thatitcouldnotbeunderstoodbypeople;andintheinappropriateatmospherearoundme,eachofmy

companionswasrunningaroundtryingtoobtainasmuchexternalknowledgeaspossible.Theirmain

aiminlifewastoobtainasmuchexternalknowledgeaspossible,tousetheknowledgetoincreasetheir

expertise,andtousetheexpertiseasmuchaspossibletoearnmoreandmoremoney;thenafter

earningmoremoney,touseitforobtainingmoreandmorefacilitiesfortheirphysicalbodies.This

runningaroundformoreandstillmorewouldstretchonlyuptogettingfacilitiesfortheirphysical

bodiesandthenitwouldend.However,Icouldnotvisualizeinnerhappinessandinnerpeaceanywhere

inthisstrenuousrunningaround;instead,Icouldonlyseethevicestowhichtheywereaddicteddueto

thestressandmentaltensioncausedbythisrunningaround.

Ijustcouldnotunderstandwhythesepeoplecalledmecrazy,andactuallytheyappearedcrazytome

becauseIcouldnotperceiveanydestinationtowhichthisrunformoneycouldlead.They

misunderstoodmeandIthoughtthattheywerewrong;andthequestionofwhowasrightalways

remainedpresent.Iwouldfeelthatsuchpeoplecomeandgoaway;buttodayonlytheSaintsand

Mahatmasareconsideredtobeidealwhosesearchhasbeenwithinandwhohavebeensuccessfulin

goinginwardsintheirlives,thosewhohavewalkedontheinnerpathalthoughtheymayhavebeen

consideredworthlessduringtheirlives,calledcrazymendicants(fakirs),orcrazythakurs.Buttodaythe

samesaintswhowerecalledcrazyarerespectedinoursociety.AtthattimeIwaspassingthroughavery

strange

mental

state.

There

was

darkness

in

all

directions

and

no

ray

of

light

could

be

seen

anywhere,

andIusedtofeelthatmyentirelifewouldcometoanendinthissamedarknesssincenorayoflight

wasvisibleinthisbirth.Ialsofeltthatperhapsthedesirefortheinnerpathhadbeenawakenedinthis

birthandthereforeIwouldfindthepathtogoinwardsduringmynextbirth.However,theproblemwas

thatIhadnotfoundanysaintorSatguruwhohadknowledgeabouttheinnerpathinsociety,andIdid

nothavethevisiontolookoutsidesociety.Ihadonlyheardthatthereisaninnerpath,andthat

Brahmanaadcanbeheardinsideoneself.

Brahmanaadistheinnersoundandtohearitisthesupremespiritualexperienceofoneslife,thatit

wasinsidemyselfandyetIwasnotabletohearit.ButatthattimeIdidnothavetheknowledgethatit

cannotbeheardaslongastheIispresent.AnemptyplaceiscreatedonlyaftertheIends,andthat

soundiscreatedautomaticallyandthejoyofthatsoundisunique.ButIdidnotmeetanyonewho

wouldeventalkaboutBrahmanaad,nordidanyonehaveanyinformationaboutit.Allthesefactswere

confinedtobooksandalltheSatguruswhohadobtainedthisspiritualexperiencewerealsoconfinedto

books.Actually,allthesethingswerenotmentionedintheirbiographiesatall.Theywereonlypresent

inthePuranasandscriptures.SometimesIwouldfeelthatthepureandholyatmospheredidnotexist

anymorewheresuchfactscouldbementioned,norweresuchpureandclearsoulspresentwheresuch

talkcouldhappen.Allthepeopleseemedtobepartofthehurryandscurryofthematerialisticworld.

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ButduringsuchadarkperiodoftimeIwouldrememberwhatmygrandmotherhadsaidthat

Paramatmaexistedinthepast,existsinthepresenttime,andwillexistinthefuturetoo,althoughitis

truethatHisformwouldhavechangedaccordingtothedemandsoftime.Thiswastheonlysentence

whichwastherayoflightinmylife;andIwasmovingforwardwiththehopefulsupportthatIshould

onlycontinuetohavethedesireforit.Nomatterwhatthepathaheadwaslike,itwoulddefinitelyopen

upassoonasmystatebecomepureandholy.

AtatimewhenIwasinthisframeofmind,youyourselfcalledmeandgavemedarshan.Iwasnoteven

worthyenoughtoreceiveyourdarshanandyourgiftwaspossibleonlyduetoyourcompassion.

IrealizedbyyourGraceandinyourproximitythatParamatmaisnotoutsidebutwithinme.Youhad

movedinwardsandthereforeyouwereawareaboutthepathtogoinwards;andyouhadnotonlygone

inwardsbuthadreachedinwardsandhadmadecontactwithParamatma.Youmademeobtaina

spiritualexperience(anubhooti)andIacceptedthesameanubhootiasthepath,andtherestofmy

journeyoflifewascompletedwiththesupportofthatanubhooti.Afterobtainingtheanubhootifrom

youIcametoknowthatalltheGurusgiveexternalknowledgeinlifeandtakeusfarawayfromourown

selves.ButonlytheSatguruknowsabouttheinnerpath,andonlyhecanguideyouonit.Thenafter

walkingontheinnerpathIcametoknowthatthisisthepathwhichgoesstraighttoParamatma,and

afterreachingParamatma,theIismergedwithParamatma.AfterthatParmatmaandIarenot

separateanymore.Oneobtainsakindofinnersatisfaction,oneexperiencesinnerpeaceandallthe

runningaroundcomestoanend;andthenonefeelsthatoneslifehasbeensuccessful.The

Brahmanaadwhichonehearsaftergoinginwardscannotbedescribedatall;myhandsarenotcapable

ofdescribingit.IfindmyselfgoingintomeditationwhilstrememberingthatincidentandIhavestarted

hearingthesameBrahmanaadagaininsidemyself.AfterreachingParamatmaandobtainingthehigh

peakintheformofGauriShankar(Divinity),Iamexperiencingakindofpeace;Ihaveachievedakind

of

inner

satisfaction

that

I

have

reached

and

obtained

Paramatma.

Now

there

is

nothing

more

left

to

be

obtainedinlife.Thepurposeoftakingbirthhasbeenfulfilledandthereforethereisnopurposeleftto

takeanotherbirth.IhavealsoobtainedthesupremepeakofMokshabyyourGraceandyouhave

askedmetoofferyouGuruDakshinabymakingitpossibleforeachandeverysoulthatwishestoobtain

thesupremepeakofMokshatoachieveit.Youhavegivenmethekaryaofpreparingthepathtoreach

thathighestpeakandIstillcontinuetoperformit.

Ihaveconveyedthegift(Prasad)ofanubhootiwhichyouhavegivenmetoeverysadhakexactlyasyou

hadgivenittome.Thereisnochangeinit,nothinglessinit,norhaveIaddedanythingnewtoitfrom

myside.Theoriginalformoftheanubhootiisstillintactbutevensomyentirelifechangedjustwithone

anobhootimyintellectfellawayandmyentireegobrokedown.Whyisthesamethingnot

happeningwiththesadhaks?Aretheynotsuitabletoobtaintheanubhootiorhasthetimeforthem

toobtainitnotarrivedasyet,ordotheystillhavetoundergosomemoreexperiences?Itissaidthat

nooneobtainsanythingmorethantheyaredestinedfororbeforetheyaredueforit.ButtodayIpray

toyounottowaitfortheirdestinedtime.Iwishthatmysadhaksshouldprogressspirituallyasfastas

possiblesothattheydonothavetoenduretheirremainingexperiences.Maytheirchittamove

inwardsfromtheexternalworldandtheytooshouldbeabletostarthearingthesoundofBrahmanaad

likeme.Thisismyrequesttoyou,

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Yourdisciple,

BabaSwami

28/7/11