Overcome Soft Addictions:Habits That Keep Us From Our Goals

Why are we talking about addictions?

We are witnessing a growing trend of addictions , demoralizing desires and temporary pleasures.

What is the purpose of our life?

“And I did not create the jinn and mankind except to worship Me. “[Qur'an: Chapter 51, Verse 56]

Do we know of our purpose,ourdestination

why do we continue to live for the dunya (this world, as opposed to the Hereafter) as if it were our only goal and the real essence of our existence?

Discuss with your partner and share

What do we do when we have nothing to do?

How often we have nothing to do?

Where is our most time spent…..

in front of televisions

computer screens

game consoles

investing our precious time in unprofitable matters

and in many cases, haram exposure.

Do you agree?

We want our parents to waste away their wealth in masking our insecurities and fulfilling a moment’s thrill for a lifetime of debt.

What is the effect of all this?

These addictions are paralysing the progress of our Ummah (Islamic community), causing us to neglect our deen (religion) and preventing us from fulfilling our true goal as servants of Allah subḥānahu wa ta'āla

(glorified and exalted be He), Al-Hakam (The Judge).

Addiction: An Islamic Perspective

With the word addiction what does come to your mind?

The term addiction is most commonly understood with respect to a chemical association — the compulsive use and dependence on drugs, alcohol and nicotine.

Definitely dangerous addictions -The soft addictions.

Soft addictions are seemingly harmless habits

over-shopping

Overeating

watching too much TV

endlessly surfing the Internet

procrastinating etc.

that keep us from having the life we want.

Soft Addictions…….

They cost us money

rob us of time

numb us from our feelings

mute our consciousness

drain our energy.

And we all have them.

(Judith Wright, author of The Soft Addiction Solution)

As Judith Wright described, soft addictions are those habits that keep us from the life we want.

What kind of life do you wish to have?

What kind of life Allah wants us to have?

What is our destination?

Surely, as Muslims we want Jannah (paradise) and seek the pleasure of Allah subḥānahu wa ta'āla (glorified and exalted be

He) alone.

How do these addictions effect us?

These addictions, distract us from fulfilling our true purpose and goals in life. They have the dangerous potential to take us away from the pure path of Islam, and slowly guide us to a path that leads us to hell fire. May Allah subḥānahu wa ta'āla

(glorified and exalted be He) safeguard us.

What gives you immediate satisfaction?

What happens next ?

While we might engage in these activities to pass time or escape reality, the satisfaction does not last and we want it again.

The immediate satisfaction we gain from these acts can very quickly become a compulsive pursuit, and before we know it, we are falling sinfully into the hands of shaytan (Satan), attaching ourselves to the dunya and neglecting our Creator!

A reminder of our purpose…

Ibn Mas’ud (may Allāh have mercy upon him) narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allāh be upon him) said:

“The feet of the son of Adam shall not move from before his Lord on the Day of Judgement, until he is asked about five things: about his life and what he did with it, about his youth and what he wore it out in, about his wealth and how he earned it and spent it upon, and what he did with what he knew.“ [Jami at-Tirmidhi]

We must protect ourselves from becoming servants to our desires

stop being deceived by the world.

We must learn to recognise the difference between the absolute and the contingent, the real and the fleeting.

What is real?

The Real is gaining the pleasure of Allah subḥānahu wa ta'āla (glorified

and exalted be He), a pleasure that will transcend into the afterlife.

What is fleeting?

The Fleeting is the attainment of self-pleasure, a pleasure that will remain contained in the illusions of this temporary world.

“And indeed the Hereafter is better for you than the present (life of this world). And verily, your Lord will give you (all that is good) so that you shall be well-pleased. “[Qur'an: Chapter 93, Verses 4-5]

“On the Day when every person will be confronted with all the good he has done, and all the evil he has done, he will wish that there were a great distance between him and his evil.” … [Qur'an: Chapter 3, Verse 30]

A simple 4 step plan to help you battle those addictions.

Keep A Diary

Time to Reflect

Make a plan

Remind yourself

Keep A diary

The first step is very simple, I want you to keep a detailed journal for 1 week.

Look deeply into your daily routine and note down what you do and how much time you spend doing it. What did you do? When did you do it? Where were you? Who were you with?

Time to reflect

Now that you have your journal, it is time to reflect and refocus.

Take some time to read through your diary and highlight any bad habits or things that you would like to change in your day. It is all about identifying the need, or even the space for improvement, and most importantly recognising your soft addictions.

We cannot stop an addiction or bad habit until we recognise it to be a problem to begin with.

Make a plan

Researchers have found that behind every habit, there is a neurological loop consisting of 3 parts:

A routine

a cue

a reward.

If we can identify these, we can better target and prevent bad habits

The Routine is what you have already done in steps 1 and 2 above —identifying addictions or bad habits.

The Cue is what leads you to engage in the habit. By identifying this, you can be prepared for the habit or even avoid it.

The Reward is what you essentially gain from engaging in that habit. By identifying this, you can search for alternatives

By replacing a bad habit with a healthier alternative that gives you the same reward, you are more likely to remain steadfast as you will not feel a sense of loss because what you seek is achieved through the healthier habit.

Remind yourself

To successfully tackle your addictions, you must regularly, in fact, constantly remind yourself of your purpose and the reality of death and judgement. It is important to have daily reminders to help keep you focused and disciplined.

Suggest some options that can be used as reminders