BY

AVA S06E S

ng~

naware

Introduction by NORMAN VINCENT PEALF-:

,'HIRD PRINTIl':GIIO,(I{)O COPIES $l.oo

2

AngelUnaware

DALE EVAl S ROGERS

Introduction by

NORMAN VINCENT PEALE

This is the story of Robin Eliznbeth

ROBers, who came to earth on a very

special mission.

\'(Iriting in brilliant, tender words,

he.r mother- the wife of Roy Rogers,

Ame.rica's foremost cowboy star - tells

the story of their daughtu, who p2Sstd

away 10 August, 19n.

Little Robin cune into the '\\"Orld

with a tragic handicap. \Vbat it was,and what it did to both Robin and her

parents, the reader will learn as he reads

this heart-rending story.

(Colltil/lled Oil brlrk flap)

cY1nge[

Un ware

oIfnse!

UnawareBY

DALE EVANS ROGERS

A

COPYRIGHT, MCMLm. BY

PLBM.ING H. RBVRLL COMPANY

P,.,nttJ in tlx Unittd St411s tlf Armriu

Wesrwood, N.J.-316 Third AVaJueLos Angeles 41-2173 Colorado Boulevard

London E.C.4-29 Ludgare HillGlasgow C.2-229 Bothwell Street

ne House of..Rosers

by NOUUN Vn-.~'T PBALII

EuznBTII (my ten4year-old daughter):and I had been:all-out lam of Roy Rogers and Dale: Evans 100& bd'orewe knew them as pc:rsona.I friends. We: loved theirmovie: and lV adventures, but Wt wasn't all; wesc:nsed something fine and wholesome in what theysaid and did, in their dynamic pc:rsonalicies. in the:radiant joy and 10ubJe: humility which is 50 mach apon 01 th<ID_

Then they surted coming to New Yorlt for theirRodeo in Madisoo Square Garden, and evay Sundaymorning I uw them in my COllgn:gacioo at MarbleCollegiate Church. We rc:nunlld the: compliment byattending the: Rodeo. We were thrilled as they racedabout the.arena and as Roy sang " Peace in the Valley"-:l song tb.at is balf ballad and half hymn. But wewere moved d«ply when he said to the roungs~ inhis "Congregation," "I hear some kid says it is sissystulT to go to SiJnday schooL Don't you believe him.Sunday school is lor be-men." The .awe with whichthe children accepced this convinced me th.at cowboysarc: often more effective preachers than the preachersthemselves.

Their business is entertainment; their purpose is [0

speak lor God in their daily work. By [heir words.

-s-

•6 THE HOUSE OF ROGERS

their kindliness and their uprightness and their loveof people, they turn the mind of everyone they meetto God—a rare and beautiful accomplishment, in ourkind of world!

Dale Evans does just that, in this little book. Sheis a mother who has won great victory over greatsorrow. When she first told me the story you will readhere, I realized that I was hearing of an amazing ex-perience and standing in the presence of a great soul.I saw at once that Robin, her baby, had not lived anddied in vain. Where most babies die and leave themother crushed, Robin put on immortality and hermother found the very joy of God in what mightotherwise have been an overwhelming tragedy.

The sweetness, the touching humor and spiritualunderstanding with which little Robin Rogers talkswith God in this book will comfort and strengthenall who read it, as it did me when I read the manu-script—through misty eyes.

This is one book I'll never forget.

Foreword

This is the story of what a baby girl named RobinElizabeth accomplished in transforming the lives of theRoy Rogers family.

Our baby came into the world with an appallinghandicap, as you will discover when you read her story.

I believe with all my heart that God sent heron a two-year mission to our household, to strengthenus spiritually and to draw us closer together in theknowledge and love and fellowship of God.

It has been said that tragedy and sorrow neverleave us where they find us. In this instance, both Royand I are grateful to God for the privilege of learningsome great lessons of truth through His tiny messenger,Robin Elizabeth Rogers.

This is Robin's story. This is what I, her mother,believe she told our Heavenly Father shortly aftereight p.m. on August 24, 1952.

Dale Evans Rogers

Be not forgetful to entertainstrangers: for thereby some haveentertained angels unawares.

Hebrews 13:2

OH, FATHER, it's good to be home again. Ithought sometimes that You had forgottenme, Down There. Two years Up Here doesn'tseem like much, but on earth it can be a long,long time—and it was long, and often hard,for all of us.

When You lifted me up from the earth,just a few minutes ago, it was Sunday, andmy Mommy and Daddy were crying, andeverything seemed so dark and sad and con-fused. And all of a sudden it was brightand clear and happy, and I was in Your arms.Was it the same way for them Down There,Father? You can put me down, now; I'mperfectly all right, now that I'm rid of thatlump of hindering clay....

That music sounds nice—it's even nicerthan the music I heard Down There. I guessa lot of people didn't know it, but Down

.9.

•10• ANGEL

there I had as much music as I had pain.[ had my own little red radio, and my nurselet me play it whenever I wanted to. And Ihad the sweetest little white wooley horse,with tunes in his tummy, and he played forme every night on my pillow, right beforeI went to sleep. Of course, I loved horses,maybe because Daddy was a cowboy andloved them, too.

Mommy often took me in to play on thebig piano, and I had a little toy piano, too,that I used to pound day and night. Ithelped.

Yes, there was music. I even heard happysongs that they couldn't hear. They just sawmy sickness, and they felt sorry for me. ButI knew why I was sick, and that because Iwas sick I could do things for them; andas they say Down There, that was "musicto my ears."

It was quite an experience, Father. WhenYou sent me on that earthly mission, I neverdreamed what it would be like, or how muchWe could do, in two short years. We did alot.

WELL, ON August 26, 1950 (earth time) I

UNAWARE •11•

woke up in a place they called a "hospital,"and I could see people in white robes stand-ing all around. Just like it is Up Here, Father—white robes all around. One of them, anurse, said, "She's blue." I didn't knowwhat that meant, but I did know that every-thing was going according to the Plan. Theysaid something about a cord being wrappedaround my neck, and they slipped that off,and I felt more comfortable. They spankedme a little to make me cry (and laughedwhile they did it!), and then they put me ina funny little thing called an "oxygen box,"and the doctor turned away from me to helpthe woman on the table. That was myearthly mother.

She opened her eyes and turned to look atme, and she said, "Hi, Robin. You're beau-tiful!" Then they wheeled her out to herown room, to rest.

The doctor came back to me and lookedat me, hard. He seemed so worried about methat I started worrying about him. Someother doctors and nurses came and stoodlooking down at me and whispering amongthemselves, and they started doing all sortsof odd things to me to make me move around.

•12• ANGEL

They told each other that something waswrong, because I didn't "respond" to their"tests" like the other babies did. Poor souls!I could have told them that this, too, waspart of the Plan. But they couldn't knowthat—they didn't have eyes to see You therebeside me, or ears to hear Your voice.

They didn't realize that You provide cer-tain conditions in order to accomplish somewonderful purpose. A lot of them DownThere don't understand yet, Father, thatYou always have a blessing in mind, ineverything You plan. Many mothers, withbabies like me, wouldn't be so bitter and soheart-broken if they just knew You andYour ways better.

The doctor who "delivered" me cameback. (I like that word "delivered"; itmakes the doctors seem like Your agents,or Your "mail-men" Down There.) Hebrought three children's doctors (called"pediatricians")—and how they did talk!And shake their heads! I heard one of thenurses say, "She has Mongoloid eyes." Iwondered what Mongoloid meant. Theyseemed to think it was something awful.

Art Rush was there, too; he's Daddy's

•14• ANGEL

BUT THE doctors and nurses weren't sohappy. They were all dreading the timewhen they'd have to tell Mommy and Daddyabout the bad shape I was in. WheneverMommy got to boasting about me to hernurse, the nurse would change the subject.That happened several times, and Mommybegan to get suspicious. Finally she askedthe nurse right out if there was anythingwrong with me, and the nurse looked awayand said she wasn't allowed to discuss my"condition."

One day the nurse slipped; she said thatthe doctor had said something about mybeing a "borderline" baby. Mommy's facewent white, and she asked the nurse, "Didhe say . . . Mongoloid?" I felt so sorry forthat nurse! She didn't know what to saythen, and she tried to make the best of it bysaying, "Don't be worried. There is only athin line between genius and insanity. Somehandicapped children have turned out to beexceptionally brilliant. They can go—eitherway."

When the doctor came, Mommy went forhim! He was a good doctor; he had a bigheart under that white coat. He said he

UNAWARE •15•wasn't just sure yet, and he hadn't said any-thing to Mommy because he didn't want toworry her before she got on her feet, but Ihadn't responded very well to some of theirtests. Otherwise I was "all right"—and Ihad rallied quite well in the last two days.But my "muscle-tone" was poor, I hadtrouble swallowing my food, and I seemedto be listless. He said that symptoms likethese, at birth, sometimes meant the babymight not develop as it should.

Mommy asked him what she and Daddyshould do. What did anybody do with aMongoloid baby? Doctor said gently thatthere wasn't much anyone could do; thefew institutions for such babies were over-crowded, and the State homes and hospitalswouldn't take in "one of these children"until he was four years old. Then he saidsomething fine:

"Take her home and love her. Love willhelp more than anything else in a situationlike this—more than all the hospitals andall the medical science in the world." That'sone thing I learned Down There, Father—that the doctors are just beginning to dis-cover how much help You are in any situa-

tion. They're beginning to talk seriouslyabout' 'tender, loving care." You are gettingthrough to t~ doctors.

When the doctor left, Monuny started tocry. She said rhere should he som, place forbabies like me. Why didn't somebody dosomething about it? 1\1aybe--and my heartmissed a beat when I heard her say it-maybeit was high time the Rogers' did somethingabout surting a Foundation for handicappedbabies. I loved that-not because it couldhelp me, but because it looked. like the firstfruit of my mission Down There. Becau,se Ihad come to them, they were a1I:eady plan­ning to help others like me!

But Mommy kept on crying, and Daddysaid, "Don't cry. God will take care of herjshe's in His hands, and His bands are bigenough to hold her. We will pray, and trustHim."

That was just like my Daddy. He has al­ways trusted You. but You know, he did getto wondering sometimes. He didn't doubtthat everything was being taken care offrom Up Here-not that. Daddy had been aChristian for some time before I came, butlike most people Down There, he saw things

·16· ANGEL UNAWARE ,17·

that hurt his heart, and he couldn't helpasking questions.

It always hurt him to see little crippledchildren, and he'd ask, "Why? Why? Where'sGod? I know He's a loving God, but if Heloves these children, why does He let themsuffer?" A lot of falks ask these questions,Father, and a lot of them never seem to getany answers, Daddy did!

He began to read his Bible, as thoogh hebad never seen it before. And he prayed,more and more often. I could see the changein bis face; it was quiet now, He seemed tobe getting hold of himself. We were gettingto him, Father; a new Roy Rogers was beingborn.

They took me "home." to the h,ouse inthe Hollywood Hills.

THERE WAS a sweet nurse. named Donna,waiting for me, when we got hom~andthe three brothers and sisters You sent onahead of me. My brother Dusty ran up rothe nurse who was holding me and said,"Can I see the baby?" He put his finger onmy forehead and asked, "Is she real?" AndCheryl and Linda laughed and cooed over

·18· ANGEL UNAWARE ·19·

me and said the nicest things to me, and theythought I was wonderful. They didn't seeanything wrong. Children never do. Theyhave clear, sharp eyes that look 'way down,and what they see is always beautiful.

Donna was like that, too; she had broughtDusty through the first six months of hislife, and she kept telling Mother and Daddythat I was going to be all right. She wasspeaking the truth, and didn't realize it l

Once she asked Mommy if "R-H NegativeBlood Factor" had anything to do with theway I turned blue when I tried to take milkout of the bottIe. Mommy said the doctorshad told her we the R-H Factor bad noth­ing to do with my condition.

Poor Donna. slipped and fell and broke herwrist, so another sweet, motherly nursenamed "Jo" came to take care of me.

They put me in a contraption called a"bassinet, .. and tried hard to make me drinkthat milk. I had a hard time of it; I couldn'tseem to get suction enough. It made me sotired, and my whole left arm would turnblue. And my head was wobbly as anything!I just couldn't seem ro conuol it. Mommyworried over that; they almost had to tie

ber in bed to keep her from coming in andstanding over me, looking anxious.

The milk business was bad enough, butwhen I was three weeks old a doctor ex­amined me and found that I had developeda heart murmur. He said he was afraid ofthat; it was just another "Mongoloid symp­tom." He said he alw.ays advised parents, insituations like this, to put the baby in a"home"; they'd have to give the child upsometime, anyway, and it was easier to do itquickly, before the child became entrenchedin their hearts. He said that mothers gavechildren like this all their attention, andwere likely to neglect the other children inthe family. He was a kind man, and hemeant well, but what he said left Mommyso stunned she couldn't answer.

Daddy said, "Nol We'll keep her and doall we can for her, and take our chances."Mommy smiled then; she was glad, and shesaid what I had been waiting to hear her say:that You had sent me for some specul reason,and they had no right to cast aside anythingor anyone You had sent.

She said she was sorry for other parentswho had babies like me. Father, it iJ hard.

·20· ANGBL

It was hard fot Daddy aDd Mommy-butworth every tear and hearuche it cost! I sawwhat was happening: already, they were be­ginning CO appreciate Your Cross....

MoMMY lCEPT trying to make me smile. ThepedUtrician keptaslcing her, "Has she smiledyet?" He said if a baby dido't smile until hewas three months old, it meant that he wasat least fifty per cent ret2Ided in his menulgrowth. Mommy didn't want to leave me,for ;tOything, until she saw that smile.

Ob, Father, she aDd Jo tried so hard tomake me smilel Mommy worked overtimeon that. I was never out of her thoughts.She was too "possessive" about me, and thatwasn't good.

Of course, there was a reason for that.Mommy had always been "career-minded,"Even when she was a young girl she wantedto succeed, and succeed !J;t" in show business,and for a. long time she put that career beforeeverything else in her life. But after I ar·rived, it didn't seem to mean so much to her,after ali.

We took care of that "success" businessin short otder, didn't Wcl She seemed to be

UNAWAllB

trying to push all thought of her career outof her mind, so as to have more room in hermind for me. She wa.s always praying for me,always hovering over me. Then she realizedthat giving me all her time and attentionmight be had, tOO; there were other childrenin the house, and it wasn't fair to them. Shetried to share her time and her love withDusty and Cberyl and Linda and Daddy, andto go on with her work:.

It was quite a struggle she went through,trying to find OUt what You wanted her todo about all this, You used a mighty hotfire in purging her for Our use, Father, but,the flame was healing, too.

Daddy was trying to learn, too.JUSt before they left to go on the tour,

Daddy came intO my room with a funny­loolcing thing ca.lIed a "ca.mera," He ran thewindow-shades up highj Your sun hit myweak eyes full force, and I set up quite ahowl. Daddy went ahead and took a lor ofpicrnres of me; he loved pictures and cam­eras. He wasn't satisfied to take pictures in­side; be had to take me out on the porch,and "shoot" some more.

He was a lot of fun, my Daddy-every-

any more. Bless his hean, he was learningthat it isn't really we innocent children whosuffer, it's the ones around us who sufferwhile they're learning how to be obeelient[Q Your will.

Mommy was always trying to figure it out-to find some reason Ior my "aflliccion:'Sometimes she said maybe it was part of thePlan to send Daddy and her an a.Jllicted childso Daddy could understand .11 a.Jllicted chil­dren; other times she thought it was becauseof some old sin or si.n.s--a.nd then she wouldthink of some wonderful Christhn havingthe same trouble she was having, and she'dask, "Why?" and get all mixed up again.

But getting mUed up a little doesn't mat­ter, does it, Father? Anybody who thinksgets confused. sooner or later. Bur I noticedDo",ro There we those who tried to th.in1:out things about You and Your ways usuallyfound a way out of their confusion. It wasthose who didn't care enough co think at allthat I felt sorry for. I always thought it wasthe not caring and not think-iog that wassinful, not the being confused.

When I was twO months old, my parentshad to go o(f on one of those "personal

·22· ANGBL

body JOyed him Down There. He w.s soyoung in spirit-just like a boy-and afterI came he seemed. younger than ever. Youwouldn't believe it, but he was often shyand nervous when he faced crowds. But notafter he got to reading his Bible .nd smdyingme! After awhile he was relaxed. and con­fident, and sure of himself. and nOt nervousat all. I think it was because he came eounderstand that Your arms were alwaysbeneath him. as they were beneath me;a.ndthat You wouldn't let either one of us fall.

I loved him the first time I saw him, andmany a time I wished I could have a heart­to-hean talk with him, because he was try­

ing so hard to find out what You had inmind. I think he'd been trying to find outabout t.h.u before We went to work on him,because once I heard him s.y that his bigsuccess came to him because oI ill the lettershe gOt from boys .nd girls, s.ying theyprayed for him. ow his idea of success waschanging; We were reaehing him that realsuccess was .spiritual.

He was changing. all right. The old ques­tion aboue why God let innocent childrensuffer didn't seem to bother him very much,

UNAWARB ·23·

appearance" tour, and they took me ouc toJo's hou e, here it was nice and dry andsunny. It a cold and damp in Hall oodHill ,and ommy didn' I: think that wouldbe good for me. She an Daddy ere finish­ing u a "recording" of a radio broadcast,buc th cam OUt to ee me the very next

day.That day there was a consultation ith

two doctors. The said I had a very bad heartcondition, and that I probably ouldn t liveerr long, bUI: for ommy and Daddy to go

ahead ith the tOur, because nothing onIdhappen for ix months, anyway. ommya k h they cou1dn t operate on myheart, and they said no operation conId hel .

en he heard that, ommy cried;Dadd told her agaio "It's up to God no .Let lea e it .th Him." Mommy said shekn that-but she onId fight to the lastditch to help me until You called for me. Ofcour e, she as still lighting herself....

I'm glad they had to go on that tour­glad they had to go out and entertain people,because bile they were so busy makingtho e other people happy they wouldn'tworry about me. Up Here we know that if

·24· ANGEL UNA WARB ·25-

e want to be happy we have to make othershapp ; Do n There, they ha en't quitecaught up with that idea. But they will.

I goes ommy would have collapsed if ithadn't been for that rule that " th showmust go on. ,.

They called every night bile they werea ay; 1:ommy as overjoyed the night Jotold her that I had "laughed right: outloud," that day. E erybody in the hoo elaughed .th me, they ere so glad-myaunt and grandparents and brother andsister and Ginny, Dusty's nurse, and our nicehousekeeper Emil . They were good to me-so good that sometimes I got to wishingmy mission conId go on a little longer. But

cry time that happened--every time I got"earth-minded ' '-I would start thinking ofYoo, and of ho nice it as p Here. That

a hen they said I had "a far-a y look"in my eyes, and they'd try to snap me out ofit. It U't1! a far-a ay look; I was seeing thingsth Y conIdn' t see, and I pitied them. Someday they'll know; some day they'll seecl arly, instead of in their misty mirrors.

They loved me, all of them, and maybewhen I laughed it was in joy and thankful-

.26. A GEL

ness for their love. They weren't ashamed oftheir little "borderline" ongoloid! lotof parents are, ou know. They hisk themoff somewhere to keep them hidden, soothers won't know. That's pard becauset ey ant to shelter these children from theey s of the curious people, and partly it'sbecause of their own pride.

Pride I I got so sick of that, Down There.It's an ugly weed, Father, growing all 0 erthe place. And there's nothing like ha ing ahandicapped child to strip the pride and pre­tense from a pair of parents. I guess it' allright for a father to throw out his chest and

ast about how sman his bo Jim is, butit's wrong hen he tries to end thanks UpHere because his children are JUSt a littlebetter than an other children. It's reallygood when You. send a handicapped baby topeople like that;. it takes them down a pegor twO, and their teal character begins to

show, and they begin to be the kind ofpeopleYou want them to be.

Mommy and Daddy went to one of thefinest medical clinics in the orId, duringthis our and they showed the top man mypicture, and told him what the oth r doctors

U ARB ·n·had said. He took-one 100~ and asked, "Isshe a good baby?"

"Oh, yes '" said Mommy.(lAnd is she always in a relaxed position,

like this picmre sho s?'.. 0 t of the time, yes.""Then you have a real problem," he said.

"There's absolutely nmhing e can d<r-forthe heart, or for anything e1 e. Thsre i.r 1UJ

help."He told Mommy that this a.ffliction was no

respecter of persons, that it .ts an" here,any time. One of his friends, a top babydoctor, ~d a baby just like me. He advised

ommy to put me in a home, before herheart broke.

Mommy wouldn't listen to it. I'm gladshe didn't, because if she had,s e and Daddymight have missed our point completely.

THE D Y before they got home, Jo got a"virus," and had to lea em. Daddy andMommy came "on the double," scared halfont of their wits that 1'd get the virus, too,and they staned hunting for a ne nur e.They had to record another radio broadcastthat week, so You can imagine the confusion

·28· ANGEL UNA WARD ·29·around the house. Mommy called doctors.hospitals, nurses ageocies---everytrung, andno nurse could be found, for love or money.They were really scared, for I was hard tofeed, and my head seemed more wobbly tbanever. But they found a nurse. Funny. iso't it,bow things always work out. Down There?People fall all over themselves while You'reworking it Qut. . . .

Art Rush (that's Daddy's manager, re­member?) called up and said he knew a ladywho could help me. They sent fat her, andshe came and talked to Mommy and told herI could he healed, uo matter what the dac­rots said-that God could do that. She saidshe knew a nurse who would take me. butMommy would have to consent to havingme live at the nurse's house for a few months-where she wouldn't luve to contend withMommy's fearful thoughts about me. Shesaid that babies felt fear. that Mommy wasputting her fear into me. and that wouldhold me back.

You can imagine what Mommy said. NO!A big, loud, furious NO! She sat down andbegan telephoning all over, looking Ior an­other nurse. Of course she didn't find one.

She wasn't supposed to, according to thePlan....

Finally she said, "Oh, all right. But thisnurse will have to spend a few days at ourhouse first, so we can see how she and Robinget along."

So the new nurse came; I called her"Cau-Gu," and she took charge of me justlike she'd knowu me all my life. Mommyrelaxed. and let me go.

Cau-Cau knew her business with babies.She told ~{ommy I wasn't really her child;I was God's child. She said I was wi th Youbefore I came to ber, and that Mommyshould be glad to give me back to You, andthat You'd take care of me.

The lady who got this nnrse fat Mommysaid the same thing; and she said thatMommy should never think of me as an im­perfect child, but as a child perfect in YODteyes.

They were pact of the Plan, all right. Theywere doing just what You sent them to do.

I SB.AllED a nice sunny room with Cau-Cau.in her home, and I began to feel better. I wasstronger, and while I couldn't sit up, my

head was steadier, and I was begin.ning totake some inter t in things around me. But

I was still pretty nervous; whene er anyonerai ed his oice, I started to cry. Any noisebothered me.

Father it's so noi.sy Down There. So muchbabble and silly racket. What are they cry­ing to do, anyway? Are they noisy becauseth y Ie afraid of something, or hat?

They worried ahoQ.t my "coordination,"which certainly wasn't too good. From thetime I b gan to notic bright objects, th y

ould try to tnake me pick up rattles andtoys. You should ha e heard ommy theda she was writing down a telephone num­ber, and I grabbed the pencil ant of herhand, and started scribbling all over thenotebook. Right a ay, she got me crayonsand a big drawing book, to encourage me.

e bubbled 0 er e err time I showed theleast sign of improv ment. She was stillhoping....

Can-Can used to say that I had "suchloving hands . . . always stretched out togi e ... not earthly, grasping hands, andthat's heavenly'" Of course, my hands were

loving. They ere filled with Your love, soey could bless those around me.She and ommy ere orried about my

little narrow foot. Cau-Can said they wouldh.ave to ha e my shoes "specially made." Ib d to choke down a giggle, hecau e UpHere we doo't need "specially made shoes"at all. Matter of fact, e don't need any­thing. Here. What a blessing that is!

Humans worry too much. H they cooldsomehow trust more and worry less, they'dha e hea. en on earth, wouldn't they? Iwanted to talk to them about that, andsometimes I got so anxious about it thatI ould stan to jabber, a mile a minute.They ould stare at me, and try to under­stand w at I as trying to say, and-forgiveme, ather, but I'm afraid I lost my patience

.th them. You know I 10 ed them, and Iwanted to have them understand, and I hatedto see them groping.

Mommy used to hold me on her lap tolisten to a. religious program on the radio;I heard her whisper that she hoped I'd"somehow understand." Poor hean-if sheonly knew how much I understood r

It seemed like everyhody came OUt to see me

__.......~_ _:-:c_.;-;;;;:::=====---;:~ _

·30· A GEL .AWAR.B '31·

'WAR ·33·

on my" first Christmas. omm brought ma doll in a bright red dr s , and I 10 ed it.My grandfather and grandmother and myuncle came, too, and there were my greatbig grown-up brother Tom, and his ue,Barbara. He had the kind st eyes; I lookedin tho eyes and saw au.

They all phyed 'V ith me until I got prettytired, and start d to perspire, and nurse saidthey'd better go. They all had tears in theireye.s hen they left, and I anted to cheerthem up. I wanted to sa , •'Thi is Chrisr­IruLS. a d you honld be gla.d. The angelssang for the Babe in the manger, and they'resinging for me. Can't you hear it? Litten."But my balky old tongue wouldn't be­have....

Mommy came to see me almost e ery day.and I don't think Cau-Cau appro ed of th.a.tbut she couldn't do anything about it.Mommy said she intended to see me hen­ever she had the chance. And she said ourfamily was moving out to a ranch at Encino,in the alley, and she wa going to build alittle house for me and Cau-<:au. beca e she

anted me at home.Cau-Cau said he'd come, "for a little

hile, uneil Robin gets us to livin withall those opl" and Da.ddy and Grampyand my great uncle started building it rightaway....

I .AS ten months old when e moved intothat bon e. It as pretty, 'th a roomsand a bath; my roo was blue like my eyes,and there were frilly white curtains at thewindows. It made you happy just to look atit.

The new ranch was really something.Dadd had lots of dogs an Cau-Cau ould

heel me out in m go-cart to see them.And ther were chickens and ducks andhorses and even little faxes and raccoons. 1gOt to know one dog real well; her name wasLana, and hen I as frett or nervou he'dcome up nd nuzzle me with her cold nose,and I'd feel better. Her fur as a oft grayCOIOf. like a do e's, and she had long silkyears that I couldn't help pulling wheneverI got my hands on them. Lana didn't mind.Everywher I went, he followed me.

Funn about that. Children and animalsDo n There get along fine. They sort of calkto each other. . . .

.........,'"'-................u..........- ------------------------

·34· ANGBL UNAWARE ·35'

We had some geese, and were they a Jloisybunch! They lnade a queer Illssing soundwhenever we came near them, and I learnedto make it, tOO; Cau-eau thought that wassmart of me, and she told me so. Some da.ysCau-eau would give me a piece of stale breadto feed the chickens, or we'd take a walkover to the next ranch where there was agentle old horse I loved, and I'd pac Ills nose,and he'd wh.inny back co me in horse lan­guage.

Cau-Cau read animal books to me at meal­time. That way, I got through the meals.They were hard to take, Father. I nevercared much for solid food, and they playedall sorts of tricks on me to get me to eat it.Finally they gOt me a suction-bottom pla.teand a specWly curved spoon, hoping I mightfind my mouth with it. Every now and then,I did I It was an awful bore, and I got it overwith as quickly as possible. It was easier inthe mornings, when I was hungry; I was socranky then that Cau-Cau called me "animpatient little witch." She was right. Iwas.

When I was bored I'd cry. Mommycouldn't stand that; she was afraid it would

affect my weak heart. But Daddy said it wasnormal, or ..O.K .... for a baby to cry.

My head was a little more "normal" now;I could control it a little better, and I wasdoing better with my tongue, too. And mylegs! I could do things with my legs. Fromthe time I was sL"{ months old I could liftthem up str.light over my head, and throwthem out sideways-"doing the splits,"Daddy called it. The doctor was afraid I'dthrow my hips out of joint doing the splits,so he put a brace between my feet. I knowthis was supposed to keep me from hurtingmyself, but how I hated that brace I It mademe more nervous than ever. I had to wearthat brace constantly during the last fourmonths I was Down There, and it wasn't fuo.

They kept praying for me. You know,Father. thousamls of people. scattered allover the country. prayed for me. One way oranother. they heard about me, and theytalked to You about me. Once, the wholebig Southern Baptist Convention. in SanFrancisco, prayed. Didn't You like thatl

They had "round rabIe" prayers in thehome, and it pleased me so that I JUStcouldn't keep quiet. I uied to say the words

with them, but the words got all mixed up.But they never scolded me. Seems as thoughthey knew all along I was an angel....

After d.i.nner, Mommy would take me tothe big piano and lot me play. I tried hatdto say "play piano," but it wouldn't come,and the best I could say was "pah-pah."Mommy would play and sing for me, and Iused to take her hand and make her playsome more; then Cau-Cau would say "Bedtime''', and I'd throw them all a kiss, andnurse and Mommy tucked me in. I alwaysbated to leave that piano.

Maybe I'm talking too much about my­self, and Dot enough about what was hap­pening to Mommy and Daddy. I could seethat they were "growing in grace." I heardMommy say one day that she was coming tobelieve that the only important thing in thisworld was a person's reJationship to Godand his faith in Jesus Christ. Then she saidshe was actUally grateful to You for sendingme in my handicapped condition, because Ihad made her walk closer to You. She wasalways reading her Bible. and when she weD[off with Daddy to San Francisco to testifyto Your love in that big convention, I was

proud of them. They were not JUSt talking;they were practicing.

And Daddyl He was more and more in­terested in Jjck children, and he tried to getto see every sick boy or girl who called [orhim. They loved him. He wnre a big whitecowboy hat with a silver band on it-I usedto put it on and play peek-a-boo with him.He got to calling me "Little AngeJ"-andI knew then that he knew.

MOMMY AND DADDY worked hatd. They leftus for two whole weeks, to go "on location"for a series of television pictures; Daddy badan accident while be was riding horseback,a.nd we even heard that he'd been killed. Ofcourse he waso't, but it upset everybody for.1 little. Down There. Father. bad news trav­els twice as fast as good news. Why is that?Shouldn't it be the other way 'round?

They were busy making motion picturesfrom sunrise to sunset-so busy that I won­dered whether it was worth their while.Why work so hard just to make a. littlemoney, and tben die?

Then one day I overheard Mommy saysomething about their work that I hadn't

·36· ANGBL r UNAWARE ·37'

-38- ANGEL UNAWARB -39-

heard them ever say before: she said thatif they could get Your message to people,especially to young people, through theirmovies and television and rodeos-if theycould just get in a good word for You thisway, it was worth all the hard work. And Iwatched that idea grow and grow and growin their hearts, all during Our mission.

My first earth birthday came along, andwe had a great party. Everybody gave methe nicest presents. I had a cake, and Mommyhad a photographer come QUt and take mypicture. The present I liked best was a pic­ture ofJesus holding a little blond girl in Hisarms, and mothers holding their babies upfor You to bless. It made me so homesick!Mommy hung it at the head of my bed, sothat I could see it before going to sleep, andthe first thing in the morning when I wokeup. She tried to teach me to say "Jesus." butall I could get out was "tay-tay."

Cau-Cau gave me a wonderful present. andshe never knew it. She told Mommy that ofall the babies she had nursed, she loved memost> because I needed her most. and she saidI was teaching her to be patient. I laughed

and kicked my feet when she said that; I sawthe lessons soaking in> all around.

I WAS STANDING up most of the time> rightthen, in nurse's lap, and everybody was sohappy about it. But aU of a sudden I wasawfully sick, and it looked for awhile asthough my mission was over. I had a"convulsion"; it took me a long time to getover that and when I did, my legs wouldn'thold me up. I couldn't stand up any more.

Mommy and Daddy were sad about that­but they kept right on, as though nothinghad happened. At Christmas we had the hap­piest party (this was my second Christmas);that was when I got my little red piano.Mommy and Daddy went to a midnight serv­ice to thank You for sending me.

Sometimes, it seemed that every day wasChristmas, at least to me. They would sit meup in the middle of a big play table and letme roll a lot of brightly-colored baUs around;I could throw them, Daddy said, --like a bigleague pitcher." Even when they took me tothe "orthopedic" place, to have my "physi­cal therapy, t, I had fun; I would take a rounddisk and fit it over a rounded piece of wood,

·40· ANGBL UNAWARB ·41·and Mommy would play "catch" with thedisks and do all sorts of ,hings to keep meinterested J so I would tty co stand up. I gOt

so I could scand lor five whole minUtes.Cheryl, my oldest sister, played the piano.

She had studied only a few months. but shecould play almost anything at first sight. Iloved to sit on her lap while she played fast,happy music. It would excite me so muchthat I'd grab her hands to make her playfaster....

They all laughed at me wben I watchedthe ice shrers 00 television; I'd sway withthem. and when the skaters came up doseon the screen, I'd wave to them. It was alldone silently-but what voices there were inthat silence, for mel

Emily, our housekeeper. laughed over thewrist watch business. I had it weakness forwrist watches, and when Emily would say."What time is it. Robin?" I'd hold up my\wist co her, just like I was wearing Doe.

Emily played peek-a-boo with me, over hercoffee cup. She seemed to see something,deep. in me. ...

WELL. Spring came, nice and warm, and with

Spring came Nancy. Yon know Nancy­she's Your other little angel who lives nearus. She's tea now. and going suong on hnmission. She's had thirty-five operations onher legs, but oh. Father. how happy she is,and bow happy sbes made the people aroundherl \Vhen I saw ber. I saw You again. andI felt all warm and good inside. Nancy hasJifted her own mother up for a new freshlook into beaven---=d she has helped liftmy own Mommy, too.

I was so glad to learn that You had intro­duced ancy to Mommy befo~ I got there;sbed been a "fau" ofMommy's and Daddy'sfor some time, and a good friend ofmy sisters.Linda and Cheryl. Nancy's mother looked atme and she said, "Robin is straight fromheaven. I see it in her eyes-just as I see it inNancy·s."

She told Mommy that I bad a great workto do Down There, and that she and Daddywere Jucky to have a part in that work. SheaJso toJd Mommy about a dOCtOr "up DOnb"

who had belped lirtle children like me, andMommy said she'd take Cau-Cau and me tosee him just as soon as they gOt back froma rodeo engagement in Houston, Texas.

·42· ANGEL UN"AWARE ·43·flut (J.l SfJon as they got back. They knew I'd

be thete when they got hack.They had me ..christeDed" befoee they

left for Houston. because co Mommy, rightat this particular time, it seemed. more im­portant than anything else in the world tohave me dedicated to You. So they madearrangements with the minister. dressed meup in a white oegaody deess (fiefoe ao aogell)with a pink sash, and some new white shoes.and Cau-Cau curled my hair and put aribbon on my "tOpknOt" (a sort of halo,You know), and away we went.

Art Rush was there; he said he wouldn'tmiss thi! for anything. And nurse wentalong, too. I think I got the greatest thrillof all when the minister reached out andcook me in his arms. Mommy gave me tohim so gladly; she seemed to be saying in herheart•• 'Here she is, God. I give her to You. Iwon't fight any more;! won't try to keep herso much to myseU. She's Yours. Take hee."

The minister took me in his arms and heldme, and I looked up intO tbat kind. patient,loving face and saw You again. Mommy andDaddy were so happy about it tbat I knewthey knew You were standingtberewith them.

Then Mommy and Daddy went off to theHouston rodeo--and what a show thatturned out to bel You know, Daddy comestearing out intO the arena on Trigger, andthe kids all shout aDd howl aod cheer, aodtheu Daddy talks to them. He tells themnever to get the idea in their litde headsthat there's anything sissy about going toSunday school and church. He'll ask, "Nowlet's give a big hand to everybody who'sgoing to church on Sunday I" In a. rod4o,Father! Rodeo's are supposed to be tough.aud wild aDd wool!y. Daddy makes themsomething a lot finer than that.

Even in that big Madison Square Garden,in New York City. he gets down off Triggerand sings a song about Peace, and it's soquiet You can hear a pin drop. even thoughYou're way off Up Here in heaven. Theyreally listen when Daddy sings about "Peacein the Valley":

Oh, I'm tired and I'm weary, but I musttravel on

Till the Lord comes and calls me. calls meaway.

Where the morning is bright, and the Lambis the light,

ANGEL UNAWARB ·45·

And the night is as fair as the da.y.There will be peace in the Valley for me,. . . peace in the Valley for me.

I wonder if Daddy is thinking of his peace,or mine, when he sings that?

There's DO sadness, DO sorrow, no troubleI seel

There'il be peace in the Valley for me!

No sadness, no sorrowl No crippled children,Father!

There the bear will be gentle and the wolfwill be tame

And the lion will lie down with the lamb;There the host from the wild will be led by

a child ...

A child like "". Father?

And I'll be changed from this creature thatlam.

Mommy said Daddy had never sung thatsong so beautifully as he sang it in Houston,and Daddy saiJ thAt was because it was Yoursong, not his, and that You were helpinghim sing it. He had peace-perfect peace. He

•

and Mommy went to a big church in Hous­ton on Sunday> and told the folks about it .

They were coming along, Father.

\VB GOT ltEADy to go to see the doctor upnorth-in San Francisco. Just before we left,Mommy took me to a "hean specialist," to

see what he would say about that trickyhean: of mine. It wasn't that she was lookingfor miracles to happen, Father; it was JUStthat she thought she should do everything to

help me, and she thought that it might heYour will to reach down to me throughsome doctOr's hand, and make it easier forme.

But-no. That wasn't the way it was tobe. The doctor said my hean was alreadyenlarged. seriously. and that they couldn'tpossibly operate. By the end of the summer,he said, that condition would be "impor­tant>" and they were to bring me to himagain.

Mommy asked this doctor aboue the doc­tor in Sao Francisco, and he said, "I hate tosee you go 00 chasing rainbows like this,but 1 know you will, so go ahead." We wentahead .

We had a room high up in a hotel, andthey had one of those "air raid warnings"while we were there, and I'll never Ioeger it.1 thought those whistles would burst my eardrums. How they do make noise, and howpeople do scamper around like a lot offright­ened ants! I just couldn't understand it.Maybe you can explain it to me hter, Father.Why do chey act like that, Down There? It'sso foolish to go OUt ofyour way to get scared.and to create confusion. I listened to thewhistles and the shouting, and I thought ofDaddy singing Your song about Peace, andI asked myself, "What's wrong Down Here,anywayl Why don't they JUSt get Yourpeace?" Nobody seemed to know. They justwent on. ...

The doctor was a kind man, and he wasvery honest with Mommy. He said he mighthelp my "muscle-tone" with a powder takenfrom "the picuinrry gland of a young calf."(Those doctors use such hit, wordsQ 1 was to

take Doe C2psule a day, plus a tonic of"B-12," to increase my appetite. He said thatthat would help.

But my heare, he was sure, couldn't behelped. He said he believed that when I was

·46· ANOBL UNAWARE .47.

horn, a few of the hean cells didn't closeproperly, and Jeh a hole. T1uee or {ourmonths o{ the piruinrry gland extract migh,help me to get up on my feet and walk, butmy heart-no.

Mommy took me out in the city squ.ue [Q

see the pigeons. Ah, that was goocll I lovedto see them leap up into the a.ir so faSt. andspread their wings. and glide all around. soh.igh up, wild and free and beautiful, againstthe deep hlue of the sky and the hig whi'efleecy clouds. I reathed out my hands totouth them up there, and I thought, "Howwonderful it will be when I get my wingshack ..."

Sorry, Father. I guess I was getting a littleimpatient.

A:FTEll we gOt borne, Mommy decided it wastime for Cau-Cau to take a little vacation;she needed it. for she'd been with me sinceI was {our months old. Mommy had threeweek's rest now, from her television work.so she could uke eate of me, all hy herself.She figured she and I would have a wonderfultime together. in those three weeks . ..and we didl

au regarding me. he al ay said, "1 willhen the time comes. It Unconsciously, she

was waiting for Your will to be done. Sheas waiting to see whether I'd he healed

Down There or Up Here-wether I as to

£..cd my joy on eart or in heaven. It wasright that he should wait, for now that I'veleft earth, he has a great chance to tell agreat story about-Us.

Before long, it was Easter. That's a greattime, Down There. They "dress up" spe­cia.lly for the Easter service at church, and

ople go to church then e en if they don'tgo an other rime, and I guess that's good,isn't if? Th y go all eek long before Ea terSunday, too, to celebrate the Crucifudon andthe Resurrection, and there i something realholy about Holy Week. It seems so sad onGood. Friday, and then suddenly it's sobright and glorious 00 Easter, hen ourSon ro e from the d d. Some of the peopleare pretty eedless about it, but the meaningof etemallife gets hold of them, and they'requieter, and better. I think that idea-thatI'd go on living in a better condition than I

as in eD, and that everything auldork out all right-I think that idea as

·48· A "'GEL

It was hard for her because my brothersand sisters needed her, too, but she made outall right. She sang to me a lot, during thosethree weeks, and she told me often that Ibelonged to You. And she prayed. I'd neverheard her pra like that, before. One day shesaid to au:

"God, i it Your purpose to heal my b~by?

H it is, I"ll use that healing to Your glory,and all the rest of my life I'll tell peopleabout it, everywhere I go.

"But if that isn't Your will, and whatau want, then gi e me strength to meet it,

Lord. ttength to face the future and tofinish hat Robin has started in all ourhearts in this house, strength to get herMessage across to the world. Just strength,Lord, for whatever You ha e decided."

Sometimes, she auld beg You please tolet her sea on earth until ou had calledme Home so she could atch a er me. Thatthought seemed to haunt her; it was in herheart, like a sharp knife. The idea of mybeing alone, without her, ~de her almostrerr.ified.

Maoy times, ommy as asked to writeanicles for the "magazines," on her faith in

A. .ARB ·49·

strong in Mommy aod Daddy aod in thewhole f>,mily, Wt LIse Easeee I had DownThere.

Mommy wheeled me oue in my "gocarc,"to watch Checyl and Linda aod Dusty huntIor Easrer eggs. The "hunny" was supposedto have left thecn-wd Daddy looked at meaod said I looked just like the hunny, be­cause my knitted cap w·as white with bigears on the sides. He gOt that camera out

. Iagam . . . .It was warm now, and Mommy would

take me inco the $,hallow pan of our swim­ming pool. That water was wonderful.Mommy would bold my arms around herneck, aod I'd kitk out, like a little frog,spattering water all over Can-Cau. Shedjdn'cmind. She loved me. I heard hee say manytimes. "God is good to have made her sobe tifuJ "au .

BeautifuJ? I guess I was, although when Iwas born nobody would have thought it,except maybe my parents. Isn't it funny,Father, that the /irst thing people worriedabout was my slanted eyes-and by the timeI was a year old they were saying. "Hasn'tshe beautiful eyes?" It's like You say, "All

·50' ANGEL

•

UNAWARE .51.

things shall be chaoged." Even ugly thingshave a way ofchanging into beautiful things,under Your hand.

None told us Wt a friend had said to her,"Never admit that her condition was diag­nosed as Mongoloid. because even if sheturns out all right, people will Dever giveher a chance." But-I was chmz[.tJ, and ncrbody was thinJcing of me as "Mongoloid,"hut JUSt as a beautiful child. They wouldlook at me and say, "She's a doll," or,"She's like a lhtle hird ... Robin cerrainlywas the name [or her."

Mommy named me Elizabeth-1!.fter Johuthe Baptist'S mother-a.nd Robin, mer apretty little Chinese singer [hey met once,and when I 'was born the li[tie Chinese girl,ovas so pleased that she sent me the S'\veetestlittle Chinese pajamas aod slippecs. Too badwe never met.

Spealcing of Wt name, Rohin, aod birds,... whenevee I heard hright aod sparklingmwic, like birds singing, I would forgetmyselI aod tty to fly I I missed my wings somuch on eanh, and I was so disappointedwhen I would nap my arms, and get nowhere.

But it was good, even though I had no

wings, Some of them didn't know how goodit was. Mommy heard once that some doctorhad said that babies who came into thewotld in my condition should be lined up ina row and "machine-gunned," because theywere DO good to themselves or to a.nybodyelse, Father, if chat rematle was really made,forgive him, for be knows oOt whAt he'ssaying. I wish he could meet You... ,

BEFORE Cau-Cau came back from her vaca­tion. Mommy, Daddy, and Dusty took mehack to see the San Francisco doctor. Thatttip was a "pistol," as Daddy says. Wasthere ttOuhlel

They put me in a "lower berth," in mybed-suap, and Dusty was in the berth aboveme. Mommy slept in the.bed right acrossfrom me, and Daddy was in the bunk abovehers. I was pcetty restless during the night,but as soon as I had my brealdast, thingsquieted down. Dusty and I had fun lookingout of the window at northern California;his eyes were as big as saucers.

A minister friend of Daddy's met us at thesution, and he took Dusty off for a ride 00

the "cable cars," and they took me to the

'52, ANGBL UNAWARB .~.

hotel. I didn't do so well-I was nervous,and the hotel noises and the taxicab hornskept me from sleeping, and I had anothet"spell." The night after we saw the doctor,I kept my patents up all night.

They took: roms wa.llci.ng me op and downthe room. Finally, Daddy lay down on hisbed, exh2usted; he pUt me on his chest andpatced my back and sang to me and mumbledwords, trying to comfort me. Early in the

morning my cemperature shot up, and theysent [oe the doctor; he gave me a shot of"penicillin:' and something to put me tosleep.

On the uain going home, Mommy was upseven times in the night. I was sure gladto get back to my own little bed, in Encino.Mommy and Daddy were there. tOO; theywere so quieti The doctor told them that my"muscle cone" was better, but that my heartwas getting worse.

My muscles Wffl stronger. I could tuen overin my bed, and I could even get on my handsand knees and hold myself in a crawling p0­

sition. I had eighc big teeth and I could chewcrackers, which I called "cack-ock." (You

·54· ANGEL UNAWARE ·55'see. my tongue was under better concrol,too.)

I bad always bad trouble trying to boldup my milk bottle. It was so heavy. Momm}rand Ginny got a little perfume bottle, steri­lized it and put a nipple on it, and it was solight that I could hold it in my own handsand drain it dry. Of course. my bones weretiny and weak, and there was still we softspot on my head, which hadn't quite closed.I was tired most of the time, and they haduouble waking me up after my naps in theafternoon. I weighed seventeen pounds, fiveounces-not much for a baby nearly twoyears old I

Cau-Cau took a day a week off now (sheneeded it!), and on tbe days when Mommywas working, I was alone with Ginny andDusty. \Ve had a great time, playing aroundon tbe Iloor of my house. Dusty would hideunder my bed. and tease me. He was myfavorite; while I couldo't talk to him, wealways sort of knew what we"were trying CO

say to each other. There was kind of a sparkbetween us, Father. if You know what Imean.

Mommy never forgot what they told her

when I was born-that I couldn't live verylong. She was so anxious to be with me dur­ing the time I was on eanh that she refusedto fly in airplanes, on their trips. She wasafraid she might "crash;' and from the dayI was born she had not put her foot in a

plane. You put her to quite a test, with thatflying business.

There were some big religious meetinybeing held down in Houston, Texas, andMommy and Daddy were asked. to come andspeak. Daddy went, but Mommy was a.&aid---afraid to fly. and she had to fly to get thereon time. She let Daddy go. and she tossed illnigbt in ber bed, and in ber sleep sbe beardYou asking ber, "Which comes first-Robinor Me?" It was a hard decision to make.

In the moming, sbe leaped out of bed andcalled the airport and .ma.de a reservation.and went off to Houston. I think that wastbe greatest ,ricrory of all. on my wholemission-helping Mommy conquer jeof. Shewas never afraid to go where You sent her.after that. She knew it was more importantto tell tbe world about what You were doingfor her and for me. than to stay in my roomnigbt aod day.

·56· ANGEL UNAWARE

She flew down to Texas again, shortlyafter this, to see my grandfather I who wassick. While she was there, You did it again:You led her out to a babies' home calledHope Cottage, in Dallas, where You hadlittle Mary waiting to take my place.Mommy saw :Mary while she was walkingaround the cottage-a little black-eyed baby,with blacker hair, who raised herself up onher elbows and watched Mommy walkaround the room. She never took her eyes offMommy; it was as though she were sayingto herself, "WeIll At last, you've come!"Mommy couldn't take her eyes off Mary,either. Mommy found out that :M:ary waspart Choctaw Indian, and that struck aspark. Daddy was part Choctaw Indian, tool

Mommy came back and told Daddy shesure hoped th>.t little baby would nod a' goodhome, with somebody, and I almost laughedOllt loud. I knew all about the home she wasgoing to find: it was part of the Plan.

Mary's with them now, Father. I wish Icould go Down There again, and visit them.I'd like to see Mommy happy again, like shewas the day I got my fitst tooth. I think I'llsend word down to them to change Mary's

•

name to "Doe"; there's something Choctawabout "Doe."

Daddy said he knew Dusty would likehaving Mary-ot Doe-around, becauseDusty was getting tired of being the young­est in the family-of being "low man on thetotem pole" in our family. It will be goodfor Dusty, all right. He is "all boy aod fullof vinegar," but he was kind and tenderwjchYour Littlest Angel-meaning me. It wassomething, just to watch him go out of hisway, more and more, to help me.

I saw that thoughtfulness developing inall the children in "the house of Rogers."On my birthday, Dusty took one of his besttoys and wra.pped it up in nice tissue paper,and gave it to me. Linda prayed for me. Shesaid the grace at meals. and the grace alwaysincluded something about me. The night Ileft to come back Up Here, Linda went toMommy and said, "I prayed for Robin inChurch this morning," and that gaveMommy a great lifr. And she was alwayspraying for Nancy, too.

Take good care of Linda, won't you,Father? She's so unselfish; she wants to be anurse when she grows up, so she can help

Everybody was uneasy. and restless. Cau­Cau worried over my fajlure to walk. Sheworked so hard with me, exercjsing my legs.and when the "orthopedjc" man told her itwould be at least six months mace before Icould walk, she almost cried. Mommydecided Cau-uu had had eoough, aDd thatshe should leave me, for her own sake.

They both cried when Cau-Cau went away.Poor Cau-uu kept rubbing my legs until thevery day she left us. I wanted so to tell hernever to mind. that I would soon be usingwings instead ofmy poor feet, but I couldn·t.It was awful, Father, seeing her turn awayfrom me for the last time, but I'm glad nowthat she went. That laSt night would havebeen just tOO hard for her.

The othet children, all of a sudden, got themumps-and so did I! One side of my faceswelled up and then went down, and thenthe other side swelled up. much worse, andbefore anybody couId do anything, the feverhit my brain.

Two doctors came and worked hard overme; they did their beSt. but of course itwasn't any good. Late Saturday afternoonthey took my temperature; it was 106.

·58· ANGBL

people-people like me. Cheryl is sweet, too;she wants to be an actress. bue Mommywants her to be a. good Christian first. andMommy knows that being an actress is adangerous business. There are so many pit­falls. But I think Cheryl will make it, allright. She's gOt what it takes-You.

I was sorry to leave them. as I watchedthem becoming more and more unselfish,and doing more and more for people whowere weaker than they were. We did quitea job on those children, Fa ther; they learneda great lesson, and they'll never forget it,

WELL, we're getting near tbe end of mystory.

Things began to happen fast. Mommy andDaddy had to go to New York, to appearin a rodeo, aod they dreaded that, becauseit meant leaving me, and I was getting nobetter. Mommy was in such a troubled scateof mind tha t she could.n· t settle down togetting her songs ready for the show, and shekept worrying about me and about Cau-Cau,who was tired out. What should she do? Goto New York? Let Cau-Cau go, and stay withme night and day herself? Or what?

UNAWARB '59·

•

ommy called in one of the doctO 'hohad been in the ho it3l me da I was born,and he gave me medicine to kill the ain,and he told Mommy that I cried so beau eI had a terrific headache.

Mommy and Daddy walked up and dowD,up and down, out ide my little house. Daddysaid, "God will call her hen He's ready.

e' e just got to trUSt Him." The doctorcame out and told them that I 'ght go in amatter of seconds DOW. My kindofhean ga eno warning, and they mu·t be ready. . . .

He told Mommy that she and Daddy haddone the right thing in keeping me at homeloving me like they had. His own wifi wasgoing to have a little baby oon. he aid,and if it ere a aby like me he auld dothe e thing.

Babie like me must have left their markon him for he aid something You mustlove, ather, he said that he was goingto theological school to equip himself,spiritually. so that he could be of more h Ipto the parents of other probl babie likem. e reall h lped him, dido'r e? B ingwith me will make him a bett r doctOr .. imevery patient he ha from no on! It's good

,60· G L A ARB ,61.

he didn't want to ·'.IDa.chine-gun" me, likethat other doctor I

Late unday afternoon, my fever a 108;the doctor told Mommy that I had "mumpsencephalitis," and that it was a bad develop­ment. Only one child out of nine developedenc halitis, and it was ery. ery danger­ous. He dido t gi e them much hope that 1'dreco er from it.

Pan of the time hen I a consciou I,could see them dimly, all around me, a t

of the time I was reaching up for Your arms.Father, for I knew You were very near now,I knew You were coming.

Mommy came in and kis ed my hand, andshe noticed the funny, rattling ay Ibreathing; she looked grief- tricken,there was a sort of peace on her faceshe turned and ent out on the porch.

y special pal, the dog, Lana, was outthere. She kept walking up and down, upand down, restles ly, and then she began tobark. loud and insistently. Lana e!10mm, patted her while she praJed a

pra ter of thanks i -ing to You for letting mesea a rear. Just as Daddy met her on meporch and she nt crying into his arms,

You came and I felt myself being lifted up.What a mom nt that was! Everything was

bright wi h lig c, and there wa a sound likethe rusclin of a million angel's ings, andthere a singing e here. y old ciaJshell jut feU off an m heart began beatingstrong and sceady, and my head didn't hurtan more.~ ell thac s it, Father. That's what hap­

pened Do n There. That' ho I deli eredour me age, and I'm ure they goeit. The

learned, for one thing thac there are manmansions or "room," in Your earthlhouse--that cher' a room for the scronand a room for the sick, a room fot' thehealthy and a room for the eak, a room fortho e born v .th ten talent , and a room forthose with onl one, a room for the rich anda room for the poor. A room for everyoneand something for them co do in that roomfor You. In our house Down There aremany rooms, here we study and teach andget ready to move into Your big light roomUp Here.

We did pretty well in that room in mylittle house, Father. We taught them to seepurpose in pain, and messages on the crosses

·62· A GEL AWARE .~.

chey have to carry around. You know, whenDaddy sing now in his big rodeo show hehas a lot of big spotlights making a ero inthe centre of the arena. It's sort of a symbolof hat's happened to him and co ommy;the cros ha become the great big thing inthe middle of their lives. E erything else intheir lives no sore of mo es around it, likea heel around a hub.

Th y're a lot stronger, inee they gOt Ourme age. There's a new glory in ide theman 00 everything all around them, andthey' e made up their minds to gi e it coe erybody theymeet. The un's aloe brighterin Encino, inee we stopped off there fora bile.

d now, Father, please . could I justgo OUt aod try my wings?

(Continued from front flap)

It is a story to be read - and

cherished - not only by the countless

youthful admirers of Dale Evans and

Roy Rogers, but by mature people of

all ages as well.

Unique in both style and approach,

the story is told just as Robin told it

to ber Heavenly Father after her brief

sojourn on earth.

It is a story of faith and courage,

revealing Dale Evans' and Roy Rogers'

triumph over one of life's most chal­

lenging experiences.

..Mn. 'Rogers is cOfl1l'ibllling all royalties

from the sale of Ihis book fo Ihe Nali01/tll

Associatioll for Retarded Children,

565 Hale Avemle, Cillci""'lti 29, Ohio,

1!i

m' ~'e'If;'~'iti:'~:;t;:~'e"If;'o'~:;t;:~'~_~':;t;:~'..;,~~~( THE purity, the sweetness, the touching humor, '~ the deep spiritual understanding with which the ~~. little girl talks with God in this book will comfon .:~ and strengthen all who read it. as it did me when5ti I read the manuscript-through misty eyes. :

~ This is one book I'll never forget! ,

~ NORMAN VINCENT PEA.LE ~

m~~~~ ~*:!f.: