Next steps

• Generating ideas

• Gathering information

• Narrowing the information

• Outlining

Generating ideas

How might you generate ideas?

“What people somehow (inadvertently, I’m sure) forgot to mention…was that we need to make messes in order to find out who we are and why we are here—and, by extension, what we’re supposed to be writing.” (Anne Lamott, Bird by Bird)

Gathering & narrowing information

How might you gather information?

How might you narrow the information?

Outlining

1. Write an outline (or at least a list).

2. Start with a standard template and modify.

3. Add as much detail as you comfortably can.

4. Don’t etch it in stone.

Scientific proposal template

1. Significance and objectivesa. Significance and motivationb. Objectivesc. Hypothesesd. Summary of proposed work

2. Backgrounda. Introductionb. Literature reviewc. Summary

3. Proposed worka. Overviewb. Detailsc. Pland. Preliminary work

Technical report template

Writing the documentAre you a farmer or a hunter?

Advice: Just start somewhere and write. Make a mess. Break the rules.

Writing the documentWhy is it OK to break the rules and make a mess whenyou write?

Revising the document

1. Structure

2. Paragraphs

3. Sentences and words

a. Sentences

b. Grammar

c. Word choice

d. Punctuation

Use a top-down approach:

http://www.ucalgary.ca/uofc/eduweb/grammar/marking/

Revising the document

Revisit purpose, audience, context, content

1. Structure

a. Did you meet your purpose?b. Do you have a new purpose?c. Did you address the audience properly?d. Did you provide the right content?e. Do you need more?f. Can you cut anything extraneous?

Revising the document

2. Paragraphs

a. Make the paragraph the unitof composition.

b. Ask whether you developed the idea sufficiently.

< 100 words: Developed enough?> 200 words: Split into two?

Revising the document3a. Sentences

1. Sentence fragment2. Run-on sentence and comma splice3. Fused sentences4. Overloaded sentence5. Mixed construction6. Faulty parallelism7. Dangling modifier8. Misplaced sentence elements9. Shift of number or person10. Shift of tense, mood or voice 11. Omissions 12. Lack of variety 13. Illogical sentence (e.g faulty co-ordination, faulty subordination)

Sentence errors are legion:

Revising the document

Sentence fragments

Propane and natural gas on the other hand are still fossil fuels, but they hold the potential for a very good short term solution. Short term meaning eventually fossil fuels will be completely depleted.

“If you write a fragment, you fail.” (W. Heston, 1984)

Where’s the fragment? How would you revise?

Revising the document

Run-ons and fused sentences

I also have us booked at Fareway on Friday from 4-8pm the store manager said the store is busier on Friday than Saturday.

How would you revise?

Revising the document

Mixed construction

Convective heat transfer is when the flow carries the heat.

The reason the coverage of the Olympics frustrates him is becauseNBC focuses on the stories instead of the sports.

Temperatures in Ames will be warmer this weekend.

Revising the document

Faulty parallelism

Sugarbush Ski Instruction

● Exciting

● Lots of experience

● Enjoyable

● You’ll have a great time!

Revising the document

Faulty parallelism

The experiments will involve measuring velocity, samplingthe water quality, and to record the wind speed.

Elements of a list must have the same grammatical form.Compare apples to apples.

How would you revise?

Revising the document

Dangling modifier

Groundwater contamination is a major concern when designing the geologic repository.

What is wrong with these sentences?

How would you revise them?

Varying from a simple lime softening system to a complex electrodialysis reversal operation, the incidence of radium in drinking water can be greatly reduced.

Based on these tests, we conclude that this option is not feasible.

Revising the document

Misplaced modifier

Nailed to the fence, Julie read the sign.

Having eaten the remains of the zebra, we watched the lionlick its chops.

Revise these sentences:

Revising the document3b. Grammar

1. Idiomatic grammatical constructions2. Syntax3. Usage4. Case5. Verb form6. References7. Subject-verb agreement8. Parts of speech

Revising the document

General pronoun reference

These conditions allow MTBE to travel quickly and with little hindrance into the groundwater. This poses a huge problem because the plume for MTBE is much longer than that for any other gasoline product.

Antecedents of pronouns need to be unambiguous.

What is “This” in this passage?

Revising the document

Subject-verb agreement

What is wrong with this sentence?

Revising the document3c. Word choice

1. Wrong word2. Too many words3. Excessive compression4. Diction5. Active/passive voice

Revising the documentToo many words

15% of words in technical writing are unnecessary.

Unnecessary

Necessary

Source: Rehmann made this up.

Revising the documentToo many words

Shorten these sentences:

At this point in time, the firetrucks have not arrived at the airport.

In order to give an estimate of the dissipation, we made measurements of the velocity with PIV, which is capable of achieving small-scale resolution.

He utilized a saw to facilitate the cutting of the wood.

Upon visual inspection, there are three discernible regimes.

Revising the documentToo many words

Put action in verbs, not nouns. Clue: look for “of”.

In all cases the variable dispersion coefficient model provided a much more accurate description of experimental results.

Electrodialysis reversal (EDR) uses electric current to achieve removal of hardness and other ions.

Revising the documentToo many words

Just say it:

I am in a position to complete a purchase of a new car.

Due to the fact that he experienced a sudden illness, it wasnecessary that the trip be cancelled.

You should have a discussion with Prof. Rehmann if you are in a situation in which you have questions concerning the matterof dimensional analysis.

Revising the documentToo many words

Don’t oversay it.

past memoriesvarious differenceseach individual basic fundamentalstrue factsimportant essentialsfuture plansterrible tragedyend resultfinal outcomefree giftpast historyunexpected surprisesudden crisisvery unique

large in sizeoften timesof a bright colorheavy in weightperiod in timeround in shapeat an early timeeconomics fieldof cheap qualityhonest in characterof an uncertain conditionin a confused stateunusual in natureextreme in degreeof a strange type

Revising the documentToo few words: excessive compression

Omit needless words, but don’t overdo it.

An efficient anti-aliasing spectral continuous window shifting technique for PIV (article title)

Revising the documentDiction

Avoid slang:

This report will take an in-depth look at the Yucca Mountain Project.

Avoid cliches:

These experiments go hand-in-hand with the numericalsimulations.

Don’t inflate your language:

The skier’s speed is dependent on many factors.

Revising the documentDiction

Don’t mix metaphors:

He is not the sharpest cookie in the jar.You can beat a dead horse to water, but you can't make him drink. That's the pot calling the kettle's bluff. He's got too many oars in the fire. It's not rocket surgery. I can see the carrot at the end of the tunnel. The monkey is in your court. Not to put her up on a limestone, but my sister is really terrific. We are treading on thin water We'll burn those bridges when we get to them.

Revising the documentActive/passive voice

Prefer the active voice:

The effect of flow length on longitudinal dispersivity was studied by Xu and Eckstein (1995), and it was found that the dispersivity increases with length.

The longitudinal dispersivity increases with flow length (Xu and Eckstein 1995).

Xu and Eckstein (1995) studied the effect of flow length on longitudinal dispersivityand found that the dispersivity increases with length.