Journey Through the Valley: Grief Recovery
Post on 09-Feb-2017
Respect the Do Not Cross sign.
Helping those with grief
The spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to preach good tidings to the poor; he has sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and opening of the prison to those who are bound; to proclaim the couple year of the Lord, and the day of vengeance of our God my: to comfort all who mourn, to console those who mourn in Zion, to give them beauty for ashes, oil joy for morning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness. Isaiah 61:1-3
Definition of Grief
Definitions of griefloss of a loved one in death or divorce, displacement due to a natural disaster such an earthquakeLoss of limb ,mastectomy loss of sensory Loss of hoped-for event that does not materialize,the diminishment of perceived options (e.g., inability to follow a certain career path), loss of specific types of freedoms, or the collective loss one can experience when there is a local or national tragedy
Symptoms of Grief
Symptoms of griefWithdraw sociallyHave trouble thinking and concentratingBecome restless and anxious at timesNot feel like eatingLook sadFeel depressed (use depression inventory and treat accordingly)Dream of the deceased (or even have hallucinations or visions in which they briefly hear or see the deceased)Lose weightHave trouble sleepingFeel tired or weakBecome preoccupied with death or events surrounding deathSearch for reasons for the loss (sometimes with results that make no sense to others)Dwell on mistakes, real or imagined, that he or she made with the deceasedFeel somehow guilty for the lossFeel all alone and distant from others
Myths of Grief Recovery
Myths of grief recovery.Grieve alone, avoid upsetting othersLet sleeping dogs lieReplace the loss as soon as possibleYou must cry in order to grieveDont cryJust get over itGive it time and the pain will resolve on its ownDont trust in the future, there is only nowRecall only the good times to avoid disloyaltyDont feel sad, youll just get depressedBe a good example to others Stay strong and be a good example to others
Why grief recovery is important.Behavioral patterns related to loss and grief recovery are learned These patterns reflect role modeling of caregivers, personal experience, cultural conditioning, verbal and nonverbal instructions (e.g., religion, politics), and expectations, to name just a few. Learning more effective behaviors can increase ones likelihood of recovering successfully from loss and freeing up vital energy. Becoming empowered to deal more effectively with your own losses increases the probability of your being better equipped to offer encouragement and affirmation to others during their episodes of loss and grief recovery.
Stages of Grief Recovery
Stages of grief recoveryShock or DisbeliefDenialAngerBargainingGuiltDepressionAcceptanceCyclical not linear normal = 18 months
How to counsel
How to counselExplain grief cycles. Average time = 18 months. Client can jump from one stage to another and back to first one.Watch for increased depression and treat accordingly. (see link to Joy in the Morning: Overcoming Depression)Empathize with clients feelingsClient should not make any major decisions during this time
How to counselEncourage client to simplify as much as possible. It is difficult to make decisions. I lived on lists for several months because I could not think.It is ok to feel the feelings, but unhealthy to obcess.Client may need to forgive the person who died.Encourage client to maintain normal daily routines as much as possible.
How to counselCounselor may need to engage help of family and friends to assist clientCounselor may need to help client with decision making.As Christians, knowing our loved one is in heaven, may or may not alleviate the clients grief. Be sensitive and dont over- spiritualize give them permission to feel the feelings. God walks gracefully and mercifully with us.
Joy in the Morning: Overcoming Depression
What are the symptoms of depression? (see Depression Inventory in Appendix)
How severe is the depression?Scale of 1-10 (ten the worse)
Scale of 1-10 See Depression Inventory in Appendix
Always access functioning, if symptoms last longer than 2 weeks, consider a referralGoes above a 5, refer to a psychiatrist. Safety issueDifficulty concentrating, remembering details, and making decisionsFatigue and decreased energyFeeling sad or "empty"Feeling hopeless, irritable, anxious, or guiltyLoss of interest in favorite activities...Sadness and or irritabilityLoss of interest or pleasure in everyday activitiesLoss of appetiteor increase in appetiteSleep disturbanceseither insomnia orexcessive sleepingSuicide thoughts or ideations. ..
What causes depression?
Medical causes of depressionChemical , brain imbalanceMedical Pharmaceutical mixing of prescriptionsside effect of medicationGeriatric Spirit of depressionCan lead to clinical depression
Nutritional causes of depressionSugar and refined products impact our brain function including mood, cognitive processes, problem solving Boosting brain function often has a positive effective on mood. Many of the Daniel Plan choices have anti depressant properties. Exercise, eating right, taking supplements such as fish oil, and learning not to believe every thought have been shown independently to boost mood. The Daniel Plan, Chapter 6: Focus.Recommend 10 day detox to clients, cutting out sugar , processed foods and caffeine.
Other causes of depressionSituationalLoss, change or griefFrozen rageSpirit of depressionGenerational curses
Know your limits
How is the clients functioning? High
When and how do I refer?When you are not comfortableWhen client functioning drops below 5 on depression inventoryExpress concern for clientExplain why the referralRefer to psychiatrist or medical doctor to prescribe medicationOk for adjunctive sessionsDocument
What is the wholeness approach?
The wholeness approach: BodyNutritionExerciseMedical reasons 3 John: 2 Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health just as your soul prospers.
The wholeness approach: SoulSoul: (nephesh) a life, living being, self, person, personality, inner desires and feelings.Prov. 10: 3. The Lord will not allow a righteous soul to famish. 3 John 3Talk myself in and out of depression Prov. 13:2, 3 A man shall eat well by the fruit of his mouth.
The wholeness approach: SoulProv. 23:7 As a man thinks so he it. Correct negative thought patterns, it is an effective treatment for anxiety disorders, depression, relationship problems and even overeating. Rick Warren
How we distort our thoughtsOver generalizeThink with our feelings. Assume feelings is truePredicting the future, worse case scenarioBlame self or othersDenialFocusing on negative
The wholeness approach: SpiritGratitude: Yale University research study evaluated more than 2,000 veterans between the ages of 60 and 96 to assess which traits helped them age successfully. Gratitude and purpose were the most significant traits associated with successful aging. R.H. Pietrzak, J. Tsai, et. Al, Successful Aging among Older Veterans in the United States.
The wholeness approach: SpiritPray regularly research shows prayer calms stress and enhances brain function. Gratitude, I Thes. 5:16-18Think on Gods characterStay in fellowship, community, Speak Gods promises out loudFrames our world Heb. 11:3
Empower with choices.
Empower with ChoicesI can choose to think on the good, the lovely things in my life, Phil 4:8I can choose to be thankfulI can talk to a nutritionistI can talk to my doctorI can change my beliefsI can forgive I can make small steps towards wholeness
Strengthen belief system
Identify my Negative BeliefsWhat do I think about myself? What does God say?What do I think about the situation? What does God say?What do I think about my future? What does God say?What could I do to change my situation?
Gods Truth to Combat LiesIsaiah 41:102 Cor. 12:0Matt. 11:28Zeph. 3:17Heb. 4:16Ps. 37:4
Knowledge of Gods love will heal low self esteem and unworthiness
I am loved and blessed with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ. Eph. 1:3I am loved because I am chosen in Him before the foundation of the world. Eph. 1:4I am loved so I am holy and without blame before Him in love. Eph. 1:4
I am loved and I am accepted in the Beloved. Eph. 1:6I am loved and I am a vessel of honor, clean and useful for the Master, 2 Timothy 2:21I am loved and nothing can separate me from his love. Rom. 8:39I am loved so Christ dwells in my heart through faith and I am rooted and grounded in love. Eph. 3:17