How To Raise Your Son To Be A Man

( A Guide For Single Mothers)

Frank Henry

Book Excerpts

Preface Introduction Chapter 1 First and Foremost – Pray Daily Chapter 2 Shaping and Modeling Your Son Chapter 3 You Can Pay Now–Or–Pay Later Chapter 4 Do Everything Possible to involve Dad Chapter 5 He’s Your Son – Not Your Mon Chapter 6 Make Time for Yourself

Chapter 7 Involve You Son in Sports Chapter 8 Know When to Let Go Chapter 9 Don’t Grow Weary – Have Faith Letter to Single Mothers About the Author

Preface I would be remiss if I did not acknowledge what most of us already know. Specifically, that all-single mothers, regardless of ethnicity, share the same challenges, frustrations and joy of raising their children as African American mothers. However, the facts are indisputable, African American boys and young men seem to be more negatively impacted by their circumstances than their counter parts. Some of what this book has to say will no doubt prove to be controversial. My prayer is that the intent of this book will be realized. My hope is to assist the thousands of strong, dedicated mothers attempting to do the right thing for their sons. More…….

Introduction Sometimes the reality of it all can be over whelming, almost 50% of African American males are dropping out of school before 12th grade and according to statistics; Latino males are not far behind. Over 800,000 African American men are incarcerated in prisons. These are alarming numbers and yet there seems to be no answers for mothers crying out for their children. Young boys growing up without a father are becoming fathers and abandoning their sons. Single mothers, many of whom live in poverty, today head approximately 75% of black households. This booklet is written for all single mothers, but because of the disparity in the percentage of single, African American mothers-I felt it is important to include the above statistics. If you are reading this book, you may already be familiar with the above-mentioned statistics. That is why this guide was written. Since you are on the front line of this war; then it is you who should be adequately equipped for the battle. “How to Raise Your Son to Be a Man” is nourishment for your soul while providing strategies for the war that you are waging for your son’s life. More…………

Chapter One

First and Foremost - Pray Daily There is power in prayer Pray for a positive attitude for your son Pray for a good heart for your son Pray for protection against violence and drugs for your son Pray for a good education for your son Pray that you might have the wisdom, love patience and guidance necessary to raise your son Pray for a miracle in your son’s life Pray that your son might be happy and content within his own life Pray for a great role model or father for your son’s life Pray for the strength that you need to raise your family Pray for the right finances in your life Pray with your family More……….

Chapter Two

Shaping and Modeling Your Son

As often as and as early as possible in your son’s life, demonstrate and model how you want them to grow up. Be aware of your their attitude and personality then strive to shape it throughout various stages of their life. More………

Chapter Three

You Can Pay Now – Or – Pay Later Love and consistent discipline are the cornerstones for creating a strong foundation in your son’s life. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Hebrews 12:11 More………..

Chapter Four

Do Everything Possible To Involve Dad

This has to be your biggest priority. Short of your son’s father being abusive, a drug addict or gang affiliated; you should encourage him to spend time with his son. More……….

Chapter Five

He’s Your Son – Not Your Man Your son may look like his father, act like his father and is everything good that his father never was …. But, he is your son, not your man. A classic mistake that I see many single mothers make is in assigning their son the status of “man of the house.” Although this is done with good intention, it often has negative consequences. More………

Chapter Six

Make Time for Yourself Repeat after me…. I am his mom – not his maid. I am his mom – not his taxi. I am his mom – not his entertainer. I am his mom – not his paycheck. More……….

Chapter Seven

Involve Your Son in Sports If possible, get your son involved in a “Sports Program”. Find a program that emphasizes teamwork, discipline and sportsmanship, and then enroll him in it. The reason for this is simple. One of the major influences in our society with young men is athletics. More……….

Chapter Eight

Know When to Let Go Don’t attempt to exert total control over your teenage son. As a teenager, he will begin to exhibit seemingly ridiculous and irresponsible behavior. As long as this behavior is minor (such as not cleaning his room, sleeping late, losing things, etc), relax. More………..

Chapter Nine DON’T GROW WEARY – HAVE FAITH

Sometimes when we are praying, we expect a miracle overnight. That may not be God’s plan. We have to be patient and obedient to the answers that God will provide us for our family. Read the Holy Bible; it contains all the answers for your life. More……….

Letter to All Single Mothers As a mom, you have the single hardest job on the planet. There are a million right ways and a million wrong ways to raise a child. In the end, you have to trust your God given instincts as a mother. Hopefully, this guide will have helped you through the difficult task of raising your son. The results can be spectacular. You have an opportunity to perhaps change the course of mankind through your children. Your son could be the next President of the United States or find the cure for cancer. He may grow up to be a good man, father and a great husband. Either way, you would be proud! Keep up the good work and fight the good fight. Without you there would be no us. God Bless You, Frank Henry

About the Author

Frank Henry is a native San Diegan. He has over 30 years experience working in the capacity of coach and teacher to young men and women. His life experiences as a product of a single family home as well as mentor to thousands of boys during the past quarter century has given him a unique perspective into the lives of young men. This perspective has become clearer with the discernment and wisdom given to him by the power of the Holy Spirit.

On September 4, 2001, Mr. Henry founded one of Southern California’s first inner city “Private Christian High Schools, in San Diego. H-Town Christian Academy has developed a reputation for turning around the lives of young men and women. Students from H-town have been accepted to UNLV, University of Miami, UCSD, UC Riverside, Long Beach State, San Diego State, USD, Point Loma Nazarene, Seattle Pacific, Eastern Washington and Stanford over the past 3 years. In June of 2007, H-Town closed its doors.

H-town Students

Frank graduated from the University of Utah, with a degree in History and a minor in PE. He began coaching in 1979 as a graduate assistant at the University of Utah. From there Coach Henry has coached at San Diego City College, Laguna Beach High School, Horizon High School and H-town. Although he is the founder and Principal of H-Town, Frank Still enjoys teaching classes and coaching the students. His vision is to strengthen families and help our youth develop their true potential through a personal relationship with Jesus Christ